1
00:00:01,618 --> 00:00:03,652
(British accent):
Hello!
- Hey.
- Hi.
2
00:00:03,654 --> 00:00:06,355
Happy St. Valentine's Day,
mates.
3
00:00:06,357 --> 00:00:10,792
I just spent the week at Ryan's,
and it was absolutely lovely.
4
00:00:10,794 --> 00:00:12,027
COACH:
Fake accent,
5
00:00:12,029 --> 00:00:14,196
smug attitude--
this is exactly why
6
00:00:14,198 --> 00:00:16,231
the teachers
have turned on Jyan.
7
00:00:16,233 --> 00:00:18,567
Jyan?! Come on!
8
00:00:18,569 --> 00:00:21,336
You chose the worst parts
of both our names.
9
00:00:21,338 --> 00:00:23,305
That's why we chose it.
Haters gonna "H."
10
00:00:23,307 --> 00:00:25,307
That's why Ryan
has to find a new job.
11
00:00:25,309 --> 00:00:26,909
You know, I hear Elijah Wood's
looking for a stunt double.
12
00:00:26,911 --> 00:00:28,510
(laughter)
13
00:00:28,512 --> 00:00:30,078
He's so small!
14
00:00:30,080 --> 00:00:31,647
Get back in that tree
and make me some cookies, Ryan!
15
00:00:31,649 --> 00:00:32,681
Cookies!
- WINSTON:
Yeah!
16
00:00:32,683 --> 00:00:34,750
I know, so hot, right?
17
00:00:36,152 --> 00:00:38,820
Anyway, what's going on
in your little lives?
18
00:00:38,822 --> 00:00:40,556
Well, I'm just enjoying
the fruits of dating
19
00:00:40,558 --> 00:00:41,990
a semi-powerful
local politician.
20
00:00:41,992 --> 00:00:43,325
Tonight,
it's a Valentine's Day
21
00:00:43,327 --> 00:00:45,060
cardiologists' soiree.
22
00:00:45,062 --> 00:00:46,828
Check that out.
- Oh!
23
00:00:46,830 --> 00:00:48,931
Oh, my goodness.
Is that the invitation?
24
00:00:48,933 --> 00:00:50,699
Wait, that's a real heart?
Looks like meat.
25
00:00:50,701 --> 00:00:52,568
It's not shaped
like this?
- Yeah, well, you know,
26
00:00:52,570 --> 00:00:53,936
the cardiologists feel
27
00:00:53,938 --> 00:00:55,904
that the traditional
cartoon heart, uh...
28
00:00:55,906 --> 00:00:57,906
promotes ignorance.
That's gross.
29
00:00:57,908 --> 00:01:00,242
Where's Nick? How is he handling
the breakup with Kai?
30
00:01:00,244 --> 00:01:02,044
I don't know-- I haven't seen
Fat Fat Fatty in a long time.
31
00:01:02,046 --> 00:01:03,845
Yeah, me, either.
Yeah, I haven't seen
him since the breakup.
32
00:01:03,847 --> 00:01:05,681
You live in
the same room as him.
33
00:01:05,683 --> 00:01:07,049
I've been crashing in your room
while you're away.
34
00:01:07,051 --> 00:01:08,250
Is Nick missing?
35
00:01:08,252 --> 00:01:10,352
No, he is not.
36
00:01:10,354 --> 00:01:11,753
Oh, boy.
(chuckles): Hey.
37
00:01:11,755 --> 00:01:13,055
SCHMIDT: Oh, wow.
COACH: You look terrible.
38
00:01:13,057 --> 00:01:14,790
Hey, Nick.
Are you covered in gravy?
39
00:01:14,792 --> 00:01:18,727
Nope. I've been in my room
for the last week sleeping
40
00:01:18,729 --> 00:01:20,262
and thinking
41
00:01:20,264 --> 00:01:23,365
and really getting into
the comic strip Cathy.
42
00:01:23,367 --> 00:01:26,234
Oh, so really excited that we
can finally talk about Cathy.
43
00:01:26,236 --> 00:01:27,569
When she's mad, she says, "Ack."
44
00:01:27,571 --> 00:01:28,971
Ack.
- Ack.
45
00:01:28,973 --> 00:01:30,606
Ack!
- Nick, why would you
come out here?
46
00:01:30,608 --> 00:01:32,441
Sounds like you were doing
pretty good in there.
47
00:01:32,443 --> 00:01:33,709
Doug's Ale House.
48
00:01:33,711 --> 00:01:37,079
The new bar on Sixth and Spring?
No.
49
00:01:37,081 --> 00:01:39,915
The exact coordinates
to complete my bar crawl
50
00:01:39,917 --> 00:01:42,884
that I've been working on
for almost a decade.
51
00:01:42,886 --> 00:01:43,986
What?!
- Ooh.
52
00:01:43,988 --> 00:01:45,253
SCHMIDT:
Big day.
- Thanks.
53
00:01:45,255 --> 00:01:46,555
And guess what? Good news.
54
00:01:46,557 --> 00:01:48,457
(imitates drumroll)
55
00:01:48,459 --> 00:01:50,459
It's tonight! Who's in?
56
00:01:50,461 --> 00:01:52,661
Oh...
WINSTON: You know, I'm on call
at the station tonight,
57
00:01:52,663 --> 00:01:53,996
so I can't really drink, so...
58
00:01:53,998 --> 00:01:55,831
Fawn's speaking
at a cardiologist event.
59
00:01:55,833 --> 00:01:57,966
Ryan and I have a reservation at
a really fancy restaurant, so...
60
00:01:57,968 --> 00:01:59,301
You're probably thinking,
61
00:01:59,303 --> 00:02:01,803
"Oh, a bar crawl
on Valentine's Day--
62
00:02:01,805 --> 00:02:05,107
is this about Nick's breakup
with Kai?" No.
63
00:02:05,109 --> 00:02:06,775
Yeah.
- Now you might be
asking yourself,
64
00:02:06,777 --> 00:02:09,344
"Is attendance
really mandatory?"
65
00:02:09,346 --> 00:02:11,380
You bet it is.
66
00:02:12,415 --> 00:02:13,782
Bar crawl!
67
00:02:13,784 --> 00:02:15,417
Hmm.
68
00:02:15,419 --> 00:02:17,452
He's about to crack.
We have to go tonight.
69
00:02:17,454 --> 00:02:19,354
So I have news about a bar cr...
70
00:02:19,356 --> 00:02:22,024
Was I just out here talking
to you guys about the bar crawl?
71
00:02:22,026 --> 00:02:23,825
Did I already
pitch it all to you?
72
00:02:23,827 --> 00:02:26,395
Well, it's happening tonight!
73
00:02:34,137 --> 00:02:37,773
Okay, so we hit six bars
in five hours.
74
00:02:37,775 --> 00:02:39,274
Wait, wouldn't six hours
make more sense?
75
00:02:39,276 --> 00:02:41,009
Yeah, that'd make sense
'cause it all divides...
