1
00:00:15,084 --> 00:00:17,084
Which brings us to 2005...
2
00:00:17,385 --> 00:00:19,685
The Circle Park renovation was complete,
3
00:00:19,986 --> 00:00:22,686
and a young man
named Thomas Haverford
4
00:00:22,787 --> 00:00:24,855
was still two years away
from getting hired.
5
00:00:24,923 --> 00:00:27,791
Perhaps we could skip ahead
and just hit the highlights?
6
00:00:27,859 --> 00:00:30,160
I mean, I planned
a comprehensive retrospective,
7
00:00:30,228 --> 00:00:32,329
but I guess I can just focus
on the really important moments.
8
00:00:32,397 --> 00:00:35,532
Ah! The debate about getting
a pod-based coffee machine.
9
00:00:35,600 --> 00:00:38,368
Garry and I wrote a little
musical number about that,
10
00:00:38,436 --> 00:00:40,938
and it goes a little something
like thi--
11
00:00:41,005 --> 00:00:42,405
Can't we just quickly
shake hands,
12
00:00:42,440 --> 00:00:43,574
pretend we like each other,
13
00:00:43,641 --> 00:00:45,121
- and get out of here?
- I'm all for that.
14
00:00:45,143 --> 00:00:47,611
No, April, Ron,
we need to celebrate everything
15
00:00:47,679 --> 00:00:49,146
that we've done together
as a group.
16
00:00:49,213 --> 00:00:50,747
This is our last day here!
17
00:00:50,815 --> 00:00:53,817
Who knows when we'll all be
together like this again?
18
00:00:53,885 --> 00:00:55,252
Excuse me.
Hi.
19
00:00:55,320 --> 00:00:56,653
There's a swing in a park
20
00:00:56,721 --> 00:00:59,022
near my house that's been broken
for about three months.
21
00:00:59,090 --> 00:01:00,791
Is it possible
to get that fixed?
22
00:01:00,859 --> 00:01:04,695
Anything is possible
if you follow your dreams.
23
00:01:04,763 --> 00:01:05,863
Johnny Karate.
24
00:01:05,930 --> 00:01:07,665
Except getting a swing fixed.
25
00:01:07,782 --> 00:01:09,262
None of us
actually work here anymore.
26
00:01:09,317 --> 00:01:11,185
Come back in two hours
when the office is open.
27
00:01:11,253 --> 00:01:13,320
- Thank you.
- Wait.
28
00:01:13,388 --> 00:01:15,890
Actually, sir, we can help.
29
00:01:15,957 --> 00:01:19,226
We can and we will because
when we used to work here,
30
00:01:19,294 --> 00:01:21,028
helping people was our job.
31
00:01:21,096 --> 00:01:22,429
Forget about these old stories.
32
00:01:22,497 --> 00:01:23,631
Let's make a new one.
33
00:01:23,698 --> 00:01:25,266
Let's fix a swing.
34
00:01:25,333 --> 00:01:26,934
One last ride
for the Parks and Rec gang.
35
00:01:27,002 --> 00:01:28,002
Who's in?
36
00:01:28,003 --> 00:01:29,170
Yeah.
37
00:01:29,237 --> 00:01:31,205
♪ The vote
was four to three ♪
38
00:01:31,273 --> 00:01:33,007
♪ Donna said to get rid of me
39
00:01:33,074 --> 00:01:34,475
♪ But Ron was suspicious
40
00:01:34,543 --> 00:01:36,610
♪ 'Cause my coffee
was delicious ♪
41
00:01:36,628 --> 00:01:38,629
Come on, Garry,
you're the mayor now.
42
00:01:38,697 --> 00:01:41,198
Have some dignity.
43
00:01:44,969 --> 00:01:49,809
Sync by Alice | Thank you honeybunny
www.addic7ed.com
44
00:02:01,370 --> 00:02:03,538
Okay, so what
is our first step
45
00:02:03,605 --> 00:02:05,273
on our quest to help this man?
46
00:02:05,340 --> 00:02:06,674
Does anyone remember?
47
00:02:06,742 --> 00:02:09,177
A parks and recreation
equipment requisition form.
48
00:02:09,244 --> 00:02:11,045
Correct.
Five points for Hufflepuff.
49
00:02:11,113 --> 00:02:12,613
Well,
everything's paperless now,
50
00:02:12,681 --> 00:02:15,450
and none of us has a log-in,
so can't access the computers.
51
00:02:15,517 --> 00:02:16,851
Hang on.
52
00:02:16,919 --> 00:02:19,787
I have one right here,
thanks to Leslie's scrapbook,
53
00:02:19,855 --> 00:02:22,223
"Thanks Form the Memories!"
54
00:02:22,291 --> 00:02:24,559
Oh, I knew those scrapbooks
were gonna come in handy.
55
00:02:24,626 --> 00:02:27,862
You came through
like you always do.
56
00:02:27,930 --> 00:02:29,130
God, I'm gonna miss you.
57
00:02:29,248 --> 00:02:31,549
Your confidence,
your joie de vivre,
58
00:02:31,617 --> 00:02:33,818
that crazy story about you
getting kicked out of En Vogue.
59
00:02:33,886 --> 00:02:36,120
Technically I kicked them out.
60
00:02:36,188 --> 00:02:37,388
When do you leave for Seattle?
61
00:02:37,456 --> 00:02:39,123
As soon as I get
my local real estate license.
62
00:02:39,191 --> 00:02:41,292
I'm married to a teacher,
and I love the man,
63
00:02:41,360 --> 00:02:43,695
but I also love diamond watches.
64
00:02:43,762 --> 00:02:45,196
Well, whatever happens,
65
00:02:45,264 --> 00:02:49,701
I know you are gonna live
an exciting and full life.
66
00:02:53,055 --> 00:02:57,759
3,400 square feet,
a beautiful view of Puget Sound,
67
00:02:57,827 --> 00:02:59,107
and if you look out this window,
68
00:02:59,128 --> 00:03:01,530
you can watch them build
the new Space Haystack
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00:03:01,597 --> 00:03:02,831
around the Space Needle.
70
00:03:02,899 --> 00:03:03,999
Wow.
71
00:03:04,066 --> 00:03:05,767
I-I can hardly see
the needle anymore.
72
00:03:05,835 --> 00:03:07,115
I know.
It's kind of the point.
73
00:03:07,170 --> 00:03:09,539
So what are we thinking?
74
00:03:10,606 --> 00:03:11,940
Wow.
75
00:03:12,008 --> 00:03:13,909
It sold in two hours?
76
00:03:13,976 --> 00:03:16,178
You cannot beat
the Seattle real estate market.
77
00:03:16,296 --> 00:03:18,176
I think it's all that coffee
and legal marijuana
78
00:03:18,197 --> 00:03:20,832
has people wanting to buy houses
quickly and irrationally.
79
00:03:20,900 --> 00:03:21,934
Mm.
