1 00:00:01,804 --> 00:00:04,136 All right, here's where we stand. 2 00:00:04,138 --> 00:00:05,372 This nightclub is the home base 3 00:00:05,373 --> 00:00:06,907 for the Maric crime syndicate. 4 00:00:06,908 --> 00:00:08,608 I've been tracking the club owner, 5 00:00:08,609 --> 00:00:11,611 Vladimir Drogic, aka The Dragon, 6 00:00:11,646 --> 00:00:14,281 aka my first perp with a cool nickname. 7 00:00:14,282 --> 00:00:16,149 What about El Baboso, The Dagger? 8 00:00:16,150 --> 00:00:18,051 Yeah, turns out Rosa was lying about that. 9 00:00:18,052 --> 00:00:20,687 El Baboso actually means "the slug." 10 00:00:20,688 --> 00:00:22,856 Ha ha, tonto. That means "dumb-dumb." 11 00:00:22,857 --> 00:00:23,857 It was very cruel. 12 00:00:23,858 --> 00:00:25,158 I referred to myself as El Baboso 13 00:00:25,159 --> 00:00:27,027 to several beautiful Latina ladies. 14 00:00:27,028 --> 00:00:28,562 Oh, that's your type, isn't it, Jakey? 15 00:00:28,563 --> 00:00:31,565 Like Sophia and Sa... 16 00:00:31,566 --> 00:00:33,500 Anyway, The Dragon is involved 17 00:00:33,501 --> 00:00:35,635 in several counts of human trafficking 18 00:00:35,636 --> 00:00:37,137 as well as... 19 00:00:37,138 --> 00:00:38,972 I'm sorry, what's going on? Who are you? 20 00:00:38,973 --> 00:00:40,540 Drexel with the Organized Crime unit. 21 00:00:40,541 --> 00:00:42,075 I'm here for the Maric case materials. 22 00:00:42,076 --> 00:00:43,443 Oh, are you? 23 00:00:43,444 --> 00:00:46,179 Well, we'll see what my captain has to say about this. 24 00:00:46,180 --> 00:00:48,415 Thank you for taking the materials. 25 00:00:48,416 --> 00:00:50,183 Make sure you also pick up the files 26 00:00:50,184 --> 00:00:51,485 that are on Peralta's desk. 27 00:00:51,486 --> 00:00:54,020 Wow, that is not how I saw it playing out. 28 00:00:54,021 --> 00:00:56,022 Sir, I thought you said this was my case. 29 00:00:56,023 --> 00:00:57,324 I gave you two weeks. 30 00:00:57,325 --> 00:00:59,993 I'm done fending off the Organized Crime unit. 31 00:00:59,994 --> 00:01:02,195 Squad, since Peralta's briefing was cut short, 32 00:01:02,196 --> 00:01:04,364 you can all use this time to clean up your desks. 33 00:01:04,365 --> 00:01:05,832 Look at this place: half-eaten food, 34 00:01:05,833 --> 00:01:08,401 crumpled tissues, pictures of your families. 35 00:01:08,402 --> 00:01:09,669 What's wrong with pictures? 36 00:01:09,670 --> 00:01:11,037 If you love someone, 37 00:01:11,038 --> 00:01:14,341 you'll remember what they look like. 38 00:01:14,342 --> 00:01:16,176 - What is this? - Rubber band ball. 39 00:01:16,177 --> 00:01:18,779 Keep your bands in a box or a bag. 40 00:01:18,780 --> 00:01:21,481 Since you all apparently have time to play throw, 41 00:01:21,482 --> 00:01:23,016 I'm canceling overtime for the month, 42 00:01:23,017 --> 00:01:24,418 effective immediately. 43 00:01:24,419 --> 00:01:26,887 Get to work! And de-ball these bands. 44 00:01:30,743 --> 00:01:35,235 Brooklyn Nine-Nine - 02x16 The Wednesday 45 00:01:39,860 --> 00:01:43,079 sync and correction by solfieri www.addic7ed.com 46 00:01:46,908 --> 00:01:48,108 What is going on? 47 00:01:48,109 --> 00:01:49,576 Holt's been in a bad mood all week. 48 00:01:49,577 --> 00:01:51,044 Did somebody do something to set him off? 49 00:01:51,045 --> 00:01:54,748 Jake, are you seriously asking why Captain Holt is mad? 50 00:01:54,749 --> 00:01:57,084 - What do you mean? - The Wednesday incident. 51 00:01:57,085 --> 00:01:59,453 Hey, hey, just closed my tenth felony of the month, 52 00:01:59,454 --> 00:02:00,821 and I thought we could celebrate. 53 00:02:00,822 --> 00:02:02,556 Might I remind you that this is a police precinct 54 00:02:02,557 --> 00:02:03,657 and it's 10:00 in the morning? 55 00:02:03,658 --> 00:02:05,025 Thought you might say that. 56 00:02:05,026 --> 00:02:07,594 That's why this is nonalcoholic sparkling cider. 57 00:02:07,595 --> 00:02:09,963 There's absolutely nothing you could be mad about. 58 00:02:11,265 --> 00:02:14,067 Uh-oh. 59 00:02:14,068 --> 00:02:16,570 No, no, no, look, I was the first one in on Wednesday. 60 00:02:16,571 --> 00:02:18,338 This story's already full of holes. 61 00:02:18,339 --> 00:02:20,574 He was in a bad mood before those sprinklers went off. 62 00:02:20,575 --> 00:02:21,942 Something must have happened at home. 63 00:02:21,943 --> 00:02:23,543 Dude, just admit that you ruined everything 64 00:02:23,544 --> 00:02:25,379 and you turned our lives into a living hell. 65 00:02:25,380 --> 00:02:28,015 - No biggie. - You guys, this is not my fault. 66 00:02:28,016 --> 00:02:29,282 Boyle, you believe me, right? 67 00:02:29,283 --> 00:02:30,651 Don't make me do this, Jake. 68 00:02:30,652 --> 00:02:31,652 Betrayed! 69 00:02:31,653 --> 00:02:33,020 All right, you know what? Fine. 70 00:02:33,021 --> 00:02:35,856 I'm gonna prove to all of you that something else is responsible for his bad mood. 71 00:02:35,857 --> 00:02:37,591 It's probably Boyle. 