76
00:02:41,011 --> 00:02:42,978
No, no, it doesn't,
because it's...
77
00:02:42,980 --> 00:02:44,680
it's five hours.
78
00:02:44,682 --> 00:02:46,615
Now, the amazing thing is,
79
00:02:46,617 --> 00:02:50,052
if you connect all
the coordinates, the six bars
80
00:02:50,054 --> 00:02:53,155
form a perfect smiley face
on the map-- look.
81
00:02:53,157 --> 00:02:54,690
You didn't actually connect
all the coordinates.
82
00:02:54,692 --> 00:02:56,124
Oh, my...
- WINSTON:
Hey, I think
83
00:02:56,126 --> 00:02:58,627
it is a really
cool smiley face.
84
00:02:58,629 --> 00:03:00,862
Thank you.
- I got your back, man.
I got your back.
85
00:03:00,864 --> 00:03:02,698
Actually, I have
all your backs, all right?
86
00:03:02,700 --> 00:03:05,233
Uh, since I can't drink tonight,
I am your designated buddy.
87
00:03:05,235 --> 00:03:08,637
Here in my backpack,
I have a list of items
88
00:03:08,639 --> 00:03:10,072
that we may need.
89
00:03:10,074 --> 00:03:12,040
I got water, so...
90
00:03:12,042 --> 00:03:13,975
I got towels for everybody.
Perfect.
91
00:03:13,977 --> 00:03:15,544
I got... small stick.
92
00:03:15,546 --> 00:03:17,579
Speaks for itself.
Oh.
93
00:03:17,581 --> 00:03:20,549
Oh. Also... one female condom.
94
00:03:20,551 --> 00:03:22,851
It's gonna go quick, so I'll let
you two fight it out.
95
00:03:22,853 --> 00:03:24,686
CECE: Uh-uh.
- Also, I got
96
00:03:24,688 --> 00:03:26,855
tissues for you,
Nick, 'cause...
- What for?
97
00:03:26,857 --> 00:03:28,657
It's-it's Valentine's Day,
and your girlfriend broke up.
98
00:03:28,659 --> 00:03:30,025
Yeah, it's gonna be sad...
Move it right along, man.
99
00:03:30,027 --> 00:03:31,893
Cool it. And the
bar crawl starts...
100
00:03:31,895 --> 00:03:33,995
now!
- Now!
101
00:03:33,997 --> 00:03:35,330
(all cheering and whooping)
102
00:03:35,332 --> 00:03:36,898
Actually,
where's Schmidt?
103
00:03:36,900 --> 00:03:39,000
Well, it's with a heavy heart...
104
00:03:39,002 --> 00:03:40,869
(laughs): Oh!
...that we really
must leave you.
105
00:03:40,871 --> 00:03:43,004
We really must.
He's too much.
It was a pleasure.
106
00:03:43,006 --> 00:03:44,106
Pleasure.
107
00:03:44,108 --> 00:03:45,507
Easy on the puns, okay?
108
00:03:45,509 --> 00:03:47,175
And you've got broccoli
in your teeth.
109
00:03:47,177 --> 00:03:49,211
Remember what I told you about
eating at public functions?
110
00:03:49,213 --> 00:03:51,279
Only use your back teeth.
Only use your back teeth.
111
00:03:51,281 --> 00:03:53,248
Hey, Fawn, I'm sorry.
We should probably get
112
00:03:53,250 --> 00:03:55,250
to Nick's bar
crawl now, yeah?
113
00:03:55,252 --> 00:03:58,286
You remember? I confirmed
it, like, ten times
with your intern.
114
00:03:58,288 --> 00:03:59,921
Yes, yes, yes, no.
115
00:03:59,923 --> 00:04:01,890
First, I need to, uh,
schmooze some vascular surgeons.
116
00:04:01,892 --> 00:04:04,359
Got to get a discount
on my spider vein removal. Okay?
117
00:04:04,361 --> 00:04:06,294
Okay, ten minutes tops.
118
00:04:06,296 --> 00:04:07,896
We're still going to
dinner, 'cause it took
119
00:04:07,898 --> 00:04:09,064
a lot to get this
reservation.
120
00:04:09,066 --> 00:04:10,532
Also, we can't
get wasted
121
00:04:10,534 --> 00:04:12,267
'cause it's a very
nice restaurant.
122
00:04:12,269 --> 00:04:14,803
Which means we have to pretend
to drink in front of Nick.
123
00:04:14,805 --> 00:04:16,872
Is that really necessary?
124
00:04:16,874 --> 00:04:18,106
Oh, yakkety-yakkety-yak.
125
00:04:18,108 --> 00:04:19,141
Don't ruin my bar crawl.
126
00:04:19,143 --> 00:04:20,041
Let's go. Drink.
127
00:04:20,043 --> 00:04:21,910
Mmm.
- Mmm.
128
00:04:21,912 --> 00:04:24,045
Mmm, mmm.
129
00:04:24,047 --> 00:04:25,447
Boom!
130
00:04:25,449 --> 00:04:27,415
I'm gonna outdrink
you tonight, Miller.
131
00:04:27,417 --> 00:04:29,985
Cece, your mouth
is writing a check
132
00:04:29,987 --> 00:04:31,953
that your body can't find.
(laughs)
133
00:04:31,955 --> 00:04:33,288
That's not an expression.
134
00:04:33,290 --> 00:04:35,157
Regionally specific
to Northern Illinois.
135
00:04:35,159 --> 00:04:36,558
We say it all the time.
136
00:04:36,560 --> 00:04:38,059
Thank you, Winston.
You're welcome.
137
00:04:38,061 --> 00:04:39,895
Don't write a check
your body can't find.
138
00:04:39,897 --> 00:04:41,296
(laughs)
Every day, man.
139
00:04:41,298 --> 00:04:42,931
For real.
- Got to. Got to.
140
00:04:42,933 --> 00:04:44,633
A gimlet for May.
141
00:04:44,635 --> 00:04:45,734
Thank you.
142
00:04:45,736 --> 00:04:47,502
Watch and learn, player.
143
00:04:47,504 --> 00:04:48,670
If you're a girl
and you're
144
00:04:48,672 --> 00:04:50,438
in a bar on Valentine's Day,
145
00:04:50,440 --> 00:04:52,674
you're basically saying,
"Hello. Good February.
146
00:04:52,676 --> 00:04:54,442
I'm interested in casual sex."
147
00:04:54,444 --> 00:04:55,710
(chuckles)
- Hmm.
148
00:04:56,946 --> 00:04:58,013
May, huh?
149
00:04:58,015 --> 00:05:00,315
That's your name?
- Yeah.
150
00:05:00,317 --> 00:05:03,118
Ah, that's crazy 'cause,
uh... (coughing loudly)
151
00:05:03,120 --> 00:05:05,287
(clears throat, groans)
152
00:05:05,289 --> 00:05:06,922
I know I just met you,
153
00:05:06,924 --> 00:05:08,990
but your name's already
written on my heart.
154
00:05:08,992 --> 00:05:10,926
It's fate, baby.
