1
00:00:00,940 --> 00:00:04,032
<i># I wish I had a river #</i>

2
00:00:04,095 --> 00:00:08,697
<i># I could skate away on #</i>

3
00:00:09,291 --> 00:00:10,391
Hey, Jess.

4
00:00:10,459 --> 00:00:11,726
I brought you some tea.

5
00:00:11,794 --> 00:00:13,995
Just gonna leave it
right here, okay?

6
00:00:14,063 --> 00:00:15,197
There you go.

7
00:00:15,264 --> 00:00:16,965
So, Russell...

8
00:00:17,533 --> 00:00:18,677
Ouch.

9
00:00:18,716 --> 00:00:20,346
Right? I mean, who
saw that coming?

10
00:00:20,408 --> 00:00:21,681
Not me.

11
00:00:21,785 --> 00:00:23,775
Certainly not Russell.

12
00:00:23,839 --> 00:00:25,572
I guess, I guess
you saw it coming.

13
00:00:25,640 --> 00:00:27,341
I mean, 'cause you're
the one who broke up with him.

14
00:00:27,408 --> 00:00:28,846
- Leave, Schmidt.
- All right, fine.

15
00:00:28,891 --> 00:00:30,234
I'll leave. But
you know what?

16
00:00:30,496 --> 00:00:32,637
you're not the
only one that's hurting here,

17
00:00:32,679 --> 00:00:34,371
Jessica Day.
The economy stinks,

18
00:00:34,415 --> 00:00:37,483
bees are dying, movies are
pretty much all sequels now,

19
00:00:37,514 --> 00:00:40,403
- and I... have a broken penis.
- Don't say "broken penis."

20
00:00:40,519 --> 00:00:43,061
Don't pretend to know my pain.

21
00:00:45,625 --> 00:00:46,893
Hey, Jess.

22
00:00:46,961 --> 00:00:48,995
- Hi.
- What's this song called?

23
00:00:49,063 --> 00:00:50,563
- "The River."
- Hmm.

24
00:00:50,630 --> 00:00:52,232
- Do you like it?
- Yeah, yeah, I liked the way

25
00:00:52,299 --> 00:00:54,499
you played it for the first time
at 10:00 last night.

26
00:00:54,567 --> 00:00:56,768
I liked it a little bit less
at 2:00 a.m.

27
00:00:56,836 --> 00:00:58,003
And now I'm kind of hoping that

28
00:00:58,071 --> 00:00:59,671
the sun comes up,
thaws that river

29
00:00:59,739 --> 00:01:00,873
and that woman drowns.

30
00:01:00,940 --> 00:01:02,640
Get out!

31
00:01:09,443 --> 00:01:10,809
Russell was perfect.

32
00:01:10,840 --> 00:01:12,207
What's wrong with me?

33
00:01:12,212 --> 00:01:13,379
Am I self-sabotaging?

34
00:01:13,407 --> 00:01:15,290
Am I secretly a Cylon?

35
00:01:15,325 --> 00:01:16,661
You just didn't love him.

36
00:01:16,688 --> 00:01:18,122
But what if it's me?

37
00:01:18,190 --> 00:01:20,352
What if I have some idea
of love in my head

38
00:01:20,368 --> 00:01:21,706
and it's just totally wrong?

39
00:01:21,721 --> 00:01:23,901
Do not second-guess
yourself, okay?

40
00:01:23,929 --> 00:01:27,921
It was a tough choice,
but it was the right choice.

41
00:01:28,231 --> 00:01:29,732
Yeah, mm-hmm.

42
00:01:30,200 --> 00:01:32,702
So what do you think
about turning off that song?

43
00:01:32,737 --> 00:01:34,724
- I just feel like I should...
- Off. Turn it off.

44
00:01:37,307 --> 00:01:37,973
Ow.

45
00:01:38,041 --> 00:01:39,242
# It's coming on Christmas... #

46
00:01:40,878 --> 00:01:43,145
- Oh, my God, she's dead!
- Oh, no, no, come on!

47
00:01:43,213 --> 00:01:45,347
80 more times!
I get it now! It's a river!

48
00:01:45,415 --> 00:01:48,284
All right, now let's
go and get a drink,

49
00:01:48,351 --> 00:01:50,685
because you really need
to get out of this room.

50
00:01:50,753 --> 00:01:51,686
I'm not ready.

51
00:01:51,754 --> 00:01:53,289
Turn that song back on!

52
00:01:53,356 --> 00:01:55,590
Caroline and I made up
a dance routine to cheer you up.

53
00:01:55,658 --> 00:01:57,236
- No, you didn't.
- Yeah, well, I'm gonna dance,

54
00:01:57,255 --> 00:01:58,940
- and Nick's gonna clap.
- Okay. I'll just clap.

55
00:01:59,605 --> 00:02:01,007
You about ready now?

56
00:02:01,106 --> 00:02:02,506
- Yeah, I'm ready now.
- Yeah, let's go.

57
00:02:02,597 --> 00:02:03,932
Uh, feel it.
Uh, uh.

58
00:02:03,999 --> 00:02:05,199
Get it, Caroline!
Get it, Caroline!

59
00:02:05,267 --> 00:02:06,700
Born to dance.

60
00:02:06,768 --> 00:02:07,768
Dance the bump.

61
00:02:11,040 --> 00:02:13,207
# Who's that girl? #
# <i>Who's that girl?</i> #

62
00:02:13,208 --> 00:02:17,126
1x23
<i>- Backslide -</i>

63
00:02:17,778 --> 00:02:19,079
I'm gonna end up alone.

64
00:02:19,147 --> 00:02:20,713
I'm gonna be a single old lady

65
00:02:20,781 --> 00:02:22,349
flashing people on the subway.

66
00:02:22,417 --> 00:02:24,651
Jess, first of all,
you're never gonna be old,

67
00:02:24,718 --> 00:02:27,654
because humans--
we're gonna be immortal by 2026.

68
00:02:27,721 --> 00:02:29,256
And second of all,
give me your phone.

69
00:02:29,324 --> 00:02:30,256
Why?

70
00:02:30,324 --> 00:02:31,958
Do you want to drunkenly call

71
00:02:32,025 --> 00:02:34,126
Russell tonight and tell him
what a huge mistake you made?

72
00:02:34,194 --> 00:02:36,128
- You don't want to backslide, trust me.
- Be quiet.

73
00:02:36,196 --> 00:02:37,696
Your life is
too perfect to talk to

74
00:02:37,764 --> 00:02:38,831
anyone in Jess's condition
right now.

