1 00:00:03,366 --> 00:00:04,999 Hey, Cap'n, got a second? 2 00:00:05,033 --> 00:00:07,768 - It's "Captain." - What did I say? 3 00:00:07,769 --> 00:00:10,403 "Cap'n," like Cap'n Crunch. 4 00:00:10,437 --> 00:00:11,738 All right, but to be fair, 5 00:00:11,739 --> 00:00:13,272 Cap'n Crunch was a war hero 6 00:00:13,273 --> 00:00:14,874 and the primary male role model 7 00:00:14,875 --> 00:00:17,810 in my house, growing up, so... 8 00:00:17,844 --> 00:00:20,179 Anyways, cap-tain, you know 9 00:00:20,180 --> 00:00:21,847 that jewelry store robbery down by grand army Plaza? 10 00:00:21,881 --> 00:00:24,516 - Mm-hmm. - I know who did it... Dustin Whitman. 11 00:00:24,517 --> 00:00:26,185 I put him in Rikers two years ago. 12 00:00:26,186 --> 00:00:27,486 He just got out, and the crime scene 13 00:00:27,487 --> 00:00:29,288 matches his M.O. perfectly. 14 00:00:29,289 --> 00:00:31,223 Okay, what do we got? 15 00:00:31,258 --> 00:00:34,627 Well, security cam shows a male suspect, 5'9"... 16 00:00:34,661 --> 00:00:36,229 Wearing a black ski mask. 17 00:00:36,230 --> 00:00:37,797 He bypassed the McConnell alarm 18 00:00:37,798 --> 00:00:39,365 by using the magnetic kill switch. 19 00:00:39,366 --> 00:00:41,668 And he only stole diamonds, nothing over two carats. 20 00:00:41,702 --> 00:00:43,269 Yeah, exactly. How'd you know? 21 00:00:43,303 --> 00:00:46,305 I'm a Detective. It's what I do. 22 00:00:47,640 --> 00:00:49,375 I'm just kidding. I need a lot more information. 23 00:00:49,376 --> 00:00:51,043 But that would've been a great exit line, right? 24 00:00:51,077 --> 00:00:52,344 The crime techs aren't done yet, 25 00:00:52,345 --> 00:00:53,812 but I'm 100% sure it's Whitman. 26 00:00:53,813 --> 00:00:55,247 Well, let's see what kind of physical evidence 27 00:00:55,248 --> 00:00:57,315 they turn up, and then we can talk arrest. 28 00:00:57,316 --> 00:01:00,152 Actually, hilarious story. 29 00:01:00,186 --> 00:01:03,355 So that is Dustin Whitman. 30 00:01:03,389 --> 00:01:06,524 You already arrested him? With insufficient evidence? 31 00:01:07,959 --> 00:01:10,360 By law, we have 48 hours to find that evidence, 32 00:01:10,361 --> 00:01:12,028 or we have to let him go. 33 00:01:12,062 --> 00:01:13,496 You just started the clock. 34 00:01:17,299 --> 00:01:19,600 What's up with this emergency meeting? 35 00:01:19,601 --> 00:01:22,501 Whoa, Detective Santiago. 36 00:01:22,535 --> 00:01:24,335 Big date tonight. How do I look? 37 00:01:24,370 --> 00:01:26,237 Well, I think you look... 38 00:01:27,907 --> 00:01:30,174 Sorry, that was supposed to be a catcall. 39 00:01:30,175 --> 00:01:31,709 I don't know how this works. 40 00:01:31,710 --> 00:01:33,778 Hey, is this why you were getting makeup tips 41 00:01:33,779 --> 00:01:35,647 from the prostitute in the holding cell? 42 00:01:35,681 --> 00:01:37,849 I just wanted to know how she got such smoky eyes. 43 00:01:37,850 --> 00:01:40,585 Turns out it was an STD rash. 44 00:01:40,620 --> 00:01:41,620 Detective Peralta has made a collar 45 00:01:41,621 --> 00:01:42,988 in the jewelry store heist. 46 00:01:43,022 --> 00:01:44,623 - Way to go, Jakey. - Ah, that's okay. 47 00:01:44,624 --> 00:01:46,024 No. He didn't get sufficient evidence 48 00:01:46,025 --> 00:01:47,325 to make it stick, so we have 49 00:01:47,326 --> 00:01:49,561 the next 48 hours to fix his mistake. 50 00:01:49,595 --> 00:01:51,129 Damn it, Jake. 51 00:01:51,163 --> 00:01:53,932 What evidence did you have when you arrested this guy? 52 00:01:53,933 --> 00:01:55,500 Some pretty ironclad stuff. 53 00:01:55,501 --> 00:01:58,136 Dustin, it's been a while. 54 00:01:58,137 --> 00:02:00,072 Mind if I ask you a few questions? 55 00:02:00,106 --> 00:02:03,442 Well, well, well, if it isn't joke Peralta. 56 00:02:03,443 --> 00:02:05,502 That's it, you're under arrest. 57 00:02:05,512 --> 00:02:06,778 Case closed? 58 00:02:06,813 --> 00:02:08,980 If we don't find something conclusive, 59 00:02:09,015 --> 00:02:10,181 it jeopardizes the case 60 00:02:10,182 --> 00:02:11,883 and opens the department up to a lawsuit. 61 00:02:11,884 --> 00:02:13,218 So cancel your plans. 62 00:02:13,253 --> 00:02:14,520 We're here until this is over. 63 00:02:14,554 --> 00:02:16,855 - Damn it, Peralta. - Ow! 64 00:02:16,889 --> 00:02:18,190 I know everyone's mad at Peralta 65 00:02:18,191 --> 00:02:21,526 for ruining their weekend. 66 00:02:21,527 --> 00:02:22,560 But? 67 00:02:22,594 --> 00:02:23,728 That was it. 68 00:02:23,729 --> 00:02:24,862 I was just demonstrating 69 00:02:24,863 --> 00:02:27,766 for Detective Peralta what a fact is. 70 00:02:27,800 --> 00:02:31,531 Sync & corrections by Rafael UPD www.addic7ed.com/ 71 00:02:48,749 --> 00:02:50,015 Terry, you just pulled two doubles. 72 00:02:50,016 --> 00:02:51,617 You must be tired. 