1
00:00:17,899 --> 00:00:19,670
Forward to HR.
2
00:00:19,703 --> 00:00:20,972
Hmm, not quite.
3
00:00:20,983 --> 00:00:22,698
Fix section two and
bring it to my office.
4
00:00:22,709 --> 00:00:24,780
Open door policy.
5
00:00:24,813 --> 00:00:27,652
Tell them no, and swear a lot.
6
00:00:27,685 --> 00:00:30,290
I expect foulness and creativity.
7
00:00:33,441 --> 00:00:35,196
- Hey, how was your weekend?
- Do not care.
8
00:00:35,207 --> 00:00:36,302
Where's the booze?
9
00:00:36,335 --> 00:00:37,505
I'm sure you're capable
10
00:00:37,538 --> 00:00:38,775
of finding a drink on your own.
11
00:00:38,808 --> 00:00:41,064
Come on. Where would I find...
12
00:00:41,344 --> 00:00:43,583
I'll consider this an apology.
13
00:00:43,616 --> 00:00:45,363
Wow, you guys actually look pretty good.
14
00:00:45,374 --> 00:00:46,443
Thank you for noticing.
15
00:00:46,454 --> 00:00:48,392
I am on a new fitness regimen.
16
00:00:48,425 --> 00:00:50,530
I've been practicing on the range.
17
00:00:51,986 --> 00:00:53,692
Didn't practice the spinning, though,
18
00:00:53,703 --> 00:00:55,272
which I thought would be easier.
19
00:00:55,305 --> 00:00:57,243
And I feel like there's
only a 10% chance
20
00:00:57,276 --> 00:00:58,478
I'll attack my coworkers' eyes
21
00:00:58,512 --> 00:00:59,926
with stainless steel kebab skewers.
22
00:00:59,937 --> 00:01:01,774
I mean, you should really be at zero.
23
00:01:02,921 --> 00:01:04,558
- Now it's up to 20.
- Ah!
24
00:01:04,591 --> 00:01:05,804
Eh, still pretty good.
25
00:01:05,815 --> 00:01:07,151
All right, back to basics here.
26
00:01:07,162 --> 00:01:08,465
Missions that make us money
27
00:01:08,499 --> 00:01:09,989
and make the world a better place.
28
00:01:10,000 --> 00:01:11,460
No muss, no waste.
29
00:01:11,471 --> 00:01:13,609
That certainly explains these guys.
30
00:01:13,642 --> 00:01:15,412
You, uh, ready for us to start?
31
00:01:15,467 --> 00:01:16,804
Yep, we're all about efficiency,
32
00:01:16,815 --> 00:01:18,452
so you can start now.
33
00:01:19,855 --> 00:01:22,426
So this "no waste" thing, Lana.
34
00:01:22,459 --> 00:01:25,432
How does that jive with
your office remodel?
35
00:01:25,465 --> 00:01:28,338
It's part of my new
philosophy, true transparency.
36
00:01:28,371 --> 00:01:30,610
The walls of my office will be glass.
37
00:01:30,643 --> 00:01:33,181
Isn't it a contradiction
for a spy agency
38
00:01:33,214 --> 00:01:34,818
to be so transparent?
39
00:01:34,851 --> 00:01:36,287
- No!
- Why not?
40
00:01:36,320 --> 00:01:38,458
Because shut up!
41
00:01:38,491 --> 00:01:41,699
I mean, that's not really
constructive right now, Cyril.
42
00:01:41,732 --> 00:01:42,801
Nice save.
43
00:01:42,834 --> 00:01:44,237
I don't think anyone noticed.
44
00:01:44,270 --> 00:01:45,640
Could you keep it...
45
00:01:46,709 --> 00:01:48,646
Down for just a minute
46
00:01:48,679 --> 00:01:50,550
until the briefing is over?
47
00:01:52,587 --> 00:01:54,625
Mission one of our new era.
48
00:01:54,658 --> 00:01:56,829
The Vanguard is a crew of
international jewel thieves.
49
00:01:56,862 --> 00:01:58,172
Ex-Special Forces.
50
00:01:58,183 --> 00:01:59,267
Highly organized.
51
00:01:59,300 --> 00:02:00,870
They have stolen billions.
52
00:02:00,903 --> 00:02:02,574
Who cares about shiny rocks?
53
00:02:02,607 --> 00:02:03,876
Unless...
54
00:02:03,909 --> 00:02:06,352
- Are we working for magpies?
- Ray?
55
00:02:06,363 --> 00:02:08,875
Y'all, this is our trial
to work with Interpol.
56
00:02:08,886 --> 00:02:11,224
One of their agents is
asking us for the assist.
57
00:02:11,257 --> 00:02:12,426
Wow. Cheryl: Interpol!
58
00:02:12,437 --> 00:02:13,944
This could really put us on the map,
59
00:02:13,955 --> 00:02:16,327
and that map is of
Paris, France, Europe.
60
00:02:16,338 --> 00:02:17,637
Nice! Who thinks I can eat
61
00:02:17,670 --> 00:02:19,295
a whole baguette without chewing?
62
00:02:19,306 --> 00:02:20,651
Bets on the table. Odds are two to one.
63
00:02:20,662 --> 00:02:21,664
- Nah.
- Pass.
64
00:02:21,675 --> 00:02:22,681
- No.
- Obviously you can.
65
00:02:22,714 --> 00:02:24,217
Oh, right, you guys saw that one.
66
00:02:24,250 --> 00:02:25,787
Pretty impressive, and it did make
67
00:02:25,820 --> 00:02:27,356
for an entertaining funeral brunch.
68
00:02:27,389 --> 00:02:28,926
Pam, with all the new hires,
69
00:02:28,959 --> 00:02:31,165
I need you here to keep an eye on HR.
70
00:02:31,176 --> 00:02:33,244
But Paris! And...