80
00:03:22,001 --> 00:03:23,535
But the giant commission check
81
00:03:23,603 --> 00:03:27,205
has me thinking
about Donna-Joe Adventure Quest.
82
00:03:27,273 --> 00:03:29,041
Ooh, where are we going?
83
00:03:29,108 --> 00:03:30,709
Well, it can't beat last year.
84
00:03:30,777 --> 00:03:32,878
I mean, Middle Korea,
so beautiful.
85
00:03:32,996 --> 00:03:34,229
Here's my idea.
86
00:03:34,297 --> 00:03:35,631
- The Amazon.
- Oh.
87
00:03:35,699 --> 00:03:38,033
Three weeks of the best
and most expensive places
88
00:03:38,101 --> 00:03:40,035
South America has to offer.
89
00:03:40,103 --> 00:03:41,170
I love it.
90
00:03:41,237 --> 00:03:42,871
Honestly, with the way
work is going,
91
00:03:42,939 --> 00:03:44,573
I just need this right now.
92
00:03:44,641 --> 00:03:48,711
The school cut the math club
and math.
93
00:03:48,778 --> 00:03:50,713
They just don't teach math
anymore.
94
00:03:50,780 --> 00:03:53,349
Aw, my poor little
do-gooder teacher baby.
95
00:03:53,467 --> 00:03:56,035
Why don't we cuddle up
on the couch, watch a movie,
96
00:03:56,102 --> 00:03:58,871
and then maybe later
I'll wear that little red thing?
97
00:03:58,939 --> 00:04:00,339
Yes.
The red thing.
98
00:04:00,407 --> 00:04:02,475
Here, let me get this.
99
00:04:06,813 --> 00:04:09,348
Call Satan's niece.
100
00:04:09,416 --> 00:04:11,584
Hey, what do you want?
101
00:04:11,651 --> 00:04:14,987
And this is me DJ-ing
a boat party in Venezuela,
102
00:04:15,055 --> 00:04:16,989
kind of reminded me of the
two weeks you and I spent there.
103
00:04:17,057 --> 00:04:18,257
Oh, yeah, that happened.
104
00:04:18,325 --> 00:04:20,259
- Yeah, it did.
- April.
105
00:04:20,327 --> 00:04:21,627
What are you doing here?
106
00:04:21,695 --> 00:04:24,129
- Babe, have a seat.
- What's going on?
107
00:04:24,197 --> 00:04:26,398
Recently I was thinking
for the millionth time
108
00:04:26,466 --> 00:04:28,033
how lucky
I am to have found you,
109
00:04:28,101 --> 00:04:31,538
so I've decided
to treat yo' self.
110
00:04:32,356 --> 00:04:35,325
You're gonna buy me
a bunch of leather handbags?
111
00:04:35,442 --> 00:04:37,377
Donna is going
to take some of the money
112
00:04:37,444 --> 00:04:39,012
you usually use on your trips
113
00:04:39,079 --> 00:04:40,713
and establish
an education program
114
00:04:40,781 --> 00:04:42,315
through the foundation
I work for.
115
00:04:42,383 --> 00:04:44,617
It's called "Teach Yo' Self,"
and you and the other teachers
116
00:04:44,685 --> 00:04:46,552
will get money
for after-school programs,
117
00:04:46,620 --> 00:04:49,956
for music, art, math,
whatever you want.
118
00:04:50,024 --> 00:04:54,660
Baby, this is really generous,
but I love our trips,
119
00:04:54,728 --> 00:04:56,929
and honestly it's your money.
120
00:04:56,997 --> 00:04:58,431
You should spend it
how you want.
121
00:04:58,499 --> 00:04:59,732
This is what I want.
122
00:04:59,800 --> 00:05:01,567
I've had a lot of adventures.
123
00:05:01,635 --> 00:05:04,604
I single-handedly started
that doorknockers earring trend.
124
00:05:04,671 --> 00:05:06,572
I came in ninth
in Italy's Got Talent.
125
00:05:06,640 --> 00:05:08,908
- Yeah.
- I served on a NASCAR pit crew.
126
00:05:08,976 --> 00:05:13,580
I want a new kind of adventure,
and I want to take it with you.
127
00:05:13,998 --> 00:05:18,401
Okay, I feel like it's time
for me to get out of here.
128
00:05:20,037 --> 00:05:21,070
What is this mess?
129
00:05:21,138 --> 00:05:22,639
Why are you all in my office?
130
00:05:22,706 --> 00:05:25,441
We are on one last mission
to help the people of Pawnee.
131
00:05:25,509 --> 00:05:27,944
Craig, can you sign
the requisition form?
132
00:05:28,012 --> 00:05:29,245
It'd speed things up.
133
00:05:29,313 --> 00:05:31,233
You know, Craig,
when I first met you, I thought,
134
00:05:31,248 --> 00:05:33,016
"There's a man
who loves his job."
135
00:05:33,083 --> 00:05:35,919
And then I thought,
"Oh, wow, he's intense."
136
00:05:35,986 --> 00:05:38,555
And then I thought,
"Oh, no, he's insane.
137
00:05:38,673 --> 00:05:40,913
That person is psychotic,
and I need to call the police."
138
00:05:40,975 --> 00:05:43,109
Yeah, that's usually the way
it goes.
139
00:05:43,177 --> 00:05:46,179
But I just think
you've come so far,
140
00:05:46,247 --> 00:05:48,315
and I'm so glad
that we are leaving
141
00:05:48,382 --> 00:05:51,252
the Parks Department
in your hands.
142
00:05:52,219 --> 00:05:55,655
♪ Funny, though it's true
143
00:05:55,723 --> 00:05:59,225
♪ Those silly things you do
144
00:05:59,293 --> 00:06:04,197
♪ They only bring me closer
145
00:06:04,265 --> 00:06:08,868
♪ To you
146
00:06:11,806 --> 00:06:13,073
Nice crooning, buddy.
147
00:06:13,141 --> 00:06:15,976
The gentleman
over by the bar there
148
00:06:16,044 --> 00:06:17,477
sent you over
this glass of wine
149
00:06:17,545 --> 00:06:19,846
and his business card.
150
00:06:21,783 --> 00:06:24,851
Okay, so as you all know,
Tom's Bistro...
151
00:06:24,919 --> 00:06:27,421
Okay, fine.
152
00:06:27,539 --> 00:06:29,340
We are gathered here today
153
00:06:29,407 --> 00:06:32,810
to join Craig Middlebrooks
and Typhoon Montalban
154
00:06:32,877 --> 00:06:34,144
in holy matrimony.
155
00:06:34,212 --> 00:06:36,080
I don't know about this.
I'm very scared.
156
00:06:36,147 --> 00:06:37,848
Oh, just relax,
you nervous Nelly.
157
00:06:37,916 --> 00:06:38,916
You're right.
158
00:06:38,917 --> 00:06:40,317
We love each other,
159
00:06:40,385 --> 00:06:42,720
and the tax break
is substantial.
160
00:06:42,787 --> 00:06:45,589
Will the best man
please present the rings?
