1 00:00:04,225 --> 00:00:10,472 Sync and corrections by n17t01 www.addic7ed.com 2 00:00:27,089 --> 00:00:29,712 _ 3 00:00:43,701 --> 00:00:47,470 Planet Express Discount Prisoner Transfer at your service. 4 00:00:48,672 --> 00:00:51,106 Take a good look, Dr. Brutaloff. 5 00:00:51,141 --> 00:00:54,877 This prison is where you'll be spending your 300-year sentence. 6 00:00:54,911 --> 00:00:57,647 Yeah, until you're defrosted and wake up refreshed, 7 00:00:57,681 --> 00:00:59,949 unaware of any time having passed. 8 00:00:59,983 --> 00:01:02,885 He... he heard you! 9 00:01:02,919 --> 00:01:06,656 Oh, please. It's probably just the carbonite thawing slightly. 10 00:01:06,690 --> 00:01:07,990 Take him down to processing 11 00:01:08,024 --> 00:01:10,025 while I stay here and get hooted at. 12 00:01:13,163 --> 00:01:15,297 Ooh, yeah, baby! 13 00:01:15,332 --> 00:01:17,933 Oh, stop. 14 00:01:21,104 --> 00:01:23,539 Fry, look! 15 00:01:23,574 --> 00:01:26,909 That's Silicon Red, the universe's greatest folk singer! 16 00:01:26,943 --> 00:01:29,211 There's your wallet, your guitar, 17 00:01:29,246 --> 00:01:30,913 and your gun. 18 00:01:30,947 --> 00:01:32,081 You're free to go. 19 00:01:32,115 --> 00:01:34,751 Ah, still cocked. 20 00:01:34,785 --> 00:01:36,886 So, he's a folk singer. So what? 21 00:01:36,920 --> 00:01:38,888 So what? Have you forgotten 22 00:01:38,922 --> 00:01:40,857 my lifelong dream of being a folk singer... 23 00:01:40,891 --> 00:01:43,158 because I sure have until right now. 24 00:01:43,193 --> 00:01:44,494 Silicon Red! Silicon Red! 25 00:01:46,196 --> 00:01:48,097 Hey, I have a lifelong dream too. 26 00:01:48,131 --> 00:01:51,667 Of not being left alone with a frozen supervillain. 27 00:01:51,702 --> 00:01:53,936 Don't try anything, Dr. Brutaloff! 28 00:01:53,970 --> 00:01:55,104 I know karate. 29 00:01:56,239 --> 00:01:57,607 Aye-hyah! 30 00:01:59,877 --> 00:02:03,178 ♪ Then I shot him and stabbed him and stole all his gold ♪ 31 00:02:03,213 --> 00:02:08,551 ♪ And I tried on his face while his body turned cold ♪ 32 00:02:08,585 --> 00:02:09,952 Lovely. 33 00:02:09,986 --> 00:02:12,054 Just lovely. 34 00:02:12,088 --> 00:02:14,023 New topic. Can I have your autograph, 35 00:02:14,057 --> 00:02:16,358 and also you tell me everything you know about folk singing, 36 00:02:16,393 --> 00:02:18,227 and I'll take your guitar too? 37 00:02:18,261 --> 00:02:21,864 Old Salmonella? Son, I ought to kill you for asking. 38 00:02:21,899 --> 00:02:24,734 We met doing hard time on a Mississippi chain gang. 39 00:02:24,768 --> 00:02:27,236 And she'd been with me through 30-odd convictions. 40 00:02:27,270 --> 00:02:30,406 30? You must be quite a bungling lowlife. 41 00:02:30,441 --> 00:02:31,974 Anyhow, about the guitar. 42 00:02:33,644 --> 00:02:36,579 Aw, come on! I can't be a famous folk singer 43 00:02:36,613 --> 00:02:38,113 without a cool guitar. 44 00:02:38,148 --> 00:02:39,816 Can I at least get a photo? 45 00:02:39,850 --> 00:02:41,584 And before you answer that... 46 00:02:41,618 --> 00:02:43,619 Now I'll just have someone 47 00:02:43,654 --> 00:02:46,422 duplicate your guitar. Thanks, sucker. 48 00:02:46,457 --> 00:02:49,759 You're the sucker, sucker. See... 49 00:02:49,793 --> 00:02:52,995 with all Salmonella and me been through, her sound is unique. 50 00:02:53,029 --> 00:02:55,130 All your fancy technology will never be able 51 00:02:55,165 --> 00:02:56,999 to copy this guitar. 