1 00:00:03,160 --> 00:00:06,920 I've got to say, this report 2 00:00:03,160 --> 00:00:06,920 is quite impressive, 3 00:00:03,160 --> 00:00:06,920 Ms. Knope. 4 00:00:06,990 --> 00:00:09,490 Well, thank you very much, 5 00:00:06,990 --> 00:00:09,490 Mr. City Manager. 6 00:00:06,990 --> 00:00:09,490 And I have to say 7 00:00:09,560 --> 00:00:11,060 that the way that 8 00:00:09,560 --> 00:00:11,060 you're rocking those slacks 9 00:00:11,130 --> 00:00:12,160 is quite impressive, as well. 10 00:00:12,230 --> 00:00:14,130 Well, thank you. 11 00:00:14,200 --> 00:00:15,500 Can we hurry this up, please? 12 00:00:15,570 --> 00:00:18,540 What? There's nothing wrong 13 00:00:15,570 --> 00:00:18,540 with acknowledging 14 00:00:15,570 --> 00:00:18,540 the fantastic work 15 00:00:18,610 --> 00:00:21,540 of one of your employees. 16 00:00:18,610 --> 00:00:21,540 Especially if she's adorable. 17 00:00:21,710 --> 00:00:24,340 I am back in 18 00:00:21,710 --> 00:00:24,340 the Parks Department 19 00:00:21,710 --> 00:00:24,340 and Ben is city manager. 20 00:00:24,410 --> 00:00:26,850 But we're married, 21 00:00:24,410 --> 00:00:26,850 so it's kosher. 22 00:00:24,410 --> 00:00:26,850 And awesome. 23 00:00:26,910 --> 00:00:28,680 We live together... 24 00:00:26,910 --> 00:00:28,680 And work together. 25 00:00:28,750 --> 00:00:31,180 And we are so in sync... 26 00:00:28,750 --> 00:00:31,180 In sync, that 27 00:00:28,750 --> 00:00:31,180 we finish each other's... 28 00:00:31,250 --> 00:00:34,420 Sentences. 29 00:00:31,250 --> 00:00:34,420 We rehearsed that at home. 30 00:00:35,020 --> 00:00:36,150 Naked in bed. 31 00:00:36,220 --> 00:00:37,250 What? 32 00:00:37,890 --> 00:00:39,120 Please stamp the form. 33 00:00:41,300 --> 00:00:45,630 I just want to 34 00:00:41,300 --> 00:00:45,630 admire it one more time. 35 00:00:41,300 --> 00:00:45,630 Again, fantastic work. 36 00:00:46,370 --> 00:00:50,070 In fact, such good work, 37 00:00:46,370 --> 00:00:50,070 I think I'm in love with you. 38 00:00:50,140 --> 00:00:51,870 Oh, my God. 39 00:00:50,140 --> 00:00:51,870 That's great news. 40 00:00:51,940 --> 00:00:52,930 Because I'm in love 41 00:00:51,940 --> 00:00:52,930 with you, too. 42 00:00:53,010 --> 00:00:54,000 What? 43 00:00:54,080 --> 00:00:55,130 Stamp the form. 44 00:00:55,210 --> 00:00:56,970 Okay, let's not 45 00:00:55,210 --> 00:00:56,970 let Ron feel left out. 46 00:00:57,040 --> 00:00:58,030 We love you, too, Ron. 47 00:00:58,110 --> 00:00:59,810 Stamp the damn form! 48 00:00:58,110 --> 00:00:59,810 Group hug. 49 00:00:59,880 --> 00:01:02,040 I'm down for a group hug. 50 00:00:59,880 --> 00:01:02,040 Little G.H.? 51 00:01:02,120 --> 00:01:03,610 Bring it in. 52 00:01:02,120 --> 00:01:03,610 Come on. 53 00:01:06,750 --> 00:01:07,920 Wow. 54 00:01:07,990 --> 00:01:09,290 I think our love 55 00:01:07,990 --> 00:01:09,290 made him angry. 56 00:01:09,360 --> 00:01:11,090 I think he broke my wrist. 57 00:01:09,360 --> 00:01:11,090 I'm not kidding. 58 00:01:09,360 --> 00:01:11,090 Really? 59 00:01:31,780 --> 00:01:32,800 Good morning, 60 00:01:31,780 --> 00:01:32,800 Ann Perkins. 61 00:01:32,880 --> 00:01:34,010 How are you feeling today? 62 00:01:34,080 --> 00:01:36,140 Perfect. 63 00:01:34,080 --> 00:01:36,140 Except that I'm a whale, 64 00:01:36,220 --> 00:01:37,690 and that my feet already kill. 65 00:01:37,750 --> 00:01:39,520 Whales don't have feet. 66 00:01:39,590 --> 00:01:41,110 I am a crazy shape. 67 00:01:41,360 --> 00:01:43,850 This morning, 68 00:01:41,360 --> 00:01:43,850 when I got out of bed, 69 00:01:41,360 --> 00:01:43,850 I just tipped forward 70 00:01:43,920 --> 00:01:45,650 like a poorly 71 00:01:43,920 --> 00:01:45,650 made bowling pin. 72 00:01:45,730 --> 00:01:48,360 And did I mention that 73 00:01:45,730 --> 00:01:48,360 my feet kill me all the time? 74 00:01:48,430 --> 00:01:49,900 Oh, let me rub them. 75 00:01:49,960 --> 00:01:51,160 Oh, wait. No. 76 00:01:51,230 --> 00:01:52,260 I read something 77 00:01:52,330 --> 00:01:53,320 on raddadsolutions.net 78 00:01:53,400 --> 00:01:54,600 that there's a pressure point 79 00:01:54,670 --> 00:01:56,330 in the foot that 80 00:01:54,670 --> 00:01:56,330 can induce labor. 81 00:01:56,440 --> 00:01:58,130 Oh, it doesn't matter. 82 00:01:56,440 --> 00:01:58,130 I don't care. 83 00:01:58,240 --> 00:02:00,640 I'm going to go choke 84 00:01:58,240 --> 00:02:00,640 down those horse pills 85 00:01:58,240 --> 00:02:00,640 I have to take every day. 86 00:02:00,780 --> 00:02:02,470 Oh, no, no. I'll cut 87 00:02:00,780 --> 00:02:02,470 them in half for you. 88 00:02:02,540 --> 00:02:04,010 And I will pour you a glass 89 00:02:04,110 --> 00:02:05,770 of flaxseed milk 90 00:02:04,110 --> 00:02:05,770 to wash it down. 91 00:02:05,950 --> 00:02:09,640 Everything is amazing. 92 00:02:05,950 --> 00:02:09,640 Today is perfect. 93 00:02:05,950 --> 00:02:09,640 And I love you. 94 00:02:10,250 --> 00:02:13,740 Chris is so wonderful 95 00:02:10,250 --> 00:02:13,740 and thoughtful and positive. 96 00:02:15,520 --> 00:02:17,390 He's driving me 97 00:02:15,520 --> 00:02:17,390 up the wall. 98 00:02:17,460 --> 00:02:18,550 Smoothie's ready! 99 00:02:21,030 --> 00:02:23,220 Opening this farmers market 100 00:02:23,300 --> 00:02:25,630 was one of 101 00:02:23,300 --> 00:02:25,630 my greatest achievements 102 00:02:23,300 --> 00:02:25,630 as city councilor. 103 00:02:25,770 --> 00:02:28,170 It's good for the economy, 104 00:02:25,770 --> 00:02:28,170 it's good for families, 105 00:02:28,240 --> 00:02:30,330 and it's good for promoting 106 00:02:28,240 --> 00:02:30,330 a healthy lifestyle. 107 00:02:30,400 --> 00:02:32,530 Which Pawnee 108 00:02:30,400 --> 00:02:32,530 desperately needs. 109 00:02:32,670 --> 00:02:36,170 Look at this tiny tree. 110 00:02:32,670 --> 00:02:36,170 Can you eat this? 111 00:02:36,740 --> 00:02:39,340 Aw, this one's dead. 112 00:02:41,150 --> 00:02:43,880 Hey, Connie Cabbage. 113 00:02:41,150 --> 00:02:43,880 What's good today? 114 00:02:43,950 --> 00:02:46,080 Green cabbage is 115 00:02:43,950 --> 00:02:46,080 always a safe bet. 116 00:02:46,150 --> 00:02:47,590 Red cabbage is good. 117 00:02:47,660 --> 00:02:49,020 I mean, you can't go wrong. 118 00:02:49,090 --> 00:02:51,120 That's the fun thing 119 00:02:49,090 --> 00:02:51,120 about cabbage. 120 00:02:51,190 --> 00:02:52,790 One of the fun things. 121 00:02:52,890 --> 00:02:53,880 Oh. 122 00:02:55,500 --> 00:02:58,630 Time to crank this 123 00:02:55,500 --> 00:02:58,630 market up a notch, y'all! 124 00:02:58,730 --> 00:02:59,930 "Chardbodies." 125 00:03:00,000 --> 00:03:01,490 "Get a chard on"? 126 00:03:01,570 --> 00:03:04,630 Let's get "recharded" in here! 127 00:03:04,740 --> 00:03:06,000 What the hell is going on? 128 00:03:06,070 --> 00:03:08,770 Oh, yeah. 129 00:03:06,070 --> 00:03:08,770 That's the new chard stand. 