155
00:05:10,928 --> 00:05:13,261
It's fate-- seriously?
NICK: All right, come on!
156
00:05:13,263 --> 00:05:15,597
Five-minute warning, let's go.
Dude, I'm kind of in the
middle of something.
157
00:05:15,599 --> 00:05:17,365
Oh, no, nope,
you're in the middle of nothing,
158
00:05:17,367 --> 00:05:19,034
because that's the cheesiest
thing I've ever seen.
159
00:05:19,036 --> 00:05:20,769
(chuckles)
She hates you, Ernie.
160
00:05:20,771 --> 00:05:23,171
But I don't like her for
you, anyway. Let's go.
161
00:05:23,173 --> 00:05:24,873
Wait, what do you mean?
162
00:05:24,875 --> 00:05:26,775
I just don't know what to do.
No schools are hiring.
163
00:05:26,777 --> 00:05:28,210
I've contacted everyone I know.
164
00:05:28,212 --> 00:05:30,278
I even checked through
all my contacts in England,
165
00:05:30,280 --> 00:05:31,813
including my old headmaster
at Wellington Prep,
166
00:05:31,815 --> 00:05:33,882
to see if he knew of anything
in the States.
167
00:05:33,884 --> 00:05:37,385
¶ Where there's a will, there's
a Wellington way. ¶ (giggles)
168
00:05:37,387 --> 00:05:40,388
How do you know
the Wellington fight song?
You sing it in your sleep.
169
00:05:40,390 --> 00:05:42,324
Oh, God.
Look, don't worry,
170
00:05:42,326 --> 00:05:44,659
you're gonna find a job.
I'm just worried
about not seeing you
171
00:05:44,661 --> 00:05:46,494
as much if I switch schools.
Well...
172
00:05:46,496 --> 00:05:48,363
I'll just have to
sleep over more.
173
00:05:48,365 --> 00:05:51,700
Or you could move in with me.
174
00:05:53,836 --> 00:05:55,737
Did the music just get louder?
175
00:05:55,739 --> 00:05:58,907
(whoops) The crawl rolls on
and Winston's got the rear!
176
00:05:58,909 --> 00:06:00,008
Let's go!
CECE: Let's go.
177
00:06:00,010 --> 00:06:01,309
(whooping)
178
00:06:01,311 --> 00:06:03,011
WINSTON:
Let's go, let's go, let's go.
179
00:06:03,013 --> 00:06:05,046
Let's go. I got the backpack
in the back of the pack!
180
00:06:08,184 --> 00:06:10,185
Hey, so listen, can't
make the crawl. Bummed.
181
00:06:10,187 --> 00:06:11,920
What?
- But remember, tomorrow
we have that photo shoot,
182
00:06:11,922 --> 00:06:13,855
and I'm gonna need you
to look as Mexican
183
00:06:13,857 --> 00:06:15,190
as possible, okay?
184
00:06:15,192 --> 00:06:16,391
It's not okay.
We should be together.
185
00:06:16,393 --> 00:06:17,759
It's Valentine's Day.
186
00:06:17,761 --> 00:06:19,327
Come on, you don't really care
187
00:06:19,329 --> 00:06:20,896
about Valentine's Day, do you?
188
00:06:20,898 --> 00:06:22,097
I don't know, maybe I do.
189
00:06:22,099 --> 00:06:23,164
Plus, you owe me.
190
00:06:23,166 --> 00:06:24,332
I ran the teleprompter at your
191
00:06:24,334 --> 00:06:26,234
last debate--
I made "Fawn is Fine"
192
00:06:26,236 --> 00:06:27,836
bumper stickers on my own dime.
193
00:06:27,838 --> 00:06:30,872
Yeah.
- I even krumped
at that anti-gang initiative.
194
00:06:30,874 --> 00:06:33,108
(hip-hop song playing)
195
00:06:36,345 --> 00:06:38,179
Yeah, I have mixed
feelings about that.
196
00:06:38,181 --> 00:06:39,581
Me, too. The point is,
- Yeah.
197
00:06:39,583 --> 00:06:41,116
I'm tired of always
doing your things.
198
00:06:41,118 --> 00:06:43,418
What do you want? You want a...
you want a photo op
199
00:06:43,420 --> 00:06:44,920
or you want a boyfriend?
200
00:06:44,922 --> 00:06:47,422
Call me when you know
what you want.
Yeah, okay.
201
00:06:48,724 --> 00:06:49,858
¶ ¶
202
00:06:49,860 --> 00:06:52,227
This bar completes the eyes
203
00:06:52,229 --> 00:06:53,728
on my smiley face.
204
00:06:53,730 --> 00:06:54,930
Miller, man, it's just an honor
205
00:06:54,932 --> 00:06:56,264
to be on this
bar crawl with you.
206
00:06:56,266 --> 00:06:57,599
Just serving your vision.
207
00:06:57,601 --> 00:06:59,434
Are you guys
going on a bar crawl?
208
00:06:59,436 --> 00:07:01,136
I just got dumped,
so this holiday
209
00:07:01,138 --> 00:07:03,405
is really kicking me
in the penis.
210
00:07:03,407 --> 00:07:05,240
Me, too, man.
Me, too.
211
00:07:05,242 --> 00:07:06,474
It's been a real
212
00:07:06,476 --> 00:07:08,109
kick in the gooch.
213
00:07:08,111 --> 00:07:10,278
Not anymore, it's not.
214
00:07:10,280 --> 00:07:11,546
'Cause you're joining us.
215
00:07:11,548 --> 00:07:12,814
Valentine's Day
216
00:07:12,816 --> 00:07:14,382
might be for couples,
217
00:07:14,384 --> 00:07:16,618
but the crawl is for all.
218
00:07:16,620 --> 00:07:18,887
Yes.
- We just got our
motto, folks.
219
00:07:18,889 --> 00:07:22,057
ALL:
The bar crawl is for all!
220
00:07:25,428 --> 00:07:27,829
Good evening.
Happy Valentine's Day.
221
00:07:27,831 --> 00:07:29,264
May I offer you
a piece of my hear...?
222
00:07:29,266 --> 00:07:30,565
Hey.
223
00:07:30,567 --> 00:07:32,300
You again.
224
00:07:32,302 --> 00:07:34,402
I'm curious, d-do you actually
think that's gonna work?
225
00:07:34,404 --> 00:07:36,237
I mean, you tell me.
226
00:07:36,239 --> 00:07:37,906
(imitates heart pumping)
227
00:07:37,908 --> 00:07:39,607
Are you trolling bars
on Valentine's Day,
228
00:07:39,609 --> 00:07:42,010
trying to find sad, single
girls to hook up with you?
229
00:07:42,012 --> 00:07:44,446
I'm not gonna say yes,
and I'm not gonna say no,
230
00:07:44,448 --> 00:07:46,581
because saying no
would be a lie.
231
00:07:46,583 --> 00:07:47,582
So yes.
232
00:07:47,584 --> 00:07:48,917
I'm gonna...