52 00:02:57,033 --> 00:02:59,001 Using my fancy technology, 53 00:02:59,035 --> 00:03:01,604 I can make an exact copy of this guitar. 54 00:03:01,638 --> 00:03:02,939 Tell me, Dr. Beeler. 55 00:03:02,973 --> 00:03:05,074 - Will I need to threaten you? - Not at all. 56 00:03:05,108 --> 00:03:07,844 You see, nowadays we can take a unique and beautiful object, 57 00:03:07,878 --> 00:03:11,146 and easily reduce it to a formula for mass production. 58 00:03:11,181 --> 00:03:13,683 I call the process "science." 59 00:03:13,717 --> 00:03:15,518 I'll just need to locate 60 00:03:15,552 --> 00:03:17,520 that guitar image on your file system. 61 00:03:25,629 --> 00:03:27,630 Whoa, that's a lot of porn. 62 00:03:27,664 --> 00:03:29,298 Where'd you store the guitar picture? 63 00:03:29,332 --> 00:03:30,466 I don't know. 64 00:03:30,501 --> 00:03:32,702 I mainly hang out in here. 65 00:03:36,473 --> 00:03:38,875 Ah-ha, your folk singing folder. 66 00:03:38,909 --> 00:03:41,176 I'll just double-kick on that. 67 00:03:42,245 --> 00:03:44,046 Got it. 68 00:03:44,080 --> 00:03:47,817 Now I'll convert that guitar image to a wire-frame model. 69 00:03:47,851 --> 00:03:49,485 There, like so. 70 00:03:49,520 --> 00:03:52,121 And send it wirelessly to my 3D printer. 71 00:04:03,734 --> 00:04:05,902 By laying down layer after layer of nano-plastic, 72 00:04:05,936 --> 00:04:09,371 it can turn your wildest dreams 73 00:04:09,406 --> 00:04:10,706 into ordinary reality. 74 00:04:10,741 --> 00:04:12,975 Witchcraft! Sorcerer! 75 00:04:13,010 --> 00:04:14,043 Neat. 76 00:04:14,077 --> 00:04:16,412 So, how long will it take? 77 00:04:16,446 --> 00:04:18,014 Four or five hours. 78 00:04:18,048 --> 00:04:20,750 Shall we adjourn to the porn folder? 79 00:04:27,123 --> 00:04:30,927 I call my new guitar Bender Mae because Bender may be 80 00:04:30,961 --> 00:04:33,262 the greatest folk singer of all time! 81 00:04:33,296 --> 00:04:34,830 It looks pretty authentic. 82 00:04:34,865 --> 00:04:36,398 You bet it's authentic. See this scratch? 83 00:04:36,433 --> 00:04:39,201 I tell people she got it while I was doing hard time 84 00:04:39,235 --> 00:04:40,870 with a New Hampshire chain gang. 85 00:04:40,904 --> 00:04:42,572 I have a scratch too. 86 00:04:42,606 --> 00:04:45,174 From where Dr. Brutaloff slashed me with his finger knives, 87 00:04:45,208 --> 00:04:47,443 right after he thawed out of his carbonite, 88 00:04:47,477 --> 00:04:49,679 and right before he froze me in his carbonite 89 00:04:49,713 --> 00:04:54,183 because you deserted me. 90 00:04:56,286 --> 00:04:58,520 Eh, you're always getting frozen in stuff. 91 00:04:58,555 --> 00:05:00,456 It's your thing, man. 92 00:05:00,490 --> 00:05:03,392 Bender, you're not a folk singer just 'cause you have a guitar. 93 00:05:03,426 --> 00:05:05,394 And a flannel shirt. 94 00:05:05,428 --> 00:05:08,030 I claim I won it in a knife fight at J. Crew. 95 00:05:08,065 --> 00:05:10,432 It must be interesting to win a knife fight. 96 00:05:10,467 --> 00:05:12,201 I wouldn't know. 97 00:05:12,235 --> 00:05:15,738 The point is... do you even know any actual folk songs? 98 00:05:15,772 --> 00:05:18,608 Actual folk songs are all public domain. 99 00:05:18,642 --> 00:05:19,875 Where's the money in that? 100 00:05:19,910 --> 00:05:21,376 I'll just make up my own. 101 00:05:21,411 --> 00:05:23,813 But, robot, you can't just make up folk songs 102 00:05:23,847 --> 00:05:25,948 like you can a medical diploma. 103 00:05:25,983 --> 00:05:27,783 They have to come from the heart. 