73 00:02:51,618 --> 00:02:53,052 I'll stay for this Whitman debacle. 74 00:02:53,053 --> 00:02:54,687 - You go home. - I'm not tired. 75 00:02:54,688 --> 00:02:56,588 Why would you think I was tired? 76 00:03:07,334 --> 00:03:08,701 I ended up doing 25 minutes 77 00:03:08,702 --> 00:03:12,404 of sleep chin-ups on muscle memory alone. 78 00:03:12,439 --> 00:03:13,605 Tired Terry still gets after it, 79 00:03:13,606 --> 00:03:15,407 that's all I'm saying. 80 00:03:15,441 --> 00:03:16,641 Hey, Gina, can you 81 00:03:16,642 --> 00:03:18,275 order food for us at the Flatbush Diner? 82 00:03:18,276 --> 00:03:19,677 They make the best pies in New York City. 83 00:03:19,711 --> 00:03:21,912 Oopsie, you said something super dumb. 84 00:03:21,913 --> 00:03:24,582 The best pie in the city's at Crust. 85 00:03:24,616 --> 00:03:25,849 Wrong. Ignorant and wrong. 86 00:03:25,850 --> 00:03:28,118 Uh, you think you can just bully people, 87 00:03:28,119 --> 00:03:30,688 but you can't. It's not okay. 88 00:03:30,689 --> 00:03:33,157 I'm the bully around here, ask anyone. 89 00:03:33,191 --> 00:03:36,294 Boyle, you're always blogging on that foodie website. 90 00:03:36,328 --> 00:03:37,662 Which pie's better? 91 00:03:37,663 --> 00:03:39,364 Yeah, whose do you like better, mine or Rosa's? 92 00:03:39,365 --> 00:03:41,800 Oh, uh, you know, I-I haven't 93 00:03:41,801 --> 00:03:44,636 been to either place yet. 94 00:03:44,670 --> 00:03:45,970 Why is your eye twitching? 95 00:03:46,005 --> 00:03:48,740 Wouldn't you like to know? 96 00:03:48,741 --> 00:03:50,942 Could I see you for a second in the evidence lockup? 97 00:03:50,976 --> 00:03:53,111 Charles, I know what's going on. 98 00:03:53,145 --> 00:03:54,579 You've tried both pies. 99 00:03:54,613 --> 00:03:56,381 You know mine is better. 100 00:03:56,382 --> 00:03:58,216 But you're scared to tell Rosa, 101 00:03:58,217 --> 00:03:59,651 'cause you're into her. 102 00:03:59,686 --> 00:04:00,986 What? 103 00:04:00,987 --> 00:04:04,824 That is not true, okay? 104 00:04:04,858 --> 00:04:06,793 I-I-I don't even like food. 105 00:04:06,827 --> 00:04:08,862 - What? - Who's Rosa? 106 00:04:08,896 --> 00:04:10,831 Y-you're the scared one. 107 00:04:13,535 --> 00:04:15,102 Planning your strategy? 108 00:04:15,136 --> 00:04:18,138 No, I'm just making funny faces at him. 109 00:04:19,340 --> 00:04:20,307 This mirrored glass is awesome. 110 00:04:20,341 --> 00:04:22,643 It straight-up works. 111 00:04:22,677 --> 00:04:24,478 An effective use of your limited time. 112 00:04:24,512 --> 00:04:26,980 It is, actually. That's how I got him last time. 113 00:04:26,981 --> 00:04:29,150 Let him stew for a little bit, got in his head, 114 00:04:29,151 --> 00:04:30,351 and he confessed. 115 00:04:30,385 --> 00:04:33,121 - You better be right. - I am. 116 00:04:33,122 --> 00:04:35,356 Hey, make some funny faces while I'm in there. 117 00:04:35,357 --> 00:04:38,059 I wanna see if I can tell. 118 00:04:40,695 --> 00:04:42,330 I didn't do anything, joke. 119 00:04:45,601 --> 00:04:47,302 That's funny. 120 00:04:47,336 --> 00:04:49,537 You said the exact same thing last time. 121 00:04:49,572 --> 00:04:51,473 And how'd that work out for you? 122 00:04:51,508 --> 00:04:53,075 Let's take a look. 123 00:04:53,109 --> 00:04:56,445 Okay. Here's you at your trial. 124 00:04:56,446 --> 00:04:58,080 You in prison. 125 00:04:58,081 --> 00:05:00,015 Me meeting Regis Philbin. 126 00:05:00,016 --> 00:05:01,883 That was fun. 127 00:05:01,918 --> 00:05:03,385 You still in prison. 128 00:05:03,386 --> 00:05:06,422 Me at Splash Mountain, just pepper these in here. 129 00:05:06,423 --> 00:05:07,990 You in prison, you in prison, 130 00:05:07,991 --> 00:05:09,158 you in prison, you get it. 131 00:05:09,192 --> 00:05:11,193 - You got the wrong guy. - All right. 132 00:05:11,227 --> 00:05:13,095 Not ready to confess? 133 00:05:13,096 --> 00:05:15,363 Fine by me. 134 00:05:15,364 --> 00:05:18,200 I got all the time in the world. 135 00:05:18,201 --> 00:05:21,103 No, you actually have 48 hours. 136 00:05:21,104 --> 00:05:23,339 I know the law. 137 00:05:23,340 --> 00:05:25,842 Nuh-uh. 138 00:05:25,876 --> 00:05:29,312 So looks like we're gonna be here for a while. 139 00:05:29,346 --> 00:05:32,048 Should someone do a coffee run? 140 00:05:32,049 --> 00:05:34,919 You know what? Coffee's on me. 141 00:05:34,952 --> 00:05:37,420 Oh, but no froofy frappuccinos or anything, 142 00:05:37,421 --> 00:05:39,222 I've only got, like, 10 bucks. 143 00:05:39,223 --> 00:05:40,556 Okay. 144 00:05:42,827 --> 00:05:46,129 Rise and shine, detectives, rise and shine. 145 00:05:46,130 --> 00:05:48,131 Peralta, I want you to bring everyone up to speed. 146 00:05:48,132 --> 00:05:50,199 You slept in your office, and you look 147 00:05:50,234 --> 00:05:51,936 exactly the same. How? 148 00:05:51,968 --> 00:05:53,836 What are you talking about? My hair is a mess. 149 00:05:53,870 --> 00:05:56,372 Oh, yeah. Briefing room, five minutes. 