1
00:00:01,881 --> 00:00:04,016
Hey, hey, hey.
Scoot down, scoot down.
2
00:00:04,018 --> 00:00:06,485
Nick, what are
you doing?
- What are you doing?
3
00:00:06,487 --> 00:00:08,187
Sorry, just scoot down.
I need to iron this shirt
4
00:00:08,189 --> 00:00:10,022
that I'm wearing for my date
with Tran's granddaughter.
5
00:00:10,024 --> 00:00:12,191
It's either this
or the turtleneck
6
00:00:12,193 --> 00:00:13,392
my mother bought me in 2009.
7
00:00:13,394 --> 00:00:14,860
They're my only clean shirts.
8
00:00:14,862 --> 00:00:16,528
The short-sleeved turtleneck?
Don't do that.
9
00:00:16,530 --> 00:00:18,130
Okay, look, we need
this whole table
10
00:00:18,132 --> 00:00:20,632
for Nadia's baby shower,
all right? So, move along.
11
00:00:20,634 --> 00:00:22,701
Nadia-- isn't that
the Russian chick who broke, uh,
12
00:00:22,703 --> 00:00:23,635
Schmidt's, uh...
13
00:00:23,637 --> 00:00:24,670
SCHMIDT:
Will to live?
14
00:00:24,672 --> 00:00:26,338
After she broke my penis?
15
00:00:26,340 --> 00:00:27,906
(chuckles)
16
00:00:27,908 --> 00:00:29,641
Who saw her and thought,
17
00:00:29,643 --> 00:00:32,244
"That's the woman I want to be
the mother of my children"?
18
00:00:32,246 --> 00:00:35,481
She's not sure.
- Yeah, she calls it
her little "sex party miracle."
19
00:00:35,483 --> 00:00:37,149
Do you have to iron here?
20
00:00:37,151 --> 00:00:38,650
It's the only flat surface!
21
00:00:38,652 --> 00:00:40,386
Besides Winston's desk--
but he's using it
22
00:00:40,388 --> 00:00:42,388
to study for his
police academy test,
23
00:00:42,390 --> 00:00:44,490
and he is "not to be disturbed."
24
00:00:51,931 --> 00:00:54,099
Not enough, not enough.
25
00:00:54,101 --> 00:00:56,101
There's an ironing board
in the bathroom.
26
00:00:56,103 --> 00:00:59,204
I know, but I've been using that
to wedge it between two urinals
27
00:00:59,206 --> 00:01:00,873
to keep Schmidt from peeking.
28
00:01:00,875 --> 00:01:02,441
But fine, I'll use that!
29
00:01:02,443 --> 00:01:04,676
Coach! Coach!
30
00:01:04,678 --> 00:01:07,913
My Charlie Rose episodes,
all 18 of them, are gone.
31
00:01:07,915 --> 00:01:09,114
DVR is chockablock
filled with
32
00:01:09,116 --> 00:01:11,283
American football
matches, which,
33
00:01:11,285 --> 00:01:13,018
by the way, is
a garbage... Oh!
34
00:01:14,521 --> 00:01:16,121
We cool?
- (exhales)
35
00:01:16,123 --> 00:01:18,424
Yeah, we cool.
- Cool.
36
00:01:18,426 --> 00:01:19,691
What the hell just happened?
37
00:01:19,693 --> 00:01:21,026
Fight.
- Yeah. Now it's over.
38
00:01:21,028 --> 00:01:22,594
I barely even
remember it.
39
00:01:22,596 --> 00:01:24,763
I cannot believe you guys
handle things that way.
40
00:01:24,765 --> 00:01:27,466
I'm starting to think
that neither one of you read
41
00:01:27,468 --> 00:01:30,035
the Madeleine Albright biography
I gave you for Christmas.
42
00:01:30,037 --> 00:01:32,371
(chuckles) I'm so glad
we don't fight.
43
00:01:32,373 --> 00:01:34,373
I know.
- Oh, please. Women fight.
44
00:01:34,375 --> 00:01:36,308
Well, we occasionally
get into a little thing.
45
00:01:36,310 --> 00:01:38,444
Yeah, I mean, like we just had
that thing with the purse--
46
00:01:38,446 --> 00:01:40,479
but that was, like,
barely even a thing.
- Yeah.
47
00:01:40,481 --> 00:01:42,948
That was nothing--
I mean, there's no point
in even talking about it.
48
00:01:42,950 --> 00:01:44,583
Oh.
- (gasps) Oh.
49
00:01:44,585 --> 00:01:46,585
Oh.
- No, you should
have that.
50
00:01:46,587 --> 00:01:48,587
No, you should have it.
No, you take it.
51
00:01:48,589 --> 00:01:49,822
No, you take it.
No, you take it.
52
00:01:49,824 --> 00:01:51,824
I want you to take it.
No. Take it.
53
00:01:51,826 --> 00:01:53,258
Look, I want you to have it
54
00:01:53,260 --> 00:01:54,660
'cause it would look good
on you.
55
00:01:54,662 --> 00:01:56,462
No, it's made for you.
You... No.
56
00:01:57,831 --> 00:02:00,499
But then we both decided
that it was better
57
00:02:00,501 --> 00:02:02,234
if neither one
of us bought it.
58
00:02:02,236 --> 00:02:04,069
Yep.
- The neon yellow purse?
59
00:02:04,071 --> 00:02:05,737
With the strap?
Yeah, I've seen that.
60
00:02:05,739 --> 00:02:07,039
It's in your closet.
61
00:02:08,074 --> 00:02:09,107
I wonder how many
rubber duckies
62
00:02:09,109 --> 00:02:11,143
needed to die
to make that thing.
63
00:02:11,145 --> 00:02:12,611
Uh, Schmidt, you don't know
what you're talking about.
64
00:02:12,613 --> 00:02:14,279
I got to run.
65
00:02:14,281 --> 00:02:15,948
Oh...
- What?
66
00:02:15,950 --> 00:02:17,749
Thank you so much for helping
with the baby shower.
67
00:02:17,751 --> 00:02:19,585
You know, you are just the best.
No, you're the best.
68
00:02:19,587 --> 00:02:21,954
Whoa.
- Did I tell you I love
your top, by the way?
69
00:02:21,956 --> 00:02:23,856
No. Oh, I just found this
in the back of my closet.
What's... what's happening?
70
00:02:23,858 --> 00:02:25,357
(whispers):
You said too much.
71
00:02:25,359 --> 00:02:26,959
So, I'll call you later?
