1
00:00:06,503 --> 00:00:08,505
(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)

2
00:00:34,740 --> 00:00:36,325
(CHATTERING EXCITEDLY)

3
00:00:38,285 --> 00:00:39,494
(WHIMPERING)

4
00:00:40,787 --> 00:00:42,414
Good news, everyone.

5
00:00:42,497 --> 00:00:45,542
Several years ago,
I tried to log on to AOL,

6
00:00:45,626 --> 00:00:48,086
and it just went through. Whee!

7
00:00:48,337 --> 00:00:49,838
We're online.

8
00:00:49,922 --> 00:00:52,257
Go ahead, get into these net suits.

9
00:00:52,341 --> 00:00:54,927
I designed and tested them myself.

10
00:00:55,010 --> 00:00:57,846
(SNIFFS) They smell like
burning rhesus monkey.

11
00:00:57,930 --> 00:01:00,223
Really? I guess
when you're around it all day

12
00:01:00,307 --> 00:01:01,683
you stop noticing.

13
00:01:01,767 --> 00:01:03,644
- Off you go.
- (BEEPS)

14
00:01:06,146 --> 00:01:08,065
(MECHANICAL TRILLING)

15
00:01:08,607 --> 00:01:09,608
Hey.

16
00:01:09,942 --> 00:01:10,943
Ha!

17
00:01:13,487 --> 00:01:14,655
Behold!

18
00:01:15,197 --> 00:01:16,531
The Internet!

19
00:01:17,240 --> 00:01:19,242
(DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING)

20
00:01:21,495 --> 00:01:22,955
My god.

21
00:01:23,038 --> 00:01:25,082
It's full of ads.

22
00:01:25,290 --> 00:01:27,709
(ADS CAWING AND SCREECHING)

23
00:01:28,377 --> 00:01:30,003
(BOTH SCREAMING)

24
00:01:30,921 --> 00:01:32,172
(GASPS)

25
00:01:32,798 --> 00:01:33,799
(GRUNTING)

26
00:01:35,050 --> 00:01:36,301
(BENDER SCREAMING)

27
00:01:38,720 --> 00:01:40,555
(AD SCREECHING)

28
00:01:40,639 --> 00:01:41,890
(WHIMPERING)

29
00:01:42,808 --> 00:01:43,809
(FRY GRUNTS)

30
00:01:43,892 --> 00:01:45,018
Follow me.

31
00:01:51,566 --> 00:01:52,859
FRY: It's immense.

32
00:01:52,943 --> 00:01:56,238
It's got every piece of information
anyone could ever want.

33
00:01:57,072 --> 00:01:58,532
So I see.

34
00:01:58,615 --> 00:02:00,659
- Woo-hoo!
- HERMES: Oh, yeah!

35
00:02:00,742 --> 00:02:02,536
What? What's going on here?

36
00:02:03,537 --> 00:02:04,955
(EXCLAIMS)

37
00:02:07,416 --> 00:02:09,126
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)

38
00:02:11,753 --> 00:02:12,754
(GASPS)

39
00:02:13,171 --> 00:02:14,673
Hey, that's me.

40
00:02:14,756 --> 00:02:15,841
No, it isn't.

41
00:02:15,924 --> 00:02:20,512
I just took some pictures of your face
and stuck them on someone else's body.

42
00:02:20,596 --> 00:02:21,680
Hey.

43
00:02:25,142 --> 00:02:26,810
Are you over 18?

44
00:02:26,893 --> 00:02:28,604
- Yes.
- Yes.

45
00:02:29,354 --> 00:02:30,814
Hi. (GIGGLES)

46
00:02:30,897 --> 00:02:32,190
I'm telling you, Fry,

47
00:02:32,274 --> 00:02:34,860
they've got a chat room for everybody.

48
00:02:34,943 --> 00:02:36,028
And here it is.

49
00:02:36,612 --> 00:02:39,364
- Ew. That is so gross.
- Yeah.

50
00:02:39,448 --> 00:02:41,992
- I'll stick with this one, thank you.
- Yeah.

51
00:02:45,329 --> 00:02:47,664
(LAUGHS MISCHIEVOUSLY)

52
00:02:51,543 --> 00:02:52,544
(BEEPS)

53
00:02:54,963 --> 00:02:55,964
Hi.

54
00:02:56,048 --> 00:03:00,093
I'm a naughty nurse
and I really need someone to talk to.

55
00:03:00,177 --> 00:03:01,762
$9.95 a minute.

56
00:03:01,887 --> 00:03:04,348
Oh! You're a dollar naughtier than most.

57
00:03:06,266 --> 00:03:07,893
So, how about them knicks?

58
00:03:10,729 --> 00:03:11,730
(SIGHS)

59
00:03:11,813 --> 00:03:14,691
Hello? Are there any girls
in this room at all?