130 00:03:08,840 --> 00:03:11,310 I suppose that's one 131 00:03:08,840 --> 00:03:11,310 way to sell vegetables. 132 00:03:11,380 --> 00:03:15,040 We got Swiss chard! 133 00:03:11,380 --> 00:03:15,040 We got white chard! 134 00:03:11,380 --> 00:03:15,040 We got chard poppers! 135 00:03:15,120 --> 00:03:18,250 And for all you 136 00:03:15,120 --> 00:03:18,250 freaking vegans out there. 137 00:03:18,320 --> 00:03:21,350 We got chard shots! Yeah! 138 00:03:21,620 --> 00:03:24,290 Mmm, chard is so bitter. 139 00:03:24,490 --> 00:03:25,890 Ben, do something. 140 00:03:26,030 --> 00:03:27,220 What do you want me to do? 141 00:03:27,290 --> 00:03:28,590 Well, you're 142 00:03:27,290 --> 00:03:28,590 the city manager. 143 00:03:28,660 --> 00:03:30,600 Kick them out. They're 144 00:03:28,660 --> 00:03:30,600 violating every single 145 00:03:30,660 --> 00:03:32,570 one of the farmers 146 00:03:30,660 --> 00:03:32,570 market's rules 147 00:03:30,660 --> 00:03:32,570 of conduct. 148 00:03:32,670 --> 00:03:34,360 By rules of conduct, 149 00:03:32,670 --> 00:03:34,360 do you mean 150 00:03:34,440 --> 00:03:36,300 that wooden sign 151 00:03:34,440 --> 00:03:36,300 you made that says, 152 00:03:36,370 --> 00:03:37,840 "Peas be kind to others"? 153 00:03:37,910 --> 00:03:40,310 Yes. And, "In case of fire, 154 00:03:37,910 --> 00:03:40,310 romaine calm!" 155 00:03:40,370 --> 00:03:43,940 Um, and, 156 00:03:40,370 --> 00:03:43,940 "You won't bay leaf how nice 157 00:03:40,370 --> 00:03:43,940 olive our vendors are." 158 00:03:44,010 --> 00:03:45,950 I don't like vegetables, 159 00:03:44,010 --> 00:03:45,950 but I am very good 160 00:03:44,010 --> 00:03:45,950 at vegetable puns. 161 00:03:46,010 --> 00:03:48,110 Okay. I admit this 162 00:03:46,010 --> 00:03:48,110 is a little iffy... 163 00:03:48,180 --> 00:03:49,240 A little iffy? 164 00:03:49,320 --> 00:03:52,080 I can't do anything 165 00:03:49,320 --> 00:03:52,080 until I check the rules 166 00:03:49,320 --> 00:03:52,080 for city vendors. 167 00:03:52,390 --> 00:03:53,480 Cabbage. 168 00:03:53,850 --> 00:03:55,820 Come and get it. 169 00:03:55,890 --> 00:03:57,260 Connie, no. 170 00:03:57,320 --> 00:03:58,920 Put those away. 171 00:03:59,460 --> 00:04:02,360 April's sitting on my lap 172 00:04:02,430 --> 00:04:04,630 I shouldn't tell her that 173 00:04:02,430 --> 00:04:04,630 I've got to take a crap 174 00:04:04,700 --> 00:04:06,100 Oh, no 175 00:04:06,200 --> 00:04:07,190 Don't. 176 00:04:07,270 --> 00:04:08,260 I should just go 177 00:04:08,340 --> 00:04:09,960 Oh, my God! 178 00:04:08,340 --> 00:04:09,960 You play guitar? 179 00:04:10,040 --> 00:04:11,630 No, that's 180 00:04:10,040 --> 00:04:11,630 a super small piano. 181 00:04:11,710 --> 00:04:14,940 Okay, I'm going to need 182 00:04:11,710 --> 00:04:14,940 the sarcasm to take 183 00:04:11,710 --> 00:04:14,940 a long walk right now. 184 00:04:15,080 --> 00:04:16,630 My terrible nephew, 185 00:04:15,080 --> 00:04:16,630 Sebastian, 186 00:04:16,710 --> 00:04:18,340 is having his sixth birthday 187 00:04:16,710 --> 00:04:18,340 party this weekend, 188 00:04:18,410 --> 00:04:19,900 and the clown they 189 00:04:18,410 --> 00:04:19,900 hired has shingles. 190 00:04:20,080 --> 00:04:21,710 Do you think your band 191 00:04:20,080 --> 00:04:21,710 could play for an hour? 192 00:04:21,820 --> 00:04:23,310 How much? 193 00:04:21,820 --> 00:04:23,310 Seventy five. 194 00:04:23,420 --> 00:04:24,510 $75,000? 195 00:04:24,590 --> 00:04:25,580 How about $300? 196 00:04:25,650 --> 00:04:28,020 $300,000? 197 00:04:28,090 --> 00:04:29,150 $150. 198 00:04:29,220 --> 00:04:30,210 They'll do it. 199 00:04:30,290 --> 00:04:31,660 Ah, thank you. 200 00:04:30,290 --> 00:04:31,660 That is such a relief. 201 00:04:31,790 --> 00:04:34,230 I love my nephew very much, 202 00:04:31,790 --> 00:04:34,230 but he's a horrible 203 00:04:31,790 --> 00:04:34,230 little tyrant, 204 00:04:34,300 --> 00:04:36,230 so don't ruin 205 00:04:34,300 --> 00:04:36,230 this day for him! 206 00:04:36,830 --> 00:04:42,330 150 bucks? 207 00:04:36,830 --> 00:04:42,330 Split that four ways, 208 00:04:36,830 --> 00:04:42,330 boom, $600. 209 00:04:42,940 --> 00:04:44,770 I'll say it again. 210 00:04:42,940 --> 00:04:44,770 The men's room 211 00:04:44,840 --> 00:04:46,900 needs a separate 212 00:04:44,840 --> 00:04:46,900 dispenser for face wash. 213 00:04:46,970 --> 00:04:48,740 I can't wash my face 214 00:04:46,970 --> 00:04:48,740 with hand soap. 215 00:04:48,810 --> 00:04:50,470 Look at these pores. 216 00:04:48,810 --> 00:04:50,470 They're gaping. 217 00:04:50,780 --> 00:04:51,840 Hey, guys. 218 00:04:51,910 --> 00:04:54,210 Time out. 219 00:04:51,910 --> 00:04:54,210 Let's take a brief recess. 220 00:04:54,350 --> 00:04:55,480 Can we help you, Ann? 221 00:04:55,550 --> 00:04:57,580 I was looking for Leslie. 222 00:04:55,550 --> 00:04:57,580 But now I'm curious 223 00:04:57,650 --> 00:04:58,950 why you guys 224 00:04:57,650 --> 00:04:58,950 are sitting around 225 00:04:59,020 --> 00:05:00,820 doing nothing and 226 00:04:59,020 --> 00:05:00,820 getting drunk at work. 227 00:05:01,020 --> 00:05:02,610 It's the Whine and 228 00:05:01,020 --> 00:05:02,610 Cheese Club, gorgeous. 229 00:05:02,690 --> 00:05:04,490 It's a monthly 230 00:05:02,690 --> 00:05:04,490 gathering where we all 231 00:05:04,560 --> 00:05:06,320 get together and vent 232 00:05:04,560 --> 00:05:06,320 about what annoys us at work. 233 00:05:06,490 --> 00:05:08,830 Over fine wines and cheeses, 234 00:05:06,490 --> 00:05:08,830 of course. 235 00:05:09,060 --> 00:05:10,500 Larry! Salami! 236 00:05:10,760 --> 00:05:13,390 The Human Resources 237 00:05:10,760 --> 00:05:13,390 Department requires 238 00:05:13,470 --> 00:05:16,030 that I be available 239 00:05:13,470 --> 00:05:16,030 once a month to discuss 240 00:05:16,100 --> 00:05:18,970 workplace disputes 241 00:05:16,100 --> 00:05:18,970 with my employees. 242 00:05:19,040 --> 00:05:21,170 The rules do not 243 00:05:19,040 --> 00:05:21,170 specify whether 244 00:05:19,040 --> 00:05:21,170 or not I am 245 00:05:21,240 --> 00:05:24,580 allowed to listen 246 00:05:21,240 --> 00:05:24,580 to Willie Nelson 247 00:05:21,240 --> 00:05:24,580 on my headphones. 248 00:05:25,250 --> 00:05:27,840 Kyle parked his 249 00:05:25,250 --> 00:05:27,840 car in my spot again. 250 00:05:27,920 --> 00:05:29,280 Now, that is 251 00:05:27,920 --> 00:05:29,280 the fourth time this month. 252 00:05:29,350 --> 00:05:30,980 Hello, walls 253 00:05:31,050 --> 00:05:37,620 Hello... 254 00:05:31,050 --> 00:05:37,620 How'd things go for you today? 