1
00:00:01,989 --> 00:00:05,909
Futurama is brought to you
by...Molten Boron.

2
00:00:05,993 --> 00:00:08,870
Nobody doesn't like Molten Boron

3
00:00:42,821 --> 00:00:44,615
I hate the Planet of the Moochers.

4
00:00:44,698 --> 00:00:46,950
They take you out for a drink,
but when the check comes

5
00:00:47,034 --> 00:00:48,785
their wallet's always in their other pants

6
00:00:48,869 --> 00:00:50,078
which they borrowed from me.

7
00:00:51,413 --> 00:00:52,414
Dinner ready?

8
00:00:52,497 --> 00:00:55,167
Those lousy moochers
cleaned out our pantry.

9
00:00:55,250 --> 00:00:59,504
All they left was baking soda and capers
And here it is.

10
00:01:00,964 --> 00:01:04,301
Great. We're two days from Earth
with no food.

11
00:01:04,384 --> 00:01:07,763
Problem solved. You two fight to the death
and I'll cook the loser.

12
00:01:07,846 --> 00:01:09,514
Work his gut. I like it tender.

13
00:01:09,598 --> 00:01:11,683
Maybe that planet over there
has a drive-thru.

14
00:01:11,767 --> 00:01:14,853
A Burger Jerk or a Fishy Joe's
or a Chiseler or something.

15
00:01:14,937 --> 00:01:17,981
Don't get your hopes up.
We're a billion miles from nowhere.

16
00:01:18,065 --> 00:01:20,901
Yeah, it's probably
only got a Howard Johnson's.

17
00:01:25,948 --> 00:01:30,077
Well, it's a type "M" planet,
so it should at least have roddenberries.

18
00:01:30,160 --> 00:01:31,536
I'm experienced at foraging.

19
00:01:31,620 --> 00:01:33,997
I used to find edible mushrooms
on my bath mat.

20
00:01:34,081 --> 00:01:35,165
I found some rocks.

21
00:01:35,249 --> 00:01:37,292
- You guys eat rocks, right?
- No.

22
00:01:37,376 --> 00:01:40,087
Not even if they're sautéed in
a little mud?

23
00:01:40,170 --> 00:01:43,048
Here's something. It looks like
a ditch full of fried shrimp.

24
00:01:43,131 --> 00:01:44,216
What are you? Blind?

25
00:01:44,299 --> 00:01:46,843
It looks more like a hole
full of fried prawns.

26
00:01:52,474 --> 00:01:55,394
This thing I wear on my wrist
says they're not poisonous.

27
00:01:57,854 --> 00:01:59,231
Well, how are they?

28
00:02:05,862 --> 00:02:06,863
They're great.

29
00:02:07,864 --> 00:02:10,033
They're like sex, except I'm having them.

30
00:02:10,659 --> 00:02:13,161
You know what these
would go great with? Rocks.

31
00:02:13,245 --> 00:02:14,496
Look, here's more.

32
00:02:14,580 --> 00:02:15,872
The planet's covered with them.

33
00:02:15,956 --> 00:02:17,749
Let's bring back a couple of pocketfuls.

34
00:02:17,833 --> 00:02:19,334
No, a whole Bender-ful.

35
00:02:19,418 --> 00:02:21,253
No, only what we need.

36
00:02:21,336 --> 00:02:22,337
Stuff the ship.

37
00:02:28,635 --> 00:02:31,638
Planet Express ship,
you are cleared to land.

38
00:02:31,722 --> 00:02:32,973
Roger.

39
00:02:38,103 --> 00:02:40,731
Oh, mon, I'm inhaling these things.

40
00:02:40,814 --> 00:02:43,150
You guys scored some primo stuff here.

41
00:02:44,443 --> 00:02:47,112
They're tastier
than an unguarded penguin nest.

42
00:02:47,195 --> 00:02:48,614
What do you call them?

43
00:02:48,697 --> 00:02:50,073
We haven't thought of a name yet.

44
00:02:50,157 --> 00:02:51,575
They're tasty, right?

45
00:02:51,658 --> 00:02:53,076
Let's call them tasticles.

46
00:02:54,661 --> 00:02:56,705
- We can't call them that.
- Why not?

47
00:02:56,788 --> 00:02:57,789
It sounds too much

48
00:02:57,873 --> 00:03:00,417
Like those frozen Rocky Mountain oysters
on a stick.

49
00:03:00,500 --> 00:03:02,085
You know, testsicles.

50
00:03:02,878 --> 00:03:06,340
According to government records
the only names not yet trademarked

51
00:03:06,423 --> 00:03:08,842
are Popplers and Zitsels.

