1
00:00:00,888 --> 00:00:03,030
This is why I buy my food
from gas stations, Jess.
2
00:00:03,043 --> 00:00:06,596
Nick, you knocked over a
wheelbarrow full of fruit,
3
00:00:06,616 --> 00:00:08,009
and then you actually
skipped away.
4
00:00:08,029 --> 00:00:09,729
Guys, I'm trying to
concentrate, okay?
5
00:00:09,742 --> 00:00:13,202
The LAPD does not offer entrance
exams every single day.
6
00:00:13,259 --> 00:00:16,860
Just Mondays and Fridays. But
I am not waiting till Friday.
7
00:00:17,256 --> 00:00:19,416
- Hey, why do you have so
much fruit? - Because this one
8
00:00:19,436 --> 00:00:21,826
ran into his ex-girlfriend
at the farmer's market.
9
00:00:22,148 --> 00:00:23,248
Nick?
10
00:00:23,415 --> 00:00:25,626
Hey! No way!
11
00:00:26,077 --> 00:00:30,025
Caroline of my past. What
a pleasant surprise.
12
00:00:30,041 --> 00:00:32,067
My ex-lover... No!
13
00:00:32,978 --> 00:00:35,446
I don't deal with exes.
They're part of the past.
14
00:00:35,480 --> 00:00:39,247
You burn 'em swiftly and you
give their ashes to Poseidon.
15
00:00:39,272 --> 00:00:40,820
I'm really good
friends with Berkley,
16
00:00:40,840 --> 00:00:42,820
and we had a terrible
breakup... Come on, what?
17
00:00:42,847 --> 00:00:45,271
You have a good relationship with
him because he wants to bone you.
18
00:00:45,297 --> 00:00:49,355
He's a stay-at-home dad. His entire
life revolves around his family.
19
00:00:49,628 --> 00:00:51,501
He's the most emotionally
evolved person I know.
20
00:00:51,523 --> 00:00:55,806
And I'm sure his favorite emotion is
the emotion of wanting to bone you.
21
00:00:55,819 --> 00:00:56,799
That's not an emotion.
22
00:00:56,815 --> 00:01:00,488
Possible sex is the only reason people
stay "friends" with their exes.
23
00:01:00,501 --> 00:01:02,541
- Come on.
- Back me up, Winnie the Bish.
24
00:01:02,566 --> 00:01:04,733
Yeah, that's true. I mean,
I'm friends with all my exes...
25
00:01:04,742 --> 00:01:05,896
- See?
- ...families.
26
00:01:05,915 --> 00:01:09,162
- Ha-ha! See? - I still send
Shelby's dad a Father's Day card,
27
00:01:09,182 --> 00:01:11,255
and he still sends me five
bucks on my birthday.
28
00:01:11,282 --> 00:01:13,189
- What is wrong with you?
- That's nice. - Hey, guys.
29
00:01:13,225 --> 00:01:15,205
- I bet Coach is friends
with his exes. - No.
30
00:01:15,217 --> 00:01:16,990
- Oh, for sure, yeah.
- Yeah! I'm right!
31
00:01:17,020 --> 00:01:19,228
- For sex. - No!
- Ha-ha! I'm right!
32
00:01:19,258 --> 00:01:21,377
Can't spell "sex"
without the "ex."
33
00:01:21,399 --> 00:01:23,306
Man, is that sexy
when he does that.
34
00:01:25,057 --> 00:01:27,528
Announcement: I finally
finished my loft.
35
00:01:27,553 --> 00:01:28,842
Hold the applause.
36
00:01:30,729 --> 00:01:33,198
Let's go. All right. Come on.
37
00:01:34,887 --> 00:01:37,234
C-Come on, you guys.
All together, now.
38
00:01:37,629 --> 00:01:39,060
We're not... Who's coming?
39
00:01:39,091 --> 00:01:40,358
Let's go. Come on, Nick.
40
00:01:40,385 --> 00:01:43,765
- I don't want to go, man. Thanks for
the invite. - Nah, come on. Winnie.
41
00:01:45,424 --> 00:01:46,184
No?
42
00:01:46,938 --> 00:01:48,344
♪ Who's that girl?
43
00:01:48,360 --> 00:01:50,770
♪ Who's that girl? ♪
♪ It's Jess.
44
00:01:50,791 --> 00:01:55,291
Synced and corrected by backinblack
www.addic7ed.com
Resync for WEB-DL by Norther
45
00:01:55,869 --> 00:01:58,169
Jess: You and Caroline
still need some closure.
46
00:01:58,203 --> 00:01:59,830
Well, what do you
want me to say?
47
00:01:59,912 --> 00:02:02,261
That I walked out on her
and now I'm dating you?
48
00:02:02,293 --> 00:02:04,480
We started dating, like, a
year after you broke up.
49
00:02:04,499 --> 00:02:05,887
Yeah, but that doesn't
matter with her.
50
00:02:05,900 --> 00:02:08,680
She's got a crazy streak, and
this is bound to set her off.
51
00:02:08,700 --> 00:02:10,452
What if she hurts
me physically?
52
00:02:10,622 --> 00:02:12,155
What if she hurts
me with words?
53
00:02:12,168 --> 00:02:14,079
Just talk to her. Clear the air.
54
00:02:14,099 --> 00:02:16,152
You'll feel better,
she'll feel better.
55
00:02:16,165 --> 00:02:19,239
Besides, Nick, I can't give
up that farmer's market.
56
00:02:19,254 --> 00:02:21,089
Strolling around,
chatting with vendors...
57
00:02:21,117 --> 00:02:23,624
It's so nice. I feel
like Don Corleone.
58
00:02:23,632 --> 00:02:25,192
I think a lot of ladies do.
59
00:02:32,302 --> 00:02:33,635
(hoarse): Hey.
(clears throat)
60
00:02:34,357 --> 00:02:35,457
Hey...
61
00:02:35,551 --> 00:02:36,518
(coughs)
62
00:02:36,706 --> 00:02:37,878
(clears throat)
63
00:02:38,227 --> 00:02:39,394
Sorry about that.
64
00:02:39,422 --> 00:02:40,755
Haven't spoken
anybody all day.
65
00:02:40,783 --> 00:02:42,391
Phlegm buildup, you know?
66
00:02:43,471 --> 00:02:46,012
I've been cooped up all
day in my loft apartment.
67
00:02:46,025 --> 00:02:47,619
So much space for one
person, you know?
68
00:02:47,637 --> 00:02:50,172
You could scream in there,
nobody would ever hear you.
69
00:02:50,500 --> 00:02:52,033
I'm gonna go.