233
00:07:48,919 --> 00:07:50,085
I'm gonna take these.
Don't!
234
00:07:50,087 --> 00:07:51,486
Yep.
- Paid $3.50 for those.
235
00:07:51,488 --> 00:07:53,321
You owe me $3.50.
236
00:07:53,323 --> 00:07:55,590
I don't know,
it's just such a huge step
237
00:07:55,592 --> 00:07:57,025
and so early in
the relationship, and I thought
238
00:07:57,027 --> 00:07:58,293
that I could skip the question
239
00:07:58,295 --> 00:07:59,828
and come back to it later,
240
00:07:59,830 --> 00:08:02,097
which is the strategy
I taught my S.A.T. prep course.
241
00:08:02,099 --> 00:08:03,631
All right, let's do
pros and cons.
242
00:08:03,633 --> 00:08:05,333
Okay, pros: I love him.
243
00:08:05,335 --> 00:08:08,103
I love his house.
I love his accent.
244
00:08:08,105 --> 00:08:10,271
When he says "raccoon,"
he says it like "rac-coon."
245
00:08:10,273 --> 00:08:12,240
Adorable.
Cons...
246
00:08:13,042 --> 00:08:15,143
His toaster is super-old.
247
00:08:15,145 --> 00:08:17,612
WOMAN: Ugh! I tried to stay out
of this, but move in with him!
248
00:08:17,614 --> 00:08:20,048
Yeah, well, I-I want
to move in with him, but...
249
00:08:20,050 --> 00:08:21,483
No "but," there's no damn "but."
250
00:08:21,485 --> 00:08:23,218
No "but."
- But...
251
00:08:23,220 --> 00:08:26,955
what if I blew it
by pretending I didn't hear him?
252
00:08:26,957 --> 00:08:28,656
Or maybe it wasn't that obvious.
253
00:08:28,658 --> 00:08:30,859
Nah, she heard me.
It was very obvious.
254
00:08:30,861 --> 00:08:32,394
I really hate
to see you upset.
255
00:08:32,396 --> 00:08:33,828
You know, if I had
something to g...
256
00:08:33,830 --> 00:08:35,230
You know what,
I do have something.
257
00:08:35,232 --> 00:08:36,998
I have a bag
of nuts in my bag.
258
00:08:37,000 --> 00:08:38,400
Do you want
a bag of nuts?
259
00:08:38,402 --> 00:08:40,168
NICK:
Maybe she didn't hear you.
260
00:08:40,170 --> 00:08:41,870
You know, she's got
a lot of hair.
- Mm.
261
00:08:41,872 --> 00:08:43,838
And hair blocks sound.
262
00:08:43,840 --> 00:08:47,008
It happened when we were
dating all the time.
263
00:08:47,010 --> 00:08:48,643
Hey, did you get
a chance to read
264
00:08:48,645 --> 00:08:51,713
my Walking Dead
fan fiction yet?
265
00:08:51,715 --> 00:08:53,314
What'd you think?
266
00:08:55,584 --> 00:08:57,385
Well, here's
the good news, lad.
267
00:08:57,387 --> 00:08:58,553
We have a solution.
268
00:08:58,555 --> 00:09:00,688
It's God's gift to man.
269
00:09:00,690 --> 00:09:02,390
It's alcohol.
- I can't.
270
00:09:02,392 --> 00:09:05,226
We agreed to pretend-drink
so we could go out to dinner.
271
00:09:05,228 --> 00:09:06,728
Are you saying that
'cause you want me
272
00:09:06,730 --> 00:09:08,763
to go to jail for murder?
- No.
273
00:09:08,765 --> 00:09:10,165
No, 'cause I'm gonna murder you
274
00:09:10,167 --> 00:09:12,200
if you're pretend-drinking
on my bar crawl!
275
00:09:12,202 --> 00:09:14,335
And you're breaking my heart!
276
00:09:14,337 --> 00:09:15,603
You can't fight
277
00:09:15,605 --> 00:09:17,005
the crawl.
278
00:09:17,007 --> 00:09:18,373
It's like fighting a hurricane.
279
00:09:18,375 --> 00:09:19,607
You know what a hurricane is?
280
00:09:19,609 --> 00:09:20,909
Do you guys have those
over the pond?
281
00:09:20,911 --> 00:09:22,277
We don't, but I
know what it is.
282
00:09:22,279 --> 00:09:23,378
You guys don't have them?
- No.
283
00:09:23,380 --> 00:09:25,013
They're awful.
- Mm-hmm.
284
00:09:25,015 --> 00:09:26,581
It's like fighting one of those.
285
00:09:26,583 --> 00:09:29,050
And a hurricane
doesn't have fists,
286
00:09:29,052 --> 00:09:30,752
so just, bang, you lose!
287
00:09:30,754 --> 00:09:32,554
Let's drink.
Yeah, man.
288
00:09:32,556 --> 00:09:33,521
Yeah!
- USA!
289
00:09:33,523 --> 00:09:34,789
USA!
- Yeah!
- USA!
290
00:09:34,791 --> 00:09:35,957
USA!
- (whoops)
291
00:09:35,959 --> 00:09:37,058
And also where
you're from!
292
00:09:37,060 --> 00:09:39,094
Mmm.
- To show respect.
293
00:09:40,362 --> 00:09:42,297
Well, happy V-Day to me.
294
00:09:42,299 --> 00:09:43,965
Fawn and I are
on the rocks.
295
00:09:43,967 --> 00:09:45,967
By the way, a pun that
would have killed
296
00:09:45,969 --> 00:09:47,302
at last week's
geologist ball.
297
00:09:47,304 --> 00:09:49,737
(whispering):
Let's murder her.
298
00:09:49,739 --> 00:09:50,905
What?!
299
00:09:50,907 --> 00:09:52,140
I want chicken wings.
300
00:09:52,142 --> 00:09:53,274
I know.
301
00:09:53,276 --> 00:09:54,542
How many drinks you had tonight?
302
00:09:54,544 --> 00:09:57,745
Nine plus three minus one.
303
00:09:57,747 --> 00:09:59,547
Oh, no. That's...
304
00:09:59,549 --> 00:10:01,316
Because I'm gonna
outdrink Miller.
305
00:10:01,318 --> 00:10:02,951
You are gonna outdrink Miller?
No one outdrinks Miller.
306
00:10:02,953 --> 00:10:04,919
I do.
I guarantee you, you don't.
307
00:10:04,921 --> 00:10:06,621
You don't know me.
308
00:10:06,623 --> 00:10:08,590
Cece, Nick just
got dumped, okay?
309
00:10:08,592 --> 00:10:11,159
He has a depth of
anger and sadness
310
00:10:11,161 --> 00:10:12,627
that rests
between his eyes,
311
00:10:12,629 --> 00:10:14,662
and he can drink forever
and ever and ever.
312
00:10:14,664 --> 00:10:16,397
You'll lose every time.
