1
00:00:19,703 --> 00:00:23,873
MAN: It's The Futurama
Holiday Spectacular
brought to you by...

2
00:00:24,082 --> 00:00:26,250
(READING)

3
00:00:27,628 --> 00:00:29,712
Ah, the Xmas season.

4
00:00:29,880 --> 00:00:31,798
Who wants a delicious
unshelled nut?

5
00:00:31,882 --> 00:00:34,008
Ooh, I'll have one.

6
00:00:39,389 --> 00:00:41,349
It's "nut" so good.

7
00:00:41,767 --> 00:00:42,892
(GROANS)

8
00:00:43,101 --> 00:00:46,729
What's wrong, Fry?
Are you regretting
another wasted year?

9
00:00:47,189 --> 00:00:49,273
I don't know.
Something about Xmas

10
00:00:49,358 --> 00:00:50,942
just doesn't feel
like Christmas.

11
00:00:51,026 --> 00:00:52,485
(ALARM BLARING)

12
00:00:52,736 --> 00:00:55,863
Santa's coming!
Initiate defenses!

13
00:01:05,374 --> 00:01:08,334
God rest
ye merry gentlemen

14
00:01:08,460 --> 00:01:10,169
in peace.

15
00:01:14,258 --> 00:01:18,427
Can someone please explain
how you celebrate
this crazy holiday?

16
00:01:18,679 --> 00:01:19,929
Preferably in song.

17
00:01:21,974 --> 00:01:25,059
It's the violentest
season of the year

18
00:01:25,769 --> 00:01:29,021
When Kringle-bot
come dispensing
mugs of Xmas fear

19
00:01:29,773 --> 00:01:32,316
Sugar plummy
visions will be dancing
in your head

20
00:01:32,401 --> 00:01:35,361
When I cane you
from the comfort of my sled

21
00:01:36,363 --> 00:01:39,031
On Xmas Eve,
we don our gay apparel

22
00:01:39,950 --> 00:01:43,077
Kevlar vests,
asbestos stockings
and a barrel

23
00:01:43,161 --> 00:01:46,539
And if
Grandma's Xmas fruitcake
finally reaches critical mass

24
00:01:46,623 --> 00:01:49,208
It can be re-gifted
straight to Santa's ass

25
00:01:51,795 --> 00:01:55,256
But the ornamental armaments
are merely superficial

26
00:01:55,465 --> 00:01:58,718
The tinsel and the trappings
are just icing on the missile

27
00:01:59,136 --> 00:02:03,306
The one thing that you need
to make your Xmas
Day splendiferous

28
00:02:03,390 --> 00:02:07,351
Is a pine tree
A pine tree that's coniferous

29
00:02:08,061 --> 00:02:11,230
We have to have a pine tree
that's coniferous

30
00:02:12,316 --> 00:02:13,649
You're welcome.

31
00:02:14,651 --> 00:02:18,321
You know, Santa may
have killed Scruffy,
but he makes a good point.

32
00:02:18,530 --> 00:02:21,073
What we need is an
old-fashioned pine tree.

33
00:02:21,241 --> 00:02:22,366
Cram it, Virginia.

34
00:02:22,451 --> 00:02:25,953
Pine trees have been
extinct for over 800 years.

35
00:02:26,079 --> 00:02:28,080
Professor,
maybe there's some way

36
00:02:28,165 --> 00:02:30,124
to bring the pine
trees back to life.

37
00:02:30,208 --> 00:02:32,084
Like we did with
the barking snakes.

38
00:02:32,169 --> 00:02:33,502
(BARKING)

39
00:02:34,004 --> 00:02:35,922
Pine trees aren't
barking snakes.

40
00:02:36,006 --> 00:02:38,883
They won't just
turn up in a salad
at Olive Garden.

41
00:02:38,967 --> 00:02:43,304
But there is one
hope and, as usual,
it's Norwegian.

42
00:02:49,811 --> 00:02:53,439
(CREW SCREAMING)

43
00:02:57,444 --> 00:02:58,444
Behold!

44
00:02:58,695 --> 00:03:01,822
The Svalbard
Global Seed Vault.

45
00:03:01,949 --> 00:03:07,119
Since 2008,
the vault has preserved seeds
of every known plant species,

46
00:03:07,204 --> 00:03:08,829
in case of extinction.

47
00:03:08,914 --> 00:03:10,665
And I brought
a few seeds of my own.