70
00:02:52,535 --> 00:02:53,928
Bye.
71
00:02:55,325 --> 00:02:56,525
What is going on?
72
00:02:56,545 --> 00:02:58,842
May I speak plainly
with you, Cecilia?
73
00:02:59,234 --> 00:02:59,898
(sighs)
74
00:02:59,918 --> 00:03:01,772
I'm in a bit of a
sexual drought.
75
00:03:01,797 --> 00:03:04,244
The Good Valley Schmidt
hasn't seen rain in months.
76
00:03:04,265 --> 00:03:06,732
You're just... you're
giving off a creepy vibe.
77
00:03:06,752 --> 00:03:10,152
All right? Living alone is messing up
your game and it's making you weird.
78
00:03:10,172 --> 00:03:11,939
Yeah, but I love
living alone.
79
00:03:12,155 --> 00:03:13,607
Where are you, grapes?
80
00:03:13,829 --> 00:03:15,243
Grápés.
81
00:03:15,611 --> 00:03:17,045
Great apes.
82
00:03:17,312 --> 00:03:18,953
Grapes, we have
you surrounded.
83
00:03:18,968 --> 00:03:20,801
Come out with your stems up!
84
00:03:21,090 --> 00:03:22,424
(sniffles)
85
00:03:23,733 --> 00:03:26,378
(sobbing loudly)
86
00:03:27,309 --> 00:03:29,985
I guess my game could be
upped if I increased my...
87
00:03:29,991 --> 00:03:32,204
- my human contact
a little bit. - Good.
88
00:03:32,221 --> 00:03:34,604
Because you're caressing
your own arm right now.
89
00:03:36,125 --> 00:03:37,978
- Hmm.
- That's not normal, man.
90
00:03:38,000 --> 00:03:39,900
I've been working out.
It feels... I don't...
91
00:03:41,691 --> 00:03:43,759
I just want to know
why you walked out.
92
00:03:45,100 --> 00:03:47,930
Was there something else going on?
Was there someone else?
93
00:03:48,450 --> 00:03:49,563
Can I just say,
94
00:03:49,593 --> 00:03:51,880
I really wish this
coffee was a giant beer.
95
00:03:51,908 --> 00:03:54,788
And I wish this scone was a-a
whiskey and I could just
96
00:03:54,810 --> 00:03:56,392
drink one... just chase 'em.
97
00:03:57,739 --> 00:03:59,219
This is nice.
98
00:03:59,361 --> 00:04:00,895
Glad we're doing this.
99
00:04:01,291 --> 00:04:02,251
So how'd it go?
100
00:04:02,264 --> 00:04:05,455
We gabbed like a couple of washer
women over the back fence.
101
00:04:05,595 --> 00:04:08,438
That's great. So
proud of you.
102
00:04:09,498 --> 00:04:10,232
(tires screech)
103
00:04:10,246 --> 00:04:11,746
You two are dating?
104
00:04:11,772 --> 00:04:14,071
I knew it. I knew it was her!
105
00:04:14,336 --> 00:04:15,336
What...?
106
00:04:15,350 --> 00:04:16,970
You didn't tell her
we were together?!
107
00:04:16,987 --> 00:04:18,637
I told her we were together.
108
00:04:19,014 --> 00:04:20,954
I'm not getting away with
this. I didn't tell her.
109
00:04:20,977 --> 00:04:22,495
Caroline:
Screw you, Miller!
110
00:04:25,416 --> 00:04:27,756
Hey, I don't understand. You
guys talked for 30 minutes.
111
00:04:27,769 --> 00:04:30,789
- How did our relationship not
come up? - 'Cause I got scared.
112
00:04:30,806 --> 00:04:32,406
There were so many things
that I wanted to tell her.
113
00:04:32,788 --> 00:04:35,661
You ever thought how weird it would
be if you just gave up your thumb?
114
00:04:36,044 --> 00:04:39,037
You just didn't have a thumb. I mean, how
would you give a thumbs up? Just like this?
115
00:04:39,050 --> 00:04:40,926
I think a guy died in the
building, 'cause one day
116
00:04:40,938 --> 00:04:43,125
in the Dumpster is a bunch
of clothes that just fit me.
117
00:04:43,145 --> 00:04:46,145
(with British accent): What I like to
do now is take the Underground, yeah?
118
00:04:46,168 --> 00:04:48,192
Spend my quid. Cheers?
119
00:04:49,531 --> 00:04:50,311
(phone chimes)
120
00:04:50,366 --> 00:04:51,833
Oh, crap. This is her.
121
00:04:52,178 --> 00:04:53,425
She thinks I cheated, Jess.
122
00:04:53,441 --> 00:04:55,081
You know who you
should talk to?
123
00:04:55,512 --> 00:04:56,466
Berkley.
124
00:04:56,492 --> 00:04:59,239
He's so good at this stuff...
friendship, closure.
125
00:04:59,271 --> 00:05:01,599
Actually, he did write a book
about it. It's an e-book.
126
00:05:01,618 --> 00:05:04,079
I gave it four stars, but it
kind of falls apart at the end.
127
00:05:04,106 --> 00:05:06,908
He goes into God in a way
I don't think he needs to.
128
00:05:06,976 --> 00:05:08,049
You know what?
I'm gonna text him?
129
00:05:08,062 --> 00:05:11,897
Why would I talk to your
ex-boyfriend about my ex-girlfriend?
130
00:05:11,923 --> 00:05:12,880
Well, you need his help.
131
00:05:12,901 --> 00:05:14,747
- You're right. Give me.
Can I see? - No, no, no.
132
00:05:14,770 --> 00:05:15,937
- Can I see?
- Yeah. Yeah.
133
00:05:15,958 --> 00:05:18,598
- "Hey, babe..." Don't call him "babe."
- It's just what we call each other.
134
00:05:18,604 --> 00:05:21,244
- "BF problems"?
- My boyfriend is having problems.
135
00:05:21,257 --> 00:05:23,532
- XOXO?
- It's a really common greeting.
136
00:05:23,559 --> 00:05:25,379
"Kissing you, hugging you,
kissing you, hugging you"?
137
00:05:25,398 --> 00:05:29,494
What else am I gonna write? "O-O-O"?
That just looks like "Oh..."
138
00:05:29,521 --> 00:05:30,969
You're leading him on, Jess.
139
00:05:30,985 --> 00:05:32,665
- Oh, Nick.
- You are.
140
00:05:32,681 --> 00:05:34,082
Berkley's really gonna
teach you a lot.
141
00:05:34,115 --> 00:05:36,455
Men don't talk to
people they've dated
142
00:05:36,471 --> 00:05:38,872
unless they want sex,
or they're Winston.