161
00:06:45,657 --> 00:06:47,725
Good luck, you two.
162
00:06:51,296 --> 00:06:55,432
Typhoon, my love,
happy anniversary.
163
00:06:55,500 --> 00:06:57,001
Do you have any regrets?
164
00:06:57,068 --> 00:06:59,370
Not one.
Not a single one.
165
00:06:59,437 --> 00:07:00,637
Do you have any regrets?
166
00:07:00,705 --> 00:07:02,573
Are you kidding?
Thousands.
167
00:07:02,640 --> 00:07:04,775
Most recently this trout!
168
00:07:06,644 --> 00:07:09,480
Okay, April and Andy,
I need to file this.
169
00:07:09,547 --> 00:07:12,049
Would anyone like to accompany
me to the fourth floor?
170
00:07:12,117 --> 00:07:13,717
One last journey
to the weirdest place on earth?
171
00:07:13,785 --> 00:07:14,818
- Yes.
- Shotgun!
172
00:07:14,886 --> 00:07:16,153
We--we're just taking
the elevator.
173
00:07:16,221 --> 00:07:17,661
I get to push buttons.
I called it.
174
00:07:17,722 --> 00:07:18,856
Oh--
175
00:07:18,923 --> 00:07:20,483
- He called it.
- Yeah, I know, I heard.
176
00:07:23,674 --> 00:07:26,677
Ethel Beavers,
we need this filed, please.
177
00:07:26,745 --> 00:07:28,546
We've gone digital.
178
00:07:28,614 --> 00:07:30,515
Get with the times,
you Luddite.
179
00:07:30,532 --> 00:07:32,266
Man,
of all the places in Pawnee,
180
00:07:32,334 --> 00:07:34,068
I'm gonna miss the fourth floor
the most.
181
00:07:34,136 --> 00:07:38,106
The disturbing murals,
the ominous lighting...
182
00:07:38,173 --> 00:07:39,340
the creepy people.
183
00:07:39,408 --> 00:07:40,475
Hi, April.
184
00:07:40,542 --> 00:07:42,377
I'm gonna miss the food
in Pawnee.
185
00:07:42,444 --> 00:07:45,246
Taco Bell, KFC, Pizza Hut,
186
00:07:45,314 --> 00:07:47,448
and most of all,
I'm gonna miss you, Leslie.
187
00:07:47,516 --> 00:07:49,484
Aw, Andy,
all of those things,
188
00:07:49,551 --> 00:07:53,154
including me, will still
be with you in Washington.
189
00:07:53,222 --> 00:07:54,689
That is a beautiful sentiment.
190
00:07:54,757 --> 00:07:56,658
It--I just want to say
191
00:07:56,726 --> 00:07:59,794
that we are about to embark
on an amazing adventure,
192
00:07:59,862 --> 00:08:01,763
and whatever happens,
193
00:08:01,831 --> 00:08:04,799
just know that Ben and I
are always there for you.
194
00:08:08,871 --> 00:08:10,839
Agent Macklin, I need you.
195
00:08:10,907 --> 00:08:12,307
Some thieves
are trying to steal
196
00:08:12,375 --> 00:08:14,042
the legendary
Snakehole Sapphire.
197
00:08:14,110 --> 00:08:16,011
What the--
No!
198
00:08:16,078 --> 00:08:17,612
That sapphire has the power
to activate
199
00:08:17,680 --> 00:08:19,214
the Cuban Missile Crisis.
200
00:08:19,282 --> 00:08:22,217
Damn it, Macklin!
I love it when you take charge.
201
00:08:22,285 --> 00:08:25,020
Make love to me, you fool,
you animal!
202
00:08:27,157 --> 00:08:29,558
Okay, rain-check that,
all right?
203
00:08:29,626 --> 00:08:30,994
They're here.
204
00:08:31,661 --> 00:08:33,095
Trick or treat!
205
00:08:33,163 --> 00:08:35,231
Oh!
Look at them!
206
00:08:35,298 --> 00:08:36,966
Here you go,
you little monsters.
207
00:08:37,033 --> 00:08:39,134
I love this.
You guys are the best.
208
00:08:39,202 --> 00:08:41,237
My love, we have to go.
209
00:08:41,304 --> 00:08:43,472
Just put all the candy in a bowl
or something.
210
00:08:44,040 --> 00:08:45,074
What's wrong?
211
00:08:45,141 --> 00:08:46,976
- Did you eat all the candy?
- No.
212
00:08:47,043 --> 00:08:48,043
- Did you?
- Yes.
213
00:08:48,111 --> 00:08:49,278
But that's not what's wrong.
214
00:08:49,346 --> 00:08:53,215
It's just, seeing all those kids
out there...
215
00:08:53,283 --> 00:08:54,785
Babe...
216
00:08:56,153 --> 00:08:58,220
I want to put a babe
in you, babe.
217
00:08:58,288 --> 00:09:00,356
Andy, you know
where I stand on this.
218
00:09:00,424 --> 00:09:02,825
Yes, I would love
all the awesome stuff
219
00:09:02,893 --> 00:09:03,926
my body would go through.
220
00:09:03,994 --> 00:09:05,862
I mean,
if all it meant was puking
221
00:09:05,929 --> 00:09:08,798
and getting weird stretch marks
and veins everywhere,
222
00:09:08,866 --> 00:09:10,166
then sign me up.
223
00:09:10,234 --> 00:09:13,202
But at the end, we've brought
a child into the world.
224
00:09:13,270 --> 00:09:14,704
- That's disgusting.
- No.
225
00:09:14,772 --> 00:09:15,938
They wipe all
of the disgusting stuff
226
00:09:16,006 --> 00:09:17,608
off of it immediately.
227
00:09:18,676 --> 00:09:19,709
We're gonna be late
for dinner.
228
00:09:19,777 --> 00:09:22,012
- Okay.
- Let's go.
229
00:09:22,480 --> 00:09:23,646
- Hey.
- Come on in.
230
00:09:23,714 --> 00:09:26,216
Hey, always nice to see
Janet Snakehole
231
00:09:26,283 --> 00:09:28,184
and Burt Macklin in the mix.
232
00:09:28,252 --> 00:09:29,412
What are you guys dressed as?
233
00:09:29,453 --> 00:09:32,823
Oh, I'm Sandra Dee O'Connor.
Get it?
234
00:09:32,890 --> 00:09:35,292
Sandra Dee
plus Sandra Day O'Connor?
235
00:09:35,359 --> 00:09:37,527
- Who's Sandra Dee?
- Who's Sandra Day O'Connor?
236
00:09:37,595 --> 00:09:38,929
Forget it.
237
00:09:38,996 --> 00:09:41,698
And I am the Lamplighter,
238
00:09:41,766 --> 00:09:44,067
a character
from my new board game sequel,
239
00:09:44,135 --> 00:09:47,037
"Cones of Dunshire:
Winds of Tremorrah."
240
00:09:47,105 --> 00:09:51,608
Gameplay Magazine called it
"punishingly intricate."