52
00:03:08,926 --> 00:03:10,594
I know! We'll call them popplers.

53
00:03:11,595 --> 00:03:12,596
You sure picked it.

54
00:03:12,679 --> 00:03:13,680
Swish.

55
00:03:14,723 --> 00:03:17,726
Call them what you want.
I call them a free meal.

56
00:03:18,769 --> 00:03:19,770
Whoa, whoa, whoa.

57
00:03:19,853 --> 00:03:21,355
Slow down there, Sigmund.

58
00:03:21,438 --> 00:03:24,483
I can't stand idly by
while poor people get free food.

59
00:03:24,566 --> 00:03:25,859
We gotta sell these things.

60
00:03:25,943 --> 00:03:27,277
- Yeah!
- Good idea.

61
00:03:27,361 --> 00:03:28,862
Bender's a genius!

62
00:03:32,908 --> 00:03:34,576
Hey! Business is great.

63
00:03:34,952 --> 00:03:37,996
Great is okay, but amazing would be great.

64
00:03:39,206 --> 00:03:42,251
Please, don't push.
There's hot dogs for everyone.

65
00:03:45,045 --> 00:03:48,465
Hey, mac, where do you want
those rat droppings you ordered?

66
00:03:52,886 --> 00:03:53,887
Wait a minute.

67
00:03:53,971 --> 00:03:56,390
You're not the guy
who delivers the rat droppings.

68
00:03:57,808 --> 00:04:00,143
What are you selling? Popplers?
Never heard of 'em.

69
00:04:00,227 --> 00:04:01,770
Eat it or beat it.

70
00:04:03,021 --> 00:04:04,022
Mmm, mmm.

71
00:04:04,106 --> 00:04:05,440
These are great.

72
00:04:05,524 --> 00:04:07,776
Boys, this is your lucky day.

73
00:04:07,859 --> 00:04:09,278
I'm Joe Gillman.

74
00:04:09,361 --> 00:04:10,487
Wow.

75
00:04:10,612 --> 00:04:12,656
You're some guy who eats at Fishy Joe's?

76
00:04:12,739 --> 00:04:13,782
Hell, no.

77
00:04:13,865 --> 00:04:15,242
I am Fishy Joe.

78
00:04:15,325 --> 00:04:18,996
I've got a fast-food franchise
on every planet in the known universe

79
00:04:19,079 --> 00:04:20,706
Except McPluto.

80
00:04:20,789 --> 00:04:24,626
Hey, Fishy, I've been meaning to write you
about your in-store kiddie parks.

81
00:04:24,710 --> 00:04:26,670
The slides won't support an adult robot.

82
00:04:26,753 --> 00:04:28,171
Good point. Not interested.

83
00:04:28,255 --> 00:04:30,007
But these popplers, these are great.

84
00:04:30,090 --> 00:04:31,258
How much you sell them for?

85
00:04:31,341 --> 00:04:32,342
A dollar a dozen.

86
00:04:32,426 --> 00:04:33,969
You'll never make money that way.

87
00:04:34,052 --> 00:04:37,306
You supply them to me
and I'll sell them for two bucks a dozen

88
00:04:37,389 --> 00:04:38,557
at my restaurants.

89
00:04:38,640 --> 00:04:40,559
I'll even pay you a dollar a dozen.

90
00:04:40,642 --> 00:04:42,019
Yes! I'm going to be rich!

91
00:04:42,102 --> 00:04:44,271
You, too, but it's hard
to get excited about that.

92
00:04:44,354 --> 00:04:45,355
How do we sign?

93
00:04:48,317 --> 00:04:50,360
Pop a poppler in your mouth

94
00:04:50,485 --> 00:04:52,905
When you come to Fishy Joe's
What they're made of is a mystery

95
00:04:52,988 --> 00:04:55,407
Where they come from, no one knows
You can pick 'em, you can lick 'em

96
00:04:55,490 --> 00:04:57,701
You can chew 'em, you can stick 'em
If you promise not to sue us

97
00:04:57,784 --> 00:04:59,202
You can shove one up your nose.

98
00:05:06,877 --> 00:05:08,253
I can't pay.

99
00:05:23,518 --> 00:05:27,147
Leela, that's the second billboard
you crashed into this week.

100
00:05:27,230 --> 00:05:31,151
Sorry. I was distracted
by those protesters outside our building.

101
00:05:41,620 --> 00:05:44,289
Hey, unless this is a nude love-in

102
00:05:44,373 --> 00:05:46,083
get the hell off my property.

103
00:05:46,833 --> 00:05:49,544
You can't own property, man.

104
00:05:49,628 --> 00:05:52,798
I can, but that's because
I'm not a penniless hippie.

