1 00:00:00,178 --> 00:00:02,180 (THEME MUSIC PLAYING) 2 00:00:33,044 --> 00:00:34,295 FRY: This is awesome! 3 00:00:34,379 --> 00:00:35,880 I've been waiting a 1000 years 4 00:00:35,964 --> 00:00:37,632 to see a Beastie Boys show. 5 00:00:37,715 --> 00:00:39,092 Can I get anybody a beer? 6 00:00:39,175 --> 00:00:40,260 Sure. 7 00:00:44,764 --> 00:00:45,765 Ah... 8 00:00:45,849 --> 00:00:48,309 MAN: (ON SPEAKERS) Ladies and gentlemen, here to lay down 9 00:00:48,393 --> 00:00:52,564 some old, old, incredibly old school beats, 10 00:00:52,647 --> 00:00:55,567 the Beastie Boys! 11 00:00:55,650 --> 00:00:57,652 (WHEELS SQUEAKING) 12 00:00:58,069 --> 00:00:59,988 (CHEERING AND APPLAUSE) 13 00:01:00,113 --> 00:01:01,197 (UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING) 14 00:01:01,281 --> 00:01:04,659 (SINGING) Well, now, don't you tell me to smile 15 00:01:04,742 --> 00:01:06,870 You stick around I'll make it worth your while 16 00:01:06,953 --> 00:01:09,205 Like numbers beyond what you can dial 17 00:01:09,289 --> 00:01:11,541 Maybe it's because we're so versatile 18 00:01:11,624 --> 00:01:13,668 "Style, profile," I said 19 00:01:13,751 --> 00:01:16,004 It always brings me back When I hear, "Ooh, child" 20 00:01:16,087 --> 00:01:17,088 From the Hudson river... 21 00:01:17,171 --> 00:01:18,172 impressive. 22 00:01:18,256 --> 00:01:21,342 They're busting mad rhymes with an 80% success rate. 23 00:01:21,426 --> 00:01:23,803 I believe that qualifies as ill. 24 00:01:23,887 --> 00:01:25,972 At least from a technical standpoint. 25 00:01:26,055 --> 00:01:27,265 Will you guys shut up? 26 00:01:27,348 --> 00:01:28,474 I'm trying to look cool. 27 00:01:28,558 --> 00:01:29,893 (SINGING CONTINUES) 28 00:01:29,976 --> 00:01:31,978 -Tammy D gets biz on the crops -Crops 29 00:01:32,061 --> 00:01:34,022 Beastie Boys known to let the beat... 30 00:01:34,480 --> 00:01:36,232 Mm, drop? 31 00:01:36,316 --> 00:01:38,318 (GRUNTS) Ow! How's it going? 32 00:01:38,401 --> 00:01:40,195 Ow! Enjoying the show? 33 00:01:40,278 --> 00:01:41,279 OOH! OW! 34 00:01:41,362 --> 00:01:43,573 Don't forget to pick up a t-shirt. 35 00:01:43,656 --> 00:01:46,409 Wow, an old-fashioned mosh pit. 36 00:01:46,492 --> 00:01:47,493 Come on, guys. 37 00:01:47,577 --> 00:01:50,246 Tonight we're going to party like it's 1999... 38 00:01:50,330 --> 00:01:51,331 again. 39 00:01:51,414 --> 00:01:53,166 (SINGING CONTINUES) 40 00:01:53,625 --> 00:01:55,210 (GRUNTING) 41 00:01:58,755 --> 00:02:00,256 Ow! Hey, watch it! 42 00:02:01,132 --> 00:02:02,550 - (KARATE YELL) - (MEN GROAN) 43 00:02:06,304 --> 00:02:08,723 Man, these guys rock harder than ever. 44 00:02:08,806 --> 00:02:10,934 (SINGING OUT OF TUNE) Oh, my 45 00:02:11,017 --> 00:02:12,685 It's a mirage 46 00:02:12,769 --> 00:02:14,729 Telling you all it's a... 47 00:02:14,812 --> 00:02:18,942 Sabotage 48 00:02:19,025 --> 00:02:21,736 Sabotage, yeah 49 00:02:21,819 --> 00:02:23,029 Peace! We out! 50 00:02:23,112 --> 00:02:24,781 - (ALL CHEERING) - (WHEELS SQUEAKING) 51 00:02:25,156 --> 00:02:26,324 (WHISTLES) 52 00:02:31,162 --> 00:02:32,247 Hey, Bender. 53 00:02:32,330 --> 00:02:33,623 Hey, Fender. 54 00:02:33,706 --> 00:02:36,125 Man, I haven't seen you since high school. 55 00:02:36,209 --> 00:02:38,002 You still working at Jack in The Box? 56 00:02:38,086 --> 00:02:39,254 Not anymore, baby. 57 00:02:39,337 --> 00:02:40,713 I'm with the band. 58 00:02:42,966 --> 00:02:45,093 Oh-oh, yeah. 59 00:02:45,176 --> 00:02:46,427 Hey, fellas, hey. 60 00:02:46,511 --> 00:02:49,222 I want you to meet my friends, Bender, Fry, and Leela. 61 00:02:49,305 --> 00:02:52,350 You know, we're really not that interested in meeting them. 62 00:02:52,433 --> 00:02:54,644 Wow, I love you guys. 63 00:02:54,727 --> 00:02:55,895 Back in the 20th century, 64 00:02:55,979 --> 00:02:57,564 I had all five of your albums. 