241
00:09:51,676 --> 00:09:53,110
Hey, where are the kids at?
242
00:09:53,177 --> 00:09:54,878
I want to say hi and wrestle
all three of them at once.
243
00:09:54,946 --> 00:09:57,481
Oh, they're trick-or-treating
in Georgetown with some friends.
244
00:09:57,548 --> 00:10:00,617
It's just us grown-ups tonight,
no kids at all.
245
00:10:06,391 --> 00:10:09,694
Hey, Andy, why don't you
give me a hand in the kitchen?
246
00:10:10,762 --> 00:10:13,096
So what do you need
a hand with?
247
00:10:13,164 --> 00:10:16,533
Oh, no, I just thought
you might want to talk.
248
00:10:16,601 --> 00:10:19,603
Whoa.
Dude, that's really slick.
249
00:10:20,171 --> 00:10:23,207
Oh, man, that's some
secret agent stuff right there.
250
00:10:23,475 --> 00:10:25,643
So April's still
on the fence about kids, huh?
251
00:10:25,710 --> 00:10:27,945
Yeah,
and I'm freaking out, man.
252
00:10:28,013 --> 00:10:29,780
I want kids so bad.
253
00:10:29,848 --> 00:10:31,715
You know,
yesterday I was at the park,
254
00:10:31,783 --> 00:10:33,703
and I saw this group
of eight-year-olds laughing,
255
00:10:33,752 --> 00:10:35,653
playing, having a good time.
256
00:10:35,720 --> 00:10:37,788
I almost started crying.
257
00:10:37,856 --> 00:10:39,256
Granted, I'd just face-planted
on my rollerblades.
258
00:10:39,324 --> 00:10:40,724
That's what
they were laughing at.
259
00:10:40,792 --> 00:10:42,693
Sure.
260
00:10:42,761 --> 00:10:45,095
- All right, go ahead.
- What?
261
00:10:45,163 --> 00:10:47,303
You're gonna lecture me about
how Andy and I should have kids.
262
00:10:47,332 --> 00:10:48,699
You're gonna be like,
"They're so great.
263
00:10:48,767 --> 00:10:50,902
"They change your life,
and yes, they drive you nuts,
264
00:10:50,969 --> 00:10:53,304
"but it's all worth it
for the beauty and the majesty
265
00:10:53,372 --> 00:10:55,172
"and the glory of their little
faces in the morning.
266
00:10:55,240 --> 00:10:56,507
Blah, blah, blah, and barf."
267
00:10:56,575 --> 00:10:57,842
You know why it's so unfair?
268
00:10:57,910 --> 00:10:59,377
Because you guys got so lucky.
269
00:10:59,444 --> 00:11:01,579
You had sex one time,
and you had three kids,
270
00:11:01,647 --> 00:11:04,682
and they're all, like,
smart and great and healthy,
271
00:11:04,750 --> 00:11:06,084
and now your lives are perfect.
272
00:11:06,151 --> 00:11:07,585
But our life
is pretty perfect already.
273
00:11:07,653 --> 00:11:10,088
And you know what, kids act
the opposite of their parents.
274
00:11:10,155 --> 00:11:11,489
That's why your kids
are so cool.
275
00:11:11,557 --> 00:11:12,837
But Andy and I are cool already,
276
00:11:12,891 --> 00:11:14,859
so our kids will be,
like, really lame and weird.
277
00:11:14,927 --> 00:11:16,995
I'm sorry.
I just don't know what to do.
278
00:11:17,062 --> 00:11:19,764
Please tell me what to do.
What do I do?
279
00:11:19,832 --> 00:11:22,166
It's not about trying
to make your life perfect.
280
00:11:22,234 --> 00:11:24,836
Nobody's lives are perfect.
281
00:11:24,903 --> 00:11:29,107
You have kids
because you and Andy are a team
282
00:11:29,174 --> 00:11:31,109
and you want to bring in
some new team members.
283
00:11:31,176 --> 00:11:33,044
So you think we should?
284
00:11:33,112 --> 00:11:34,552
I don't know
if you should have kids.
285
00:11:34,613 --> 00:11:35,914
I really don't.
286
00:11:35,981 --> 00:11:38,651
But I do like your team.
287
00:11:39,618 --> 00:11:42,988
All right, Ms. Ludgate,
we're getting close.
288
00:11:43,056 --> 00:11:44,656
Babe, you look
more beautiful right now
289
00:11:44,724 --> 00:11:46,191
than I have ever seen you.
290
00:11:46,559 --> 00:11:47,592
Wow.
291
00:11:47,660 --> 00:11:50,395
Just your luck that you're going
into labor on Halloween.
292
00:11:50,463 --> 00:11:52,831
Can I get a warm towel
to get that makeup off?
293
00:11:52,899 --> 00:11:55,534
No! I want it on!
That's the whole point.
294
00:11:55,601 --> 00:11:57,769
I put the makeup on
after I went into labor.
295
00:11:57,837 --> 00:11:59,404
Whatever blows your skirt up.
296
00:11:59,472 --> 00:12:01,773
Okay, you ready to push?
297
00:12:01,841 --> 00:12:04,342
Wait, no.
Babe, my birth mix.
298
00:12:04,410 --> 00:12:06,545
♪ He did the mash
299
00:12:06,612 --> 00:12:08,580
Here comes a contraction.
Are you ready?
300
00:12:08,648 --> 00:12:10,248
Okay, I'm ready.
Let's do this.
301
00:12:10,316 --> 00:12:12,684
- ♪ It was a graveyard smash
- ♪ He did the mash
302
00:12:12,752 --> 00:12:14,486
♪ It caught on in a flash
303
00:12:14,554 --> 00:12:16,221
♪ He did the mash
304
00:12:16,289 --> 00:12:18,056
♪ He did the monster mash
305
00:12:18,124 --> 00:12:21,560
♪ From my laboratory
in the castle east ♪
306
00:12:21,627 --> 00:12:23,428
Burt Macklin Junior?
307
00:12:23,496 --> 00:12:25,464
Mm, we need a Halloween angle.
308
00:12:25,531 --> 00:12:30,135
How about...
Demon Spawn Baby Satan Dwyer?
309
00:12:30,203 --> 00:12:31,670
Oh, I like that.
Yeah.
310
00:12:31,737 --> 00:12:33,705
Or maybe
311
00:12:33,773 --> 00:12:39,244
Burt Snakehole Ludgate
Karate Dracula Macklin
312
00:12:39,312 --> 00:12:40,579
Demon Jack-o-Lantern Dwyer?
313
00:12:40,646 --> 00:12:42,314
We call him "Jack"
for short.
314
00:12:42,382 --> 00:12:43,682
Hey. Hi.
315
00:12:43,750 --> 00:12:44,950
Oh, I want to scream,
316
00:12:45,018 --> 00:12:46,285
but I don't want
to wake up my godchild.
317
00:12:46,353 --> 00:12:47,586
I'm assuming
it's my godchild, right?