48
00:03:11,291 --> 00:03:12,667
(BARKING)

49
00:03:13,043 --> 00:03:16,295
Halt! What's your
business pokey-poking
about the seed vault?

50
00:03:16,380 --> 00:03:19,340
Guardian of mankind's
precious botanical
heritage there?

51
00:03:19,424 --> 00:03:22,301
We just want to come in
and rummage about a bit.

52
00:03:22,386 --> 00:03:25,054
Oh, so... Okay.

53
00:03:25,973 --> 00:03:28,557
Yo, ABBA,
what's that next door?

54
00:03:29,685 --> 00:03:32,144
That's the Germ
Warfare Repository.

55
00:03:32,270 --> 00:03:33,396
It's so close.

56
00:03:33,563 --> 00:03:36,649
Is there any chance
of cross-contamination?

57
00:03:36,858 --> 00:03:38,359
No.

58
00:03:40,195 --> 00:03:41,862
Now, your pine trees
were all chopped down

59
00:03:41,947 --> 00:03:44,991
to make emergency toilet paper
during the Fifty-Year Squirts.

60
00:03:45,075 --> 00:03:47,410
Lucky the seeds have
been preserved here
in the vault there.

61
00:03:47,577 --> 00:03:49,328
What's that splork on them?

62
00:03:49,579 --> 00:03:51,747
It's not germs, is it?

63
00:03:51,832 --> 00:03:52,832
No.

64
00:04:05,178 --> 00:04:07,680
Now that's a tree
worth chopping down.

65
00:04:07,764 --> 00:04:10,433
Indeed,
'tis a lovely tree.

66
00:04:10,559 --> 00:04:13,978
'Twill truly be my
finest Xmas ever.
(SCREAMS)

67
00:04:15,188 --> 00:04:16,188
(EXCLAIMING)

68
00:04:16,440 --> 00:04:18,232
That's what my
poll numbers need.

69
00:04:18,316 --> 00:04:21,610
Happy voters enjoying
some holiday cheer.

70
00:04:21,695 --> 00:04:25,948
As your vice-president,
I order you to
steal that tree.

71
00:04:27,617 --> 00:04:29,285
My fellow Earthicans,

72
00:04:29,369 --> 00:04:32,830
welcome to
the annual White House
Xmas-tree lighting,

73
00:04:32,956 --> 00:04:36,167
brought to you by
Gunderson's Nuts.

74
00:04:36,376 --> 00:04:37,376
WOMAN: Gunderson!

75
00:04:40,255 --> 00:04:41,797
(ALL CHEERING)

76
00:04:49,473 --> 00:04:52,516
Oh, no!
Could the seed
have been contaminated

77
00:04:52,601 --> 00:04:54,852
by a virus from
the germ vault?

78
00:04:54,978 --> 00:04:56,479
Yeah, I suppose.

79
00:04:56,563 --> 00:04:59,899
Wait.
This could be a good thing.
That weaponized virus

80
00:04:59,983 --> 00:05:02,735
made the sickly, little tree
grow big and strong.

81
00:05:07,866 --> 00:05:09,075
(PEOPLE YELLING)

82
00:05:16,750 --> 00:05:18,667
Wait. This could be
a good thing.

83
00:05:18,752 --> 00:05:20,336
Reforestation has begun.

84
00:05:23,006 --> 00:05:24,673
Geez, with these...

85
00:05:26,259 --> 00:05:27,635
(ALL EXCLAIMING)

86
00:05:44,861 --> 00:05:47,071
Arguably, this could
be a good thing.

87
00:05:47,155 --> 00:05:50,032
The planet has returned
to its primeval state.

88
00:05:50,117 --> 00:05:53,619
Earth is just the way it was
before the white man came.

89
00:05:53,703 --> 00:05:55,871
(DEVICE POWERING UP)
Good news.

90
00:05:56,039 --> 00:05:58,791
All these pine trees are
fighting global warming

91
00:05:58,875 --> 00:06:00,292
by producing oxygen.

92
00:06:00,377 --> 00:06:01,460
Happy now, Gore?

93
00:06:01,545 --> 00:06:02,586
Yeah.

94
00:06:02,671 --> 00:06:05,464
But I'd be happier if
I had a set of lungs.

95
00:06:06,550 --> 00:06:10,052
Wait a second.
Oxygen levels are
rising too rapidly.

96
00:06:10,262 --> 00:06:14,640
10%, 20%, 60%.