75
00:02:38,898 --> 00:02:40,732
Look, Jess, backsliding is

76
00:02:40,800 --> 00:02:42,534
what happens
after a clean break.

77
00:02:42,602 --> 00:02:45,204
When you, when you freak out
and you go crawling back

78
00:02:45,272 --> 00:02:47,605
and you just make everything
messy and horrible.

79
00:02:47,673 --> 00:02:49,174
- I'm not gonna do that.
- You have backslider

80
00:02:49,241 --> 00:02:51,076
written all over you.

81
00:02:51,143 --> 00:02:52,710
Did I tell you
guys that my boss

82
00:02:52,778 --> 00:02:54,545
invited me to play poker
with him tonight?

83
00:02:54,613 --> 00:02:56,481
Crazy thing, he never invites
anybody to play poker with him.

84
00:02:56,548 --> 00:02:58,583
I mean, come on, I'm in
the prime of my life, baby.

85
00:02:58,650 --> 00:02:59,817
- Winston, shut up!
- Shut up!

86
00:02:59,885 --> 00:03:00,952
Schmidt, I actually

87
00:03:01,020 --> 00:03:01,986
- need my phone back.
- No.

88
00:03:02,053 --> 00:03:03,454
I need to call Russell to just

89
00:03:03,521 --> 00:03:04,821
tell him I left
my pajamas there.

90
00:03:04,889 --> 00:03:06,523
The fact that you were
wearing pajamas

91
00:03:06,591 --> 00:03:08,525
in the presence of your lover
tells me that that relationship

92
00:03:08,593 --> 00:03:09,793
was doomed from the start.
No way.

93
00:03:09,861 --> 00:03:11,095
Disgusting.

94
00:03:11,162 --> 00:03:12,696
Don't fake me--
don't fake me out.

95
00:03:12,763 --> 00:03:14,064
Are you guys playing a game?

96
00:03:14,132 --> 00:03:15,065
No. No. Just chillin'.

97
00:03:15,133 --> 00:03:16,300
Hey, good-lookin'.

98
00:03:16,368 --> 00:03:17,767
- Hey.
- What can I get you?

99
00:03:17,835 --> 00:03:19,735
How about one of those
Nick Miller Manhattans?

100
00:03:19,803 --> 00:03:21,604
Ah, straight bourbon
in a plastic cup.

101
00:03:22,706 --> 00:03:24,440
Come with me.

102
00:03:26,676 --> 00:03:27,743
Think we should
show him the DVD?

103
00:03:27,811 --> 00:03:29,879
What DVD?

104
00:03:29,946 --> 00:03:33,383
Nick made a DVD after the last
time Caroline broke up with him.

105
00:03:33,450 --> 00:03:35,550
It's all the reasons why they
shouldn't get back together.

106
00:03:35,618 --> 00:03:36,784
We hid it somewhere in the loft.

107
00:03:36,852 --> 00:03:38,653
Ooh. Intrigue.

108
00:03:38,721 --> 00:03:40,889
- Mama like.
- I don't know that we should...

109
00:03:40,956 --> 00:03:42,991
Cece's here.

110
00:03:43,059 --> 00:03:44,659
Why is she dressed like
a women's studies major?

111
00:03:44,727 --> 00:03:45,894
It's precautionary.

112
00:03:45,961 --> 00:03:47,095
Just until my junk heals.

113
00:03:47,163 --> 00:03:48,696
Ow. Owie.

114
00:03:48,764 --> 00:03:49,764
Damn it.

115
00:03:49,832 --> 00:03:50,731
You okay?

116
00:03:50,798 --> 00:03:51,865
No, I'm not okay.

117
00:03:51,933 --> 00:03:53,567
What is going on, Jess?

118
00:03:53,635 --> 00:03:55,336
I was just thinking
about this word

119
00:03:55,404 --> 00:03:57,538
that I learned from Schmidt.

120
00:03:57,605 --> 00:03:59,206
Backsliding.

121
00:03:59,274 --> 00:04:00,977
Oh, so you're saying
I'm a backslider.

122
00:04:01,011 --> 00:04:03,095
I don't know what we're supposed
to do together any more.

123
00:04:03,117 --> 00:04:05,042
Everything seems
to turn you on.

124
00:04:05,080 --> 00:04:07,847
Oh, look, Cece, a bird.
Ow. Ah, damn it!

125
00:04:07,915 --> 00:04:10,917
Schmidt, it's a mother bird
in her nest!

126
00:04:10,984 --> 00:04:12,285
Must I say it, Cece?

127
00:04:12,353 --> 00:04:13,453
What?

128
00:04:13,521 --> 00:04:14,820
- Eggs.
- Okay.

129
00:04:16,823 --> 00:04:18,591
Okay, sure, look, did Caroline

130
00:04:18,659 --> 00:04:22,361
physically, mentally and
emotionally abuse me for years?

131
00:04:22,729 --> 00:04:23,762
Yes!

132
00:04:24,329 --> 00:04:25,797
But she changed.

133
00:04:25,865 --> 00:04:27,666
It's about timing.

134
00:04:27,733 --> 00:04:30,069
And the first time around,
we weren't ready to work at it,

135
00:04:30,136 --> 00:04:31,537
and now we are.

136
00:04:31,604 --> 00:04:32,637
And besides,

137
00:04:32,705 --> 00:04:34,606
Caroline is way hotter than

138
00:04:34,674 --> 00:04:37,842
that voice in my head,
who sounds like Tom Waits

139
00:04:37,910 --> 00:04:40,644
and tells me I'm a failure
and that I look bad in hats.

140
00:04:40,712 --> 00:04:42,746
I don't want to spend
my whole life with him.

141
00:04:42,814 --> 00:04:44,415
You know what I mean?

142
00:04:44,483 --> 00:04:46,184
Okay.

143
00:04:46,251 --> 00:04:47,985
At least you'll get
a break from me tomorrow.

144
00:04:48,053 --> 00:04:49,454
I've got to go visit my <i>dadi.</i>

145
00:04:49,521 --> 00:04:50,354
What?

146
00:04:50,422 --> 00:04:51,755
It's my grandmother.

147
00:04:51,823 --> 00:04:53,257
- Oh, your <i>bubbe?</i>
- Yes, my...

148
00:04:53,325 --> 00:04:55,024
Oh, I have a <i>bubbe.</i>

149
00:04:55,093 --> 00:04:56,893
- Uh, my <i>bubbe</i> is in a home.
- Yeah.

