1 00:00:02,060 --> 00:00:04,420 Business at Rent A Swag 2 00:00:02,060 --> 00:00:04,420 could not be better. 3 00:00:04,490 --> 00:00:06,430 Yesterday, Jaden Smith 4 00:00:04,490 --> 00:00:06,430 came in, and he was like... 5 00:00:06,490 --> 00:00:10,060 "Look. I want to quit 6 00:00:06,490 --> 00:00:10,060 the music/acting business 7 00:00:06,490 --> 00:00:10,060 and work here with you." 8 00:00:10,200 --> 00:00:11,190 And I was like, 9 00:00:11,270 --> 00:00:13,430 "Jaden, be serious. 10 00:00:11,270 --> 00:00:13,430 The world needs you. 11 00:00:11,270 --> 00:00:13,430 You have a gift." 12 00:00:13,500 --> 00:00:15,800 Ever since my client 13 00:00:13,500 --> 00:00:15,800 opened his store 14 00:00:13,500 --> 00:00:15,800 across the street, 15 00:00:15,870 --> 00:00:19,530 your sales have plummeted. 16 00:00:15,870 --> 00:00:19,530 It's only a matter of time 17 00:00:15,870 --> 00:00:19,530 before you're out of business. 18 00:00:20,410 --> 00:00:22,600 But my client has had 19 00:00:20,410 --> 00:00:22,600 a moment of weakness... 20 00:00:22,680 --> 00:00:25,150 Something he referred 21 00:00:22,680 --> 00:00:25,150 to as "sympathy." 22 00:00:26,280 --> 00:00:27,580 He's made you a final offer. 23 00:00:27,650 --> 00:00:30,380 $40,000 for Rent A Swag 24 00:00:27,650 --> 00:00:30,380 and all of its contents. 25 00:00:30,450 --> 00:00:31,710 I suggest you take it. 26 00:00:31,820 --> 00:00:34,450 Well, I've heard all 27 00:00:31,820 --> 00:00:34,450 the facts and it's pretty 28 00:00:31,820 --> 00:00:34,450 obvious what I have to do. 29 00:00:35,420 --> 00:00:36,650 Get a big old mug 30 00:00:35,420 --> 00:00:36,650 of hot chocolate, 31 00:00:36,720 --> 00:00:38,720 put on my thinking PJs, 32 00:00:36,720 --> 00:00:38,720 and get back to you. 33 00:00:39,030 --> 00:00:40,860 The offer's valid 34 00:00:39,030 --> 00:00:40,860 for 48 hours. 35 00:00:41,730 --> 00:00:44,060 We would also be 36 00:00:41,730 --> 00:00:44,060 interested in acquiring 37 00:00:41,730 --> 00:00:44,060 your thinking PJs. 38 00:00:44,430 --> 00:00:47,270 Listen to me very carefully. 39 00:00:47,340 --> 00:00:50,500 No matter what happens, 40 00:00:47,340 --> 00:00:50,500 you will never 41 00:00:50,740 --> 00:00:55,510 acquire my thinking PJs 42 00:00:50,740 --> 00:00:55,510 or my YouTube blazer. 43 00:00:56,810 --> 00:00:59,250 Non-negotiable. 44 00:01:20,700 --> 00:01:21,930 Sorry. 45 00:01:22,000 --> 00:01:23,530 Larry, everyone else 46 00:01:22,000 --> 00:01:23,530 was able to make it 47 00:01:23,600 --> 00:01:24,700 to the committee 48 00:01:23,600 --> 00:01:24,700 meeting on time. 49 00:01:24,770 --> 00:01:26,240 What's your excuse? 50 00:01:24,770 --> 00:01:26,240 I was voting for you 51 00:01:26,310 --> 00:01:29,570 in the recall election. 52 00:01:26,310 --> 00:01:29,570 Lots of people wearing 53 00:01:26,310 --> 00:01:29,570 Leslie Knope buttons. 54 00:01:29,640 --> 00:01:30,740 La-la-la... 55 00:01:30,810 --> 00:01:33,940 No discussion about 56 00:01:30,810 --> 00:01:33,940 the recall election until 57 00:01:30,810 --> 00:01:33,940 the polls close at 8:00. 58 00:01:34,180 --> 00:01:35,840 Let's focus on 59 00:01:34,180 --> 00:01:35,840 what we can control. 60 00:01:35,980 --> 00:01:38,920 In 24 hours, we are going 61 00:01:35,980 --> 00:01:38,920 to transform City Hall 62 00:01:38,990 --> 00:01:41,080 into the best haunted house 63 00:01:38,990 --> 00:01:41,080 Pawnee has ever seen. 64 00:01:41,160 --> 00:01:43,450 There's been a mistake. 65 00:01:41,160 --> 00:01:43,450 This says that I'm in charge 66 00:01:43,520 --> 00:01:45,390 of the "Silly Skeleton Room." 67 00:01:45,460 --> 00:01:48,090 When, really, 68 00:01:45,460 --> 00:01:48,090 it should say the 69 00:01:45,460 --> 00:01:48,090 "Undead Serial Killer Room." 70 00:01:48,660 --> 00:01:50,000 Who do I talk to 71 00:01:48,660 --> 00:01:50,000 about changing this? 72 00:01:50,130 --> 00:01:53,230 It's Recall Day. 73 00:01:50,130 --> 00:01:53,230 I've made my case. 74 00:01:53,300 --> 00:01:54,890 And the latest polls 75 00:01:53,300 --> 00:01:54,890 have it as a dead heat. 76 00:01:54,970 --> 00:01:56,870 So, there's nothing 77 00:01:54,970 --> 00:01:56,870 left to do but wait. 78 00:01:57,240 --> 00:02:01,040 But I'm fine. I mean, 79 00:01:57,240 --> 00:02:01,040 I've got stuff to do. 80 00:01:57,240 --> 00:02:01,040 I'm planning a haunted house. 81 00:02:01,280 --> 00:02:05,010 Plus... Um... 82 00:02:01,280 --> 00:02:05,010 It's Kevin Pollak's birthday. 83 00:02:05,950 --> 00:02:07,540 That's something 84 00:02:05,950 --> 00:02:07,540 to focus on today. 85 00:02:07,780 --> 00:02:10,150 Who cares about 86 00:02:07,780 --> 00:02:10,150 the recall? 87 00:02:07,780 --> 00:02:10,150 It's Kevin's day. 88 00:02:11,790 --> 00:02:14,280 I don't know what to do. 89 00:02:11,790 --> 00:02:14,280 I could take the offer 90 00:02:11,790 --> 00:02:14,280 and break even, 91 00:02:14,360 --> 00:02:16,480 but I've come so far. 92 00:02:16,560 --> 00:02:19,650 Ron. Can you put some more 93 00:02:16,560 --> 00:02:19,650 tiny marshmallows 94 00:02:16,560 --> 00:02:19,650 in my hot "chocky"? 95 00:02:22,000 --> 00:02:23,020 Thank you. 96 00:02:23,100 --> 00:02:25,660 If there was something 97 00:02:23,100 --> 00:02:25,660 I could do for you, I would. 98 00:02:25,800 --> 00:02:28,960 Maybe you should try 99 00:02:25,800 --> 00:02:28,960 taking a walk. 100 00:02:25,800 --> 00:02:28,960 Out of my office. 101 00:02:31,240 --> 00:02:32,970 Ron! You're in bloosh! 102 00:02:33,570 --> 00:02:37,570 What? Ron's in bloosh? 103 00:02:33,570 --> 00:02:37,570 Ron is in bloosh. 104 00:02:39,210 --> 00:02:40,410 What is bloosh? 105 00:02:40,650 --> 00:02:43,480 bloosh is a weekly 106 00:02:40,650 --> 00:02:43,480 lifestyle e-mail 107 00:02:40,650 --> 00:02:43,480 written by Annabel Porter. 108 00:02:43,650 --> 00:02:45,550 She used to be the face 109 00:02:43,650 --> 00:02:45,550 of the Eagleton phone book. 110 00:02:45,920 --> 00:02:48,190 Then, she moved to 111 00:02:45,920 --> 00:02:48,190 Hollywood to pursue 112 00:02:45,920 --> 00:02:48,190 her dream of becoming 113 00:02:48,260 --> 00:02:49,880 friends with a bunch 114 00:02:48,260 --> 00:02:49,880 of celebrities. 115 00:02:49,960 --> 00:02:52,320 Then, she moved back 116 00:02:49,960 --> 00:02:52,320 to become a lifestyle guru. 117 00:02:52,560 --> 00:02:55,690 She's legit. She spent four 118 00:02:52,560 --> 00:02:55,690 months living in Kate 119 00:02:52,560 --> 00:02:55,690 Bosworth's pool house. 