60
00:03:14,775 --> 00:03:18,070
Yeah. Bring on the hot chicks
'cause I'm a hot stud.

61
00:03:18,153 --> 00:03:19,613
- ALL: Yeah.
- So are we.

62
00:03:19,738 --> 00:03:21,573
I'm a woman
if that's what you mean.

63
00:03:21,657 --> 00:03:23,116
- (MEN GASPING)
- It's a girl.

64
00:03:23,825 --> 00:03:27,287
I don't like to play games,
so I'll just say I'm a cyclops.

65
00:03:27,371 --> 00:03:30,749
I'm a spaceship captain.
I'm the only one of my species.

66
00:03:30,832 --> 00:03:32,584
And I'm interested in meeting a man.

67
00:03:32,668 --> 00:03:33,710
(MEEKLY) A woman?

68
00:03:33,835 --> 00:03:35,087
I'm scared.

69
00:03:36,630 --> 00:03:39,424
Well, thanks to the Internet,
I'm now bored with sex.

70
00:03:39,508 --> 00:03:42,636
Is there a place on the web that
panders to my lust for violence?

71
00:03:42,719 --> 00:03:44,930
Is the space pope reptilian?

72
00:03:45,847 --> 00:03:47,266
HERMES: Get ready for fun, Fry.

73
00:03:47,349 --> 00:03:51,019
Nowadays we have a type of game
played entirely on video.

74
00:03:51,103 --> 00:03:53,146
We call it a video game.

75
00:03:53,230 --> 00:03:55,315
FRY: Uh, a video game, you say?

76
00:03:55,399 --> 00:03:56,942
Well, golly gee.

77
00:03:57,025 --> 00:04:00,654
You mighty spacemen of the future
will have to show me how it works.

78
00:04:02,364 --> 00:04:03,532
(LAUGHS)

79
00:04:07,369 --> 00:04:08,412
(WHOOPING)

80
00:04:15,502 --> 00:04:16,587
(GASPS)

81
00:04:21,508 --> 00:04:22,509
Hmm.

82
00:04:23,176 --> 00:04:24,177
(GASPS)

83
00:04:27,889 --> 00:04:29,224
(GRUNTING)

84
00:04:33,937 --> 00:04:35,772
The doctor is in.

85
00:04:38,150 --> 00:04:39,860
The doctor is out.

86
00:04:40,444 --> 00:04:43,363
Everyone, please sign off.
We have a delivery.

87
00:04:43,488 --> 00:04:45,574
Plus I have to use the phone to...

88
00:04:46,575 --> 00:04:47,826
(LAUGHS)

89
00:04:48,535 --> 00:04:50,621
(GRUNTING)

90
00:04:56,877 --> 00:04:59,212
Leela, please tell the others that...

91
00:05:04,134 --> 00:05:05,677
(BENDER EXCLAIMING)

92
00:05:08,347 --> 00:05:10,307
(GROANING)

93
00:05:16,730 --> 00:05:17,731
(COCKS)

94
00:05:29,242 --> 00:05:30,243
(SCREAMS)

95
00:05:31,244 --> 00:05:32,245
(GASPS)

96
00:05:34,706 --> 00:05:35,707
Who are you?

97
00:05:35,791 --> 00:05:37,084
I saw you in the chat room

98
00:05:37,209 --> 00:05:39,461
But you left before I had
a chance to talk to you.

99
00:05:39,586 --> 00:05:43,465
After all these years of
searching for another cyclops.

100
00:05:43,548 --> 00:05:44,841
I can't believe it.

101
00:05:44,967 --> 00:05:47,177
I've dreamed of this moment all my life.

102
00:05:47,261 --> 00:05:50,180
Do you think perhaps, you and I...

103
00:05:52,641 --> 00:05:53,684
Ha-ha!

104
00:05:55,227 --> 00:05:56,603
Fry, you idiot.

105
00:05:56,687 --> 00:05:58,355
Ever since I was abandoned on Earth

106
00:05:58,438 --> 00:06:00,732
I've been searching for who my people are

107
00:06:00,816 --> 00:06:02,276
and where they come from.

108
00:06:02,359 --> 00:06:04,903
Then I finally meet another cyclops
and you blast him.

109
00:06:04,987 --> 00:06:07,823
You wrecked my one chance
to learn who I am.

110
00:06:07,906 --> 00:06:10,492
Oh, Leela, I feel terrible.

111
00:06:10,575 --> 00:06:12,202
If there's anything I can ever do...

112
00:06:12,286 --> 00:06:13,287
Gotcha.

113
00:06:15,455 --> 00:06:16,456
I won!

114
00:06:16,540 --> 00:06:17,874
I'm the greatest!

115
00:06:19,126 --> 00:06:20,669
(LAUGHING)

116
00:06:22,337 --> 00:06:24,006
Come on. We have work to do.