72 00:02:37,592 --> 00:02:41,028 Don't worry about it. Don't open it. 73 00:02:41,029 --> 00:02:42,062 No personal calls. 74 00:02:42,063 --> 00:02:43,697 What the hell? That was Marcus. 75 00:02:43,698 --> 00:02:45,332 He's gonna think I hung up on him. 76 00:02:45,333 --> 00:02:46,967 Leave him wanting more. 77 00:02:46,968 --> 00:02:49,436 That's basic seduction stuff, Diaz. 78 00:02:49,437 --> 00:02:51,371 Captain Holt has been in a bad mood, 79 00:02:51,372 --> 00:02:54,141 and I'm not letting it get any worse on my watch. 80 00:02:54,142 --> 00:02:55,642 I need overtime back. 81 00:02:55,643 --> 00:02:57,311 Ladies and gentlemen, 82 00:02:57,312 --> 00:02:59,880 six banks robbed in three weeks, 83 00:02:59,881 --> 00:03:04,585 $250,000 stolen, citizens trembling in fear. 84 00:03:04,586 --> 00:03:05,819 Well, no more. 85 00:03:05,820 --> 00:03:07,487 Boyle, you got your bank robber. 86 00:03:07,488 --> 00:03:09,356 Went home last night... no overtime. 87 00:03:09,357 --> 00:03:12,125 Just me and some brie, and I cracked it. 88 00:03:12,126 --> 00:03:13,961 So here he is, 89 00:03:13,962 --> 00:03:16,630 the thug that's been terrorizing the city. 90 00:03:16,631 --> 00:03:18,999 Say hello, Marvin. 91 00:03:19,000 --> 00:03:20,467 Hello. 92 00:03:20,468 --> 00:03:22,836 Oh, my God, he's so old. 93 00:03:22,837 --> 00:03:25,506 He's not that old. His nurse isn't even full-time. 94 00:03:25,507 --> 00:03:27,808 He couldn't pull off a bank job. 95 00:03:27,809 --> 00:03:30,010 He couldn't pull off the cap on his medicine. 96 00:03:30,011 --> 00:03:31,011 I can hear you. 97 00:03:31,012 --> 00:03:32,045 Sorry. 98 00:03:32,046 --> 00:03:34,448 Hey, this guy is a ruthless criminal. 99 00:03:34,449 --> 00:03:37,384 I'm sorry, sir. Is this gonna take long? 100 00:03:37,385 --> 00:03:40,821 'Cause I was hoping to buy some slacks this afternoon. 101 00:03:40,822 --> 00:03:43,390 I like corduroy. You like corduroy? 102 00:03:43,391 --> 00:03:45,592 - I love corduroy. - He likes corduroy. 103 00:03:45,593 --> 00:03:48,228 You sure you have the right guy? Wasn't the robber strong and fast? 104 00:03:48,229 --> 00:03:51,431 - And able to eat solid foods? - Nobody saw him eat. 105 00:03:51,432 --> 00:03:52,900 The guy wore a rubber mask, 106 00:03:52,901 --> 00:03:54,501 and his voice was disguised. 107 00:03:54,502 --> 00:03:57,404 My system is a little unsettled. 108 00:03:57,405 --> 00:03:59,439 Could I trouble you for a ginger ale? 109 00:03:59,440 --> 00:04:01,675 Oh, of course, sir. 110 00:04:01,676 --> 00:04:04,411 We'll get that and a comfy chair for you to sit in. 111 00:04:04,412 --> 00:04:05,779 Yeah. 112 00:04:08,516 --> 00:04:10,150 I robbed those banks. 113 00:04:10,151 --> 00:04:11,585 I don't even need the money, 114 00:04:11,586 --> 00:04:14,588 but I like to see the tellers squirm. 115 00:04:14,589 --> 00:04:18,158 - I get off on violence. - Oh, my God. 116 00:04:18,159 --> 00:04:21,028 - Here you go. - Oh, thank you so much. 117 00:04:21,029 --> 00:04:24,498 You're such a doll. I must pay you. 118 00:04:24,499 --> 00:04:27,434 No, no, no, I insist. I insist. 119 00:04:27,435 --> 00:04:28,435 Right here. 120 00:04:28,436 --> 00:04:30,871 You remind me of my granddaughter. 121 00:04:30,872 --> 00:04:34,141 Oh, you are so sweet. 122 00:04:37,212 --> 00:04:39,279 I haven't got a granddaughter. 123 00:04:42,217 --> 00:04:43,250 What are you doing here? 124 00:04:43,251 --> 00:04:45,819 You're not scheduled to work today, and overtime is canceled. 125 00:04:45,820 --> 00:04:47,388 Yeah, well, remember about a week ago 126 00:04:47,389 --> 00:04:49,423 when I came in here with a bottle of sparkling cider? 127 00:04:49,424 --> 00:04:51,625 Setting off my sprinklers, drenching my office, 128 00:04:51,626 --> 00:04:54,828 destroying a paper crane folded for me by Kevin. 129 00:04:54,829 --> 00:04:56,830 Right, I forgot how that ended. 130 00:04:56,831 --> 00:04:58,832 The point is, that was all just 131 00:04:58,833 --> 00:05:01,035 regular cop stuff. 132 00:05:01,036 --> 00:05:02,336 There's no way that can be the reason 133 00:05:02,337 --> 00:05:03,604 you've been in such a bad mood. 134 00:05:03,605 --> 00:05:05,406 Bad mood... I'm sorry, haven't I been bursting 135 00:05:05,407 --> 00:05:06,707 into song enough for you lately? 136 00:05:06,708 --> 00:05:08,108 Would you like me to click my heels together 137 00:05:08,109 --> 00:05:09,643 or skip like a schoolchild? 138 00:05:09,644 --> 00:05:11,211 Yes to all of that. 139 00:05:11,212 --> 00:05:13,747 But for reals, what non-me thing 140 00:05:13,748 --> 00:05:15,316 is bothering you? 141 00:05:15,317 --> 00:05:16,750 Is there trouble at home? 142 00:05:16,751 --> 00:05:19,386 Peralta, I'm not gonna discuss my home life with you. 143 00:05:19,387 --> 00:05:21,221 We're not friends. We're not family. 144 00:05:21,222 --> 00:05:22,323 You're not my husband. 145 00:05:22,324 --> 00:05:23,991 Oh, that's hurtful. 