120 00:02:55,930 --> 00:03:00,600 "A Ron Swanson designed 121 00:02:55,930 --> 00:03:00,600 chair is the must-have 122 00:02:55,930 --> 00:03:00,600 item of the season, 123 00:03:00,670 --> 00:03:04,160 "along with red quinoa, 124 00:03:00,670 --> 00:03:04,160 wind therapy, 125 00:03:00,670 --> 00:03:04,160 and buying an island." 126 00:03:04,410 --> 00:03:07,030 Annabel says that 127 00:03:04,410 --> 00:03:07,030 buying an island 128 00:03:04,410 --> 00:03:07,030 is the only real way 129 00:03:07,110 --> 00:03:09,670 to know that your 130 00:03:07,110 --> 00:03:09,670 goji berry farm 131 00:03:07,110 --> 00:03:09,670 is pesticide free. 132 00:03:09,910 --> 00:03:12,900 I've been trying 133 00:03:09,910 --> 00:03:12,900 to get Rent A Swag 134 00:03:09,910 --> 00:03:12,900 in bloosh for months. 135 00:03:13,010 --> 00:03:14,810 And now that you got in, 136 00:03:13,010 --> 00:03:14,810 I can get in, too. 137 00:03:14,920 --> 00:03:16,280 Congratulations, Ron. 138 00:03:14,920 --> 00:03:16,280 We did it. 139 00:03:16,350 --> 00:03:17,480 Someone's getting 140 00:03:16,350 --> 00:03:17,480 a new leather jacket. 141 00:03:17,750 --> 00:03:19,550 I don't want 142 00:03:17,750 --> 00:03:19,550 a leather jacket. 143 00:03:19,690 --> 00:03:22,560 It's for me. 144 00:03:19,690 --> 00:03:22,560 This is a great day! 145 00:03:22,890 --> 00:03:25,830 Ron's in bloosh! 146 00:03:25,890 --> 00:03:27,620 What? 147 00:03:25,890 --> 00:03:27,620 Ron's in bloosh! 148 00:03:27,700 --> 00:03:29,490 Do it! 149 00:03:27,700 --> 00:03:29,490 Ron's in bloosh! 150 00:03:32,330 --> 00:03:35,770 April, you seem depressed. 151 00:03:32,330 --> 00:03:35,770 And I would know. 152 00:03:35,870 --> 00:03:38,600 I spent most of last year 153 00:03:35,870 --> 00:03:38,600 being treated by 154 00:03:35,870 --> 00:03:38,600 Dr. Richard Nygard 155 00:03:38,870 --> 00:03:40,030 for my own 156 00:03:38,870 --> 00:03:40,030 emotional problems. 157 00:03:40,310 --> 00:03:42,070 Yeah, I just miss Andy. 158 00:03:42,210 --> 00:03:45,080 Halloween was, like, 159 00:03:42,210 --> 00:03:45,080 kind of our thing. 160 00:03:45,550 --> 00:03:48,140 Every year, we would 161 00:03:45,550 --> 00:03:48,140 dress up like demons 162 00:03:45,550 --> 00:03:48,140 and egg Larry's house. 163 00:03:48,320 --> 00:03:49,870 That was you? 164 00:03:48,320 --> 00:03:49,870 Larry, please. 165 00:03:50,020 --> 00:03:51,540 We're having 166 00:03:50,020 --> 00:03:51,540 a private conversation. 167 00:03:51,620 --> 00:03:53,550 Well, I'd like to make 168 00:03:51,620 --> 00:03:53,550 Halloween fun for you. 169 00:03:54,120 --> 00:03:56,090 Like Andy would have. 170 00:03:54,120 --> 00:03:56,090 Starting right now. 171 00:03:56,160 --> 00:03:57,820 With scary, 172 00:03:56,160 --> 00:03:57,820 scary monster claws! 173 00:03:58,530 --> 00:04:01,590 Okay, people, 174 00:03:58,530 --> 00:04:01,590 the grand opening 175 00:03:58,530 --> 00:04:01,590 is in 20 hours. 176 00:04:01,800 --> 00:04:04,160 Larry, you had 177 00:04:01,800 --> 00:04:04,160 the easiest job. 178 00:04:04,270 --> 00:04:06,460 Two triangles and a tooth. 179 00:04:04,270 --> 00:04:06,460 Nobody wants 180 00:04:06,530 --> 00:04:08,330 Gengurch-family-themed 181 00:04:06,530 --> 00:04:08,330 jack-o-lanterns. 182 00:04:08,500 --> 00:04:11,270 Gail likes them. 183 00:04:08,500 --> 00:04:11,270 Is any of this even good? 184 00:04:11,340 --> 00:04:13,710 Why didn't we call it 185 00:04:11,340 --> 00:04:13,710 City Halloween? 186 00:04:13,770 --> 00:04:15,800 Okay. We need to 187 00:04:13,770 --> 00:04:15,800 change every single banner. 188 00:04:15,880 --> 00:04:17,570 Leslie's been holding it 189 00:04:15,880 --> 00:04:17,570 together pretty well. 190 00:04:17,650 --> 00:04:19,550 But today is when 191 00:04:17,650 --> 00:04:19,550 she needs us the most. 192 00:04:19,750 --> 00:04:23,010 That's why we formed 193 00:04:19,750 --> 00:04:23,010 the Leslie Knope 194 00:04:19,750 --> 00:04:23,010 Emotional Support Task Force. 195 00:04:23,220 --> 00:04:26,150 Anything she could 196 00:04:23,220 --> 00:04:26,150 possibly need to get her 197 00:04:23,220 --> 00:04:26,150 through these final hours, 198 00:04:26,290 --> 00:04:27,760 we've got it covered. 199 00:04:26,290 --> 00:04:27,760 Mmm-hmm. 200 00:04:27,820 --> 00:04:31,590 Back rubs. YouTube videos 201 00:04:27,820 --> 00:04:31,590 of turtles and birds 202 00:04:27,820 --> 00:04:31,590 becoming friends. 203 00:04:31,660 --> 00:04:35,560 A poster announcing 204 00:04:31,660 --> 00:04:35,560 the new Lilith Fair concert. 205 00:04:35,630 --> 00:04:37,330 It's fake, 206 00:04:35,630 --> 00:04:37,330 but it will buy us an hour. 207 00:04:37,400 --> 00:04:41,340 We even have a secret 208 00:04:37,400 --> 00:04:41,340 hand signal in case 209 00:04:37,400 --> 00:04:41,340 we think she needs help. 210 00:04:42,070 --> 00:04:44,060 It's loosely based on 211 00:04:42,070 --> 00:04:44,060 the Klingon greeting salute. 212 00:04:44,310 --> 00:04:47,280 I just learned that. 213 00:04:44,310 --> 00:04:47,280 And if I had known, 214 00:04:44,310 --> 00:04:47,280 I would not have agreed to it. 215 00:04:48,140 --> 00:04:49,240 Uh... Hey, Leslie? 216 00:04:49,310 --> 00:04:52,250 How about, instead of 217 00:04:49,310 --> 00:04:52,250 slightly changing 218 00:04:49,310 --> 00:04:52,250 a lot of banners, 219 00:04:52,350 --> 00:04:55,340 we paint our toenails 220 00:04:52,350 --> 00:04:55,340 to look like pumpkins? 221 00:04:55,480 --> 00:04:59,420 Fun! Ann, you're a genius. 222 00:04:55,480 --> 00:04:59,420 Your brain is almost 223 00:04:55,480 --> 00:04:59,420 as perfect as your face. 224 00:04:59,550 --> 00:05:00,610 Oh. 225 00:05:01,760 --> 00:05:04,450 Hey, Ron, baby. 226 00:05:01,760 --> 00:05:04,450 What are the hot deets 227 00:05:01,760 --> 00:05:04,450 on bloosh? 228 00:05:05,060 --> 00:05:07,090 Start over 229 00:05:05,060 --> 00:05:07,090 and speak differently. 230 00:05:07,160 --> 00:05:08,690 Sorry. Did you 231 00:05:07,160 --> 00:05:08,690 call that PR guy? 232 00:05:08,760 --> 00:05:10,990 What's the latest news? 233 00:05:08,760 --> 00:05:10,990 Apparently, 234 00:05:08,760 --> 00:05:10,990 Joan Callamezzo 235 00:05:11,070 --> 00:05:15,130 wants me to go on Pawnee Today 236 00:05:11,070 --> 00:05:15,130 to discuss my chairs 237 00:05:11,070 --> 00:05:15,130 with this Porter woman. 