150
00:04:56,961 --> 00:04:58,462
Old people freak me out.

151
00:04:58,529 --> 00:05:01,231
With their hands
and their legs.

152
00:05:01,299 --> 00:05:04,201
Just, they're like the human
version of pleated pants.

153
00:05:04,768 --> 00:05:05,935
- Really?
- Not for me.

154
00:05:06,003 --> 00:05:06,936
- Hey, Schmidt.
- Hey.

155
00:05:07,004 --> 00:05:07,804
Can I borrow your jacket?

156
00:05:07,871 --> 00:05:08,972
- Yeah, sure.
- Thanks.

157
00:05:09,039 --> 00:05:10,539
Like, aren't into old people?

158
00:05:10,607 --> 00:05:11,640
Not at all.

159
00:05:11,708 --> 00:05:13,109
I mean, just-just horr...

160
00:05:13,176 --> 00:05:14,477
like giant walking raisins.

161
00:05:14,544 --> 00:05:15,444
They're in a home...

162
00:05:15,512 --> 00:05:17,446
It's me.

163
00:05:17,514 --> 00:05:19,815
I've been thinking
a lot about you.

164
00:05:19,882 --> 00:05:20,716
Jess.

165
00:05:20,783 --> 00:05:22,017
Hmm?

166
00:05:22,085 --> 00:05:25,121
I can't feel my arm.

167
00:05:27,791 --> 00:05:28,969
Oh.

168
00:05:29,091 --> 00:05:30,493
Whoa.

169
00:05:30,516 --> 00:05:32,785
I really can't feel it at all.

170
00:05:33,195 --> 00:05:34,462
Wake up, fella.

171
00:05:34,530 --> 00:05:36,564
You're gonna be late for school.

172
00:05:38,267 --> 00:05:39,833
Genzlinger.

173
00:05:44,525 --> 00:05:47,147
What is that?

174
00:05:47,259 --> 00:05:49,103
It's an earring, man.
What does it look like?

175
00:05:49,196 --> 00:05:50,597
Got kind of wasted
last night with Joe,

176
00:05:50,665 --> 00:05:52,276
and so, you know,
I got my ear pierced.

177
00:05:52,698 --> 00:05:54,781
This is the perfect moment.

178
00:05:55,858 --> 00:05:57,374
Wait, I'm gonna do it.
I'm gonna do it.

179
00:05:57,416 --> 00:05:58,532
- Wait, what?
- I'm gonna do.

180
00:05:58,547 --> 00:06:00,564
See, this is when
it gets weird between us.

181
00:06:00,607 --> 00:06:01,440
One, two, three.

182
00:06:02,809 --> 00:06:04,209
You know,
traditionally, the male

183
00:06:04,277 --> 00:06:05,377
of the species is
more glamorous.

184
00:06:05,945 --> 00:06:07,580
When's it coming out,
by the way?

185
00:06:07,647 --> 00:06:10,182
- The earring? - No, no, the smooth
jazz album you're dropping.

186
00:06:12,552 --> 00:06:15,888
Hey, guys. You
remember, um, Paul.

187
00:06:15,956 --> 00:06:17,522
Mercedes-Genz!

188
00:06:17,556 --> 00:06:19,056
Genzel Washington.

189
00:06:19,157 --> 00:06:21,659
It's the Genz of the world
as we know it.

190
00:06:21,727 --> 00:06:24,428
All right, everybody, put down
your Genz and your Genzils.

191
00:06:24,530 --> 00:06:25,897
Hey, Schmidt.
What's up, Washington?

192
00:06:27,366 --> 00:06:28,800
- Um hey.
- Hey.

193
00:06:28,868 --> 00:06:30,568
- So maybe--
- Okay.

194
00:06:30,636 --> 00:06:32,403
- We definitely--
- Oh yeah, that sounds...

195
00:06:32,504 --> 00:06:34,471
Okay.

196
00:06:34,506 --> 00:06:35,539
Okay.

197
00:06:35,607 --> 00:06:37,340
- Okay
- All right.

198
00:06:39,577 --> 00:06:40,878
- Backslider!
- Don't.

199
00:06:40,945 --> 00:06:41,912
- You backslid.
- Come on.

200
00:06:41,980 --> 00:06:43,981
You backslid all the way

201
00:06:44,048 --> 00:06:46,517
down the hill and back
into the parking lot.

202
00:06:46,584 --> 00:06:48,184
Take off your skis and wait

203
00:06:48,252 --> 00:06:50,085
for your family in the lodge,
Jessica Day.

204
00:06:50,153 --> 00:06:51,654
Look, I think
this could be good.

205
00:06:51,722 --> 00:06:53,856
Paul and I had
really bad timing before,

206
00:06:53,924 --> 00:06:56,358
and maybe I should just
give it another shot.

207
00:06:56,426 --> 00:06:57,493
Such an ugly crier.

208
00:06:57,561 --> 00:06:59,294
He is the all-time worst crier.

209
00:07:07,503 --> 00:07:09,838
It's like
he's a slow-motion sneeze.

210
00:07:09,905 --> 00:07:10,633
Winston,

211
00:07:10,656 --> 00:07:11,889
what is in your ear?

212
00:07:11,955 --> 00:07:12,789
It's hot and I love it.

213
00:07:12,819 --> 00:07:13,929
Does that feed information

214
00:07:13,967 --> 00:07:16,484
back to Shelby to keep track
of your migration patterns?

215
00:07:16,530 --> 00:07:17,804
- Drop it.
- Please, Jess.

216
00:07:17,841 --> 00:07:19,017
He just got back from Carnival.

217
00:07:19,048 --> 00:07:20,214
Know what?

218
00:07:22,551 --> 00:07:24,451
These people are disgusting.

219
00:07:24,519 --> 00:07:26,020
I've never been more
flaccid in my life.

220
00:07:27,055 --> 00:07:27,988
Thank God.

221
00:07:28,056 --> 00:07:29,657
I mean, this place

222
00:07:29,724 --> 00:07:31,391
is a cardigan gold mine.

223
00:07:31,459 --> 00:07:32,392
Can I get you anything, Dadi?

224
00:07:32,460 --> 00:07:34,428
A hot-blooded man

225
00:07:34,495 --> 00:07:36,263
and a hotel room would be nice.

226
00:07:37,397 --> 00:07:39,032
Oh, just get me a puzzle.

227
00:07:40,923 --> 00:07:42,028
Yeah?

228
00:07:42,087 --> 00:07:43,787
I raised that girl.