150 00:05:56,373 --> 00:05:58,674 How long were we asleep? 151 00:05:58,675 --> 00:06:01,611 Just long enough for me to squeeze in quick workout. 152 00:06:01,612 --> 00:06:03,980 So, like, three hours. 153 00:06:03,981 --> 00:06:05,415 - Morning. - Ugh. 154 00:06:05,416 --> 00:06:07,050 I can't believe you live nearby 155 00:06:07,051 --> 00:06:08,652 and you won't let anyone crash at your place. 156 00:06:08,653 --> 00:06:10,921 You people already know too much about me. 157 00:06:10,955 --> 00:06:12,622 I know exactly three facts about you, 158 00:06:12,623 --> 00:06:13,957 and one of them is that you won't 159 00:06:13,958 --> 00:06:15,692 let any of us crash at your place. 160 00:06:15,693 --> 00:06:16,893 Is that a nightgown? 161 00:06:16,894 --> 00:06:17,962 That's mine. 162 00:06:17,995 --> 00:06:20,196 It's a t-shirt from my fat phase. 163 00:06:20,197 --> 00:06:22,798 "If at first you don't secede, 164 00:06:22,833 --> 00:06:24,533 try try again." 165 00:06:24,534 --> 00:06:27,036 When you're that big, you buy anything that fits. 166 00:06:27,070 --> 00:06:29,639 A lot of fat guy clothes have racist overtones. 167 00:06:29,673 --> 00:06:31,641 Okay, a couple of quick announcements. 168 00:06:31,642 --> 00:06:34,111 First, I met our night janitor Ronald. 169 00:06:34,112 --> 00:06:37,448 If any of you are missing hand sanitizer, he drank it. 170 00:06:37,483 --> 00:06:39,984 Second, our warrants finally went through. 171 00:06:39,985 --> 00:06:41,920 We gotta place Whitman at the scene and prove 172 00:06:41,921 --> 00:06:44,222 that he either possessed or sold those diamonds. 173 00:06:44,223 --> 00:06:45,456 I know you're all tired, 174 00:06:45,457 --> 00:06:46,858 but don't forget why we're here. 175 00:06:46,859 --> 00:06:48,593 Because we're dedicated detectives. 176 00:06:48,594 --> 00:06:50,194 - Because Peralta jumped the gun. - Yep. 177 00:06:50,229 --> 00:06:52,797 Get to work. 178 00:06:52,831 --> 00:06:54,532 So we both had good answers. 179 00:06:54,566 --> 00:06:56,734 This isn't a joke. You're ruining our weekend. 180 00:06:56,769 --> 00:06:59,037 Okay, I'm sorry you had to cancel dinner with your dad. 181 00:06:59,071 --> 00:07:00,839 Date. I had a date. 182 00:07:00,840 --> 00:07:03,008 Hey, if Jake says the guy did it, 183 00:07:03,009 --> 00:07:04,843 that usually means the guy did it. 184 00:07:04,877 --> 00:07:06,478 Thank you. Everyone listen to Rosa. 185 00:07:06,512 --> 00:07:07,512 No, I'm still furious at you. 186 00:07:07,513 --> 00:07:08,713 Okay, no one listen to Rosa. 187 00:07:08,748 --> 00:07:10,682 She's clearly an accomplice to this crime. 188 00:07:10,683 --> 00:07:12,651 I'm gonna go take another crack at Whitman. 189 00:07:12,685 --> 00:07:13,952 You've been in there, like, five times. 190 00:07:13,953 --> 00:07:15,020 What are you gonna do? 191 00:07:15,021 --> 00:07:16,054 Annoy him into talking? 192 00:07:16,088 --> 00:07:17,555 Ha, ha. 193 00:07:17,590 --> 00:07:19,190 Two, three, four. 194 00:07:22,728 --> 00:07:24,195 Aah! 195 00:07:28,935 --> 00:07:30,636 Didn't work. 196 00:07:30,637 --> 00:07:32,304 Thank you. Did not work. 197 00:07:34,972 --> 00:07:36,739 Hey, Captain. 198 00:07:36,773 --> 00:07:38,106 Will you please let everyone else go? 199 00:07:38,107 --> 00:07:39,641 I feel bad that I ruined their weekend, 200 00:07:39,642 --> 00:07:41,210 and I can tell they're pissed at me. 201 00:07:41,211 --> 00:07:43,545 I mean, Charles hasn't tried to high-five me all morning. 202 00:07:43,579 --> 00:07:44,980 Yes, I've taken the brunt of that. 203 00:07:44,981 --> 00:07:47,649 Kitchen buds. 204 00:07:47,650 --> 00:07:49,284 Are you sure Whitman did it? 205 00:07:49,319 --> 00:07:50,719 Yes, I'm positive. 206 00:07:50,754 --> 00:07:52,121 Then the whole team stays. 207 00:07:52,122 --> 00:07:54,323 We have a better shot with everyone on it. 208 00:07:54,324 --> 00:07:56,158 Fine, will you at least tell Hitchcock to go home? 209 00:07:56,193 --> 00:07:58,460 His mouth smells like rotten trout milk. 210 00:07:58,495 --> 00:07:59,628 Is there such a thing? 211 00:07:59,662 --> 00:08:00,962 I'm just telling you what it smells like. 212 00:08:00,997 --> 00:08:02,431 Get out. 213 00:08:02,465 --> 00:08:05,233 - Do you have the bank records? - Mm-hmm. 214 00:08:05,234 --> 00:08:07,469 Good thing I didn't reschedule my date for tonight. 215 00:08:07,470 --> 00:08:09,270 We're never leaving here. 216 00:08:09,305 --> 00:08:10,805 Well, maybe that's a good thing, you know? 217 00:08:10,806 --> 00:08:12,740 Saved you from another lame internet date 218 00:08:12,775 --> 00:08:17,712 with some lame guy named Dirk or Mar... garine. 