238 00:05:15,670 --> 00:05:16,660 I said no. 239 00:05:16,740 --> 00:05:19,210 Ron, you said if there 240 00:05:16,740 --> 00:05:19,210 were something you could do 241 00:05:16,740 --> 00:05:19,210 to help me, you would. 242 00:05:19,270 --> 00:05:21,170 Getting into bloosh 243 00:05:19,270 --> 00:05:21,170 is my last chance 244 00:05:19,270 --> 00:05:21,170 to save my store. 245 00:05:21,710 --> 00:05:24,010 You have to go and take me 246 00:05:21,710 --> 00:05:24,010 so I can meet her. Please? 247 00:05:24,250 --> 00:05:27,220 Fine. If it's that important 248 00:05:24,250 --> 00:05:27,220 to your company, 249 00:05:24,250 --> 00:05:27,220 I'll do it. 250 00:05:27,380 --> 00:05:28,440 Yes! 251 00:05:27,380 --> 00:05:28,440 Nice. 252 00:05:28,780 --> 00:05:30,680 Now, I know high-end, 253 00:05:30,750 --> 00:05:33,240 Internet-only 254 00:05:30,750 --> 00:05:33,240 lifestyle magazine 255 00:05:30,750 --> 00:05:33,240 really isn't your scene. 256 00:05:33,320 --> 00:05:36,720 So, Donna and I wrote up 257 00:05:33,320 --> 00:05:36,720 some cocktail banter 258 00:05:36,790 --> 00:05:41,090 and some conversation 259 00:05:36,790 --> 00:05:41,090 snippets for you to 260 00:05:36,790 --> 00:05:41,090 practice so you can fit in. 261 00:05:41,160 --> 00:05:45,260 "Annabel, could I be 262 00:05:41,160 --> 00:05:45,260 more jels of your 263 00:05:41,160 --> 00:05:45,260 low-lights right now? 264 00:05:45,370 --> 00:05:48,930 "I mean, oh-M-squee, 265 00:05:45,370 --> 00:05:48,930 talk about bangs envy." 266 00:05:49,040 --> 00:05:52,340 You got a long way 267 00:05:49,040 --> 00:05:52,340 to go, Swanson. 268 00:05:49,040 --> 00:05:52,340 Let's go again, from the top. 269 00:05:53,110 --> 00:05:54,580 I regret everything. 270 00:05:54,910 --> 00:05:57,000 Babe, you made it. 271 00:05:54,910 --> 00:05:57,000 It's 8:00. 272 00:05:57,080 --> 00:06:00,280 Thank God. Okay, everyone, 273 00:05:57,080 --> 00:06:00,280 great work as always. 274 00:06:00,410 --> 00:06:03,850 I'm going to stay here 275 00:06:00,410 --> 00:06:03,850 and just kind of wait 276 00:06:00,410 --> 00:06:03,850 for the results to pour in. 277 00:06:03,920 --> 00:06:05,680 Thank you. 278 00:06:03,920 --> 00:06:05,680 I'll see you all tomorrow. 279 00:06:05,790 --> 00:06:07,650 We're not going anywhere. 280 00:06:05,790 --> 00:06:07,650 We're staying with you. 281 00:06:07,720 --> 00:06:09,880 No, really, it's going to be 282 00:06:07,720 --> 00:06:09,880 hours before they call it. 283 00:06:09,960 --> 00:06:12,860 We're not leaving, woman. 284 00:06:09,960 --> 00:06:12,860 Stop trying to get rid of us. 285 00:06:13,130 --> 00:06:15,720 Yeah, I made frappuccinos 286 00:06:13,130 --> 00:06:15,720 for a little caffeine boost. 287 00:06:15,830 --> 00:06:17,300 And Larry went to get 288 00:06:15,830 --> 00:06:17,300 pizzas for everyone. 289 00:06:17,770 --> 00:06:21,860 Oh. That's very sweet, 290 00:06:17,770 --> 00:06:21,860 you guys. Thank you. 291 00:06:17,770 --> 00:06:21,860 All right, let's hunker down. 292 00:06:22,070 --> 00:06:23,500 It's going to be 293 00:06:22,070 --> 00:06:23,500 a long night. 294 00:06:26,510 --> 00:06:30,170 Too close to call. 295 00:06:26,510 --> 00:06:30,170 A real nail-biter. 296 00:06:26,510 --> 00:06:30,170 Anybody's game. 297 00:06:30,440 --> 00:06:34,210 These are three phrases 298 00:06:30,440 --> 00:06:34,210 you won't hear tonight, 299 00:06:30,440 --> 00:06:34,210 as Leslie Knope 300 00:06:34,280 --> 00:06:35,440 has been voted out of office. 301 00:06:35,520 --> 00:06:37,490 What was expected 302 00:06:35,520 --> 00:06:37,490 to be a close race... 303 00:06:37,550 --> 00:06:39,780 What did he say? 304 00:06:37,550 --> 00:06:39,780 ...has actually been 305 00:06:37,550 --> 00:06:39,780 a not-close race. 306 00:06:40,090 --> 00:06:43,080 Pawnee voters have 307 00:06:40,090 --> 00:06:43,080 decisively removed 308 00:06:40,090 --> 00:06:43,080 Leslie Knope... 309 00:06:43,360 --> 00:06:44,690 Honey, I'm so sorry. 310 00:06:45,390 --> 00:06:49,920 I gotta the pizza. 311 00:06:45,390 --> 00:06:49,920 Pizza time. 312 00:06:45,390 --> 00:06:49,920 It's a pizza time. 313 00:06:50,000 --> 00:06:53,370 Larry? Everyone 314 00:06:50,000 --> 00:06:53,370 is miserable and you are 315 00:06:50,000 --> 00:06:53,370 only making it worse. 316 00:06:57,810 --> 00:06:59,100 Okay. Leslie's 317 00:06:57,810 --> 00:06:59,100 on her way in. 318 00:06:59,170 --> 00:07:01,230 Is she okay? I left her, 319 00:06:59,170 --> 00:07:01,230 like, 30 voicemails, 320 00:07:01,310 --> 00:07:03,740 and her outgoing message 321 00:07:01,310 --> 00:07:03,740 is just her sobbing 322 00:07:03,810 --> 00:07:05,210 and burping 323 00:07:03,810 --> 00:07:05,210 and crazy laughing. 324 00:07:05,380 --> 00:07:08,980 Yeah, you know what? 325 00:07:05,380 --> 00:07:08,980 She's actually 326 00:07:05,380 --> 00:07:08,980 handling it pretty well. 327 00:07:09,050 --> 00:07:10,040 Sup, fartwads? 328 00:07:10,120 --> 00:07:12,850 Are you eating 329 00:07:10,120 --> 00:07:12,850 a Paunch Burger? 330 00:07:12,920 --> 00:07:15,520 Well, you know what? 331 00:07:12,920 --> 00:07:15,520 If you can't beat them, 332 00:07:12,920 --> 00:07:15,520 join them. 333 00:07:15,590 --> 00:07:18,650 I mean, I've been 334 00:07:15,590 --> 00:07:18,650 boycotting them ever since 335 00:07:15,590 --> 00:07:18,650 Pinewood and her goons 336 00:07:18,730 --> 00:07:21,530 started this whole 337 00:07:18,730 --> 00:07:21,530 recall business. 338 00:07:18,730 --> 00:07:21,530 But who cares now, right? 339 00:07:21,660 --> 00:07:23,960 What does it matter? 340 00:07:21,660 --> 00:07:23,960 Nothing matters anymore. 341 00:07:24,470 --> 00:07:26,130 Mmm. Oh, my God. 342 00:07:24,470 --> 00:07:26,130 This is good. 343 00:07:26,870 --> 00:07:27,890 This is really good. 344 00:07:28,570 --> 00:07:29,800 Why did I ever fight this? 345 00:07:29,870 --> 00:07:31,700 Have you thought about 346 00:07:29,870 --> 00:07:31,700 a concession speech? 347 00:07:31,770 --> 00:07:34,770 Oh. Concession speech? 348 00:07:31,770 --> 00:07:34,770 Yeah. I wrote one. 349 00:07:37,280 --> 00:07:39,680 "Eat my shorts, jabronies. 350 00:07:37,280 --> 00:07:39,680 Knope out." 351 00:07:39,980 --> 00:07:43,210 I thought it best to revisit 352 00:07:39,980 --> 00:07:43,210 the concession speech 353 00:07:39,980 --> 00:07:43,210 at a later time. 354 00:07:44,950 --> 00:07:46,850 But we should focus 355 00:07:44,950 --> 00:07:46,850 on the haunted house. 