71
00:02:34,381 --> 00:02:36,116
Sorry, thought I had it. Didn't have it.
72
00:02:36,149 --> 00:02:38,665
But come on!
I can do both at the same time.
73
00:02:38,676 --> 00:02:40,505
Just like solemnly
paying your last respects
74
00:02:40,516 --> 00:02:42,386
and inhaling carbs.
75
00:02:42,419 --> 00:02:44,424
Exactly. Thank you.
76
00:02:44,457 --> 00:02:46,494
I'll do HR stuff from
the phone over there.
77
00:02:46,528 --> 00:02:47,798
Ugh, all right.
78
00:02:47,831 --> 00:02:49,409
Pam, you'll go with Archer and Ray.
79
00:02:49,420 --> 00:02:50,827
Uh, I like Paris.
80
00:02:50,838 --> 00:02:53,647
Yeah, I need you here to
get Accounting up to speed.
81
00:02:53,658 --> 00:02:54,950
Pam gets to go.
82
00:02:54,961 --> 00:02:56,336
Yeah, but we like her.
83
00:02:56,347 --> 00:02:57,851
Okay. We get this right,
84
00:02:57,862 --> 00:02:59,766
and we'll have all the
Interpol work we can eat.
85
00:02:59,821 --> 00:03:01,549
It's all a part of our new beginning.
86
00:03:01,560 --> 00:03:04,083
And with that, continue.
87
00:03:09,574 --> 00:03:11,846
And in the interest of new beginnings,
88
00:03:11,879 --> 00:03:14,204
maybe we keep this to ourselves.
89
00:03:15,418 --> 00:03:16,787
Don't worry, Lana.
90
00:03:16,798 --> 00:03:19,471
He was probably just gasping
at your progressive leadership.
91
00:03:19,482 --> 00:03:20,952
B-b-b-body!
92
00:03:20,963 --> 00:03:22,800
No, it was the body.
93
00:03:55,637 --> 00:03:59,324
- Synced and corrected by naFraC -
- www.addic7ed.com -
94
00:04:03,983 --> 00:04:05,352
Why does everyone stand up?
95
00:04:05,385 --> 00:04:06,589
It's not like we're going anywhere.
96
00:04:06,622 --> 00:04:07,624
You're standing up.
97
00:04:07,657 --> 00:04:09,761
Otherwise, I'll lose my spot.
98
00:04:10,830 --> 00:04:11,999
Look at me like that again,
99
00:04:12,032 --> 00:04:13,603
and I'll slap you like a Huguenot.
100
00:04:13,636 --> 00:04:15,305
Dude, you need to chill.
101
00:04:15,338 --> 00:04:18,378
The wine they have in
France is l'amazing.
102
00:04:18,411 --> 00:04:20,382
Uh, yeah, this stuff's from Quebec,
103
00:04:20,415 --> 00:04:22,587
and I think it's made
from beaver squeezins.
104
00:04:22,620 --> 00:04:24,422
Ah, the French.
105
00:04:24,433 --> 00:04:26,416
Where's the romance, the intrigue?
106
00:04:26,427 --> 00:04:27,964
Spies do not fly coach!
107
00:04:27,997 --> 00:04:30,904
But they do apparently yell
about how they're spies.
108
00:04:30,937 --> 00:04:32,974
Misdirection, everyone!
109
00:04:33,029 --> 00:04:35,034
Who's this Interpol douche anyway?
110
00:04:35,045 --> 00:04:37,049
All it said was "Agent Z."
111
00:04:37,104 --> 00:04:38,641
Probably some washed-up hack,
112
00:04:38,652 --> 00:04:40,523
a bureaucratic mushroom feeding
113
00:04:40,556 --> 00:04:42,059
on the decaying corpse of Europe,
114
00:04:42,114 --> 00:04:44,352
giving come-hither looks to his...
115
00:04:49,989 --> 00:04:51,078
- Shotgun!
- Shotgun!
116
00:04:51,089 --> 00:04:52,446
Ah, damn it!
117
00:04:56,465 --> 00:04:58,102
Zara Khan, Interpol.
118
00:04:58,113 --> 00:05:01,152
We weren't expecting
someone with your profile
119
00:05:01,163 --> 00:05:02,534
or bone structure.
120
00:05:02,545 --> 00:05:04,048
Well, it's a blessing and a curse.
121
00:05:04,168 --> 00:05:05,563
Uh, what's the curse?
122
00:05:05,574 --> 00:05:07,912
- Pretending there's a curse part.
- L'zing.
123
00:05:08,011 --> 00:05:10,115
So you are officially
independent consultants
124
00:05:10,148 --> 00:05:11,986
joining me on a fact-finding mission.
125
00:05:12,019 --> 00:05:13,532
And unofficially?
126
00:05:13,543 --> 00:05:16,238
Unofficially, I'd recommend
a more modern hairstyle.
127
00:05:16,249 --> 00:05:18,699
- Double zing!
- I would, but I'd be arrested
128
00:05:18,732 --> 00:05:21,972
by the U.S. Park Service
for desecrating a national treasure.
129
00:05:24,644 --> 00:05:26,047
Uh, you in a hurry here?
130
00:05:27,684 --> 00:05:29,020
Always.
131
00:05:31,959 --> 00:05:33,461
Wait, what are we doing?
132
00:05:33,494 --> 00:05:34,865
Like I said, fact-finding.
133
00:05:34,898 --> 00:05:36,034
We're just chasing down a lead.
134
00:05:36,067 --> 00:05:37,904
Ah!
135
00:05:37,937 --> 00:05:40,543
- Jesus.
- Um, was it in that guy's skull?
136
00:05:40,576 --> 00:05:41,745
Doesn't look like it,
137
00:05:41,778 --> 00:05:44,851
but I bet there are more skulls in here.
138
00:05:44,884 --> 00:05:46,054
Well, it's not one of mine.