313
00:10:16,399 --> 00:10:17,966
Hey, it's my business partner
314
00:10:17,968 --> 00:10:19,434
that I was telling
you about-- Schmidt!
315
00:10:19,436 --> 00:10:22,237
ALL:
Schmidt!
316
00:10:22,239 --> 00:10:24,439
Nick, who are
all these people?
These are the crawlers.
317
00:10:24,441 --> 00:10:28,009
The single, the lonely,
the close-talkers,
318
00:10:28,011 --> 00:10:31,079
the shockingly pale,
the stank-mouths,
319
00:10:31,081 --> 00:10:32,914
fat boys in the back...
(whoops twice)
320
00:10:32,916 --> 00:10:35,116
(crawlers whoop twice)
The chubby-fronts,
321
00:10:35,118 --> 00:10:36,518
the delusionally-okay-
with-themselves...
322
00:10:36,520 --> 00:10:39,487
but no one is alone tonight
because...
323
00:10:39,489 --> 00:10:41,122
ALL (chanting):
The crawl is for all!
324
00:10:41,124 --> 00:10:44,192
The crawl is for all!
The crawl is for all!
325
00:10:44,194 --> 00:10:45,793
I just want chicken wings.
326
00:10:45,795 --> 00:10:47,695
Oh, you're hammered, Cece.
327
00:10:50,933 --> 00:10:53,501
Hey.
- Hey, Jess,
I'm drinking fire.
328
00:10:53,503 --> 00:10:55,336
That seems dangerous.
- Mm...
329
00:10:55,338 --> 00:10:58,439
Um, I wanted to talk to you
about what you said before.
330
00:10:58,441 --> 00:11:00,675
What did I say?
I can't remember.
331
00:11:00,677 --> 00:11:03,144
You don't... you don't
remember what you said?
332
00:11:03,146 --> 00:11:05,346
No, I embraced the crawl.
333
00:11:06,182 --> 00:11:07,882
Oh.
334
00:11:07,884 --> 00:11:09,651
WINSTON and NICK:
¶ When it's cold outside... ¶
335
00:11:09,653 --> 00:11:11,786
That sounded...
that's where we're at.
336
00:11:11,788 --> 00:11:14,189
¶ I've got the month of May... ¶
337
00:11:14,191 --> 00:11:16,124
I'm up here.
- Good, okay,
I'm down here.
338
00:11:16,126 --> 00:11:18,026
Okay, let's do it, y'all.
check it out.
339
00:11:18,028 --> 00:11:20,028
¶ I guess ¶
340
00:11:20,030 --> 00:11:21,996
¶ You'd say ¶
341
00:11:21,998 --> 00:11:26,034
¶ What can make me
feel this way? ¶
342
00:11:26,036 --> 00:11:27,035
Here we go!
343
00:11:27,037 --> 00:11:28,636
¶ Bar crawl ¶
344
00:11:28,638 --> 00:11:30,471
¶ Bar crawl, bar crawl ¶
345
00:11:30,473 --> 00:11:33,741
¶ Talkin' 'bout bar crawl ¶
346
00:11:33,743 --> 00:11:35,743
¶ Bar crawl... ¶
(whooping)
347
00:11:35,745 --> 00:11:37,712
Where my altos at?
348
00:11:37,714 --> 00:11:39,347
Come on, now, don't be shy!
I see you!
349
00:11:39,349 --> 00:11:41,382
(boos, chuckles)
350
00:11:41,384 --> 00:11:42,517
Oh, man.
351
00:11:42,519 --> 00:11:44,552
NICK: And mic drop.
Who's next?
352
00:11:44,554 --> 00:11:46,387
No. What?!
- No.
353
00:11:46,389 --> 00:11:47,989
Damn it!
Are you following me?
354
00:11:47,991 --> 00:11:49,390
No, I'm not
following you, dude.
355
00:11:49,392 --> 00:11:50,992
Do you have any nicer,
sluttier friends?
356
00:11:50,994 --> 00:11:53,695
Yeah, I do, and I'm never
introducing them to you.
357
00:11:53,697 --> 00:11:55,530
That's messed up.
And they're real dirty.
358
00:11:55,532 --> 00:11:57,832
Aw!
- Can I have
a gimlet, please?
359
00:11:57,834 --> 00:11:59,434
I.D.?
- Seriously? Why?
360
00:11:59,436 --> 00:12:00,902
'Cause you ordered a dumb drink.
361
00:12:00,904 --> 00:12:03,071
(goofy laughing)
362
00:12:03,073 --> 00:12:04,539
(snickering)
363
00:12:04,541 --> 00:12:06,774
Oh...
364
00:12:06,776 --> 00:12:08,509
(woman sighs)
COACH: Ah.
365
00:12:08,511 --> 00:12:10,612
Thank you.
You have a Kansas license.
366
00:12:10,614 --> 00:12:12,013
Where I learned to drive,
367
00:12:12,015 --> 00:12:13,581
and I have an emotional
attachment to it,
368
00:12:13,583 --> 00:12:15,383
and I don't need
to explain that to you.
369
00:12:15,385 --> 00:12:17,518
No, you don't, but...
370
00:12:17,520 --> 00:12:19,520
You're from Kansas?
- Yup.
371
00:12:19,522 --> 00:12:21,556
Well, I'm from all over.
Army brat.
372
00:12:21,558 --> 00:12:22,523
Me, too.
373
00:12:22,525 --> 00:12:23,858
You are?
- Yes.
374
00:12:23,860 --> 00:12:25,426
Uh, you ever lived
in North Carolina?
375
00:12:25,428 --> 00:12:26,961
From 1989 to 1992.
376
00:12:26,963 --> 00:12:28,429
Moved there in '93.
- No.
377
00:12:28,431 --> 00:12:30,431
You ever live in Germany?
Dusseldorf in '96!
378
00:12:30,433 --> 00:12:32,267
Lived there in '97!
379
00:12:32,269 --> 00:12:34,202
That's so weird.
380
00:12:34,204 --> 00:12:37,772
So, we've, like, just missed
each other for our entire lives.
381
00:12:37,774 --> 00:12:41,042
And then we meet, like, three
times in a row in one night.
382
00:12:41,044 --> 00:12:43,411
(laughs)
- Seems a little weird.
383
00:12:43,413 --> 00:12:45,546
It's kind of like, uh...
384
00:12:45,548 --> 00:12:48,116
Fate?
- No.
385
00:12:48,118 --> 00:12:50,251
I know! I can't believe
I said that!
- Why did you say that?
386
00:12:50,253 --> 00:12:51,452
That is so cheesy.
Oh, I hate that!
387
00:12:51,454 --> 00:12:52,987
NICK:
Hey, Coach!
388
00:12:52,989 --> 00:12:54,722
Coach!
I don't know them.
389
00:12:54,724 --> 00:12:56,924
I got a female condom
if you need it, my man!
- (whoops)
390
00:12:56,926 --> 00:12:59,160
Don't hold this
against me, please.
391
00:12:59,162 --> 00:13:01,429
CECE (groans):
Oh, God.