356 00:07:46,920 --> 00:07:48,510 And you know 357 00:07:46,920 --> 00:07:48,510 what I think it needs, 358 00:07:48,590 --> 00:07:53,460 actually, is a papier-mâché 359 00:07:48,590 --> 00:07:53,460 Li'l Sebastian! 360 00:07:53,590 --> 00:07:54,720 What? 361 00:07:53,590 --> 00:07:54,720 Oh! 362 00:07:54,800 --> 00:07:56,090 Oh! 363 00:07:57,030 --> 00:07:58,020 Hmm. 364 00:07:58,600 --> 00:08:00,120 I'm going to go 365 00:07:58,600 --> 00:08:00,120 fall asleep on a bench. 366 00:08:06,510 --> 00:08:11,840 I can honestly say 367 00:08:06,510 --> 00:08:11,840 today's guest is the only 368 00:08:06,510 --> 00:08:11,840 person in this town 369 00:08:11,910 --> 00:08:15,470 who's a bigger deal 370 00:08:11,910 --> 00:08:15,470 than I am. 371 00:08:15,550 --> 00:08:19,710 Please welcome lifestyle guru, 372 00:08:15,550 --> 00:08:19,710 Annabel Porter. 373 00:08:20,250 --> 00:08:23,220 Hello, hello. 374 00:08:20,250 --> 00:08:23,220 It's me. I'm here. 375 00:08:23,390 --> 00:08:25,220 Yes, you are. 376 00:08:23,390 --> 00:08:25,220 Hi. 377 00:08:25,360 --> 00:08:27,230 Can I just say, 378 00:08:25,360 --> 00:08:27,230 as a journalist, 379 00:08:27,290 --> 00:08:29,020 I feel like 380 00:08:27,290 --> 00:08:29,020 we're best friends. 381 00:08:30,360 --> 00:08:32,270 Tell the audience 382 00:08:30,360 --> 00:08:32,270 about yourself. 383 00:08:32,670 --> 00:08:37,200 Well, I'm just a simple 384 00:08:32,670 --> 00:08:37,200 former phonebook model 385 00:08:32,670 --> 00:08:37,200 who found her calling. 386 00:08:37,270 --> 00:08:39,000 You know, I'm not perfect. 387 00:08:37,270 --> 00:08:39,000 Oh. 388 00:08:39,070 --> 00:08:42,270 The average woman worries 389 00:08:39,070 --> 00:08:42,270 about what she looks like 390 00:08:39,070 --> 00:08:42,270 in a bathing suit. 391 00:08:42,540 --> 00:08:44,410 So does my nanny. So... 392 00:08:42,540 --> 00:08:44,410 Mmm. 393 00:08:44,550 --> 00:08:46,010 I get it. 394 00:08:44,550 --> 00:08:46,010 Annabel. 395 00:08:46,080 --> 00:08:49,450 What trends are, 396 00:08:46,080 --> 00:08:49,450 pardon the pun, 397 00:08:46,080 --> 00:08:49,450 but, trending? 398 00:08:49,920 --> 00:08:54,250 First of all, 399 00:08:49,920 --> 00:08:54,250 Mozambique cashmere 400 00:08:49,920 --> 00:08:54,250 is the new cast iron stove. 401 00:08:54,320 --> 00:08:55,310 Of course. 402 00:08:55,420 --> 00:08:56,790 I have found some 403 00:08:55,420 --> 00:08:56,790 amazing new 404 00:08:56,860 --> 00:08:58,790 conflict-free paella recipes. 405 00:08:56,860 --> 00:08:58,790 Mmm. 406 00:08:59,030 --> 00:09:02,790 And luckily, my favorite 407 00:08:59,030 --> 00:09:02,790 fishmonger now makes 408 00:08:59,030 --> 00:09:02,790 house calls. 409 00:09:02,930 --> 00:09:05,060 Well, thank God. 410 00:09:02,930 --> 00:09:05,060 Finally. 411 00:09:05,130 --> 00:09:10,830 But my fave new item 412 00:09:05,130 --> 00:09:10,830 is a deliciously bold chair 413 00:09:11,070 --> 00:09:13,040 by local artist Ron Swanson. 414 00:09:11,070 --> 00:09:13,040 Mmm. 415 00:09:13,210 --> 00:09:17,010 Ron Swanson is here. 416 00:09:13,210 --> 00:09:17,010 He will be joining us 417 00:09:13,210 --> 00:09:17,010 after the break. 418 00:09:17,080 --> 00:09:18,880 So, stick around. 419 00:09:19,550 --> 00:09:22,020 Did that woman 420 00:09:19,550 --> 00:09:22,020 call my chair "delicious"? 421 00:09:22,580 --> 00:09:24,480 Whoo. Happy Halloween. 422 00:09:24,550 --> 00:09:26,540 Caterpillar. Thank you. 423 00:09:26,890 --> 00:09:28,320 Hey, guys. Come on in. 424 00:09:29,090 --> 00:09:30,990 Welcome 425 00:09:29,090 --> 00:09:30,990 to the den of horrors. 426 00:09:31,130 --> 00:09:34,060 Where's all the scary stuff? 427 00:09:31,130 --> 00:09:34,060 The scary stuff 428 00:09:31,130 --> 00:09:34,060 is invisible, Leah. 429 00:09:34,390 --> 00:09:37,730 Broken dreams, 430 00:09:34,390 --> 00:09:37,730 disappointment, achieving 431 00:09:34,390 --> 00:09:37,730 your greatest goal, 432 00:09:37,800 --> 00:09:41,100 having it all fall apart 433 00:09:37,800 --> 00:09:41,100 and knowing that you'll 434 00:09:37,800 --> 00:09:41,100 never climb any higher. 435 00:09:41,570 --> 00:09:42,970 Can we have some candy? 436 00:09:43,040 --> 00:09:45,340 I'm going to give you 437 00:09:43,040 --> 00:09:45,340 something sweeter 438 00:09:43,040 --> 00:09:45,340 than candy, Ryan. 439 00:09:45,570 --> 00:09:49,440 The truth. It's very possible 440 00:09:45,570 --> 00:09:49,440 that some of you 441 00:09:45,570 --> 00:09:49,440 have already peaked. 442 00:09:49,810 --> 00:09:51,340 It's all downhill 443 00:09:49,810 --> 00:09:51,340 from here, turkeys. 444 00:09:51,410 --> 00:09:53,880 Okay. Let's say goodbye 445 00:09:51,410 --> 00:09:53,880 to Ms. Knope, kids. 446 00:09:54,180 --> 00:09:56,410 It is Ms. Knope. It's not 447 00:09:54,180 --> 00:09:56,410 City Councilwoman Knope. 448 00:09:56,480 --> 00:09:58,280 Because that chapter 449 00:09:56,480 --> 00:09:58,280 of my life is already over. 450 00:09:58,450 --> 00:10:02,250 Just remember, kids, 451 00:09:58,450 --> 00:10:02,250 nothing gold can stay. 452 00:10:02,320 --> 00:10:03,310 Okay. 453 00:10:04,390 --> 00:10:08,330 Oh, my goodness. 454 00:10:04,390 --> 00:10:08,330 We are back with 455 00:10:04,390 --> 00:10:08,330 America's greatest leader, 456 00:10:08,430 --> 00:10:12,300 Annabel Porter, 457 00:10:08,430 --> 00:10:12,300 and her new favorite artisan, 458 00:10:12,730 --> 00:10:15,260 local woodworker, 459 00:10:12,730 --> 00:10:15,260 Ron Swanson. 460 00:10:15,640 --> 00:10:16,630 Hello. 461 00:10:16,800 --> 00:10:19,300 I discovered Ron's chairs 462 00:10:16,800 --> 00:10:19,300 a few months ago. 463 00:10:19,370 --> 00:10:21,740 And what I absolutely love 464 00:10:21,810 --> 00:10:24,800 about a Swanson is you can 465 00:10:21,810 --> 00:10:24,800 really use it for anything. 466 00:10:24,980 --> 00:10:27,470 Yes. Mostly, 467 00:10:24,980 --> 00:10:27,470 you use it for sitting. 468 00:10:27,550 --> 00:10:30,580 Make it a rustic 469 00:10:27,550 --> 00:10:30,580 accent piece 470 00:10:27,550 --> 00:10:30,580 in your solarium. 471 00:10:30,850 --> 00:10:33,750 Even better, use it 472 00:10:30,850 --> 00:10:33,750 as a focal point 473 00:10:30,850 --> 00:10:33,750 in your yoga tent. 474 00:10:34,090 --> 00:10:36,180 Put it by a table 475 00:10:34,090 --> 00:10:36,180 and eat a meal. 476 00:10:36,490 --> 00:10:40,330 We don't do meals in my home. 477 00:10:36,490 --> 00:10:40,330 No. Every two hours, 478 00:10:40,590 --> 00:10:43,120 we eat what I like 479 00:10:40,590 --> 00:10:43,120 to call a "food tease." 