255 00:05:37,690 --> 00:05:39,660 I just want to choke 256 00:05:37,690 --> 00:05:39,660 him until he passes out. 257 00:05:39,790 --> 00:05:41,990 Time! 258 00:05:39,790 --> 00:05:41,990 This looks like fun. 259 00:05:39,790 --> 00:05:41,990 I want to try. 260 00:05:42,230 --> 00:05:44,560 Hmm, there's rules to this, 261 00:05:42,230 --> 00:05:44,560 sweet pea. 262 00:05:42,230 --> 00:05:44,560 It's Donna's turn next. 263 00:05:44,630 --> 00:05:47,500 I'll cede my time to Ann. 264 00:05:44,630 --> 00:05:47,500 I have a feeling this 265 00:05:44,630 --> 00:05:47,500 is going to be good. 266 00:05:47,600 --> 00:05:50,370 Okay. Well, I'm not 267 00:05:47,600 --> 00:05:50,370 going to talk for long, 268 00:05:47,600 --> 00:05:50,370 because I have to pee. Again. 269 00:05:50,440 --> 00:05:51,840 'Cause I have to 270 00:05:50,440 --> 00:05:51,840 pee every six minutes, 271 00:05:51,910 --> 00:05:53,840 because I have 272 00:05:51,910 --> 00:05:53,840 a beach ball 273 00:05:51,910 --> 00:05:53,840 in my stomach 274 00:05:53,910 --> 00:05:55,840 that's punching 275 00:05:53,910 --> 00:05:55,840 on my bladder. 276 00:05:55,910 --> 00:05:57,000 That sucks. 277 00:05:57,110 --> 00:05:59,080 I know. 278 00:05:57,110 --> 00:05:59,080 I'm never not hungry. 279 00:05:59,150 --> 00:06:01,210 Well, have some cheese. 280 00:05:59,150 --> 00:06:01,210 I can't have cheese, Larry! 281 00:06:01,280 --> 00:06:03,880 And I can't have wine either. 282 00:06:01,280 --> 00:06:03,880 I can't have anything good. 283 00:06:03,980 --> 00:06:06,920 You know what I can have, 284 00:06:03,980 --> 00:06:06,920 is liquefied flaxseed. 285 00:06:07,090 --> 00:06:08,820 But I don't want that. 286 00:06:07,090 --> 00:06:08,820 You know what I want? 287 00:06:08,890 --> 00:06:10,550 Pork rinds. 288 00:06:08,890 --> 00:06:10,550 I want jelly beans. 289 00:06:10,620 --> 00:06:13,360 And I want a huge trash bag 290 00:06:10,620 --> 00:06:13,360 filled with mashed potatoes. 291 00:06:13,430 --> 00:06:14,950 I want to be Pac-Man, 292 00:06:13,430 --> 00:06:14,950 and instead of dots, 293 00:06:15,030 --> 00:06:16,930 I want them to 294 00:06:15,030 --> 00:06:16,930 be cinnamon buns. 295 00:06:17,030 --> 00:06:19,060 I want to be 296 00:06:17,030 --> 00:06:19,060 a giant head 297 00:06:17,030 --> 00:06:19,060 and a mouth, 298 00:06:19,130 --> 00:06:21,830 and I just want to 299 00:06:19,130 --> 00:06:21,830 eat rows and rows 300 00:06:19,130 --> 00:06:21,830 of junk food pellets! 301 00:06:21,900 --> 00:06:24,500 And where's 302 00:06:21,900 --> 00:06:24,500 my trash bag 303 00:06:21,900 --> 00:06:24,500 of potatoes? 304 00:06:28,380 --> 00:06:29,500 Time. 305 00:06:29,580 --> 00:06:30,670 Yikes. 306 00:06:31,050 --> 00:06:33,140 Okay, 307 00:06:31,050 --> 00:06:33,140 Harrison Ford 308 00:06:31,050 --> 00:06:33,140 movie night. 309 00:06:33,280 --> 00:06:36,270 Before we do that, 310 00:06:33,280 --> 00:06:36,270 I was thinking more 311 00:06:33,280 --> 00:06:36,270 about that chard guy. 312 00:06:36,350 --> 00:06:39,050 I mean, it would be 313 00:06:36,350 --> 00:06:39,050 very easy for you to 314 00:06:36,350 --> 00:06:39,050 revoke their license. 315 00:06:39,190 --> 00:06:41,710 Okay, Leslie, 316 00:06:39,190 --> 00:06:41,710 this is city business. 317 00:06:41,990 --> 00:06:45,120 I'm not an emperor. 318 00:06:41,990 --> 00:06:45,120 I can't just kick 319 00:06:41,990 --> 00:06:45,120 them out for no reason. 320 00:06:45,190 --> 00:06:47,960 The reason is, 321 00:06:45,190 --> 00:06:47,960 it's vegetable porn. 322 00:06:45,190 --> 00:06:47,960 Porn on the cob. 323 00:06:48,400 --> 00:06:49,690 I'm sorry, I'm just 324 00:06:48,400 --> 00:06:49,690 very good at that. 325 00:06:49,830 --> 00:06:51,160 Look, I am not a prude. 326 00:06:51,230 --> 00:06:54,690 But, the point is people 327 00:06:51,230 --> 00:06:54,690 shouldn't be half-naked, 328 00:06:51,230 --> 00:06:54,690 you know, in public, 329 00:06:54,770 --> 00:06:57,740 in the middle of the day, 330 00:06:54,770 --> 00:06:57,740 in front of children. 331 00:06:54,770 --> 00:06:57,740 There's your reason. 332 00:06:57,910 --> 00:06:58,900 Kick them out! 333 00:06:58,970 --> 00:07:01,600 Look, now that 334 00:06:58,970 --> 00:07:01,600 we're working 335 00:06:58,970 --> 00:07:01,600 together again, 336 00:07:01,680 --> 00:07:04,240 maybe it would be good 337 00:07:01,680 --> 00:07:04,240 to keep our home life 338 00:07:04,310 --> 00:07:06,300 and our work life separate. 339 00:07:06,610 --> 00:07:09,610 Like, we only talk about 340 00:07:06,610 --> 00:07:09,610 work stuff when 341 00:07:06,610 --> 00:07:09,610 we're at City Hall. 342 00:07:09,680 --> 00:07:11,170 Like a firewall system. 343 00:07:11,290 --> 00:07:14,280 Yeah. 344 00:07:11,290 --> 00:07:14,280 Yeah, okay, 345 00:07:11,290 --> 00:07:14,280 that's smart. 346 00:07:14,360 --> 00:07:15,620 Home is home, 347 00:07:14,360 --> 00:07:15,620 and work is work. 348 00:07:15,690 --> 00:07:17,490 We can always talk 349 00:07:15,690 --> 00:07:17,490 about this tomorrow 350 00:07:15,690 --> 00:07:17,490 at the office. 351 00:07:17,560 --> 00:07:19,550 Good. I'm glad you agree. 352 00:07:19,630 --> 00:07:21,960 All right, 353 00:07:19,630 --> 00:07:21,960 Crystal Skull it is. 354 00:07:23,200 --> 00:07:25,860 No, it's ridiculous 355 00:07:23,200 --> 00:07:25,860 to think that you could 356 00:07:23,200 --> 00:07:25,860 survive a nuclear blast 357 00:07:25,930 --> 00:07:27,700 by jumping into 358 00:07:25,930 --> 00:07:27,700 a refrigerator. 359 00:07:27,800 --> 00:07:29,000 But still, it's like... 360 00:07:27,800 --> 00:07:29,000 Yeah, yeah. 361 00:07:29,070 --> 00:07:31,100 Titanium... 362 00:07:29,070 --> 00:07:31,100 Okay. So, 363 00:07:29,070 --> 00:07:31,100 I found the legal precedent 364 00:07:31,170 --> 00:07:33,040 to shut down those 365 00:07:31,170 --> 00:07:33,040 vegetable smut peddlers. 366 00:07:33,110 --> 00:07:34,470 What is happening? 367 00:07:34,610 --> 00:07:36,770 Firewall, man. We pulled 368 00:07:34,610 --> 00:07:36,770 into the parking lot, 369 00:07:36,840 --> 00:07:38,970 and this is technically 370 00:07:36,840 --> 00:07:38,970 City Hall property. 371 00:07:39,050 --> 00:07:40,610 So, now, we're at work. 372 00:07:39,050 --> 00:07:40,610 Let's do this. 373 00:07:40,680 --> 00:07:43,010 The farmers market 374 00:07:40,680 --> 00:07:43,010 is a community 375 00:07:40,680 --> 00:07:43,010 meeting place. 376 00:07:43,080 --> 00:07:44,450 And that 377 00:07:43,080 --> 00:07:44,450 pansexual stripper show 378 00:07:44,520 --> 00:07:45,950 basically negates 379 00:07:44,520 --> 00:07:45,950 the whole purpose. 380 00:07:46,050 --> 00:07:49,550 So, if you're looking 381 00:07:46,050 --> 00:07:49,550 for a reason to kick 382 00:07:46,050 --> 00:07:49,550 them out, here's 158. 383 00:07:49,690 --> 00:07:51,450 The new Farmers 384 00:07:49,690 --> 00:07:51,450 Market Rule Book. 385 00:07:51,560 --> 00:07:53,360 Okay. When did 386 00:07:51,560 --> 00:07:53,360 you make this? 387 00:07:53,430 --> 00:07:58,560 I stayed up all night. 388 00:07:53,430 --> 00:07:58,560 I also made these, 389 00:07:53,430 --> 00:07:58,560 Leslie's Toffee Surprise. 390 00:07:58,770 --> 00:08:01,070 The surprise is 391 00:07:58,770 --> 00:08:01,070 there's toffee 392 00:07:58,770 --> 00:08:01,070 in the inside. 