318
00:12:47,654 --> 00:12:49,414
- We can talk about it later.
- Congrats, guys.
319
00:12:49,422 --> 00:12:51,190
I know it came
unexpectedly early,
320
00:12:51,258 --> 00:12:52,558
but pretty cool he was born
in Pawnee.
321
00:12:52,626 --> 00:12:53,926
Where do I put these?
322
00:12:53,994 --> 00:12:55,628
I have so many presents,
it's weird.
323
00:12:55,695 --> 00:12:59,465
Yes!
Oh, for the baby?
324
00:12:59,533 --> 00:13:01,667
Just put them over there.
325
00:13:01,735 --> 00:13:03,869
- What's his name?
- Jack.
326
00:13:03,937 --> 00:13:06,906
Oh, that's good.
327
00:13:06,973 --> 00:13:09,575
Welcome to the team,
little guy.
328
00:13:14,781 --> 00:13:16,682
Take this down to maintenance.
329
00:13:16,750 --> 00:13:18,150
I know just where to take it,
Ethel,
330
00:13:18,185 --> 00:13:20,286
and I know just the person
who should accompany me.
331
00:13:20,354 --> 00:13:21,721
I'm a little busy right now.
332
00:13:21,788 --> 00:13:23,155
Not you, Kyle.
333
00:13:23,223 --> 00:13:25,024
How many times
did you and I
334
00:13:25,092 --> 00:13:27,893
deliver a form to maintenance
just like this?
335
00:13:27,961 --> 00:13:30,129
Oh, so many great conversations,
336
00:13:30,197 --> 00:13:32,398
bonding and mentoring moments.
337
00:13:32,466 --> 00:13:36,903
It seems only right that we make
this journey one final time.
338
00:13:37,571 --> 00:13:38,972
- What was that, boo-boo?
- Nothing.
339
00:13:39,039 --> 00:13:40,640
Oh!
340
00:13:40,708 --> 00:13:44,077
Tommy-T and Sexy Lexy Knope.
341
00:13:44,144 --> 00:13:46,346
Ooh, what are
you two bad larrys up to?
342
00:13:46,413 --> 00:13:48,181
Well, this is our last day
in Pawnee,
343
00:13:48,248 --> 00:13:50,350
and we have one last problem
to fix.
344
00:13:50,417 --> 00:13:51,951
Hold up.
You're leaving?
345
00:13:52,019 --> 00:13:53,086
For truth?
346
00:13:53,153 --> 00:13:55,822
I am gonna miss you so much.
347
00:13:55,889 --> 00:13:57,457
What's going on?
You're not injured?
348
00:13:57,524 --> 00:13:59,125
Uh, yeah, I'm injured.
349
00:13:59,193 --> 00:14:00,293
I got a terminal case of
350
00:14:00,361 --> 00:14:02,829
"Get me to the front of the line
at Six Flags"!
351
00:14:02,896 --> 00:14:04,931
Shaaa-boosh!
352
00:14:04,999 --> 00:14:07,400
It's a winter wonderland.
353
00:14:07,468 --> 00:14:10,303
I'm gonna be so sad
to see you go.
354
00:14:10,371 --> 00:14:13,573
Will you do me
one final kindness?
355
00:14:13,641 --> 00:14:17,243
Will you pretend to be my wife
for an insurance scam,
356
00:14:17,311 --> 00:14:20,213
but then we
fall in love for real?
357
00:14:20,281 --> 00:14:21,921
Also, can I have a pair
of your gym socks?
358
00:14:21,949 --> 00:14:23,429
No, wait,
it's not for anything weird.
359
00:14:23,484 --> 00:14:25,085
It's just a fetish I have.
360
00:14:25,152 --> 00:14:26,753
- Jean-Ralphio...
- Yeah.
361
00:14:26,821 --> 00:14:30,123
Although I truly hope
that I never see you again,
362
00:14:30,191 --> 00:14:35,361
I do wish you
a long and happy life.
363
00:14:35,429 --> 00:14:39,199
Today, we say good-bye
to Jean-Ralphio Saperstein.
364
00:14:39,266 --> 00:14:41,935
As per his last will
and testament,
365
00:14:42,002 --> 00:14:44,337
we will now listen
to his favorite song,
366
00:14:44,405 --> 00:14:48,241
Bend Over by Lil Jon,
featuring Tyga.
367
00:14:48,309 --> 00:14:50,944
♪ Bend ova, make your knees
touch your elbows ♪
368
00:14:51,011 --> 00:14:53,046
♪
369
00:14:53,114 --> 00:14:55,582
♪ Bend ova, make your knees
touch your elbows ♪
370
00:14:55,649 --> 00:14:58,651
♪
371
00:14:58,719 --> 00:14:59,853
Ooh, okay.
372
00:14:59,920 --> 00:15:01,121
Okay, they bought it.
They bought it.
373
00:15:01,188 --> 00:15:02,455
- Do you have the insurance money?
- No doubt.
374
00:15:02,523 --> 00:15:03,923
No doubt.
Let's hit it, bro.
375
00:15:03,991 --> 00:15:06,259
Time to start
a casino in...
376
00:15:06,327 --> 00:15:09,696
♪ Tajikistan
♪ Aaaaan
377
00:15:09,764 --> 00:15:11,431
♪ Tajikistan
378
00:15:11,499 --> 00:15:13,032
♪ Talking 'bout Tajiki...
379
00:15:13,100 --> 00:15:14,434
Stan!
380
00:15:14,502 --> 00:15:15,668
Jean-Ralphio?
381
00:15:15,736 --> 00:15:18,271
- Go! Tajikistan is off!
- Go, go, go, go!
382
00:15:18,339 --> 00:15:21,241
Tajikistan is off!
Tajikistan is off!
383
00:15:21,308 --> 00:15:24,878
So... Tom and I
have a swing to fix.
384
00:15:24,945 --> 00:15:27,247
Let's go.
385
00:15:27,314 --> 00:15:31,551
Leslie,
I've always loved you.
386
00:15:31,619 --> 00:15:33,620
I know.
387
00:15:38,559 --> 00:15:39,593
Oh, man!
388
00:15:39,661 --> 00:15:41,541
I forgot that maintenance
was closed on Fridays.
389
00:15:41,863 --> 00:15:43,063
What would
our last ride be
390
00:15:43,130 --> 00:15:45,365
without one more
bureaucratic snafu?
391
00:15:45,433 --> 00:15:48,235
Don't worry, boo-boo, Tommy will
solve this problem no sweat.
392
00:15:48,302 --> 00:15:51,338
Can I just say, Tom,
you have accomplished so much.
393
00:15:51,405 --> 00:15:54,140
You have come so far.
Now you're so successful.
394
00:15:54,208 --> 00:15:55,809
- Don't forget well-dressed.
- Yes.
395
00:15:55,877 --> 00:15:56,977
And well-dressed.
396
00:15:57,044 --> 00:15:59,546
I am so very proud of you.