117
00:06:25,340 --> 00:06:26,842
(EXCLAIMS AND GROANS)

118
00:06:31,221 --> 00:06:32,306
(SIGHS)

119
00:06:32,556 --> 00:06:36,101
Are you still mad at me for wrecking
your once-in-a-lifetime chance

120
00:06:36,226 --> 00:06:37,894
to learn the meaning of your existence?

121
00:06:37,978 --> 00:06:40,981
No. I'm just happy you were able
to win a video game.

122
00:06:41,064 --> 00:06:43,984
Now let's concentrate on getting
this desperately needed popcorn

123
00:06:44,067 --> 00:06:46,778
to the people of Cineplex 14, okay?

124
00:06:47,904 --> 00:06:49,781
(AUTOMATED VOICE SPEAKING)
Leela, you've got mail.

125
00:06:50,574 --> 00:06:51,825
It's not spam.

126
00:06:51,908 --> 00:06:52,993
Huh?

127
00:06:54,077 --> 00:06:55,203
It's him.

128
00:06:55,287 --> 00:06:56,330
To Leela.

129
00:06:56,455 --> 00:06:58,874
Subject, hello. I am Alcazar.

130
00:06:58,957 --> 00:07:00,876
Fortunately, I wrote down your screen name

131
00:07:00,959 --> 00:07:03,003
before I was dispatched
by that oafish moron.

132
00:07:03,086 --> 00:07:04,212
Kicked your ass.

133
00:07:04,296 --> 00:07:05,923
Leela, we have much to discuss.

134
00:07:06,048 --> 00:07:08,216
Please come join me
on the planet of your birth.

135
00:07:08,300 --> 00:07:09,301
Coordinates follow.

136
00:07:11,678 --> 00:07:14,556
Well, too bad we've got
to make that urgent popcorn delivery.

137
00:07:17,225 --> 00:07:18,602
LEELA: It'll get there.

138
00:07:22,481 --> 00:07:24,232
(KERNELS POPPING)

139
00:07:43,794 --> 00:07:45,754
LEELA: After a whole life of searching,

140
00:07:45,837 --> 00:07:47,839
I may finally have found where I belong.

141
00:07:47,923 --> 00:07:49,174
Too bad it's a dump.

142
00:07:52,844 --> 00:07:54,388
Look at that statue.

143
00:07:54,471 --> 00:07:55,806
It's only got one eye.

144
00:07:55,889 --> 00:07:57,015
Lazy sculptor.

145
00:07:57,099 --> 00:07:58,475
ALCAZAR: Welcome home, Leela.

146
00:07:58,558 --> 00:07:59,768
Alcazar?

147
00:08:00,727 --> 00:08:03,146
Are you real or am I seeing single?

148
00:08:03,230 --> 00:08:04,564
Ow. (CHUCKLES)

149
00:08:04,648 --> 00:08:05,899
Of course I'm real.

150
00:08:05,983 --> 00:08:09,611
After all this time,
somebody else with one eye,

151
00:08:09,695 --> 00:08:13,365
who isn't a clumsy carpenter
or a kid with a BB gun.

152
00:08:13,448 --> 00:08:15,742
It's all right, Leela.
You'll never be alone again.

153
00:08:15,826 --> 00:08:16,910
(CLAPS)

154
00:08:18,120 --> 00:08:19,371
Come.

155
00:08:19,454 --> 00:08:21,498
Let me introduce you to yourself.

156
00:08:22,040 --> 00:08:24,334
- Do you mind if your servants walk?
- Not at all.

157
00:08:30,465 --> 00:08:31,717
(LAUGHS)

158
00:08:32,926 --> 00:08:35,095
ALCAZAR:
We are the last remaining cyclopes.

159
00:08:35,178 --> 00:08:36,638
Our planet is Cyclopia.

160
00:08:36,722 --> 00:08:38,765
This is the capital, Cyclops City.

161
00:08:38,890 --> 00:08:40,434
Stop me if I'm too fast for you.

162
00:08:40,559 --> 00:08:42,978
So much information, and yet, somehow

163
00:08:43,103 --> 00:08:45,147
I feel as if I know it all already.

164
00:08:45,230 --> 00:08:48,525
This sacred mosaic
depicts our goddess of beauty.

165
00:08:48,609 --> 00:08:51,695
Hmm. You got any
sacred artwork of her from the back?

166
00:08:51,778 --> 00:08:53,614
Her perfect eye
reminds me of yours, Leela.

167
00:08:53,947 --> 00:08:55,324
Had our race survived

168
00:08:55,407 --> 00:08:57,242
you would have been a temple priestess

169
00:08:57,367 --> 00:08:58,619
or a supermodel.

170
00:08:58,702 --> 00:09:00,537
Oh, please. Really?