393 00:08:01,170 --> 00:08:04,660 You can eat those 394 00:08:01,170 --> 00:08:04,660 once you revoke 395 00:08:01,170 --> 00:08:04,660 the chard vendor's license. 396 00:08:04,770 --> 00:08:06,670 Good day, colleague. 397 00:08:07,470 --> 00:08:08,770 Okay. 398 00:08:11,380 --> 00:08:13,010 Ann Perkins, 399 00:08:11,380 --> 00:08:13,010 how are you feeling? 400 00:08:13,080 --> 00:08:14,100 You don't want to know. 401 00:08:14,180 --> 00:08:15,550 It's all I want to know. 402 00:08:16,420 --> 00:08:17,940 All right, man. 403 00:08:16,420 --> 00:08:17,940 You asked for it. 404 00:08:18,020 --> 00:08:20,780 I have shooting pains 405 00:08:18,020 --> 00:08:20,780 that go all the way up 406 00:08:18,020 --> 00:08:20,780 from my butt to my neck. 407 00:08:20,920 --> 00:08:22,580 My stomach has so 408 00:08:20,920 --> 00:08:22,580 many stretch marks on it 409 00:08:22,660 --> 00:08:23,990 that it looks like 410 00:08:22,660 --> 00:08:23,990 an old-fashioned globe. 411 00:08:24,060 --> 00:08:25,390 My boobs are 412 00:08:24,060 --> 00:08:25,390 getting really sore. 413 00:08:25,460 --> 00:08:28,190 Also, I just read 414 00:08:25,460 --> 00:08:28,190 Brooke Shields' book 415 00:08:25,460 --> 00:08:28,190 on postpartum depression. 416 00:08:28,300 --> 00:08:31,230 Now, I have 417 00:08:28,300 --> 00:08:31,230 pre-postpartum 418 00:08:28,300 --> 00:08:31,230 depression anxiety. 419 00:08:31,870 --> 00:08:33,990 Well, never fear. 420 00:08:31,870 --> 00:08:33,990 I will get you Tylenol 421 00:08:34,070 --> 00:08:36,300 for your pain 422 00:08:34,070 --> 00:08:36,300 and shea butter 423 00:08:34,070 --> 00:08:36,300 for your belly. 424 00:08:36,370 --> 00:08:38,360 And your voluptuous 425 00:08:36,370 --> 00:08:38,360 figure only means 426 00:08:38,440 --> 00:08:41,030 your body is working exactly 427 00:08:38,440 --> 00:08:41,030 as nature intended it. 428 00:08:41,140 --> 00:08:43,110 Here. It's all good. 429 00:08:41,140 --> 00:08:43,110 Is that better? 430 00:08:43,240 --> 00:08:44,300 Yeah, thanks. 431 00:08:44,510 --> 00:08:46,450 I've been reading up 432 00:08:44,510 --> 00:08:46,450 on nipples. The reason 433 00:08:44,510 --> 00:08:46,450 that you're feeling 434 00:08:46,510 --> 00:08:48,410 nipple sensitivity is 435 00:08:46,510 --> 00:08:48,410 because your milk ducts 436 00:08:48,480 --> 00:08:50,010 in your nipples 437 00:08:48,480 --> 00:08:50,010 are opening up. 438 00:08:50,120 --> 00:08:51,750 Which is why I bought 439 00:08:50,120 --> 00:08:51,750 you this nipple kit. 440 00:08:51,850 --> 00:08:53,790 It's from Kernston's, 441 00:08:51,850 --> 00:08:53,790 the nipple people. 442 00:08:53,920 --> 00:08:55,950 It has nipple cream, 443 00:08:53,920 --> 00:08:55,950 nipple pads, and also, 444 00:08:56,020 --> 00:08:57,990 a special nipple 445 00:08:56,020 --> 00:08:57,990 pimple ointment 446 00:08:58,060 --> 00:08:59,720 in case you develop 447 00:08:58,060 --> 00:08:59,720 any pimples on 448 00:08:58,060 --> 00:08:59,720 your nipples. 449 00:08:59,830 --> 00:09:02,230 Oh, my God, you have to stop 450 00:08:59,830 --> 00:09:02,230 using the word "nipple!" 451 00:09:04,000 --> 00:09:06,330 Okay. Anyway, hopefully, 452 00:09:04,000 --> 00:09:06,330 that will help you 453 00:09:04,000 --> 00:09:06,330 with any sensitivity 454 00:09:06,400 --> 00:09:07,730 that may arise 455 00:09:06,400 --> 00:09:07,730 around your... 456 00:09:09,900 --> 00:09:11,340 Boob hats. 457 00:09:11,870 --> 00:09:13,200 Larry, get in there. 458 00:09:11,870 --> 00:09:13,200 Come on. 459 00:09:13,270 --> 00:09:14,570 I don't even know 460 00:09:13,270 --> 00:09:14,570 what we're doing. 461 00:09:14,640 --> 00:09:16,040 What is the meaning 462 00:09:14,640 --> 00:09:16,040 of this, nurse? 463 00:09:16,110 --> 00:09:17,670 Emergency Whine 464 00:09:16,110 --> 00:09:17,670 and Cheese Club. 465 00:09:17,850 --> 00:09:18,970 Put your headphones on, Ron. 466 00:09:19,050 --> 00:09:22,020 I have a lot of complaints. 467 00:09:19,050 --> 00:09:22,020 Sit down! I need to vent. 468 00:09:22,150 --> 00:09:25,450 And do not, 469 00:09:22,150 --> 00:09:25,450 under any circumstances, 470 00:09:22,150 --> 00:09:25,450 respond to anything I say. 471 00:09:25,520 --> 00:09:29,980 All right. 472 00:09:25,520 --> 00:09:29,980 Let's talk about vomit, kids. 473 00:09:25,520 --> 00:09:29,980 I do it all day long. 474 00:09:30,790 --> 00:09:33,820 It's super fun 475 00:09:30,790 --> 00:09:33,820 It feels super good 476 00:09:33,890 --> 00:09:40,860 I want to do it all the time 477 00:09:33,890 --> 00:09:40,860 Sex is cool 478 00:09:40,930 --> 00:09:45,960 Okay. Sex is Cool. 479 00:09:40,930 --> 00:09:45,960 Got that. I say we finish 480 00:09:40,930 --> 00:09:45,960 on Drunk Off Our Asses. 481 00:09:46,040 --> 00:09:48,410 And I think we 482 00:09:46,040 --> 00:09:48,410 should do Sex in Space. 483 00:09:48,510 --> 00:09:50,500 It's 20 minutes long. 484 00:09:48,510 --> 00:09:50,500 But it's really good. 485 00:09:50,580 --> 00:09:52,010 Babe? I don't think 486 00:09:50,580 --> 00:09:52,010 you should play 487 00:09:52,080 --> 00:09:53,810 any of those songs 488 00:09:52,080 --> 00:09:53,810 for a group 489 00:09:52,080 --> 00:09:53,810 of 6-year-olds. 490 00:09:54,010 --> 00:09:57,510 Whoa, wait. 6-year-olds? 491 00:09:54,010 --> 00:09:57,510 Did you book us 492 00:09:54,010 --> 00:09:57,510 a gig at a kid's party? 493 00:09:57,620 --> 00:09:59,090 You said we were 494 00:09:57,620 --> 00:09:59,090 playing in a festival. 495 00:09:59,150 --> 00:10:00,380 You said Dave Grohl 496 00:09:59,150 --> 00:10:00,380 might be there. 497 00:10:00,490 --> 00:10:04,120 Dave Grohl might be there. 498 00:10:00,490 --> 00:10:04,120 I don't know. 499 00:10:00,490 --> 00:10:04,120 He might be anywhere. 500 00:10:04,260 --> 00:10:06,060 That guy's awesome 501 00:10:04,260 --> 00:10:06,060 and he's unpredictable. 502 00:10:06,160 --> 00:10:08,490 No. No, I'm not playing 503 00:10:06,160 --> 00:10:08,490 for a bunch of screaming kids. 504 00:10:08,560 --> 00:10:10,690 Mouse Rat is a rock band. 505 00:10:08,560 --> 00:10:10,690 We're not The Wiggles. 506 00:10:10,760 --> 00:10:11,750 Come on! 507 00:10:11,830 --> 00:10:13,860 I'm sick of all the drama 508 00:10:11,830 --> 00:10:13,860 with this band. 509 00:10:14,200 --> 00:10:16,230 I quit. I'm going back 510 00:10:14,200 --> 00:10:16,230 to rabbinical school. 511 00:10:16,300 --> 00:10:18,360 Umbilical school? 512 00:10:18,440 --> 00:10:21,070 Rivers, come back. 513 00:10:18,440 --> 00:10:21,070 Rivers, don't do this. Hey! 514 00:10:21,140 --> 00:10:22,440 Shaq might be there! 515 00:10:23,910 --> 00:10:26,810 Hey. Did you get a chance 516 00:10:23,910 --> 00:10:26,810 to sign off on that 517 00:10:23,910 --> 00:10:26,810 booklet I gave you? 518 00:10:26,880 --> 00:10:28,140 Well, I read it. 519 00:10:28,220 --> 00:10:30,480 But it seems like 520 00:10:28,220 --> 00:10:30,480 your farmers market rules 521 00:10:30,550 --> 00:10:32,850 may be specifically 522 00:10:30,550 --> 00:10:32,850 targeting Chardbodies. 