146 00:05:23,992 --> 00:05:25,659 I thought we had a special bond. 147 00:05:25,660 --> 00:05:27,194 I was your secret Santa last year. 148 00:05:27,195 --> 00:05:30,331 And I already thanked you for the "Who Farted?" baseball cap. 149 00:05:30,332 --> 00:05:31,799 But you never wear it. 150 00:05:31,800 --> 00:05:33,834 So Holt won't tell me if something happened at home 151 00:05:33,835 --> 00:05:35,002 because I'm not his husband. 152 00:05:35,003 --> 00:05:36,370 But you know who is his husband? 153 00:05:36,371 --> 00:05:37,504 - His husband. - His husband. 154 00:05:37,505 --> 00:05:38,772 I was just a little slow. 155 00:05:38,773 --> 00:05:40,207 Yeah, Kevin's not gonna talk to you 156 00:05:40,208 --> 00:05:41,642 'cause he can't stand detectives. 157 00:05:41,643 --> 00:05:44,845 Yes, but he can stand yous. 158 00:05:44,846 --> 00:05:47,481 Nuh-uh, I spent a lot of time cultivating 159 00:05:47,482 --> 00:05:49,350 a good relationship with Kevin. 160 00:05:49,351 --> 00:05:52,453 He finally calls me Gina instead of Ms. Linetti. 161 00:05:52,454 --> 00:05:54,888 All right, fine. Then I'm calling in my chit. 162 00:05:54,889 --> 00:05:56,624 You kiss your mother with that mouth? 163 00:05:56,625 --> 00:05:58,626 - No, ch-it. - What? 164 00:05:58,627 --> 00:05:59,927 Remember when I got you this job? 165 00:05:59,928 --> 00:06:03,664 You said, "OMG, Jake. I owe you one." 166 00:06:03,665 --> 00:06:05,232 I said "OMG"? 167 00:06:05,233 --> 00:06:07,234 That was before other people started saying it. 168 00:06:07,235 --> 00:06:08,569 I was an originator. 169 00:06:08,570 --> 00:06:09,904 You said I could ask for anything, 170 00:06:09,905 --> 00:06:12,573 and for six years, I've been sitting on that chit. 171 00:06:12,574 --> 00:06:17,912 Well, now I'm cashing it in. 172 00:06:17,913 --> 00:06:19,246 A receipt for almonds? 173 00:06:19,247 --> 00:06:20,915 Yeah, I just thought it would be more dramatic 174 00:06:20,916 --> 00:06:22,416 to slide something across the table. 175 00:06:22,417 --> 00:06:24,852 It wasn't, but since I made that promise, fine. 176 00:06:26,588 --> 00:06:29,223 Hey, Kevin. Gina, good to see you. 177 00:06:29,224 --> 00:06:32,059 - Jake's here too. - Yo. 178 00:06:35,418 --> 00:06:38,352 Gina, I know you like champagne with a drop of pomegranate juice. 179 00:06:38,354 --> 00:06:40,956 I like to say it's nature's classiest alcohol 180 00:06:40,957 --> 00:06:43,558 mixed with its narst-iest fruit. 181 00:06:43,559 --> 00:06:45,026 And, Peralta, I hope this will do. 182 00:06:45,027 --> 00:06:46,194 It's a can of orange soda 183 00:06:46,195 --> 00:06:47,763 from when some other children visited. 184 00:06:47,764 --> 00:06:50,365 It's perfect. Thank you for inviting us in. 185 00:06:50,366 --> 00:06:53,301 Yes, I invited Gina in. You were with her. 186 00:06:53,302 --> 00:06:54,836 Okay. 187 00:06:54,837 --> 00:06:57,239 Look, everyone's blaming me for the captain's horrible mood 188 00:06:57,240 --> 00:06:59,478 because of a small thing that happened Wednesday morning. 189 00:06:59,480 --> 00:07:01,109 When you flooded his office with cider? 190 00:07:01,110 --> 00:07:02,978 Well, the water actually flooded it. 191 00:07:02,979 --> 00:07:04,246 The cider just caused it. 192 00:07:04,247 --> 00:07:06,748 But I swear he was already upset when he got to work. 193 00:07:06,749 --> 00:07:08,517 He was anger articulating. 194 00:07:08,518 --> 00:07:10,919 Coat, coat, jacket, coat. 195 00:07:10,920 --> 00:07:15,123 Is this a police precinct or a Turkish bazaar? 196 00:07:15,124 --> 00:07:17,993 Mm, yes, I dread those annunciated denunciations. 197 00:07:17,994 --> 00:07:20,262 Yeah, I hate those de-bunce-ebations... 198 00:07:20,263 --> 00:07:22,097 But so my question is, 199 00:07:22,098 --> 00:07:23,732 could something have happened at home 200 00:07:23,733 --> 00:07:25,067 before he left for work? 201 00:07:25,068 --> 00:07:26,535 Well, I remember that morning. 202 00:07:26,536 --> 00:07:29,204 He left this house at 7:00 and was in a great mood. 203 00:07:29,205 --> 00:07:30,439 In fact, he was still chuckling 204 00:07:30,440 --> 00:07:32,040 about the previous night's Charlie Rose. 205 00:07:32,041 --> 00:07:34,176 Fine, so your marriage might not be the problem, 206 00:07:34,177 --> 00:07:36,011 but he didn't get to work until 10:00. 207 00:07:36,012 --> 00:07:37,446 That means whatever ruined his mood 208 00:07:37,447 --> 00:07:38,747 happened in those three hours. 209 00:07:38,748 --> 00:07:40,115 We have to retrace his steps. 210 00:07:40,116 --> 00:07:41,250 We? 211 00:07:41,251 --> 00:07:43,018 I'm not going to investigate my own husband. 212 00:07:43,019 --> 00:07:44,019 Uh-huh, totally. 213 00:07:44,020 --> 00:07:45,654 Well, that was a great chitchat. 