219 00:08:17,713 --> 00:08:19,414 He's not lame, okay? 220 00:08:19,415 --> 00:08:20,815 He works with a friend of mine. 221 00:08:20,816 --> 00:08:22,183 He has a human name. 222 00:08:22,184 --> 00:08:23,618 And I'm not telling you what it is, 223 00:08:23,619 --> 00:08:25,287 because you'll look him up and make fun of him. 224 00:08:25,288 --> 00:08:27,555 I can't believe you think so little of me 225 00:08:27,556 --> 00:08:29,757 that you would just automatically assume... 226 00:08:29,758 --> 00:08:31,292 Is it Luke Mueller? 227 00:08:31,293 --> 00:08:32,727 How did you do that? 228 00:08:32,728 --> 00:08:34,729 Well, you only have one friend... Kylie. 229 00:08:34,730 --> 00:08:36,197 And she has seven male coworkers. 230 00:08:36,231 --> 00:08:38,165 Goatee, goatee, jaunty fedora, 231 00:08:38,200 --> 00:08:40,134 profile pic is a sunset, 232 00:08:40,135 --> 00:08:42,570 Tasmanian devil tattoo, goatee. 233 00:08:42,571 --> 00:08:45,506 Leaving Luke as the only viable option. 234 00:08:45,541 --> 00:08:46,707 Well, he's nice, 235 00:08:46,708 --> 00:08:49,243 and he uses proper punctuation in texts. 236 00:08:49,278 --> 00:08:51,012 - Dreamboat. - And I wanted to go out with him. 237 00:08:51,013 --> 00:08:52,680 All right. You know what? Reschedule for tonight. 238 00:08:52,681 --> 00:08:54,415 I promise I will get us out of here in time. 239 00:08:54,449 --> 00:08:56,150 Fine. I'm holding you to that. 240 00:08:56,184 --> 00:08:57,418 Where's he taking you? 241 00:08:57,452 --> 00:08:59,186 Terrific, let's get everyone involved. 242 00:08:59,187 --> 00:09:01,054 Dinner and a movie. 243 00:09:02,590 --> 00:09:04,858 Dinner and a movie is the perfect first date. 244 00:09:04,859 --> 00:09:06,760 I think the perfect first date doesn't feel like 245 00:09:06,761 --> 00:09:08,895 a first date at all, because you've known each other 246 00:09:08,896 --> 00:09:11,297 for a few years, maybe even work together. 247 00:09:11,331 --> 00:09:13,332 And one night you're laughing, 248 00:09:13,367 --> 00:09:15,334 and then all of a sudden, it's just like blammo! 249 00:09:15,335 --> 00:09:17,136 Kissing. 250 00:09:17,170 --> 00:09:20,672 Cheap dinner, watch basketball, bone down. 251 00:09:20,707 --> 00:09:24,109 So pretty much the same as what I said. 252 00:09:25,344 --> 00:09:27,412 None of the partials match Whitman. 253 00:09:27,413 --> 00:09:29,114 If he did it, he didn't leave any prints. 254 00:09:29,148 --> 00:09:31,016 Maybe he doesn't have any. 255 00:09:31,017 --> 00:09:32,350 Interesting fact about me... 256 00:09:32,351 --> 00:09:34,386 I once burnt my fingerprints off on a wok. 257 00:09:34,387 --> 00:09:37,055 Hi, hello. 258 00:09:37,089 --> 00:09:38,356 What are you doing? 259 00:09:38,357 --> 00:09:39,724 Holt said you didn't have to come in here. 260 00:09:39,725 --> 00:09:41,326 You don't come in on days you're supposed to work. 261 00:09:41,327 --> 00:09:44,229 Because I'm so nice, I brought two pies. 262 00:09:44,230 --> 00:09:46,064 One is from Crust. 263 00:09:46,065 --> 00:09:49,568 And one's also from Flatbush Diner. 264 00:09:49,569 --> 00:09:51,803 Hey, you know what might be fun? 265 00:09:51,838 --> 00:09:54,239 Charles could try them and tell us which one is better. 266 00:09:54,274 --> 00:09:55,507 How fun is that? 267 00:09:55,508 --> 00:09:57,809 - So fun. - Yay! 268 00:09:57,810 --> 00:10:00,012 Yum, yum, yum. Yummy. 269 00:10:00,046 --> 00:10:02,014 You got a second, Captain? 270 00:10:02,015 --> 00:10:06,219 I've got these overtime forms for you to s... 271 00:10:06,253 --> 00:10:09,656 Are you stifling a yawn? 272 00:10:09,657 --> 00:10:11,725 - No, sir. - Go home, sergeant. 273 00:10:11,726 --> 00:10:12,926 I'm fine. 274 00:10:12,960 --> 00:10:16,529 And I filled this out. I just need you to... 275 00:10:22,202 --> 00:10:23,569 Permission to yawn, sir. 276 00:10:23,570 --> 00:10:26,238 Go home. 277 00:10:30,710 --> 00:10:33,345 Please, I'm begging you. 278 00:10:33,380 --> 00:10:36,214 - Oh, fair enough. - Yeah. 279 00:10:36,215 --> 00:10:38,283 That's for women. 280 00:10:40,286 --> 00:10:42,821 - These your glasses? - Mm-hmm. 281 00:10:42,856 --> 00:10:43,855 They're gigantic. 282 00:10:43,856 --> 00:10:45,624 My contacts dried out, thanks to you. 283 00:10:45,625 --> 00:10:48,226 And they're cool. No, they're not. 284 00:10:48,227 --> 00:10:50,529 Wow, you are blind blind. 285 00:10:50,563 --> 00:10:52,598 - Yeah. - You're a blind cop. 286 00:10:52,599 --> 00:10:54,166 How has there not been a made-for-TV movie 287 00:10:54,167 --> 00:10:56,035 about your struggles? Give those back. 288 00:10:56,036 --> 00:10:58,637 Yeah, okay. 289 00:10:58,638 --> 00:11:00,773 Wait a minute. 290 00:11:00,807 --> 00:11:02,274 I did it. 291 00:11:02,309 --> 00:11:03,876 I got Whitman, dead to rights. 292 00:11:03,910 --> 00:11:06,012 I can still make my date? As I promised. 