97
00:06:14,766 --> 00:06:16,392
As long as it
doesn't hit 70.

98
00:06:16,560 --> 00:06:18,227
80%.

99
00:06:18,395 --> 00:06:21,105
You know, I don't
recall having done
anything for a while,

100
00:06:21,189 --> 00:06:23,607
but I still feel
I deserve a smoke.

101
00:06:24,901 --> 00:06:25,943
(ALL GASP)

102
00:06:26,027 --> 00:06:28,737
Hey, cool.
The air is on fire.

103
00:06:33,910 --> 00:06:35,995
Ho, ho, ho.

104
00:06:36,079 --> 00:06:37,788
Everyone's dead.

105
00:06:37,873 --> 00:06:42,751
Stay tuned for another tale
of holiday hilarity.

106
00:06:46,214 --> 00:06:49,008
MAN: Now back to
the Gunderson's Nuts

107
00:06:49,134 --> 00:06:51,927
Holiday Spectacular
featuring Futurama.

108
00:06:52,304 --> 00:06:55,014
Okay, crew.
Xmas break is over.

109
00:06:55,098 --> 00:06:58,267
It's time to
destroy these gifts
we forgot to deliver.

110
00:06:58,351 --> 00:06:59,810
Whoa, whoa, whoa!

111
00:06:59,895 --> 00:07:02,354
How come we get
off for every dumb
human holiday,

112
00:07:02,439 --> 00:07:04,523
but not for
robot holidays?

113
00:07:04,608 --> 00:07:06,567
Oh, Lord.
Not Robanukah.

114
00:07:06,651 --> 00:07:08,569
I'm talking about Robanukah,

115
00:07:08,653 --> 00:07:11,906
the holiest six
and a half weeks
in the robot calendar.

116
00:07:12,490 --> 00:07:16,452
That's just a fake holiday
you make up every year
to get out of work.

117
00:07:16,536 --> 00:07:18,078
Yeah. If it's real,

118
00:07:18,163 --> 00:07:20,956
how come there's no song
that explains how
to celebrate it?

119
00:07:21,041 --> 00:07:22,541
Because there is.

120
00:07:22,792 --> 00:07:24,668
Hit it.
Hit what?

121
00:07:24,836 --> 00:07:26,962
I placed instruments
under your seats.

122
00:07:27,047 --> 00:07:28,964
Play them
or I'll break them
over your heads.

123
00:07:30,884 --> 00:07:33,802
(SINGING)
Robanukah may sound
as if it's Jewish

124
00:07:34,221 --> 00:07:37,932
But its
ancient-sounding customs
are exceptionally newish

125
00:07:38,141 --> 00:07:41,101
So take a hearty swallow
from your robo-Kiddush cup

126
00:07:41,186 --> 00:07:43,812
Which will give me time
to quickly make them up

127
00:07:44,189 --> 00:07:45,231
(BURPS)

128
00:07:45,315 --> 00:07:47,816
Do you spin
a dreidel made from clay?

129
00:07:48,568 --> 00:07:51,654
Mine is called a droid-el
and it's rigged
to make you pay

130
00:07:53,782 --> 00:07:56,450
Do you eat these yummy,
tin-wrapped
chocolate coins?

131
00:07:56,993 --> 00:08:00,079
Better. We got fem-bots
with illegal five-speed groins

132
00:08:00,163 --> 00:08:02,998
Shalom, Ruth and Esther.

133
00:08:03,500 --> 00:08:05,501
Why with the music
so loud?

134
00:08:05,585 --> 00:08:08,921
Would it kill him
to turn up the heat
a little in here?

135
00:08:09,506 --> 00:08:12,424
By far, the most
important thing is oil

136
00:08:12,676 --> 00:08:15,970
To keep the lamp light burning
or to help the latkes broil

137
00:08:16,054 --> 00:08:19,932
No, we pour the holy lubricant
out from this sacred vessel

138
00:08:20,016 --> 00:08:23,018
into this blessed
pit so they can wrestle

139
00:08:23,353 --> 00:08:26,730
The extra made-up touch
that makes Robanukah so special

140
00:08:26,815 --> 00:08:30,276
is the oil in which the
nasty fem-bots wrestle

141
00:08:30,443 --> 00:08:33,529
We shall now begin the
traditional oil wrestling.

142
00:08:33,613 --> 00:08:37,408
Will the referee bring out
the ceremonial cruse
of petroleum oil?