143
00:05:38,887 --> 00:05:40,720
- I also want sex.
- Going to Schmidt's.
144
00:05:40,749 --> 00:05:42,472
He's been begging
us to all week.
145
00:05:42,724 --> 00:05:44,444
Jess, men are sick.
146
00:05:44,464 --> 00:05:47,263
Look, I'm a relatively good
guy, but even I'm a sicko.
147
00:05:47,362 --> 00:05:49,209
Luckily, we have the Internet
as a community of...
148
00:05:49,235 --> 00:05:50,283
(phone chimes)
149
00:05:50,458 --> 00:05:51,785
Oh, this is terrible!
150
00:05:51,814 --> 00:05:55,427
She's quoting scriptures, but
using tons of cuss words.
151
00:05:55,457 --> 00:05:57,084
- This is as bad as it gets
with Caroline. - Okay.
152
00:05:57,118 --> 00:06:00,282
Berkley's around the corner at
his baby's world music class.
153
00:06:01,716 --> 00:06:03,829
Okay, you know
what? I'm in.
154
00:06:03,872 --> 00:06:05,512
- Great. - What kind of
beer does Berkley like?
155
00:06:05,526 --> 00:06:08,427
- He doesn't. - Oh, great.
I cannot wait to meet him.
156
00:06:10,698 --> 00:06:11,537
Fellas.
157
00:06:11,558 --> 00:06:14,442
You made it. As promised,
here's a coupon for a free sub.
158
00:06:14,468 --> 00:06:15,716
Yup.
(chuckles)
159
00:06:15,729 --> 00:06:17,271
Probably get ham.
160
00:06:17,299 --> 00:06:19,339
Wow, man. (laughs)
161
00:06:19,474 --> 00:06:21,334
- It's nice inside of here, man.
- Yeah.
162
00:06:21,369 --> 00:06:23,336
- It's like a European airport.
- Oh, what's that?
163
00:06:23,356 --> 00:06:24,703
Uh, you want to
watch the game?
164
00:06:24,720 --> 00:06:26,992
Which one? Basketball? Football?
165
00:06:27,314 --> 00:06:28,274
Of Thrones?
166
00:06:28,301 --> 00:06:30,114
Winston and Coach: Oh!
167
00:06:30,140 --> 00:06:31,341
Winston: That is awesome, man.
168
00:06:31,365 --> 00:06:34,192
Look at this place, Schmidt. You
got so many plush surfaces.
169
00:06:34,212 --> 00:06:36,172
Well, there are 15 different
bang spots in here,
170
00:06:36,210 --> 00:06:39,470
each one specifically designated
to its own sexual position.
171
00:06:39,490 --> 00:06:42,631
- Winston: Mm. - That's standing,
this is sitting, that's diagonal.
172
00:06:42,657 --> 00:06:45,117
- (laughs) That's how I do it.
- The "Why? Why? Because."
173
00:06:45,140 --> 00:06:46,713
The "Closure of the
Lincoln Tunnel."
174
00:06:46,732 --> 00:06:48,994
The "Red Beanbag Chair."
175
00:06:49,010 --> 00:06:50,917
Which is pretty obvious, but,
you know, that's a good one.
176
00:06:50,937 --> 00:06:52,170
The "Glass Menagerie."
177
00:06:52,200 --> 00:06:53,309
- The "Bike Share."
- Nice.
178
00:06:53,328 --> 00:06:55,435
- The "Backwards Oops."
- What is "backwards oops"?
179
00:06:55,457 --> 00:06:57,325
You don't want
to put it... mm.
180
00:06:57,452 --> 00:06:59,365
- You don't know what it means.
- I mean, I don't...
181
00:06:59,382 --> 00:07:02,726
I've done it, I've done it, but I didn't
know I was doing it. You know, it was...
182
00:07:03,124 --> 00:07:04,376
Super cool, dude.
183
00:07:04,396 --> 00:07:08,056
- I wish I had my own place.
- Guys, mi casa es su casa.
184
00:07:08,063 --> 00:07:09,488
- I even made you guys keys.
- What?
185
00:07:09,511 --> 00:07:11,391
Check these out.
That one's yours.
186
00:07:11,413 --> 00:07:13,940
- Aw, it looks like a guitar.
- Yeah, that's 'cause you're rocking.
187
00:07:13,953 --> 00:07:15,193
Mine's a...
188
00:07:15,237 --> 00:07:16,937
It's a rainbow
kissing a star.
189
00:07:16,958 --> 00:07:18,638
- You like it?
- Blah!
190
00:07:18,669 --> 00:07:21,336
- Yeah. - Guys, hang out
here anytime you want.
191
00:07:21,356 --> 00:07:22,743
- Even now. Who's thirsty?
- Thanks.
192
00:07:22,771 --> 00:07:23,691
- Right there.
- Dude!
193
00:07:23,719 --> 00:07:25,218
- Shut up!
- Damn, man.
194
00:07:25,237 --> 00:07:26,893
- You're like James Bond.
- (chuckles)
195
00:07:26,895 --> 00:07:28,862
But I'll be... I'll be
Moneypenny for sure.
196
00:07:28,896 --> 00:07:30,543
- Yeah. - Wait, which
one is Moneypenny?
197
00:07:30,562 --> 00:07:32,008
It's the woman.
198
00:07:32,313 --> 00:07:33,060
Oh.
199
00:07:33,128 --> 00:07:35,061
(whispering)
200
00:07:35,081 --> 00:07:38,108
So, did the store have that, uh,
bamboo highchair you were looking for?
201
00:07:38,120 --> 00:07:41,229
No, not the one I wanted. So
I think I'm just gonna...
202
00:07:41,248 --> 00:07:43,343
Both: Order it online.
203
00:07:43,384 --> 00:07:45,077
- (laughs)
- You still got it.
204
00:07:45,083 --> 00:07:45,996
You still got it.
205
00:07:46,022 --> 00:07:48,135
Big deal, I've been
online, too. I still got it.
206
00:07:48,323 --> 00:07:49,766
It's different.
(phone chimes)
207
00:07:50,558 --> 00:07:51,958
So, this is the problem.
208
00:07:51,971 --> 00:07:54,398
Nick didn't tell his ex
that we were together,
209
00:07:54,404 --> 00:07:57,093
and she found out, and now
she's really, really upset.
210
00:07:57,119 --> 00:07:58,648
This is the scariest one yet.
211
00:07:58,673 --> 00:08:00,186
It's just a bunch
of smiley faces.