293 00:11:06,013 --> 00:11:07,513 Go get changed. 294 00:11:07,514 --> 00:11:08,781 And by that, of course I mean 295 00:11:08,782 --> 00:11:10,049 throw your glasses in the garbage, 296 00:11:10,050 --> 00:11:11,517 then get laser surgery, 297 00:11:11,552 --> 00:11:13,987 then recuperate... And she left the room. 298 00:11:16,223 --> 00:11:18,191 It's all right. 6 out of 12. 299 00:11:18,225 --> 00:11:19,425 Out of 12? Why? 300 00:11:19,426 --> 00:11:21,460 For the 12 components of food satisfaction: 301 00:11:21,461 --> 00:11:25,098 Salty, sweet, sour, bitter, umami, odor, sound... 302 00:11:25,099 --> 00:11:26,933 Sound? Come on, Charles. 303 00:11:26,934 --> 00:11:29,635 Try her nasty pie. 304 00:11:33,373 --> 00:11:35,040 Oh, wow. 305 00:11:35,041 --> 00:11:36,641 That's the best pie I ever had. 306 00:11:36,675 --> 00:11:38,743 No, no. 307 00:11:38,744 --> 00:11:40,144 - No, no, no. - What's this? 308 00:11:40,179 --> 00:11:42,647 We were running calls to pawn shops 309 00:11:42,648 --> 00:11:43,949 and then waiting for them to call back. 310 00:11:43,950 --> 00:11:45,884 I didn't ask what you were doing. 311 00:11:45,885 --> 00:11:47,819 I asked what you are doing. 312 00:11:47,853 --> 00:11:50,355 Pie taste test, it's over. I won. 313 00:11:50,356 --> 00:11:51,689 That's unacceptable. 314 00:11:51,690 --> 00:11:54,458 If you wanna know which restaurant has better pies, 315 00:11:54,459 --> 00:11:58,095 you can't just have one guy try one pie from each place. 316 00:11:58,096 --> 00:12:00,297 Everybody needs to try 317 00:12:00,298 --> 00:12:03,434 all the pies from both places. 318 00:12:03,468 --> 00:12:07,104 We gonna be here awhile. 319 00:12:07,105 --> 00:12:08,873 Debit card statement. 320 00:12:08,874 --> 00:12:10,041 You were at a parking meter 321 00:12:10,042 --> 00:12:11,275 two blocks from the jewelry store 322 00:12:11,276 --> 00:12:13,244 an hour before the robbery. 323 00:12:13,245 --> 00:12:17,515 Oh, no, you found out... About my wife. 324 00:12:17,516 --> 00:12:19,917 We both have cards, because we share a joint account, 325 00:12:19,918 --> 00:12:21,252 because we love each other. 326 00:12:21,253 --> 00:12:23,153 You're incapable of love, and I'll prove it! 327 00:12:23,154 --> 00:12:24,354 Oh, I'm very tired. 328 00:12:24,355 --> 00:12:26,190 I want my lawyer, now. 329 00:12:26,224 --> 00:12:28,793 Ugh! 330 00:12:28,828 --> 00:12:29,928 You have changed. 331 00:12:29,929 --> 00:12:31,763 You used to go straight to prison! 332 00:12:31,797 --> 00:12:33,631 Did Whitman talk? 333 00:12:33,665 --> 00:12:35,700 Oh, he talked all right. 334 00:12:35,701 --> 00:12:37,035 He asked for his lawyer. 335 00:12:37,069 --> 00:12:40,805 By using words, which is technically talking. 336 00:12:40,840 --> 00:12:42,240 We can't ask him any more questions 337 00:12:42,241 --> 00:12:43,375 till we find his lawyer, 338 00:12:43,409 --> 00:12:44,876 and we can't find his lawyer anywhere. 339 00:12:44,877 --> 00:12:46,645 I'm sorry. 340 00:12:46,646 --> 00:12:48,013 Aah, come on. 341 00:12:48,014 --> 00:12:49,714 Why is there pie here? 342 00:12:49,715 --> 00:12:51,983 That's not good. 343 00:12:52,017 --> 00:12:53,218 I think the world of you, 344 00:12:53,252 --> 00:12:54,520 as a colleague and friend. 345 00:12:54,521 --> 00:12:55,821 - Shut up, Peralta. - Yep. 346 00:12:58,213 --> 00:12:59,947 - Yes! - Another one for Crust. 347 00:12:59,948 --> 00:13:02,150 It's not looking good for Flatbush Diner. 348 00:13:02,151 --> 00:13:03,885 Ah, come on! 349 00:13:03,919 --> 00:13:04,953 You went home and showered? 350 00:13:04,954 --> 00:13:06,354 That's so unfair. 351 00:13:06,388 --> 00:13:08,756 I'm just glad I keep a toothbrush here. Oh, cool. 352 00:13:08,791 --> 00:13:10,058 Hey, can I borrow it? 353 00:13:10,092 --> 00:13:11,960 Uh, why do you wanna borrow the toothbrush? 354 00:13:11,961 --> 00:13:12,961 What possible answer could he give 355 00:13:12,962 --> 00:13:14,195 that would make you say yes? 356 00:13:14,196 --> 00:13:15,263 I wanna brush my teeth. 357 00:13:15,297 --> 00:13:16,898 Jake, it's been in my mouth. 358 00:13:16,932 --> 00:13:18,266 That's the grossest thing I've ever heard. 359 00:13:18,267 --> 00:13:19,334 That's the grossest thing you've ever heard? 360 00:13:19,368 --> 00:13:20,602 You caught a guy on the subway 361 00:13:20,636 --> 00:13:22,337 with a bag of human ears. 362 00:13:22,372 --> 00:13:23,572 Your thing's grosser. 363 00:13:23,606 --> 00:13:24,773 Bring out the meringues. 364 00:13:24,774 --> 00:13:27,476 I brought a few more. That's so many. 365 00:13:29,412 --> 00:13:30,452 You wanted something, sir? 366 00:13:30,480 --> 00:13:32,348 Look, it's impossible to make you leave. 367 00:13:32,349 --> 00:13:35,284 But you do have to sleep, and that's an order. 