214 00:07:45,655 --> 00:07:46,722 Don't you think, Gina? 215 00:07:46,723 --> 00:07:48,790 Seemed like it went real bad for you. 216 00:07:48,791 --> 00:07:50,092 Chit-chat. 217 00:07:50,093 --> 00:07:51,393 Oh. 218 00:07:51,394 --> 00:07:53,195 You know, Kevin, maybe if we figure out 219 00:07:53,196 --> 00:07:56,198 what caused Raymond's bad mood, we could fix it. 220 00:07:56,199 --> 00:07:57,799 Good idea, Gina. 221 00:07:57,800 --> 00:08:00,335 I suppose we could look into it. 222 00:08:00,336 --> 00:08:01,803 Yes, great! Let's go right now. 223 00:08:01,804 --> 00:08:03,805 No time to lose. Don't look, just run. 224 00:08:03,806 --> 00:08:05,607 You're trying to get me out of here before I see 225 00:08:05,608 --> 00:08:07,009 the orange soda you spilled on the chair, aren't you? 226 00:08:07,010 --> 00:08:10,579 I'm already out the door. It worked! 227 00:08:10,580 --> 00:08:12,014 What the hell? 228 00:08:12,015 --> 00:08:14,716 Are you throwing a tea party for this monster? 229 00:08:14,717 --> 00:08:17,319 He was sitting in processing, and he just looked so lonely. 230 00:08:17,320 --> 00:08:18,320 This guy is guilty. 231 00:08:18,321 --> 00:08:19,454 He confessed to me, 232 00:08:19,455 --> 00:08:20,956 but now he's pretending that he didn't. 233 00:08:20,957 --> 00:08:22,424 You must have misheard me. 234 00:08:22,425 --> 00:08:24,059 I didn't do anything, 235 00:08:24,060 --> 00:08:27,462 except being charmed by these two lovely ladies. 236 00:08:27,463 --> 00:08:29,832 Oh, cut it with the sweet-old-coot routine. 237 00:08:29,833 --> 00:08:31,633 You're going to jail, my friend, 238 00:08:31,634 --> 00:08:33,402 in a trolley named Charles. 239 00:08:33,403 --> 00:08:34,703 - A trolley? - Trolleys are cool. 240 00:08:34,704 --> 00:08:36,605 They have the bells. You know what? 241 00:08:36,606 --> 00:08:39,308 Just take your tea and leave my perp alone, please. 242 00:08:39,309 --> 00:08:42,511 Thank you, ladies, for bringing a little sunshine 243 00:08:42,512 --> 00:08:44,079 into my gray life. 244 00:08:48,551 --> 00:08:50,185 You want to know what I'm gonna do 245 00:08:50,186 --> 00:08:51,753 with the money I stole? 246 00:08:51,754 --> 00:08:53,989 - Hmm. - Prostitutes. 247 00:08:53,990 --> 00:08:55,257 Huh! 248 00:08:55,258 --> 00:08:57,259 Amy, you heard him. Tell me you heard him. 249 00:08:57,260 --> 00:08:59,595 - What? - Son of a bitch! 250 00:08:59,596 --> 00:09:02,164 Well, this is where Raymond eats breakfast every morning. 251 00:09:02,165 --> 00:09:06,101 Yes, I know. He's always raving about how they don't have specials. 252 00:09:06,102 --> 00:09:08,070 Diane, hello, this is my friend Gina, 253 00:09:08,071 --> 00:09:09,571 and this is Detective Peralta. 254 00:09:09,572 --> 00:09:10,939 They work with my Raymond. 255 00:09:10,940 --> 00:09:14,777 Oh, Peralta, you are so old to behave the way you do. 256 00:09:14,778 --> 00:09:16,245 - Oof. - What? 257 00:09:16,246 --> 00:09:18,514 I'm sure he vents about everyone on the squad. 258 00:09:18,515 --> 00:09:19,748 Nope, just you. 259 00:09:19,749 --> 00:09:22,184 Damn it, Diane, what are you doing after this? 260 00:09:22,185 --> 00:09:23,652 So did anything unusual happen 261 00:09:23,653 --> 00:09:25,521 when Raymond was here last Wednesday? 262 00:09:25,522 --> 00:09:26,755 Did he mention anything? 263 00:09:26,756 --> 00:09:28,390 No, he had his regular breakfast: 264 00:09:28,391 --> 00:09:31,093 room-temperature water and one hard-boiled egg yolk. 265 00:09:31,094 --> 00:09:34,263 Hmm, well, that is his good-mood food. 266 00:09:34,264 --> 00:09:36,298 So, Peralta, we know he was fine through breakfast. 267 00:09:36,299 --> 00:09:37,733 Looks like you're still on the hook. 268 00:09:37,734 --> 00:09:39,068 No, there was still plenty of time 269 00:09:39,069 --> 00:09:40,069 before he got to work. 270 00:09:40,070 --> 00:09:41,070 Gina, what'd he do next? 271 00:09:41,071 --> 00:09:42,604 Well, according to his sched, 272 00:09:42,605 --> 00:09:45,441 his next stop was his weekly painting class. 273 00:09:45,442 --> 00:09:47,009 Painting class? 274 00:09:47,010 --> 00:09:48,277 Can I guess what he paints? 275 00:09:48,278 --> 00:09:49,878 Pictures of pie charts. 276 00:09:49,879 --> 00:09:51,847 Multiple still lifes of this gray rock. 277 00:09:51,848 --> 00:09:53,282 That's even more boring. 278 00:09:53,283 --> 00:09:55,684 So, Gerald, did anything happen to Raymond last week? 279 00:09:55,685 --> 00:09:56,819 Did he seem like something 280 00:09:56,820 --> 00:09:58,887 or someone had him in a bad mood? 281 00:09:58,888 --> 00:10:00,122 It was his day to pick the music, 282 00:10:00,123 --> 00:10:01,156 and he chose Haydn. 283 00:10:01,157 --> 00:10:02,991 So he was in a good mood or a bad mood? 284 00:10:02,992 --> 00:10:04,993 A great mood, Jake. 285 00:10:04,994 --> 00:10:05,994 Oh, you're Jake. 286 00:10:05,995 --> 00:10:07,096 Damn it. 287 00:10:07,097 --> 00:10:08,964 What are you doing after this, Gerald? 288 00:10:10,900 --> 00:10:12,901 What is wrong with our Internet? 289 00:10:12,902 --> 00:10:15,537 I like to back up my data every 15 minutes, 290 00:10:15,538 --> 00:10:18,107 and it's taking 17 minutes per backup! 291 00:10:18,108 --> 00:10:19,942 I'm in a data backup deficit. 