229
00:07:44,230 --> 00:07:46,264
She is my life.

230
00:07:46,473 --> 00:07:48,714
And she's not
as tough as she looks.

231
00:07:48,792 --> 00:07:50,703
If you hurt her,

232
00:07:50,715 --> 00:07:54,520
I will let myself die
and then I will haunt you.

233
00:07:55,848 --> 00:07:57,668
Whoa, look at this fireplace.

234
00:07:57,711 --> 00:07:58,692
It's huge.

235
00:07:58,746 --> 00:08:01,030
Caroline, that is not a
fireplace, that is, like,

236
00:08:01,049 --> 00:08:03,117
a room you could
safely set on fire.

237
00:08:03,907 --> 00:08:05,427
Yeah, this is really nice.

238
00:08:05,466 --> 00:08:06,686
- It is.
- So grown up.

239
00:08:06,734 --> 00:08:08,865
But where's all your stuff
gonna go?

240
00:08:08,880 --> 00:08:12,160
Like, where will
the Grateful Dead bears dance?

241
00:08:12,195 --> 00:08:13,830
Oh, I didn't realize
I lived here, too.

242
00:08:13,873 --> 00:08:16,408
Seriously though, what do
you think about moving in?

243
00:08:16,735 --> 00:08:18,678
Wait, you want to
move in together?

244
00:08:18,706 --> 00:08:21,374
Yeah, I mean, I feel like
if we're gonna do this again,

245
00:08:21,415 --> 00:08:23,478
we should do it
for real this time, you know?

246
00:08:23,506 --> 00:08:24,251
Right.

247
00:08:24,278 --> 00:08:25,853
I mean, I'm 33 years old.

248
00:08:25,876 --> 00:08:28,056
You're 30 years old; we're the
same age, you knucklehead.

249
00:08:28,093 --> 00:08:31,362
No, I lied about that.
I'm 33.

250
00:08:31,516 --> 00:08:33,517
I don't want to start
at the beginning again with you.

251
00:08:34,413 --> 00:08:39,736
I mean, you're not...
not making sense.

252
00:08:40,965 --> 00:08:41,998
Knock-knock.

253
00:08:42,066 --> 00:08:42,999
Hi.

254
00:08:43,067 --> 00:08:44,501
Hi back.

255
00:08:44,569 --> 00:08:46,102
- Um...
- Hey...

256
00:08:46,170 --> 00:08:47,771
- I want to tell you...
- I have something to tell you.

257
00:08:47,839 --> 00:08:49,701
- Oh, sorry, you go first.
- Oh, I'll go first.

258
00:08:49,773 --> 00:08:53,140
Um, I was thinking
a lot about, um...

259
00:08:53,945 --> 00:08:56,679
you and last night.

260
00:08:56,747 --> 00:08:58,881
Right.

261
00:08:58,949 --> 00:09:01,417
And we have something good.

262
00:09:01,485 --> 00:09:04,320
Jess, I have a girlfriend.

263
00:09:04,387 --> 00:09:05,855
- What?
- Yeah.

264
00:09:05,923 --> 00:09:08,424
Very serious girlfriend.

265
00:09:08,492 --> 00:09:09,525
Oh, my God.

266
00:09:09,593 --> 00:09:11,160
Why didn't you tell me?

267
00:09:11,227 --> 00:09:13,495
When you called me
last night, we had just gotten

268
00:09:13,563 --> 00:09:16,030
into this huge fight,
and I was really confused.

269
00:09:16,098 --> 00:09:17,999
You cheating on her with me?

270
00:09:18,067 --> 00:09:19,367
Is that bad?
That's bad.

271
00:09:19,435 --> 00:09:20,735
It's really bad.

272
00:09:20,803 --> 00:09:22,904
Oh, no, that's really bad.

273
00:09:22,972 --> 00:09:24,873
Why would you do that?!

274
00:09:24,941 --> 00:09:26,407
Now I know what Bill Clinton
feels like.

275
00:09:26,476 --> 00:09:28,576
Now I know
how Monica Lewinsky feels!

276
00:09:28,643 --> 00:09:30,711
I'm sorry I made you
feel like Monica Lewinsky.

277
00:09:30,779 --> 00:09:31,479
Stop crying!

278
00:09:31,546 --> 00:09:33,246
You are literally

279
00:09:33,314 --> 00:09:35,315
the ugliest crier
I have ever seen!

280
00:09:35,383 --> 00:09:37,451
You cry smile.

281
00:09:37,519 --> 00:09:38,752
Hey, babe, I'm here for lunch.

282
00:09:38,820 --> 00:09:40,454
- Oh!
- Oh.

283
00:09:40,522 --> 00:09:42,089
Oh, no, are you crying?

284
00:09:42,156 --> 00:09:45,091
Is everything okay?

285
00:09:45,658 --> 00:09:47,827
There's-there's...

286
00:09:48,128 --> 00:09:50,262
I'm sorry to have to
break it to you,

287
00:09:50,330 --> 00:09:51,316
but that is the way

288
00:09:51,339 --> 00:09:53,620
the electoral college works,
man.

289
00:09:53,667 --> 00:09:56,302
It-it seems so unfair.

290
00:09:56,370 --> 00:09:58,337
So votes don't mean as much.

291
00:09:58,405 --> 00:09:59,710
It upsets me, too.

292
00:10:06,198 --> 00:10:07,513
I'm gonna miss you, Winston.

293
00:10:07,551 --> 00:10:08,935
- What do you mean?
- I'm gonna miss you

294
00:10:09,002 --> 00:10:10,903
when your caravan moves on
to the next village.

295
00:10:12,440 --> 00:10:13,906
Oh, my God!

296
00:10:14,474 --> 00:10:16,209
He has a girlfriend!

297
00:10:16,276 --> 00:10:17,843
He cheated on his girlfriend

298
00:10:17,911 --> 00:10:18,978
with me.

299
00:10:19,046 --> 00:10:20,045
I'm a cheater.

300
00:10:20,112 --> 00:10:21,513
P. Genz played you?

301
00:10:21,581 --> 00:10:22,514
I saw her.

302
00:10:22,582 --> 00:10:25,283
She looks like an Asian me.

303
00:10:25,952 --> 00:10:28,453
Asian Jess. Wo-- Ow.

304
00:10:28,520 --> 00:10:29,854
I can't even backslide right.

305
00:10:29,922 --> 00:10:30,922
I've been her.

306
00:10:30,990 --> 00:10:32,824
I've been Asian me before.