105
00:05:52,881 --> 00:05:54,383
What do you people want?

106
00:05:54,466 --> 00:05:57,886
We're with Mankind
for Ethical Animal Treatment.

107
00:05:57,970 --> 00:06:00,013
Popplers are living creatures.

108
00:06:00,097 --> 00:06:02,683
You've got to stop
harvesting them for food.

109
00:06:02,766 --> 00:06:03,767
Or what?

110
00:06:04,101 --> 00:06:06,478
Or we'll boycott Fishy Joe's.

111
00:06:06,561 --> 00:06:09,273
You're vegetarians. Who cares what you do?

112
00:06:09,356 --> 00:06:10,691
Shut up!

113
00:06:10,774 --> 00:06:13,360
Animals eat other animals. It's nature.

114
00:06:13,443 --> 00:06:16,530
No, it isn't.
We taught a lion to eat tofu.

115
00:06:19,658 --> 00:06:23,036
The point is, you shouldn't
eat things that feel pain.

116
00:06:24,204 --> 00:06:25,831
Okay, we won't eat you.

117
00:06:25,914 --> 00:06:27,416
I'll go get some more bricks.

118
00:06:29,334 --> 00:06:32,296
Fry, I wish you'd throw out
these week-old popplers.

119
00:06:32,379 --> 00:06:34,089
They're getting big and scaly.

120
00:06:34,548 --> 00:06:35,841
There's one left.

121
00:06:36,633 --> 00:06:38,427
Mama.

122
00:06:51,356 --> 00:06:53,483
Stop! Stop eating popplers.

123
00:06:54,109 --> 00:06:55,485
- Why?
- My booze!

124
00:06:55,569 --> 00:06:57,112
Popplers are intelligent.

125
00:06:57,195 --> 00:06:59,281
This one called me "mama."

126
00:06:59,364 --> 00:07:01,033
Congratulations.

127
00:07:01,116 --> 00:07:03,201
I assume Amy is the father.

128
00:07:03,285 --> 00:07:04,953
Popplers can't talk.

129
00:07:05,037 --> 00:07:06,413
Leela must be hallucinating

130
00:07:06,496 --> 00:07:08,123
from not eating enough popplers.

131
00:07:08,206 --> 00:07:09,416
Here, eat some now.

132
00:07:09,499 --> 00:07:10,500
No!

133
00:07:10,584 --> 00:07:12,794
- I said eat! Come on! Mangia!
- No!

134
00:07:13,545 --> 00:07:15,547
Sorry, babies.

135
00:07:15,631 --> 00:07:17,424
Leela, maybe you should lie down.

136
00:07:17,507 --> 00:07:19,509
Yes, listen to the father.

137
00:07:19,593 --> 00:07:21,428
I'm telling you it spoke to me.

138
00:07:21,511 --> 00:07:22,846
Come on, little poppler.

139
00:07:22,930 --> 00:07:23,931
Say "mama."

140
00:07:24,973 --> 00:07:28,936
Look, Leela, even if you heard one talk
that doesn't mean it's intelligent.

141
00:07:29,019 --> 00:07:31,438
I mean, parrots talk,
and we eat them, right?

142
00:07:31,521 --> 00:07:34,983
Yeah, maybe it just learned
to talk as a parlor trick, like Fry.

143
00:07:35,067 --> 00:07:36,526
Like Fry, like Fry.

144
00:07:36,610 --> 00:07:38,904
There's one way, and only one way

145
00:07:38,987 --> 00:07:41,323
to determine if
an animal is intelligent...

146
00:07:41,949 --> 00:07:43,784
Dissect its brain.

147
00:07:43,867 --> 00:07:45,369
No! Mama!

148
00:07:45,452 --> 00:07:46,954
Stop grandpa!

149
00:07:48,330 --> 00:07:49,414
Enough chitchat.

150
00:07:49,498 --> 00:07:51,208
Restrain the specimen.

151
00:07:54,294 --> 00:07:56,004
...Some of that special sauce.

152
00:08:03,303 --> 00:08:06,390
Stop eating popplers! They can talk!

153
00:08:06,473 --> 00:08:09,059
Don't stop to talk. Eat popplers!

154
00:08:09,142 --> 00:08:10,394
Hey, cut it out.

155
00:08:10,477 --> 00:08:12,604
Take a coupon. Cut it out.

156
00:08:12,688 --> 00:08:14,147
Ow! Ooh! Ow!

157
00:08:20,153 --> 00:08:21,738
People, I won't let you enter.

158
00:08:21,822 --> 00:08:24,575
Popplers are as intelligent as you or me.