212
00:08:00,202 --> 00:08:03,135
Okay, um, not to be
all guy with a baby,
213
00:08:03,158 --> 00:08:06,494
but, uh, exes are really
a lot like newborns, okay?
214
00:08:06,508 --> 00:08:08,601
The burps can be so yucky,
215
00:08:08,614 --> 00:08:10,281
but you know what
comes after a burp?
216
00:08:10,300 --> 00:08:11,341
What?
217
00:08:11,366 --> 00:08:12,826
A big old smile.
218
00:08:13,240 --> 00:08:14,547
Aw.
219
00:08:14,908 --> 00:08:16,682
What the hell are
you talking about?
220
00:08:16,695 --> 00:08:19,317
- It was a metaphor, Nick.
- It was a classic fatherhood metaphor.
221
00:08:19,330 --> 00:08:22,529
No, my-my point is you
just need to face her
222
00:08:22,542 --> 00:08:23,942
and let her get it
all off her chest.
223
00:08:23,978 --> 00:08:26,066
- Oh, I feel like I've done that.
- No, you didn't.
224
00:08:26,086 --> 00:08:29,028
You just talked and talked
about nothing for 30 minutes.
225
00:08:29,050 --> 00:08:31,663
Berkley: Okay, look, I know it's hard.
I know that, man.
226
00:08:31,680 --> 00:08:33,420
I'm here and I'm hearing it.
227
00:08:33,435 --> 00:08:36,882
I mean, when Jess and I did this, I
think we cried for, like... two days?
228
00:08:36,889 --> 00:08:38,548
I mean, at least. But look.
229
00:08:38,580 --> 00:08:41,694
Now I have such a good friend,
and we talk all the time,
230
00:08:41,726 --> 00:08:44,313
- and he's such a good listener.
- Say what? I can't hear you.
231
00:08:44,344 --> 00:08:46,812
(laughs)
232
00:08:47,055 --> 00:08:48,872
(laughs)
233
00:08:49,879 --> 00:08:51,159
Is this real?
234
00:08:51,186 --> 00:08:53,239
You guys saw each other naked,
and now you're friends?
235
00:08:53,261 --> 00:08:55,193
Yes, it's the purest
form of friendship.
236
00:08:55,213 --> 00:08:56,663
Straight Leno and Eubanks.
237
00:08:56,724 --> 00:08:58,024
(laughs)
238
00:08:59,374 --> 00:09:01,834
I just want to say
you're incredible,
239
00:09:01,850 --> 00:09:04,067
and I'm so lucky to
have you in my life.
240
00:09:06,441 --> 00:09:08,911
- Okay, I took your advice.
- What do we got?
241
00:09:10,505 --> 00:09:12,934
"My bad. Let's be
friends, 'kay?"
242
00:09:13,368 --> 00:09:15,462
Smooth, but tough.
243
00:09:15,482 --> 00:09:16,695
That's not good, Nick.
244
00:09:16,717 --> 00:09:18,764
Friendship is a, um...
245
00:09:18,793 --> 00:09:21,783
it's like a beautiful flower.
You have to nourish it, okay?
246
00:09:21,802 --> 00:09:23,475
- You can't just buy it
at a store. - All right.
247
00:09:23,501 --> 00:09:26,276
First of all, it was a draft,
okay, and I'll fix it.
248
00:09:26,294 --> 00:09:28,955
And second of all,
with all due respect,
249
00:09:28,975 --> 00:09:32,215
you can buy a
flower at a store.
250
00:09:32,240 --> 00:09:33,138
(laughs)
251
00:09:33,163 --> 00:09:34,411
Millered!
252
00:09:36,007 --> 00:09:38,147
Schmidt: I know as an angel
you usually sleep in heaven,
253
00:09:38,167 --> 00:09:40,914
but would you care to spend
the evening at my place?
254
00:09:40,941 --> 00:09:43,061
I think maybe I would.
255
00:09:43,087 --> 00:09:44,429
Fantastic choice.
256
00:09:45,619 --> 00:09:47,065
Here's my address.
257
00:09:47,694 --> 00:09:49,599
There's usually
no place to park.
258
00:09:50,784 --> 00:09:53,243
- Well, so where would I...?
- You're a big girl.
259
00:09:53,527 --> 00:09:55,045
You'll figure it out.
260
00:10:00,087 --> 00:10:01,936
Uh, just tr-try
south of Sixth.
261
00:10:01,962 --> 00:10:04,004
There's usually a string
of open spaces down there.
262
00:10:04,017 --> 00:10:07,011
And there's not a right turn
on red on Fifth, just FYI.
263
00:10:09,609 --> 00:10:12,730
Okay, here's the deal. I've been wanting
to end things with Claire for years now.
264
00:10:12,749 --> 00:10:14,429
And I'm gonna do it. It's
gonna take one phone call.
265
00:10:14,442 --> 00:10:16,182
- What? - She's gonna burn
all my clothes on the lawn.
266
00:10:16,201 --> 00:10:17,971
I don't care. I only want
to wear Henleys anyways.
267
00:10:17,991 --> 00:10:20,004
Jess, we can finally
be together.
268
00:10:20,031 --> 00:10:20,911
What?!
269
00:10:20,939 --> 00:10:23,199
Wait, no, but
leave your wife?!
270
00:10:23,222 --> 00:10:25,349
For you. I'm gonna
leave my wife for you.
271
00:10:25,383 --> 00:10:28,250
- Wait, what...?
- "Thank you for being so incredible."
272
00:10:28,272 --> 00:10:30,345
"So lucky to have
you in my life"?
273
00:10:30,365 --> 00:10:31,465
- Jess.
- Mm-mm.
274
00:10:31,494 --> 00:10:33,681
- When you said those
words, I knew. - No.
275
00:10:33,707 --> 00:10:36,641
Berkley, there's been a fundamental
misunderstanding here.
276
00:10:36,660 --> 00:10:39,152
You know the last time Claire
thanked me for anything?
277
00:10:39,178 --> 00:10:41,660
It was when I was pulling out
her chair at our wedding.
278
00:10:41,673 --> 00:10:43,873
- No... - She doesn't
appreciate me like you do.
279
00:10:43,892 --> 00:10:45,499
No, it's not happening.
No, no...
280
00:10:45,516 --> 00:10:48,336
Aah! Damn it, Winston!
Oh, God.
281
00:10:48,359 --> 00:10:50,766
Pretend this is attached, and
there's water coming out.
282
00:10:50,956 --> 00:10:52,162
Okay.
283
00:10:53,406 --> 00:10:54,760
No, not like that.
284
00:10:55,039 --> 00:10:56,147
(makes whooshing noise)
285
00:10:56,167 --> 00:10:57,427
It's not sexual!