480 00:10:43,430 --> 00:10:46,060 Like an oat wedge 481 00:10:43,430 --> 00:10:46,060 or a seaweed lozenge. 482 00:10:46,530 --> 00:10:49,970 Can I just say, 483 00:10:46,530 --> 00:10:49,970 and I think this 484 00:10:46,530 --> 00:10:49,970 is really important, 485 00:10:50,040 --> 00:10:51,840 so I need everyone to shut up. 486 00:10:53,510 --> 00:10:55,070 I love your hair. 487 00:10:53,510 --> 00:10:55,070 Oh. 488 00:10:55,640 --> 00:10:58,440 Thank you. It's genetic 489 00:10:55,640 --> 00:10:58,440 and unattainable. 490 00:11:02,280 --> 00:11:04,440 I am scaring you! 491 00:11:05,190 --> 00:11:06,350 I could see you. 492 00:11:06,450 --> 00:11:08,450 There's, like, 493 00:11:06,450 --> 00:11:08,450 a million mirrors 494 00:11:06,450 --> 00:11:08,450 in front of me. 495 00:11:09,090 --> 00:11:11,290 And you're never 496 00:11:09,090 --> 00:11:11,290 going to make me 497 00:11:09,090 --> 00:11:11,290 not miss Andy. Okay? 498 00:11:11,430 --> 00:11:15,330 What about this? 499 00:11:11,430 --> 00:11:15,330 I'm Burt Macklin, 500 00:11:11,430 --> 00:11:15,330 friendly lifeguard. 501 00:11:15,560 --> 00:11:19,000 Burt Macklin 502 00:11:15,560 --> 00:11:19,000 is not a lifeguard. 503 00:11:15,560 --> 00:11:19,000 He's an FBI agent. 504 00:11:19,230 --> 00:11:21,630 Really? That's even harder 505 00:11:19,230 --> 00:11:21,630 to believe. 506 00:11:21,700 --> 00:11:24,040 Just stop. Okay? 507 00:11:21,700 --> 00:11:24,040 Your lame attempts 508 00:11:24,100 --> 00:11:25,660 at trying to cheer me up 509 00:11:24,100 --> 00:11:25,660 are not working. 510 00:11:26,070 --> 00:11:30,010 Now, I'm sad that I miss Andy 511 00:11:26,070 --> 00:11:30,010 and sad that I can't make 512 00:11:26,070 --> 00:11:30,010 fun of you to Andy. 513 00:11:30,380 --> 00:11:32,740 I understand. I'm sorry. 514 00:11:32,810 --> 00:11:35,910 I've failed you, 515 00:11:32,810 --> 00:11:35,910 both as a scary monster 516 00:11:32,810 --> 00:11:35,910 and a friend. 517 00:11:47,090 --> 00:11:50,590 Hey, I am really sorry. 518 00:11:47,090 --> 00:11:50,590 I know you must feel awful. 519 00:11:50,700 --> 00:11:54,260 I don't feel awful. You know? 520 00:11:50,700 --> 00:11:54,260 Actually, I feel like 521 00:11:50,700 --> 00:11:54,260 I can finally relax. 522 00:11:54,770 --> 00:11:56,600 Accepting that you've peaked 523 00:11:54,770 --> 00:11:56,600 is very freeing. 524 00:11:56,700 --> 00:12:00,940 Yeah, I know the feeling. 525 00:11:56,700 --> 00:12:00,940 I was impeached when 526 00:11:56,700 --> 00:12:00,940 I was 18 and it was brutal. 527 00:12:01,010 --> 00:12:03,410 But you just have to keep 528 00:12:01,010 --> 00:12:03,410 climbing back up that hill. 529 00:12:03,810 --> 00:12:08,610 Or do you? Maybe instead 530 00:12:03,810 --> 00:12:08,610 of working super hard 531 00:12:03,810 --> 00:12:08,610 to rebuild your life, 532 00:12:08,920 --> 00:12:13,440 you just said, "I peaked. 533 00:12:08,920 --> 00:12:13,440 Wow! What a great run. 534 00:12:13,790 --> 00:12:16,190 "And now, I'm going 535 00:12:13,790 --> 00:12:16,190 to spend the rest 536 00:12:13,790 --> 00:12:16,190 of my life really chill." 537 00:12:16,260 --> 00:12:19,450 Well, sure. I mean, 538 00:12:16,260 --> 00:12:19,450 part of that sounds 539 00:12:16,260 --> 00:12:19,450 very appealing. 540 00:12:19,590 --> 00:12:23,330 Yeah. 541 00:12:19,590 --> 00:12:23,330 But, no. See, it was 542 00:12:19,590 --> 00:12:23,330 important for me... 543 00:12:23,900 --> 00:12:26,130 See, I took a job 544 00:12:23,900 --> 00:12:26,130 in city budget 545 00:12:23,900 --> 00:12:26,130 crisis management. 546 00:12:26,200 --> 00:12:28,730 And now, I work 547 00:12:26,200 --> 00:12:28,730 for a candy charity. 548 00:12:30,470 --> 00:12:32,100 Oh, God. Did I peak 549 00:12:30,470 --> 00:12:32,100 when I was 18? 550 00:12:32,170 --> 00:12:34,040 There it is. Drink up. 551 00:12:37,910 --> 00:12:38,900 Whoo! 552 00:12:37,910 --> 00:12:38,900 Shots. 553 00:12:41,550 --> 00:12:43,920 B13 shots. 554 00:12:43,980 --> 00:12:46,580 Bird bath salts. What? 555 00:12:46,650 --> 00:12:48,490 Champagne decanters! 556 00:12:48,720 --> 00:12:50,250 This is heaven. 557 00:12:51,290 --> 00:12:54,690 I love your chair. 558 00:12:51,290 --> 00:12:54,690 I need 12 for my 559 00:12:51,290 --> 00:12:54,690 stepdaughter's craft room. 560 00:12:54,760 --> 00:12:57,530 Well, I make two a year. 561 00:12:54,760 --> 00:12:57,530 So, maybe in six years. 562 00:12:57,630 --> 00:12:59,160 Can you put me 563 00:12:57,630 --> 00:12:59,160 on the wait list? 564 00:12:57,630 --> 00:12:59,160 Me, too. 565 00:12:59,270 --> 00:13:01,860 Unless your chair 566 00:12:59,270 --> 00:13:01,860 was ever touched by 567 00:12:59,270 --> 00:13:01,860 someone who ate refined sugar. 568 00:13:02,000 --> 00:13:04,630 Then, I can't buy 569 00:13:02,000 --> 00:13:04,630 any of your chairs and I 570 00:13:02,000 --> 00:13:04,630 protest this entire event. 571 00:13:05,240 --> 00:13:06,870 Okay, Ron. 572 00:13:05,240 --> 00:13:06,870 Annabel's coming over. 573 00:13:06,940 --> 00:13:09,000 When you talk me up, 574 00:13:06,940 --> 00:13:09,000 be sure to mention 575 00:13:09,180 --> 00:13:13,080 that you really admire 576 00:13:09,180 --> 00:13:13,080 how I take big risks 577 00:13:09,180 --> 00:13:13,080 with men's neck accessories. 578 00:13:13,310 --> 00:13:15,940 There he is. Hello, hello. 579 00:13:16,180 --> 00:13:19,150 Thank you for your kind words 580 00:13:16,180 --> 00:13:19,150 about my chairs, Ms. Porter. 581 00:13:19,250 --> 00:13:23,520 No, thank us. You are 582 00:13:19,250 --> 00:13:23,520 about to make a ton of money. 583 00:13:23,790 --> 00:13:26,820 I want to license 584 00:13:23,790 --> 00:13:26,820 your designs. We are going 585 00:13:23,790 --> 00:13:26,820 to put Swanson chairs 586 00:13:26,890 --> 00:13:29,090 in every six-bedroom 587 00:13:26,890 --> 00:13:29,090 home in the Midwest. 588 00:13:29,330 --> 00:13:30,800 If my chairs were 589 00:13:29,330 --> 00:13:30,800 mass-produced, 590 00:13:30,860 --> 00:13:32,330 they wouldn't be 591 00:13:30,860 --> 00:13:32,330 Swanson chairs. 592 00:13:32,770 --> 00:13:34,500 Swanson chairs are handmade. 593 00:13:34,740 --> 00:13:37,930 Yes. And now, they will be 594 00:13:34,740 --> 00:13:37,930 made by thousands 595 00:13:34,740 --> 00:13:37,930 of tiny Chinese hands. 