171
00:09:05,083 --> 00:09:06,668
(BENDER HUMMING)

172
00:09:11,506 --> 00:09:13,342
There's the infamous pirate, Purple beard,

173
00:09:13,425 --> 00:09:15,385
scourge of the six seas.

174
00:09:15,469 --> 00:09:16,595
What's over
that hill?

175
00:09:16,678 --> 00:09:17,804
ALCAZAR: The Forbidden Valley.

176
00:09:17,888 --> 00:09:20,098
A holy sanctuary
where no one may tread.

177
00:09:20,182 --> 00:09:21,642
Is that anything like a cemetery?

178
00:09:21,725 --> 00:09:23,435
'Cause I got to take a leak. Ow!

179
00:09:23,518 --> 00:09:25,979
Fry, that's offensive to our people.

180
00:09:26,063 --> 00:09:28,315
- Isn't it?
- Ow.

181
00:09:31,610 --> 00:09:32,903
ALCAZAR: This is my home.

182
00:09:32,986 --> 00:09:35,781
I hope you don't think less of me
because I live in a giant castle.

183
00:09:35,864 --> 00:09:37,658
Oh, no, not at all.

184
00:09:37,741 --> 00:09:39,576
If anything, I'm more impressed.

185
00:09:42,913 --> 00:09:46,083
Ooh. I'm going to need
to make some room.

186
00:09:48,252 --> 00:09:50,504
And here is where
I dream my lonely dreams

187
00:09:50,587 --> 00:09:52,214
and cook my simple meals.

188
00:09:52,297 --> 00:09:53,966
It's all so sad.

189
00:09:54,049 --> 00:09:56,134
What happened to our people?

190
00:09:57,803 --> 00:09:58,971
(ALCAZAR SIGHS)

191
00:10:01,682 --> 00:10:04,017
That's too painful to speak of now.

192
00:10:04,101 --> 00:10:05,852
Come. I'll show you your quarters.

193
00:10:07,604 --> 00:10:09,231
(BENDER WHISTLING)

194
00:10:11,566 --> 00:10:13,986
- (METAL CLANGING)
- Ow. Ow. Ow.

195
00:10:20,200 --> 00:10:22,244
(ALCAZAR CRYING)

196
00:10:35,090 --> 00:10:37,926
I heard you from my room.
What's wrong?

197
00:10:38,010 --> 00:10:39,886
Nothing. It's just...

198
00:10:40,262 --> 00:10:41,263
No, Leela.

199
00:10:41,346 --> 00:10:43,223
I don't want to see tears
in your perfect eye.

200
00:10:43,515 --> 00:10:46,310
Please. Is it about the fate
of our people?

201
00:10:46,393 --> 00:10:48,478
Because I'm very interested in that.

202
00:10:48,562 --> 00:10:50,147
Well, okay. But it's chilly,

203
00:10:50,230 --> 00:10:52,274
and you're going to be
all wet from the tears.

204
00:10:52,399 --> 00:10:54,026
Let's go into my chamber.

205
00:10:56,778 --> 00:10:58,780
It wasn't long ago,

206
00:10:58,864 --> 00:11:00,949
our people were happy and prosperous.

207
00:11:01,033 --> 00:11:03,577
But the eyeless mole people of Subterra 3

208
00:11:03,660 --> 00:11:05,245
grew jealous of our visual prowess.

209
00:11:05,329 --> 00:11:08,790
They fired missiles in all directions,
hoping to hit Cyclopia.

210
00:11:11,084 --> 00:11:14,755
Unfortunately, one of
the 40 planets hit was ours.

211
00:11:14,838 --> 00:11:16,840
How far away do you think it is?

212
00:11:16,924 --> 00:11:18,008
A trillion miles?

213
00:11:20,928 --> 00:11:21,970
ALCAZAR: Things got hot.

214
00:11:22,220 --> 00:11:23,555
You look a little hot, actually.

215
00:11:23,639 --> 00:11:25,432
You could take off that jacket.

216
00:11:25,849 --> 00:11:27,351
Our people don't like to be hot.

217
00:11:27,434 --> 00:11:29,519
Anyway, just before the impact,

218
00:11:29,603 --> 00:11:32,731
our smartest scientist
managed to save one baby.

219
00:11:39,446 --> 00:11:41,698
Alcazar, I used to be a baby.

220
00:11:41,782 --> 00:11:43,116
It might have been me.

221
00:11:43,200 --> 00:11:45,702
ALCAZAR: Fortunately, I was employed
as a pool cleaner at the time.

222
00:11:45,786 --> 00:11:48,330
And when I emerged
from retrieving a dead possum

223
00:11:48,413 --> 00:11:50,332
I found I was the only one left.

224
00:11:50,415 --> 00:11:51,458
(YELLING)

225
00:11:51,541 --> 00:11:53,210
It's so tragic.