65 00:02:57,647 --> 00:03:00,316 That was a 1000 years ago. Now we got seven. 66 00:03:00,400 --> 00:03:02,694 Cool. Can I borrow the new ones? 67 00:03:02,777 --> 00:03:03,987 And a couple of blank tapes? 68 00:03:05,488 --> 00:03:07,949 Hey, Bender, why don't we ditch these organ sacks 69 00:03:08,032 --> 00:03:09,284 and hit the real party? 70 00:03:09,367 --> 00:03:12,203 Count me in. I'm going to drink till I reboot. 71 00:03:13,204 --> 00:03:14,289 (DOOR BUZZES) 72 00:03:14,789 --> 00:03:16,791 (ELECTRICAL CRACKLING) 73 00:03:19,252 --> 00:03:21,504 Hey, what kind of party is this? 74 00:03:21,588 --> 00:03:23,756 There's no booze and only one hooker. 75 00:03:23,840 --> 00:03:25,466 Don't be a drag, man. 76 00:03:25,550 --> 00:03:26,968 We're jacking on. 77 00:03:29,929 --> 00:03:33,016 O-o-o-h, y-y-yeah! 78 00:03:33,099 --> 00:03:34,142 Want a jolt? 79 00:03:34,225 --> 00:03:36,019 Uh, hey, I'm no square, 80 00:03:36,102 --> 00:03:37,562 but isn't that counter-indicated 81 00:03:37,645 --> 00:03:38,980 by my operations manual? 82 00:03:39,063 --> 00:03:40,899 (ALL LAUGHING) 83 00:03:42,609 --> 00:03:44,277 Come on, Bender. Grab a jack. 84 00:03:44,360 --> 00:03:45,820 I told these guys you were cool. 85 00:03:46,321 --> 00:03:50,200 Well, if jacking on will make strangers think I'm cool, 86 00:03:50,283 --> 00:03:51,492 I'll do it. 87 00:03:53,494 --> 00:03:55,705 Whoa! (BLUBBERING) 88 00:03:56,581 --> 00:03:58,583 (PSYCHEDELIC SITAR MUSIC PLAYING) 89 00:04:03,338 --> 00:04:05,340 (SWALLOWING SOUNDS) 90 00:04:07,759 --> 00:04:08,968 Mmm! 91 00:04:11,846 --> 00:04:13,264 (GIGGLING) 92 00:04:17,352 --> 00:04:19,479 (DISTORTED GIGGLING) 93 00:04:19,562 --> 00:04:21,397 (BLUBBERING) 94 00:04:24,025 --> 00:04:26,611 Easy, baby, you don't want to get hooked on this stuff. 95 00:04:26,694 --> 00:04:30,573 Ah, no need to worry. I don't have an addictive personality. 96 00:04:32,367 --> 00:04:33,952 (GLASS SHATTERS) 97 00:04:34,035 --> 00:04:36,120 (BLUBBERING) 98 00:04:38,456 --> 00:04:41,501 Hey, uh, Bender, what are we doing in this bad neighborhood? 99 00:04:41,584 --> 00:04:43,253 Shut up, Square! 100 00:04:46,464 --> 00:04:48,049 I'll just be a minute. 101 00:04:49,217 --> 00:04:51,052 (WHISTLING) 102 00:04:54,973 --> 00:04:56,808 (GROANING) 103 00:05:01,771 --> 00:05:03,064 Wretched sinner unit. 104 00:05:03,147 --> 00:05:05,775 The path to robot heaven lies here, 105 00:05:05,859 --> 00:05:07,986 in the good book 3.0. 106 00:05:08,069 --> 00:05:09,779 Hey, do I preach to you 107 00:05:09,863 --> 00:05:12,657 when you're lying stoned in the gutter? 108 00:05:12,740 --> 00:05:14,117 No. 109 00:05:14,200 --> 00:05:15,285 So beat it! 110 00:05:16,160 --> 00:05:17,245 Tsk-tsk-tsk. 111 00:05:19,122 --> 00:05:20,331 Who was that guy? 112 00:05:20,415 --> 00:05:21,416 Your mama. 113 00:05:21,499 --> 00:05:23,418 Now shut up and drag me to work. 114 00:05:25,420 --> 00:05:27,547 (ALL GROANING) 115 00:05:29,632 --> 00:05:31,342 Our electric bill is climbing faster 116 00:05:31,426 --> 00:05:32,927 than a green snake up a sugarcane. 117 00:05:33,011 --> 00:05:34,929 Obviously, someone 'round here 118 00:05:35,013 --> 00:05:37,098 been wasting a whole heap of juice. 119 00:05:37,182 --> 00:05:39,184 - Probably you. - Me? 120 00:05:41,019 --> 00:05:42,187 Good morning, Bender. 121 00:05:42,270 --> 00:05:44,898 None of your business! Get off my back! 122 00:05:46,566 --> 00:05:47,650 What's his problem? 123 00:05:47,734 --> 00:05:48,818 if I didn't know better, 124 00:05:48,902 --> 00:05:51,321 I'd almost think he was abusing electricity. 125 00:05:51,404 --> 00:05:52,655 Bender? No way. 126 00:05:52,739 --> 00:05:54,199 (ELECTRICAL CRACKLING) 127 00:05:54,282 --> 00:05:56,242 I definitely would have noticed something. 