286
00:10:57,455 --> 00:10:59,335
No! I'm not feeding
you water!
287
00:10:59,362 --> 00:11:00,454
- Wet my mouth.
- No!
288
00:11:01,713 --> 00:11:02,846
Oh, hi.
289
00:11:02,948 --> 00:11:04,482
- Are you Schmidt's friend?
- What?
290
00:11:04,515 --> 00:11:05,942
Sch-Schmidt's friend?
291
00:11:05,962 --> 00:11:09,081
Where you at? 'Cause
I'm ready to ea...
292
00:11:09,306 --> 00:11:10,267
Hey!
293
00:11:10,287 --> 00:11:12,537
My good friend... Frank...
294
00:11:12,990 --> 00:11:14,717
Scabopolis!
295
00:11:14,743 --> 00:11:16,578
Ah, give me a hug, you
Greek son of a bitch!
296
00:11:16,595 --> 00:11:17,889
- Come here!
- What?
297
00:11:20,659 --> 00:11:23,761
- Where is this coming from?
- You. The phone calls, the texts,
298
00:11:23,782 --> 00:11:26,469
"Boyfriend problems," "I
need you," hugs, kisses.
299
00:11:26,482 --> 00:11:27,976
- What?
- More hugs, more kisses.
300
00:11:27,998 --> 00:11:31,220
- I... - You have been setting
up dominoes for ten years.
301
00:11:31,240 --> 00:11:33,458
- And now they are falling.
- You have a baby, sir!
302
00:11:33,483 --> 00:11:35,879
I know. And you are gonna
make such a good stepmom.
303
00:11:35,898 --> 00:11:37,699
I love you, Jessica.
304
00:11:37,712 --> 00:11:40,632
God, it feels good to say that out
loud and not just to my sleeping wife.
305
00:11:40,653 --> 00:11:41,873
Nick: (groans)
306
00:11:42,144 --> 00:11:44,203
- Guys, I need your help.
- You, hey!
307
00:11:44,295 --> 00:11:46,142
Nick was right about you,
and he can't know that,
308
00:11:46,167 --> 00:11:48,416
- so put a sock in it!
- What is wrong with me?
309
00:11:48,439 --> 00:11:50,546
- Hi. - Hey.
- I keep trying to write to Caroline,
310
00:11:50,569 --> 00:11:53,356
but I'm choking. I can't
get past "What's up, C?"
311
00:11:53,392 --> 00:11:54,239
(phone chimes)
312
00:11:54,264 --> 00:11:57,149
Oh, that's her. It says, "Come
to the window, friend." Friend.
313
00:11:57,167 --> 00:11:59,641
- That's good. That's good.
- That's a good thing. Yeah.
314
00:12:00,317 --> 00:12:01,911
Caroline! Hey!
315
00:12:01,940 --> 00:12:05,141
You cheat on me and then
you want to be friends?!
316
00:12:05,156 --> 00:12:07,076
I'm just writing
you an e-mail!
317
00:12:07,089 --> 00:12:08,529
It's-it's not sending!
318
00:12:08,553 --> 00:12:11,060
Look, gonna throw it down,
but I need my phone back!
319
00:12:11,075 --> 00:12:13,195
- We talk now!
- Caroline! Hey!
320
00:12:13,208 --> 00:12:14,222
(car alarm wailing)
321
00:12:14,252 --> 00:12:16,239
- Stop!
- Really excited to...
322
00:12:16,280 --> 00:12:17,674
- No!
- ...talk to you guys.
323
00:12:17,701 --> 00:12:19,295
Hey, stop! That's not my car!
324
00:12:19,308 --> 00:12:21,222
Tell Jess I said hi.
325
00:12:22,553 --> 00:12:25,146
No, Caroline, I parked
down the street!
326
00:12:25,159 --> 00:12:27,301
It... Why am I telling you?!
327
00:12:30,763 --> 00:12:32,944
At least she can't get
into the building.
328
00:12:33,365 --> 00:12:35,102
Okay, what am I
gonna do here?
329
00:12:35,129 --> 00:12:36,355
She cut off the power.
330
00:12:36,368 --> 00:12:38,088
No, Nick, that was you.
You turned off the light.
331
00:12:38,106 --> 00:12:39,714
All the other lights
are still on.
332
00:12:39,740 --> 00:12:41,120
My bad. Thank you.
333
00:12:41,822 --> 00:12:43,329
(quietly): I know you're scared.
Let me be brave.
334
00:12:43,360 --> 00:12:45,113
You should go because
you have a wife,
335
00:12:45,134 --> 00:12:47,107
and you have a baby,
and you love them.
336
00:12:47,114 --> 00:12:49,295
Jess, what are you, crazy?
337
00:12:49,315 --> 00:12:51,442
It's not safe out there. Berkley
can't go. He stays here.
338
00:12:51,455 --> 00:12:53,915
- I don't think that... - Thank you, Nick.
- You're very welcome.
339
00:12:54,407 --> 00:12:56,520
I'll be with you in just
one second, all right?
340
00:12:56,533 --> 00:12:58,351
- Mm-hmm. - And don't drink
the water by the bed.
341
00:12:58,358 --> 00:13:00,080
It's got my contacts in it.
342
00:13:00,112 --> 00:13:01,661
(laughs)
343
00:13:02,929 --> 00:13:04,696
- What are you doing?
- What are you doing?
344
00:13:04,834 --> 00:13:07,501
And t-tell her that I'd like to be
reimbursed for those strawberries.
345
00:13:07,520 --> 00:13:09,260
- What...? Dude.
- Why is she calling you Schmidt?
346
00:13:09,279 --> 00:13:11,176
I told her my name was Schmidt
in case we saw your mail.
347
00:13:11,189 --> 00:13:14,658
I don't just leave mail out. This
isn't a small business. Get out.
348
00:13:14,678 --> 00:13:16,811
Dude, I'm about to seal
the deal. I'm not getting out.
349
00:13:16,829 --> 00:13:18,762
I'm about to...
I'm-I'm a deal sealer.
350
00:13:18,775 --> 00:13:20,410
I'm about to get
some squish, dude,
351
00:13:20,435 --> 00:13:22,875
- and you need to not get in between that.
- I'm about to nail it into the wall.
352
00:13:22,895 --> 00:13:25,448
Dude, I'm about to take
down that va-dragon.
353
00:13:25,479 --> 00:13:28,735
I'm about to pin the tail
on the va-donkey, dude.
354
00:13:28,754 --> 00:13:30,055
You better not stand
in the way of this.
355
00:13:30,083 --> 00:13:32,174
Don't call her a va-donkey.