Definitely.
72
00:02:26,961 --> 00:02:29,161
Okay. Bye!
- Bye!
73
00:02:31,831 --> 00:02:34,333
(door closes)
74
00:02:34,335 --> 00:02:36,635
Oh, my God!
75
00:02:36,637 --> 00:02:39,137
What just happened?
76
00:02:39,139 --> 00:02:41,673
That's a girl fight.
77
00:02:48,948 --> 00:02:50,215
Schmidt, stay
out of it, man.
78
00:02:50,217 --> 00:02:51,383
Girl fights are
dangerous, okay?
79
00:02:51,385 --> 00:02:52,885
I grew up with
three sisters,
80
00:02:52,887 --> 00:02:54,853
and I wore a cup until
I was 14 years old.
81
00:02:54,855 --> 00:02:56,488
What's wrong?
82
00:02:56,490 --> 00:02:58,991
They planned to wear braids
and bows and didn't tell me
83
00:02:58,993 --> 00:03:00,459
on purpose.
84
00:03:00,461 --> 00:03:03,262
There. Now you match.
85
00:03:10,703 --> 00:03:12,704
Well, congratulations
on having sisters,
86
00:03:12,706 --> 00:03:14,706
but I know women.
You blindfold me,
87
00:03:14,708 --> 00:03:17,009
spin me around
and drop me into a rainstorm,
88
00:03:17,011 --> 00:03:18,510
and I'll still find the G-spot.
89
00:03:18,512 --> 00:03:20,245
Schmidt...
Let us not forget
that I had boobs
90
00:03:20,247 --> 00:03:22,247
for the first 19 years
of my life.
91
00:03:22,249 --> 00:03:24,216
I grew up as a fat,
asexual friend-zoner.
92
00:03:24,218 --> 00:03:26,218
You can't buy
that kind of access.
93
00:03:26,220 --> 00:03:28,020
Schmidt, I'm talking about how
women act towards other women.
94
00:03:28,022 --> 00:03:29,888
You don't want to get
in the middle of that.
- Coach...
95
00:03:29,890 --> 00:03:31,590
Jess has the purse.
I saw it in her closet
96
00:03:31,592 --> 00:03:33,492
when it was rainy
and I was bored
97
00:03:33,494 --> 00:03:35,227
and I was feeling snoopy.
98
00:03:35,229 --> 00:03:36,562
COACH:
No, no, no...
See?
99
00:03:36,564 --> 00:03:38,230
Look-- the purse.
100
00:03:38,232 --> 00:03:40,265
In the immortal words of Tag
Team, "Whoop. There it is."
101
00:03:40,267 --> 00:03:43,168
Fine. I went back
and I bought the purse,
102
00:03:43,170 --> 00:03:44,703
'cause I love it.
103
00:03:44,705 --> 00:03:47,673
(groans)
I love purses.
104
00:03:47,675 --> 00:03:49,675
And that doesn't mean
I'm not a feminist, either.
105
00:03:49,677 --> 00:03:51,677
I'm a damn feminist
who loves purses.
106
00:03:51,679 --> 00:03:54,346
Where else am I supposed
to keep my feminist writings?
107
00:03:54,348 --> 00:03:56,348
In a purse, that's where.
108
00:03:56,350 --> 00:03:58,450
Lena Dunham.
109
00:03:58,452 --> 00:04:00,552
I don't know. I...
110
00:04:00,554 --> 00:04:02,754
Jess, it's a purse.
Who cares? Just apologize.
111
00:04:02,756 --> 00:04:05,090
Cece and I have been friends
for 20 years.
112
00:04:05,092 --> 00:04:08,427
Do you know why? Because
we're passive-aggressive people.
113
00:04:08,429 --> 00:04:09,895
We never confront
anything.
114
00:04:09,897 --> 00:04:12,364
That's the way it works with us.
It always has.
115
00:04:12,366 --> 00:04:13,732
Hi.
116
00:04:13,734 --> 00:04:15,267
Hi.
117
00:04:19,072 --> 00:04:21,406
And that was one of
the worst fights we've ever had.
118
00:04:21,408 --> 00:04:23,108
And if I bring up the purse,
119
00:04:23,110 --> 00:04:24,810
then everything else
comes up with it.
120
00:04:24,812 --> 00:04:26,078
Too many things
have happened.
121
00:04:26,080 --> 00:04:28,146
Women have amazing memories.
122
00:04:28,148 --> 00:04:29,982
Because we used to be
the gatherers,
123
00:04:29,984 --> 00:04:31,383
and so we had to remember
124
00:04:31,385 --> 00:04:33,585
where all the best berries
were hidden.
125
00:04:33,587 --> 00:04:34,987
And Cece and I,
126
00:04:34,989 --> 00:04:39,291
we've hidden berries
all across the Great Plains.
127
00:04:39,293 --> 00:04:40,792
Colorado, Kansas,
128
00:04:40,794 --> 00:04:42,060
Montana,
129
00:04:42,062 --> 00:04:44,396
Nebraska-- need I say more?
130
00:04:44,398 --> 00:04:45,597
Coach gets it.
131
00:04:45,599 --> 00:04:47,132
See, Cece and I,
we're gonna be fine,
132
00:04:47,134 --> 00:04:49,101
'cause it's gonna play out
the way it always does.
133
00:04:49,103 --> 00:04:50,168
We're not gonna talk
for three days,
134
00:04:50,170 --> 00:04:51,336
and then
I'll surprise her
135
00:04:51,338 --> 00:04:52,971
with a latte.
And then we'll act
136
00:04:52,973 --> 00:04:54,573
like nothing happened.
Three days without Cece?
137
00:04:54,575 --> 00:04:56,074
Do I have to spend
three days without Cece?
138
00:04:56,076 --> 00:04:58,010
Yes. I don't trust you
around her.
139
00:04:58,012 --> 00:05:00,012
She makes you weak
and penis-dumb.
140
00:05:00,014 --> 00:05:01,913
Three days without Cece?
Why don't you just
141
00:05:01,915 --> 00:05:04,950
replace my shoes with bags
and turn me into a lunatic?
142
00:05:04,952 --> 00:05:07,152
Stay out of it, man.
Stay the hell out of it, bro.
143
00:05:07,154 --> 00:05:09,187
Here's a different take:
Why don't I spend
more time with her?
144
00:05:09,189 --> 00:05:10,989
Stay out of it.
- I'm confused.