143
00:08:39,244 --> 00:08:41,120
Thank you, Abraham.

144
00:08:41,329 --> 00:08:44,373
Not in the hair, please.
I just had it did.

145
00:08:48,044 --> 00:08:49,211
Oh, no.

146
00:08:49,296 --> 00:08:51,880
These broads are
supposed to wrestle for
six and a half weeks,

147
00:08:51,965 --> 00:08:55,134
but there's only
enough petroleum oil
for four and a half weeks.

148
00:08:56,803 --> 00:08:58,178
We're still
getting paid, right?

149
00:08:58,263 --> 00:09:00,723
I told you it's an audition!

150
00:09:00,807 --> 00:09:04,184
Bender, four and a half weeks
of oil wrestling
sounds like plenty.

151
00:09:04,269 --> 00:09:07,021
This isn't
a lousy reform Robanukah.

152
00:09:07,105 --> 00:09:09,023
We need more petroleum oil!

153
00:09:14,070 --> 00:09:17,448
I got me some whale oil,
some squirrel oil.

154
00:09:17,532 --> 00:09:20,284
Not kosher!
It has to be petroleum oil!

155
00:09:20,368 --> 00:09:23,912
Do you not give a damn
about the hallowed
traditions of Robanukah?

156
00:09:23,997 --> 00:09:25,622
I reckon I do not.

157
00:09:25,749 --> 00:09:28,083
Anyways, Earth done run out
of petroleum oil.

158
00:09:28,251 --> 00:09:29,376
(ALL GASP)

159
00:09:29,627 --> 00:09:31,295
I tried to warn you.

160
00:09:31,379 --> 00:09:33,839
One unit of free,
limitless solar power, please.

161
00:09:39,095 --> 00:09:41,764
That'll be,
I don't know, 10 bucks.

162
00:09:42,599 --> 00:09:44,808
Can you make change
for a Nobel Prize?

163
00:09:45,226 --> 00:09:48,479
Man, can't we just make
more petroleum oil?

164
00:09:48,605 --> 00:09:50,356
I'm afraid not, son.

165
00:09:50,607 --> 00:09:52,983
Petroleum only forms
when organic matter

166
00:09:53,068 --> 00:09:58,072
is subjected to intense
pressure for hundreds
of millions of years.

167
00:09:58,281 --> 00:10:00,824
I can't wait that long.
I've got ADD.

168
00:10:00,909 --> 00:10:03,410
This is so unfair.

169
00:10:03,870 --> 00:10:06,955
I don't wrestle dry, Bender.
I went to Vassar.

170
00:10:07,082 --> 00:10:10,834
Professor, I want you
to look these poor
floozies in the eye

171
00:10:10,919 --> 00:10:13,629
and tell them their
oil-wrestling days are over.

172
00:10:22,013 --> 00:10:26,141
I suppose there could
be a minute quantity
of petroleum left,

173
00:10:26,267 --> 00:10:28,560
but it would be insanely
deep within the Earth

174
00:10:28,645 --> 00:10:30,729
at pressures so
dangerously high...

175
00:10:30,814 --> 00:10:32,064
(HORN HONKING)

176
00:10:32,148 --> 00:10:33,774
Let's go, already!

177
00:10:45,995 --> 00:10:48,205
Setting Bachman Turners
to Overdrive.

178
00:10:49,707 --> 00:10:53,085
We're getting pretty deep.
Look! Mole coffins.

179
00:11:04,931 --> 00:11:07,433
AMY: Oh, no.
We tunneled into a tunnel.

180
00:11:08,059 --> 00:11:11,478
What's that loud,
boring sound you'll hear
when I stop talking?

181
00:11:12,355 --> 00:11:15,858
FARNSWORTH: (GASPS)
It's an albino humping worm.

182
00:11:16,025 --> 00:11:17,484
Why do they call it that?

183
00:11:18,778 --> 00:11:21,196
Because it doesn't
have any pigment.

184
00:11:25,201 --> 00:11:26,785
What's our depth, Captain?

185
00:11:26,870 --> 00:11:28,871
Forty kilometers, 50.

186
00:11:28,955 --> 00:11:31,623
There must be petroleum oil
down here somewhere.

187
00:11:31,708 --> 00:11:33,292
Go deeper. Deeper!

188
00:11:33,376 --> 00:11:36,545
No, Bender.
The ship can't withstand
this much pressure.