104 00:05:27,818 --> 00:05:29,619 Wrong again, Zoidberg. 105 00:05:29,653 --> 00:05:32,387 While you were yakking, I downloaded every folk song 106 00:05:32,422 --> 00:05:34,223 in the universe and analyzed them. 107 00:05:34,257 --> 00:05:35,958 They're only a few basic patterns. 108 00:05:35,993 --> 00:05:37,960 For example... 109 00:05:37,995 --> 00:05:40,896 36% of all folk-song heroes work on a railroad 110 00:05:40,931 --> 00:05:42,999 and are named "Big" something. 111 00:05:43,033 --> 00:05:45,635 Next slide, please. 112 00:05:45,669 --> 00:05:48,470 75% of these big railroad men have bad-hearted women 113 00:05:48,505 --> 00:05:50,405 who done them wrong, 114 00:05:50,440 --> 00:05:53,408 usually with a smooth-talking rambler. 115 00:05:53,443 --> 00:05:54,944 There's a lot more, but in the end, 116 00:05:54,978 --> 00:05:57,412 somebody kills somebody, blah, blah, blah. 117 00:05:57,447 --> 00:06:00,650 ♪ Somebody kills somebody, blah, blah, blah ♪ 118 00:06:00,684 --> 00:06:02,184 Catchy. 119 00:06:02,218 --> 00:06:03,619 Not what I meant, but don't perform it 120 00:06:03,654 --> 00:06:05,655 without my permission! Anyway... 121 00:06:05,689 --> 00:06:07,823 using this simple formula, I can generate 122 00:06:07,858 --> 00:06:09,792 as many hit folk songs as I want. 123 00:06:09,826 --> 00:06:11,426 All I need is an audience. 124 00:06:11,461 --> 00:06:14,530 And that's where Silicon Red comes in. 125 00:06:20,804 --> 00:06:24,106 Man, all this corncob pipe smoke 126 00:06:24,141 --> 00:06:26,208 is irritating my stab wounds. 127 00:06:26,242 --> 00:06:27,476 Ladies and gentlemen, 128 00:06:27,510 --> 00:06:29,344 I'm proud to present, 129 00:06:29,379 --> 00:06:32,882 fresh from another down-home authentic prison term, 130 00:06:32,916 --> 00:06:35,851 the universe's greatest folk singer, 131 00:06:35,886 --> 00:06:39,889 Silicon Red! 132 00:06:39,923 --> 00:06:41,123 Thank you. 133 00:06:43,727 --> 00:06:45,995 Silicon Red, everyone. 134 00:06:49,766 --> 00:06:53,803 I'm Ramblin' Rodriguez, the new greatest folk singer ever. 135 00:06:53,837 --> 00:06:55,738 And I'm gonna sing my new masterpiece, 136 00:06:55,772 --> 00:06:59,508 "The Ballad of Me, Ramblin' Rodriguez." 137 00:06:59,542 --> 00:07:01,310 ♪ Well... ♪ 138 00:07:01,344 --> 00:07:04,213 ♪ My bad-hearted woman loved a smooth-talking gambler ♪ 139 00:07:04,247 --> 00:07:06,716 ♪ So I ran him over with my train ♪ 140 00:07:06,750 --> 00:07:08,483 ♪ Lord, Lord, yes, I ♪ 141 00:07:08,518 --> 00:07:13,222 ♪ Ran him over with my train! ♪ 142 00:07:13,256 --> 00:07:17,193 That name again is Ramblin' Rodriguez. 143 00:07:22,232 --> 00:07:24,366 Why are they booing me, Silicon? 144 00:07:24,400 --> 00:07:25,935 'Cause your song was insincere, boy. 145 00:07:25,969 --> 00:07:28,270 Now, get out and don't come back 146 00:07:28,304 --> 00:07:30,372 till you've lived a life worth singing about. 147 00:07:30,406 --> 00:07:32,541 Yes, sir. 148 00:07:35,948 --> 00:07:38,550 _ 149 00:07:41,384 --> 00:07:44,854 And don't go to prison. That's my shtick! 150 00:07:48,672 --> 00:07:51,474 I failed at my lifelong dream again. 151 00:07:51,508 --> 00:07:54,044 How can I be so bad at everything I try 152 00:07:54,078 --> 00:07:55,979 and still be so great? 