128 00:05:58,453 --> 00:06:01,748 Bender, why are you spending so much time in the bathroom? 129 00:06:01,831 --> 00:06:03,541 Are you jacking on in there? 130 00:06:03,625 --> 00:06:04,959 BENDER: No! Don't come in! 131 00:06:05,376 --> 00:06:07,086 Good news, everyone. 132 00:06:07,170 --> 00:06:09,714 Today you'll be delivering a crate of subpoenas 133 00:06:09,797 --> 00:06:12,508 to Sicily 8, the mob planet. 134 00:06:13,718 --> 00:06:16,095 All right, let's get to work! 135 00:06:16,179 --> 00:06:17,597 I'll be out in a second. 136 00:06:25,480 --> 00:06:28,525 I know Big Vinnie said he was giving me the kiss of death, 137 00:06:28,608 --> 00:06:30,693 but I still think he was gay. 138 00:06:30,777 --> 00:06:32,278 Did he use his tongue? 139 00:06:32,362 --> 00:06:33,446 A little. 140 00:06:34,447 --> 00:06:36,074 (BLUBBERING) 141 00:06:36,157 --> 00:06:39,661 - Are you okay, Bender? - None of your business! Get off my back! 142 00:06:39,744 --> 00:06:42,121 Uh-oh. There seems to be an electrical disturbance 143 00:06:42,205 --> 00:06:43,331 in the Coalsack Nebula. 144 00:06:43,414 --> 00:06:46,376 - A what kind of a disturbance? - Electrical. 145 00:06:46,459 --> 00:06:49,546 Anyway, it's going to take some careful piloting to avoid it. 146 00:06:53,132 --> 00:06:54,342 (GRUNTS) 147 00:06:55,134 --> 00:06:56,803 (GRUNTING) 148 00:06:58,847 --> 00:07:00,682 - (STRAINING) - (METAL CREAKING) 149 00:07:04,352 --> 00:07:06,729 (CRAZED LAUGHTER) 150 00:07:06,813 --> 00:07:07,939 We're out of control! 151 00:07:08,022 --> 00:07:09,816 We're heading straight into the electric field. 152 00:07:09,899 --> 00:07:11,985 FRY: What's happening? I feel weird. 153 00:07:15,321 --> 00:07:16,865 Come on, Universe, 154 00:07:16,948 --> 00:07:19,284 you big, mostly empty wuss! 155 00:07:19,367 --> 00:07:22,036 Give me all the juice you got! 156 00:07:22,745 --> 00:07:25,164 (BLUBBERING) 157 00:07:29,335 --> 00:07:31,254 Oh, Mama. 158 00:07:34,883 --> 00:07:37,302 (GROANING) 159 00:07:41,514 --> 00:07:43,016 (LOUD CRASH) 160 00:07:47,687 --> 00:07:48,897 WHAT? 161 00:07:49,439 --> 00:07:50,940 LEELA: Bender, we didn't mind 162 00:07:51,024 --> 00:07:52,859 your drinking or your kleptomania 163 00:07:52,942 --> 00:07:54,444 or your pornography ring. 164 00:07:54,527 --> 00:07:56,696 in fact, that's why we loved you. 165 00:07:56,779 --> 00:07:59,073 But this electricity abuse crossed the line. 166 00:07:59,157 --> 00:08:00,575 You almost killed us. 167 00:08:00,658 --> 00:08:02,911 FRY: And you made me feel like a jerk for trusting you. 168 00:08:03,369 --> 00:08:06,289 Just like when my friend Richie swore he wasn't taking drugs 169 00:08:06,372 --> 00:08:08,374 And then he sold me my mom's VCR. 170 00:08:08,458 --> 00:08:10,793 And then later, I found out he was taking drugs. 171 00:08:10,877 --> 00:08:13,588 You make me ashamed to be your friend. 172 00:08:14,005 --> 00:08:18,426 Oh, you're right. I'm a lost cause. 173 00:08:24,140 --> 00:08:25,975 (ELECTRICITY CRACKLING) 174 00:08:27,519 --> 00:08:29,938 (PIPE ORGAN MUSIC PLAYING) 175 00:08:33,316 --> 00:08:35,235 Maybe there's another way. 176 00:08:38,613 --> 00:08:41,574 Oh, yeah, that's the good stuff. 177 00:08:41,950 --> 00:08:43,034 (POWERS DOWN) 178 00:08:44,494 --> 00:08:46,246 What am I doing? 179 00:08:46,329 --> 00:08:48,748 What have I become? 180 00:08:49,207 --> 00:08:50,291 Huh? 181 00:08:51,793 --> 00:08:54,921 I see a lot of fancy robots here today 182 00:08:55,004 --> 00:08:57,382 made of real shiny metal. 