397
00:15:59,614 --> 00:16:01,181
Thanks, Leslie.
398
00:16:01,249 --> 00:16:02,816
I'm proud of me too.
399
00:16:02,884 --> 00:16:04,117
Nice crooning, buddy.
400
00:16:04,185 --> 00:16:06,753
Uh, the gentleman
by the bar there
401
00:16:06,821 --> 00:16:08,255
sent you over
this glass of wine...
402
00:16:08,322 --> 00:16:11,493
and his business card.
403
00:16:13,060 --> 00:16:16,296
Okay, so as you all know,
Tom's Bistro
404
00:16:16,364 --> 00:16:18,932
has been presented with
a huge expansion opportunity.
405
00:16:19,000 --> 00:16:20,333
I don't want to make a decision
until I hear
406
00:16:20,401 --> 00:16:22,002
from my senior advisory board.
407
00:16:22,069 --> 00:16:23,737
So is this a good idea?
408
00:16:23,804 --> 00:16:26,473
- Accounting Nerd?
- I'm a congressman, Tom.
409
00:16:26,541 --> 00:16:27,908
Can you at least call me "Ben"?
410
00:16:27,975 --> 00:16:29,376
No can do, Accounting Nerd.
411
00:16:29,444 --> 00:16:30,978
We all knew you
before you were a big shot.
412
00:16:31,045 --> 00:16:32,512
Let's keep the whining
to a minimum.
413
00:16:32,580 --> 00:16:34,681
Well, there are always
gonna be risks
414
00:16:34,749 --> 00:16:37,484
when you open new restaurants,
but you've done your homework.
415
00:16:37,552 --> 00:16:39,320
All the numbers line up.
416
00:16:39,387 --> 00:16:40,788
Side note:
417
00:16:40,855 --> 00:16:44,858
I would again strongly recommend
adding calzones to the menu.
418
00:16:44,926 --> 00:16:47,261
Ugh. The worst.
Ron?
419
00:16:47,329 --> 00:16:49,463
It's a bold,
capitalistic gambit, son,
420
00:16:49,531 --> 00:16:51,366
but nothing ventured,
nothing gained.
421
00:16:51,933 --> 00:16:53,200
Regal Meagle?
422
00:16:53,268 --> 00:16:54,702
Real estate is pretty cheap
right now.
423
00:16:55,070 --> 00:16:57,304
If you're gonna do it,
this is a good time.
424
00:16:57,372 --> 00:16:59,273
Okay, I'm doing it.
425
00:16:59,341 --> 00:17:00,574
Over the next five years,
426
00:17:00,642 --> 00:17:03,744
there's gonna be
20 Tom's Bistros across America.
427
00:17:03,812 --> 00:17:06,580
Look out, world,
Tommy's about to blow up.
428
00:17:07,783 --> 00:17:09,183
And blow up he did,
429
00:17:09,217 --> 00:17:10,951
but not in the good way.
430
00:17:11,019 --> 00:17:12,720
He lost everything.
431
00:17:12,788 --> 00:17:16,624
Today, Tom Haverford
is broke, destitute,
432
00:17:16,692 --> 00:17:19,093
and worst of all, swaggerless.
433
00:17:19,161 --> 00:17:20,861
Tommy,
you got to stop watching this.
434
00:17:20,929 --> 00:17:22,697
I can't tear myself away.
435
00:17:22,764 --> 00:17:24,031
It's a whole documentary
about my failures.
436
00:17:24,099 --> 00:17:26,200
That you made.
437
00:17:26,268 --> 00:17:27,769
I had to.
438
00:17:27,836 --> 00:17:30,638
I have to remember every tiny,
awful aspect of this.
439
00:17:30,706 --> 00:17:32,106
I lost everything, Lucy--
440
00:17:32,174 --> 00:17:33,808
The franchises,
most of my money.
441
00:17:33,876 --> 00:17:35,743
I had to sell
my pocket square collection.
442
00:17:35,811 --> 00:17:37,912
What are people's eyes
gonna be drawn to?
443
00:17:37,980 --> 00:17:39,747
Look, you had a tough break.
444
00:17:39,815 --> 00:17:42,583
The stock market tanked,
credit dried up.
445
00:17:42,651 --> 00:17:43,584
Who could have predicted
that the country
446
00:17:43,652 --> 00:17:44,652
would run out of beef?
447
00:17:44,720 --> 00:17:46,454
You just got to move on.
448
00:17:46,522 --> 00:17:47,602
That's the problem, though.
449
00:17:47,656 --> 00:17:48,856
I've gone bust in the past,
450
00:17:48,924 --> 00:17:50,558
but it was because
I did something reckless.
451
00:17:50,626 --> 00:17:52,227
This time
I was smart and careful,
452
00:17:52,294 --> 00:17:53,361
and I still went broke.
453
00:17:53,429 --> 00:17:55,130
What do I do now?
454
00:17:55,197 --> 00:17:56,631
Well,
you and I are gonna be fine,
455
00:17:56,699 --> 00:17:59,367
and you'll come up
with a new idea.
456
00:17:59,435 --> 00:18:02,303
You always do.
457
00:18:02,371 --> 00:18:04,639
I once started
an entertainment company.
458
00:18:04,707 --> 00:18:06,841
It failed in four months.
459
00:18:06,909 --> 00:18:08,877
I opened
a clothing rental store.
460
00:18:08,944 --> 00:18:11,613
I built a restaurant empire.
461
00:18:11,681 --> 00:18:13,181
They all failed,
462
00:18:13,249 --> 00:18:17,185
but the story of America isn't
about second or third chances.
463
00:18:17,253 --> 00:18:23,191
It's about 4th, 5th,
6th, 20th, 50th chances.
464
00:18:23,259 --> 00:18:25,727
That's how long it took me
to get where I am today:
465
00:18:25,795 --> 00:18:27,729
Best-selling author of...
466
00:18:27,797 --> 00:18:30,999
Failure:
An American Success Story.
467
00:18:38,741 --> 00:18:40,175
As you know
if you've read the book,
468
00:18:40,243 --> 00:18:44,379
I've outlined seven different
types of successful people.
469
00:18:44,447 --> 00:18:50,085
You can be an Andy,
an April,
470
00:18:50,153 --> 00:18:53,755
a Ben, a Leslie,
471
00:18:53,823 --> 00:18:57,893
a Ron, a Donna,
472
00:18:57,961 --> 00:19:00,729
or my personal favorite, a Tom.
473
00:19:00,797 --> 00:19:03,765
But what do we definitely
not want to be?
474
00:19:03,833 --> 00:19:05,267
A Garry!
475
00:19:05,335 --> 00:19:07,669
That's right.
Do not be a Garry.
476
00:19:07,737 --> 00:19:10,973
Oh, he's talking about me!
477
00:19:11,341 --> 00:19:12,841
Hey.
478
00:19:12,909 --> 00:19:15,177
Hey, thanks so much
for coming, guys.