523 00:10:33,050 --> 00:10:34,950 What? How? 524 00:10:35,390 --> 00:10:37,550 "No visible cleavage. 525 00:10:35,390 --> 00:10:37,550 No strobe lights. 526 00:10:37,620 --> 00:10:39,720 "No chard-related innuendo." 527 00:10:39,830 --> 00:10:41,450 Those apply to all vendors. 528 00:10:41,530 --> 00:10:43,900 Either way, 529 00:10:41,530 --> 00:10:43,900 it's too late. The train 530 00:10:41,530 --> 00:10:43,900 has left the station. 531 00:10:43,960 --> 00:10:45,870 Okay. What train, 532 00:10:43,960 --> 00:10:45,870 from which station? 533 00:10:45,930 --> 00:10:47,800 You're revoking my license? 534 00:10:45,930 --> 00:10:47,800 Oh, boy. 535 00:10:47,870 --> 00:10:50,960 Yes, Nolan, under the auspices 536 00:10:47,870 --> 00:10:50,960 of the office of city manager, 537 00:10:51,040 --> 00:10:52,400 et cetera, et cetera, 538 00:10:51,040 --> 00:10:52,400 it's not important, 539 00:10:52,470 --> 00:10:54,100 you are in violation 540 00:10:52,470 --> 00:10:54,100 of many rules 541 00:10:54,170 --> 00:10:55,610 and, therefore, 542 00:10:54,170 --> 00:10:55,610 you cannot 543 00:10:54,170 --> 00:10:55,610 sell your goods 544 00:10:55,680 --> 00:10:57,040 anymore at 545 00:10:55,680 --> 00:10:57,040 the Pawnee Farmers Market. 546 00:10:57,110 --> 00:10:59,270 Ben, back me up on 547 00:10:57,110 --> 00:10:59,270 this without hesitation. 548 00:10:59,350 --> 00:11:01,250 Nolan, can I have a second 549 00:10:59,350 --> 00:11:01,250 to speak with my wife... 550 00:11:01,320 --> 00:11:02,980 With Ms. Knope, 551 00:11:01,320 --> 00:11:02,980 for a second? 552 00:11:03,120 --> 00:11:05,180 Look, chard is disgusting. 553 00:11:05,250 --> 00:11:07,740 You try selling it 554 00:11:05,250 --> 00:11:07,740 without sexy dancers. 555 00:11:05,250 --> 00:11:07,740 It's impossible. 556 00:11:07,890 --> 00:11:10,480 It's like, "Hey, 557 00:11:07,890 --> 00:11:10,480 you like lettuce? 558 00:11:07,890 --> 00:11:10,480 Try this. It's worse. 559 00:11:10,560 --> 00:11:12,220 "It tastes like kale 560 00:11:10,560 --> 00:11:12,220 took a dump on spinach." 561 00:11:12,330 --> 00:11:14,160 I like to think of 562 00:11:12,330 --> 00:11:14,160 it as celery with BO. 563 00:11:14,260 --> 00:11:16,590 But if it's so gross, 564 00:11:14,260 --> 00:11:16,590 you should just 565 00:11:14,260 --> 00:11:16,590 sell something else. 566 00:11:16,660 --> 00:11:19,000 I inherited this 567 00:11:16,660 --> 00:11:19,000 farm from my dad. 568 00:11:16,660 --> 00:11:19,000 It's all I have. 569 00:11:19,070 --> 00:11:20,970 Plus, the other 570 00:11:19,070 --> 00:11:20,970 vendors want me there. 571 00:11:19,070 --> 00:11:20,970 I'm good for business. 572 00:11:21,030 --> 00:11:25,170 We're not revoking 573 00:11:21,030 --> 00:11:25,170 your license for now. 574 00:11:21,030 --> 00:11:25,170 I am sorry you had to come in. 575 00:11:26,710 --> 00:11:27,700 Judas! 576 00:11:27,770 --> 00:11:29,500 I don't appreciate 577 00:11:27,770 --> 00:11:29,500 being ambushed, Leslie. 578 00:11:29,740 --> 00:11:30,970 Let's just go home. 579 00:11:29,740 --> 00:11:30,970 No. 580 00:11:31,040 --> 00:11:32,100 I know what 581 00:11:31,040 --> 00:11:32,100 you're trying to do. 582 00:11:32,210 --> 00:11:33,310 If we go home, 583 00:11:32,210 --> 00:11:33,310 the firewall is up 584 00:11:33,380 --> 00:11:34,780 and then you 585 00:11:33,380 --> 00:11:34,780 don't have to deal 586 00:11:33,380 --> 00:11:34,780 with me anymore. 587 00:11:34,850 --> 00:11:37,220 Instead, fellow employee, 588 00:11:34,850 --> 00:11:37,220 I will meet you 589 00:11:37,280 --> 00:11:39,840 in the basement 590 00:11:37,280 --> 00:11:39,840 conference room 591 00:11:37,280 --> 00:11:39,840 at 6:00 p.m. 592 00:11:40,150 --> 00:11:42,820 and we will solve 593 00:11:40,150 --> 00:11:42,820 this chard issue 594 00:11:40,150 --> 00:11:42,820 once and for all. 595 00:11:42,990 --> 00:11:44,580 Don't forget 596 00:11:42,990 --> 00:11:44,580 your approval pen. 597 00:11:44,660 --> 00:11:45,850 What? There's no such thing. 598 00:11:45,930 --> 00:11:48,520 Yes, there is. 599 00:11:45,930 --> 00:11:48,520 I made it for 600 00:11:45,930 --> 00:11:48,520 you last night. 601 00:11:50,160 --> 00:11:54,360 Ugh! And Lamaze class? 602 00:11:50,160 --> 00:11:54,360 Wait till I tell you 603 00:11:50,160 --> 00:11:54,360 about that Ponzi scheme. 604 00:11:55,100 --> 00:11:57,260 Oh, hey, Donna. 605 00:11:55,100 --> 00:11:57,260 What the hell? 606 00:11:57,340 --> 00:12:00,710 You know I can't 607 00:11:57,340 --> 00:12:00,710 be around smoke. 608 00:11:57,340 --> 00:12:00,710 Or fatty tuna. Ron! 609 00:12:00,970 --> 00:12:03,170 At first, this was funny, 610 00:12:00,970 --> 00:12:03,170 but it's gotten out of hand. 611 00:12:03,240 --> 00:12:06,910 This was our chance 612 00:12:03,240 --> 00:12:06,910 to vent about work, 613 00:12:03,240 --> 00:12:06,910 and you've taken it over. 614 00:12:07,010 --> 00:12:09,640 Yeah. It's Sushi 615 00:12:07,010 --> 00:12:09,640 and Cigar Club now. 616 00:12:09,920 --> 00:12:12,820 Wow, okay, 617 00:12:09,920 --> 00:12:12,820 I see how it is. 618 00:12:14,320 --> 00:12:15,410 I feel bad. 619 00:12:15,490 --> 00:12:16,510 I don't. This is a Cuban. 620 00:12:16,660 --> 00:12:18,520 This is yellowtail. 621 00:12:16,660 --> 00:12:18,520 I feel amazing. 622 00:12:18,590 --> 00:12:20,120 Whoa! 623 00:12:18,590 --> 00:12:20,120 Monster in the window! 624 00:12:20,190 --> 00:12:21,960 You know what 625 00:12:20,190 --> 00:12:21,960 my biggest complaint is? 626 00:12:22,060 --> 00:12:24,030 I have a million things 627 00:12:22,060 --> 00:12:24,030 I need to complain about, 628 00:12:24,100 --> 00:12:25,260 and I can't take them home 629 00:12:25,330 --> 00:12:27,130 because Chris is 630 00:12:25,330 --> 00:12:27,130 the most considerate 631 00:12:25,330 --> 00:12:27,130 person in the world. 632 00:12:27,200 --> 00:12:28,360 And he just 633 00:12:27,200 --> 00:12:28,360 wants to help me. 634 00:12:28,440 --> 00:12:29,490 And then, I feel 635 00:12:28,440 --> 00:12:29,490 bad about that. 636 00:12:29,570 --> 00:12:30,870 And then, 637 00:12:29,570 --> 00:12:30,870 I get annoyed 638 00:12:29,570 --> 00:12:30,870 that he wants 639 00:12:30,940 --> 00:12:32,530 to help me and I feel 640 00:12:30,940 --> 00:12:32,530 even worse about that. 641 00:12:32,610 --> 00:12:33,970 I thought you guys 642 00:12:32,610 --> 00:12:33,970 would be cool with me 643 00:12:34,040 --> 00:12:35,340 complaining since 644 00:12:34,040 --> 00:12:35,340 all you do is 645 00:12:35,410 --> 00:12:36,710 sit here and complain 646 00:12:36,780 --> 00:12:38,110 without judgment or guilt. 647 00:12:38,180 --> 00:12:40,110 But you know what? 648 00:12:38,180 --> 00:12:40,110 I guess I was wrong. 