I don't even know her well
356
00:13:32,181 --> 00:13:33,805
and I want her to leave,
but please don't call her
357
00:13:33,814 --> 00:13:35,979
- a va-d... va-donkey.
- I won't. All right. Please.
358
00:13:36,461 --> 00:13:37,680
I need this.
359
00:13:38,251 --> 00:13:40,704
Okay, fine. I will
use the guest room.
360
00:13:40,707 --> 00:13:42,787
- Yes.
- Like an animal.
361
00:13:43,997 --> 00:13:45,010
Oh, yes.
362
00:13:45,539 --> 00:13:47,306
Oh! Winston! What
are you doing?!
363
00:13:47,325 --> 00:13:48,893
Oh, we were just playing a game.
364
00:13:48,909 --> 00:13:50,997
You know, Bad Cop, Black Cop?
365
00:13:51,325 --> 00:13:52,558
It's me, Bertie!
366
00:13:52,600 --> 00:13:54,274
(groans)
(elevator bell dings)
367
00:13:59,533 --> 00:14:02,260
Um, I might have been
wrong about some things,
368
00:14:02,289 --> 00:14:04,196
um, some Berkley things.
369
00:14:04,209 --> 00:14:05,242
Hey, the screaming stopped.
370
00:14:05,270 --> 00:14:07,070
I knew she'd run out of gas.
(pounding on door)
371
00:14:07,092 --> 00:14:08,059
- "My bad"?!
- What?
372
00:14:08,081 --> 00:14:09,741
"Let's be friends, 'kay"?!
373
00:14:09,927 --> 00:14:12,034
You couldn't even
write out "okay"?!
374
00:14:12,054 --> 00:14:14,474
It's go time, Nick. Time to
break out that burp cloth.
375
00:14:14,875 --> 00:14:16,411
Jess, let's give
him some space...
376
00:14:16,444 --> 00:14:19,097
- (whispers): by going to a motel.
- I don't love you.
377
00:14:19,847 --> 00:14:21,914
- I got a slight beer buzz.
Let's do it. - Yeah, don't go.
378
00:14:21,934 --> 00:14:24,114
- I thought you wanted me to
talk to her. - Don't go right now.
379
00:14:24,133 --> 00:14:26,472
I'm sorry. You don't love me?
380
00:14:26,498 --> 00:14:29,141
- Say it again?
- I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
381
00:14:29,167 --> 00:14:32,533
- Oh... What?! - Then why have
you led me on for ten years?
382
00:14:32,555 --> 00:14:34,219
Oh, hell on Earth no!
383
00:14:34,239 --> 00:14:36,386
Oh, my God, I was right.
384
00:14:36,404 --> 00:14:39,076
- He wants to bone you.
- Oh, come on, Nick!
385
00:14:39,506 --> 00:14:40,879
Nick: Caroline, I'll
be right there.
386
00:14:40,902 --> 00:14:42,755
I'm so sorry, Berkley.
You got cut off.
387
00:14:42,791 --> 00:14:43,824
- Thank you, sir.
- No.
388
00:14:43,844 --> 00:14:45,486
Berkley: May, 2004.
389
00:14:45,501 --> 00:14:48,248
You brushed my hand at
Dave Matthews concert
390
00:14:48,277 --> 00:14:50,077
- during "Two Step."
- "Two Step"?
391
00:14:50,099 --> 00:14:52,496
- Oh, my God. - Or that time
that I helped you move,
392
00:14:52,515 --> 00:14:54,222
and I came over, I was
wearing sweatpants.
393
00:14:54,248 --> 00:14:55,977
You couldn't stop
staring at my rig.
394
00:14:55,998 --> 00:14:58,818
- She loves looking at rigs.
- Why are you calling it a rig?!
395
00:14:58,831 --> 00:15:01,151
- You're doing it again.
- One second, Caroline!
396
00:15:01,155 --> 00:15:02,742
Open this door!
397
00:15:07,557 --> 00:15:09,523
You think I wear this
sweater because I like it?
398
00:15:09,542 --> 00:15:10,648
It's a handsome sweater.
399
00:15:10,679 --> 00:15:12,673
- That's right, I love you.
- No!
400
00:15:12,701 --> 00:15:14,457
- Berkley: What do you mean, no?
- Ooh!
401
00:15:15,196 --> 00:15:17,464
Open the door!
Come on!
402
00:15:17,697 --> 00:15:18,644
Schmidt?
403
00:15:18,672 --> 00:15:20,552
You said to me that
I was incredible
404
00:15:20,558 --> 00:15:22,486
and you were so lucky,
and now here we are,
405
00:15:22,505 --> 00:15:24,413
we're trying to hook up
Nick with his ex-girlfriend.
406
00:15:24,430 --> 00:15:26,656
- I mean, that's what this is, right?
- No, it isn't. That's not what...
407
00:15:26,667 --> 00:15:28,054
So let's just do it, come on.
408
00:15:28,074 --> 00:15:29,568
- Hey, hey,
- Berkley, Berkley!
409
00:15:29,608 --> 00:15:30,629
- Oh, no!
- No, no!
410
00:15:30,658 --> 00:15:32,618
- No, what are you doing?
- Oh, no.
411
00:15:32,687 --> 00:15:34,540
- 'Kay!
- Oh, hey!
412
00:15:34,561 --> 00:15:37,063
- Car-o-line.
- Yeah...
413
00:15:37,897 --> 00:15:40,080
You stole my boyfriend.
414
00:15:44,478 --> 00:15:45,858
Schmidt?
415
00:15:45,891 --> 00:15:47,222
Be right there!
416
00:15:47,354 --> 00:15:49,501
That should buy us some time.
Coach, you stay with your girl
417
00:15:49,523 --> 00:15:51,576
who thinks that you're
me in my bedroom.
418
00:15:51,601 --> 00:15:53,369
Winston, you stay in the
guest room with Bertie doing
419
00:15:53,393 --> 00:15:54,973
whatever the hell it
is you guys are doing.
420
00:15:54,986 --> 00:15:56,345
- Gross.
- I'm gonna keep Sarah...
421
00:15:56,358 --> 00:15:57,931
(knocking)
Almost there!
422
00:15:57,958 --> 00:15:59,399
I'm gonna keep Sarah
in the living room,
423
00:15:59,412 --> 00:16:02,410
using one of the living-dining-
open-floor-plan bang spots.
424
00:16:02,423 --> 00:16:05,861
Now, no exits, no entrances,
no Noises Off baloney.
425
00:16:05,893 --> 00:16:07,026
Capeesh?