596 00:13:39,610 --> 00:13:43,010 Oh. Ms. Porter, this is 597 00:13:39,610 --> 00:13:43,010 my very good friend, 598 00:13:39,610 --> 00:13:43,010 Tom Haverford. 599 00:13:43,080 --> 00:13:47,010 He's a big fan of your... 600 00:13:43,080 --> 00:13:47,010 Whatever you call 601 00:13:43,080 --> 00:13:47,010 what you do. 602 00:13:47,080 --> 00:13:49,140 Please speak to each other 603 00:13:47,080 --> 00:13:49,140 while I leave. 604 00:13:49,220 --> 00:13:52,190 Oh. No, I am not done 605 00:13:49,220 --> 00:13:52,190 with you, you wicked 606 00:13:49,220 --> 00:13:52,190 little so-and-so. 607 00:13:52,250 --> 00:13:53,350 Terrific. 608 00:13:54,620 --> 00:13:56,650 You know what? I had my time. 609 00:13:54,620 --> 00:13:56,650 You know? I did my thing. 610 00:13:56,720 --> 00:13:58,190 I wanted to be 611 00:13:56,720 --> 00:13:58,190 a City Councilor. 612 00:13:58,260 --> 00:14:00,160 And I did. And I was. 613 00:13:58,260 --> 00:14:00,160 And I was like... Whoo! 614 00:14:00,260 --> 00:14:01,660 And then, people were like... 615 00:14:02,300 --> 00:14:05,560 At least we have each other. 616 00:14:02,300 --> 00:14:05,560 I love you so much. 617 00:14:05,800 --> 00:14:08,230 I love you, too. 618 00:14:05,800 --> 00:14:08,230 This is real. 619 00:14:08,300 --> 00:14:09,360 I know. 620 00:14:08,300 --> 00:14:09,360 You're my husband. 621 00:14:09,470 --> 00:14:11,500 You're my wife. 622 00:14:09,470 --> 00:14:11,500 You married me 623 00:14:09,470 --> 00:14:11,500 in front of people. 624 00:14:11,610 --> 00:14:13,400 I did. I was there. 625 00:14:11,610 --> 00:14:13,400 We may have peaked. 626 00:14:13,470 --> 00:14:16,340 But it doesn't matter. 627 00:14:13,470 --> 00:14:16,340 We need to do something big. 628 00:14:13,470 --> 00:14:16,340 You know? 629 00:14:16,410 --> 00:14:17,880 Something that really 630 00:14:16,410 --> 00:14:17,880 lets people know 631 00:14:17,940 --> 00:14:19,440 that we're going 632 00:14:17,940 --> 00:14:19,440 to love each other forever. 633 00:14:19,510 --> 00:14:20,740 Yeah! What is it? 634 00:14:21,420 --> 00:14:22,510 I got it. 635 00:14:22,580 --> 00:14:24,780 Hello, sir. We're sober. 636 00:14:24,850 --> 00:14:27,150 We would like to get 637 00:14:24,850 --> 00:14:27,150 tattoos on our bodies 638 00:14:24,850 --> 00:14:27,150 because we love each other. 639 00:14:27,320 --> 00:14:28,750 Tattoos? 640 00:14:27,320 --> 00:14:28,750 This is a pawn shop. 641 00:14:30,060 --> 00:14:31,180 But yeah, sure, 642 00:14:30,060 --> 00:14:31,180 I can do that. 643 00:14:31,290 --> 00:14:34,280 Oh! 644 00:14:31,290 --> 00:14:34,280 Yes! It's gonna happen! 645 00:14:34,560 --> 00:14:36,830 Look what he's doing! 646 00:14:34,560 --> 00:14:36,830 He's breaking pens! 647 00:14:36,900 --> 00:14:40,600 This is the idea 648 00:14:36,900 --> 00:14:40,600 of the century. 649 00:14:36,900 --> 00:14:40,600 Right here. 650 00:14:41,000 --> 00:14:42,060 Ow. 651 00:14:42,600 --> 00:14:43,800 Come here. 652 00:14:47,570 --> 00:14:49,010 My store is called 653 00:14:47,570 --> 00:14:49,010 Rent A Swag. 654 00:14:49,140 --> 00:14:51,130 It's a clothing 655 00:14:49,140 --> 00:14:51,130 rental service for teens. 656 00:14:51,210 --> 00:14:53,200 It's an interesting idea. 657 00:14:51,210 --> 00:14:53,200 Are you guys doing well? 658 00:14:53,280 --> 00:14:56,940 We're doing amazing. 659 00:14:53,280 --> 00:14:56,940 And it would be 660 00:14:53,280 --> 00:14:56,940 perfect for bloosh. 661 00:14:57,150 --> 00:15:00,020 Why don't you take out 662 00:14:57,150 --> 00:15:00,020 whatever you wrote 663 00:14:57,150 --> 00:15:00,020 about my chairs 664 00:15:00,090 --> 00:15:02,390 and put something in about 665 00:15:00,090 --> 00:15:02,390 Rent A Swag instead? 666 00:15:02,520 --> 00:15:06,360 This month's trends 667 00:15:02,520 --> 00:15:06,360 are final. I can't just 668 00:15:02,520 --> 00:15:06,360 throw a trend out. 669 00:15:06,690 --> 00:15:10,860 But my bloosh scouts 670 00:15:06,690 --> 00:15:10,860 have started trend-tracking 671 00:15:06,690 --> 00:15:10,860 for the February zine blast. 672 00:15:11,360 --> 00:15:12,700 Good God, these words. 673 00:15:12,770 --> 00:15:13,930 I'll have them stop 674 00:15:12,770 --> 00:15:13,930 by your store. 675 00:15:14,000 --> 00:15:15,730 That will be too late. 676 00:15:14,000 --> 00:15:15,730 We'll be out 677 00:15:14,000 --> 00:15:15,730 of business by then. 678 00:15:16,170 --> 00:15:17,260 I thought you said 679 00:15:16,170 --> 00:15:17,260 you were doing well. 680 00:15:18,370 --> 00:15:21,810 Ronnie. One last time, 681 00:15:18,370 --> 00:15:21,810 have you reconsidered 682 00:15:18,370 --> 00:15:21,810 mass production? 683 00:15:21,940 --> 00:15:24,470 I can sell your chairs 684 00:15:21,940 --> 00:15:24,470 on my site. 685 00:15:24,540 --> 00:15:28,810 No, thank you, ma'am. 686 00:15:24,540 --> 00:15:28,810 I'm not interested in letting 687 00:15:24,540 --> 00:15:28,810 someone else sell my work. 688 00:15:29,050 --> 00:15:30,640 Well, that's too bad. 689 00:15:32,520 --> 00:15:37,480 This party is over. 690 00:15:32,520 --> 00:15:37,480 It no longer is. It was. 691 00:15:37,890 --> 00:15:40,330 It was? That was my last shot. 692 00:15:40,530 --> 00:15:44,560 Sorry, Tommy. 693 00:15:40,530 --> 00:15:44,560 Let's just grab some of that 694 00:15:40,530 --> 00:15:44,560 lychee body oil and bounce. 695 00:15:44,900 --> 00:15:47,060 Can you grab me some of those 696 00:15:44,900 --> 00:15:47,060 pomegranate face masks, too? 697 00:15:47,230 --> 00:15:48,500 For sure. 698 00:15:49,140 --> 00:15:52,440 Can I ask you a question? 699 00:15:49,140 --> 00:15:52,440 Are we the cutest couple 700 00:15:49,140 --> 00:15:52,440 you've ever seen? 701 00:15:52,870 --> 00:15:55,810 Nope. Okay. You want the long 702 00:15:52,870 --> 00:15:55,810 needle or the short needle? 703 00:15:56,140 --> 00:15:58,480 Doesn't matter. 704 00:15:56,140 --> 00:15:58,480 Can't find the short needle.' 705 00:15:56,140 --> 00:15:58,480 Long needle it is. 706 00:15:58,680 --> 00:16:02,080 I have a big idea. 707 00:15:58,680 --> 00:16:02,080 I want a portrait 708 00:16:02,150 --> 00:16:04,410 of Eleanor Roosevelt 709 00:16:02,150 --> 00:16:04,410 tastefully done. 710 00:16:04,550 --> 00:16:09,180 And then, she has 711 00:16:04,550 --> 00:16:09,180 a very classy tattoo 712 00:16:04,550 --> 00:16:09,180 of Pat Benatar on her arm 713 00:16:09,290 --> 00:16:10,950 and that's very subtle. 