292 00:10:19,943 --> 00:10:21,610 We are in the same boat. 293 00:10:21,611 --> 00:10:23,445 I've been trying to load this video all day. 294 00:10:23,446 --> 00:10:25,414 You're watching videos during work? 295 00:10:25,415 --> 00:10:27,516 I told him to do it, sir. It's case-related. 296 00:10:27,517 --> 00:10:29,018 "Turtle humps computer mouse." 297 00:10:29,019 --> 00:10:32,021 Yeah, Turtle's the name of a local pervert 298 00:10:32,022 --> 00:10:34,023 we're chasing. 299 00:10:40,330 --> 00:10:43,799 Come on, Hitchcock. Get it together. 300 00:10:43,800 --> 00:10:45,768 So did anything strange happen 301 00:10:45,769 --> 00:10:47,369 when you and Raymond sparred last week? 302 00:10:47,370 --> 00:10:48,837 No, as usual, 303 00:10:48,838 --> 00:10:50,673 Raymond was the king of the croisé, 304 00:10:50,674 --> 00:10:52,841 and I got in a few good raddoppios. 305 00:10:52,842 --> 00:10:54,343 So just a bunch of normal words. 306 00:10:54,344 --> 00:10:56,979 Are you sure we're talking about last Wednesday? 307 00:10:56,980 --> 00:11:00,449 Positive. Haven't seen him since. 308 00:11:00,450 --> 00:11:01,483 You haven't? 309 00:11:01,484 --> 00:11:04,019 Mm-mm. 310 00:11:04,020 --> 00:11:05,187 I'm sorry. I need to leave. 311 00:11:05,188 --> 00:11:06,588 Excuse me. 312 00:11:08,258 --> 00:11:10,526 Kevin. Kev. 313 00:11:10,527 --> 00:11:11,961 What's going on? 314 00:11:11,962 --> 00:11:13,395 Raymond has been lying to me. 315 00:11:13,396 --> 00:11:14,563 Three mornings this week, 316 00:11:14,564 --> 00:11:16,398 he told me he was fencing with Dan. 317 00:11:16,399 --> 00:11:18,467 Why would he do that? Why would he lie to me? 318 00:11:18,468 --> 00:11:19,501 I don't know. 319 00:11:19,502 --> 00:11:20,970 Maybe it's connected to his bad mood. 320 00:11:20,971 --> 00:11:22,838 My husband does not lie to me. 321 00:11:22,839 --> 00:11:24,540 This investigation of yours was a bad idea. 322 00:11:24,541 --> 00:11:25,541 I'm going home. 323 00:11:25,542 --> 00:11:26,976 I have to sort this out with Raymond. 324 00:11:26,977 --> 00:11:29,378 Good-bye, Peralta. Linetti. 325 00:11:29,379 --> 00:11:32,982 Linetti? No. 326 00:11:32,983 --> 00:11:34,883 We were on a first-name basis. 327 00:11:34,884 --> 00:11:36,418 Gina, this is bad. 328 00:11:36,419 --> 00:11:38,220 Kevin's upset. Holt's gonna be angry. 329 00:11:38,221 --> 00:11:39,321 We're both gonna get fired, 330 00:11:39,322 --> 00:11:40,522 and I'm gonna die alone. 331 00:11:40,523 --> 00:11:42,191 Jake, why don't you just do the right thing 332 00:11:42,192 --> 00:11:43,192 and jump out a window? 333 00:11:43,193 --> 00:11:44,526 Captain Holt will never fire me 334 00:11:44,527 --> 00:11:46,996 if he knows I'm mourning the death of a close friend. 335 00:11:46,997 --> 00:11:49,531 Or we could try plan B and just fix it. 336 00:11:49,532 --> 00:11:52,134 You never even tried plan A, though. 337 00:11:55,249 --> 00:11:56,750 Hey, how'd it go with Kevin? 338 00:11:56,751 --> 00:11:58,591 Are you willing to admit everything's your fault? 339 00:11:58,644 --> 00:12:01,012 No, Amy, because none of this is my fault. 340 00:12:01,022 --> 00:12:03,757 Except for how you meddled in the captain's life today, 341 00:12:03,758 --> 00:12:05,225 possibly causing repercussions 342 00:12:05,226 --> 00:12:07,627 in his marriage that could last a lifetime. 343 00:12:07,628 --> 00:12:09,563 Yes, that is completely on me, 344 00:12:09,564 --> 00:12:11,731 but, Amy, you didn't know that, so you were still wrong. 345 00:12:11,732 --> 00:12:13,066 You two need to go. 346 00:12:13,067 --> 00:12:14,301 You're not supposed to be here, 347 00:12:14,302 --> 00:12:16,036 and the captain's at a new level of anger: 348 00:12:16,037 --> 00:12:17,637 constant smiling. 349 00:12:19,207 --> 00:12:20,307 It's horrible. 350 00:12:20,308 --> 00:12:23,143 All smiling's horrible. This is worse. 351 00:12:23,144 --> 00:12:25,245 We're here so I can activate 352 00:12:25,246 --> 00:12:27,914 the Holy Network of Administrative Assistants, 353 00:12:27,915 --> 00:12:29,816 acronym HNAA. 354 00:12:29,817 --> 00:12:31,685 We high-level assistants keep track 355 00:12:31,686 --> 00:12:34,588 of what's going on with all the bosses. 356 00:12:34,589 --> 00:12:35,655 Jealous, Amy? 357 00:12:35,656 --> 00:12:38,859 Yeah, I'd tap that. 358 00:12:38,860 --> 00:12:40,527 Network. I'd tap that network. 359 00:12:40,528 --> 00:12:41,761 That's a thing people say. 360 00:12:41,762 --> 00:12:43,196 Yeah? No. 361 00:12:43,197 --> 00:12:46,666 I've answered all your questions, young man. 362 00:12:46,667 --> 00:12:48,935 What more do you want from me? 363 00:12:48,936 --> 00:12:51,938 I'd like you tell Santiago about the banks you robbed 364 00:12:51,939 --> 00:12:54,174 and how you get off on violence. 365 00:12:54,175 --> 00:12:57,244 What? Boyle, oh, my God. 366 00:13:02,216 --> 00:13:03,250 What are you doing? 367 00:13:03,251 --> 00:13:05,452 Why are you being so weird about this? 368 00:13:05,453 --> 00:13:06,720 Marvin Miller is guilty, 369 00:13:06,721 --> 00:13:08,188 and he thinks he can get away with it. 370 00:13:08,189 --> 00:13:10,590 He also thinks the subway should be horses. 