368 00:13:35,285 --> 00:13:37,921 Sir, this is not necessary. 369 00:13:37,955 --> 00:13:41,024 Also, can't sleep without my whale songs. 370 00:13:41,025 --> 00:13:42,592 Terry, I've seen this before. 371 00:13:42,626 --> 00:13:45,361 Problems at home, so you stay late at the job, 372 00:13:45,362 --> 00:13:46,896 but that only makes it worse. 373 00:13:46,930 --> 00:13:49,065 Everything's great with my wife. 374 00:13:49,066 --> 00:13:50,934 It's just, my brother-in-law's in town, 375 00:13:50,935 --> 00:13:53,770 and we do not get along. 376 00:13:53,771 --> 00:13:56,339 - He thinks I'm a weakling. - You? 377 00:13:57,975 --> 00:13:59,743 Let me get that for you. 378 00:13:59,744 --> 00:14:02,178 I can do it. 379 00:14:02,179 --> 00:14:06,048 Tiny Terry loves his pickles. 380 00:14:06,049 --> 00:14:07,950 He makes me feel so small. 381 00:14:07,985 --> 00:14:09,652 Who cares what he thinks? 382 00:14:09,653 --> 00:14:12,455 You're a police sergeant. You're a grown man. 383 00:14:12,456 --> 00:14:14,090 Now take your nap. 384 00:14:14,091 --> 00:14:15,325 And if I see the lights on in here, 385 00:14:15,326 --> 00:14:18,161 I'm gonna be very disappointed in you. 386 00:14:21,032 --> 00:14:22,899 Are you the idiot that made a Friday night arrest? 387 00:14:22,900 --> 00:14:24,501 I was in the poconos with my wife. 388 00:14:24,502 --> 00:14:25,802 You ruined my entire weekend. 389 00:14:25,837 --> 00:14:28,672 Get in line, because that's their attitude. 390 00:14:28,673 --> 00:14:30,274 Get your own attitude. 391 00:14:30,275 --> 00:14:33,344 He has an alibi, geniuses. He was at Torque. 392 00:14:33,345 --> 00:14:35,886 It's a nightclub in Cape May, New Jersey, all night. 393 00:14:35,887 --> 00:14:36,914 Nice try. 394 00:14:36,948 --> 00:14:38,282 You think I'm gonna waste six hours 395 00:14:38,283 --> 00:14:40,851 driving to the Jersey Shore and back on some fake alibi? 396 00:14:40,885 --> 00:14:42,152 It's up to you. 397 00:14:42,153 --> 00:14:45,388 But in ten hours, he walks. 398 00:14:46,623 --> 00:14:50,427 More like in ten hours, he walks into prison, 399 00:14:50,428 --> 00:14:51,628 when we bust him. 400 00:14:51,662 --> 00:14:53,130 Let's follow up on his alibi. 401 00:14:53,131 --> 00:14:55,399 - Yep, you heard him, Scully, hit the road. - No. 402 00:14:55,400 --> 00:14:56,633 You should've looked into this 403 00:14:56,634 --> 00:14:58,635 before you made the arrest. You go. 404 00:14:58,636 --> 00:14:59,736 Oh, Captain, I'm happy to go. 405 00:14:59,771 --> 00:15:01,172 I love the saltwater taffy down there. 406 00:15:01,206 --> 00:15:02,506 Scully loves the saltwater taffy down there. 407 00:15:02,540 --> 00:15:04,875 No, Peralta's going. Go, Peralta. 408 00:15:04,909 --> 00:15:07,177 Look, I know I caused this problem, but I can fix it. 409 00:15:07,178 --> 00:15:08,846 We just got some new security footage in. 410 00:15:08,847 --> 00:15:10,208 Let me stay here and go through it. 411 00:15:10,215 --> 00:15:12,349 I'm gonna prove that Whitman was at the scene of the crime, 412 00:15:12,383 --> 00:15:14,218 even if it kills me. 413 00:15:14,252 --> 00:15:16,120 This is killing me. 414 00:15:16,121 --> 00:15:18,688 Good. Die. 415 00:15:18,689 --> 00:15:21,758 You know, if it does come to that, 416 00:15:21,759 --> 00:15:25,496 I have but one wish before I go. 417 00:15:25,530 --> 00:15:27,031 Can I please put your glasses on my penis? 418 00:15:27,032 --> 00:15:30,101 I just think that would be really funny. 419 00:15:30,135 --> 00:15:32,336 Hey, can you make copies 420 00:15:32,337 --> 00:15:33,537 of these warrant requests for me? 421 00:15:33,572 --> 00:15:35,172 I'm not your secretary. 422 00:15:35,207 --> 00:15:36,807 You're everyone's secretary. 423 00:15:36,808 --> 00:15:38,576 That's literally your job. 424 00:15:38,577 --> 00:15:40,978 And your job is lying about your taste buds? 425 00:15:42,280 --> 00:15:43,781 I'm sorry about the whole pie blowup thing. 426 00:15:43,782 --> 00:15:44,882 You're right. 427 00:15:44,883 --> 00:15:46,717 The Flatbush Diner pie is awful. 428 00:15:46,751 --> 00:15:50,088 - Thank you. - It's just... 429 00:15:50,089 --> 00:15:51,756 I want Rosa to like me. 430 00:15:51,791 --> 00:15:54,026 All right, do whatever you want, 431 00:15:54,027 --> 00:15:56,162 but most women don't really like it 432 00:15:56,163 --> 00:15:58,865 when dudes lie to them. 433 00:15:58,899 --> 00:16:01,101 Except for me, but I'm wired 434 00:16:01,102 --> 00:16:04,004 to thrive on dysfunction. 435 00:16:04,038 --> 00:16:06,539 Nothing. 436 00:16:06,574 --> 00:16:09,441 Wait, wait, wait. This guy... 5'9 " or 5'10", 437 00:16:09,442 --> 00:16:10,609 black knit cap. 438 00:16:10,643 --> 00:16:12,097 Come on, come on, come on. 439 00:16:12,112 --> 00:16:13,766 Gotcha! 