307
00:10:32,891 --> 00:10:34,392
Are you gonna keep calling her
"Asian me,"

308
00:10:34,460 --> 00:10:35,660
because it's becoming
a problem for me.

309
00:10:35,727 --> 00:10:37,328
I don't know her name, Schmidt.

310
00:10:37,395 --> 00:10:39,396
But I do know
that if I were her,

311
00:10:39,464 --> 00:10:42,032
I would want to know what kind
of person I was dating.

312
00:10:42,100 --> 00:10:43,800
And that's why
I have to tell her.

313
00:10:43,868 --> 00:10:45,402
- What? No, don't do that.
- Please don't do that.

314
00:10:45,470 --> 00:10:46,837
Mm-mm. Sometimes, when
you make a mistake,

315
00:10:46,904 --> 00:10:49,606
all you can do is own up to it,
all right?

316
00:10:49,674 --> 00:10:51,308
Because it's something
you can't fix.

317
00:10:51,376 --> 00:10:52,145
Knowledge.

318
00:10:52,182 --> 00:10:53,780
Take it easy,
black George Michael.

319
00:10:53,944 --> 00:10:54,877
I have to do it.

320
00:10:54,945 --> 00:10:56,912
I have to tell her.

321
00:10:56,981 --> 00:10:59,115
61 years we've been together.

322
00:10:59,183 --> 00:11:00,116
14 presidents

323
00:11:00,184 --> 00:11:02,518
and four different Batmen.

324
00:11:02,586 --> 00:11:04,203
Why don't we go for a walk?

325
00:11:04,269 --> 00:11:05,586
I'm just gonna go get
your sweater.

326
00:11:05,609 --> 00:11:06,992
- I'll be back in a second.
- Oh, thanks, sweetie.

327
00:11:07,036 --> 00:11:08,674
- Give me one second.
- Wow,

328
00:11:08,717 --> 00:11:11,260
so you guys are like
real live Yodas, huh?

329
00:11:11,334 --> 00:11:12,771
Can I ask you a question?

330
00:11:12,816 --> 00:11:14,466
- Yeah.
- Shoot, cowboy.

331
00:11:14,518 --> 00:11:16,040
How do you build a relationship?

332
00:11:16,090 --> 00:11:17,656
How 'bout Viagra?

333
00:11:17,833 --> 00:11:19,834
I use it just to keep
from falling out of bed.

334
00:11:19,902 --> 00:11:21,769
How does a guy like me
have a chance

335
00:11:21,837 --> 00:11:23,671
at making someone
like Cece happy?

336
00:11:23,739 --> 00:11:26,240
You don't. Not with all those
moles on your face.

337
00:11:26,308 --> 00:11:28,709
- I should just give up, huh?
- That's crazy!

338
00:11:28,776 --> 00:11:29,710
She needs you!

339
00:11:31,714 --> 00:11:33,714
You are exactly what she needs.

340
00:11:37,519 --> 00:11:38,719
Here's your sweater, Dadi.

341
00:11:38,786 --> 00:11:40,320
Oh, thank you.

342
00:11:40,388 --> 00:11:42,122
Um, I'll meet you out there
in a second, okay?

343
00:11:42,189 --> 00:11:43,423
Okay.

344
00:11:44,491 --> 00:11:45,925
Take it easy, Burt.

345
00:11:48,794 --> 00:11:50,496
You know, for the first
time in my life

346
00:11:50,564 --> 00:11:53,900
I actually feel like I want
something that lasts.

347
00:11:56,336 --> 00:11:57,837
And I want it with you.

348
00:11:57,905 --> 00:12:01,941
I feel... the same way.

349
00:12:02,009 --> 00:12:03,942
You do?

350
00:12:04,010 --> 00:12:05,944
Oh!

351
00:12:06,012 --> 00:12:07,679
- It hurts so bad, because...
- What's turning you on?

352
00:12:07,747 --> 00:12:08,914
- Oh...
- The queen of diamonds?

353
00:12:08,981 --> 00:12:10,582
- The bow?
- Oh, my God.

354
00:12:10,650 --> 00:12:11,950
The teeth in the glass?

355
00:12:12,018 --> 00:12:13,451
I care about you so much.

356
00:12:13,519 --> 00:12:15,420
- The leaf painting?
- But...

357
00:12:15,487 --> 00:12:17,856
Is emotional intimacy
turning you on?

358
00:12:20,025 --> 00:12:21,825
Are you in that much pain?

359
00:12:22,393 --> 00:12:23,360
Uh, he passed out.

360
00:12:23,428 --> 00:12:24,695
We need help!

361
00:12:24,763 --> 00:12:26,326
Yo. What's up, man?

362
00:12:26,374 --> 00:12:27,807
- How'd the audition go?
- What?

363
00:12:27,929 --> 00:12:29,996
- For the Disney pirate movie?
- Ha-ha.

364
00:12:30,018 --> 00:12:31,207
Hey, Mr. T called.

365
00:12:31,238 --> 00:12:33,315
He wants to punch you because
that earring looks stupid.

366
00:12:33,355 --> 00:12:34,442
I mean, Lil' Wayne
wears it, so...

367
00:12:34,480 --> 00:12:36,255
Oh, Little Wayne Gonzales
from Brazil?

368
00:12:36,428 --> 00:12:38,936
Who came to the United States
to dance and be free!

369
00:12:39,062 --> 00:12:40,863
You can't touch me, baby.
I'm in the prime of my life.

370
00:12:41,378 --> 00:12:43,237
Tell me, what are you doing?
What you been doing all day?

371
00:12:43,272 --> 00:12:45,574
Oh, I'm actually looking for
an apartment. It's for Caroline.

372
00:12:45,617 --> 00:12:47,480
She's looking for a new
apartment, and she asked me if

373
00:12:47,511 --> 00:12:49,435
I wanted to move in with her,
and I'm thinking about it.

374
00:12:49,519 --> 00:12:52,266
Cool! Cool, cool,
sounds like so much fun.

375
00:12:52,289 --> 00:12:54,157
I'm really glad that's your
reaction, because I thought

376
00:12:54,183 --> 00:12:55,946
you were going to tell me
I was making a huge mistake.

377
00:12:55,954 --> 00:12:57,094
Honestly, I didn't
want to hear that.

378
00:12:57,120 --> 00:12:59,321
Wouldn't do that,
that'd be silly.

379
00:13:04,400 --> 00:13:06,525
What are you doing? Huh? What?

380
00:13:06,585 --> 00:13:07,916
No, Nick...
No, no, no! No!