139
00:05:46,087 --> 00:05:47,791
Wait, what do you mean, "one of yours"?
140
00:05:47,824 --> 00:05:50,128
Well, this one has the
"right" number of heads,
141
00:05:50,161 --> 00:05:51,981
and look at those hands.
142
00:05:51,992 --> 00:05:54,771
Oh! Zero embedded poison sacs.
143
00:05:54,782 --> 00:05:57,296
Well, we're in luck.
The teeth are well-preserved.
144
00:05:57,307 --> 00:05:59,412
Okay, cross-reference those
with our dental records.
145
00:05:59,614 --> 00:06:00,817
I don't know what that means.
146
00:06:00,850 --> 00:06:02,419
I just think teeth are neat.
147
00:06:02,452 --> 00:06:04,591
"Hey, bones, get back inside!"
148
00:06:04,624 --> 00:06:05,793
"No!"
149
00:06:05,826 --> 00:06:07,664
So we're calling the police, right,
150
00:06:07,697 --> 00:06:09,735
since we're so above board now?
151
00:06:09,768 --> 00:06:12,707
Yeah, this is an internal matter.
152
00:06:12,740 --> 00:06:15,813
Internal, like my fingers
in this dead guy's mouth.
153
00:06:15,846 --> 00:06:17,182
Internal like I'm
going to gently convince
154
00:06:17,215 --> 00:06:18,753
and/or threaten the guy that saw this
155
00:06:18,786 --> 00:06:20,261
so he forgets all about it.
156
00:06:20,272 --> 00:06:22,492
Go get him.
157
00:06:22,584 --> 00:06:25,119
I think he just walked in.
158
00:06:25,220 --> 00:06:27,669
Well, that saves time.
159
00:06:27,680 --> 00:06:29,530
Tell me where the Eye of the Serpent is!
160
00:06:29,541 --> 00:06:31,645
Are we straight up robbing this guy?
161
00:06:31,678 --> 00:06:32,981
He doesn't look like a cat burglar.
162
00:06:33,014 --> 00:06:34,216
Because he's clearly a dog person.
163
00:06:34,249 --> 00:06:35,586
- Don't say dog person!
- Boom, got it in.
164
00:06:35,619 --> 00:06:38,241
- No, you did not.
- Whoa, uh, guys.
165
00:06:38,252 --> 00:06:41,052
If you don't tell me, it's
your pinky or your pug.
166
00:06:41,063 --> 00:06:43,736
- Oh, Muffin!
- Your choice.
167
00:06:43,769 --> 00:06:46,140
I... I... I can't choose.
168
00:06:46,173 --> 00:06:47,677
Guess it's both.
169
00:06:47,688 --> 00:06:49,559
- 3, 2...
- Oh, no! Oh, no! No!
170
00:06:50,225 --> 00:06:51,952
I'll tell. I'll tell!
171
00:06:55,559 --> 00:06:57,057
I wouldn't have shot the dog.
172
00:06:57,068 --> 00:06:58,098
And the finger?
173
00:06:58,131 --> 00:06:59,835
I've always thought ten is a lot.
174
00:06:59,868 --> 00:07:02,006
Oh, mints.
175
00:07:05,442 --> 00:07:07,182
This is a real roller coaster.
176
00:07:07,215 --> 00:07:09,363
She knows how to handle herself, though.
177
00:07:09,374 --> 00:07:11,279
- I don't trust her.
- This whole thing is designed
178
00:07:11,290 --> 00:07:13,562
to bond us to her
through intense emotion.
179
00:07:13,595 --> 00:07:14,798
You gotta fight it.
180
00:07:14,831 --> 00:07:17,036
Jesus Christ, you worry too much.
181
00:07:17,069 --> 00:07:19,724
That is famously not my problem.
182
00:07:19,735 --> 00:07:22,547
- Tell her!
- He gets shot, like, all the time.
183
00:07:22,558 --> 00:07:24,829
And safe sex? Forget it.
184
00:07:24,840 --> 00:07:27,980
He is absolutely riddled
with God knows what.
185
00:07:28,141 --> 00:07:29,495
The doctors sure don't.
186
00:07:29,506 --> 00:07:30,542
Good to know.
187
00:07:30,730 --> 00:07:32,701
- Do you think she likes me?
- You're pathetic.
188
00:07:33,813 --> 00:07:35,389
I've done all I can.
189
00:07:35,400 --> 00:07:37,766
That's 3-inch glass
that can only be opened
190
00:07:37,777 --> 00:07:40,149
- by the insurance company.
- Bollocks.
191
00:07:40,160 --> 00:07:41,830
Guess we should probably just give up.
192
00:07:41,901 --> 00:07:45,258
Unless... did anyone
bring a hypersonic punch?
193
00:07:45,269 --> 00:07:46,271
Huh? What? Huh?
194
00:07:46,282 --> 00:07:47,886
I guess I did!
195
00:07:49,968 --> 00:07:51,237
You'll want to get behind something.
196
00:07:57,501 --> 00:07:59,511
Is there any practical
difference between
197
00:07:59,522 --> 00:08:01,426
what we just did and blatant crime?
198
00:08:01,437 --> 00:08:03,675
Mm, it's more the attitude.
199
00:08:03,829 --> 00:08:04,998
Uh, spl...
200
00:08:05,031 --> 00:08:06,501
Do not say it. I forbid it.
201
00:08:08,444 --> 00:08:10,971
- Sploosh.
- I heard that!
202
00:08:10,982 --> 00:08:14,305
And I am sorry you were privy
to that internal discussion.
203
00:08:14,316 --> 00:08:16,154
We try to keep things lighthearted.
204
00:08:16,187 --> 00:08:19,059
Not a problem, though I have
already informed everyone
205
00:08:19,092 --> 00:08:20,863
about the body because
of our stated values
206
00:08:20,896 --> 00:08:24,070
- of openness and transparency.