145
00:05:10,991 --> 00:05:12,924
Now, should I...
Are you asking me
146
00:05:12,926 --> 00:05:16,795
to spend more time with
her or stay out of it?
147
00:05:16,797 --> 00:05:18,997
Like, for real?
148
00:05:25,004 --> 00:05:26,471
(groans)
149
00:05:26,473 --> 00:05:28,840
I hate this.
I hate first dates.
150
00:05:28,842 --> 00:05:30,142
Me, too.
- I hate all...
151
00:05:30,144 --> 00:05:31,443
I hate the second ones
and the third ones
152
00:05:31,445 --> 00:05:32,377
and the fourth ones.
Me, too. Yeah. Yeah.
153
00:05:32,379 --> 00:05:34,046
I hate dates.
- Mm-hmm.
154
00:05:34,048 --> 00:05:35,280
Yeah.
The first ones are the worst.
155
00:05:35,282 --> 00:05:36,882
Yeah.
156
00:05:36,884 --> 00:05:38,550
This is terrible.
They're terrible.
They're awkward.
157
00:05:38,552 --> 00:05:40,385
I feel like I'm being weird.
You're not being weird.
158
00:05:40,387 --> 00:05:41,620
Yeah, I am.
- I'm the weirdo.
159
00:05:41,622 --> 00:05:43,955
I wanted to do
this all night.
160
00:05:43,957 --> 00:05:45,157
Oh.
161
00:05:45,159 --> 00:05:47,693
That is so stupid.
(laughs)
162
00:05:47,695 --> 00:05:49,695
I hated that I did it.
163
00:05:49,697 --> 00:05:51,396
I feel like
I'm being weird, too.
164
00:05:51,398 --> 00:05:53,498
How?
I don't know how. Just...
165
00:05:53,500 --> 00:05:54,833
Well, now you are.
166
00:05:54,835 --> 00:05:56,568
These sweaters.
I got sweater shoulder.
167
00:05:56,570 --> 00:05:58,236
Now... when you do that,
it's very weird.
168
00:05:58,238 --> 00:05:59,504
But before, it wasn't.
169
00:05:59,506 --> 00:06:01,039
Just don't do
sweater shoulder.
170
00:06:01,041 --> 00:06:03,375
Please don't tell Tran
how bad this is going.
171
00:06:03,377 --> 00:06:04,643
Oh, I will.
172
00:06:04,645 --> 00:06:06,078
Don't. It'll be so embarrassing.
173
00:06:06,080 --> 00:06:08,146
Yeah.
He's probably my best friend.
174
00:06:08,148 --> 00:06:09,848
Really?
Yes.
175
00:06:09,850 --> 00:06:11,483
You're not his best friend.
176
00:06:11,485 --> 00:06:12,984
(laughing)
177
00:06:12,986 --> 00:06:15,721
That's a terrible thing to say.
(laughing)
178
00:06:15,723 --> 00:06:17,255
It's true.
179
00:06:17,257 --> 00:06:20,058
This is going great.
Oh, God, I hate this.
180
00:06:20,060 --> 00:06:23,695
I just want to sit around and
do nothing, but that is not hot.
181
00:06:23,697 --> 00:06:24,830
That's hot to me.
182
00:06:24,832 --> 00:06:26,164
You add some
sweatpants
183
00:06:26,166 --> 00:06:27,666
to that, and that is
better than porn.
184
00:06:27,668 --> 00:06:29,668
(chuckles)
I love porn.
185
00:06:29,670 --> 00:06:33,839
But I like to mute it
and come up with
my own voices, like,
186
00:06:33,841 --> 00:06:36,208
(deeply): "Hey, that's a very
interesting mesh cat suit."
187
00:06:36,210 --> 00:06:38,844
(high-pitched): "Thank you.
It used to be my grandmother's."
188
00:06:38,846 --> 00:06:40,779
(laughs)
- Something like that.
189
00:06:40,781 --> 00:06:42,280
Cheers.
190
00:06:42,282 --> 00:06:43,482
Yeah.
191
00:06:44,283 --> 00:06:45,851
That was a weird cheers!
192
00:06:45,853 --> 00:06:47,352
Can we go?!
193
00:06:47,354 --> 00:06:50,455
(laughs): Yes. Let's get
out of here. This sucks!
194
00:06:51,457 --> 00:06:53,725
(laughing,
speaking unintelligibly)
195
00:06:53,727 --> 00:06:55,127
So cute.
196
00:06:55,129 --> 00:06:57,429
Yeah, it's like they're
made for each other.
197
00:07:01,601 --> 00:07:04,102
They haven't moved
in three days.
- Very weird.
198
00:07:04,104 --> 00:07:05,771
Alarming, even.
199
00:07:05,773 --> 00:07:08,106
Wait, doesn't
she work or...?
200
00:07:08,108 --> 00:07:09,574
Shouldn't you be studying?
201
00:07:09,576 --> 00:07:10,742
Or live somewhere?
202
00:07:10,744 --> 00:07:12,077
Shouldn't you be studying?
203
00:07:12,079 --> 00:07:14,579
Or have worried
loved ones?
- Studying?
204
00:07:14,581 --> 00:07:16,248
Coach, this is gonna
take some serious
205
00:07:16,250 --> 00:07:18,216
investigative
police skills.
206
00:07:18,218 --> 00:07:20,552
But I'm onto her.
207
00:07:20,554 --> 00:07:22,487
I didn't know girls
could be so slovenly.
208
00:07:22,489 --> 00:07:23,755
I did. I have sisters.
209
00:07:23,757 --> 00:07:24,823
Oh, my God, we know.
210
00:07:24,825 --> 00:07:25,891
(grunts)
211
00:07:25,893 --> 00:07:29,161
We cool?
We cool.
212
00:07:31,597 --> 00:07:33,832
Oh. Just who
I was looking for.
213
00:07:33,834 --> 00:07:36,168
Hey.
- How would you like
a piping hot latte?
214
00:07:36,170 --> 00:07:38,236
Thanks, Jess,
but, you know, I, um...
215
00:07:38,238 --> 00:07:40,472
I can buy my own.
216
00:07:49,849 --> 00:07:51,550
What did you do?
217
00:07:53,686 --> 00:07:55,854
Is this about the socks?
218
00:07:59,125 --> 00:08:00,592
You weren't supposed to talk
to Cece. What happened?
219
00:08:00,594 --> 00:08:01,960
Well, I had to see her.
220
00:08:01,962 --> 00:08:03,829
I can't go three days
without seeing Cece.