392
00:13:01,431 --> 00:13:02,430
Here, Cece,
have some water.
393
00:13:02,432 --> 00:13:04,799
No, thank you. No.
394
00:13:04,801 --> 00:13:07,435
Valentine's Day just sucks.
395
00:13:07,437 --> 00:13:10,571
I don't know.
I kind of like it.
- Since when?
396
00:13:10,573 --> 00:13:12,674
Since a few years ago.
397
00:13:12,676 --> 00:13:15,143
Since three years ago,
to be exact.
398
00:13:15,145 --> 00:13:17,178
Oh, what happened three...?
399
00:13:17,180 --> 00:13:18,946
Oh.
400
00:13:18,948 --> 00:13:21,449
It was when you first
took a chance on me.
401
00:13:21,451 --> 00:13:23,418
And we humped
until the sun came out.
402
00:13:23,420 --> 00:13:25,620
Did all the things
that R. Kelly raps about.
403
00:13:25,622 --> 00:13:27,522
Yeah, I know. I was there.
404
00:13:27,524 --> 00:13:29,657
It was the best night
of my life,
405
00:13:29,659 --> 00:13:31,359
and ever since then,
406
00:13:31,361 --> 00:13:33,127
Valentine's Day has always
been my favorite holiday,
407
00:13:33,129 --> 00:13:34,662
and I hope
that you don't remember
408
00:13:34,664 --> 00:13:37,765
that I have said
any of these things tomorrow.
409
00:13:37,767 --> 00:13:39,967
Oh, it's gonna
happen again.
410
00:13:39,969 --> 00:13:41,669
It's gonna... Oh.
411
00:13:41,671 --> 00:13:42,970
It's gonna happen again.
412
00:13:42,972 --> 00:13:44,439
All right.
- Oh...
413
00:13:44,441 --> 00:13:45,873
(coughing)
414
00:13:45,875 --> 00:13:47,475
Somehow, this isn't repulsive.
415
00:13:47,477 --> 00:13:50,144
It's not great, but
it certainly isn't the worst.
416
00:13:50,146 --> 00:13:52,113
JESS:
I'm so sorry that I pretended
417
00:13:52,115 --> 00:13:53,614
not to hear you.
418
00:13:53,616 --> 00:13:55,783
It's just that...
I wasn't ready for it,
419
00:13:55,785 --> 00:13:57,485
and sometimes you mumble
with your accent,
420
00:13:57,487 --> 00:13:59,620
and I never fully
understand you.
421
00:13:59,622 --> 00:14:01,823
I'm sorry.
- I'm sorry.
422
00:14:01,825 --> 00:14:04,158
I asked you to move in with me
out of the blue.
423
00:14:04,160 --> 00:14:05,693
What kind of...
nutter does that?
424
00:14:05,695 --> 00:14:09,464
The craziest mother nutter
in the whole damn place!
425
00:14:09,466 --> 00:14:11,899
Ryan Geauxinue,
426
00:14:11,901 --> 00:14:14,235
will you move in with me?
427
00:14:14,237 --> 00:14:15,670
I have my own home.
428
00:14:15,672 --> 00:14:18,005
You live in a loft
with four guys and a urinal.
429
00:14:18,007 --> 00:14:19,173
Will you move in with me?
430
00:14:19,175 --> 00:14:21,509
Yes.
431
00:14:21,511 --> 00:14:22,810
Yes?
- Yes!
432
00:14:22,812 --> 00:14:24,145
Yes!
- Absolutely.
433
00:14:24,147 --> 00:14:25,146
Yes!
- Yes!
434
00:14:25,148 --> 00:14:26,214
(giggles)
435
00:14:26,216 --> 00:14:28,349
NICK:
Home base!
- (groans)
436
00:14:28,351 --> 00:14:31,052
Barkeep, bring us beer.
437
00:14:31,054 --> 00:14:32,720
If you call me "barkeep"
one more time,
438
00:14:32,722 --> 00:14:34,188
I'm shutting this bitch down.
439
00:14:34,190 --> 00:14:36,557
Mike, I love you
because you're gay...
440
00:14:36,559 --> 00:14:38,393
and 'cause you're dangerous.
441
00:14:38,395 --> 00:14:40,395
I can't believe I used
to have a crush on you.
442
00:14:40,397 --> 00:14:41,863
(groans)
443
00:14:41,865 --> 00:14:44,165
Hey, man. How's it going?
444
00:14:44,167 --> 00:14:45,199
I'm not hooking up tonight.
445
00:14:45,201 --> 00:14:46,401
I met one girl.
446
00:14:46,403 --> 00:14:47,835
Several times.
447
00:14:47,837 --> 00:14:49,203
She's pretty much perfect.
448
00:14:49,205 --> 00:14:50,938
Nice. Where's she at?
449
00:14:50,940 --> 00:14:52,206
I ditched her, dude.
450
00:14:52,208 --> 00:14:53,508
She's, like,
relationship material.
451
00:14:53,510 --> 00:14:55,009
That's not what
I'm looking for tonight.
452
00:14:55,011 --> 00:14:56,844
Really?
Yeah, I want something easy.
453
00:14:56,846 --> 00:14:58,446
Something easy?
Like Sunday morning.
454
00:14:58,448 --> 00:14:59,614
Like Sunday morning.
Know what I'm saying?
455
00:14:59,616 --> 00:15:01,015
I know what you're saying.
456
00:15:01,017 --> 00:15:02,383
That bitch is a Monday.
457
00:15:02,385 --> 00:15:03,718
Know what I'm saying?
You know what's funny?
458
00:15:03,720 --> 00:15:05,186
I got something
just for that.
459
00:15:05,188 --> 00:15:07,355
You're gonna love it.
Here it is.
460
00:15:07,357 --> 00:15:09,090
I can't wait.
Give it to me right...
461
00:15:09,092 --> 00:15:11,626
Yo!
- Go get that girl, dude.
462
00:15:11,628 --> 00:15:13,194
(whining): I don't even
know where she is.
463
00:15:13,196 --> 00:15:14,862
I didn't hit you that hard.
464
00:15:14,864 --> 00:15:16,631
Hey.
- (sighs)
465
00:15:16,633 --> 00:15:20,101
This, uh, Schmidt's
jacket you're wearing?
466
00:15:20,103 --> 00:15:21,436
Yeah.
467
00:15:21,438 --> 00:15:22,637
Not to be a nosy buddy,
468
00:15:22,639 --> 00:15:24,238
but sparks are flying
469
00:15:24,240 --> 00:15:26,707
like the Wright brothers
between you two.
470
00:15:26,709 --> 00:15:28,142
And I would know.
471
00:15:28,144 --> 00:15:30,778
I have their biography
here in my backpack.
472
00:15:30,780 --> 00:15:33,915
I care about Schmidt,
but just as a friend, all right?
473
00:15:33,917 --> 00:15:35,716
Look me in the eyes,
474
00:15:35,718 --> 00:15:37,852
and tell me you don't
have feelings for Schmidt.