371 00:13:10,591 --> 00:13:11,992 He's old, is what I'm saying. 372 00:13:11,993 --> 00:13:14,194 He knows exactly what he's doing. 373 00:13:14,195 --> 00:13:15,595 He's messing with me 374 00:13:15,596 --> 00:13:17,430 because I'm not intimidating like Terry 375 00:13:17,431 --> 00:13:19,666 or dignified like Jake or model-handsome like Jake 376 00:13:19,667 --> 00:13:21,601 or funny like Jake. 377 00:13:21,602 --> 00:13:24,337 Yeah, I might buy my shoes at a kids store, 378 00:13:24,338 --> 00:13:26,806 and, yeah, I might be scared of geese, 379 00:13:26,807 --> 00:13:28,375 but I am a damn good cop, 380 00:13:28,376 --> 00:13:30,076 and I will not be made a fool of. 381 00:13:30,077 --> 00:13:32,112 So I'm gonna go into that room, 382 00:13:32,113 --> 00:13:34,181 and I'm gonna get that lousy old geezer 383 00:13:34,182 --> 00:13:37,117 to admit on camera that he robbed those banks. 384 00:13:37,118 --> 00:13:39,052 He just died. 385 00:13:39,053 --> 00:13:41,121 What? 386 00:13:45,159 --> 00:13:46,960 Okay, here's what I learned. 387 00:13:46,961 --> 00:13:50,664 The chief's assistant, Ryan, was only pretending to have Mono. 388 00:13:50,665 --> 00:13:53,233 - Okay, Gina, about Holt. - Fine. 389 00:13:53,234 --> 00:13:55,635 Apparently he was supposed to meet 390 00:13:55,636 --> 00:13:59,172 Deputy Chief Ash near his fencing club at 9:30, 391 00:13:59,173 --> 00:14:01,508 but he canceled at the very last minute 392 00:14:01,509 --> 00:14:03,443 with no explanation. 393 00:14:03,444 --> 00:14:05,245 HNAA does it again. 394 00:14:05,246 --> 00:14:07,514 Okay, so something happened between fencing and coffee. 395 00:14:07,515 --> 00:14:08,748 We just have to figure out what. 396 00:14:08,749 --> 00:14:11,117 Totes, but first, let's check in with Ryan 397 00:14:11,118 --> 00:14:13,987 on how to fake mono, 'cause if I can nail that... 398 00:14:13,988 --> 00:14:16,623 Ooh, game changer. 399 00:14:16,624 --> 00:14:20,794 Okay, so Captain Holt leaves fencing and heads north. 400 00:14:20,795 --> 00:14:21,895 If we really want to do this, 401 00:14:21,896 --> 00:14:23,196 we got to get in his head. 402 00:14:23,197 --> 00:14:26,099 We have to be Captain Holt. 403 00:14:26,100 --> 00:14:27,868 Hello, Gina. 404 00:14:27,869 --> 00:14:29,436 How does this sound? 405 00:14:29,437 --> 00:14:31,805 Captain Holt, is that you? 406 00:14:31,806 --> 00:14:35,108 Oh, no, it's Jake nailing your voice exactly. 407 00:14:35,109 --> 00:14:36,109 Right? 408 00:14:36,110 --> 00:14:37,344 The trick is to find a key phrase 409 00:14:37,345 --> 00:14:38,879 you know exactly how he'd say. 410 00:14:38,880 --> 00:14:41,615 Mine is, "Peralta, that's enough." 411 00:14:41,616 --> 00:14:43,450 Seriously, Jake, this is getting scary. 412 00:14:44,919 --> 00:14:47,254 Come with me, young, wise assistant. 413 00:14:47,255 --> 00:14:49,289 Let us walk in this direction. 414 00:14:49,290 --> 00:14:52,726 Oh, a hot dog. Would I stop? 415 00:14:52,727 --> 00:14:54,928 Not for one of those, I wouldn't. 416 00:14:54,929 --> 00:14:56,563 Damn it, it's morphing into British. 417 00:14:56,564 --> 00:14:57,664 Do your catchphrase. 418 00:14:57,665 --> 00:14:59,266 Peralta, that's enough! 419 00:14:59,267 --> 00:15:02,736 And I'm walking with purpose. And I'm walking with purpose. 420 00:15:02,737 --> 00:15:04,971 And bingo. 421 00:15:04,972 --> 00:15:06,206 A door. 422 00:15:06,207 --> 00:15:08,241 It's a Narnia situation. 423 00:15:08,242 --> 00:15:10,243 No, but I love that. 424 00:15:10,244 --> 00:15:11,645 It's a security camera. 425 00:15:11,646 --> 00:15:13,447 If something happened to Holt when he walked past here, 426 00:15:13,448 --> 00:15:14,848 we'll be able to see it. 427 00:15:14,849 --> 00:15:17,150 Peralta, you genius. 428 00:15:17,151 --> 00:15:21,021 Mm, that does not sound like him. 429 00:15:21,022 --> 00:15:23,123 Okay, personal photos are down, 430 00:15:23,124 --> 00:15:24,257 kitchen is spotless, 431 00:15:24,258 --> 00:15:27,160 and I got the silver-painted break-dancer outside 432 00:15:27,161 --> 00:15:29,696 to move his very loud boom box elsewhere. 433 00:15:33,935 --> 00:15:36,603 - You beat him in a dance-off? - No, I destroyed him. 434 00:15:36,604 --> 00:15:40,040 There's absolutely nothing here that will set off Holt. 435 00:15:40,041 --> 00:15:42,142 Oh, oh! 436 00:15:42,143 --> 00:15:44,377 I was trying to cook my oatmeal with a road flare, 437 00:15:44,378 --> 00:15:45,378 but it caught on fire. 438 00:15:45,379 --> 00:15:47,247 Why are you using a road flare? 439 00:15:47,248 --> 00:15:49,249 You said the kitchen was off-limits. 440 00:15:49,250 --> 00:15:50,617 Yeah, this is your fault, Sarge. 441 00:15:50,618 --> 00:15:52,085 Give me that. 442 00:15:55,490 --> 00:15:58,391 I'm just holding a road flare, 443 00:15:58,392 --> 00:16:00,060 stepping on some oatmeal. 444 00:16:00,061 --> 00:16:01,461 Just doing me. 445 00:16:01,462 --> 00:16:03,330 I can't believe that you, of all people, 446 00:16:03,331 --> 00:16:05,132 are my biggest problem today, Jeffords. 