221
00:08:03,831 --> 00:08:06,331
(exhales) And it went
just like you said it would.
222
00:08:07,533 --> 00:08:09,034
I'm gonna go get the purse.
223
00:08:09,036 --> 00:08:10,468
She played me
like John Popper plays that
224
00:08:10,470 --> 00:08:11,837
little harmonica
and fiddle thing.
225
00:08:11,839 --> 00:08:13,538
Ugh! She's like
a robot scientist.
226
00:08:13,540 --> 00:08:15,707
And you're like a damn robot.
227
00:08:15,709 --> 00:08:18,443
And usually it's cute,
except when you're robbing me.
228
00:08:18,445 --> 00:08:21,012
Jess, I'm sorry. So...
What-What happens now?
229
00:08:21,014 --> 00:08:23,114
You bring her another coffee
and you guys make up?
230
00:08:23,116 --> 00:08:24,850
I don't know what happens now.
231
00:08:24,852 --> 00:08:27,485
We're in unchartered territory
'cause you got involved.
232
00:08:27,487 --> 00:08:28,720
We're entering the abyss.
233
00:08:28,722 --> 00:08:30,055
It's like the month I decided
234
00:08:30,057 --> 00:08:32,657
not to wear a bra.
Those were dark times.
235
00:08:32,659 --> 00:08:35,227
I had no support.
Literally no support.
236
00:08:35,229 --> 00:08:36,862
(phone chimes)
237
00:08:38,364 --> 00:08:39,831
(scoffs)
238
00:08:39,833 --> 00:08:42,734
Cece just texted me
a smiley face.
- Is that bad?
239
00:08:42,736 --> 00:08:45,804
No, she just texted me the
world's first good smiley face.
240
00:08:45,806 --> 00:08:48,540
I'm gonna text her
(chuckles) a yellow heart.
241
00:08:48,542 --> 00:08:51,910
No, uh, yellow heart, whale,
242
00:08:51,912 --> 00:08:53,879
thumbs up.
243
00:08:53,881 --> 00:08:55,714
Well, that seems nice.
(gasps)
244
00:08:55,716 --> 00:08:59,217
How dare she? Chinese man,
ballerina, apartment building?
245
00:08:59,219 --> 00:09:00,252
What does that mean?
- Fine!
246
00:09:00,254 --> 00:09:02,153
Poop. Turban guy. Granny.
247
00:09:02,155 --> 00:09:03,922
Don't text her poop.
- (gasps)
248
00:09:03,924 --> 00:09:06,858
Explosion, monkey-see?
You want to play dirty? Fine.
249
00:09:06,860 --> 00:09:08,393
Slice of cake. Turtle.
250
00:09:08,395 --> 00:09:09,561
Don't sen... Oh.
- (gasps)
251
00:09:09,563 --> 00:09:11,796
Double syringe?
252
00:09:16,168 --> 00:09:17,702
Double syringe.
253
00:09:17,704 --> 00:09:18,937
You're right, Schmidt.
254
00:09:18,939 --> 00:09:21,907
Maybe it's time
to dig up some berries.
255
00:09:21,909 --> 00:09:25,343
The gatherers
have become the hunters.
256
00:09:25,345 --> 00:09:27,412
Be well.
257
00:09:28,447 --> 00:09:30,248
Wh-Where are you...
Where are going?
258
00:09:30,250 --> 00:09:32,350
L-Leave those berries be.
259
00:09:32,352 --> 00:09:34,185
Republican or Democrat?
West Wing.
260
00:09:34,187 --> 00:09:35,620
What's your favorite thing
about America?
261
00:09:35,622 --> 00:09:37,789
Kentucky women.
Favorite part of The Rock?
262
00:09:37,791 --> 00:09:40,225
"Welcome to the Rock."
Gorilla or monkey?
263
00:09:40,227 --> 00:09:42,527
Gorilla, hands down.
Miranda or Carrie?
264
00:09:42,529 --> 00:09:44,429
Gorilla.
- That's 100% perfect.
265
00:09:44,431 --> 00:09:45,864
Un-Unbelievable.
- Thank you.
266
00:09:45,866 --> 00:09:47,732
The battery in the
remote control is
267
00:09:47,734 --> 00:09:49,801
getting a little jumpy.
I'm gonna go grab one
268
00:09:49,803 --> 00:09:51,036
out of the smoke detector.
269
00:09:51,038 --> 00:09:53,038
That's exactly
where I get them.
270
00:09:53,040 --> 00:09:55,407
Isn't she perfect?
271
00:09:55,409 --> 00:09:57,309
In a word: No.
272
00:09:57,311 --> 00:09:59,277
Nick, you might want
to sit down for this.
273
00:09:59,279 --> 00:10:00,645
I'm already sitting.
- Okay.
274
00:10:00,647 --> 00:10:03,381
Well, look, I put
together a profile.
275
00:10:03,383 --> 00:10:04,482
Vague about where she lives.
276
00:10:04,484 --> 00:10:06,384
Okay.
- No mention of a job.
277
00:10:06,386 --> 00:10:08,053
Always lets you pay.
278
00:10:08,055 --> 00:10:10,488
Nick, my man, as unbelievable
as this sounds, (chuckles)
279
00:10:10,490 --> 00:10:12,324
you're her sugar daddy.
280
00:10:12,326 --> 00:10:15,560
What kind of girl would
want me as her sugar daddy?
281
00:10:15,562 --> 00:10:18,563
Only one kind:
a homeless woman.
282
00:10:18,565 --> 00:10:20,298
Kai is not homeless.
283
00:10:20,300 --> 00:10:23,234
Nick, I have been watching
her for days now, okay?
284
00:10:23,236 --> 00:10:25,003
She... She eats like
she doesn't know
285
00:10:25,005 --> 00:10:26,604
where her next meal
is coming from.
286
00:10:26,606 --> 00:10:29,074
She always dresses in
layers, tons of layers.
287
00:10:29,076 --> 00:10:31,676
She's not homeless.
Her grandfather is Tran.
288
00:10:31,678 --> 00:10:33,778
And where does he hang out?
A park bench.
289
00:10:33,780 --> 00:10:35,847
I think you're having
a nervous breakdown.
290
00:10:35,849 --> 00:10:37,782
I really do.
291
00:10:37,784 --> 00:10:40,352
You're nuts. You want
to avoid studying so much
292
00:10:40,354 --> 00:10:43,788
that you're making up lies
about my new lover friend.