153 00:07:56,013 --> 00:07:57,647 Bender, you have a lovely baritone, 154 00:07:57,681 --> 00:08:01,484 and you sure can strum that plastic guitar, 155 00:08:01,518 --> 00:08:03,053 but you can't write a real folk song 156 00:08:03,087 --> 00:08:05,322 about experiences you haven't had. 157 00:08:05,356 --> 00:08:08,058 Yeah, you should write a song about a heartless robot 158 00:08:08,092 --> 00:08:09,859 who leaves his best friend to be murdered. 159 00:08:09,893 --> 00:08:12,929 Look, Leela, I'd love to write about my own experiences... 160 00:08:12,964 --> 00:08:14,597 The heartless robot is Bender. 161 00:08:14,631 --> 00:08:15,832 The best friend is me. 162 00:08:15,866 --> 00:08:18,101 How can you people be so blind? 163 00:08:18,135 --> 00:08:21,438 But I've never picked cotton or been on top of Old Smokey 164 00:08:21,472 --> 00:08:23,840 or worked on anything all the livelong day, 165 00:08:23,874 --> 00:08:25,342 let alone a railroad. 166 00:08:25,376 --> 00:08:27,577 Then go live among the railroad men, why not? 167 00:08:27,611 --> 00:08:29,512 You'll come to understand them, 168 00:08:29,546 --> 00:08:32,282 just as I now understand the ape-men of Earth. 169 00:08:32,316 --> 00:08:34,584 As stupid as Zoidberg's idea is... 170 00:08:34,618 --> 00:08:36,386 it's brilliant when I have it. 171 00:08:36,420 --> 00:08:39,356 I'm off to the railroad to become a folk singer. 172 00:08:57,574 --> 00:09:01,777 Uh, I'm looking for the wrong side of the tracks. 173 00:09:01,812 --> 00:09:04,580 Then you've come to the right side of the tracks. 174 00:09:04,615 --> 00:09:06,216 Have a seat, stranger. 175 00:09:06,250 --> 00:09:07,884 My name's Bender Rodriguez 176 00:09:07,918 --> 00:09:10,387 and I want to learn the railroading business. 177 00:09:10,421 --> 00:09:11,954 Big Caboose. I'm a steel-driving man 178 00:09:11,989 --> 00:09:15,458 working the trans-universal line. 179 00:09:15,493 --> 00:09:17,793 Wow, you've had the exact experiences 180 00:09:17,828 --> 00:09:19,562 I want to steal for my song. 181 00:09:19,596 --> 00:09:21,431 Aw, heck, I'm nothing special. 182 00:09:21,465 --> 00:09:24,634 Just a down-home robot with a big old hammer. 183 00:09:24,668 --> 00:09:26,569 Hammer, that should be easy to rhyme. 184 00:09:26,603 --> 00:09:29,272 - You done time in the slammer? - Uh, nope. 185 00:09:29,306 --> 00:09:31,241 - Been to Alabama? - Sorry. 186 00:09:31,275 --> 00:09:32,275 How's your grammar? 187 00:09:32,309 --> 00:09:33,676 Praiseworthy. 188 00:09:41,518 --> 00:09:42,718 _ 189 00:09:42,719 --> 00:09:45,321 Bender, meet Fast Frank Brogan. 190 00:09:45,356 --> 00:09:48,791 Daredevil engineer dies in the crash of Old '88. 191 00:09:48,825 --> 00:09:50,293 Dandy Jim and Gus. 192 00:09:50,327 --> 00:09:52,762 Gentlemen hobos with a story to tell. 193 00:09:52,796 --> 00:09:55,265 I was got drunk and ate my big toe. 194 00:09:55,299 --> 00:09:56,599 Can't say I miss it. 195 00:09:56,633 --> 00:09:58,134 And good old Cookie, 196 00:09:58,169 --> 00:10:01,337 the crusty comically inept geological surveyor. 197 00:10:01,372 --> 00:10:05,442 Jiggers! I dropped my sexton in the stew. 198 00:10:05,476 --> 00:10:07,610 ♪ Been up north ♪ 199 00:10:09,012 --> 00:10:11,314 ♪ Been down south ♪ 200 00:10:11,348 --> 00:10:13,483 ♪ Got a real weak back ♪ 201 00:10:13,517 --> 00:10:15,851 ♪ I got a real big mouth ♪ 202 00:10:21,258 --> 00:10:23,960 So while Bender goofs off at some railroad camp, 203 00:10:23,994 --> 00:10:27,163 I have to deliver dynamite to a railroad camp myself. 204 00:10:27,198 --> 00:10:29,199 And it's the same railroad camp. 205 00:10:29,233 --> 00:10:32,469 I mean, the irony is palpable. 