447 00:16:07,935 --> 00:16:10,065 - Kevin, is the captain home? - No. 448 00:16:10,067 --> 00:16:11,837 Good, I figured out what happened to him. 449 00:16:11,839 --> 00:16:14,174 - He was mugged. - What? 450 00:16:14,175 --> 00:16:15,208 He told you this? 451 00:16:15,209 --> 00:16:16,810 No, I used my detective skills 452 00:16:16,811 --> 00:16:19,379 as well as my spot-on Holt impression to figure it out. 453 00:16:19,380 --> 00:16:22,082 I retraced his steps and found security footage. 454 00:16:22,083 --> 00:16:23,216 After he left fencing, 455 00:16:23,217 --> 00:16:25,085 three shady guys followed him into an alley. 456 00:16:25,086 --> 00:16:26,486 One of them had a knife. 457 00:16:26,487 --> 00:16:28,021 That's why he's been in such a bad mood. 458 00:16:28,022 --> 00:16:29,222 He's a police captain that got mugged. 459 00:16:29,223 --> 00:16:30,557 He's embarrassed. 460 00:16:30,558 --> 00:16:31,725 Oh, my goodness. 461 00:16:31,726 --> 00:16:32,959 - Peralta. - There he is. 462 00:16:32,960 --> 00:16:34,161 What are you doing in my house? 463 00:16:34,162 --> 00:16:37,364 - Raymond, you were mugged? - What? 464 00:16:37,365 --> 00:16:38,598 What did you say to him? 465 00:16:38,599 --> 00:16:39,800 Captain, it's okay. 466 00:16:39,801 --> 00:16:41,401 There's nothing to be embarrassed about. 467 00:16:41,402 --> 00:16:43,003 I'm not embarrassed, and I wasn't mugged. 468 00:16:43,004 --> 00:16:45,238 Three men tried to mug me, but I fought them off, 469 00:16:45,239 --> 00:16:46,673 injuring two of them. 470 00:16:49,644 --> 00:16:51,912 Wait, so you heroically fought off three guys, 471 00:16:51,913 --> 00:16:53,613 and that put you in a bad mood? 472 00:16:53,614 --> 00:16:56,249 If I did that, I would literally write a song about myself. 473 00:16:56,250 --> 00:16:57,250 It would be like... 474 00:16:57,251 --> 00:16:58,852 ♪ Jake the hero ♪ 475 00:16:58,853 --> 00:17:00,120 ♪ Abs of steel ♪ 476 00:17:00,121 --> 00:17:01,488 ♪ Sha-la, la-la ♪ 477 00:17:01,489 --> 00:17:02,956 Why would you keep this from me, 478 00:17:02,957 --> 00:17:04,725 and why would you lie about going to fencing? 479 00:17:04,726 --> 00:17:08,128 Because he couldn't go, because he's injured. 480 00:17:08,129 --> 00:17:10,197 I wasn't injured. I was lightly stabbed. 481 00:17:10,198 --> 00:17:12,499 I'm sorry. You were stabbed? 482 00:17:12,500 --> 00:17:15,902 Lightly stabbed. I didn't want to frighten you. 483 00:17:15,903 --> 00:17:17,170 You are my husband. 484 00:17:17,171 --> 00:17:18,905 I want you to tell me everything, 485 00:17:18,906 --> 00:17:20,607 especially things that might frighten me. 486 00:17:20,608 --> 00:17:21,608 How can you not know that? 487 00:17:21,609 --> 00:17:24,978 Raymond, you are unbelievable. 488 00:17:27,348 --> 00:17:30,350 Hey, Captain, you look so tall. 489 00:17:30,351 --> 00:17:33,053 What you have done is beyond unprofessional. 490 00:17:33,054 --> 00:17:36,390 You cannot muck around in people's private lives. 491 00:17:36,391 --> 00:17:39,292 Get out of my house. 492 00:17:39,293 --> 00:17:43,130 But get into your car? I'll go. 493 00:17:48,844 --> 00:17:51,512 - Sir. - Detective. 494 00:17:51,513 --> 00:17:54,681 So how was your night? Of work. 495 00:17:54,683 --> 00:17:56,117 I'm not asking about your personal life. 496 00:17:56,118 --> 00:17:57,551 I don't care about you personally. 497 00:17:57,552 --> 00:17:59,921 I mean, I'm neutral. I mean, who are you? 498 00:17:59,922 --> 00:18:02,557 Floundering is worse than silence. 499 00:18:02,558 --> 00:18:04,458 Oh, cool. Cool, cool, cool, cool. 500 00:18:04,459 --> 00:18:06,761 Cool, cool, no doubt. No doubt, no doubt. 501 00:18:08,530 --> 00:18:10,431 Man, this elevator's slow, huh? 502 00:18:10,432 --> 00:18:12,433 That's because you haven't pressed the button. 503 00:18:14,536 --> 00:18:16,003 That's why you're the captain. 504 00:18:17,005 --> 00:18:18,139 So smart. 505 00:18:18,140 --> 00:18:22,276 I'm gonna just... zip. 506 00:18:22,277 --> 00:18:24,445 No more talk-y. Hmm. 507 00:18:31,553 --> 00:18:34,855 Eek, blast of cold air coming out of that box. 508 00:18:34,856 --> 00:18:36,324 Name of Amy's sex tape. 509 00:18:36,325 --> 00:18:38,392 Hey, man, come on. Not cool. 510 00:18:38,393 --> 00:18:40,795 I'm going through something. Just let me have this one. 511 00:18:40,796 --> 00:18:42,864 I'm sorry you wasted your chit, Jake. 512 00:18:42,865 --> 00:18:44,098 It's all right. 513 00:18:44,099 --> 00:18:46,100 I want to apologize to Holt, but it seems personal, 514 00:18:46,101 --> 00:18:47,702 and I'm not supposed to talk to him about personal stuff. 515 00:18:47,703 --> 00:18:50,972 Oh, boo, I guess you need to think of some professional way 516 00:18:50,973 --> 00:18:52,173 to make it up to him. 517 00:18:52,174 --> 00:18:54,809 Wait a minute. Gina, that's it. 518 00:18:54,810 --> 00:18:56,711 I just had an idea. 519 00:18:56,712 --> 00:18:59,513 Peralta, you're a genius. 