159
00:08:24,658 --> 00:08:25,742
You, maybe.

160
00:08:30,497 --> 00:08:33,041
Hear me! Hear me!

161
00:08:33,125 --> 00:08:34,876
Stop eating popplers!

162
00:08:34,960 --> 00:08:37,421
Stop eating them with honey mustard sauce!

163
00:08:37,504 --> 00:08:40,632
Stop eating them
with tangy sweet-and-sour sauce.

164
00:08:40,716 --> 00:08:43,552
Stop eating the new fiesta poppler salad.

165
00:08:43,927 --> 00:08:47,014
Stop taking advantage of the
money-saving 12-pack.

166
00:08:50,726 --> 00:08:55,355
Stop enjoying popplers on the patio,
in the car, or on the boat.

167
00:08:55,480 --> 00:08:57,441
Wherever good times are had.

168
00:08:58,025 --> 00:08:59,234
Ow!

169
00:09:04,239 --> 00:09:06,158
Tonight, on Date Night:

170
00:09:06,283 --> 00:09:08,076
"Popplers; eating them."

171
00:09:08,160 --> 00:09:09,286
Is it all right to?

172
00:09:09,369 --> 00:09:12,122
We have with us the C.E.O. Of Fishy Joe's

173
00:09:12,205 --> 00:09:14,041
Mr. Fishy Joseph Gillman,

174
00:09:14,124 --> 00:09:17,836
noted anti-eating activist,
Free Waterfall, Jr.,

175
00:09:17,920 --> 00:09:21,298
and the discoverer of popplers,
Captain Turanga Leela.

176
00:09:21,381 --> 00:09:22,382
Turanga?

177
00:09:22,466 --> 00:09:23,508
That's her name, Phillip.

178
00:09:23,592 --> 00:09:24,593
Phillip?

179
00:09:24,676 --> 00:09:27,888
Fishy Joe, is it wrong
to eat intelligent animals?

180
00:09:27,971 --> 00:09:29,556
Absolutely not, Linda.

181
00:09:29,681 --> 00:09:31,725
I don't think anyone's here
to make that claim.

182
00:09:31,808 --> 00:09:33,435
- I am.
- Me, too.

183
00:09:33,518 --> 00:09:34,519
- Listen...
- Shut up.

184
00:09:34,603 --> 00:09:36,939
We're talking about a snack
that's low in fat...

185
00:09:37,022 --> 00:09:38,273
- Shut up.
- ...and high in profit.

186
00:09:38,357 --> 00:09:40,609
You're crazy, man. He is crazy.

187
00:09:40,692 --> 00:09:43,946
There's not even any strong evidence
that these popplers are intelligent.

188
00:09:44,029 --> 00:09:45,489
- Shut up, shut up.
- That's not true.

189
00:09:45,572 --> 00:09:48,116
- I have one right here that can talk.
- Shut up.

190
00:09:48,200 --> 00:09:50,577
- Come on. Say "mama."
- Caca.

191
00:09:50,661 --> 00:09:52,079
Okay, we'll have to bleep that.

192
00:09:52,162 --> 00:09:55,207
- I'm not saying eating meat is wrong.
- Shut up.

193
00:09:55,290 --> 00:09:58,043
- No one's here to make that claim.
- I am.

194
00:09:58,126 --> 00:10:00,420
But eating an intelligent animal
is different.

195
00:10:00,504 --> 00:10:01,713
Shut up, shut up, shut up.

196
00:10:01,797 --> 00:10:04,258
Don't force your tired philosophy on us.

197
00:10:04,341 --> 00:10:06,510
I mean, the only reason
we don't eat people

198
00:10:06,593 --> 00:10:07,970
is because it tastes lousy.

199
00:10:08,053 --> 00:10:09,054
You're all nuts.

200
00:10:09,137 --> 00:10:10,639
Shut up. Let me talk.

201
00:10:10,722 --> 00:10:11,890
You shut up, please.

202
00:10:11,974 --> 00:10:13,475
No, you shut up, please.

203
00:10:13,558 --> 00:10:16,812
Popplers are no smarter than
any other animal I've served,

204
00:10:16,895 --> 00:10:18,188
and that includes cats.

205
00:10:18,272 --> 00:10:19,398
Caca-head.

206
00:10:19,481 --> 00:10:21,650
Mean old caca-head.

207
00:10:21,733 --> 00:10:23,360
Sir, I'm making a point.

208
00:10:23,443 --> 00:10:26,029
If these gutter-mouth creatures
are so smart,

209
00:10:26,113 --> 00:10:27,864
why don't they defend themselves?

210
00:10:29,825 --> 00:10:30,867
Stop it.