475
00:15:41,924 --> 00:15:44,559
I don't have feelings for him.
476
00:15:44,561 --> 00:15:46,127
Dude, you are nowhere
near my eyes.
477
00:15:46,129 --> 00:15:47,762
Nobody hit on me.
I'm taken.
- Hey, baby.
478
00:15:47,764 --> 00:15:49,564
Don't talk to me.
I'm a councilwoman.
479
00:15:49,566 --> 00:15:50,865
Schmidt?
480
00:15:51,767 --> 00:15:53,000
Did the whole crawl to find you.
481
00:15:53,002 --> 00:15:54,402
I'm cold, I'm tired, I'm sober.
482
00:15:54,404 --> 00:15:56,637
I'm wearing my strapless bra
like a belt.
483
00:15:56,639 --> 00:15:58,072
But I know what I want.
484
00:15:59,241 --> 00:16:00,308
I want you.
485
00:16:00,310 --> 00:16:02,210
I want you to be my boyfriend.
486
00:16:03,278 --> 00:16:05,613
As much as I want
a commuter lane
487
00:16:05,615 --> 00:16:07,849
to Costa Mesa!
(crowd whooping)
488
00:16:07,851 --> 00:16:09,750
Vote Moscato!
489
00:16:09,752 --> 00:16:12,019
(crowd cheering)
490
00:16:15,190 --> 00:16:17,158
What?
- They're kissing.
491
00:16:17,160 --> 00:16:19,494
I thought maybe you were gonna
say something like, "No,"
492
00:16:19,496 --> 00:16:21,996
or like, "I miss him
so much now," 'cause...
493
00:16:21,998 --> 00:16:23,998
Last call!
Ack!
494
00:16:24,000 --> 00:16:26,033
We got one more bar
on the crawl!
495
00:16:26,035 --> 00:16:28,169
We have to finish the smile!
496
00:16:28,171 --> 00:16:29,537
You're never,
ever gonna make it.
497
00:16:29,539 --> 00:16:30,872
And I'm never
gonna ride a Jet Ski
498
00:16:30,874 --> 00:16:32,340
with Tom Colicchio on my back,
499
00:16:32,342 --> 00:16:34,609
so sometimes dreams
just don't come true.
500
00:16:34,611 --> 00:16:36,277
(shouting):
I'm sorry about that guy Galecky
501
00:16:36,279 --> 00:16:38,312
not hugging you from behind
in the water
502
00:16:38,314 --> 00:16:39,280
on a motorized thing!
503
00:16:39,282 --> 00:16:40,815
I'm sorry!
504
00:16:40,817 --> 00:16:43,384
We will finish
what we have started!
505
00:16:43,386 --> 00:16:44,819
(cheering)
Yay!
506
00:16:44,821 --> 00:16:46,687
We will feast on the spoils
507
00:16:46,689 --> 00:16:50,057
of this night
for a thousand moons!
508
00:16:50,059 --> 00:16:51,959
In the name of love and booze!
509
00:16:51,961 --> 00:16:53,327
(crawlers cheering)
510
00:16:53,329 --> 00:16:56,330
Oh, no. My crush is back.
511
00:16:56,332 --> 00:16:58,432
I hate myself.
512
00:16:59,835 --> 00:17:01,135
(cell phone vibrating)
513
00:17:01,137 --> 00:17:02,503
Oh, this person will
not stop texting me.
514
00:17:02,505 --> 00:17:04,171
Where is it?
515
00:17:04,173 --> 00:17:06,040
Sorry.
516
00:17:06,042 --> 00:17:08,242
Oh, it's an e-mail
from Wellington Prep.
517
00:17:08,244 --> 00:17:10,478
You do realize we were
just about to have sex, right?
518
00:17:10,480 --> 00:17:13,214
Say something to get back
in the mood. Say "raccoon."
519
00:17:13,216 --> 00:17:15,082
They're offering me
the job of headmaster.
520
00:17:15,084 --> 00:17:16,751
In England?
521
00:17:18,887 --> 00:17:20,955
Raccoon?
522
00:17:24,726 --> 00:17:26,694
So you'd be the headmaster?
Headmaster.
523
00:17:26,696 --> 00:17:28,829
Of Wellington?
Of Wellington.
524
00:17:28,831 --> 00:17:30,431
(sighs):
Headmaster.
525
00:17:30,433 --> 00:17:34,302
Jess... look at me.
526
00:17:35,437 --> 00:17:36,737
I'm not gonna take it.
527
00:17:36,739 --> 00:17:37,939
Wellington's
not even that great.
528
00:17:37,941 --> 00:17:39,173
You have
their current headmaster
529
00:17:39,175 --> 00:17:41,175
as your emergency contact.
530
00:17:41,177 --> 00:17:43,110
Okay, it's heaven on Earth.
531
00:17:43,112 --> 00:17:44,946
And I love it.
532
00:17:44,948 --> 00:17:46,414
But I love you more.
533
00:17:46,416 --> 00:17:48,082
Well, I love you,
which is why I can't
534
00:17:48,084 --> 00:17:49,984
let you pass up
this opportunity.
535
00:17:51,119 --> 00:17:54,255
If we were ready
to live in the same place,
536
00:17:54,257 --> 00:17:58,392
then we should be ready
to live 5,000 miles apart.
537
00:17:58,394 --> 00:18:00,428
Yeah, I suppose, but...
Well, I'll call you every night
538
00:18:00,430 --> 00:18:01,596
after work.
It'll only be,
539
00:18:01,598 --> 00:18:03,297
like, midnight your time.
540
00:18:03,299 --> 00:18:05,366
I could learn to stay up late.
Maybe I should try cocaine!
541
00:18:05,368 --> 00:18:07,301
Yeah! Or coffee!
- That, too.
542
00:18:07,303 --> 00:18:08,436
And I'll come and visit.
543
00:18:08,438 --> 00:18:09,737
It's only, like,
an 11-hour flight.
544
00:18:09,739 --> 00:18:11,305
And then a four-hour
drive to Wellington.
545
00:18:11,307 --> 00:18:12,940
That's so long!
546
00:18:12,942 --> 00:18:16,310
Which is great... 'cause
I can catch up on podcasts.
547
00:18:16,312 --> 00:18:18,613
We can do this!
548
00:18:20,882 --> 00:18:23,084
We can do this
long distance, right?
549
00:18:23,086 --> 00:18:25,119
Right.
550
00:18:26,288 --> 00:18:28,222
NICK (in distance):
This is our revolution!
551
00:18:28,224 --> 00:18:29,724
(crowd cheering outside)
552
00:18:29,726 --> 00:18:32,460
When I say "bar,"
you say...
553
00:18:32,462 --> 00:18:33,761
ALL: Crawl!
- Bar!
554
00:18:33,763 --> 00:18:35,262
Crawl!
555
00:18:35,264 --> 00:18:37,999
Jess, are you guys
coming or what?
556
00:18:40,402 --> 00:18:41,769
Hi.
557
00:18:41,771 --> 00:18:43,671
May!