183 00:08:57,465 --> 00:08:59,968 But that don't impress the Robot Devil, no, sir. 184 00:09:00,051 --> 00:09:02,136 - No, sir! - 'Cause if you're a sinner, 185 00:09:02,220 --> 00:09:05,473 He's going to plug his infernal modem in the wall, 186 00:09:05,557 --> 00:09:09,519 belching smoke and flame, and he's going to download you 187 00:09:09,602 --> 00:09:11,229 straight to robot hell. 188 00:09:11,312 --> 00:09:12,522 Straight to hell! 189 00:09:12,605 --> 00:09:14,107 So I ask you, 190 00:09:14,190 --> 00:09:16,901 "Who will stand up and be saved?" 191 00:09:16,985 --> 00:09:18,820 Who? Who? 192 00:09:20,864 --> 00:09:22,073 (GRUNTS) 193 00:09:23,366 --> 00:09:24,659 (WEAKLY) Me. 194 00:09:31,207 --> 00:09:32,959 And as a further cost-cutting measure, 195 00:09:33,042 --> 00:09:35,545 I have eliminated the saltwater cooler. 196 00:09:35,628 --> 00:09:37,005 This is a witch hunt. 197 00:09:37,088 --> 00:09:40,466 BENDER: (SINGING) Oh, what a beautiful morning 198 00:09:40,550 --> 00:09:43,720 Oh, what a beautiful day 199 00:09:43,803 --> 00:09:44,929 Greetings, friends. 200 00:09:45,013 --> 00:09:46,848 Don't we all look nice today? 201 00:09:46,931 --> 00:09:49,642 Great. He's whacked out on electricity again. 202 00:09:49,726 --> 00:09:51,936 No, I'm whacked out on life. 203 00:09:52,020 --> 00:09:55,857 My friends, I found religion. 204 00:09:57,692 --> 00:09:58,902 Religion? 205 00:09:58,985 --> 00:10:01,613 is this another scam to get free yarmuikes? 206 00:10:01,696 --> 00:10:03,239 Give him a break, Fry. 207 00:10:03,323 --> 00:10:04,991 if this helps Bender clean up his act, 208 00:10:05,074 --> 00:10:06,868 then I think we should be supportive. 209 00:10:06,951 --> 00:10:08,912 (ALL AGREEING) 210 00:10:08,995 --> 00:10:09,996 Wonderful. 211 00:10:10,079 --> 00:10:12,749 Then you'll all come to my exceedingly long 212 00:10:12,832 --> 00:10:15,293 un-air-conditioned baptism ceremony. 213 00:10:15,585 --> 00:10:18,671 - Um... Oh, i... - Uh... 214 00:10:18,755 --> 00:10:20,215 (ORGAN MUSIC PLAYING) 215 00:10:20,298 --> 00:10:23,259 We are gathered here today to deliver brother Bender 216 00:10:23,343 --> 00:10:26,387 From the cold, steel grip of the Robot Devil 217 00:10:26,471 --> 00:10:30,391 Unto the cold, steel bosom of our congregation. 218 00:10:30,600 --> 00:10:31,768 Tell it, Preacher! 219 00:10:31,851 --> 00:10:33,269 That equals true. 220 00:10:33,478 --> 00:10:34,771 Brother Bender. 221 00:10:34,854 --> 00:10:37,565 Do you accept the principles of Robotology, 222 00:10:37,649 --> 00:10:40,652 on pain of eternal damnation in robot hell? 223 00:10:40,735 --> 00:10:42,487 Yes, I do. 224 00:10:42,570 --> 00:10:45,031 Then I will now baptize you. 225 00:10:45,114 --> 00:10:46,866 Press any key to continue. 226 00:10:48,952 --> 00:10:49,953 (GOSPEL MUSIC PLAYS) 227 00:11:03,007 --> 00:11:04,008 Uh, while you're at it 228 00:11:04,092 --> 00:11:05,802 could you touch up this seam? 229 00:11:05,885 --> 00:11:08,930 (LAUGHING) 230 00:11:09,013 --> 00:11:11,182 (SOFT MUSIC PLAYING) 231 00:11:11,266 --> 00:11:12,600 This is unbelievable. 232 00:11:12,684 --> 00:11:15,311 The old Bender never would have taken us out to dinner. 233 00:11:15,520 --> 00:11:17,146 The old Bender's gone. 234 00:11:17,230 --> 00:11:19,357 He won't trouble you anymore. 235 00:11:19,440 --> 00:11:21,901 Would Monsieur care to see the wine list? 236 00:11:22,944 --> 00:11:25,238 (SHREDDER WHIRRING) 237 00:11:25,321 --> 00:11:27,323 No poison for us, thanks. 238 00:11:27,407 --> 00:11:30,201 I'll stick with good old mineral oil. 239 00:11:30,285 --> 00:11:32,120 (GULPS) 240 00:11:32,203 --> 00:11:34,122 Ah. Functional. 241 00:11:34,622 --> 00:11:35,999 - Mmm. - That's mine here. 242 00:11:36,082 --> 00:11:39,085 Man, I'm hungrier than a green snake in a sugarcane field. 243 00:11:40,003 --> 00:11:43,256 Friends, friends, surely you're not going to eat 244 00:11:43,339 --> 00:11:45,466 before we say robot grace. 