649 00:12:38,180 --> 00:12:40,110 And you know what? 650 00:12:40,180 --> 00:12:43,980 I would yell some more, 651 00:12:40,180 --> 00:12:43,980 but I think I just peed 652 00:12:40,180 --> 00:12:43,980 my pants a little bit. 653 00:12:44,580 --> 00:12:47,880 What's happening now? 654 00:12:44,580 --> 00:12:47,880 Is the nurse upset? 655 00:12:44,580 --> 00:12:47,880 I don't care. 656 00:12:49,420 --> 00:12:52,050 Okay, 6:00. 657 00:12:49,420 --> 00:12:52,050 Let's do this. Larry? 658 00:12:52,660 --> 00:12:54,590 Hey, Leslie. 659 00:12:52,660 --> 00:12:54,590 Ben couldn't make it, 660 00:12:54,660 --> 00:12:56,150 so he asked me 661 00:12:54,660 --> 00:12:56,150 to read you this, 662 00:12:56,230 --> 00:12:58,720 "Dear Honey." 663 00:12:56,230 --> 00:12:58,720 Aw, how sweet. 664 00:12:56,230 --> 00:12:58,720 Read. 665 00:12:59,770 --> 00:13:00,960 "Sorry, 666 00:12:59,770 --> 00:13:00,960 but I think we just 667 00:13:01,030 --> 00:13:02,400 "need to take a break 668 00:13:01,030 --> 00:13:02,400 from this work issue. 669 00:13:02,470 --> 00:13:04,130 "Please don't grind 670 00:13:02,470 --> 00:13:04,130 your teeth too hard 671 00:13:04,200 --> 00:13:05,800 "when you hear this. 672 00:13:04,200 --> 00:13:05,800 I will see you in the car. 673 00:13:05,870 --> 00:13:09,240 "I love you." Oh, 674 00:13:05,870 --> 00:13:09,240 that is so sweet that you 675 00:13:05,870 --> 00:13:09,240 still write love letters. 676 00:13:09,310 --> 00:13:10,570 Ahhh! 677 00:13:12,550 --> 00:13:14,040 What the hell are 678 00:13:12,550 --> 00:13:14,040 you doing out here? 679 00:13:14,150 --> 00:13:16,620 Sorry, babe. 680 00:13:14,150 --> 00:13:16,620 I am off City Hall 681 00:13:14,150 --> 00:13:16,620 property. 682 00:13:16,850 --> 00:13:18,680 You have to stop. 683 00:13:16,850 --> 00:13:18,680 Firewall. 684 00:13:18,820 --> 00:13:19,840 Wrong! 685 00:13:19,920 --> 00:13:21,580 All roads and bridges 686 00:13:19,920 --> 00:13:21,580 fall under the purview 687 00:13:21,660 --> 00:13:23,420 of the Pawnee 688 00:13:21,660 --> 00:13:23,420 Department 689 00:13:21,660 --> 00:13:23,420 of Transportation, 690 00:13:23,490 --> 00:13:25,860 which is located 691 00:13:23,490 --> 00:13:25,860 on the fourth 692 00:13:23,490 --> 00:13:25,860 floor of City Hall. 693 00:13:25,990 --> 00:13:29,430 Firewall down. 694 00:13:25,990 --> 00:13:29,430 Stay frosty, Wyatt. 695 00:13:29,500 --> 00:13:30,960 We're just getting started. 696 00:13:31,060 --> 00:13:33,760 Okay, well, 697 00:13:31,060 --> 00:13:33,760 that's interesting. 698 00:13:31,060 --> 00:13:33,760 You know why? 699 00:13:33,830 --> 00:13:35,060 Why? 700 00:13:33,830 --> 00:13:35,060 Because... 701 00:13:37,140 --> 00:13:38,330 Mother... 702 00:13:41,210 --> 00:13:42,230 Ha-ha! 703 00:13:42,310 --> 00:13:45,470 Bank! Private property. 704 00:13:42,310 --> 00:13:45,470 Firewall restored. 705 00:13:45,580 --> 00:13:48,050 Ha-ha-ha! The concrete 706 00:13:45,580 --> 00:13:48,050 that you're standing on 707 00:13:48,120 --> 00:13:50,850 was poured by a municipal 708 00:13:48,120 --> 00:13:50,850 construction crew. 709 00:13:54,090 --> 00:13:57,290 Private fountain. 710 00:13:54,090 --> 00:13:57,290 Private property. 711 00:13:54,090 --> 00:13:57,290 I'm safe. 712 00:13:57,360 --> 00:14:00,850 Guess where 713 00:13:57,360 --> 00:14:00,850 the water comes from. 714 00:13:57,360 --> 00:14:00,850 The Pawnee Reservoir. 715 00:14:02,600 --> 00:14:06,530 You can't escape 716 00:14:02,600 --> 00:14:06,530 City Hall, fool. 717 00:14:02,600 --> 00:14:06,530 Let's dance. 718 00:14:10,000 --> 00:14:11,100 Hey, friends. 719 00:14:11,170 --> 00:14:13,570 I'm just about to 720 00:14:11,170 --> 00:14:13,570 go on my night jog. 721 00:14:11,170 --> 00:14:13,570 Would you like to join me? 722 00:14:13,640 --> 00:14:14,900 Mmm, hard pass. 723 00:14:14,980 --> 00:14:17,100 We're here because 724 00:14:14,980 --> 00:14:17,100 you need to 725 00:14:14,980 --> 00:14:17,100 tend to your woman. 726 00:14:17,240 --> 00:14:20,080 She's complaining 727 00:14:17,240 --> 00:14:20,080 about everything, 728 00:14:17,240 --> 00:14:20,080 ruining Whine and Cheese Club. 729 00:14:20,150 --> 00:14:22,050 I literally have 730 00:14:20,150 --> 00:14:22,050 1,000 questions. 731 00:14:22,250 --> 00:14:23,380 Why is Ron wearing 732 00:14:22,250 --> 00:14:23,380 headphones? 733 00:14:23,480 --> 00:14:25,920 What is Whine and Cheese Club? 734 00:14:23,480 --> 00:14:25,920 And what is Ann 735 00:14:23,480 --> 00:14:25,920 complaining about? 736 00:14:26,020 --> 00:14:27,950 You, mostly. 737 00:14:26,020 --> 00:14:27,950 How you never let her vent 738 00:14:28,020 --> 00:14:30,290 because you're 739 00:14:28,020 --> 00:14:30,290 always too busy trying 740 00:14:28,020 --> 00:14:30,290 to solve everything for her. 741 00:14:30,360 --> 00:14:31,850 She's upset that 742 00:14:30,360 --> 00:14:31,850 I'm trying to help her? 743 00:14:31,930 --> 00:14:34,550 You've fallen into 744 00:14:31,930 --> 00:14:34,550 a classic trap, 745 00:14:31,930 --> 00:14:34,550 Christopher. 746 00:14:34,760 --> 00:14:36,700 Trying to fix 747 00:14:34,760 --> 00:14:36,700 a woman's problems 748 00:14:36,760 --> 00:14:38,630 instead of just listening 749 00:14:36,760 --> 00:14:38,630 to what they are. 750 00:14:38,700 --> 00:14:39,930 Why are you yelling? 751 00:14:40,000 --> 00:14:42,830 Tom put all my records 752 00:14:40,000 --> 00:14:42,830 into this rectangle. 753 00:14:43,070 --> 00:14:45,900 Hey, man. 754 00:14:43,070 --> 00:14:45,900 If Ann needs Tylenol, 755 00:14:43,070 --> 00:14:45,900 she can get it herself. 756 00:14:45,970 --> 00:14:48,840 What she needs from you 757 00:14:45,970 --> 00:14:48,840 is to just look 758 00:14:45,970 --> 00:14:48,840 her in the eyes, 759 00:14:48,910 --> 00:14:51,310 nod your head, 760 00:14:48,910 --> 00:14:51,310 and say those 761 00:14:48,910 --> 00:14:51,310 two magic words. 762 00:14:51,650 --> 00:14:53,240 That. Sucks. 763 00:14:54,110 --> 00:14:55,240 That sucks? 764 00:14:55,380 --> 00:14:56,510 I've spent 765 00:14:55,380 --> 00:14:56,510 my entire life reading 766 00:14:56,580 --> 00:14:57,950 instructional books 767 00:14:56,580 --> 00:14:57,950 about relationships, 768 00:14:58,020 --> 00:14:59,610 in order to trick 769 00:14:58,020 --> 00:14:59,610 women into liking me. 770 00:14:59,690 --> 00:15:01,310 When Ann tells you 771 00:14:59,690 --> 00:15:01,310 what's bothering her, 772 00:15:01,390 --> 00:15:02,550 don't try to fix it. 773 00:15:02,620 --> 00:15:05,850 Just say, 774 00:15:02,620 --> 00:15:05,850 "Damn, that sucks." 775 00:15:06,760 --> 00:15:09,160 The songs just play 776 00:15:06,760 --> 00:15:09,160 one right after the other. 777 00:15:09,230 --> 00:15:11,600 This is an excellent 778 00:15:09,230 --> 00:15:11,600 rectangle. 779 00:15:16,240 --> 00:15:17,430 Okay. This is insane. 