381
00:13:07,936 --> 00:13:10,903
Nick. Nick. Nick, Nick!
Nick! Don't!

382
00:13:10,937 --> 00:13:12,141
It's for your own good.

383
00:13:12,158 --> 00:13:13,926
- Get out of there!
- What are you...? No, Schmidt!

384
00:13:13,961 --> 00:13:15,292
Grab him!
Okay, grab him.

385
00:13:15,340 --> 00:13:16,146
You got him?

386
00:13:16,229 --> 00:13:17,671
- Watch the television.
- You got him?

387
00:13:17,696 --> 00:13:18,673
Watch it. Watch it.

388
00:13:18,704 --> 00:13:20,399
Watch the television.
Watch the TV...

389
00:13:20,436 --> 00:13:21,803
All right, all right,
watch the TV.

390
00:13:21,854 --> 00:13:23,021
- Hello, Nick...
- No!

391
00:13:23,135 --> 00:13:24,569
In all its glory, watch it.

392
00:13:24,714 --> 00:13:26,882
- You magnificent dumb-ass.
- Come on.

393
00:13:27,021 --> 00:13:28,500
If you're watching this,

394
00:13:28,531 --> 00:13:30,599
it's because you decided
to get back with Caroline.

395
00:13:30,664 --> 00:13:32,264
Yes, Nick. I did.

396
00:13:32,332 --> 00:13:34,099
Well, congratulations,
you idiot.

397
00:13:34,167 --> 00:13:36,802
- She destroyed you.
- You don't know me, you jerk!

398
00:13:36,870 --> 00:13:38,871
These, my dumb friend,
are your tears.

399
00:13:38,938 --> 00:13:40,805
- And you saved them all.
- I got him, I got him.

400
00:13:40,837 --> 00:13:42,094
Think back, Nick, Stay still.

401
00:13:42,131 --> 00:13:43,428
Or whatever they call you
in your time.

402
00:13:43,509 --> 00:13:45,477
Who dumped you three times?

403
00:13:45,544 --> 00:13:47,879
Once before you had to speak
at your brother's wedding.

404
00:13:47,946 --> 00:13:49,449
Well, he's divorced now,
so I'll get another shot.

405
00:13:49,490 --> 00:13:51,092
- This is a poem you wrote about Caroline...
- I don't want the poem.

406
00:13:51,149 --> 00:13:52,550
- I don't want the poem.
- You're getting the poem.

407
00:13:52,618 --> 00:13:54,419
But you're too emotional
to read it right now.

408
00:13:54,487 --> 00:13:56,620
You're going to give it
to Schmidt for safekeeping.

409
00:14:00,525 --> 00:14:02,125
This is your doing, Caroline.

410
00:14:02,193 --> 00:14:03,694
You were right to
have trusted me.

411
00:14:03,762 --> 00:14:05,829
Two years I held this thing.

412
00:14:05,897 --> 00:14:07,798
- Read it.
Here they come.

413
00:14:07,866 --> 00:14:09,299
Okay.

414
00:14:09,367 --> 00:14:12,468
"Shall I compare thee
to a summer's day?

415
00:14:12,536 --> 00:14:15,304
No, a summer's day
is not a bitch."

416
00:14:15,372 --> 00:14:17,440
Really, Nick?

417
00:14:17,508 --> 00:14:18,961
That's how you want
to talk about Caroline?

418
00:14:19,005 --> 00:14:20,661
I can't move, my
earring is stuck.

419
00:14:20,688 --> 00:14:22,258
But there's something
I want to do to you, then.

420
00:14:22,302 --> 00:14:24,111
Don't move, don't move.
Don't move, Nick, don't move!

421
00:14:24,157 --> 00:14:25,501
Let's have a conversation like men!
Let's act like men, Nick! Ah!

422
00:14:25,556 --> 00:14:27,156
You want to act like men,
let's act like men.

423
00:14:27,243 --> 00:14:29,822
Look at how far
you've come, Nick.

424
00:14:29,854 --> 00:14:32,214
- Want to be a bartender forever, pal?
- I'm still a bartender.

425
00:14:32,254 --> 00:14:33,955
You want to be a grown man

426
00:14:34,023 --> 00:14:36,825
who dresses like an unsponsored
professional skateboarder?

427
00:14:36,893 --> 00:14:39,294
You don't want to live like
this. You're moving on.

428
00:14:39,361 --> 00:14:40,896
I'm here to tell you
you're doing the right thing,

429
00:14:40,963 --> 00:14:42,464
so just keep going.

430
00:14:42,532 --> 00:14:45,399
Can I talk to you Nick-to-Nick
for a second?

431
00:14:45,467 --> 00:14:47,968
I respect you, man.
You're rocking the hell

432
00:14:48,036 --> 00:14:50,304
out of that beard,
and the long hair looks good,

433
00:14:50,371 --> 00:14:51,972
despite what other people
are gonna say.

434
00:14:52,040 --> 00:14:53,908
Look, the Caroline
that broke your heart,

435
00:14:53,967 --> 00:14:55,947
I get why you don't like her.

436
00:14:55,978 --> 00:14:57,579
But it's a different Caroline
that's picking me up

437
00:14:57,649 --> 00:14:59,482
in five minutes, Nick.

438
00:15:00,018 --> 00:15:01,956
Do you want me to live alone
in this loft

439
00:15:01,982 --> 00:15:03,482
for the rest of my life?

440
00:15:03,551 --> 00:15:06,820
Hey, what's the difference
between me and Bill Cosby?

441
00:15:06,887 --> 00:15:09,123
Well, thanks, guys. You helped
me figure something out.

442
00:15:09,148 --> 00:15:10,744
All right, well, look,

443
00:15:10,758 --> 00:15:12,892
I think this was a really
nice talk, Future Nick.

444
00:15:12,960 --> 00:15:15,127
I hope you got something from
it, 'cause I know that I did.

445
00:15:17,129 --> 00:15:18,597
I'm gonna call her.

446
00:15:18,631 --> 00:15:20,799
- I have to call..
- No! Damn it, give me the phone.

447
00:15:20,836 --> 00:15:22,867
- Please get out of here, I have to call...
Coach! He's calling her again.

448
00:15:22,902 --> 00:15:26,472
- We lost him.
- We sure did, Captain Black Sparrow.

449
00:15:26,539 --> 00:15:28,006
- Hey, Paul.
- Hey.

450
00:15:28,074 --> 00:15:30,108
I'm not going to let you
lie to your girlfriend.