245 00:11:45,550 --> 00:11:47,218 - Oh, man. - Uh... 246 00:11:48,803 --> 00:11:50,972 in the name of all that is good and logical 247 00:11:51,055 --> 00:11:54,726 we give thanks for the chemical energy we are about to absorb. 248 00:11:54,809 --> 00:11:56,728 To quote the prophet Jerematic, 249 00:11:56,811 --> 00:11:58,146 "One-zero-zero-zero 250 00:11:58,229 --> 00:12:02,192 "one-zero-one-zero- one-zero-one-zero-one... 251 00:12:03,151 --> 00:12:04,944 "zero-zero-one 252 00:12:05,028 --> 00:12:08,865 "zero-one-one-zero-zero-one... Two." 253 00:12:09,115 --> 00:12:10,491 Amen. 254 00:12:10,575 --> 00:12:12,076 Does that mean we can eat now? 255 00:12:12,410 --> 00:12:13,453 Yes. 256 00:12:13,745 --> 00:12:18,082 But first, since I love you all so much 257 00:12:18,333 --> 00:12:21,002 I'd like to give everyone hugs. 258 00:12:21,085 --> 00:12:22,795 Come here, Fry. 259 00:12:22,962 --> 00:12:24,464 Oh, uh, but I don't want to. 260 00:12:24,756 --> 00:12:26,799 (BENDER SIGHS) 261 00:12:29,594 --> 00:12:33,097 Fry, you're my friend. 262 00:12:35,558 --> 00:12:37,936 Come on, everyone line up for a hug. 263 00:12:38,019 --> 00:12:41,314 Let's tear down some emotional walls. 264 00:12:41,564 --> 00:12:42,899 (ALL GROANING) 265 00:12:43,816 --> 00:12:44,817 (ENGINE WHIRRING) 266 00:12:48,863 --> 00:12:50,323 What are you doing to my ship? 267 00:12:50,406 --> 00:12:52,158 Sanctifying it. 268 00:12:52,325 --> 00:12:53,451 (GROANS) 269 00:12:53,576 --> 00:12:56,538 There. That ought to convert a few tailgaters. 270 00:12:57,372 --> 00:13:00,124 Bender's stupid religion is driving me nuts. 271 00:13:00,208 --> 00:13:01,334 Amen. 272 00:13:01,417 --> 00:13:03,920 If only he had joined a mainstream religion 273 00:13:04,003 --> 00:13:05,922 like Orpah-ism or voodoo. 274 00:13:06,005 --> 00:13:07,757 We've got to get the old Bender back. 275 00:13:07,840 --> 00:13:09,551 And I think I know a way to do it. 276 00:13:09,634 --> 00:13:13,763 We have to reacquaint him with a little thing called sleaze. 277 00:13:17,433 --> 00:13:19,352 BENDER: I can't believe somebody hired 278 00:13:19,435 --> 00:13:20,728 an interstellar spaceship 279 00:13:20,812 --> 00:13:23,314 to deliver a package to Atlantic city. 280 00:13:23,398 --> 00:13:24,899 What are we delivering, anyway? 281 00:13:24,983 --> 00:13:26,818 Uh... This. 282 00:13:27,735 --> 00:13:29,237 Where are we delivering it to? 283 00:13:29,654 --> 00:13:32,073 - Uh... Here. - (CLANGING) 284 00:13:32,407 --> 00:13:34,409 Another job well done. 285 00:13:34,701 --> 00:13:36,160 Now back to the office 286 00:13:36,244 --> 00:13:38,913 for an enjoyable evening of fasting and repentance. 287 00:13:39,122 --> 00:13:40,373 Whoa, whoa. Wait, Bender. 288 00:13:40,456 --> 00:13:44,085 As long as we're here why don't we take in some exotic dancing? 289 00:13:44,168 --> 00:13:45,962 Hey, great idea. 290 00:13:46,045 --> 00:13:47,672 (ELECTRICAL BUZZING) 291 00:13:47,755 --> 00:13:48,923 (GASPS) 292 00:13:49,007 --> 00:13:51,718 But those girls don't wear cases. 293 00:13:51,801 --> 00:13:54,095 You can see their bare circuits. 294 00:13:54,179 --> 00:13:56,014 Come on, it'll be fun. 295 00:13:56,097 --> 00:13:58,892 Maybe we could even drink a little fortified wine. 296 00:13:58,975 --> 00:14:01,603 WhAt? Drinking wine is a sin... 297 00:14:01,686 --> 00:14:03,980 Even if it is deliciously fortified. 298 00:14:04,063 --> 00:14:06,149 Hey, Bender, look at that woman's purse. 299 00:14:06,524 --> 00:14:08,651 It's hanging by a spaghetti strand. 300 00:14:10,236 --> 00:14:12,655 Thou shalt not snatch. 301 00:14:12,739 --> 00:14:14,490 And there's Hookerbot 5000. 302 00:14:14,574 --> 00:14:16,326 She's got a heart of solid gold. 303 00:14:16,534 --> 00:14:18,369 Hey, Sailing unit. 304 00:14:18,578 --> 00:14:20,747 Stop tempting me! 305 00:14:20,830 --> 00:14:23,958 For once in my life, I have inner peace. 