- Cheryl!
207
00:08:24,103 --> 00:08:25,940
Go get me some staples, please.
208
00:08:25,973 --> 00:08:27,677
Oh! Wait, you're right.
209
00:08:27,710 --> 00:08:29,784
Those will totally hurt more.
210
00:08:29,795 --> 00:08:31,261
Thank you, Kurt.
211
00:08:31,272 --> 00:08:32,909
I'm glad to hear you did that.
212
00:08:32,920 --> 00:08:34,223
You are?
213
00:08:34,256 --> 00:08:36,260
Obviously, because I'd already scheduled
214
00:08:36,293 --> 00:08:38,632
a town hall where I'll be very happy
215
00:08:38,665 --> 00:08:40,342
to hear everyone's concerns.
216
00:08:40,353 --> 00:08:41,406
Uh-huh.
217
00:08:41,845 --> 00:08:43,631
Does it bother you that Cheryl has
218
00:08:43,642 --> 00:08:45,156
a kebab skewer holster?
219
00:08:45,167 --> 00:08:47,937
Mm, not as much as it should.
220
00:08:50,932 --> 00:08:52,616
All right, you need to
tell us what's going on,
221
00:08:52,627 --> 00:08:54,063
like, now, because...
222
00:08:54,096 --> 00:08:56,234
Oh, she's got a little slide show.
223
00:08:56,267 --> 00:08:58,138
Last week, the Vanguard
stole a sculpture
224
00:08:58,171 --> 00:09:00,910
called the Golden Dragon
from a private collector.
225
00:09:00,943 --> 00:09:02,614
This, the emerald we stole today,
226
00:09:02,647 --> 00:09:04,316
was originally one of its eyes.
227
00:09:04,349 --> 00:09:06,688
We steal the second tomorrow
from the National Gallery.
228
00:09:06,801 --> 00:09:08,271
Questions?
229
00:09:08,604 --> 00:09:10,730
Um, feels more like a crime spree.
230
00:09:10,763 --> 00:09:12,834
How does this get us to the Vanguard?
231
00:09:12,845 --> 00:09:15,367
I've chased these guys for years.
They're impenetrable.
232
00:09:15,378 --> 00:09:17,075
The only time they
interact with outsiders
233
00:09:17,108 --> 00:09:18,879
is when they recruit new members.
234
00:09:18,912 --> 00:09:21,736
So we're basically rushing
the Vanguard's fraternity?
235
00:09:21,747 --> 00:09:25,158
No, thanks. My doctor says I
have to cut down on getting paddled,
236
00:09:25,191 --> 00:09:28,063
or I'll develop something
called "dead ass."
237
00:09:29,132 --> 00:09:32,083
What? Sorry my life's cooler than yours.
238
00:09:32,094 --> 00:09:33,865
And Interpol is fine with this?
239
00:09:33,876 --> 00:09:35,450
- In theory.
- That means no.
240
00:09:35,461 --> 00:09:37,939
Every time I've gotten close
to these guys, they bolt.
241
00:09:37,950 --> 00:09:39,286
We're pretty sure we have a mole,
242
00:09:39,319 --> 00:09:40,723
which is why we hired you guys.
243
00:09:41,791 --> 00:09:43,606
Let's all get some rest.
244
00:09:43,617 --> 00:09:46,891
Today you were just back-up,
but tomorrow is the real deal.
245
00:09:48,717 --> 00:09:50,932
So we're turning her
in to the cops, right?
246
00:09:50,943 --> 00:09:52,379
If the French have cops
247
00:09:52,412 --> 00:09:54,651
and not mimes with invisible guns.
248
00:09:54,684 --> 00:09:55,887
What are you talking about?
249
00:09:55,920 --> 00:09:57,055
Stealing jewels,
250
00:09:57,088 --> 00:09:58,424
pretending there's a mole in Interpol
251
00:09:58,457 --> 00:09:59,861
so we don't contact them.
252
00:09:59,894 --> 00:10:01,732
She's obviously part of Vanguard
253
00:10:01,765 --> 00:10:04,103
and even more obviously
gonna double-cross us.
254
00:10:04,136 --> 00:10:06,808
Okay, and you're sure
you're not just saying that
255
00:10:06,841 --> 00:10:08,879
because you're intimidated by her?
256
00:10:08,912 --> 00:10:10,883
And she is not at all into you?
257
00:10:10,894 --> 00:10:12,698
One, she's obviously into me,
258
00:10:12,709 --> 00:10:16,360
because I can read the subtle
art of reverse body language.
259
00:10:16,371 --> 00:10:18,320
And two, I'm not into her.
260
00:10:18,470 --> 00:10:20,446
You seem pretty worked up, bud.
261
00:10:20,457 --> 00:10:22,929
Things will look better if
you go have a glass of wine,
262
00:10:22,940 --> 00:10:25,980
meditate, then gaze
down at the Paris streets
263
00:10:26,013 --> 00:10:27,408
while you rub one out.
264
00:10:27,419 --> 00:10:29,008
That's what this gal is gonna do.
265
00:10:29,019 --> 00:10:30,688
I mean, I wasn't gonna do that,
266
00:10:30,699 --> 00:10:32,448
but I think I have new plans.
267
00:10:32,459 --> 00:10:34,538
Yeah, you guys are probably right.
268
00:10:34,549 --> 00:10:36,282
Maybe I am overreacting.
269
00:10:36,434 --> 00:10:38,037
I'll just call it a night.
270
00:10:41,845 --> 00:10:43,381
Misdirection.
271
00:10:45,451 --> 00:10:47,356
God, I hate being right all the time.
272
00:10:47,697 --> 00:10:48,959
Wait, no, I don't.
273
00:10:48,992 --> 00:10:51,363
It's the best.
274
00:11:00,916 --> 00:11:02,452
Ah, the perfect place to meet up
275
00:11:02,485 --> 00:11:05,091
with your Vanguard buddies.