479
00:19:15,245 --> 00:19:16,245
Are you kidding?
480
00:19:16,313 --> 00:19:17,813
Tom, this is incredible.
481
00:19:17,881 --> 00:19:20,215
A best-selling book,
a 40-city tour?
482
00:19:20,283 --> 00:19:21,650
Well, I couldn't have
done it without you.
483
00:19:21,718 --> 00:19:23,419
Well, the book's
called Failure.
484
00:19:23,486 --> 00:19:25,254
- I don't know how to take that.
- I'm serious.
485
00:19:25,322 --> 00:19:27,256
You guys
have always supported me.
486
00:19:27,324 --> 00:19:29,491
Here, I inscribed you a copy.
487
00:19:29,559 --> 00:19:31,026
Oh.
488
00:19:31,094 --> 00:19:33,362
"When I think of success,
I think of you.
489
00:19:33,430 --> 00:19:35,397
"You are a true inspiration
to me.
490
00:19:35,465 --> 00:19:37,900
I love you,
Tom Haverford."
491
00:19:37,967 --> 00:19:40,869
Oh, sorry, that's actually
for Kendrick Lamar.
492
00:19:40,937 --> 00:19:42,805
Here's yours.
493
00:19:42,872 --> 00:19:45,607
"Best wishes."
494
00:19:45,675 --> 00:19:47,176
And I mean every word of it.
495
00:19:51,214 --> 00:19:53,115
So how are we gonna
fix this swing?
496
00:19:53,183 --> 00:19:54,550
Hold a public forum,
497
00:19:54,618 --> 00:19:57,353
have a rally, smash that door,
and do some looting?
498
00:19:57,421 --> 00:19:59,622
Actually, I think
there's a simpler solution.
499
00:19:59,690 --> 00:20:02,760
We just need the help of
the most powerful man in Pawnee.
500
00:20:04,027 --> 00:20:06,929
Jim, how the heck are you?
Yeah, look.
501
00:20:06,997 --> 00:20:09,198
I hate to bother you, but I'm
here with my two best friends,
502
00:20:09,266 --> 00:20:10,900
Leslie Knope
and Tom Haverford...
503
00:20:10,968 --> 00:20:12,535
Shh!
504
00:20:12,602 --> 00:20:14,370
And we need the first floor
maintenance room open.
505
00:20:14,438 --> 00:20:17,206
Mm. Okay, great, and best
to Louise and the girls.
506
00:20:17,274 --> 00:20:18,775
Okay, bye-bye.
507
00:20:18,842 --> 00:20:20,977
- You guys are all set.
- Thank you, Mayor Gergich.
508
00:20:21,045 --> 00:20:22,378
You really saved our butts.
509
00:20:22,446 --> 00:20:24,247
I am so happy
that you get to be mayor.
510
00:20:24,314 --> 00:20:25,448
Are you enjoying yourself?
511
00:20:25,516 --> 00:20:26,616
Oh, are you kidding me?
512
00:20:26,684 --> 00:20:28,851
Leslie, I know
that this is purely ceremonial,
513
00:20:28,919 --> 00:20:30,639
and it'll be over
in just a couple of weeks,
514
00:20:30,654 --> 00:20:32,488
but I just don't know
how my life
515
00:20:32,556 --> 00:20:33,856
could get any better than this.
516
00:20:33,924 --> 00:20:36,559
Oh!
517
00:20:36,627 --> 00:20:39,562
In a turn of events
both shocking and unexpected,
518
00:20:39,630 --> 00:20:43,199
interim mayor Garry Gergich
was officially elected today,
519
00:20:43,267 --> 00:20:45,535
thanks to a massive
write-in campaign.
520
00:20:45,603 --> 00:20:47,504
Mayor Gergich,
what are your plans
521
00:20:47,571 --> 00:20:48,938
for your first actual term?
522
00:20:49,006 --> 00:20:50,206
Oh, jeez, you know what?
523
00:20:50,274 --> 00:20:51,608
I have no idea, Perd.
524
00:20:51,675 --> 00:20:53,543
I mean, this is so crazy.
525
00:20:53,611 --> 00:20:54,911
I just hope I do a good job,
526
00:20:54,979 --> 00:20:57,313
and I promise
I'm gonna try my best.
527
00:20:57,381 --> 00:21:00,750
And faithfully serve the people
of Pawnee, Indiana.
528
00:21:00,818 --> 00:21:05,021
As president of City Council,
I, Councilwoman Brandi Maxxxx,
529
00:21:05,089 --> 00:21:09,359
star of more than 11,000 adult
films in the last two years,
530
00:21:09,427 --> 00:21:13,963
officially declare Garry Gergich
Mayor of Pawnee, Indiana,
531
00:21:14,031 --> 00:21:15,165
for the fourth time.
532
00:21:15,232 --> 00:21:17,233
Thank you, Pawnee!
533
00:21:17,301 --> 00:21:18,601
Okay, great.
534
00:21:18,669 --> 00:21:20,370
Garry Gergich,
you are now mayor,
535
00:21:20,438 --> 00:21:23,973
again, for the tenth time,
proving conclusively
536
00:21:24,041 --> 00:21:26,342
that in these corporate states
of America,
537
00:21:26,410 --> 00:21:29,512
it's the entrenched powers
who hold all the cards.
538
00:21:29,580 --> 00:21:31,548
Thank you,
Councilman Morris.
539
00:21:31,615 --> 00:21:33,616
Thank you, Pawnee!
540
00:21:33,684 --> 00:21:37,954
Happy birthday,
my sweet, sweet husband.
541
00:21:38,022 --> 00:21:40,457
We all love you so much.
542
00:21:40,525 --> 00:21:43,593
I have had the perfect life.
543
00:21:43,661 --> 00:21:45,929
I have had
the perfect marriage...
544
00:21:45,997 --> 00:21:48,365
- Oh!
- The perfect children,
545
00:21:48,432 --> 00:21:52,836
and the perfect grandchildren
and great-grandchildren!
546
00:21:52,904 --> 00:21:56,573
And I just want you to know
how much I love you.
547
00:21:56,641 --> 00:21:59,776
Okay, come on, everybody,
say, "Gergich!"
548
00:21:59,844 --> 00:22:03,680
Gergich!
549
00:22:03,748 --> 00:22:07,584
Mayor Garry Gergich
died peacefully in his sleep
550
00:22:07,652 --> 00:22:09,586
on his 100th birthday,
551
00:22:09,654 --> 00:22:13,523
holding the hand
of his beloved wife, Gayle.
552
00:22:13,591 --> 00:22:16,793
Man, Gayle looks amazing.
553
00:22:16,861 --> 00:22:18,195
Yeah, yeah.
I know.
554
00:22:18,262 --> 00:22:19,496
He will now be given
555
00:22:19,564 --> 00:22:23,433
the Indiana Notary Society's
highest honor,
556
00:22:23,501 --> 00:22:25,168
the 21-Stamp Salute.
557
00:22:32,710 --> 00:22:36,146
Oh, rest in peace, friend.