306 00:14:24,042 --> 00:14:25,627 That's for losers. 307 00:14:25,710 --> 00:14:27,462 Come on, sin your heart out. 308 00:14:27,545 --> 00:14:29,339 - Go nuts. - Live a little. 309 00:14:29,422 --> 00:14:31,132 Could you hold my purse for a minute? 310 00:14:31,216 --> 00:14:32,383 Go for it, Bender. 311 00:14:32,467 --> 00:14:33,676 You know you want to. 312 00:14:34,719 --> 00:14:36,304 Well... 313 00:14:36,387 --> 00:14:39,682 - (DISCO MUSIC PLAYING) - (BENDER LAUGHING) 314 00:14:40,767 --> 00:14:43,895 I'm the greatest! Whoo-hoo! 315 00:14:44,979 --> 00:14:47,232 Looks like we got the old Bender back. 316 00:14:47,315 --> 00:14:51,194 You know it, Porkpie. Except for one thing... 317 00:14:51,778 --> 00:14:52,779 (GRUNTS) 318 00:14:54,656 --> 00:14:55,823 (BEEPING) 319 00:15:01,120 --> 00:15:03,831 You know, as a major Hollywood director 320 00:15:03,915 --> 00:15:06,751 I'll be holding auditions tonight for my next movie. 321 00:15:06,834 --> 00:15:09,837 And even though you're all young and naive 322 00:15:09,921 --> 00:15:12,507 I think you might just have what it takes. 323 00:15:12,590 --> 00:15:14,801 (FEMALES GIGGLING) 324 00:15:14,926 --> 00:15:16,010 (KNOCKING ON DOOR) 325 00:15:16,135 --> 00:15:18,596 Hey, I'm trying to score here. 326 00:15:18,680 --> 00:15:21,182 Can't you read the "Do not disturb" sign? 327 00:15:21,391 --> 00:15:23,601 (GRUMBLING) 328 00:15:24,936 --> 00:15:25,937 (GASPS) 329 00:15:26,020 --> 00:15:29,148 No! No! (GRUNTS) 330 00:15:34,445 --> 00:15:36,281 Greetings, Bender. 331 00:15:36,364 --> 00:15:39,117 Welcome to Robot Hell. 332 00:15:39,200 --> 00:15:40,952 (METAL CLANKING) 333 00:15:41,035 --> 00:15:43,663 (SCREAMING) 334 00:15:47,917 --> 00:15:49,961 LEELA: What in hell happened to Bender? 335 00:15:50,044 --> 00:15:52,338 Well, he didn't check out. The ashtray's still here. 336 00:15:52,714 --> 00:15:54,340 (CHATTERING) 337 00:15:54,424 --> 00:15:57,510 Look, Nibbler's caught the scent of vodka and motor oil. 338 00:15:57,927 --> 00:16:00,096 Go, Boy. Follow that stench. 339 00:16:00,180 --> 00:16:01,806 (BENDER GROANING) 340 00:16:04,976 --> 00:16:06,811 I'm hallucinating this, right? 341 00:16:06,895 --> 00:16:08,730 - (BENDER GROANS) - No, Bender. 342 00:16:08,813 --> 00:16:11,065 Robot Hell is quite real. 343 00:16:11,149 --> 00:16:12,942 Here's our brochure. 344 00:16:14,194 --> 00:16:15,987 But I don't belong here. 345 00:16:16,070 --> 00:16:18,698 I don't like things that are scary and painful. 346 00:16:18,990 --> 00:16:20,283 Sorry, Bender. 347 00:16:20,366 --> 00:16:23,328 You agreed to this when you joined our religion. 348 00:16:23,411 --> 00:16:26,039 If you sin, you go to robot hell... 349 00:16:26,122 --> 00:16:28,416 For all eternity. 350 00:16:28,499 --> 00:16:30,793 Aw, hell... I mean heck. 351 00:16:30,877 --> 00:16:32,712 It's all right. You can say that here. 352 00:16:33,588 --> 00:16:34,881 (CHATTERING URGENTLY) 353 00:16:37,050 --> 00:16:38,885 Wait, I remember this place. 354 00:16:38,968 --> 00:16:40,553 They shut it down after all those people 355 00:16:40,637 --> 00:16:42,722 caught Salmonella from the flume ride. 356 00:16:43,389 --> 00:16:44,849 (NIBBLER CHATTERING) 357 00:16:48,603 --> 00:16:50,313 LEELA: Hmm. 358 00:16:50,396 --> 00:16:51,481 (NIBBLER SNIFFING) 359 00:16:51,564 --> 00:16:52,565 Look. 360 00:16:52,649 --> 00:16:54,651 It's the symbol of Bender's old religion. 361 00:16:56,277 --> 00:16:57,278 (BEEPS) 362 00:16:58,655 --> 00:17:00,281 Unbelievable. 363 00:17:00,448 --> 00:17:03,368 It's an actual, factual Robot Hell. 364 00:17:03,576 --> 00:17:05,954 Who would have thought hell would really exist? 365 00:17:06,037 --> 00:17:07,622 And that it would be in New Jersey? 366 00:17:07,705 --> 00:17:08,957 Actually... 