520 00:18:59,514 --> 00:19:00,982 Who was that, ScarJo? 521 00:19:00,983 --> 00:19:02,650 It was Holt, and I think you know that. 522 00:19:02,651 --> 00:19:04,852 I thought it was ScarJo. 523 00:19:06,322 --> 00:19:08,189 I can't believe that bastard beat me. 524 00:19:08,190 --> 00:19:09,591 Whoa, he's dead. 525 00:19:09,592 --> 00:19:11,659 It's kind of hard to see how he's the winner in this. 526 00:19:11,660 --> 00:19:12,827 He made me look like an idiot. 527 00:19:12,828 --> 00:19:14,128 No, Amy and I were the idiots, 528 00:19:14,129 --> 00:19:16,764 because we let that ancient windbag fool us. 529 00:19:16,765 --> 00:19:18,199 He robbed the banks. 530 00:19:18,200 --> 00:19:20,034 He gave me money for the ginger ale. 531 00:19:20,035 --> 00:19:21,836 After you insisted he was guilty, 532 00:19:21,837 --> 00:19:23,538 I went back and checked his dollar. 533 00:19:23,539 --> 00:19:25,740 Serial numbers match the stolen bills. 534 00:19:25,741 --> 00:19:27,575 You brought in the right guy. 535 00:19:27,576 --> 00:19:28,810 You're a damn good cop, Boyle. 536 00:19:28,811 --> 00:19:30,411 I know. No one listens. 537 00:19:30,412 --> 00:19:32,280 Except when you threw water in his dead face. 538 00:19:32,281 --> 00:19:33,314 That was rough. 539 00:19:33,315 --> 00:19:34,549 I thought he was faking it. 540 00:19:34,550 --> 00:19:37,151 I wanted to splash the lies out of him. 541 00:19:40,489 --> 00:19:42,323 All right, Detective, what's this all about? 542 00:19:42,324 --> 00:19:44,559 - You have 70 seconds. - Why 70? 543 00:19:44,560 --> 00:19:45,994 Do you really want to waste your time 544 00:19:45,995 --> 00:19:47,195 while I explain my algorithm? 545 00:19:47,196 --> 00:19:48,630 Right, all right, so I pulled a still 546 00:19:48,631 --> 00:19:50,398 from the security footage of your attempted mugging 547 00:19:50,399 --> 00:19:51,866 and sent it to the nearby precincts. 548 00:19:51,867 --> 00:19:54,903 We ID'd one of the mopes, and that's his apartment. 549 00:19:54,904 --> 00:19:56,971 I thought maybe you would want to do the honors. 550 00:19:56,972 --> 00:19:59,274 And you think this will make everything you did better? 551 00:19:59,275 --> 00:20:02,243 Well, maybe. It was Gina's idea, so... 552 00:20:02,244 --> 00:20:05,580 - It will. - Gina had nothing to do with it. 553 00:20:05,581 --> 00:20:07,815 You want to know why I was so angry all week? 554 00:20:07,816 --> 00:20:10,985 When those men came at me, I acted like I was a 20-year-old. 555 00:20:10,986 --> 00:20:14,088 I took a stupid risk, and I got myself stabbed. 556 00:20:14,089 --> 00:20:15,456 I was in pain 557 00:20:15,457 --> 00:20:18,726 and frustrated about lying to the man I love. 558 00:20:18,727 --> 00:20:20,762 - Kevin. - Yes. 559 00:20:20,763 --> 00:20:22,597 - Obviously Kevin. - Obviously. 560 00:20:22,598 --> 00:20:26,067 What I'm trying to say is, you were right all along. 561 00:20:26,068 --> 00:20:27,068 I wasn't mad at you. 562 00:20:27,069 --> 00:20:28,069 I was mad at myself, 563 00:20:28,070 --> 00:20:31,973 and I took it out on the squad. 564 00:20:31,974 --> 00:20:35,210 Peralta, you're a genius. 565 00:20:35,211 --> 00:20:38,079 Oh, my God. You said it. 566 00:20:38,080 --> 00:20:39,514 I heard you practicing in the men's room. 567 00:20:39,515 --> 00:20:40,915 Yeah, that makes more sense. 568 00:20:40,916 --> 00:20:43,251 Attention, squad, quick announcement. 569 00:20:43,252 --> 00:20:44,652 Overtime is reinstated, 570 00:20:44,653 --> 00:20:47,388 and you are each allowed two personal photographs, 571 00:20:47,389 --> 00:20:49,324 two trinkets, and three assorted knickknacks. 572 00:20:49,325 --> 00:20:50,425 You know what? 573 00:20:50,426 --> 00:20:51,993 Just follow Sergeant Jeffords' lead. 574 00:20:51,994 --> 00:20:54,195 He always knows how to keep this place running smoothly. 575 00:20:54,196 --> 00:20:56,731 Nice, so rubber band balls are back. 576 00:20:56,732 --> 00:20:58,533 Oh, no, it's bad for the bands. 577 00:20:58,534 --> 00:21:00,602 Ah, Kevin. Let me just get my coat. 578 00:21:00,603 --> 00:21:03,338 Hello, Peralta. Gina. 579 00:21:03,339 --> 00:21:06,307 Oh, sweet lords of dance, thank you. 580 00:21:06,308 --> 00:21:08,276 We're back on a first-name basis. 581 00:21:08,277 --> 00:21:10,912 Kevin, I am unable and unwilling 582 00:21:10,913 --> 00:21:12,447 to discuss personal matters with you. 583 00:21:12,448 --> 00:21:13,948 I'm aware of that, yes. 584 00:21:13,949 --> 00:21:15,450 In any case, thank you for your help. 585 00:21:15,451 --> 00:21:18,453 I brought you both gifts: original Raymond Holts. 586 00:21:19,688 --> 00:21:21,222 I will treasure this painting of a rock 587 00:21:21,223 --> 00:21:22,524 for all times. 588 00:21:22,525 --> 00:21:25,627 Ah, Rock 59 and 367. 589 00:21:25,628 --> 00:21:26,995 Those are good rocks. 590 00:21:26,996 --> 00:21:29,798 367 paintings of one rock? 591 00:21:29,799 --> 00:21:31,623 This guy parties! 592 00:21:33,335 --> 00:21:35,303 Not a doctor. Shh.