451
00:15:30,176 --> 00:15:32,209
Okay? It's not fair to her.

452
00:15:32,277 --> 00:15:34,745
So you have to tell her
what happened between us.

453
00:15:34,813 --> 00:15:36,013
Or I will.

454
00:15:36,081 --> 00:15:38,148
All right.
You're right.

455
00:15:38,215 --> 00:15:40,271
- I have to tell her.
- Yeah.

456
00:15:40,323 --> 00:15:42,544
I'm so scared, though.
I don't want to lose her, Jess.

457
00:15:42,587 --> 00:15:43,738
She's my soul mate.

458
00:15:43,774 --> 00:15:46,190
For someone with a soul mate,
you sure did have sex with me.

459
00:15:46,257 --> 00:15:48,525
I know. I know, and I don't
expect you to believe me--

460
00:15:48,593 --> 00:15:50,293
I wouldn't believe me
if I were you--

461
00:15:50,361 --> 00:15:52,662
but check it out.

462
00:15:52,730 --> 00:15:54,831
I even bought her
an engagement ring.

463
00:15:56,299 --> 00:15:57,368
Oh...

464
00:15:58,208 --> 00:16:00,382
That's... that's
really beautiful.

465
00:16:00,423 --> 00:16:02,146
I've been carrying it around
in my pocket for two weeks,

466
00:16:02,206 --> 00:16:03,772
trying to find the right way
to propose to her.

467
00:16:03,840 --> 00:16:06,341
And I just started panicking,
and I got...

468
00:16:06,409 --> 00:16:09,277
I don't know, I got scared,
and-and-and really confused,

469
00:16:09,345 --> 00:16:11,146
and I'm so sorry
to drag you into this,

470
00:16:11,214 --> 00:16:12,648
but this was the biggest
mistake of my life.

471
00:16:12,716 --> 00:16:14,717
God, Paul, don't make me
feel sorry for you.

472
00:16:14,784 --> 00:16:15,985
I know. I messed up.

473
00:16:16,052 --> 00:16:17,753
Big-time.

474
00:16:17,821 --> 00:16:18,954
And I'm going to lose her.

475
00:16:19,022 --> 00:16:20,922
Oh, God, I can't lose her!

476
00:16:20,990 --> 00:16:23,324
Hey, babe, you left
your tuner in my car.

477
00:16:23,392 --> 00:16:25,960
Oh. Hi!
You're Jess, right?

478
00:16:26,028 --> 00:16:27,194
I'm Jenn.

479
00:16:27,262 --> 00:16:28,997
Jenn.

480
00:16:31,934 --> 00:16:33,701
Well, I was just leaving.

481
00:16:33,769 --> 00:16:36,503
- Jess and I slept together.
- Oh, God.

482
00:16:36,571 --> 00:16:38,304
- What? - I want to be
completely honest with you.

483
00:16:38,372 --> 00:16:40,173
It happened two days ago,
and we did lots of stuff.

484
00:16:40,241 --> 00:16:42,342
There was talking,
and there were hands,

485
00:16:42,410 --> 00:16:44,477
- and I think we ruined a throw pillow.
- He's making it sound

486
00:16:44,546 --> 00:16:46,079
a lot more erotic than it was.

487
00:16:46,147 --> 00:16:48,782
It was just, like,
lying there and... blah.

488
00:16:48,850 --> 00:16:50,651
I am so sorry.

489
00:16:50,718 --> 00:16:52,418
I'm... I'm begging you
to forgive me.

490
00:16:52,485 --> 00:16:54,386
I thought you loved me.

491
00:16:54,454 --> 00:16:55,755
I'm so sorry.

492
00:16:55,822 --> 00:16:57,590
I'm an idiot!

493
00:16:59,426 --> 00:17:01,961
- I'm an idiot, I'm so sorry.
- Oh, my God. No...

494
00:17:02,029 --> 00:17:04,764
Yeah, I'm such an idiot.

495
00:17:04,831 --> 00:17:06,298
Good-bye, Paul.

496
00:17:06,366 --> 00:17:08,499
Oh, no.
Wait. Wait. Jenn?

497
00:17:08,568 --> 00:17:10,134
Haven't you done enough?

498
00:17:10,202 --> 00:17:13,572
Yeah, I have.
I have done enough, but...

499
00:17:15,575 --> 00:17:18,309
I know how you feel.

500
00:17:18,377 --> 00:17:20,879
I've been there.
I've been cheated on before,

501
00:17:20,947 --> 00:17:22,614
and it feels like someone

502
00:17:22,682 --> 00:17:24,414
dropped an anvil on your heart.

503
00:17:24,482 --> 00:17:26,917
Um, but...

504
00:17:26,985 --> 00:17:29,720
That guy wasn't right for me.

505
00:17:30,288 --> 00:17:30,955
You guys...

506
00:17:31,022 --> 00:17:32,756
You guys are perfect together.

507
00:17:34,158 --> 00:17:35,826
I thought you were Asian me,

508
00:17:35,894 --> 00:17:38,929
but now I realize
I'm just Caucasian you.

509
00:17:38,997 --> 00:17:40,262
- What?
- What?

510
00:17:40,330 --> 00:17:41,798
Paul was scared.

511
00:17:41,865 --> 00:17:43,032
And when you're scared,

512
00:17:43,100 --> 00:17:45,034
you do stupid things.

513
00:17:45,102 --> 00:17:47,036
He made a really
terrible mistake.

514
00:17:47,104 --> 00:17:48,972
Really terrible.

515
00:17:49,039 --> 00:17:51,608
The things that we did
48 hours ago were so dark...

516
00:17:51,675 --> 00:17:53,309
- I'm handling this.
- Sorry.

517
00:17:53,376 --> 00:17:55,744
Jenn...

518
00:17:55,812 --> 00:17:57,212
you love Paul.

519
00:17:57,779 --> 00:17:58,780
I know that

520
00:17:58,848 --> 00:18:00,281
because you're still
standing here.

521
00:18:00,349 --> 00:18:02,718
What you guys have...

522
00:18:02,785 --> 00:18:04,319
it's way bigger than me.

523
00:18:05,136 --> 00:18:06,788
And I think...

524
00:18:06,856 --> 00:18:08,624
I think Paul has something
to ask you.

525
00:18:10,126 --> 00:18:12,259
I know this is not
the right time to do this,

526
00:18:12,327 --> 00:18:14,762
in fact, this is
a terrible time to do this,

527
00:18:14,830 --> 00:18:16,664
but I don't care.