189
00:11:36,629 --> 00:11:39,715
Sometimes it falls
apart just sitting
in the hangar.

190
00:11:39,799 --> 00:11:42,634
Professor,
I've never asked for
anything before,

191
00:11:42,969 --> 00:11:44,803
but seeing those
fem-bots glistening

192
00:11:44,888 --> 00:11:47,389
with oil means more
to me than life itself.

193
00:11:49,225 --> 00:11:53,395
Call me an old fool,
but I believe the Lord is
speaking through you.

194
00:11:53,521 --> 00:11:55,814
Brace yourselves, everyone.

195
00:11:59,152 --> 00:12:00,235
One hundred kilometers.

196
00:12:01,821 --> 00:12:02,821
Two hundred.

197
00:12:02,906 --> 00:12:04,323
I hate to complain
about the heat,

198
00:12:04,407 --> 00:12:06,742
but the air conditioner's
on fire.

199
00:12:08,661 --> 00:12:10,370
My ice cream Manwich!

200
00:12:16,753 --> 00:12:18,212
What the hell
are we doing?

201
00:12:18,296 --> 00:12:22,424
We're all gonna die
so this junkyard golem
can celebrate Robanukah.

202
00:12:23,134 --> 00:12:25,636
You vile racist.

203
00:12:25,720 --> 00:12:28,013
Haven't my people
suffered enough?

204
00:12:28,264 --> 00:12:32,017
Now keep drilling
for that petroleum oil,
you selfish cowards.

205
00:12:32,477 --> 00:12:35,354
Although, then again,
I guess any kind of oil
would be just as...

206
00:12:36,564 --> 00:12:37,564
Not my fault.

207
00:12:41,277 --> 00:12:43,820
(SINGING)
I am so great. Bender is great

208
00:12:43,988 --> 00:12:46,323
Bender, Bender, Bender

209
00:12:46,407 --> 00:12:48,033
Man, where'd the time go?

210
00:12:48,117 --> 00:12:50,786
Hey, you guys wanna...
Oh. Right.

211
00:12:51,663 --> 00:12:52,663
(GASPS)

212
00:12:53,581 --> 00:12:56,250
They turned
into petroleum oil.

213
00:12:57,001 --> 00:12:59,836
I thought they were selfish,
yet in the end,

214
00:12:59,921 --> 00:13:03,257
it turns out it was I
who thought they were selfish.

215
00:13:06,886 --> 00:13:09,638
(HUMMING)

216
00:13:10,139 --> 00:13:12,558
Hey, ladies, I found some.
What the...

217
00:13:12,642 --> 00:13:14,017
(BOTH GRUNTING)

218
00:13:14,686 --> 00:13:16,270
There was only
enough petroleum oil

219
00:13:16,354 --> 00:13:18,355
for four and a half
weeks of oil wrestling,

220
00:13:18,439 --> 00:13:21,149
but it lasted
500 million years.

221
00:13:21,484 --> 00:13:23,151
It's a miracle.

222
00:13:23,987 --> 00:13:26,154
Happy Robanukah, everyone.

223
00:13:26,239 --> 00:13:30,701
Coming up next,
more thoughtful,
interfaith hijinks.

224
00:13:34,289 --> 00:13:37,165
MAN: And now,
the unrelated conclusion.

225
00:13:42,505 --> 00:13:43,672
Hello, Fry.
Hey, Fry!

226
00:13:43,756 --> 00:13:44,881
How you doing?
What's up?

227
00:13:44,966 --> 00:13:47,718
LaBarbara, Hermes,
happy Kwanzaa.

228
00:13:47,802 --> 00:13:49,177
We brought a chocolate cake,

229
00:13:49,262 --> 00:13:51,847
but now I'm worried that
might be offensive
in some way.

230
00:13:51,931 --> 00:13:53,432
Just sit down.

231
00:13:54,475 --> 00:13:56,935
Happy Kwanzaa,
brother men and sister men.

232
00:13:57,020 --> 00:13:59,771
Well, look at the cat
the cat dragged in.

233
00:13:59,856 --> 00:14:02,566
Kwanzaa tradition
encourages educational gifts.

234
00:14:02,650 --> 00:14:05,193
So I brought Dwight
my book on mathketball.

235
00:14:05,653 --> 00:14:08,196
Whoa!
Let me see that.

236
00:14:09,741 --> 00:14:11,283
I'll sign it for you later.