211
00:10:30,951 --> 00:10:32,869
I call murder on that.

212
00:10:33,579 --> 00:10:37,207
Look, I'm willing to grant
that it's murder. The real issue is...

213
00:10:38,166 --> 00:10:39,668
...who's going to stop me?

214
00:10:49,970 --> 00:10:53,223
We seem to be experiencing
technical difficulties.

215
00:10:53,307 --> 00:10:55,475
And crap like I've never seen.

216
00:10:56,560 --> 00:10:58,687
People of earth, I am Lrrr

217
00:10:58,770 --> 00:11:00,856
of the Planet Omicron Persei 8.

218
00:11:02,441 --> 00:11:04,401
Turn down the TV, Ndunda.

219
00:11:04,484 --> 00:11:06,320
Dear lord, they're back.

220
00:11:06,403 --> 00:11:07,571
We're doomed.

221
00:11:07,654 --> 00:11:08,947
Doomed!

222
00:11:09,114 --> 00:11:10,657
)

223
00:11:10,741 --> 00:11:14,161
Doomed!

224
00:11:14,244 --> 00:11:16,955
Now then, the creatures you call popplers

225
00:11:17,039 --> 00:11:19,374
come from a nursery planet in our sector.

226
00:11:20,042 --> 00:11:22,961
You monsters have been eating our babies.

227
00:11:28,133 --> 00:11:29,718
We demand justice.

228
00:11:29,801 --> 00:11:34,306
As you ate our children,
so shall you be eaten by us.

229
00:11:34,389 --> 00:11:38,185
We will begin with the firemen,
then the math teachers,

230
00:11:38,268 --> 00:11:42,022
and so on in that fashion
until everyone is eaten.

231
00:11:45,943 --> 00:11:47,486
Transmission over.

232
00:11:49,529 --> 00:11:50,948
Well, that went okay.

233
00:11:51,031 --> 00:11:53,325
I tell you...
when you know you can't scratch

234
00:11:53,408 --> 00:11:56,328
that's when you really have to, eh?

235
00:11:56,411 --> 00:11:58,330
Oh, yeah, oh, that feels a lot better.

236
00:11:58,413 --> 00:12:00,832
What? It's still on? Oh!

237
00:12:04,503 --> 00:12:07,047
As chief negotiator,
I speak for all of Earth

238
00:12:07,130 --> 00:12:10,592
when I mourn the
regrettable loss of the omicronian young.

239
00:12:10,676 --> 00:12:12,386
We share your pain.

240
00:12:14,263 --> 00:12:15,806
Mmm.

241
00:12:15,889 --> 00:12:18,433
If we could undo the damage...

242
00:12:21,061 --> 00:12:22,854
These would be great with gwack-a-mole.

243
00:12:22,938 --> 00:12:24,189
Stop eating our young!

244
00:12:24,273 --> 00:12:25,732
And it's pronounced guacamole!

245
00:12:26,733 --> 00:12:28,443
All right. I'm putting them away.

246
00:12:32,864 --> 00:12:34,449
Now, what is it you want?

247
00:12:34,533 --> 00:12:36,076
We demand...

248
00:12:36,159 --> 00:12:37,828
We demand to eat

249
00:12:37,911 --> 00:12:39,955
one human for each omicronian
that was eaten.

250
00:12:40,038 --> 00:12:41,999
Fair enough. How many is that?

251
00:12:42,916 --> 00:12:45,460
Hundred and ninety-eight billion, Sir.

252
00:12:45,544 --> 00:12:46,545
Very well.

253
00:12:46,628 --> 00:12:50,465
You will provide us
with 198 billion humans

254
00:12:50,549 --> 00:12:51,925
And small fries.

255
00:12:52,009 --> 00:12:53,135
Lrrr!

256
00:12:53,218 --> 00:12:55,387
Oh, all right, cottage cheese.

257
00:12:55,470 --> 00:12:58,515
Sir, there aren't
that many human beings.

258
00:12:58,599 --> 00:12:59,850
A thought occurs.

259
00:12:59,933 --> 00:13:01,727
There aren't that many humans.

260
00:13:01,810 --> 00:13:04,354
We'll wait a few weeks
while you shore up the numbers.

261
00:13:05,188 --> 00:13:07,941
One hundred ninety-eight billion babies
in a few weeks.

262
00:13:08,025 --> 00:13:11,820
We'll need an army of super-virile men
scoring 'round the clock!

263
00:13:11,904 --> 00:13:13,238
I'll do my part.

264
00:13:13,322 --> 00:13:15,073
Kif, clear my schedule.

265
00:13:19,328 --> 00:13:22,289
I wish they'd just wipe out humanity
and get it over with.