780 00:15:17,800 --> 00:15:20,040 It is forty degrees 781 00:15:17,800 --> 00:15:20,040 and we are standing 782 00:15:17,800 --> 00:15:20,040 in freezing water. 783 00:15:20,110 --> 00:15:21,870 No, this is our motivation. 784 00:15:21,940 --> 00:15:23,500 We are not 785 00:15:21,940 --> 00:15:23,500 leaving this fountain 786 00:15:23,580 --> 00:15:25,170 until we've figured 787 00:15:23,580 --> 00:15:25,170 this out once and for all. 788 00:15:25,280 --> 00:15:27,040 Fine. Why are you not 789 00:15:25,280 --> 00:15:27,040 supporting me on this? 790 00:15:27,110 --> 00:15:28,380 I thought you 791 00:15:27,110 --> 00:15:28,380 agreed with me. 792 00:15:28,450 --> 00:15:30,310 I do, as a person. 793 00:15:30,380 --> 00:15:34,180 But as city manager, 794 00:15:30,380 --> 00:15:34,180 I'm not 100% sure 795 00:15:30,380 --> 00:15:34,180 you have a case. 796 00:15:34,290 --> 00:15:36,150 You're not 797 00:15:34,290 --> 00:15:36,150 listening 798 00:15:34,290 --> 00:15:36,150 to my side. 799 00:15:36,220 --> 00:15:38,450 I mean, 800 00:15:36,220 --> 00:15:38,450 sometimes when we disagree, 801 00:15:36,220 --> 00:15:38,450 you're so passionate 802 00:15:38,530 --> 00:15:40,430 I feel like 803 00:15:38,530 --> 00:15:40,430 I'm arguing 804 00:15:38,530 --> 00:15:40,430 with the sun. 805 00:15:40,490 --> 00:15:43,590 What? That is totally crazy! 806 00:15:40,490 --> 00:15:43,590 I am super chill all the time. 807 00:15:45,970 --> 00:15:48,600 Look, let's just admit it. 808 00:15:45,970 --> 00:15:48,600 We're in a weird position. 809 00:15:48,740 --> 00:15:52,000 We're married, 810 00:15:48,740 --> 00:15:52,000 our professional status 811 00:15:48,740 --> 00:15:52,000 has flipped, like, five times. 812 00:15:52,070 --> 00:15:53,400 I mean, now, 813 00:15:52,070 --> 00:15:53,400 I'm your boss. 814 00:15:54,210 --> 00:15:56,540 This is "uncharded" 815 00:15:54,210 --> 00:15:56,540 territory for us. 816 00:15:56,810 --> 00:15:59,010 Oh! That's nice. 817 00:15:59,110 --> 00:16:01,170 Thanks. 818 00:15:59,110 --> 00:16:01,170 I learned from the best. 819 00:16:01,250 --> 00:16:03,620 The point is, 820 00:16:01,250 --> 00:16:03,620 forget firewalls. 821 00:16:03,950 --> 00:16:07,250 Let's just be respectful 822 00:16:03,950 --> 00:16:07,250 and communicate, 823 00:16:07,320 --> 00:16:08,850 and we'll find 824 00:16:07,320 --> 00:16:08,850 the right balance. 825 00:16:08,960 --> 00:16:12,620 You're right. 826 00:16:08,960 --> 00:16:12,620 I'm sorry. I should have 827 00:16:08,960 --> 00:16:12,620 considered your side. 828 00:16:13,190 --> 00:16:15,560 I love you, 829 00:16:13,190 --> 00:16:15,560 and you're also 830 00:16:13,190 --> 00:16:15,560 a very smart person. 831 00:16:19,800 --> 00:16:20,930 Let's get out 832 00:16:19,800 --> 00:16:20,930 of this fountain. 833 00:16:21,000 --> 00:16:22,130 I can't because 834 00:16:21,000 --> 00:16:22,130 my legs are numb. 835 00:16:22,240 --> 00:16:23,260 Yeah, I can't move. 836 00:16:23,340 --> 00:16:25,030 Are we going to die here? 837 00:16:23,340 --> 00:16:25,030 Yeah. 838 00:16:25,540 --> 00:16:27,370 No, don't do that. 839 00:16:25,540 --> 00:16:27,370 I don't like this game. 840 00:16:27,440 --> 00:16:29,170 I don't know 841 00:16:27,440 --> 00:16:29,170 what the rules are. 842 00:16:29,240 --> 00:16:30,470 Okay, babe, 843 00:16:29,240 --> 00:16:30,470 here's what I did. 844 00:16:30,540 --> 00:16:32,710 Tell me if this 845 00:16:30,540 --> 00:16:32,710 is appropriate 846 00:16:30,540 --> 00:16:32,710 for a kids' song. 847 00:16:32,780 --> 00:16:35,270 I changed the lyrics 848 00:16:32,780 --> 00:16:35,270 in Sex Hair to... 849 00:16:35,350 --> 00:16:39,510 You've got sex bears 850 00:16:35,350 --> 00:16:39,510 You got them from me, kids 851 00:16:39,590 --> 00:16:42,720 It's sex bears 852 00:16:39,590 --> 00:16:42,720 Big old sex bears 853 00:16:42,790 --> 00:16:45,280 Andy, the word "hair" was 854 00:16:42,790 --> 00:16:45,280 not the problem with Sex Hair. 855 00:16:46,260 --> 00:16:50,360 The word "sex". 856 00:16:46,260 --> 00:16:50,360 Crap! What the hell 857 00:16:46,260 --> 00:16:50,360 am I supposed to sing? 858 00:16:50,430 --> 00:16:52,560 It's time, Andrew. 859 00:16:50,430 --> 00:16:52,560 These kids are tearing 860 00:16:50,430 --> 00:16:52,560 my house apart, 861 00:16:52,630 --> 00:16:54,290 and I need you to calm them 862 00:16:52,630 --> 00:16:54,290 with the power of song. 863 00:16:54,370 --> 00:16:57,770 Oh, gosh, here's the thing. 864 00:16:54,370 --> 00:16:57,770 I can't do it. 865 00:16:54,370 --> 00:16:57,770 I've got laryngitis. 866 00:16:58,340 --> 00:17:01,370 You will not bail 867 00:16:58,340 --> 00:17:01,370 on me, Andrew Dwyer. 868 00:16:58,340 --> 00:17:01,370 You will perform. 869 00:17:01,510 --> 00:17:03,240 My nephew is something 870 00:17:01,510 --> 00:17:03,240 of an outcast at his school, 871 00:17:03,310 --> 00:17:05,910 and I got Erica 872 00:17:03,310 --> 00:17:05,910 Swarvane to come, 873 00:17:03,310 --> 00:17:05,910 which is a huge get. 874 00:17:05,980 --> 00:17:07,210 She rules the first grade. 875 00:17:07,280 --> 00:17:10,310 And this party will 876 00:17:07,280 --> 00:17:10,310 determine his social status 877 00:17:07,280 --> 00:17:10,310 for the next 100 years! 878 00:17:10,380 --> 00:17:12,720 So, you better get out there 879 00:17:10,380 --> 00:17:12,720 or I am going to lose it! 880 00:17:12,820 --> 00:17:14,120 Have you not lost it? 881 00:17:14,190 --> 00:17:15,520 You don't even know! 882 00:17:15,720 --> 00:17:16,850 Babe, I'm freaking out. 883 00:17:16,920 --> 00:17:18,290 Listen to me. 884 00:17:18,590 --> 00:17:20,220 You make up songs 885 00:17:18,590 --> 00:17:20,220 all the time, 886 00:17:20,290 --> 00:17:22,090 off the top of your head. 887 00:17:20,290 --> 00:17:22,090 You do! 888 00:17:22,260 --> 00:17:25,720 You can do this. 889 00:17:22,260 --> 00:17:25,720 And afterwards, 890 00:17:22,260 --> 00:17:25,720 we can have cake. 891 00:17:25,830 --> 00:17:27,200 I already had cake. 892 00:17:27,270 --> 00:17:28,570 Andy! 893 00:17:30,440 --> 00:17:32,460 Okay, focus up, 894 00:17:30,440 --> 00:17:32,460 you little monsters! 895 00:17:32,640 --> 00:17:33,970 Not you, Erica. 896 00:17:32,640 --> 00:17:33,970 You're an angel, 897 00:17:34,040 --> 00:17:35,340 and we're 898 00:17:34,040 --> 00:17:35,340 thrilled you're here. 899 00:17:35,540 --> 00:17:38,770 Now. Is everyone ready 900 00:17:35,540 --> 00:17:38,770 to hear the best music 901 00:17:35,540 --> 00:17:38,770 you've ever heard 902 00:17:38,850 --> 00:17:40,210 in your miserable 903 00:17:38,850 --> 00:17:40,210 little lives? 904 00:17:40,280 --> 00:17:42,080 No! 905 00:17:42,150 --> 00:17:45,590 Okay. Then, ladies and 906 00:17:42,150 --> 00:17:45,590 gentlemen, please welcome... 907 00:17:46,190 --> 00:17:47,880 What even do 908 00:17:46,190 --> 00:17:47,880 you call yourself? 909 00:17:49,490 --> 00:17:56,260 Oh, too late! 910 00:17:49,490 --> 00:17:56,260 Please welcome Johnny Karate 911 00:17:49,490 --> 00:17:56,260 and His Magical Guitar Stick! 