237
00:14:11,367 --> 00:14:13,702
Man,
it's a cold one out there.

238
00:14:13,828 --> 00:14:15,120
Barbados Slim?

239
00:14:15,204 --> 00:14:16,788
Come in, Barbados.

240
00:14:16,873 --> 00:14:21,043
Look at yourself,
all throbbing and shirtless
for the holiday.

241
00:14:21,336 --> 00:14:22,919
I hope you're
ready to celebrate.

242
00:14:23,004 --> 00:14:26,256
All night long, woman.
(CHUCKLES)

243
00:14:27,634 --> 00:14:30,302
I'm glad you all could be
here with my family.

244
00:14:30,386 --> 00:14:35,057
Kwanzaa traditions
are quite ancient,
dating back over 1,000 years.

245
00:14:35,183 --> 00:14:36,475
Whoa!

246
00:14:36,559 --> 00:14:40,896
If only someone
could tell us more
about these traditions.

247
00:14:41,564 --> 00:14:43,482
Oh, yeah.

248
00:14:43,566 --> 00:14:44,983
Hey, Kool-Aid's here.

249
00:14:45,068 --> 00:14:47,944
No, child. That's not
a made-up character.

250
00:14:48,029 --> 00:14:49,237
It's Kwanzaa-bot.

251
00:14:49,322 --> 00:14:52,032
And I'm gonna tell you all
how we celebrate Kwanzaa.

252
00:14:52,116 --> 00:14:54,076
Zoidberg, lay down a beat.

253
00:14:54,160 --> 00:14:56,495
How about I just lay down?

254
00:14:56,746 --> 00:14:58,205
(TRIBAL MUSIC PLAYING)

255
00:15:00,083 --> 00:15:03,418
(SINGING)
There's seven basic principles
that go to make up Kwanzaa

256
00:15:03,503 --> 00:15:07,047
So sit your
asses down and have
some knowledge dropped upon ya

257
00:15:07,131 --> 00:15:08,757
Kujichagulia

258
00:15:08,841 --> 00:15:10,342
And Umoja.
And the rest!

259
00:15:10,426 --> 00:15:11,385
Now we get it

260
00:15:11,469 --> 00:15:13,762
Sit back down
There's gonna be a test

261
00:15:13,930 --> 00:15:15,597
My favorite's Ujamaa

262
00:15:15,682 --> 00:15:17,307
Cooperative economics

263
00:15:17,392 --> 00:15:19,768
Yo, bulldog, I'm talking here
Put away the comics

264
00:15:21,145 --> 00:15:24,189
Ku'umba is another one
It stands for creativity

265
00:15:24,273 --> 00:15:27,901
Like the ever-changing nature
of my sexual proclivities

266
00:15:28,111 --> 00:15:31,154
I think there's one called Nia
but I don't speak Swahili

267
00:15:31,531 --> 00:15:34,658
Something about a pine tree
and an oil-wrestling deal-y?

268
00:15:34,742 --> 00:15:38,286
That's from Xmas and Robanukah
you plagiarizing lout

269
00:15:38,371 --> 00:15:41,707
Yeah, I'm kind of
losing interest here
I best be rolling out

270
00:15:41,791 --> 00:15:45,127
But before I go,
the most important thing

271
00:15:45,503 --> 00:15:46,920
What's that, black Santa?

272
00:15:47,004 --> 00:15:50,424
You need seven Kwanzaa candles
that you light up every night

273
00:15:50,550 --> 00:15:52,175
But they best be
made of beeswax

274
00:15:52,301 --> 00:15:53,969
or you all might
as well be white

275
00:15:54,345 --> 00:15:58,473
They must be made of beeswax
or we might as well be white

276
00:15:59,475 --> 00:16:01,560
Well, we got
no beeswax candles,

277
00:16:01,644 --> 00:16:05,313
but these scented
regular wax candles
will do just fine.

278
00:16:05,440 --> 00:16:08,692
Girl, those stink sticks
are for single women
who take baths.

279
00:16:08,776 --> 00:16:11,528
If your Kwanzaa candles
ain't 100% beeswax,

280
00:16:11,654 --> 00:16:13,363
you bring shame
on your people.

281
00:16:13,448 --> 00:16:15,031
Well, now that won't do.

282
00:16:15,158 --> 00:16:16,992
Husband,
show a little Ku'umba

283
00:16:17,076 --> 00:16:19,536
and fetch some beeswax
before Kwanzaa ends.