276
00:11:05,124 --> 00:11:07,062
Mmm, mmm, wow.
277
00:11:07,268 --> 00:11:08,571
Mmm, that's pretty good.
278
00:11:08,630 --> 00:11:10,435
You should order that again.
279
00:11:11,805 --> 00:11:13,709
Ah, the perfect place to...
280
00:11:15,011 --> 00:11:16,929
Be backstabbed by your friends!
281
00:11:16,940 --> 00:11:19,299
- You what?
- I said the first part over there.
282
00:11:19,310 --> 00:11:21,211
Come on. We're just hanging out.
283
00:11:21,222 --> 00:11:22,258
Monsieur, une chaise?
284
00:11:22,269 --> 00:11:23,372
Make it two, pal.
285
00:11:23,383 --> 00:11:25,788
Wow, going pretty hard, huh?
286
00:11:25,799 --> 00:11:28,204
Oh, you haven't seen me go hard.
287
00:11:28,215 --> 00:11:30,369
I think a lot of ladies
haven't seen you go hard.
288
00:11:30,380 --> 00:11:33,147
Also, you just ordered two chairs.
289
00:11:33,180 --> 00:11:34,951
Can you please keep it down?
290
00:11:34,984 --> 00:11:36,896
Everybody's looking at us.
291
00:11:36,907 --> 00:11:39,382
Look, Archer, you seemed pretty steamed,
292
00:11:39,393 --> 00:11:41,464
so I figured I'd let you cool off.
293
00:11:41,498 --> 00:11:43,234
But I just want to get
to know you guys better.
294
00:11:43,267 --> 00:11:45,405
Yeah, probably to probe for weaknesses.
295
00:11:45,438 --> 00:11:47,042
Sure it's not about something else?
296
00:11:47,053 --> 00:11:48,422
Yeah, they told me how someone
297
00:11:48,433 --> 00:11:50,872
posing as an Interpol
liaison kidnapped your child.
298
00:11:50,949 --> 00:11:52,252
That must have been really hard.
299
00:11:52,263 --> 00:11:54,687
- Well, I guess it was diff...
- wait a second!
300
00:11:54,698 --> 00:11:57,351
Why are you giving her
information about my family?
301
00:11:57,362 --> 00:12:00,101
And don't try to plumb
my psychological depths,
302
00:12:00,112 --> 00:12:02,885
because I assure you, I don't have any.
303
00:12:02,896 --> 00:12:05,817
Pam, you're in contact with Lana.
What does she think of all this?
304
00:12:05,828 --> 00:12:07,906
Um, I actually turned my phone off
305
00:12:07,917 --> 00:12:08,919
to concentrate on the mission,
306
00:12:08,952 --> 00:12:12,259
because I'm a professional.
307
00:12:12,292 --> 00:12:13,427
Oh, boy.
308
00:12:15,164 --> 00:12:17,169
HR won't respond to our complaints.
309
00:12:17,202 --> 00:12:20,008
All we're asking is a simple
workplace safety question.
310
00:12:20,041 --> 00:12:22,045
How did the body get in the wall?
311
00:12:22,078 --> 00:12:23,181
And how long has it been there?
312
00:12:23,214 --> 00:12:24,383
Glad you asked.
313
00:12:24,416 --> 00:12:25,886
Well, our working theory is
314
00:12:25,919 --> 00:12:27,557
that the person in
question was rehearsing
315
00:12:27,590 --> 00:12:30,495
a one-man show of "The
Cask of Amontillado"
316
00:12:30,529 --> 00:12:32,165
that, hmm, got a little out of hand.
317
00:12:32,198 --> 00:12:34,436
What? No, that is not what...
318
00:12:34,469 --> 00:12:37,795
Or it was someone annoying
we needed to get rid of.
319
00:12:37,806 --> 00:12:39,001
Seriously?
320
00:12:39,012 --> 00:12:40,816
For the love of God, Cheryl.
321
00:12:40,849 --> 00:12:43,889
Yes, right, for the love of God.
322
00:12:43,900 --> 00:12:45,871
Look, in the spirit of openness,
323
00:12:45,882 --> 00:12:48,119
we don't know how the
body got in the wall.
324
00:12:48,130 --> 00:12:50,730
But you all signed a
non-disclosure agreement
325
00:12:50,741 --> 00:12:52,194
and a declaration that you might see
326
00:12:52,205 --> 00:12:53,542
disturbing things at this job.
327
00:12:53,575 --> 00:12:55,980
So let's all get back to work, okay?
328
00:12:55,991 --> 00:13:00,233
♪ Who wants vegan protein mini muffins ♪
329
00:13:00,448 --> 00:13:01,751
- Screw you.
- Ugh.
330
00:13:01,762 --> 00:13:03,127
Come on.
331
00:13:04,362 --> 00:13:06,400
Cyril, I need you to
do a thorough background check
332
00:13:06,433 --> 00:13:08,625
on Interpol agent Zara Khan.
333
00:13:08,636 --> 00:13:10,910
- I think she's a mole.
- I'm kind of busy, Archer.
334
00:13:10,921 --> 00:13:12,073
Oh, I'm sorry.
335
00:13:12,084 --> 00:13:14,105
Well, in that case, do it anyway!
336
00:13:16,913 --> 00:13:18,962
Damn it, I said get the same one!
337
00:13:19,059 --> 00:13:21,362
Now no one gets it.
338
00:13:21,612 --> 00:13:24,425
So we're really following
this obvious turncoat
339
00:13:24,436 --> 00:13:26,832
into a situation that will
probably get us killed?
340
00:13:26,843 --> 00:13:29,168
And we're really gonna
sit here and listen
341
00:13:29,179 --> 00:13:30,583
to rhetorical questions?
342
00:13:30,616 --> 00:13:32,119
It wasn't rhetorical.