293
00:10:43,790 --> 00:10:45,490
Just leave us alone.
294
00:10:47,126 --> 00:10:48,927
Maybe you should...
maybe you should give her
295
00:10:48,929 --> 00:10:51,262
our can opener.
Everybody gives bums cans,
296
00:10:51,264 --> 00:10:52,964
but they can't open them cans.
297
00:10:52,966 --> 00:10:54,632
How are they gonna
open the cans, Nick?
298
00:10:54,634 --> 00:10:55,967
Hey...
299
00:10:55,969 --> 00:10:58,336
What are you...
(stammers)
300
00:10:58,338 --> 00:11:00,005
Do you want a blanket?
301
00:11:00,007 --> 00:11:03,608
I must have
fallen asleep reading.
302
00:11:03,610 --> 00:11:06,011
Nap with me.
- Okay.
303
00:11:06,013 --> 00:11:07,779
Come on.
- (chuckles)
304
00:11:11,851 --> 00:11:14,853
Just... gonna get some
of these newspapers.
305
00:11:25,498 --> 00:11:27,232
It's actually kind of nice.
306
00:11:27,234 --> 00:11:29,200
See?
307
00:11:29,202 --> 00:11:31,903
More pink lemonade?
308
00:11:31,905 --> 00:11:34,239
I'm going to
name baby...
309
00:11:34,241 --> 00:11:37,842
Baby, because it's
funny. (giggles)
310
00:11:37,844 --> 00:11:40,612
(chuckles)
311
00:11:41,680 --> 00:11:44,449
Where is top of baby cage?
312
00:11:45,818 --> 00:11:47,719
Double syringe?
313
00:11:47,721 --> 00:11:50,355
Hey, you.
How's pee-pee? (giggles)
314
00:11:50,357 --> 00:11:51,523
Oh, hello, Nadia.
315
00:11:51,525 --> 00:11:53,558
Coach, I need you.
Jess and Cece
316
00:11:53,560 --> 00:11:55,427
are in a thing,
and it is terrifying.
317
00:11:55,429 --> 00:11:57,996
I'm pretty busy, but,
all right, hold on, let me
318
00:11:57,998 --> 00:11:59,998
put down the stuff
I've been working on.
319
00:12:00,000 --> 00:12:01,499
(grunting softly)
320
00:12:01,501 --> 00:12:03,034
Coach,
321
00:12:03,036 --> 00:12:04,903
I am at the baby shower.
322
00:12:04,905 --> 00:12:06,371
You're at the... What?
323
00:12:06,373 --> 00:12:07,705
Are you dumb? You're dumb.
324
00:12:07,707 --> 00:12:09,507
You're very dumb.
Get out of there.
325
00:12:09,509 --> 00:12:11,209
I panicked. I didn't know
what else to do.
326
00:12:11,211 --> 00:12:13,378
I thought I could fix this.
I gave Cece the purse.
327
00:12:13,380 --> 00:12:14,612
Obviously, it was a mistake.
328
00:12:14,614 --> 00:12:15,914
Oh, God, look at them.
329
00:12:15,916 --> 00:12:17,282
They're like silent, angry
330
00:12:17,284 --> 00:12:19,751
statues right now--
it's terrifying and als...
331
00:12:19,753 --> 00:12:21,419
Maybe a little erotic.
332
00:12:22,288 --> 00:12:23,721
Okay, fine, it's very erotic.
333
00:12:23,723 --> 00:12:25,356
You know what?
Coach, I'm telling you--
334
00:12:25,358 --> 00:12:27,025
I'm finding out that fear
335
00:12:27,027 --> 00:12:29,260
plays a big part
in my sexuality.
336
00:12:29,262 --> 00:12:31,062
Schmidt, what happens when
two passive-aggressive people
337
00:12:31,064 --> 00:12:32,464
start confronting each other?
338
00:12:32,466 --> 00:12:34,399
I don't know. What happens?
Anything!
339
00:12:34,401 --> 00:12:36,534
Anything can happen!
That's what I'm telling you!
340
00:12:36,536 --> 00:12:38,236
Are you ready
for anything to happen?
341
00:12:38,238 --> 00:12:40,071
Obviously not.
That's why I'm calling you.
342
00:12:40,073 --> 00:12:43,241
Did you wash your hair?
It looks really clean.
343
00:12:43,243 --> 00:12:45,276
(women gasp)
(Jess gasps)
344
00:12:45,978 --> 00:12:47,312
I can help you end this.
345
00:12:47,314 --> 00:12:48,613
Do you know why?
346
00:12:48,615 --> 00:12:51,116
Do you know why?
I'm waiting.
347
00:12:51,118 --> 00:12:53,451
Oh, my God, is it because
you have sisters?
348
00:12:53,453 --> 00:12:55,920
It's because I have sisters!
And you know what that means?
349
00:12:55,922 --> 00:12:57,422
And that you know more
about women than me.
350
00:12:57,424 --> 00:12:58,990
I know more about
women than you!
351
00:12:58,992 --> 00:12:59,958
And that I'm a little dumb-dumb.
352
00:12:59,960 --> 00:13:01,793
And I'm a big smart-smart.
353
00:13:01,795 --> 00:13:04,129
Yeah. Now, here's
what you're gonna do.
354
00:13:04,131 --> 00:13:05,497
Get big like a bear.
355
00:13:05,499 --> 00:13:07,298
If that doesn't work,
pee a circle
356
00:13:07,300 --> 00:13:09,234
around yourself
and light it on fire.
357
00:13:09,236 --> 00:13:11,102
I peed before I came--
I had a root beer with lunch.
358
00:13:11,104 --> 00:13:13,338
I'm on my way.
Hey, uh, did you bring a gift?
359
00:13:13,340 --> 00:13:14,973
'Cause I don't
want to be that guy.
360
00:13:14,975 --> 00:13:16,574
You know, the guy
that doesn't bring a gift?
361
00:13:16,576 --> 00:13:18,309
Just get over here.
All right, I'm coming.
362
00:13:18,311 --> 00:13:20,945
What? Coach!
363
00:13:20,947 --> 00:13:22,947
Coach, I can't turn the pages!
364
00:13:22,949 --> 00:13:25,483
How am I gonna study
if I can't turn the pages?
365
00:13:25,485 --> 00:13:27,252
Coach!
366
00:13:30,523 --> 00:13:32,290
Hey.
367
00:13:32,292 --> 00:13:34,359
(gagging)
- Great catch.