284
00:16:19,620 --> 00:16:22,038
Sweet candelabra of
La Habra, LaBarbara.

285
00:16:22,123 --> 00:16:23,999
Isn't this the last night
of Kwanzaa?

286
00:16:24,083 --> 00:16:25,751
Who the hell knows?

287
00:16:27,462 --> 00:16:30,672
Finally, a bee farm that's
open late on Kwanzaa.

288
00:16:30,882 --> 00:16:32,924
Madam, I need beeswax.

289
00:16:33,009 --> 00:16:35,302
You sure you don't need
a little honey, handsome?

290
00:16:35,386 --> 00:16:38,638
Maybe a taste of sweet nectar
straight from the hive?

291
00:16:38,723 --> 00:16:39,848
(ALL EXCLAIM IN DISGUST)

292
00:16:39,932 --> 00:16:43,185
I just need some beeswax
to make Kwanzaa candles.

293
00:16:43,269 --> 00:16:44,770
Well, that's too darn bad.

294
00:16:44,854 --> 00:16:47,439
There ain't no beeswax
in the whole world.

295
00:16:47,523 --> 00:16:50,776
Oh, no. This could be
the year without a Kwanzaa,

296
00:16:50,860 --> 00:16:53,528
like every year before 1966.

297
00:16:53,613 --> 00:16:55,405
The bees are
acting all crazy

298
00:16:55,490 --> 00:16:58,158
like they been drinking
Tang and cough syrup,

299
00:16:58,242 --> 00:17:01,286
or as I call it,
my Friday night.
(LAUGHS)

300
00:17:01,370 --> 00:17:02,746
(COUGHING)

301
00:17:03,456 --> 00:17:04,623
My God.

302
00:17:04,874 --> 00:17:09,127
It's Colony Collapse Syndrome.
The bees are swarming
with parasites.

303
00:17:09,295 --> 00:17:10,420
They're all dying.

304
00:17:10,505 --> 00:17:12,422
Yeah,
but what a way to go.

305
00:17:12,507 --> 00:17:15,634
"Die young,
leave a pretty corpse,"
that's what I say.

306
00:17:15,718 --> 00:17:17,427
You should say
something else.

307
00:17:17,512 --> 00:17:19,888
Wait. I know where
we can get beeswax.

308
00:17:19,972 --> 00:17:22,057
From those giant space bees
who nearly killed us,

309
00:17:22,141 --> 00:17:23,975
and we swore we'd
never go back there.

310
00:17:24,060 --> 00:17:25,852
Let's go back there.

311
00:17:30,525 --> 00:17:32,025
To communicate
with the bees,

312
00:17:32,109 --> 00:17:34,736
we'll need to use
these trans-bumbleators.

313
00:17:34,821 --> 00:17:36,947
Bender,
say something in bee talk.

314
00:17:37,073 --> 00:17:39,574
(BUZZING)

315
00:17:40,076 --> 00:17:43,119
I'm sorry, Bender.
What do you want me
to put on the glass?

316
00:17:43,204 --> 00:17:44,246
(BUZZING)

317
00:17:44,497 --> 00:17:46,581
Okay, if we survive.

318
00:17:55,091 --> 00:17:57,968
Something's wrong.
It's way too quiet.

319
00:17:58,094 --> 00:17:59,928
Like the deadly Prius.

320
00:18:01,389 --> 00:18:03,223
FARNSWORTH: Ah,
here they come.

321
00:18:03,307 --> 00:18:05,559
They're in attack formation.
They're gonna kill us.

322
00:18:10,356 --> 00:18:11,648
That was weird.

323
00:18:11,732 --> 00:18:14,734
It's like the
Jägermeister air show
all over again.

324
00:18:19,615 --> 00:18:21,241
According to Google Hive,

325
00:18:21,325 --> 00:18:23,702
we are at the exact center
of the honeycomb.

326
00:18:24,412 --> 00:18:26,580
And there's a Jamba
Juice 0.2 miles
that way.

327
00:18:26,706 --> 00:18:28,957
Does that thing tell you
where the queen bee is?

328
00:18:29,041 --> 00:18:33,336
The big, fat, ugly,
compound-eyed,
hairy-thoraxed...

329
00:18:33,421 --> 00:18:35,672
Don't be applying
your Eurocentric

330
00:18:35,756 --> 00:18:37,966
standards of
beauty to me, fool.