206 00:10:32,503 --> 00:10:33,903 Oops. 207 00:10:33,937 --> 00:10:35,371 Whoopsie. 208 00:10:35,406 --> 00:10:36,772 My bad. 209 00:10:40,444 --> 00:10:42,212 Dibs on the toes. 210 00:10:42,246 --> 00:10:45,815 So how's it going with the real-world experience? 211 00:10:45,849 --> 00:10:48,084 Have you found a railroad man to write a song about? 212 00:10:48,119 --> 00:10:49,385 Yep, my good friend 213 00:10:49,420 --> 00:10:50,553 Big Something here. 214 00:10:50,588 --> 00:10:52,088 Uh, Caboose. 215 00:10:52,123 --> 00:10:53,556 I'm a steel-driving man, 216 00:10:53,591 --> 00:10:55,825 and there ain't much more to say about me. 217 00:10:55,859 --> 00:10:57,360 Not till now there wasn't. 218 00:10:57,394 --> 00:11:01,998 ♪ Well, Big Caboose was a steel-drivin' son of a gun ♪ 219 00:11:02,032 --> 00:11:04,900 ♪ Till a bad-hearted woman he spied... ♪ 220 00:11:04,935 --> 00:11:06,236 But, Bender, 221 00:11:06,270 --> 00:11:08,904 I never spied no bad-hearted woman. 222 00:11:08,939 --> 00:11:10,440 In my song you did-- 223 00:11:10,474 --> 00:11:13,443 a temptress named-- I don't know-- Jezebel. 224 00:11:13,477 --> 00:11:15,911 Wow, creativity's hard work. 225 00:11:17,814 --> 00:11:19,449 Ah. 226 00:11:19,483 --> 00:11:21,117 You know my favorite part of your song? 227 00:11:21,152 --> 00:11:23,886 The part where it ended. 228 00:11:23,920 --> 00:11:26,722 Then, settle in, 'cause that's about a half hour from now. 229 00:11:26,757 --> 00:11:30,760 ♪ Well, Jezebel's heart did wander ♪ 230 00:11:30,794 --> 00:11:34,297 ♪ When she saw that ramblin' man ♪ 231 00:11:34,331 --> 00:11:37,700 ♪ He was tall and dark and shiny ♪ 232 00:11:37,734 --> 00:11:40,703 ♪ And a native Mexican. ♪ 233 00:11:40,737 --> 00:11:43,706 That sleazy rambler sounds an awful lot like you, Bender. 234 00:11:43,740 --> 00:11:45,441 Hey, thanks for noticing. 235 00:11:45,476 --> 00:11:48,278 Just for that, I'm gonna slip you into the 57th verse. 236 00:11:48,312 --> 00:11:51,281 You can be my best friend who abandons me when I need you. 237 00:11:51,315 --> 00:11:53,749 Now, that's a verse we can all enjoy. 238 00:11:53,784 --> 00:11:55,652 ♪ Well, Rodriguez ran ♪ 239 00:11:55,686 --> 00:11:57,654 ♪ To his best friend ♪ 240 00:11:57,688 --> 00:12:00,890 ♪ Said, "Help me or I'll surely be killed" ♪ 241 00:12:00,924 --> 00:12:04,394 ♪ Fry laughed and he said, "You deserted me once ♪ 242 00:12:04,428 --> 00:12:07,597 ♪ "Now it's your turn to feel the chill, Lord, Lord ♪ 243 00:12:07,631 --> 00:12:11,801 ♪ Now it's your turn to feel the chill." ♪ 244 00:12:11,835 --> 00:12:16,406 You've accurately portrayed the nature of my grievance. 245 00:12:20,777 --> 00:12:24,780 ♪ Big Caboose went lookin' for Rodriguez ♪ 246 00:12:24,815 --> 00:12:26,782 ♪ Straight to New New York town ♪ 247 00:12:26,817 --> 00:12:28,651 ♪ He cried... ♪ 248 00:12:28,686 --> 00:12:30,320 Bender, guess what. 249 00:12:30,354 --> 00:12:33,690 I met a fabulous girl and we're engaged to be hitched. 250 00:12:33,724 --> 00:12:34,990 That's great, Caboose. 251 00:12:35,025 --> 00:12:36,459 Come on in and set a spell. 252 00:12:36,493 --> 00:12:37,594 Aw, no time. 253 00:12:37,628 --> 00:12:39,262 I got someplace to be. 254 00:12:39,296 --> 00:12:40,863 See you soon, honeybunch. 255 00:12:40,897 --> 00:12:42,131 Okay, dumpling. 