426
00:16:07,047 --> 00:16:08,026
Confirm my capeesh!
427
00:16:08,041 --> 00:16:09,148
- Capeesh!
- (mutters gibberish)
428
00:16:09,169 --> 00:16:10,882
- Let's go. Do it.
- All right.
429
00:16:10,905 --> 00:16:12,845
- Guys, guys!
- Right.
430
00:16:12,886 --> 00:16:14,713
This is the exact type of
baloney that I'm talking about.
431
00:16:14,728 --> 00:16:17,259
Unbelievable. Guys, guys!
432
00:16:17,831 --> 00:16:19,549
I'm really glad that
we're doing this.
433
00:16:19,713 --> 00:16:20,908
- Okay.
- All right.
434
00:16:21,408 --> 00:16:23,208
I did not steal
your boyfriend.
435
00:16:23,230 --> 00:16:24,641
Timeline. Now.
436
00:16:24,674 --> 00:16:26,141
Okay, um...
437
00:16:26,433 --> 00:16:27,906
you and Nick break up.
438
00:16:27,908 --> 00:16:29,442
London has a great Olympics.
439
00:16:29,476 --> 00:16:31,006
Uh-oh, trouble in Syria.
440
00:16:31,025 --> 00:16:33,852
Board up your windows.
Superstorm Sandy.
441
00:16:35,192 --> 00:16:37,552
Hey, over here. Me and
Nick get together.
442
00:16:37,571 --> 00:16:40,217
And here's that beautiful Sunday in
the park that you and I went to,
443
00:16:40,235 --> 00:16:41,648
- and we have a wonderful Sunday.
- Shut up, Berkley!
444
00:16:41,680 --> 00:16:44,033
- No, you shut up, Jess.
- Don't take this out on Jess.
445
00:16:44,049 --> 00:16:47,024
Oh, oh, right, it's the beginning,
so you're being all supportive now.
446
00:16:47,044 --> 00:16:49,968
He's still trying. I mean, I bet he's
still laughing at all your jokes, right?
447
00:16:49,996 --> 00:16:51,055
Well...
448
00:16:51,079 --> 00:16:52,900
I have a great
instinct for comedy.
449
00:16:52,907 --> 00:16:55,563
All right, well, you know what, you
enjoy all that while it lasts,
450
00:16:55,590 --> 00:16:57,456
because I'll tell you what.
451
00:16:57,478 --> 00:17:00,318
It's not gonna be
long before he stops
452
00:17:00,327 --> 00:17:02,628
holding your hand and
starts high-fiving you
453
00:17:02,649 --> 00:17:05,177
and he stops letting you be the
little spoon and he starts
454
00:17:05,197 --> 00:17:07,985
drifting off during
important conversations.
455
00:17:08,007 --> 00:17:09,770
Are you listening right now?
456
00:17:11,122 --> 00:17:11,857
What's that?
457
00:17:11,885 --> 00:17:14,432
- Seriously, Nick?
- Jess, you're the girlfriend now,
458
00:17:14,860 --> 00:17:16,582
but one day you're
gonna be the ex.
459
00:17:17,189 --> 00:17:20,587
And two years after he breaks up with
you, he still won't tell you why.
460
00:17:22,996 --> 00:17:24,958
Um, okay, well, um...
461
00:17:24,971 --> 00:17:28,470
this has been a really,
um, neat talk, so, um...
462
00:17:29,394 --> 00:17:33,474
I'm gonna go... sit
in the shower,
463
00:17:33,487 --> 00:17:35,947
and, um, go over the
greatest hits in my mind.
464
00:17:35,974 --> 00:17:38,624
Berkley: I'll just be right here,
picturing the whole sudsy thing.
465
00:17:38,650 --> 00:17:40,757
Hey, hey, ho, I'm right here.
How about a little respect?
466
00:17:40,779 --> 00:17:43,219
I know. What, you... This
is obviously happening.
467
00:17:43,228 --> 00:17:45,561
- Jess: No, it's not!
- Where's your brain?
468
00:17:48,095 --> 00:17:49,890
Hey, Jess, you okay?
469
00:17:53,266 --> 00:17:54,790
(voice breaking): No.
470
00:17:55,634 --> 00:17:58,494
This is the worst thing
that's ever happened to me.
471
00:17:58,817 --> 00:18:01,405
(sobs): I've led a
very fortunate life.
472
00:18:01,431 --> 00:18:04,134
- Look, Jess, you were right.
- No, you were right.
473
00:18:04,194 --> 00:18:05,935
I feel like such a fool.
474
00:18:06,703 --> 00:18:08,076
You were right
about everything.
475
00:18:08,106 --> 00:18:09,540
No, I wasn't.
476
00:18:09,780 --> 00:18:12,357
Caroline deserves
to know why I left.
477
00:18:13,463 --> 00:18:15,039
And you should hear, too.
478
00:18:18,853 --> 00:18:22,240
- I said I'm thirsty! Stop! Let me go, boy!
- No, no, no, come, come...
479
00:18:22,261 --> 00:18:23,458
Whoa!
480
00:18:23,608 --> 00:18:24,808
Who the hell are you?
481
00:18:24,830 --> 00:18:26,528
Who the hell are you?
482
00:18:26,924 --> 00:18:28,117
- Schmidt.
- What?
483
00:18:28,153 --> 00:18:31,178
Frank Scabopolis is up in here
making out with some bitch.
484
00:18:31,198 --> 00:18:34,005
- Schmidt: That's not necessary. I mean...
- Who's Frank Scabopolis?
485
00:18:34,022 --> 00:18:36,116
- Aren't you Schmidt?!
- I-I am Schmidt.
486
00:18:36,137 --> 00:18:38,288
- I thought you were Schmidt.
- I am Schmidt.
487
00:18:38,307 --> 00:18:40,631
Uh... Uh, w-we're brothers.
488
00:18:40,647 --> 00:18:42,454
We are, we're-we're brothers.
What an upbringing that was.
489
00:18:42,467 --> 00:18:44,040
Yeah, same mom,
different dads.
490
00:18:44,078 --> 00:18:45,131
One browner.
491
00:18:45,315 --> 00:18:46,009
(sighs)
492
00:18:46,020 --> 00:18:49,326
Then who the hell is
Frank Scabopolis?
493
00:18:49,343 --> 00:18:50,423
Yeah.
(door opens)
494
00:18:50,451 --> 00:18:52,999
I am Frank Scabopolis!
495
00:18:53,767 --> 00:18:54,795
(sighs)
496
00:18:55,161 --> 00:18:57,181
Is this helping, Schmidt?
I forgot the plan.