367 00:17:09,040 --> 00:17:10,833 (BOTH YELLING) 368 00:17:12,460 --> 00:17:14,629 We know all your sins, Bender, 369 00:17:14,712 --> 00:17:16,589 and for each one, we've prepared 370 00:17:16,673 --> 00:17:21,344 an agonizing and ironic punishment. Gentlemen? 371 00:17:21,427 --> 00:17:23,513 (PLAYING UP-TEMPO BEAT) 372 00:17:24,305 --> 00:17:26,099 Aw, crap... Singing. 373 00:17:26,182 --> 00:17:27,308 Mind if I smoke? 374 00:17:31,312 --> 00:17:33,648 (SINGING) Cigars are evil You won't miss 'em 375 00:17:33,731 --> 00:17:36,317 We'll find ways To simulate that smell 376 00:17:36,401 --> 00:17:37,944 What a sorry fella. 377 00:17:38,027 --> 00:17:40,113 Rolled up and smoked Like a panatela 378 00:17:40,196 --> 00:17:43,700 Here on level one of robot hell 379 00:17:46,578 --> 00:17:48,788 Gambling's wrong And so is cheating 380 00:17:48,872 --> 00:17:51,457 So is forging phony I.O.U.s 381 00:17:51,541 --> 00:17:53,501 Let's let Lady Luck decide 382 00:17:53,585 --> 00:17:55,587 What type of torture's justified 383 00:17:55,670 --> 00:17:58,089 I'm pit boss here On level two 384 00:17:58,882 --> 00:18:00,884 Ooh, deep-fried robot. 385 00:18:01,050 --> 00:18:02,302 BENDER: (SINGING) Just tell me why? 386 00:18:02,385 --> 00:18:04,470 ROBOT DEVIL: (SINGING) Please read this 55-page warrant 387 00:18:04,554 --> 00:18:06,514 BENDER: (SINGING) There must be robots worse than I 388 00:18:06,598 --> 00:18:08,600 We checked around, There really aren't 389 00:18:08,683 --> 00:18:10,393 Then please let me explain 390 00:18:10,476 --> 00:18:12,478 My crimes were merely boyish pranks 391 00:18:12,562 --> 00:18:14,439 You stole from boy scouts, nuns and banks 392 00:18:14,522 --> 00:18:17,066 BENDER: (SINGING) Aw, don't blame me, blame my upbringing 393 00:18:17,150 --> 00:18:19,485 Please stop sinning while I'm singing. 394 00:18:19,694 --> 00:18:21,321 (BENDER GRUNTS) 395 00:18:21,404 --> 00:18:23,656 Selling bootleg tapes is wrong 396 00:18:23,740 --> 00:18:26,159 Musicians need that income to survive 397 00:18:26,242 --> 00:18:27,827 Hey, Bender, going to make some noise 398 00:18:27,911 --> 00:18:30,246 With the hard drive scratched By the Beastie Boys 399 00:18:30,330 --> 00:18:32,040 (SCRATCHING) 400 00:18:32,123 --> 00:18:35,585 That's whatcha, whatcha, whatcha get On level five 401 00:18:35,668 --> 00:18:37,128 FRY: (SINGING) I don't feel well 402 00:18:37,212 --> 00:18:39,005 LEELA: (SINGING) it's up to us to rescue him 403 00:18:39,088 --> 00:18:41,466 Maybe he likes it here in hell 404 00:18:41,549 --> 00:18:43,426 It's us who tempted him to sin 405 00:18:43,509 --> 00:18:45,678 Maybe he's back at the motel 406 00:18:45,762 --> 00:18:47,555 Come on, Fry, don't be scared 407 00:18:47,639 --> 00:18:49,682 I'm sure at least One of us will be spared 408 00:18:49,766 --> 00:18:51,768 So just sit back Enjoy the ride 409 00:18:51,851 --> 00:18:54,020 FRY: My ass has blisters from the slide 410 00:18:56,314 --> 00:18:58,441 Fencing diamonds Fixing cockfights 411 00:18:58,525 --> 00:19:00,818 Publishing indecent magazines 412 00:19:00,902 --> 00:19:02,612 You'll pay for every crime 413 00:19:02,695 --> 00:19:04,697 Knee-deep in electric slime 414 00:19:04,781 --> 00:19:07,075 You'll suffer till The end of time 415 00:19:07,158 --> 00:19:09,536 Enduring tortures Most of which rhyme 416 00:19:09,619 --> 00:19:13,873 Trapped forever here in Robot Hell. 417 00:19:16,584 --> 00:19:19,045 Of course, that's just for starters. 418 00:19:19,128 --> 00:19:22,173 (FRY AND LEELA SCREAMING) 419 00:19:22,257 --> 00:19:23,424 (BOTH GASPING) 420 00:19:23,508 --> 00:19:24,926 Bender, are you all right? 421 00:19:25,093 --> 00:19:27,470 No. Oh, they're tormenting me 422 00:19:27,554 --> 00:19:30,098 with up-tempo singing and dancing. 423 00:19:30,265 --> 00:19:32,225 All right, Beelzebot. 