256 00:12:43,300 --> 00:12:46,102 My man's gone, gone. 257 00:12:46,136 --> 00:12:49,606 Oh, I'm so lonely and easy. 258 00:12:49,640 --> 00:12:51,608 Oh. 259 00:12:54,745 --> 00:12:55,978 Whoo-whoo. 260 00:13:01,218 --> 00:13:02,985 Oh, yeah. 261 00:13:03,019 --> 00:13:05,521 This is definitely going in the song. 262 00:13:05,556 --> 00:13:09,191 ♪ He cried, "Rambler, you slept with my Jezebel." ♪ 263 00:13:09,226 --> 00:13:11,327 Hey, what's your name, anyhow? 264 00:13:11,362 --> 00:13:12,328 Jezebel. 265 00:13:12,363 --> 00:13:13,329 Oh, good, I won't have 266 00:13:13,364 --> 00:13:14,797 to change any words. 267 00:13:22,839 --> 00:13:25,074 Yeah, you're right. It's getting late. 268 00:13:25,108 --> 00:13:26,509 I'll get your coat. 269 00:13:27,678 --> 00:13:29,979 Oh, hey, Big Caboose. 270 00:13:30,013 --> 00:13:31,547 What are you doing here on Earth? 271 00:13:31,582 --> 00:13:34,884 I'm here for to see Ramblin' Rodriguez. 272 00:13:34,918 --> 00:13:35,985 Well, he's at the railroad camp. 273 00:13:36,019 --> 00:13:37,654 I know, 274 00:13:37,688 --> 00:13:41,658 but some strange force drew me to New New York town. 275 00:13:41,692 --> 00:13:44,994 ♪ That rambler slept with my Jezebel ♪ 276 00:13:45,028 --> 00:13:48,831 ♪ Now I'm comin' for to shoot him down, Lord, Lord ♪ 277 00:13:48,865 --> 00:13:53,068 ♪ Comin' for to shoot him down. ♪ 278 00:13:53,103 --> 00:13:57,239 Guess I'll go back to the railroad camp now. 279 00:13:57,274 --> 00:14:00,943 That's weird, he sounded a lot like Bender's folk song. 280 00:14:00,977 --> 00:14:02,878 Not a lot like Bender's folk song-- 281 00:14:02,913 --> 00:14:05,448 exactly like et cetera, et cetera. 282 00:14:05,482 --> 00:14:07,417 His song is coming true somehow. 283 00:14:07,451 --> 00:14:11,554 Oh, my God, reality is infringing Bender's copyright. 284 00:14:13,290 --> 00:14:15,124 ♪ "I'm comin' for to shoot you down." ♪ 285 00:14:15,158 --> 00:14:16,759 No, wait. 286 00:14:16,794 --> 00:14:19,729 ♪ "I'm comin' for to run you down." ♪ 287 00:14:19,763 --> 00:14:20,896 With a train. 288 00:14:20,931 --> 00:14:21,897 Get it? 289 00:14:39,483 --> 00:14:42,585 It's over, Jezebel. Grab your things and get out. 290 00:14:42,619 --> 00:14:44,119 I didn't bring any things. 291 00:14:44,154 --> 00:14:46,456 That's what I like best about you, baby. 292 00:14:53,096 --> 00:14:55,931 Rambler, you slept with my Jezebel, 293 00:14:55,966 --> 00:14:58,133 and I'm comin' for to run you down, Lord, Lord. 294 00:14:58,168 --> 00:14:59,602 ♪ I'm comin' for ♪ 295 00:14:59,636 --> 00:15:04,273 ♪ To run you down. ♪ 296 00:15:41,858 --> 00:15:45,127 Fry, help, let me in. 297 00:15:46,228 --> 00:15:47,462 Bender? 298 00:15:47,496 --> 00:15:49,497 What are you doing? It's 3:00 a.m. 299 00:15:49,532 --> 00:15:51,166 I don't care if it's three B.M. 300 00:15:51,200 --> 00:15:52,267 Open up and hide me! 301 00:15:52,301 --> 00:15:54,269 I don't think so, Bender. 302 00:15:54,303 --> 00:15:55,671 You deserted me once, 303 00:15:55,705 --> 00:15:59,007 and now it's your turn to "feel the chill." 304 00:15:59,042 --> 00:16:00,441 Ha! 305 00:16:10,019 --> 00:16:11,653 Breaker, breaker. 306 00:16:11,688 --> 00:16:12,788 Hola. 307 00:16:14,223 --> 00:16:15,857 Professor, help. 308 00:16:15,892 --> 00:16:18,160 The hero of my folk song tried to run me down, 309 00:16:18,194 --> 00:16:20,328 and Fry refused to save me. 310 00:16:20,362 --> 00:16:22,864 - That doesn't sound like me. - Fry? 311 00:16:22,899 --> 00:16:25,400 But you just-- eh, I'll figure it out later. 312 00:16:25,434 --> 00:16:28,203 But first I'll kill you! 313 00:16:28,237 --> 00:16:30,138 Bender, stop. 314 00:16:30,173 --> 00:16:32,140 We've been trying to warn you all night. 