368
00:13:34,361 --> 00:13:36,327
Kai, I want to go
to your place, okay?
369
00:13:36,329 --> 00:13:37,795
Wherever it is.
370
00:13:37,797 --> 00:13:40,098
So don't be afraid,
because I'm not afraid.
371
00:13:40,100 --> 00:13:42,367
I know I'm living
this rock star life,
372
00:13:42,369 --> 00:13:45,270
but I'm still a man
of the people.
373
00:13:45,272 --> 00:13:47,805
But I'm so comfortable.
You really want to go outside,
374
00:13:47,807 --> 00:13:50,608
get off this bed into
the cold right now?
375
00:13:50,610 --> 00:13:52,510
Look, I like you for you, and...
376
00:13:52,512 --> 00:13:54,279
Well, hell, I just hope,
deep down,
377
00:13:54,281 --> 00:13:55,713
you like me for me and not
378
00:13:55,715 --> 00:13:58,082
all the incredible stuff
that I have.
379
00:13:59,185 --> 00:14:00,785
Huh?
- I mean, this room--
380
00:14:00,787 --> 00:14:02,320
half this stuff is mine.
381
00:14:02,322 --> 00:14:04,556
I'm, like,
I have enough pillowcases
382
00:14:04,558 --> 00:14:07,559
for all my pillows,
plus an extra pillowcase
383
00:14:07,561 --> 00:14:09,194
that I don't even use.
384
00:14:09,196 --> 00:14:11,462
Ticket stubs
to all the Bears games
385
00:14:11,464 --> 00:14:13,064
I've ever been to,
except for one.
386
00:14:13,066 --> 00:14:14,799
The guitar pick from
387
00:14:14,801 --> 00:14:17,502
that guy who played with
James Taylor that one night.
388
00:14:17,504 --> 00:14:19,470
A Frisbee
that I'm currently
389
00:14:19,472 --> 00:14:21,472
storing on my neighbor's roof.
390
00:14:21,474 --> 00:14:22,974
You know, an autographed
391
00:14:22,976 --> 00:14:25,877
Karate Kid II poster
from Mr. Miyagi.
392
00:14:25,879 --> 00:14:27,979
R.I.P.
- Hmm.
393
00:14:27,981 --> 00:14:29,814
But none of that matters.
394
00:14:29,816 --> 00:14:32,483
I want to be with you,
wherever you live.
395
00:14:32,485 --> 00:14:34,252
I mean, hell,
I've been cooped up
396
00:14:34,254 --> 00:14:35,687
in this palace for long enough.
397
00:14:35,689 --> 00:14:39,090
Wow. Well, if it's
that important.
398
00:14:39,092 --> 00:14:41,426
(grunts)
- (laughs)
399
00:14:41,428 --> 00:14:43,962
All right. Don't be nervous.
400
00:14:45,531 --> 00:14:48,333
You know what? I'm gonna bring
some extra blankets.
401
00:14:48,335 --> 00:14:49,901
Okay.
402
00:14:49,903 --> 00:14:52,003
Okay, just in case it's
freezing, 'cause it's outs...
403
00:14:52,005 --> 00:14:53,605
Okay.
404
00:14:53,607 --> 00:14:55,106
JESS:
And then,
405
00:14:55,108 --> 00:14:57,775
you told Mike Hannamin
I was on my period!
406
00:14:57,777 --> 00:15:00,745
He wanted to know why you were
wearing sweatpants in the pool!
407
00:15:00,747 --> 00:15:03,014
Okay, I was defending you!
408
00:15:03,016 --> 00:15:04,716
I have arrived!
409
00:15:04,718 --> 00:15:06,050
Ah, Mr. Stripper.
410
00:15:06,052 --> 00:15:07,418
Okay, so what's next, Jess?
411
00:15:07,420 --> 00:15:08,886
20 years of fights are
happening right now.
412
00:15:08,888 --> 00:15:10,555
They're getting
into everything.
413
00:15:10,557 --> 00:15:12,624
How I intentionally didn't
put gas in your car
414
00:15:12,626 --> 00:15:14,392
on senior ditch day?
You did. You did.
415
00:15:14,394 --> 00:15:16,194
I did not!
- All right, ladies,
stop it.
416
00:15:16,196 --> 00:15:19,130
I gave you the money, and you
spent it on condoms and taffy.
417
00:15:19,132 --> 00:15:21,099
By the way, that sounds
like a hell of a day.
418
00:15:21,101 --> 00:15:22,400
Well, I wouldn't know.
419
00:15:22,402 --> 00:15:24,202
I was stranded on
a beach being a virgin!
420
00:15:24,204 --> 00:15:27,205
But that's not the only time
I've been stranded, now, is it?
421
00:15:27,207 --> 00:15:28,406
I'm talking about Paris.
Oh, this is about Paris!
422
00:15:28,408 --> 00:15:30,108
I'm talking about Paris.
I knew it!
423
00:15:30,110 --> 00:15:33,144
We had signed a lease.
That's an agreement.
424
00:15:33,146 --> 00:15:35,813
And then you decide
to take a modeling job in Paris,
425
00:15:35,815 --> 00:15:37,982
so I had to move in
with Spencer?
426
00:15:37,984 --> 00:15:40,485
While you were being
squired about the Louvre,
427
00:15:40,487 --> 00:15:45,423
I was having to pee on top of
Spencer's pee to conserve water!
428
00:15:45,425 --> 00:15:46,924
You know, it's called
mud-sharking, by the way.
429
00:15:46,926 --> 00:15:48,760
It's not my fault!
- Stop it!
430
00:15:48,762 --> 00:15:50,428
I'm bored.
431
00:15:50,430 --> 00:15:51,663
Here's what you guys
are gonna do.
432
00:15:51,665 --> 00:15:52,764
You're gonna punch each other.
433
00:15:52,766 --> 00:15:54,098
Now I'm not bored.
434
00:15:54,100 --> 00:15:55,800
I'm not doing that.
- What?
435
00:15:55,802 --> 00:15:57,769
I'm not doing that.
COACH: Well, you got
to do something.
436
00:15:57,771 --> 00:16:00,238
Man up, punch each other
and end this.
437
00:16:00,240 --> 00:16:01,639
(sighs, sniffles)
COACH: You got to have it out
438
00:16:01,641 --> 00:16:02,840
so you can get
past this.
439
00:16:02,842 --> 00:16:04,475
Now I'm bored again.
440
00:16:04,477 --> 00:16:06,611
Punch each other!