912 00:17:58,670 --> 00:17:59,720 Hey. 913 00:18:01,130 --> 00:18:05,160 It feels super good 914 00:18:01,130 --> 00:18:05,160 It's super fun 915 00:18:05,240 --> 00:18:09,140 I want to do it 916 00:18:05,240 --> 00:18:09,140 all the time 917 00:18:11,210 --> 00:18:12,680 Pick your nose 918 00:18:16,350 --> 00:18:20,290 Because boogers are gross 919 00:18:16,350 --> 00:18:20,290 Clean out your snout 920 00:18:22,690 --> 00:18:27,680 You can pick your nose 921 00:18:22,690 --> 00:18:27,680 with your smelly toes 922 00:18:27,860 --> 00:18:29,420 Ew! 923 00:18:30,600 --> 00:18:31,830 He's doing it! 924 00:18:32,300 --> 00:18:34,320 You're picking your 925 00:18:32,300 --> 00:18:34,320 nose and you put it 926 00:18:32,300 --> 00:18:34,320 on your friend! 927 00:18:34,400 --> 00:18:36,340 I started that. Great! 928 00:18:36,540 --> 00:18:39,470 Everybody pees the bed 929 00:18:39,810 --> 00:18:42,140 It's just something that we do 930 00:18:43,110 --> 00:18:45,910 I, for instance, 931 00:18:43,110 --> 00:18:45,910 peed the bed 932 00:18:46,310 --> 00:18:48,210 until I was thirty two 933 00:18:48,280 --> 00:18:49,410 Ew. 934 00:18:49,480 --> 00:18:52,480 Don't play with matches 935 00:18:49,480 --> 00:18:52,480 They're really not safe 936 00:18:52,590 --> 00:18:56,390 Your parents keep 937 00:18:52,590 --> 00:18:56,390 them in a drawer 938 00:18:52,590 --> 00:18:56,390 with twist ties and batteries 939 00:18:56,460 --> 00:18:57,980 My name is Bert Macklin. 940 00:18:58,090 --> 00:19:01,580 I investigate 941 00:18:58,090 --> 00:19:01,580 stinky feet for the FBI. 942 00:19:01,700 --> 00:19:05,720 Stinky feet patrol 943 00:19:07,930 --> 00:19:11,230 Stinky feet patrol 944 00:19:13,710 --> 00:19:15,070 This is so fun. 945 00:19:15,140 --> 00:19:18,240 I cannot believe this 946 00:19:15,140 --> 00:19:18,240 only cost me 150 bucks. 947 00:19:20,650 --> 00:19:22,140 Oh, hey! How was your day? 948 00:19:22,220 --> 00:19:23,620 It was okay. 949 00:19:24,150 --> 00:19:25,450 Now my legs really hurt. 950 00:19:25,520 --> 00:19:28,010 It's like I have 951 00:19:25,520 --> 00:19:28,010 a tension headache, 952 00:19:25,520 --> 00:19:28,010 but in my calves. 953 00:19:28,190 --> 00:19:30,160 A new surprise 954 00:19:28,190 --> 00:19:30,160 every day. 955 00:19:31,790 --> 00:19:32,880 That sucks. 956 00:19:32,960 --> 00:19:33,980 I know. 957 00:19:34,260 --> 00:19:38,390 And I'm so gassy. 958 00:19:34,260 --> 00:19:38,390 There's just been, like, 959 00:19:34,260 --> 00:19:38,390 a long, slow fart stream 960 00:19:38,470 --> 00:19:40,560 coming out of me 961 00:19:38,470 --> 00:19:40,560 since we started talking. 962 00:19:40,630 --> 00:19:41,760 This morning. 963 00:19:41,840 --> 00:19:43,000 That really sucks. 964 00:19:43,140 --> 00:19:47,700 Yeah, it does. Thanks. 965 00:19:49,840 --> 00:19:52,400 I'm sorry that 966 00:19:49,840 --> 00:19:52,400 I was trying to fix 967 00:19:49,840 --> 00:19:52,400 all your problems. 968 00:19:52,480 --> 00:19:56,540 Oh, God, don't apologize. 969 00:19:52,480 --> 00:19:56,540 I'm sorry I was such a freak. 970 00:19:57,380 --> 00:19:59,080 You're the nicest, 971 00:19:57,380 --> 00:19:59,080 most thoughtful 972 00:19:59,150 --> 00:20:00,920 baby-daddy 973 00:19:59,150 --> 00:20:00,920 a girl could ask for. 974 00:20:03,590 --> 00:20:04,580 That was incredible. 975 00:20:04,660 --> 00:20:07,130 You are overflowing with 976 00:20:04,660 --> 00:20:07,130 talent and I admire you. 977 00:20:07,430 --> 00:20:08,900 Excuse me. Mr. Karate? 978 00:20:08,960 --> 00:20:10,360 Mr. Karate? 979 00:20:10,430 --> 00:20:13,420 My son wants you to sing 980 00:20:10,430 --> 00:20:13,420 at his birthday 981 00:20:10,430 --> 00:20:13,420 party next weekend. 982 00:20:13,500 --> 00:20:14,730 Are you available? 983 00:20:14,800 --> 00:20:18,570 He is. But, it's actually 984 00:20:14,800 --> 00:20:18,570 $250 for short notice. 985 00:20:18,640 --> 00:20:21,070 You can call this number 986 00:20:18,640 --> 00:20:21,070 and ask for April Karate. 987 00:20:21,170 --> 00:20:22,370 Thanks, I will. 988 00:20:22,480 --> 00:20:23,940 Babe? 989 00:20:22,480 --> 00:20:23,940 My God. 990 00:20:24,010 --> 00:20:25,270 That was amazing. 991 00:20:25,350 --> 00:20:27,810 I kind of think 992 00:20:25,350 --> 00:20:27,810 you could make 993 00:20:25,350 --> 00:20:27,810 a career out of this. 994 00:20:28,250 --> 00:20:30,010 But, I mean, 995 00:20:28,250 --> 00:20:30,010 I don't know... 996 00:20:30,320 --> 00:20:32,150 What does that make me? 997 00:20:30,320 --> 00:20:32,150 A kids' performer? 998 00:20:32,220 --> 00:20:33,650 I'm supposed to 999 00:20:32,220 --> 00:20:33,650 be a rock star. 1000 00:20:33,750 --> 00:20:35,720 You just had fun in 1001 00:20:33,750 --> 00:20:35,720 there and made $150. 1002 00:20:35,790 --> 00:20:37,280 Who cares about what 1003 00:20:35,790 --> 00:20:37,280 you are supposed to be? 1004 00:20:37,920 --> 00:20:40,020 Yeah. 1005 00:20:37,920 --> 00:20:40,020 Plus, you have never 1006 00:20:37,920 --> 00:20:40,020 been sexier to me 1007 00:20:40,090 --> 00:20:41,720 than when you were singing 1008 00:20:40,090 --> 00:20:41,720 to those kids just now. 1009 00:20:41,830 --> 00:20:43,520 Really? 1010 00:20:41,830 --> 00:20:43,520 That's weird. 1011 00:20:45,400 --> 00:20:48,660 Nolan, I'm very 1012 00:20:45,400 --> 00:20:48,660 sorry that I overreacted 1013 00:20:45,400 --> 00:20:48,660 and overstepped my bounds. 1014 00:20:48,740 --> 00:20:49,760 I understand. 1015 00:20:49,840 --> 00:20:51,240 When I got into 1016 00:20:49,840 --> 00:20:51,240 the chard game, 1017 00:20:51,300 --> 00:20:52,770 I knew I'd ruffle 1018 00:20:51,300 --> 00:20:52,770 some feathers. 1019 00:20:52,970 --> 00:20:55,810 Sure. I'm just glad 1020 00:20:52,970 --> 00:20:55,810 that we could all 1021 00:20:52,970 --> 00:20:55,810 come to an agreement. 1022 00:20:55,880 --> 00:20:58,110 All right, everybody. 1023 00:20:55,880 --> 00:20:58,110 It is now 5:00 p.m. 1024 00:20:58,180 --> 00:21:00,310 Which means the farmers market 1025 00:20:58,180 --> 00:21:00,310 is closed. 1026 00:21:00,450 --> 00:21:04,710 And Farmers Market After Dark 1027 00:21:00,450 --> 00:21:04,710 is open for business! 1028 00:21:09,920 --> 00:21:11,390 Well, if this is 1029 00:21:09,920 --> 00:21:11,390 the way people 1030 00:21:11,460 --> 00:21:12,890 want to buy their produce, 1031 00:21:11,460 --> 00:21:12,890 so be it. 1032 00:21:12,990 --> 00:21:15,050 This town is 1033 00:21:12,990 --> 00:21:15,050 full of lunatics. 1034 00:21:19,200 --> 00:21:20,360 Ugh! 1035 00:21:20,430 --> 00:21:22,400 My God! 1036 00:21:20,430 --> 00:21:22,400 That was a terrible idea! 1037 00:21:22,500 --> 00:21:25,200 God, it's like 1038 00:21:22,500 --> 00:21:25,200 a tree barfed 1039 00:21:22,500 --> 00:21:25,200 in my mouth! 1040 00:21:25,410 --> 00:21:26,400 Ugh.