266
00:13:22,372 --> 00:13:24,041
It's the waiting I can't stand.

267
00:13:24,124 --> 00:13:25,208
That's stupid.

268
00:13:31,924 --> 00:13:35,218
My fellow earthlings,
we have reached an agreement.

269
00:13:35,302 --> 00:13:38,055
Using the twin guns of grace and tact

270
00:13:38,138 --> 00:13:41,934
I blasted our worthless enemies
with a fair compromise.

271
00:13:43,393 --> 00:13:45,103
They will not eat everyone on Earth.

272
00:13:45,187 --> 00:13:48,065
I filled up on nuts at the negotiation.

273
00:13:48,148 --> 00:13:51,985
Instead, they will eat only
a single human of their choice.

274
00:13:52,069 --> 00:13:55,822
We choose to eat the first earthling
who ate our offspring.

275
00:13:55,906 --> 00:13:57,199
Here is the culprit

276
00:13:57,282 --> 00:13:59,618
As photographed
by our nanny-cam satellite.

277
00:14:01,370 --> 00:14:02,955
She must be sacrificed,

278
00:14:03,038 --> 00:14:06,041
but the rest of you shall be spared.

279
00:14:08,460 --> 00:14:09,711
Boo!

280
00:14:09,795 --> 00:14:11,838
Boo!

281
00:14:23,850 --> 00:14:29,064
Tonight the world watches in horror
as an earthling is eaten alive

282
00:14:29,147 --> 00:14:30,524
on network television.

283
00:14:30,607 --> 00:14:35,946
This grim scene of unimaginable carnage
is brought to you by Fishy Joe's.

284
00:14:36,029 --> 00:14:38,282
Try our new extreme walrus juice.

285
00:14:38,949 --> 00:14:41,910
100% fresh-squeezed walrus.

286
00:14:41,994 --> 00:14:43,245
Ride the walrus.

287
00:14:43,328 --> 00:14:46,248
Ladies and gentlemen

288
00:14:46,331 --> 00:14:49,710
The omicronians!

289
00:14:52,045 --> 00:14:54,131
Greetings, earth morsels.

290
00:14:55,591 --> 00:14:57,050
You suck!

291
00:14:57,134 --> 00:14:58,218
Get a job!

292
00:14:58,302 --> 00:15:00,554
I'll miss you, Leela.

293
00:15:00,637 --> 00:15:03,056
I know you're just
a carbon-based life-form

294
00:15:03,140 --> 00:15:05,058
but I'll always think of you

295
00:15:05,142 --> 00:15:08,145
as a big pile of titanium.

296
00:15:08,228 --> 00:15:10,856
What Bender means is, you're really brave,

297
00:15:10,939 --> 00:15:13,525
and smart, and beautiful,
and a great friend.

298
00:15:13,609 --> 00:15:15,402
Just like titanium.

299
00:15:18,488 --> 00:15:20,198
This is all a big load.

300
00:15:20,282 --> 00:15:22,910
I was the one trying to save the popplers.

301
00:15:22,993 --> 00:15:25,662
You were sucking them down
like the fat hog you are,

302
00:15:25,746 --> 00:15:28,040
and you were stepping on them for fun.

303
00:15:29,458 --> 00:15:32,127
You both should be in here instead of me.

304
00:15:32,210 --> 00:15:34,296
Someone's acting awfully aluminum.

305
00:15:34,379 --> 00:15:36,381
Leela, my sweet, I've come to save you.

306
00:15:36,465 --> 00:15:38,050
I have a devious plan.

307
00:15:38,133 --> 00:15:41,595
Oh, great. Captain Moron has a plan.

308
00:15:41,678 --> 00:15:44,097
Why don't you tell it to wingus
and dingus here?

309
00:15:44,181 --> 00:15:45,766
Wingus, dingus, listen up.

310
00:15:45,849 --> 00:15:48,602
We're going to give the aliens
the old switcheroo.

311
00:15:48,685 --> 00:15:49,811
- You mean...
- Correct.

312
00:15:49,895 --> 00:15:51,355
I found a giant, hideous ape

313
00:15:51,438 --> 00:15:53,190
that looks exactly like Leela.

314
00:15:56,610 --> 00:15:58,654
It doesn't look anything like me.

315
00:15:58,737 --> 00:16:00,155
The hair is all wrong.

316
00:16:00,239 --> 00:16:02,699
Don't worry, Kif is an expert stylist,

317
00:16:02,783 --> 00:16:04,201
as you can plainly see.

318
00:16:04,284 --> 00:16:05,869
Mmm!

319
00:16:13,585 --> 00:16:16,129
You know, this might actually work.