Now I'm not bored.
441
00:16:06,613 --> 00:16:07,679
Talk with your fist!
442
00:16:07,681 --> 00:16:10,581
(sighs)
I just want my...
443
00:16:10,583 --> 00:16:12,283
(women screaming, shouting)
444
00:16:12,285 --> 00:16:13,351
Oh, no!
- My goodness!
445
00:16:13,353 --> 00:16:14,786
Back off!
446
00:16:14,788 --> 00:16:17,088
(grunting)
447
00:16:17,090 --> 00:16:18,323
La-Ladies?
- Oh!
448
00:16:18,325 --> 00:16:20,258
SCHMIDT:
It's spreading.
449
00:16:20,260 --> 00:16:21,092
Stop it!
450
00:16:21,094 --> 00:16:22,527
Russian baby shower!
451
00:16:22,529 --> 00:16:24,696
(women clamoring)
452
00:16:24,698 --> 00:16:26,497
(both shouting)
453
00:16:26,499 --> 00:16:28,499
Hey, hey, don't
involve us, please.
Whoa. Hey, guys, no!
454
00:16:28,501 --> 00:16:31,202
Break it up!
Break it up!
455
00:16:31,204 --> 00:16:33,971
Baby shower! Baby shower, yeah!
Baby shower!
456
00:16:33,973 --> 00:16:35,673
Oh, stop it!
457
00:16:35,675 --> 00:16:37,942
You stole my babysitter!
458
00:16:40,145 --> 00:16:42,013
What are you doing?
459
00:16:42,015 --> 00:16:43,214
I'm having a situation.
460
00:16:43,216 --> 00:16:45,116
Oh, come on, dude.
461
00:16:45,118 --> 00:16:47,618
Get off!
Fighting for no damn
reason with me?!
462
00:16:47,620 --> 00:16:51,155
Come on, just... lie down
and take it like a woman!
463
00:16:51,157 --> 00:16:53,491
This is for
Mike Hannamin.
(groans)
464
00:16:53,493 --> 00:16:55,993
(laughing)
- (screaming)
465
00:16:55,995 --> 00:16:58,296
Baby kick! Baby like!
466
00:16:58,298 --> 00:16:59,697
Yay!
467
00:17:09,875 --> 00:17:11,709
Do I look pretty?
468
00:17:11,711 --> 00:17:15,146
(both laughing)
469
00:17:15,148 --> 00:17:16,748
Do you feel, like,
really good right now?
470
00:17:16,750 --> 00:17:18,816
Yes! I thought I was crazy.
471
00:17:18,818 --> 00:17:20,585
No, you're not crazy.
472
00:17:20,587 --> 00:17:22,587
I think I... I think I wanted
473
00:17:22,589 --> 00:17:24,655
to punch you
for a really long time.
474
00:17:24,657 --> 00:17:25,823
Felt that way.
475
00:17:25,825 --> 00:17:28,693
Like, maybe ten or 15 years.
476
00:17:28,695 --> 00:17:30,428
And it feels so good
477
00:17:30,430 --> 00:17:33,097
that right now we don't have
to talk everything through.
478
00:17:33,099 --> 00:17:34,599
Yeah. We can just punch it out.
479
00:17:34,601 --> 00:17:35,833
Oh, my God, I have missed you.
480
00:17:35,835 --> 00:17:38,236
(both laughing)
481
00:17:38,238 --> 00:17:40,071
I can't believe
I've known you 20 years.
482
00:17:40,073 --> 00:17:43,808
And you're still
my favorite person to talk to.
483
00:17:45,744 --> 00:17:48,279
And you're my favorite person
to talk to.
484
00:17:49,081 --> 00:17:50,515
I hate not talking to you.
485
00:17:50,517 --> 00:17:52,216
I feel like
I've missed everything!
486
00:17:52,218 --> 00:17:53,618
You did miss everything.
487
00:17:53,620 --> 00:17:54,752
So, does Nick have a girlfriend?
488
00:17:54,754 --> 00:17:56,687
Yes. So weird.
- You okay?
489
00:17:56,689 --> 00:17:58,589
Yes. It's so weird.
- (laughing)
490
00:17:58,591 --> 00:18:01,526
So, is Nadia going to raise
the baby in your apartment?
491
00:18:01,528 --> 00:18:03,795
Yeah, we haven't really
talked about that yet.
492
00:18:04,596 --> 00:18:06,097
You should.
493
00:18:06,099 --> 00:18:08,366
(laughing)
494
00:18:08,368 --> 00:18:09,901
Craig Hodges.
495
00:18:09,903 --> 00:18:10,935
Oh!
496
00:18:10,937 --> 00:18:13,938
(phone ringing)
497
00:18:13,940 --> 00:18:16,107
Hello. Nick.
Nick, are you okay?
498
00:18:16,109 --> 00:18:17,809
NICK: Winston?
Listen, listen, listen, Nick.
499
00:18:17,811 --> 00:18:19,143
Winston.
Tell me everything.
500
00:18:19,145 --> 00:18:20,912
Winston, she's rich!
501
00:18:20,914 --> 00:18:22,079
Yeah, she founded some company
502
00:18:22,081 --> 00:18:24,482
that sells fancy water bottles
503
00:18:24,484 --> 00:18:27,552
to rich people to pay
for digging wells in Africa.
504
00:18:27,554 --> 00:18:29,086
She sold the company, so now
505
00:18:29,088 --> 00:18:30,922
she works whenever she wants.
506
00:18:30,924 --> 00:18:32,623
It's a scam called consulting.
507
00:18:32,625 --> 00:18:34,091
You see, I knew it.
508
00:18:34,093 --> 00:18:35,827
I knew there was
something weird. I was right!
509
00:18:35,829 --> 00:18:38,763
You were wrong
about literally everything.
510
00:18:38,765 --> 00:18:40,665
But I knew there was gonna be
a twist, though.
511
00:18:40,667 --> 00:18:42,633
Okay, do you realize
how much time you've wasted,
512
00:18:42,635 --> 00:18:43,901
and you're not studying?
513
00:18:43,903 --> 00:18:47,505
Sweet Baby LeBron James,
I screwed up.
514
00:18:51,810 --> 00:18:53,744
(groans)
515
00:18:53,746 --> 00:18:55,580
Hey, I should
probably get going.
516
00:18:55,582 --> 00:18:57,148
I got to get to work.