440 00:16:13,780 --> 00:16:17,149 Ugh, it's not him. 441 00:16:17,184 --> 00:16:20,419 Let's just arrest this guy. Who even cares anymore? 442 00:16:20,454 --> 00:16:22,922 So how'd my new best friend Luke take it 443 00:16:22,923 --> 00:16:24,123 when you cancelled on him again? 444 00:16:24,157 --> 00:16:27,459 Don't know, hasn't called me back. 445 00:16:27,460 --> 00:16:28,827 Which is what always happens, 446 00:16:28,828 --> 00:16:31,864 because it's impossible to be a cop and date. 447 00:16:31,898 --> 00:16:35,067 Amy, look. There is a guy out there 448 00:16:35,068 --> 00:16:36,935 with incredibly low standards 449 00:16:36,936 --> 00:16:39,305 and a super weird soul patch, 450 00:16:39,339 --> 00:16:41,307 and he is waiting for you. 451 00:16:41,341 --> 00:16:45,411 Amy, my patch tingles for you. 452 00:16:45,445 --> 00:16:48,414 We will wed on the isle of New Jersey. 453 00:16:48,448 --> 00:16:50,549 Our first dance will be to Jessie's girl, 454 00:16:50,550 --> 00:16:53,251 because my name is definitely Jessie. 455 00:16:53,252 --> 00:16:54,620 - It's so romantic. - Hey, guys. 456 00:16:54,621 --> 00:16:55,854 Hey. 457 00:16:55,855 --> 00:16:58,190 Yeah, there's good news, and there's bad news. 458 00:16:58,224 --> 00:17:01,860 The bad news is my saltwater taffy place was closed. 459 00:17:01,861 --> 00:17:03,160 And the good news? 460 00:17:03,161 --> 00:17:04,661 Whitman's alibi checked out. 461 00:17:04,696 --> 00:17:07,631 Security footage from Torque shows he was there. 462 00:17:07,632 --> 00:17:09,300 That's not good news. 463 00:17:09,334 --> 00:17:12,436 - That's bad news. - Right. That is bad news. 464 00:17:12,437 --> 00:17:14,538 Sorry, it's on me. 465 00:17:14,539 --> 00:17:16,406 No, Detective Scully, it's on Peralta. 466 00:17:16,441 --> 00:17:20,210 No, Captain, that's on Santiago. 467 00:17:20,211 --> 00:17:22,278 It's on me. It's still on me. 468 00:17:24,214 --> 00:17:25,815 This is such a disaster. 469 00:17:25,849 --> 00:17:28,217 It's not good. D.A.'s furious. 470 00:17:28,218 --> 00:17:29,953 Whitman and his lawyer are in my office right now, 471 00:17:29,954 --> 00:17:32,422 gunning for a lawsuit. No, not that. 472 00:17:32,456 --> 00:17:34,691 My brother-in-law is coming to have dinner with me 473 00:17:34,692 --> 00:17:37,360 on his way to JFK. 474 00:17:39,063 --> 00:17:43,400 But also the botched investigation, that's bad too. 475 00:17:45,903 --> 00:17:47,203 Okay, what can I do? 476 00:17:47,238 --> 00:17:50,373 Oh, your services will not be necessary, 477 00:17:50,374 --> 00:17:52,742 because you need to go home and change for your date. 478 00:17:52,743 --> 00:17:54,677 - What? - I called handsome Luke. 479 00:17:54,678 --> 00:17:56,246 I explained the weekend was entirely 480 00:17:56,247 --> 00:17:57,580 my fault, partially. 481 00:17:57,581 --> 00:17:58,982 And he wants to go out with you tonight. 482 00:17:59,016 --> 00:18:01,585 - Thanks, Peralta. - You're welcome. 483 00:18:01,620 --> 00:18:02,720 Just promise me you won't use the condoms 484 00:18:02,721 --> 00:18:04,154 in the secret pocket of your purse, okay? 485 00:18:04,155 --> 00:18:06,123 - They're expired. - How do you know what's in my purse? 486 00:18:06,157 --> 00:18:07,925 I needed concealer for a zit. 487 00:18:07,959 --> 00:18:11,261 Plus, you know, we spend so much time together here, 488 00:18:11,262 --> 00:18:13,263 I know everything about everyone. 489 00:18:13,264 --> 00:18:16,066 I know Hitchcock went bald at 15. 490 00:18:16,067 --> 00:18:18,134 Scully used to date Hitchcock's wife. 491 00:18:18,135 --> 00:18:20,370 Charles has a bike with a little basket on the front. 492 00:18:20,371 --> 00:18:21,971 How else would you carry baguettes? 493 00:18:21,972 --> 00:18:24,541 And Rosa has a shower in her apartment, I think. 494 00:18:24,542 --> 00:18:26,009 I got nothing on her. 495 00:18:26,010 --> 00:18:27,143 Good. 496 00:18:27,178 --> 00:18:29,379 Well, I guess we did just spend 48 hours 497 00:18:29,380 --> 00:18:32,316 locked in here together. 498 00:18:34,753 --> 00:18:36,520 Holy crap. 499 00:18:36,521 --> 00:18:38,322 - What? - Locked in here together. 500 00:18:38,356 --> 00:18:40,391 So we will be filing a wrongful arrest suit 501 00:18:40,392 --> 00:18:42,192 against the NYPD. 502 00:18:42,227 --> 00:18:45,629 And when I win, I'm gonna buy club Torque, 503 00:18:45,630 --> 00:18:46,730 put a statue of Jake Peralta 504 00:18:46,731 --> 00:18:48,132 right in the middle of the dance floor. 505 00:18:48,133 --> 00:18:50,234 First off, that's a terrible threat. 506 00:18:50,235 --> 00:18:51,669 I would love to have a statue of myself 507 00:18:51,670 --> 00:18:53,003 in the middle of a dance club. 508 00:18:53,004 --> 00:18:54,304 Second... 509 00:18:54,305 --> 00:18:55,739 Do me a favor, take a look at this picture, 510 00:18:55,740 --> 00:18:56,940 and tell me what you see. 511 00:18:56,975 --> 00:18:58,843 You and Regis Philbin. 