315 00:16:32,175 --> 00:16:34,475 You didn't answer your cell phone telephone, 316 00:16:34,510 --> 00:16:36,477 so the Professor tried his CB. 317 00:16:36,512 --> 00:16:38,513 Uh, scratch that, Rubber Turkey. 318 00:16:38,547 --> 00:16:40,716 We got a 20 on the tin man. 319 00:16:40,750 --> 00:16:42,884 Toodle-oo. 320 00:16:42,919 --> 00:16:46,254 But Fry betrayed me at our apartment! 321 00:16:46,288 --> 00:16:47,823 Just like in your folk song. 322 00:16:47,857 --> 00:16:49,825 Somehow everything you sang about 323 00:16:49,859 --> 00:16:51,827 is happening in real life. 324 00:16:51,861 --> 00:16:53,328 Whoa, whoa, whoa. 325 00:16:53,362 --> 00:16:55,197 Are you saying that guy at the apartment 326 00:16:55,231 --> 00:16:57,432 was some kind of exact copy of Fry? 327 00:16:57,466 --> 00:16:58,867 'Cause that's crazy. 328 00:16:58,901 --> 00:17:00,902 He's a unique and beautiful object. 329 00:17:01,938 --> 00:17:03,304 The printer. 330 00:17:05,608 --> 00:17:08,343 Oh, I must have left the wireless connection 331 00:17:08,377 --> 00:17:10,612 to your folk song directory open. 332 00:17:10,646 --> 00:17:12,280 Everything you wrote in the song got routed 333 00:17:12,314 --> 00:17:14,282 straight to the 3-D printer. 334 00:17:14,316 --> 00:17:17,085 Big Caboose, duplicate Fry, even Cookie 335 00:17:17,120 --> 00:17:19,921 the crusty, comically inept geological surveyor-- 336 00:17:19,956 --> 00:17:21,890 they're all made of nano-plastic. 337 00:17:21,924 --> 00:17:24,192 So, if Bender had sung about, I don't know, 338 00:17:24,227 --> 00:17:26,294 some crazy giant land octopus attacking me, 339 00:17:26,328 --> 00:17:28,529 it would have actually happened? 340 00:17:28,564 --> 00:17:32,300 I can't even imagine singing about such a thing. 341 00:17:32,334 --> 00:17:34,236 ♪ Well... ♪ 342 00:17:34,270 --> 00:17:36,071 Fry, run. 343 00:17:36,105 --> 00:17:38,874 Aw, relax, Beeler's stupid machine takes hours 344 00:17:38,908 --> 00:17:39,875 to print anything. 345 00:17:39,909 --> 00:17:41,376 No, it doesn't. 346 00:17:41,410 --> 00:17:44,112 I improved it using fancy modern technology. 347 00:17:52,588 --> 00:17:55,056 Bender, whatever you do, 348 00:17:55,091 --> 00:17:58,726 don't think about any more octopuses. 349 00:17:58,761 --> 00:18:00,328 Octopuses? 350 00:18:00,362 --> 00:18:04,499 I believe the correct plural is octopi. 351 00:18:06,869 --> 00:18:10,972 I'm sorry. "Octopuses" is also acceptable. 352 00:18:11,007 --> 00:18:13,241 Think about puppies, Bender, 353 00:18:13,276 --> 00:18:15,076 cute, harmless, dead puppies. 354 00:18:15,111 --> 00:18:17,913 Don't worry. I'll disconnect him from the printer. 355 00:18:17,947 --> 00:18:20,982 No, wait, I know how to save Bender from Big Caboose. 356 00:18:23,186 --> 00:18:25,586 All he has to do is write his way out of this mess, 357 00:18:25,621 --> 00:18:28,290 and the 3-D printer will make it happen. 358 00:18:28,324 --> 00:18:29,291 Like how? 359 00:18:29,325 --> 00:18:30,658 Well, I don't know. 360 00:18:30,693 --> 00:18:33,661 Make up another giant octopus and have it kill Big Caboose. 361 00:18:33,696 --> 00:18:35,263 What kind of lazy ending is that? 362 00:18:35,298 --> 00:18:37,498 I'm not gonna put that in my song. 363 00:18:37,533 --> 00:18:38,533 Hey, I have a cool idea. 364 00:18:38,567 --> 00:18:40,435 Create a duplicate Bender, 365 00:18:40,469 --> 00:18:44,005 so when Big Caboose kills it, it's not real, it's duplicate. 