343
00:13:32,152 --> 00:13:33,154
Or was it?
344
00:13:33,187 --> 00:13:34,490
Yeah, who's to say?
345
00:13:34,524 --> 00:13:36,093
Look, if you're so worked up about it,
346
00:13:36,126 --> 00:13:37,930
just run a background check on her.
347
00:13:37,941 --> 00:13:39,288
Well, in fact, I did,
348
00:13:39,299 --> 00:13:41,270
and she has a perfect record of arrests
349
00:13:41,303 --> 00:13:44,410
on every case she's done,
which is the perfect cover.
350
00:13:44,465 --> 00:13:46,269
I say we kill her.
351
00:13:46,280 --> 00:13:47,550
Come on. Let's go.
352
00:13:49,364 --> 00:13:51,001
Sorry, hate to question you,
353
00:13:51,056 --> 00:13:53,767
but should we maybe
wait till it's closed?
354
00:13:53,778 --> 00:13:55,114
It is. Private event.
355
00:13:55,125 --> 00:13:56,400
So more security.
356
00:13:56,411 --> 00:13:58,655
Just means more chances for
us to make them look silly.
357
00:13:58,666 --> 00:14:00,838
- Gotta love that moxie.
- I'm a little rusty.
358
00:14:00,849 --> 00:14:02,969
Moxie is French for
"terrible decision," right?
359
00:14:02,980 --> 00:14:04,183
Spoken like a man with moxie.
360
00:14:04,216 --> 00:14:05,586
It's not called moxie in men.
361
00:14:05,619 --> 00:14:07,922
It's called just being a man.
362
00:14:07,933 --> 00:14:10,083
Oh, so it's called "double standard."
363
00:14:10,094 --> 00:14:13,167
Pff, no, you don't call it that.
364
00:14:25,191 --> 00:14:26,739
Man, what a shit show.
365
00:14:26,750 --> 00:14:28,841
Who was this for, Gertrude Ederle?
366
00:14:28,852 --> 00:14:30,603
Because I am swimming in this.
367
00:14:30,636 --> 00:14:32,239
I mean, mine fits great.
368
00:14:32,272 --> 00:14:35,250
- Yours is okay. Mine is amazing.
- I'm sorry, Archer.
369
00:14:35,261 --> 00:14:37,705
I was just going by memory,
and I guess in my mind...
370
00:14:37,716 --> 00:14:39,353
- Here it comes.
- You have a gut.
371
00:14:39,364 --> 00:14:41,268
- You call this a gut?
- Quiet!
372
00:14:41,323 --> 00:14:42,923
And no! Honestly,
373
00:14:42,934 --> 00:14:45,005
it's really impressive
for someone your age.
374
00:14:45,084 --> 00:14:46,286
Ray, Pam,
375
00:14:46,297 --> 00:14:47,999
go to the rotunda and cause a diversion.
376
00:14:48,010 --> 00:14:51,578
- A big one.
- Uh, in front of everybody?
377
00:14:51,611 --> 00:14:53,481
Archer, come with me, and stay close
378
00:14:53,515 --> 00:14:54,984
so I don't double-cross you.
379
00:14:54,995 --> 00:14:56,365
Oh, sure, joke about the thing
380
00:14:56,376 --> 00:14:57,946
you're actually gonna do.
381
00:14:57,957 --> 00:15:00,062
That's convincing everybody.
382
00:15:00,073 --> 00:15:02,376
Uh, looking a little green there, buddy.
383
00:15:02,387 --> 00:15:03,724
I kind of have a thing
about looking silly
384
00:15:03,735 --> 00:15:05,371
in front of fancy people.
385
00:15:05,404 --> 00:15:06,541
In high school, I was a waiter
386
00:15:06,574 --> 00:15:08,488
at the nicest restaurant in town,
387
00:15:08,499 --> 00:15:10,370
and it wasn't great.
388
00:15:15,704 --> 00:15:19,914
Boy, you're never gonna
amount to nothing, you stay a fool.
389
00:15:20,569 --> 00:15:22,346
Thank you, Mr. Mayor.
390
00:15:23,376 --> 00:15:25,501
That was the nicest restaurant?
391
00:15:25,512 --> 00:15:28,284
Well, it was a small, very shitty town.
392
00:15:28,295 --> 00:15:30,132
Well, now you can purge
yourself of your fear.
393
00:15:30,187 --> 00:15:31,691
Embrace the chaos.
394
00:15:31,724 --> 00:15:34,697
Well, whatever this is,
at least it won't be...
395
00:15:34,730 --> 00:15:38,104
the wedding reception of an
archduke and a movie star!
396
00:15:38,137 --> 00:15:39,741
Pam, I can't do this.
397
00:15:39,774 --> 00:15:42,145
Come on. Nobody knows who you are.
398
00:15:42,156 --> 00:15:43,527
Excuse-moi, didn't you win
399
00:15:43,582 --> 00:15:46,053
the bronze medal in the giant slalom?
400
00:15:46,064 --> 00:15:48,796
Sorry, I'm just a giant skiing fan.
401
00:15:48,807 --> 00:15:50,341
My whole table is.
402
00:15:50,352 --> 00:15:53,358
Everyone, everyone, look who I just met.
403
00:15:53,481 --> 00:15:55,318
Nope, I'm leaving. Ow!
404
00:15:55,329 --> 00:15:58,366
How dare you speak to me that way!
405
00:15:58,377 --> 00:15:59,446
Come on, hit me.
406
00:15:59,479 --> 00:16:01,016
I'm not ruining this wedding.
407
00:16:01,049 --> 00:16:02,520
That's what you think.
408
00:16:02,553 --> 00:16:04,089
You knave!
409
00:16:04,100 --> 00:16:05,681
They're rich, not medieval.
410
00:16:09,032 --> 00:16:10,468
Attention! Attention!
411
00:16:10,502 --> 00:16:12,740
All guards to the ballroom.