512 00:18:58,877 --> 00:19:00,044 Awesome, right? 513 00:19:00,045 --> 00:19:01,379 Surprisingly down-to-earth guy 514 00:19:01,380 --> 00:19:03,147 and definitely not the picture I meant to show you. 515 00:19:03,148 --> 00:19:04,716 But take a look at this. 516 00:19:04,717 --> 00:19:07,953 That's right, it's you and your old cell mate Marcus Cole. 517 00:19:08,020 --> 00:19:11,190 And here he is again outside the jewelry store. 518 00:19:11,224 --> 00:19:12,925 The two of you planned this together in prison. 519 00:19:12,926 --> 00:19:14,327 You taught him your M.O, 520 00:19:14,328 --> 00:19:15,661 he pulled off the robbery, 521 00:19:15,662 --> 00:19:18,431 you got yourself an alibi, and you split the loot. 522 00:19:18,465 --> 00:19:21,100 Oh, man, I can't believe he caught us. 523 00:19:21,101 --> 00:19:22,335 Of course he did, 524 00:19:22,336 --> 00:19:23,536 Peralta is the best! 525 00:19:23,537 --> 00:19:25,304 Aw, thanks, Reg. That's enough. 526 00:19:25,305 --> 00:19:26,572 Yeah, I gotta work on my Regis. 527 00:19:26,573 --> 00:19:27,907 Anyway, see ya in jail, Whitman. 528 00:19:27,941 --> 00:19:30,376 You got anything else to say? 529 00:19:31,712 --> 00:19:34,748 Hey, Rosa, the Flatbush Diner's pie is terrible. 530 00:19:34,749 --> 00:19:36,016 It's inedible. 531 00:19:36,017 --> 00:19:37,484 Food is supposed to be edible. 532 00:19:37,519 --> 00:19:38,619 So you were lying? 533 00:19:38,620 --> 00:19:41,055 What the hell, Boyle? 534 00:19:41,056 --> 00:19:43,391 Put it in the suck-it bucket. 535 00:19:43,392 --> 00:19:45,459 Crust isn't any better. 536 00:19:45,494 --> 00:19:48,195 It's fancier, but it's all bells and whistles. 537 00:19:48,230 --> 00:19:50,731 Desserts don't need to be clever. 538 00:19:50,765 --> 00:19:52,500 They just need to be good. 539 00:19:52,501 --> 00:19:56,237 This is the best pie in New York City... 540 00:19:56,238 --> 00:20:01,276 Apple from Argos Bakery, founded 1910. 541 00:20:01,277 --> 00:20:04,446 Recipe unchanged. Taste it. 542 00:20:08,251 --> 00:20:09,885 Damn, it is amazing. 543 00:20:09,919 --> 00:20:11,686 This pie is so good, I hate it. 544 00:20:11,687 --> 00:20:13,488 You just graduated pie school, bitches. 545 00:20:13,489 --> 00:20:16,091 Sorry I said "bitches," I'm just really worked up. 546 00:20:16,092 --> 00:20:17,993 Yow! Mmm, what is that? 547 00:20:18,028 --> 00:20:20,996 Sorry for screwing up everyone's weekend. 548 00:20:21,031 --> 00:20:24,700 Hey, uh, drinks on me. Who's in? 549 00:20:24,701 --> 00:20:26,168 Oh, no way. No, I got the date. I gotta change. 550 00:20:26,203 --> 00:20:28,571 - Come on. - Everyone's tired, Peralta. 551 00:20:28,572 --> 00:20:29,939 They just wanna go home. 552 00:20:29,973 --> 00:20:31,640 Yeah, but I have to prove I'm not selfish, 553 00:20:31,641 --> 00:20:32,842 so I don't care what they want. 554 00:20:32,843 --> 00:20:35,044 That sounded bad. 555 00:20:36,979 --> 00:20:38,947 And to make up for what I did, I'll cover 556 00:20:38,981 --> 00:20:39,981 one shift each for all of you. 557 00:20:39,982 --> 00:20:41,283 No kidding? 558 00:20:41,284 --> 00:20:42,718 - Except Santiago. - What? 559 00:20:42,719 --> 00:20:43,919 I got you your date back. 560 00:20:43,920 --> 00:20:47,089 One nice thing from me is all you get. 561 00:20:47,090 --> 00:20:49,358 So this is my desk. 562 00:20:49,359 --> 00:20:50,659 Desk jockey, huh? 563 00:20:50,660 --> 00:20:53,062 You just sit here, eat your pickles, 564 00:20:53,096 --> 00:20:54,797 wait for the criminals to turn themselves in. 565 00:20:54,798 --> 00:20:56,332 Actually, I don't like pickles that much. 566 00:20:56,333 --> 00:20:57,833 Terry, I'm glad I found you. 567 00:20:57,868 --> 00:20:59,935 There's been a development in the Russian mob case. 568 00:20:59,936 --> 00:21:01,337 Oh? Yeah, our killer 569 00:21:01,371 --> 00:21:02,571 has been spotted in the warehouse 570 00:21:02,572 --> 00:21:04,239 down by the canal. Get your gear. 571 00:21:04,240 --> 00:21:06,241 So you want me first through the door, sir? 572 00:21:06,242 --> 00:21:07,410 Oh, it's just you. 573 00:21:07,411 --> 00:21:09,145 The SWAT team is on another call, 574 00:21:09,179 --> 00:21:11,347 so you'll have to do it alone. 575 00:21:11,348 --> 00:21:13,450 Hey, I'm not gonna be able to make dinner tonight. 576 00:21:13,451 --> 00:21:15,619 Hey, no, do your thing, do your thing. 577 00:21:15,620 --> 00:21:17,954 Go, Terry. 578 00:21:17,955 --> 00:21:20,425 You can crash on my couch. 579 00:21:20,426 --> 00:21:23,185 I even downloaded you some whale songs. 580 00:21:23,186 --> 00:21:25,774 Thank you, sir. I'll never forget it. 581 00:21:29,465 --> 00:21:31,437 Good night, Terry. 582 00:21:32,416 --> 00:21:36,425 Sync & corrections by Rafael UPD www.addic7ed.com/