517
00:18:57,150 --> 00:18:58,516
Yeah, it's karaoke night,
518
00:18:58,518 --> 00:19:00,017
so I got to get
there early enough
519
00:19:00,019 --> 00:19:01,652
to break the
karaoke machine.
520
00:19:01,654 --> 00:19:03,988
How much will you make tonight?
521
00:19:03,990 --> 00:19:06,858
Ah, it depends how much I drink,
but probably about 140 bucks.
522
00:19:12,364 --> 00:19:13,998
What is this?
523
00:19:14,000 --> 00:19:17,835
I raise you to $200.
524
00:19:19,271 --> 00:19:21,772
Now you can stay.
525
00:19:21,774 --> 00:19:24,175
Deal!
526
00:19:24,177 --> 00:19:25,343
Oh.
- (laughs)
527
00:19:25,345 --> 00:19:26,711
I'm like a boy hooker.
528
00:19:26,713 --> 00:19:27,979
(both laugh)
529
00:19:27,981 --> 00:19:29,447
Thank you.
530
00:19:29,449 --> 00:19:30,948
Are you crying?
531
00:19:31,984 --> 00:19:34,285
Don't look at me.
532
00:19:34,287 --> 00:19:36,153
I want to look pretty.
You paid for it.
533
00:19:36,155 --> 00:19:37,622
(both laugh)
534
00:19:37,624 --> 00:19:39,524
Nadia is the one
who broke my thing.
535
00:19:39,526 --> 00:19:40,892
Wait, you were serious
about that?
536
00:19:40,894 --> 00:19:42,460
Yes. That was her.
I'm telling you.
537
00:19:42,462 --> 00:19:44,462
She's going to have to
childproof the corners
538
00:19:44,464 --> 00:19:46,664
of her cha-cha before
that baby comes out.
539
00:19:46,666 --> 00:19:48,065
Oh, Cecilia.
540
00:19:48,067 --> 00:19:50,735
Thank goodness. Look at you.
You're still pretty.
541
00:19:50,737 --> 00:19:51,736
And, Jess, you know,
542
00:19:51,738 --> 00:19:53,037
you-you look the same.
543
00:19:53,039 --> 00:19:54,238
COACH: I'm sorry
about making you guys
544
00:19:54,240 --> 00:19:56,207
punch each other.
- Don't be sorry.
545
00:19:56,209 --> 00:19:57,842
You're so right.
- Mm.
546
00:19:57,844 --> 00:19:59,377
We've wasted so much time
being passive-aggressive.
547
00:19:59,379 --> 00:20:01,212
We learned our lesson.
- Yeah.
548
00:20:01,214 --> 00:20:03,548
Well, we're very smart.
That means a lot. Thank you.
549
00:20:03,550 --> 00:20:05,216
Seriously, if you guys
fought like girls,
550
00:20:05,218 --> 00:20:07,151
you'd still be
arguing over the fact
551
00:20:07,153 --> 00:20:09,253
that you recorded football over
your Charlie Rose episodes.
552
00:20:09,255 --> 00:20:11,556
It's all good, man.
We're not though.
553
00:20:11,558 --> 00:20:13,357
Mm-hmm, and the girl Schmidt
would be like,
554
00:20:13,359 --> 00:20:15,493
"Oh, does Coach just think
I'm a pretentious poseur
555
00:20:15,495 --> 00:20:17,361
"who just records
things to look smart
556
00:20:17,363 --> 00:20:20,231
"because deep down,
I am just terrifyingly insecure
557
00:20:20,233 --> 00:20:21,899
about my intelligence?"
558
00:20:21,901 --> 00:20:23,834
JESS: Yeah, and girl Coach
would be, like,
559
00:20:23,836 --> 00:20:25,770
"Does Schmidt think that
I'm an uncultured meathead
560
00:20:25,772 --> 00:20:27,438
"who has to rewatch football
561
00:20:27,440 --> 00:20:30,007
because I'm afraid of showing
anyone my softer side?"
562
00:20:30,009 --> 00:20:31,108
(clears throat quietly)
563
00:20:31,110 --> 00:20:34,612
(Cece and Jess laugh)
564
00:20:36,915 --> 00:20:38,249
Hey, man.
565
00:20:38,251 --> 00:20:39,717
Oh, hey, Coach.
- Aw, hey, you.
566
00:20:39,719 --> 00:20:41,085
That's nice.
- Oh, this?
567
00:20:41,087 --> 00:20:42,720
I-I don't know.
Thanks, I guess.
568
00:20:42,722 --> 00:20:44,789
I'm kind of
whatever about it.
- No.
569
00:20:44,791 --> 00:20:46,090
What do you got there?
570
00:20:46,092 --> 00:20:47,625
Oh, me? Uh, just
some sneakers.
571
00:20:47,627 --> 00:20:49,026
(laughs)
I hope they're okay.
572
00:20:49,028 --> 00:20:50,795
I don't have an eye
for things like you.
573
00:20:50,797 --> 00:20:53,297
Well, yeah, you do. Come on,
don't be so hard on yourself.
574
00:20:53,299 --> 00:20:55,099
Your eye is so good.
- I'm sure
they're great.
575
00:20:55,101 --> 00:20:57,401
I...
- Not that you could
look bad in anything really.
576
00:20:57,403 --> 00:20:58,469
(laughs)
577
00:20:58,471 --> 00:21:00,538
(groans)
- (groans)
Son of a...
578
00:21:00,540 --> 00:21:01,906
(groans)
Thank you for that.
579
00:21:01,908 --> 00:21:03,774
Yeah,
thanks, man.
- Anytime.
580
00:21:03,776 --> 00:21:05,876
We cool?
- Yeah, we cool.
581
00:21:05,878 --> 00:21:07,612
(whistles)
582
00:21:07,614 --> 00:21:09,614
Ooh, boy.
583
00:21:09,616 --> 00:21:11,949
How many pages
are in this thing?
584
00:21:11,951 --> 00:21:14,218
Darius Miles. Oh!
585
00:21:14,220 --> 00:21:16,253
Hmm.
586
00:21:16,255 --> 00:21:17,888
That's in there?
587
00:21:17,890 --> 00:21:19,790
Jordan.
588
00:21:19,792 --> 00:21:23,227
Massaging is illegal?
(groans)
589
00:21:23,229 --> 00:21:25,329
What?!
590
00:21:26,164 --> 00:21:28,332
Got to download a song.
591
00:21:33,071 --> 00:21:36,073
Captioned by
Media Access Group at WGBH
access.wgbh.org