226
00:11:53,293 --> 00:11:56,838
Yes, but the real tragedy
is that our race ends with us.

227
00:11:56,922 --> 00:11:59,091
- It doesn't have to.
- What do you mean?

228
00:11:59,174 --> 00:12:00,634
You're a male.

229
00:12:00,717 --> 00:12:02,219
And I'm a female.

230
00:12:02,302 --> 00:12:03,845
I'm still not following you.

231
00:12:05,305 --> 00:12:07,057
(BOTH MOANING)

232
00:12:12,145 --> 00:12:13,480
(BIRDS CHIRPING)

233
00:12:17,776 --> 00:12:19,278
Wake up, my king.

234
00:12:19,361 --> 00:12:20,445
(GROANS)

235
00:12:21,321 --> 00:12:22,614
(COUGHS)

236
00:12:24,533 --> 00:12:25,534
(CLEARS THROAT)

237
00:12:25,617 --> 00:12:26,785
Geez, what a night.

238
00:12:26,910 --> 00:12:28,453
Make me some coffee, would ya?

239
00:12:28,578 --> 00:12:30,539
Uh, sure. Okay.

240
00:12:30,664 --> 00:12:32,874
- What do you take with that?
- Pancakes and sausage.

241
00:12:32,958 --> 00:12:34,626
Kitchen's in basement,
pans in attic.

242
00:12:34,710 --> 00:12:38,213
Maybe after breakfast, we can talk about
rebuilding our civilization.

243
00:12:38,297 --> 00:12:40,173
(SNORING)

244
00:12:43,635 --> 00:12:44,636
Mmm.

245
00:12:45,345 --> 00:12:46,847
Great pancakes, Leela.

246
00:12:46,930 --> 00:12:50,559
Yeah, they'll come in handy
if I need to cover any tiny manholes.

247
00:12:50,934 --> 00:12:52,352
(LAUGHING)

248
00:12:55,564 --> 00:12:57,482
Listen, hon,
we don't want to look like slobs

249
00:12:57,566 --> 00:12:59,693
- in front of the other species, do we?
- No.

250
00:12:59,776 --> 00:13:01,236
So get to work on these dishes.

251
00:13:01,320 --> 00:13:04,573
And then organize my collection
of naked celebrity photos.

252
00:13:04,656 --> 00:13:06,700
- Look, Alcazar...
- Call me Al.

253
00:13:06,783 --> 00:13:07,868
Look, Al.

254
00:13:07,951 --> 00:13:10,078
I know you've been
living alone a long time,

255
00:13:10,162 --> 00:13:11,330
and I can sympathize.

256
00:13:11,413 --> 00:13:12,706
But I'm not your maid.

257
00:13:12,789 --> 00:13:14,207
You're right. I'm sorry.

258
00:13:14,291 --> 00:13:16,293
I guess the relationship
isn't going to work out.

259
00:13:16,376 --> 00:13:19,212
So much for the cyclops race.
It was a pretty good race but...

260
00:13:19,296 --> 00:13:20,505
Okay, okay.

261
00:13:20,589 --> 00:13:22,174
I'll do the dishes.

262
00:13:22,257 --> 00:13:24,051
Hey, where'd they go?

263
00:13:24,134 --> 00:13:25,510
(DISHES CLATTERING)

264
00:13:28,764 --> 00:13:32,893
(SIGHS) Leela is experiencing
the greatest joy a woman can feel,

265
00:13:32,976 --> 00:13:35,520
worshipping some lowlife jerk.

266
00:13:35,604 --> 00:13:38,982
He may be some lowlife jerk,
but I don't trust him.

267
00:13:39,066 --> 00:13:40,317
I think he's hiding something,

268
00:13:40,400 --> 00:13:42,152
and I'm going to find out what it is.

269
00:13:46,990 --> 00:13:49,868
(LAUGHS) Try and stop me.

270
00:13:51,036 --> 00:13:52,913
- (SCREAMS)
- (THUDS)

271
00:13:53,747 --> 00:13:54,748
LEELA: Al?

272
00:13:54,831 --> 00:13:57,084
I did my hair the way you wanted it.

273
00:14:00,295 --> 00:14:01,380
Who are these people?

274
00:14:01,463 --> 00:14:02,464
Friends.

275
00:14:03,215 --> 00:14:05,425
Hey, where'd you get this couch

276
00:14:05,509 --> 00:14:07,386
and that TV set and all this stuff?

277
00:14:07,469 --> 00:14:09,513
They were giving it away
on the street corner.

278
00:14:09,596 --> 00:14:10,764
Just like you, Leela.

279
00:14:10,931 --> 00:14:12,432
(HOOTING)

280
00:14:13,225 --> 00:14:16,728
Too bad they weren't giving away
the three things you actually need,

281
00:14:16,812 --> 00:14:20,274
mouthwash, a back wax,
and stain-proof underwear.