714 00:16:09,290 --> 00:16:10,950 Hmm. 715 00:16:11,020 --> 00:16:12,960 No. Scratch that. 716 00:16:11,020 --> 00:16:12,960 Scratch all that. 717 00:16:11,020 --> 00:16:12,960 Just write "Ben." 718 00:16:13,060 --> 00:16:14,890 Do you have anything 719 00:16:13,060 --> 00:16:14,890 to numb the pain? 720 00:16:14,960 --> 00:16:17,160 Sure, take a scoop 721 00:16:14,960 --> 00:16:17,160 out of the pill bucket. 722 00:16:18,470 --> 00:16:20,590 Okay. You said you wanted 723 00:16:18,470 --> 00:16:20,590 "Mouth Queen"? 724 00:16:20,930 --> 00:16:23,960 No. Stop. Stop it. 725 00:16:20,930 --> 00:16:23,960 Stop everything 726 00:16:20,930 --> 00:16:23,960 that you're doing. Stop it. 727 00:16:24,070 --> 00:16:26,600 Ann's here! 728 00:16:24,070 --> 00:16:26,600 Ann wants a tattoo! 729 00:16:26,940 --> 00:16:29,430 Ann! 730 00:16:26,940 --> 00:16:29,430 No. No. No. Shh! 731 00:16:29,510 --> 00:16:32,000 Ann does not want a tattoo. 732 00:16:29,510 --> 00:16:32,000 No one wants a tattoo. 733 00:16:32,110 --> 00:16:35,480 Ann. Relax. 734 00:16:32,110 --> 00:16:35,480 Be respitable for a second. 735 00:16:35,750 --> 00:16:37,620 Okay? What we are 736 00:16:35,750 --> 00:16:37,620 doing is not nuts. 737 00:16:37,680 --> 00:16:39,450 We are merely 738 00:16:37,680 --> 00:16:39,450 getting tattoos so that 739 00:16:39,520 --> 00:16:41,650 everybody knows 740 00:16:39,520 --> 00:16:41,650 we love each other 741 00:16:39,520 --> 00:16:41,650 and that we haven't peaked. 742 00:16:41,760 --> 00:16:43,720 It makes a lot of sense. 743 00:16:44,060 --> 00:16:47,290 Okay, we're leaving. 744 00:16:44,060 --> 00:16:47,290 All right? So, say goodbye 745 00:16:44,060 --> 00:16:47,290 to the nice man 746 00:16:47,430 --> 00:16:50,990 and thank me for saving you 747 00:16:47,430 --> 00:16:50,990 from being on Dateline. 748 00:16:47,430 --> 00:16:50,990 Okay. Let's go. Come on. 749 00:16:51,060 --> 00:16:53,800 Goodbye, world traveler. 750 00:16:51,060 --> 00:16:53,800 Later, bro-heisen. 751 00:16:54,100 --> 00:16:55,860 Ben. 752 00:16:54,100 --> 00:16:55,860 Come on. 753 00:16:57,970 --> 00:17:00,270 I don't want to be 754 00:16:57,970 --> 00:17:00,270 a failure again, Ron. 755 00:17:00,340 --> 00:17:04,300 There's no shame in failure 756 00:17:00,340 --> 00:17:04,300 if you gave it 757 00:17:00,340 --> 00:17:04,300 an honest effort. 758 00:17:04,380 --> 00:17:06,900 Easy for you to say. 759 00:17:04,380 --> 00:17:06,900 People are dying to give you 760 00:17:04,380 --> 00:17:06,900 money for your business, 761 00:17:06,980 --> 00:17:08,110 and you didn't even take it. 762 00:17:08,250 --> 00:17:12,190 I didn't sell my chairs 763 00:17:08,250 --> 00:17:12,190 to that website 764 00:17:08,250 --> 00:17:12,190 because I value my name. 765 00:17:12,250 --> 00:17:14,850 I mean, the only thing 766 00:17:12,250 --> 00:17:14,850 that's important 767 00:17:12,250 --> 00:17:14,850 at the end of the day 768 00:17:14,920 --> 00:17:16,910 is what's on your gravestone. 769 00:17:14,920 --> 00:17:16,910 Your name. 770 00:17:17,560 --> 00:17:19,420 My gravestone's going to be 771 00:17:17,560 --> 00:17:19,420 a 60-inch touch screen 772 00:17:19,490 --> 00:17:22,220 with a hologram of four me's 773 00:17:19,490 --> 00:17:22,220 singing End of the Road 774 00:17:19,490 --> 00:17:22,220 by Boyz Il Men. 775 00:17:24,630 --> 00:17:25,660 But point taken. 776 00:17:26,070 --> 00:17:29,870 Ben. What is the first rule 777 00:17:26,070 --> 00:17:29,870 of the Leslie Knope 778 00:17:26,070 --> 00:17:29,870 Emotional Support Task Force? 779 00:17:30,800 --> 00:17:33,210 "Don't let her get a tattoo." 780 00:17:30,800 --> 00:17:33,210 What the hell happened? 781 00:17:33,270 --> 00:17:34,500 I couldn't help it. 782 00:17:34,570 --> 00:17:37,670 She's so cute 783 00:17:34,570 --> 00:17:37,670 when she's coming up 784 00:17:34,570 --> 00:17:37,670 with destructive ideas. 785 00:17:38,580 --> 00:17:40,310 Never send a husband 786 00:17:38,580 --> 00:17:40,310 to do a best friend's job. 787 00:17:40,380 --> 00:17:42,680 Out, Wyatt. 788 00:17:40,380 --> 00:17:42,680 Walk it off. Walk it off. 789 00:17:43,080 --> 00:17:44,070 Fine. 790 00:17:45,950 --> 00:17:47,320 You did it. 791 00:17:45,950 --> 00:17:47,320 Yep. 792 00:17:47,650 --> 00:17:49,520 See you later, Ann. 793 00:17:47,650 --> 00:17:49,520 Nope. Nope, sit down. 794 00:17:49,590 --> 00:17:50,580 Oh. 795 00:17:50,790 --> 00:17:53,060 You are avoiding 796 00:17:50,790 --> 00:17:53,060 your problems. 797 00:17:53,130 --> 00:17:56,030 What? No, I'm not. 798 00:17:53,130 --> 00:17:56,030 Can we talk 799 00:17:53,130 --> 00:17:56,030 about this tomorrow? 800 00:17:56,100 --> 00:17:57,220 You were down in the polls. 801 00:17:57,300 --> 00:17:59,860 Your opponents 802 00:17:57,300 --> 00:17:59,860 were well funded 803 00:17:57,300 --> 00:17:59,860 and well organized. 804 00:17:59,930 --> 00:18:01,700 You must have known 805 00:17:59,930 --> 00:18:01,700 this would be a possibility. 806 00:18:01,840 --> 00:18:04,630 Intellectually, I knew 807 00:18:01,840 --> 00:18:04,630 that I might be in trouble. 808 00:18:04,700 --> 00:18:06,830 But deep in my heart, 809 00:18:04,700 --> 00:18:06,830 I never really thought... 810 00:18:06,910 --> 00:18:10,810 Ben and I tried to help you. 811 00:18:06,910 --> 00:18:10,810 But as usual, you're 812 00:18:06,910 --> 00:18:10,810 the best person for the job. 813 00:18:11,440 --> 00:18:14,570 I wrote this. 814 00:18:11,440 --> 00:18:14,570 You need to hear 815 00:18:11,440 --> 00:18:14,570 yourself read it. 816 00:18:16,150 --> 00:18:19,050 "They held the recall election 817 00:18:16,150 --> 00:18:19,050 and I lost. 818 00:18:20,320 --> 00:18:22,310 "I was voted out of office. 819 00:18:22,390 --> 00:18:25,420 "In 30 days, 820 00:18:22,390 --> 00:18:25,420 I will no longer be 821 00:18:22,390 --> 00:18:25,420 a Pawnee City Councilor." 822 00:18:25,490 --> 00:18:28,190 It's so hard to read 823 00:18:25,490 --> 00:18:28,190 when you're drunk. 824 00:18:25,490 --> 00:18:28,190 Keep going. 825 00:18:28,530 --> 00:18:33,360 "But I am Leslie Knope. 826 00:18:28,530 --> 00:18:33,360 I am more than 827 00:18:28,530 --> 00:18:33,360 a City Councilor. 828 00:18:33,430 --> 00:18:35,700 "I am an unstoppable 829 00:18:33,430 --> 00:18:35,700 force of energy. 830 00:18:36,640 --> 00:18:41,300 "And I will use those days 831 00:18:36,640 --> 00:18:41,300 to work as hard as I can." 832 00:18:42,110 --> 00:18:44,130 These are all your 833 00:18:42,110 --> 00:18:44,130 ongoing projects. 