528
00:18:16,732 --> 00:18:18,666
I want to spend the rest
of my life with you,

529
00:18:18,734 --> 00:18:21,135
Jennifer Ruth Toyogi.

530
00:18:21,202 --> 00:18:23,804
- I know that now more than ever.
- Now that you slept with her.

531
00:18:23,872 --> 00:18:26,841
Happy to help.
Uh-huh.

532
00:18:26,908 --> 00:18:30,543
If... if you still love me,
at all...

533
00:18:30,611 --> 00:18:32,445
Of course I still do. I...

534
00:18:33,814 --> 00:18:35,548
Oh, yeah.

535
00:18:35,616 --> 00:18:36,683
Um...

536
00:18:38,252 --> 00:18:39,418
Ooh...

537
00:18:39,486 --> 00:18:41,054
Will you... will you...

538
00:18:41,122 --> 00:18:43,189
will you, will you marry him?

539
00:18:43,257 --> 00:18:45,490
Yeah.

540
00:18:51,131 --> 00:18:52,865
- Is that a "yes"?
- Yes.

541
00:19:07,093 --> 00:19:09,323
So you and Cece are staying
away from each other.

542
00:19:09,379 --> 00:19:10,779
Only until my penis
stops looking

543
00:19:10,846 --> 00:19:12,648
like a knotted wizard's staff.

544
00:19:12,715 --> 00:19:14,915
- That sounds tough, man.
- Guys like us--

545
00:19:14,983 --> 00:19:17,618
Nick, too--
we're warriors.

546
00:19:17,686 --> 00:19:19,853
We just keep on fighting,
and holding on,

547
00:19:19,921 --> 00:19:22,290
even when we know we're
just making a big mistake.

548
00:19:22,357 --> 00:19:23,791
Like Nick and Caroline.

549
00:19:23,858 --> 00:19:25,926
- And that earring.
- I'm not giving this thing up.

550
00:19:25,994 --> 00:19:27,495
You look like you were caught
by a fly fisherman.

551
00:19:27,562 --> 00:19:28,862
Dude, I've had it with
the earring jokes.

552
00:19:28,930 --> 00:19:30,363
You look like you should be
standing in line

553
00:19:30,431 --> 00:19:32,098
to get into Shaquille O'Neal's
birthday party.

554
00:19:32,166 --> 00:19:33,199
Oh, my God, you guys.

555
00:19:33,267 --> 00:19:35,234
The most exciting thing
just happened.

556
00:19:35,303 --> 00:19:38,104
I helped Paul propose to his
girlfriend. They are engaged.

557
00:19:38,172 --> 00:19:39,739
- Awesome. - I feel like you're
leaving out part of that story.

558
00:19:39,807 --> 00:19:42,041
Where's Nick?
I want to tell him.

559
00:19:42,109 --> 00:19:43,643
This should be fun. Um...

560
00:19:43,711 --> 00:19:45,345
yeah, Nick has something
to tell you, too.

561
00:19:45,413 --> 00:19:47,379
- He's in the bathroom.
- Oh, great.

562
00:19:48,648 --> 00:19:50,882
- Really?
- She's gonna find out anyway.

563
00:19:50,950 --> 00:19:52,884
Nick! Nick!

564
00:19:52,952 --> 00:19:54,553
- Hey.
- What, Jess?

565
00:19:55,121 --> 00:19:58,624
Um, Paul proposed to his
girlfriend in front of me.

566
00:19:59,442 --> 00:20:00,659
That sounds pretty awkward.

567
00:20:00,727 --> 00:20:02,860
She said yes, and it
was... it was really...

568
00:20:02,928 --> 00:20:04,228
it was really beautiful.

569
00:20:04,296 --> 00:20:06,364
And it made me
realize something.

570
00:20:06,432 --> 00:20:08,966
You're wrong. All the stuff
you said about Caroline,

571
00:20:09,034 --> 00:20:11,268
being about timing,

572
00:20:11,337 --> 00:20:13,838
and it just making sense?

573
00:20:14,655 --> 00:20:15,740
No.

574
00:20:15,808 --> 00:20:19,443
Because if you really
love someone, it's simple.

575
00:20:20,260 --> 00:20:22,346
Okay. Well, I understand
what you're saying, but...

576
00:20:22,413 --> 00:20:24,681
You deserve something amazing.

577
00:20:24,749 --> 00:20:27,083
And... you deserve love.

578
00:20:28,151 --> 00:20:29,653
I know you don't
want to be alone,

579
00:20:30,371 --> 00:20:31,921
but I'm going to be there,

580
00:20:31,989 --> 00:20:35,624
and I'll tell that Tom Waits
voice in your head to shut up.

581
00:20:37,794 --> 00:20:39,895
We don't have to settle...

582
00:20:39,963 --> 00:20:41,997
Nick.

583
00:20:42,065 --> 00:20:44,066
You're the best.

584
00:20:45,969 --> 00:20:47,369
I'm moving in with Caroline.

585
00:20:51,939 --> 00:20:53,574
We signed a lease this morning.

586
00:20:54,309 --> 00:20:56,544
Thanks for saying
all that stuff.

587
00:21:05,804 --> 00:21:07,539
Now that I got your attention,
Future Nick,

588
00:21:07,607 --> 00:21:11,074
there's a few things
I'd like to talk to you about.

589
00:21:11,192 --> 00:21:12,860
Be nicer to your mom
when she calls.

590
00:21:12,927 --> 00:21:14,528
Stop giving yourself high fives.

591
00:21:14,596 --> 00:21:16,630
Put your head underwater,
you two-year-old.

592
00:21:16,698 --> 00:21:19,065
Be nicer to Coach,
or he's gonna take off,

593
00:21:19,433 --> 00:21:21,001
live with a bunch
of other white people.

594
00:21:21,068 --> 00:21:22,202
I no fake karate.

595
00:21:22,270 --> 00:21:23,836
I'm Nick, I'm grumpy.

596
00:21:23,904 --> 00:21:25,337
I'm going to put
my baby hood on.

597
00:21:25,406 --> 00:21:27,407
Sex is a sprint,
not a marathon.

598
00:21:27,474 --> 00:21:29,341
# You are special,
you are special #

599
00:21:29,410 --> 00:21:31,477
# You... #

600
00:21:31,545 --> 00:21:33,579
We'll see each other
in the future...

601
00:21:33,647 --> 00:21:35,848
unless I see you first.
Nick Miller!

602
00:21:40,916 --> 00:21:42,050
Norther