282
00:14:20,357 --> 00:14:22,818
- (CHEERING)
- You go, girl!

283
00:14:22,901 --> 00:14:25,445
By the way, your pal Fry
fell into the dungeon.

284
00:14:25,529 --> 00:14:28,115
Take him a taco so
he doesn't die and stink up the place.

285
00:14:28,198 --> 00:14:29,533
Come on, Al.

286
00:14:29,616 --> 00:14:31,076
Can't you let the little guy out?

287
00:14:31,159 --> 00:14:33,662
Geez, Leela, twice in one day?

288
00:14:33,745 --> 00:14:34,997
I'm not Superman.

289
00:14:35,205 --> 00:14:36,582
(CHEERING)

290
00:14:41,712 --> 00:14:44,715
Why were you sneaking
into my people's Forbidden Valley?

291
00:14:44,840 --> 00:14:47,217
'Cause I think Alcazar's
hiding something from you.

292
00:14:47,301 --> 00:14:49,303
Listen, Leela, you may not like it.

293
00:14:49,386 --> 00:14:51,430
You may not believe it or want to hear it.

294
00:14:51,513 --> 00:14:54,057
But Alcazar's a jerk.
He's bad for you. He...

295
00:14:54,141 --> 00:14:56,476
- I know.
- You do?

296
00:14:56,560 --> 00:14:59,938
Fry, if it's obvious to you
with your learning disability

297
00:15:00,022 --> 00:15:01,773
then, of course, it's obvious to me.

298
00:15:01,857 --> 00:15:04,651
He's crude and gross,
and he treats me like a slave.

299
00:15:04,735 --> 00:15:06,486
Then dump his one-eyed ass.

300
00:15:06,570 --> 00:15:07,571
I can't.

301
00:15:07,654 --> 00:15:10,782
If I leave Alcazar
that's the end of the cyclops race.

302
00:15:10,866 --> 00:15:12,367
And I won't let that happen,

303
00:15:12,451 --> 00:15:14,661
even if it means
a lifetime of unhappiness.

304
00:15:14,870 --> 00:15:16,288
(TOILET FLUSHING)

305
00:15:16,371 --> 00:15:18,832
ALCAZAR:
Leela, mop up in aisle number two.

306
00:15:18,999 --> 00:15:21,501
(ALCAZAR'S FRIENDS CHEERING)

307
00:15:21,752 --> 00:15:23,211
I'll break up with him at dinner.

308
00:15:23,295 --> 00:15:25,088
I'll be there.

309
00:15:27,174 --> 00:15:28,800
Yo, Leela, what gives?

310
00:15:28,884 --> 00:15:30,510
Pig says your slop tastes like crap.

311
00:15:30,594 --> 00:15:32,930
Yeah, like crap. (SNORTS)

312
00:15:33,013 --> 00:15:34,014
Come on, Leela.

313
00:15:34,139 --> 00:15:36,558
You deserve better than this guy.
Dump him already.

314
00:15:36,642 --> 00:15:37,851
I'm trying.

315
00:15:38,727 --> 00:15:41,146
Hey, everyone,
jam a sock in your spit faucets.

316
00:15:42,439 --> 00:15:44,775
Not long ago, I spent my lonely nights

317
00:15:44,858 --> 00:15:47,361
renting slasher flicks
with Ratman and his girlfriend.

318
00:15:47,444 --> 00:15:49,446
But then a beautiful woman arrived...

319
00:15:49,529 --> 00:15:50,739
Stop eating, Pig!

320
00:15:50,822 --> 00:15:54,660
...and she brought new hope for me
and our once-great civilization.

321
00:15:54,743 --> 00:15:57,454
Now, a million centuries
of cyclops destiny

322
00:15:57,579 --> 00:15:59,915
depend on the answer
to one question.

323
00:16:00,499 --> 00:16:03,085
Leela, will you marry me?

324
00:16:03,168 --> 00:16:04,753
No. No.

325
00:16:04,836 --> 00:16:06,463
Yes, I will!

326
00:16:06,546 --> 00:16:07,631
Oh!

327
00:16:11,093 --> 00:16:13,136
They're getting married.

328
00:16:22,980 --> 00:16:24,648
Congratulations, Leela.

329
00:16:25,774 --> 00:16:28,402
- Glad you could make it.
- It's a magical day.

330
00:16:28,485 --> 00:16:30,070
Welcome!

331
00:16:40,831 --> 00:16:42,874
Psst, Leela!
You've got to get me out of here.

332
00:16:42,958 --> 00:16:44,918
It's horrible. Eating scraps,

333
00:16:45,002 --> 00:16:48,338
letting my waste drop wherever it falls
like an animal in a zoo.

334
00:16:48,422 --> 00:16:49,923
Animals go in the corner.