366 00:18:44,040 --> 00:18:46,641 Ooh, ooh, they did that on Star Trek, TNG. 367 00:18:46,675 --> 00:18:48,109 Cram it, nerd. 368 00:18:48,144 --> 00:18:49,144 I'm not going to just copy 369 00:18:49,178 --> 00:18:51,279 some feel-good TV show wrap-up. 370 00:18:52,982 --> 00:18:55,050 I can think of a hundred endings that'll save you. 371 00:18:55,084 --> 00:18:56,351 Just pick one. 372 00:18:56,385 --> 00:18:59,620 No, Dr. Beeler, I won't just pick one. 373 00:18:59,655 --> 00:19:03,524 My audience deserves better than some crappy, formulaic ending. 374 00:19:03,559 --> 00:19:05,026 If I must die, 375 00:19:05,061 --> 00:19:08,730 let me die in a blaze of artistic integrity. 376 00:19:09,866 --> 00:19:11,766 ♪ Well... ♪ 377 00:19:16,205 --> 00:19:19,640 _ 378 00:19:19,675 --> 00:19:22,844 ♪ Then the steel-drivin' man ♪ 379 00:19:22,879 --> 00:19:25,513 ♪ Rammed his train through the wall ♪ 380 00:19:25,547 --> 00:19:29,684 ♪ And crushed him flatter than a MacBook Air, Lord, Lord ♪ 381 00:19:29,718 --> 00:19:34,655 ♪ Crushed him flatter than a MacBook Air. ♪ 382 00:19:34,690 --> 00:19:36,858 ♪ But while you were all out fighting ♪ 383 00:19:36,893 --> 00:19:38,559 ♪ With the giant plastic octopi ♪ 384 00:19:38,594 --> 00:19:40,896 ♪ I copied myself, you see... ♪ 385 00:19:40,930 --> 00:19:42,197 - Bender! - Bender! 386 00:19:42,231 --> 00:19:43,598 ♪ And I cowered in the bathroom ♪ 387 00:19:43,632 --> 00:19:45,400 ♪ While that steel-drivin' moron ♪ 388 00:19:45,434 --> 00:19:48,236 ♪ Killed a duplicate instead of me ♪ 389 00:19:48,271 --> 00:19:50,071 - ♪ Lord, lord ♪ - ♪ Killed a duplicate ♪ 390 00:19:50,106 --> 00:19:53,674 ♪ Instead of me. ♪ 391 00:19:56,312 --> 00:19:58,413 Now, that's what I call a great ending. 392 00:19:58,447 --> 00:20:02,250 I made a copy of myself and Big Caboose killed him. 393 00:20:02,285 --> 00:20:03,751 But you said making a copy of yourself 394 00:20:03,786 --> 00:20:05,686 would be a lousy ending. 395 00:20:05,721 --> 00:20:08,523 No, duplicate me said that. 396 00:20:08,557 --> 00:20:09,891 See, I had to be sure he wouldn't try 397 00:20:09,926 --> 00:20:11,259 and weasel out of getting killed 398 00:20:11,294 --> 00:20:13,094 like I would and did, 399 00:20:13,129 --> 00:20:16,398 so I created him with a tragic weakness, artistic integrity. 400 00:20:16,432 --> 00:20:17,865 Of course. 401 00:20:17,900 --> 00:20:19,734 How could we have thought a guy with integrity 402 00:20:19,768 --> 00:20:21,702 was you even for a second? 403 00:20:21,737 --> 00:20:23,738 Because you're idiots. 404 00:20:23,772 --> 00:20:26,574 Come on, Silicon Red, let's sell out. 405 00:20:33,749 --> 00:20:35,817 ♪ I'm the real Rodriguez, will you please stand up? ♪ 406 00:20:35,851 --> 00:20:37,085 ♪ He been workin' on the railroad ♪ 407 00:20:37,119 --> 00:20:38,653 ♪ Ladies can't get enough ♪ 408 00:20:38,687 --> 00:20:41,389 ♪ I made a 3-D version of my worst nightmare ♪ 409 00:20:41,424 --> 00:20:43,791 ♪ Sucker tried to stop the printer, and I found him there ♪ 410 00:20:43,826 --> 00:20:46,394 ♪ Went 187 on his robot ass ♪ 411 00:20:46,429 --> 00:20:48,896 ♪ Turned out to be a copy of my robot ass ♪ 412 00:20:48,931 --> 00:20:51,333 ♪ Now we're folk-singin' players packin' Beaujolais ♪ 413 00:20:51,367 --> 00:20:54,436 ♪ And makin' max contributions to our 401K. ♪ 414 00:20:54,470 --> 00:20:55,736 Peace out. 415 00:21:01,673 --> 00:21:03,640 Sync and corrections by n17t01 www.addic7ed.com