320
00:16:16,213 --> 00:16:19,549
The omicronians seem to have trouble
telling one person from another.

321
00:16:19,633 --> 00:16:22,052
True. At the negotiations,
they thought Kif here

322
00:16:22,135 --> 00:16:25,013
was the statesman
and I was a jabbering mental patient.

323
00:16:25,097 --> 00:16:26,306
Isn't that right, Kif?

324
00:16:26,390 --> 00:16:28,809
Please, I'm creating.

325
00:16:31,603 --> 00:16:33,188
Voilà!

326
00:16:35,816 --> 00:16:37,401
- Bingo!
- That' Leela.

327
00:16:37,484 --> 00:16:38,819
I'm seeing double.

328
00:16:40,612 --> 00:16:41,947
I grow hungry.

329
00:16:42,030 --> 00:16:44,950
Bring on the one called "Leela."

330
00:16:45,033 --> 00:16:47,202
That comes with salad or soup.

331
00:16:47,286 --> 00:16:48,287
Salad.

332
00:16:48,370 --> 00:16:49,496
Ranch or vinaigrette?

333
00:16:49,580 --> 00:16:50,581
Vinaigrette.

334
00:16:50,664 --> 00:16:52,291
Balsamic or raspberry?

335
00:17:05,345 --> 00:17:06,763
People of earth...

336
00:17:06,847 --> 00:17:08,223
Shh!

337
00:17:10,183 --> 00:17:11,268
Hmm.

338
00:17:11,351 --> 00:17:14,730
Hmm. Mmm-hmm.

339
00:17:17,024 --> 00:17:19,568
Yes, this is the one, definitely.

340
00:17:19,651 --> 00:17:22,946
I recognize her slumping posture
and hairy knuckles.

341
00:17:33,206 --> 00:17:36,001
Would you like some human with your salt?

342
00:17:39,713 --> 00:17:40,714
This is it.

343
00:17:40,797 --> 00:17:43,008
If the aliens fall for Zapp's ploy

344
00:17:43,091 --> 00:17:44,718
the Earth will be saved.

345
00:17:44,801 --> 00:17:46,678
Brought to you by Fishy Joe's.

346
00:17:46,762 --> 00:17:47,930
"Ride the walrus."

347
00:17:53,518 --> 00:17:54,937
Wait! Stop!

348
00:17:55,020 --> 00:17:57,147
It's a trick! That's not Leela!

349
00:17:58,273 --> 00:18:00,400
What's happening? I'm losing the crowd.

350
00:18:00,484 --> 00:18:02,110
It's an orangutan.

351
00:18:02,194 --> 00:18:05,405
One of Mother Earth's
most precious creatures.

352
00:18:06,406 --> 00:18:08,075
Hmm.

353
00:18:11,495 --> 00:18:14,831
Why'd you open your bonghole,
you smelly hippie?

354
00:18:14,915 --> 00:18:18,585
You'd sacrifice a beautiful woman
to save a moderately attractive monkey?

355
00:18:18,669 --> 00:18:21,505
You must've smoked some bad granola.

356
00:18:21,588 --> 00:18:24,383
The one called "smelly hippie" is right.

357
00:18:24,466 --> 00:18:25,968
This is a monkey.

358
00:18:27,135 --> 00:18:29,179
Yes, definitely.

359
00:18:29,930 --> 00:18:31,807
Where is the real female?

360
00:18:31,890 --> 00:18:33,016
I'll never tell.

361
00:18:33,100 --> 00:18:34,685
Where is the real female?

362
00:18:34,768 --> 00:18:36,103
I'll get her for you.

363
00:18:37,813 --> 00:18:42,109
I realize this may hurt our chances
of consummating our relationship again.

364
00:18:42,192 --> 00:18:43,443
Go consummate yourself.

365
00:18:43,527 --> 00:18:45,737
Stop talking! You're getting cold!

366
00:18:46,905 --> 00:18:49,533
Please! I just paid off my car!

367
00:18:49,616 --> 00:18:51,702
- No!
- I can't look.

368
00:18:57,124 --> 00:18:58,333
Stop!

369
00:19:02,337 --> 00:19:04,047
People of Earth.

370
00:19:04,131 --> 00:19:08,093
I am Jrrr of the planet Omicron Persei 8.

371
00:19:08,176 --> 00:19:09,886
Could someone lower this thing for me?

372
00:19:10,887 --> 00:19:13,307
Now, then, if Leela gets eaten

373
00:19:13,390 --> 00:19:14,641
I get eaten!

374
00:19:15,934 --> 00:19:18,312
Little one, get out of there!

375
00:19:18,395 --> 00:19:20,439
I'm going to count to blarks.