335
00:16:50,007 --> 00:16:52,634
The corner. Why didn't I think of that?

336
00:16:52,718 --> 00:16:55,262
Look, Fry, I'd like to help you

337
00:16:55,345 --> 00:16:57,598
but it's my wedding, and I'm kind of busy.

338
00:16:57,681 --> 00:16:59,933
Here. Try to be happy for me.

339
00:17:00,058 --> 00:17:01,768
That way, at least one of us will be.

340
00:17:02,436 --> 00:17:03,645
That's it.

341
00:17:03,729 --> 00:17:05,856
It's time for this bird to walk.

342
00:17:06,231 --> 00:17:07,566
(GRUNTING)

343
00:17:12,070 --> 00:17:13,363
(LAUGHS)

344
00:17:13,780 --> 00:17:14,781
(GASPS)

345
00:17:14,865 --> 00:17:15,949
Ow!

346
00:17:16,241 --> 00:17:17,618
(BENDER GROANS)

347
00:17:17,701 --> 00:17:20,746
Bender! Come on, we've got to
get some dirt on Alcazar.

348
00:17:20,829 --> 00:17:23,957
Let's go find out what makes the
Forbidden Valley so forbidden.

349
00:17:24,041 --> 00:17:25,876
Uh, no thanks. I'm good.

350
00:17:25,959 --> 00:17:28,629
But there's probably some cool
forbidden stuff you can steal.

351
00:17:28,712 --> 00:17:30,255
I don't know, Fry.

352
00:17:30,339 --> 00:17:33,175
For the first time in my life, I feel like

353
00:17:33,258 --> 00:17:35,010
I've stolen enough.

354
00:17:35,093 --> 00:17:37,012
Bender, snap out of it.

355
00:17:37,095 --> 00:17:38,430
(EXCLAIMS)

356
00:17:38,555 --> 00:17:40,307
Sorry. I don't know
what came over me.

357
00:17:40,390 --> 00:17:41,391
Let's go!

358
00:17:42,684 --> 00:17:44,519
(SINGING) I love stealin'

359
00:17:44,603 --> 00:17:46,521
I love takin' things

360
00:17:48,482 --> 00:17:50,108
(YAWNS)

361
00:17:51,485 --> 00:17:54,029
(PLAYS HERE COMES THE BRIDE)

362
00:17:56,490 --> 00:17:57,491
(SNIFFLES)

363
00:17:57,574 --> 00:18:01,161
That pig over there is wearing
the same sandals as me.

364
00:18:04,289 --> 00:18:06,208
FRY: Come on, boy, jump!

365
00:18:06,291 --> 00:18:08,001
Good boy.

366
00:18:08,085 --> 00:18:09,753
BENDER: Whoa, mittens.

367
00:18:11,255 --> 00:18:12,422
(BENDER GASPS)

368
00:18:12,756 --> 00:18:13,840
FRY: My god!

369
00:18:13,924 --> 00:18:16,051
Four identical castles.

370
00:18:16,134 --> 00:18:19,554
Each more identical than the last.

371
00:18:20,681 --> 00:18:22,683
That's weird. It's another cyclops.

372
00:18:22,766 --> 00:18:24,518
Only this one has five eyes.

373
00:18:24,601 --> 00:18:27,312
And here's another one with no eyes.

374
00:18:28,605 --> 00:18:32,067
Does anyone have a reason
why this couple

375
00:18:32,150 --> 00:18:34,152
shall not be joined

376
00:18:34,236 --> 00:18:37,698
in the irrevocable shackles of holy bliss?

377
00:18:37,781 --> 00:18:40,033
Saving a race of one-eyed monsters?

378
00:18:40,117 --> 00:18:41,368
Who could object to that?

379
00:18:43,620 --> 00:18:44,955
Cut to the chase, preach.

380
00:18:45,038 --> 00:18:47,040
Do you, Alcazar, take this woman...
(SPEAKING RAPIDLY)

381
00:18:47,124 --> 00:18:48,792
...in sickness, to love, death, part?

382
00:18:48,875 --> 00:18:50,294
Yeah, sure, I do. Come on, faster!

383
00:18:50,377 --> 00:18:52,671
Do you, Leela,
copy and paste his response

384
00:18:52,754 --> 00:18:54,298
till death do you part?

385
00:19:02,848 --> 00:19:04,641
I...

386
00:19:05,142 --> 00:19:06,852
(SCREECHING)

387
00:19:07,352 --> 00:19:08,562
(ALL GASPING)

388
00:19:08,770 --> 00:19:10,314
- Oh, my god.
- (OINKS)

389
00:19:10,439 --> 00:19:12,357
- What the...
- Hey, Alcazar,

390
00:19:12,441 --> 00:19:14,359
you left somebody
off the guest list.