412
00:16:13,304 --> 00:16:15,311
Okay. You can see both exits from here.
413
00:16:15,344 --> 00:16:17,683
- Stay and keep watch.
- Oh, so you can grab the jewel
414
00:16:17,716 --> 00:16:19,453
and slip out like the snake you are?
415
00:16:19,486 --> 00:16:20,789
How would a snake grab a jewel?
416
00:16:20,822 --> 00:16:22,593
With its tongue, obviously.
417
00:16:22,626 --> 00:16:24,085
They're prehensile.
418
00:16:24,096 --> 00:16:26,282
Okay, I still have questions
about how it crawls,
419
00:16:26,293 --> 00:16:27,997
but I'm gonna go grab
this thing instead.
420
00:16:28,008 --> 00:16:29,428
You know nothing about nature,
421
00:16:29,439 --> 00:16:30,709
and I'm coming with.
422
00:16:30,742 --> 00:16:33,114
From here on out, I am attached to you.
423
00:16:33,125 --> 00:16:34,761
Oh, what, like a male anglerfish?
424
00:16:34,772 --> 00:16:36,576
Good reference, but I'm still mad.
425
00:16:36,587 --> 00:16:38,157
Hey, who are you guys?
426
00:16:38,168 --> 00:16:40,239
Oh, hey. I'm Officer Night.
427
00:16:40,250 --> 00:16:42,421
You might be wondering my first name.
428
00:16:42,432 --> 00:16:44,659
Officer? We are not officers.
429
00:16:44,670 --> 00:16:45,873
Ooh.
430
00:16:45,884 --> 00:16:48,512
First name, Good. "Good Night."
431
00:16:48,545 --> 00:16:50,348
Oh, I don't think he gets it.
432
00:16:50,403 --> 00:16:52,240
Well, smash and grab time.
433
00:16:53,755 --> 00:16:55,325
That way! You lead!
434
00:16:55,336 --> 00:16:57,608
There is no way I'm
turning my back on you.
435
00:16:59,759 --> 00:17:00,888
I would have gone left.
436
00:17:00,899 --> 00:17:03,374
Ugh! Stop backseat escaping!
437
00:17:03,385 --> 00:17:05,638
I don't care. Get it done!
438
00:17:05,649 --> 00:17:08,565
Yeah, I'm on it. Hold on a sec.
439
00:17:08,576 --> 00:17:11,445
Usually HR complaints
don't involve a dead body,
440
00:17:11,456 --> 00:17:13,361
a town hall to discuss the dead body,
441
00:17:13,372 --> 00:17:16,111
and then a blatant lie
involving Edgar Allan Poe.
442
00:17:16,166 --> 00:17:17,399
Ouch!
443
00:17:17,410 --> 00:17:21,318
I'm on the goddamn phone!
444
00:17:21,511 --> 00:17:24,081
Oh, sorry, your Archdukeness.
445
00:17:24,092 --> 00:17:25,440
I wouldn't worry about it.
446
00:17:25,451 --> 00:17:27,255
It's not like violence
against an archduke
447
00:17:27,288 --> 00:17:28,825
ever led to something bad.
448
00:17:28,858 --> 00:17:30,696
I'll come up with
something for you, Lana.
449
00:17:30,729 --> 00:17:32,399
If I wanted to be a career babysitter,
450
00:17:32,432 --> 00:17:34,136
I would have majored in sociology
451
00:17:34,169 --> 00:17:35,952
at a regional community college.
452
00:17:35,963 --> 00:17:37,650
Fucking fix it!
453
00:17:38,578 --> 00:17:40,448
Here you are, Ms. Arch...
454
00:17:40,481 --> 00:17:42,344
Oh, my God, I'm Malory.
455
00:17:42,355 --> 00:17:44,657
- Sorry.
- You know, systems of power...
456
00:17:44,690 --> 00:17:46,795
Go print an invoice.
457
00:17:52,545 --> 00:17:54,744
Huh? Jeezy-petes!
458
00:17:55,171 --> 00:17:58,317
Archer, we weren't hired by Interpol.
459
00:17:58,328 --> 00:17:59,818
There's a zero instead of the "O."
460
00:17:59,829 --> 00:18:00,944
It's a fake!
461
00:18:03,027 --> 00:18:04,669
Interpol didn't hire us.
462
00:18:04,680 --> 00:18:06,568
- You did.
- It's not what you think.
463
00:18:06,579 --> 00:18:09,017
What I think is that
you give me that emerald,
464
00:18:09,028 --> 00:18:12,268
and I take you to the
cops or mimes or whatever.
465
00:18:12,406 --> 00:18:14,511
I'm afraid I can't do that.
466
00:18:19,854 --> 00:18:21,857
I am not cleaning that up.
467
00:18:25,913 --> 00:18:27,865
We're not so different, you and I.
468
00:18:27,876 --> 00:18:30,470
Wait, I know how that
sounds, but seriously.
469
00:18:30,481 --> 00:18:32,143
You're the mole at Interpol.
470
00:18:32,154 --> 00:18:34,546
"Intermole."
471
00:18:34,557 --> 00:18:35,986
Damn it, it was right there.
472
00:18:35,997 --> 00:18:37,330
You saw my record.
473
00:18:37,341 --> 00:18:38,721
People at Interpol have been trying
474
00:18:38,732 --> 00:18:40,936
to sabotage me because
I make them look bad.
475
00:18:40,969 --> 00:18:43,115
So I hired you personally
to catch the Vanguard.
476
00:18:43,126 --> 00:18:44,647
Then why were you buying us all drinks
477
00:18:44,658 --> 00:18:46,662
and trying to find out
personal stuff about us?
478
00:18:46,781 --> 00:18:48,885
Because Interpol is Snore City,
479
00:18:48,918 --> 00:18:50,723
and you guys are fun.