331
00:18:40,261 --> 00:18:41,720
What's with the
kamikaz-bees?

332
00:18:41,804 --> 00:18:44,055
Man, my hive's
been going buck-wild

333
00:18:44,140 --> 00:18:47,642
since these blood-ganking
butt crabs moved in.

334
00:18:49,478 --> 00:18:51,271
Been there, done that.

335
00:18:51,355 --> 00:18:54,316
They're all infected,
just like the bees on Earth.

336
00:18:54,400 --> 00:18:57,819
Brother-sucking parasites gone
and disrupted our hive mind.

337
00:18:57,904 --> 00:18:59,738
Now, instead of
working in harmony,

338
00:18:59,822 --> 00:19:02,240
my bees just talk
smack to each other.

339
00:19:02,325 --> 00:19:04,451
Are you all black
with yellow stripes

340
00:19:04,577 --> 00:19:06,703
or are you yellow
with black stripes?

341
00:19:06,829 --> 00:19:09,456
Yellow with
black stripes, man.

342
00:19:09,874 --> 00:19:12,667
Why don't you just move along?

343
00:19:12,835 --> 00:19:15,086
Let me ask you something,
you sting my wife?

344
00:19:15,171 --> 00:19:16,755
What kind of
buzzing question is that?

345
00:19:16,839 --> 00:19:20,091
Where do you get
the wings big enough
to ask me that?

346
00:19:23,804 --> 00:19:27,599
Okay, gang.
We have plenty of beeswax.
Let's get back to the ship.

347
00:19:27,683 --> 00:19:29,809
No, we are not
going anywhere.

348
00:19:29,894 --> 00:19:32,479
I can't abide all
this bee-on-bee conflict.

349
00:19:32,563 --> 00:19:35,565
It's time to
African-Americanize
these honeybees.

350
00:19:37,234 --> 00:19:41,488
Listen up, bees.
It's Kwanzaa, a time of Umoja.

351
00:19:41,572 --> 00:19:43,198
It means "unity".

352
00:19:45,368 --> 00:19:48,078
You have to learn to
work together again.

353
00:19:48,162 --> 00:19:50,622
The crazy
tablecloth man is right.

354
00:19:50,706 --> 00:19:53,208
It's time to set
aside our differences.

355
00:19:54,043 --> 00:19:56,169
Black stripe, yellow stripe.

356
00:19:56,337 --> 00:20:00,131
At the end of the day,
we're just a couple
of darn talking space bees.

357
00:20:00,675 --> 00:20:02,342
Hey, forget about it.

358
00:20:02,426 --> 00:20:04,010
Come here
and give me a sting.

359
00:20:05,346 --> 00:20:09,307
Look. The spirit of Kwanzaa
is killing the parasites.

360
00:20:09,392 --> 00:20:10,433
(ALL CHEERING)

361
00:20:10,518 --> 00:20:11,518
FRY: Yuck!

362
00:20:11,602 --> 00:20:13,061
But, yay!

363
00:20:13,145 --> 00:20:14,896
Thank you, my human brother.

364
00:20:14,981 --> 00:20:18,066
Your message of unity
has touched our souls.

365
00:20:18,150 --> 00:20:22,028
We are once again of
a single hive mind.

366
00:20:26,242 --> 00:20:28,034
(CRASHING)
KWANZAA-BOT: Oh, yeah.

367
00:20:28,119 --> 00:20:29,619
Hurray! Kwanzaa-bot's
here to save...

368
00:20:29,704 --> 00:20:30,662
(SQUELCHING)

369
00:20:30,746 --> 00:20:32,288
They killed him.

370
00:20:37,586 --> 00:20:40,046
Joyous Kwanzaa, everybody.

371
00:20:46,095 --> 00:20:47,429
(AUDIENCE APPLAUDING)

372
00:20:47,513 --> 00:20:48,596
(CHUCKLING)

373
00:20:48,681 --> 00:20:52,058
Don't worry.
The Futurama crew
will be back next year

374
00:20:52,143 --> 00:20:56,479
with all new
episodes featuring Bender,
Leela and me, Al Gore,

375
00:20:56,564 --> 00:20:58,481
as Captain Lance Starman.

376
00:20:58,733 --> 00:21:02,068
And from all of us here
at Gunderson's Nuts,
happy holidays.

377
00:21:37,313 --> 00:21:38,313
ENGLISH - US - PSDH