391
00:19:14,526 --> 00:19:15,611
(PANTING)

392
00:19:15,694 --> 00:19:16,778
Alcazar!

393
00:19:17,237 --> 00:19:19,615
Why you are so late
for our wedding?

394
00:19:19,740 --> 00:19:21,575
And why you have only one eye?

395
00:19:21,658 --> 00:19:23,076
It's... (CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY)

396
00:19:23,327 --> 00:19:24,411
Oh.

397
00:19:25,412 --> 00:19:26,872
Uh... Hey, sweetie.

398
00:19:26,955 --> 00:19:28,790
Just go back to the castle
and wait for me.

399
00:19:30,000 --> 00:19:31,418
She... She's nuts.

400
00:19:32,002 --> 00:19:35,923
I can morph into a five-eyed alien
and I kind of said I'd marry her.

401
00:19:36,006 --> 00:19:39,885
But I'm really a cyclops
and I'm really going to marry you.

402
00:19:39,968 --> 00:19:42,679
Oh, yeah?
Then what about this?

403
00:19:44,306 --> 00:19:45,682
(CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY)

404
00:19:47,100 --> 00:19:48,143
This is a bit awkward.

405
00:19:48,226 --> 00:19:49,853
- Who's she?
- Who's she?

406
00:19:49,937 --> 00:19:51,021
Who are they?

407
00:19:51,104 --> 00:19:52,856
Go back to the castle, Sandy.

408
00:19:52,940 --> 00:19:54,691
And maybe you'd like to meet her

409
00:19:54,775 --> 00:19:56,109
and her.

410
00:19:56,234 --> 00:19:58,028
(MUMBLING)

411
00:19:58,654 --> 00:20:00,614
This... (CHUCKLES)

412
00:20:00,781 --> 00:20:01,782
Leela...

413
00:20:01,865 --> 00:20:04,117
This must all be very confusing.

414
00:20:04,201 --> 00:20:05,202
A little.

415
00:20:05,285 --> 00:20:08,080
That's why I've decided to hurt you
until you explain it.

416
00:20:08,246 --> 00:20:10,082
(GRUNTING)

417
00:20:13,377 --> 00:20:15,295
Show us your real form.

418
00:20:15,379 --> 00:20:16,630
- Yeah!
- Do it!

419
00:20:29,017 --> 00:20:32,771
Well, this is the real me,
but I can explain.

420
00:20:32,854 --> 00:20:34,523
We all have needs.

421
00:20:34,606 --> 00:20:36,483
Mine was to make it with five weirdos

422
00:20:36,566 --> 00:20:38,610
and have them scrub my five castles.

423
00:20:38,694 --> 00:20:40,320
I gave you all what you wanted

424
00:20:40,404 --> 00:20:41,822
and, of course, I made
a few bucks

425
00:20:41,905 --> 00:20:43,782
letting Pig watch
through the two-way mirror.

426
00:20:43,865 --> 00:20:45,659
Can any of you say
you wouldn't have done

427
00:20:45,742 --> 00:20:47,536
the exact same thing in my position?

428
00:20:47,619 --> 00:20:48,870
(SNIFFLES)

429
00:20:48,954 --> 00:20:50,372
He's a saint.

430
00:20:50,455 --> 00:20:53,500
But why did you have all
five weddings on the same day?

431
00:20:53,584 --> 00:20:56,795
Hey, lady, you got any idea what it costs
to rent a tux that changes shape?

432
00:20:56,878 --> 00:20:58,463
All right, Alcazar.

433
00:20:58,547 --> 00:21:01,675
- I just have one last question for you.
- What's that?

434
00:21:01,758 --> 00:21:03,260
If you could change form

435
00:21:03,343 --> 00:21:06,179
why didn't you change it
in the one place that counts?

436
00:21:06,388 --> 00:21:07,806
(ALL CHEERING)

437
00:21:14,855 --> 00:21:16,523
(BENDER HUMMING)

438
00:21:17,274 --> 00:21:19,568
Thanks for saving me
from that creep, Fry.

439
00:21:19,651 --> 00:21:21,320
Hey, that's what I do.

440
00:21:21,403 --> 00:21:24,573
I guess I was so desperate
to find out who I really was

441
00:21:24,656 --> 00:21:26,491
I forgot who I really was.

442
00:21:26,575 --> 00:21:27,868
No harm done.

443
00:21:27,951 --> 00:21:30,203
In the many decades
you'll work to repay me

444
00:21:30,287 --> 00:21:32,706
for that shipment of popcorn
you destroyed

445
00:21:32,789 --> 00:21:36,209
you'll have plenty of time
to search for your true home.

446
00:21:36,293 --> 00:21:37,294
Yeah.

447
00:21:37,377 --> 00:21:40,714
I mean, how many planets
can there be?

448
00:21:54,853 --> 00:21:56,855
(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)