497
00:18:57,194 --> 00:18:59,686
- Winston, please shut up.
- Plan? What plan?!
498
00:18:59,713 --> 00:19:01,706
I... there's no plan. I
know nothing about a plan.
499
00:19:01,722 --> 00:19:05,912
Is this some little nasty group sex
games y'all got going on up in here?
500
00:19:05,918 --> 00:19:07,679
Been a couple years, but...
501
00:19:07,704 --> 00:19:08,937
- I'm down.
- (groans)
502
00:19:08,956 --> 00:19:11,436
- I didn't want to know that.
- I am out of here.
503
00:19:11,465 --> 00:19:13,519
- I'm way ahead of you.
- No, no, please!
504
00:19:13,534 --> 00:19:15,847
Sarah, please, wait!
I can... ugh.
505
00:19:15,930 --> 00:19:16,714
(sighs)
506
00:19:16,739 --> 00:19:17,719
Just...
507
00:19:18,018 --> 00:19:20,058
(clears throat) Well,
I'm gonna go back to bed.
508
00:19:20,088 --> 00:19:23,313
Schmidt, that
mattress is heaven.
509
00:19:23,350 --> 00:19:24,728
It's pretty good.
510
00:19:25,773 --> 00:19:27,074
See?
511
00:19:27,087 --> 00:19:29,973
You don't think I'm
scary, do you, baby?
512
00:19:29,983 --> 00:19:31,070
- Oh, whoa!
- Oh!
513
00:19:31,099 --> 00:19:32,065
- No. Hey, no.
- (laughs)
514
00:19:32,093 --> 00:19:33,253
- I was just kidding.
- No.
515
00:19:33,266 --> 00:19:35,079
Hey, Caroline, there's
something I need to say.
516
00:19:35,088 --> 00:19:37,429
- Nick, you don't have to do this.
- Nick: No, I-I do.
517
00:19:37,644 --> 00:19:40,880
Look, I never cheated on you,
but I might as well have.
518
00:19:42,061 --> 00:19:44,986
See, I fell in love with Jess the
moment she walked through the door.
519
00:19:45,813 --> 00:19:47,941
- Boo!
- Really?
520
00:19:48,615 --> 00:19:49,896
Sorry.
521
00:19:50,330 --> 00:19:52,283
The moment I walked
through the door?
522
00:19:52,325 --> 00:19:53,458
Really?
523
00:19:54,733 --> 00:19:56,243
'Cause I thought
I annoyed you.
524
00:19:56,264 --> 00:19:59,219
- Can we do this later, please? It's just
not a good... - Yeah, okay. Got it, yup.
525
00:19:59,268 --> 00:20:01,638
Caroline, she's the
reason that I left.
526
00:20:03,197 --> 00:20:05,052
I always thought
that it was Jess.
527
00:20:06,627 --> 00:20:08,271
I'm glad I'm not crazy.
528
00:20:08,622 --> 00:20:10,246
- Well...
- Hmm.
529
00:20:10,638 --> 00:20:12,145
Thanks for telling
me the truth.
530
00:20:12,165 --> 00:20:13,712
Oh, I'm just sorry it
didn't happen sooner.
531
00:20:13,727 --> 00:20:15,495
- Don't touch me.
- I'm so sorry.
532
00:20:15,715 --> 00:20:18,462
- I was kidding. - There's that
famous Milwaukee humor.
533
00:20:18,485 --> 00:20:21,281
- I'm not from Milwaukee.
- You honestly scare me.
534
00:20:21,529 --> 00:20:23,309
- Good-bye, Nick.
- Bye.
535
00:20:24,124 --> 00:20:25,172
Jess: Hey.
536
00:20:25,218 --> 00:20:26,838
Look, Berkley, um,
537
00:20:26,860 --> 00:20:29,803
I'm so sorry that you got
the wrong idea about us.
538
00:20:30,958 --> 00:20:32,415
You were right.
539
00:20:32,693 --> 00:20:34,865
I did play some part in it.
540
00:20:35,076 --> 00:20:36,257
Thank you.
541
00:20:37,543 --> 00:20:39,443
- Good luck, Jessica.
- Thanks.
542
00:20:40,017 --> 00:20:41,250
See you later, bud.
543
00:20:41,256 --> 00:20:42,386
(sighs)
544
00:20:43,000 --> 00:20:45,150
I really don't want to go back to
my wife. Do you guys want to play
545
00:20:45,166 --> 00:20:47,722
- cards or something...
- Go. Just go. - Get out of here.
546
00:20:50,341 --> 00:20:51,484
(door closes)
547
00:20:54,492 --> 00:20:56,052
The moment I walked
through that door, huh?
548
00:20:56,073 --> 00:20:57,193
Just be cool about it.
549
00:20:57,220 --> 00:20:59,760
'Cause for me, it
was way later.
550
00:20:59,784 --> 00:21:01,284
- Yeah, I know.
- Like, a lot later...
551
00:21:01,305 --> 00:21:03,036
Oh, come here already.
552
00:21:04,162 --> 00:21:05,195
You could use that
for something.
553
00:21:05,230 --> 00:21:06,736
- That's the "Glass Menagerie."
- Yeah.
554
00:21:06,748 --> 00:21:09,128
- I'll sit her down right on top of that.
- Oh, absolutely.
555
00:21:09,154 --> 00:21:11,515
- The, uh, "Star 68."
- Where's that at?
556
00:21:11,543 --> 00:21:13,270
- Right there on that pillow.
- Oh.
557
00:21:13,305 --> 00:21:14,632
- Wow.
- The "Jumanji."
558
00:21:14,651 --> 00:21:16,739
Yeah, you do the...
the "U Lock" on here.
559
00:21:16,760 --> 00:21:19,153
- That'd be cool. - (chuckles)
- The "Jean-Michel Basquiat."
560
00:21:19,171 --> 00:21:21,039
- Oh, okay.
- The "Fabric Softener."
561
00:21:21,055 --> 00:21:22,822
That's the "Kansas
City Shaker."
562
00:21:22,843 --> 00:21:24,536
- This, right here? I like that.
- Yeah.
563
00:21:24,565 --> 00:21:26,033
Back there, that's
the "Nia Vardalos."
564
00:21:26,054 --> 00:21:28,534
- Ooh. That's nice, dude.
- Nice.
565
00:21:28,547 --> 00:21:30,818
That one's "Sex on the Rug,"
566
00:21:31,476 --> 00:21:33,363
which is... and, again,
it's pretty obvious.
567
00:21:33,383 --> 00:21:35,684
But that's... you know,
why mess with a classic?
568
00:21:35,728 --> 00:21:41,728
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