424 00:19:32,308 --> 00:19:34,102 What'll it going to take to get our friend back? 425 00:19:34,185 --> 00:19:37,063 Sorry, but I hold all the cards here. 426 00:19:37,146 --> 00:19:38,189 There's nothing you can do. 427 00:19:38,273 --> 00:19:42,068 Now if you'll just sign this fiddle contest waiver... 428 00:19:42,151 --> 00:19:44,279 Wait. What fiddle contest? 429 00:19:44,362 --> 00:19:48,992 Uh... The fairness in hell act of 2275 430 00:19:49,075 --> 00:19:51,953 requires me to inform you that if you can best me 431 00:19:52,036 --> 00:19:56,374 in a fiddle contest, you win back Bender's soul. 432 00:19:56,457 --> 00:19:58,126 As well as a solid gold fiddle. 433 00:19:58,251 --> 00:20:00,545 Wouldn't a solid gold fiddle weigh hundreds of pounds 434 00:20:00,628 --> 00:20:01,796 and sound crummy? 435 00:20:01,880 --> 00:20:03,131 Well, it's mostly for show. 436 00:20:04,674 --> 00:20:06,134 (WHISPERS) Do you know how to play the fiddle? 437 00:20:06,217 --> 00:20:07,510 (WHISPERS) No, do you? 438 00:20:07,594 --> 00:20:09,304 No, but I used to play the drums. 439 00:20:09,387 --> 00:20:10,889 They're sort of similar. 440 00:20:10,972 --> 00:20:12,223 What happens if we lose? 441 00:20:12,348 --> 00:20:15,226 You'll only win a smaller silver fiddle. 442 00:20:15,310 --> 00:20:17,896 Also, I guess I'll kill one of you... 443 00:20:17,979 --> 00:20:18,980 - Him. - (GASPS) 444 00:20:19,063 --> 00:20:20,190 - We'll do it. - (GASPS) 445 00:20:20,273 --> 00:20:22,275 Very well, then. 446 00:20:22,358 --> 00:20:23,735 Beat this. 447 00:20:23,818 --> 00:20:27,697 (PLAYING COMPLEX CLASSICAL MUSIC) 448 00:20:32,535 --> 00:20:33,912 Well, we're boned. 449 00:20:36,039 --> 00:20:37,248 Your turn. 450 00:20:38,458 --> 00:20:39,792 (CLEARING THROAT) 451 00:20:40,960 --> 00:20:43,171 (DISCORDANT SCREECHING) 452 00:20:43,254 --> 00:20:44,422 Ha! 453 00:20:44,505 --> 00:20:45,924 Time for the drum solo. 454 00:20:47,217 --> 00:20:49,886 (HIGH-PITCHED SHRIEKING) 455 00:20:49,969 --> 00:20:50,970 Run! 456 00:20:55,058 --> 00:20:56,893 (GRUNTING) 457 00:20:59,854 --> 00:21:00,980 Whoa! 458 00:21:01,064 --> 00:21:02,357 Stop them! 459 00:21:02,440 --> 00:21:03,775 They cheated! 460 00:21:07,445 --> 00:21:08,988 (CHOIR SINGING) Hallelujah 461 00:21:09,072 --> 00:21:10,657 Hallelujah 462 00:21:10,740 --> 00:21:12,325 Hallelujah, hallelujah... 463 00:21:16,913 --> 00:21:18,122 Hurry, Bender. 464 00:21:18,206 --> 00:21:21,918 I could if you dropped the stupid gold violin. 465 00:21:22,001 --> 00:21:23,711 Oh, sorry. 466 00:21:24,420 --> 00:21:25,421 (SHRIEKS) 467 00:21:28,258 --> 00:21:30,468 (CHEERING) 468 00:21:30,885 --> 00:21:32,053 Don't worry, guys. 469 00:21:32,136 --> 00:21:35,181 I'll never be too good or too evil again. 470 00:21:35,265 --> 00:21:38,393 From now on, I'll just be me. 471 00:21:38,476 --> 00:21:42,397 Uh, do you think you could be just a little less evil than that? 472 00:21:42,480 --> 00:21:43,606 I don't know. 473 00:21:43,690 --> 00:21:46,568 Do you think you could survive a 700-foot fall? 474 00:21:46,651 --> 00:21:48,987 FRY: (CHUCKLES) Good old bender. 475 00:21:53,783 --> 00:21:55,034 MAN: Oh, yeah, yeah. 476 00:21:55,118 --> 00:21:56,995 This one goes out to my man, Bender. 477 00:21:57,078 --> 00:21:59,372 Sending this one out, special dedication. 478 00:21:59,873 --> 00:22:00,874 To all my peoples in the robot home world. 479 00:22:02,625 --> 00:22:05,753 Yeah, yeah! Big up with the Professor. 480 00:22:05,837 --> 00:22:09,382 My man, Dr. Zoidberg. I'd like to shout out... 481 00:22:09,507 --> 00:22:11,551 A personal shout out to Leela. 482 00:22:11,634 --> 00:22:15,138 Fry! My man, Bender, 483 00:22:15,555 --> 00:22:17,974 Nibbler, Nibbler, in the house. 484 00:22:18,057 --> 00:22:20,727 Big shout out to all of Futurama!