480
00:18:50,778 --> 00:18:51,888
We do kind of rule.
481
00:18:51,899 --> 00:18:53,917
But honestly, the
real reason I hired you
482
00:18:53,928 --> 00:18:55,799
is I just have to win.
483
00:18:55,810 --> 00:18:58,253
And I knew you would come through.
484
00:19:12,105 --> 00:19:14,076
I've got a motorcycle
stashed on the stairwell.
485
00:19:14,109 --> 00:19:16,596
Can I drive down the
stairs on the motorcycle?
486
00:19:16,607 --> 00:19:18,149
If you're okay with
me sitting behind you.
487
00:19:18,160 --> 00:19:19,379
I accept.
488
00:19:20,894 --> 00:19:23,232
Oh, sorry. Uh, reflex.
489
00:19:23,243 --> 00:19:25,180
No, no, no, I get it.
490
00:19:25,257 --> 00:19:26,661
I mean, look at me.
491
00:19:28,397 --> 00:19:31,236
Whoo-hoo-hoo, motorcycle!
492
00:19:31,269 --> 00:19:32,773
Do you have to do that?
493
00:19:32,806 --> 00:19:36,714
Let me answer your question with a whoo!
494
00:19:38,417 --> 00:19:39,921
You know, we make a great team.
495
00:19:39,954 --> 00:19:41,390
Hard to disagree.
496
00:19:43,527 --> 00:19:46,417
I think if we take some time
building up our trust level...
497
00:19:46,428 --> 00:19:48,331
Then you're really gonna hate this.
498
00:19:48,377 --> 00:19:49,881
- Decoy!
- Ah!
499
00:19:55,451 --> 00:19:57,923
Okay, now I hate being right.
500
00:19:58,260 --> 00:20:01,403
Excuse me.
Can I have your attention, please?
501
00:20:01,710 --> 00:20:02,867
Well, first off,
502
00:20:02,900 --> 00:20:04,904
I want to apologize for yesterday.
503
00:20:04,915 --> 00:20:07,320
I really wish Cyril
wouldn't have gone off script
504
00:20:07,375 --> 00:20:09,614
- and lied to you.
- God damn it.
505
00:20:09,647 --> 00:20:11,350
But you should all know
506
00:20:11,383 --> 00:20:13,487
this is a spy organization.
507
00:20:13,521 --> 00:20:15,181
We do dangerous work,
508
00:20:15,192 --> 00:20:18,231
and that means you're gonna
see some crazy-ass shit.
509
00:20:18,322 --> 00:20:21,458
So while I will try to be
as transparent as possible,
510
00:20:21,469 --> 00:20:23,274
as transparent as possible
511
00:20:23,307 --> 00:20:25,122
is not gonna be very transparent.
512
00:20:25,133 --> 00:20:26,981
Well, that is not acceptable.
513
00:20:27,014 --> 00:20:28,450
Hold up there, face-nuts.
514
00:20:28,483 --> 00:20:29,799
The boss is talking.
515
00:20:29,810 --> 00:20:31,680
Is this part of your assistant duties?
516
00:20:31,691 --> 00:20:33,995
The only part of the job I like.
517
00:20:34,028 --> 00:20:35,699
And let me tell you.
518
00:20:35,732 --> 00:20:38,026
This will absolutely not
be the most messed-up thing
519
00:20:38,037 --> 00:20:40,896
you're gonna see here.
Want to leave? Go ahead.
520
00:20:40,907 --> 00:20:43,336
Want to stay? You just got a 5% raise.
521
00:20:46,453 --> 00:20:47,923
Any questions?
522
00:20:47,956 --> 00:20:49,927
Hey, Jim, do you have
those quarterly reports?
523
00:20:49,960 --> 00:20:52,465
Wow, Pam sure does know her shit.
524
00:20:52,499 --> 00:20:54,570
Blame Cyril, tough love, raise.
525
00:20:54,603 --> 00:20:56,997
So you still gonna do the glass walls?
526
00:20:57,008 --> 00:20:58,612
Well, you know what they say.
527
00:20:58,623 --> 00:21:02,998
People who live in glass
houses are fucking morons.
528
00:21:03,009 --> 00:21:06,717
As soon as she pretended
not to be into me, I knew.
529
00:21:06,794 --> 00:21:08,665
Traitor, god damn it.
530
00:21:08,698 --> 00:21:10,602
These apologies from Pam and Ray
531
00:21:10,635 --> 00:21:15,411
better be absolutely abject
360-degree tongue baths.
532
00:21:16,457 --> 00:21:17,972
Hey, you made it.
533
00:21:17,983 --> 00:21:19,754
- I knew you would.
- What... how...
534
00:21:19,787 --> 00:21:21,457
- what the...
- It was the only move.
535
00:21:21,468 --> 00:21:23,850
No time to explain, but we do need
536
00:21:23,861 --> 00:21:25,364
to introduce you to someone.
537
00:21:25,397 --> 00:21:26,901
This is Pavle.
538
00:21:26,934 --> 00:21:30,041
Yeah, he's apparently
with some sort of group
539
00:21:30,052 --> 00:21:32,323
called, like, I want
to say the Vanguard.
540
00:21:32,378 --> 00:21:34,850
- Did I get that right?
- And he wants to talk to us
541
00:21:34,883 --> 00:21:36,397
about maybe joining up.
542
00:21:36,408 --> 00:21:40,215
And I think we, us thieves,
should hear him out.
543
00:21:40,321 --> 00:21:41,725
Oh, well, hello.
544
00:21:41,831 --> 00:21:43,768
Whoa!
545
00:21:43,801 --> 00:21:45,037
Ah!
546
00:21:48,745 --> 00:21:50,447
Hi.
547
00:22:00,172 --> 00:22:05,172
- Synced and corrected by naFraC -
- www.addic7ed.com -
548
00:22:11,456 --> 00:22:14,395
Made in Georgia.