376
00:19:20,522 --> 00:19:22,065
But elder one...

377
00:19:22,149 --> 00:19:26,945
Flingle, glorg, glorg-and-a-gloob...

378
00:19:27,029 --> 00:19:28,113
Hear me out!

379
00:19:28,196 --> 00:19:30,282
There are many good reasons to eat:

380
00:19:30,365 --> 00:19:32,910
Hunger, boredom,

381
00:19:32,993 --> 00:19:35,329
wanting to be the world's fattest man,

382
00:19:35,412 --> 00:19:36,788
but not revenge.

383
00:19:36,872 --> 00:19:38,707
Are we no better than they?

384
00:19:38,790 --> 00:19:41,335
Besides, Leela's my friend.

385
00:19:41,418 --> 00:19:43,128
Is this true, earthling?

386
00:19:44,838 --> 00:19:48,216
Leela's garbled words have opened my eyes.

387
00:19:53,764 --> 00:19:55,265
Okay, that's a start.

388
00:19:55,349 --> 00:19:57,392
That's very earth-friendly.

389
00:19:57,476 --> 00:19:59,645
Now, everyone join hands!

390
00:19:59,728 --> 00:20:00,979
Join hands, please!

391
00:20:01,063 --> 00:20:03,231
I'd like to lead you all in some swaying.

392
00:20:03,315 --> 00:20:04,524
Come on. Pay attention.

393
00:20:05,817 --> 00:20:07,527
I said do it!

394
00:20:07,611 --> 00:20:09,529
- Yeah.
- Is he your friend, too?

395
00:20:09,613 --> 00:20:10,864
No.

396
00:20:10,948 --> 00:20:11,990
Aah!

397
00:20:12,074 --> 00:20:13,492
This is not happening.

398
00:20:18,580 --> 00:20:21,333
I think there was
something funny in that hippie.

399
00:20:21,416 --> 00:20:23,085
Thank you, Jrrr.

400
00:20:23,418 --> 00:20:25,963
I hope you'll always
think of me as your mom.

401
00:20:26,046 --> 00:20:28,966
When my species grows up, we eat our moms.

402
00:20:29,049 --> 00:20:30,300
Whoop!

403
00:20:30,425 --> 00:20:31,885
People of earth...

404
00:20:31,969 --> 00:20:34,304
That hippie's starting to kick in.

405
00:20:34,805 --> 00:20:37,474
We've all learned
an important lesson today.

406
00:20:37,557 --> 00:20:39,726
I realize now that...

407
00:20:40,560 --> 00:20:43,897
Dude, my hands are huge.

408
00:20:46,358 --> 00:20:49,444
They can touch anything but themselves.

409
00:20:50,028 --> 00:20:51,113
Oh, wait.

410
00:20:51,196 --> 00:20:52,364
Let's go.

411
00:20:55,367 --> 00:20:56,660
Ooh.

412
00:20:56,743 --> 00:20:58,870
Hmm?

413
00:21:00,038 --> 00:21:01,999
Whoa-ho-ho.

414
00:21:02,082 --> 00:21:03,500
Whoo.

415
00:21:03,875 --> 00:21:05,127
Yeah...

416
00:21:09,715 --> 00:21:11,842
I feel like I'm flying.

417
00:21:17,347 --> 00:21:18,890
A toast to Leela.

418
00:21:18,974 --> 00:21:21,977
She showed us it's wrong
to eat certain things.

419
00:21:22,060 --> 00:21:23,937
- Hear, hear!
- Let's get drunk!

420
00:21:24,021 --> 00:21:25,480
Aw! Thanks, guys.

421
00:21:25,564 --> 00:21:27,608
- Pass the veal, please.
- Here you go.

422
00:21:27,858 --> 00:21:30,444
Mmm. Let me get some of that suckling pig.

423
00:21:31,445 --> 00:21:32,487
Who wants dolphin?

424
00:21:32,613 --> 00:21:34,364
Dolphin?

425
00:21:34,448 --> 00:21:35,949
But dolphins are intelligent.

426
00:21:36,033 --> 00:21:37,117
Not this one.

427
00:21:37,200 --> 00:21:39,494
He blew all his money
on instant lottery tickets.

428
00:21:39,953 --> 00:21:41,204
- Oh!
- That's different.

429
00:21:41,288 --> 00:21:42,414
Pass the blowhole.

430
00:21:42,497 --> 00:21:43,498
Can I have a fluke?

431
00:21:43,582 --> 00:21:45,167
Hey, quit hoggin' the bottlenose.

432
00:21:45,250 --> 00:21:48,128
Toss me the speech center of the brain.