834 00:18:44,510 --> 00:18:46,570 Everything you're currently 835 00:18:44,510 --> 00:18:46,570 working on for Pawnee. 836 00:18:46,810 --> 00:18:48,370 You have things to do. 837 00:18:48,620 --> 00:18:50,520 You have a month left. 838 00:18:48,620 --> 00:18:50,520 Use it. 839 00:18:50,750 --> 00:18:53,950 Ann, you poetic, 840 00:18:50,750 --> 00:18:53,950 noble land mermaid. 841 00:18:54,020 --> 00:18:56,420 You're right, once again. 842 00:18:54,020 --> 00:18:56,420 Thank you. 843 00:18:57,820 --> 00:19:00,060 I flushed my car keys 844 00:18:57,820 --> 00:19:00,060 down the toilet. 845 00:19:00,430 --> 00:19:01,420 No problem. 846 00:19:06,230 --> 00:19:08,000 No! Stop! 847 00:19:08,840 --> 00:19:10,300 Hello to you, too, April. 848 00:19:10,840 --> 00:19:12,500 I'm sorry 849 00:19:10,840 --> 00:19:12,500 I said you were lame. 850 00:19:12,640 --> 00:19:16,010 Okay? You are, 851 00:19:12,640 --> 00:19:16,010 but I know you were 852 00:19:12,640 --> 00:19:16,010 just trying to help me. So... 853 00:19:16,180 --> 00:19:18,440 Thank you, April. 854 00:19:16,180 --> 00:19:18,440 Happy Halloween. 855 00:19:18,810 --> 00:19:20,840 And if you want to egg 856 00:19:18,810 --> 00:19:20,840 Larry's house, come find me. 857 00:19:22,380 --> 00:19:25,110 You guys are cute. 858 00:19:22,380 --> 00:19:25,110 Where did that come from? 859 00:19:25,390 --> 00:19:28,820 I'm weak. I miss Andy 860 00:19:25,390 --> 00:19:28,820 and it's making me weak. 861 00:19:29,620 --> 00:19:33,720 Also, if Chris puts that much 862 00:19:29,620 --> 00:19:33,720 effort into making 863 00:19:29,620 --> 00:19:33,720 my stupid night better, 864 00:19:34,390 --> 00:19:36,360 I'm sure that he'll make 865 00:19:34,390 --> 00:19:36,360 your lame life perfect. 866 00:19:37,560 --> 00:19:41,190 Or he's secretly 867 00:19:37,560 --> 00:19:41,190 super in love with me. 868 00:19:37,560 --> 00:19:41,190 It's probably that. 869 00:19:42,870 --> 00:19:45,070 That's a funny joke, April. 870 00:19:42,870 --> 00:19:45,070 But the truth is, 871 00:19:45,140 --> 00:19:46,610 I'm very much 872 00:19:45,140 --> 00:19:46,610 in love with Ann. 873 00:19:46,910 --> 00:19:47,900 Aw. 874 00:19:48,710 --> 00:19:50,700 Okay, gross, spell is broken. 875 00:19:52,580 --> 00:19:53,600 I've made my decision. 876 00:19:53,780 --> 00:19:56,150 And I'll sell you 877 00:19:53,780 --> 00:19:56,150 Rent A Swag, 878 00:19:53,780 --> 00:19:56,150 but on my terms. 879 00:19:56,220 --> 00:19:57,240 Which are? 880 00:19:57,320 --> 00:20:00,190 $40,000 for the inventory, 881 00:19:57,320 --> 00:20:00,190 the website, and everything 882 00:19:57,320 --> 00:20:00,190 else in the store. 883 00:20:00,250 --> 00:20:03,590 But I keep the name 884 00:20:00,250 --> 00:20:03,590 Rent A Swag. It's mine, 885 00:20:00,250 --> 00:20:03,590 and I'm keeping it. 886 00:20:05,130 --> 00:20:06,860 The name is actually 887 00:20:05,130 --> 00:20:06,860 an important part of the sale. 888 00:20:08,190 --> 00:20:10,220 Really? 889 00:20:08,190 --> 00:20:10,220 Yes, my client 890 00:20:08,190 --> 00:20:10,220 likes the name. 891 00:20:10,330 --> 00:20:13,060 It's better than 892 00:20:10,330 --> 00:20:13,060 Tommy's Closet. 893 00:20:10,330 --> 00:20:13,060 He needs the name. 894 00:20:14,930 --> 00:20:17,430 Well, I don't know 895 00:20:14,930 --> 00:20:17,430 what to tell you. Except... 896 00:20:17,540 --> 00:20:19,870 I'll throw in the name 897 00:20:17,540 --> 00:20:19,870 in exchange for $20,000 more 898 00:20:19,940 --> 00:20:21,600 and 5% of your 899 00:20:19,940 --> 00:20:21,600 client's business. 900 00:20:21,910 --> 00:20:24,570 I'll run it past my client. 901 00:20:21,910 --> 00:20:24,570 But I think we have a deal. 902 00:20:25,650 --> 00:20:27,510 Ron said there's nothing 903 00:20:25,650 --> 00:20:27,510 more valuable than my name. 904 00:20:27,710 --> 00:20:32,050 But he's not a businessman. 905 00:20:27,710 --> 00:20:32,050 I am. And now, I have seed 906 00:20:27,710 --> 00:20:32,050 money for my next venture. 907 00:20:32,450 --> 00:20:33,650 I sold out, baby. 908 00:20:35,760 --> 00:20:38,550 The votes have been counted, 909 00:20:35,760 --> 00:20:38,550 and I have been recalled. 910 00:20:39,630 --> 00:20:40,920 I am, of course, 911 00:20:39,630 --> 00:20:40,920 disappointed. 912 00:20:41,430 --> 00:20:44,520 But I am still 913 00:20:41,430 --> 00:20:44,520 your city councilwoman 914 00:20:41,430 --> 00:20:44,520 for 30 more days. 915 00:20:44,600 --> 00:20:47,070 And I intend to spend 916 00:20:44,600 --> 00:20:47,070 every second I have left 917 00:20:47,130 --> 00:20:49,400 working for you 918 00:20:47,130 --> 00:20:49,400 and this great city. 919 00:20:49,970 --> 00:20:52,910 The thing about being part 920 00:20:49,970 --> 00:20:52,910 of the Leslie Knope 921 00:20:49,970 --> 00:20:52,910 Emotional Support Task Force 922 00:20:52,970 --> 00:20:55,840 is that it's a very easy job. 923 00:20:55,910 --> 00:20:57,430 She's never down 924 00:20:55,910 --> 00:20:57,430 for that long. 925 00:20:57,510 --> 00:20:59,500 And now that she's had 926 00:20:57,510 --> 00:20:59,500 a little time to recharge, 927 00:20:59,580 --> 00:21:02,170 she is like a toddler 928 00:20:59,580 --> 00:21:02,170 bouncing back from a nap. 929 00:21:02,250 --> 00:21:04,240 Hey. There you guys are. 930 00:21:04,320 --> 00:21:06,250 Okay. Ben, I need some help 931 00:21:04,320 --> 00:21:06,250 with the re-zoning thing. 932 00:21:06,320 --> 00:21:07,750 Also, I think we should 933 00:21:06,320 --> 00:21:07,750 paint our deck. 934 00:21:07,820 --> 00:21:09,310 So, I have some 935 00:21:07,820 --> 00:21:09,310 color samples for you. 936 00:21:09,590 --> 00:21:11,750 And to thank you both 937 00:21:09,590 --> 00:21:11,750 for being there 938 00:21:09,590 --> 00:21:11,750 when I needed you, 939 00:21:11,930 --> 00:21:13,760 I carved your faces 940 00:21:11,930 --> 00:21:13,760 into these jack-o-lanterns. 941 00:21:14,030 --> 00:21:15,590 Ann, it was very hard 942 00:21:14,030 --> 00:21:15,590 to capture your beauty. 943 00:21:15,660 --> 00:21:17,760 And, Ben, you make 944 00:21:15,660 --> 00:21:17,760 a sexy pumpkin. 945 00:21:15,660 --> 00:21:17,760 No surprise. 946 00:21:17,830 --> 00:21:19,600 Love you both. 947 00:21:17,830 --> 00:21:19,600 See you later. 948 00:21:20,100 --> 00:21:21,160 Okay. 949 00:21:21,330 --> 00:21:22,320 Wow! 950 00:21:23,040 --> 00:21:24,560 That's amazing. 951 00:21:25,140 --> 00:21:26,370 Not bad.