558
00:18:43,673 --> 00:18:45,172
May!
559
00:18:45,174 --> 00:18:46,507
Hey.
560
00:18:46,509 --> 00:18:48,009
You again.
- Yeah.
561
00:18:48,011 --> 00:18:49,410
Me again.
562
00:18:49,412 --> 00:18:51,278
Look, um,
I'm sorry about earlier.
563
00:18:51,280 --> 00:18:52,847
I just, I-I really didn't plan
564
00:18:52,849 --> 00:18:55,282
on-on meeting somebody
so great tonight, you know?
565
00:18:55,284 --> 00:18:58,152
You messed everything up!
'Cause you're, like, awesome
566
00:18:58,154 --> 00:18:59,987
and that sucks because it's
like, that's not what I want.
567
00:18:59,989 --> 00:19:02,123
And you're pretty,
which is a bummer.
568
00:19:02,125 --> 00:19:04,191
'Cause it's like, damn!
She fine, but it's like,
569
00:19:04,193 --> 00:19:06,494
at the same time, I'm like,
I don't need this in my life.
570
00:19:06,496 --> 00:19:08,763
You wear a leather jacket...
I'm sorry.
I'm just confused.
571
00:19:08,765 --> 00:19:10,831
Are you trying to say
something nice right now?
572
00:19:10,833 --> 00:19:13,100
Yes. I am.
573
00:19:13,102 --> 00:19:15,336
And I'm terrible at it.
574
00:19:15,338 --> 00:19:17,605
Is there any way I could get,
I ca... I, um...
575
00:19:17,607 --> 00:19:19,707
I could get your number maybe?
576
00:19:23,211 --> 00:19:24,679
(coughing)
577
00:19:24,681 --> 00:19:26,113
Aw... (laughs)
578
00:19:26,115 --> 00:19:28,115
A long number.
579
00:19:28,117 --> 00:19:30,685
What the hell is this?
Is this your e-mail address?
580
00:19:30,687 --> 00:19:33,821
Write a good e-mail,
and I'll go out with you.
581
00:19:33,823 --> 00:19:36,724
What?
- I'm talking
full sentences.
582
00:19:36,726 --> 00:19:38,192
I'm talking no typos.
583
00:19:38,194 --> 00:19:40,161
No pictures. No pictures.
584
00:19:40,163 --> 00:19:42,229
God, you are gonna make this
really hard for me, huh?
585
00:19:42,231 --> 00:19:43,531
Yes.
586
00:19:43,533 --> 00:19:45,299
Aw...
587
00:19:46,168 --> 00:19:48,936
You smell good.
588
00:19:50,872 --> 00:19:52,073
Doug's Ale House!
589
00:19:52,075 --> 00:19:54,041
The tip of the smile!
590
00:19:54,043 --> 00:19:55,676
The crawl is complete!
(crowd cheering)
591
00:19:55,678 --> 00:19:56,877
Yeah!
592
00:19:56,879 --> 00:19:58,345
Yes!
593
00:19:58,347 --> 00:20:00,147
Yes! Get in!
594
00:20:00,149 --> 00:20:02,083
(cheering continues)
595
00:20:07,989 --> 00:20:09,857
Hey.
Hey.
596
00:20:09,859 --> 00:20:12,593
Everything okay?
I'd spent a long time
on the crawl,
597
00:20:12,595 --> 00:20:14,895
and now that it's over,
it's just a natural sadness.
598
00:20:14,897 --> 00:20:16,997
It's just gonna take a minute.
Just go on in. It's fine.
599
00:20:16,999 --> 00:20:20,000
What's the holdup?
Nick's cracking a little bit.
600
00:20:20,002 --> 00:20:21,168
Everybody, relax, okay?
601
00:20:21,170 --> 00:20:23,270
It's just the crawl's over.
602
00:20:23,272 --> 00:20:25,473
Kai is over...
603
00:20:26,908 --> 00:20:28,275
I got nothing to do.
604
00:20:28,277 --> 00:20:29,610
That's it. I'm not cracking.
605
00:20:29,612 --> 00:20:32,780
I just have nothing to do.
606
00:20:32,782 --> 00:20:35,850
Come on! Of course,
you have so much to do.
607
00:20:35,852 --> 00:20:37,017
Nick, we're
business partners, man.
608
00:20:37,019 --> 00:20:38,419
We're teammates.
609
00:20:38,421 --> 00:20:40,287
You're a smart
and talented guy.
610
00:20:40,289 --> 00:20:42,923
And tonight we found out
that you have a weird,
611
00:20:42,925 --> 00:20:44,759
Manson-esque charisma.
612
00:20:46,261 --> 00:20:48,095
You should make more maps, man.
That's what you should do.
613
00:20:48,097 --> 00:20:49,396
You're my idea man!
614
00:20:49,398 --> 00:20:50,898
Thank you, guys.
Thank you for saying
615
00:20:50,900 --> 00:20:53,300
all this nice stuff.
I love you guys.
616
00:20:56,772 --> 00:20:59,039
It's time to go inside.
We got a crawl to finish.
617
00:20:59,041 --> 00:21:00,074
Yeah, we got a crawl to finish.
618
00:21:00,076 --> 00:21:01,242
Now, out of my way!
619
00:21:01,244 --> 00:21:02,610
I'm getting another drink!
620
00:21:02,612 --> 00:21:04,345
I can't let you in.
621
00:21:05,480 --> 00:21:07,448
You're not wearing shoes.
622
00:21:08,250 --> 00:21:09,950
Where are your shoes, Nick?
623
00:21:09,952 --> 00:21:11,819
Honestly, I think I threw them
at a squirrel.
624
00:21:11,821 --> 00:21:13,053
Everybody's waiting for you.
625
00:21:13,055 --> 00:21:13,988
I can't go into the bar.
626
00:21:13,990 --> 00:21:15,289
I don't have shoes on.
627
00:21:15,291 --> 00:21:16,824
Why don't you have
shoes on, Nicolas?
628
00:21:16,826 --> 00:21:18,159
He threw them at
a squirrel again.
629
00:21:18,161 --> 00:21:19,493
My map is just a deformed
smile now.
630
00:21:19,495 --> 00:21:21,395
I didn't complete it.
631
00:21:21,397 --> 00:21:23,430
Or is it...
632
00:21:23,432 --> 00:21:25,232
a goatee face?
633
00:21:25,234 --> 00:21:27,501
What bar is that?
What bar is that?
634
00:21:27,503 --> 00:21:29,336
(chuckles)
I'm glad you asked.
635
00:21:29,338 --> 00:21:30,938
Welcome to Winston's bar.
636
00:21:30,940 --> 00:21:32,740
Happy Valentine's Day,
everybody.
637
00:21:32,742 --> 00:21:35,810
Captioned by
Media Access Group at WGBH
access.wgbh.org
638
00:21:35,812 --> 00:21:37,812
COACH: You're like the black
Mary Poppins!
639
00:21:37,814 --> 00:21:39,046
WINSTON: That's right!