558
00:22:36,214 --> 00:22:39,449
They spelled his name wrong
on the tombstone.
559
00:22:41,185 --> 00:22:45,088
- Eh, close enough.
- Eh.
560
00:22:45,156 --> 00:22:47,057
It's time to go.
561
00:22:49,983 --> 00:22:52,284
Okay.
How's this for a headline?
562
00:22:52,351 --> 00:22:55,487
"Still Swinging: Parks Gang
Reunites for One Last Bang."
563
00:22:55,555 --> 00:22:56,955
That's a little dirty.
564
00:22:57,023 --> 00:22:59,124
Well, it's a headline, Shauna.
Sex sells.
565
00:22:59,192 --> 00:23:00,425
Knope,
566
00:23:00,493 --> 00:23:03,495
make yourself useful and hand me
that crescent wrench.
567
00:23:03,563 --> 00:23:07,165
Oh,
not bad craftsmanship, Ron.
568
00:23:07,233 --> 00:23:09,135
It is perfect craftsmanship.
569
00:23:10,803 --> 00:23:13,873
I calculate the cost
of my labor at $38.
570
00:23:14,641 --> 00:23:17,409
I can send the bill to you?
571
00:23:17,477 --> 00:23:19,711
So you think you're
gonna stick around Pawnee?
572
00:23:19,779 --> 00:23:21,480
Oh, I imagine so.
573
00:23:21,548 --> 00:23:23,882
Not sure where
I would go, really.
574
00:23:23,950 --> 00:23:26,885
Well, we're gonna
come back here a lot.
575
00:23:26,953 --> 00:23:28,889
You know what they say.
576
00:23:30,256 --> 00:23:32,192
Don't be a stranger.
577
00:23:33,460 --> 00:23:35,661
Despite the recent
financial crisis,
578
00:23:35,729 --> 00:23:39,598
Very Good Building Company
will finish fiscal year 2022
579
00:23:39,666 --> 00:23:42,535
in excellent financial shape,
thanks in large part
580
00:23:42,602 --> 00:23:45,371
to the stewardship
of your chairman, Ron Swanson.
581
00:23:45,438 --> 00:23:48,207
Mr. Chairman, would you like
to say a few words?
582
00:23:52,045 --> 00:23:55,314
I resign as chairman,
effective immediately.
583
00:23:55,382 --> 00:23:58,284
Uh, would you
like to explain why?
584
00:23:58,351 --> 00:23:59,818
No.
585
00:23:59,886 --> 00:24:02,221
Should we discuss
your retirement package?
586
00:24:02,289 --> 00:24:04,456
Just give me whatever
the board thinks is fair.
587
00:24:04,524 --> 00:24:07,426
- Agreed.
- Best of luck.
588
00:24:07,494 --> 00:24:10,062
Don't get emotional, Vaughn.
You're embarrassing yourself.
589
00:24:12,666 --> 00:24:14,600
What just happened?
590
00:24:18,038 --> 00:24:20,239
Ron, your family is beautiful.
591
00:24:20,307 --> 00:24:22,175
They're a handsome bunch.
592
00:24:22,242 --> 00:24:25,678
Diane and I are especially proud
because Ivy was just accepted
593
00:24:25,746 --> 00:24:26,746
at Stanford University.
594
00:24:26,747 --> 00:24:27,914
Wow.
595
00:24:27,982 --> 00:24:29,215
Yeah, it's gonna cost
an arm and a leg.
596
00:24:29,283 --> 00:24:30,550
You take my advice?
597
00:24:30,617 --> 00:24:32,051
I did.
Thank you, again.
598
00:24:32,119 --> 00:24:33,453
I sold some of my gold
599
00:24:33,520 --> 00:24:36,523
and officially diversified
my portfolio.
600
00:24:36,590 --> 00:24:38,058
Congratulations.
601
00:24:38,125 --> 00:24:40,660
You now own 51%
of the Lagavulin Distillery.
602
00:24:40,728 --> 00:24:42,088
Pleasure doing business
with you.
603
00:24:42,096 --> 00:24:43,196
And with you.
604
00:24:43,264 --> 00:24:44,766
Sláinte.
605
00:24:46,534 --> 00:24:49,404
So, Ron,
what brings you here?
606
00:24:51,072 --> 00:24:53,907
I am at something
of a personal crossroads.
607
00:24:53,975 --> 00:24:56,510
Yes!
I love personal crossroads.
608
00:24:56,577 --> 00:25:00,514
I once made the mistake of not
talking to you at such a moment,
609
00:25:00,581 --> 00:25:03,617
and I do not intend
to repeat that error.
610
00:25:03,684 --> 00:25:05,085
Well, let's take a walk.
611
00:25:05,153 --> 00:25:07,922
There's a cute,
little park nearby.
612
00:25:08,990 --> 00:25:11,525
I suppose I had simply
613
00:25:11,592 --> 00:25:13,460
accomplished everything
I wanted to,
614
00:25:13,528 --> 00:25:16,563
and there seemed to be
little point in continuing.
615
00:25:16,631 --> 00:25:19,399
So what do you want to do now?
616
00:25:19,467 --> 00:25:21,134
Well, that's the problem.
617
00:25:21,202 --> 00:25:22,669
I'm not sure.
618
00:25:22,737 --> 00:25:24,638
My kids are growing up.
619
00:25:24,706 --> 00:25:27,541
My days in an office
feel like a waste.
620
00:25:27,609 --> 00:25:32,579
I would like to turn
my attention to something...
621
00:25:32,647 --> 00:25:35,649
that would make me feel useful,
622
00:25:35,717 --> 00:25:40,354
but for the life of me,
I cannot figure out what.
623
00:25:40,421 --> 00:25:44,024
And there are not many people--
624
00:25:44,092 --> 00:25:46,594
I mean, we were workplace
proximity acquaintances
625
00:25:46,661 --> 00:25:49,029
for many years,
and so I thought--
626
00:25:49,097 --> 00:25:50,164
I thought maybe...
627
00:25:50,232 --> 00:25:52,766
Say no more, you big softie.
628
00:25:52,834 --> 00:25:54,835
I'm gonna spend
every waking moment
629
00:25:54,903 --> 00:25:56,938
trying to figure this out
for you.
630
00:25:58,006 --> 00:25:58,939
You want to stay for dinner?
631
00:25:59,007 --> 00:26:00,474
- We're having steak.
- Mm?
632
00:26:00,542 --> 00:26:02,142
But we're also hosting
several members
633
00:26:02,210 --> 00:26:04,145
of the House Subcommittee
on Foreign Affairs.
634
00:26:04,212 --> 00:26:06,581
I'll take that steak to go,
please and thank you.
635
00:26:12,087 --> 00:26:15,857
Hey, there you are.
Thanks for meeting me here.
636
00:26:15,924 --> 00:26:16,924
Well, if you'd have
held them here
637
00:26:16,992 --> 00:26:18,126
instead of that conference room,
638
00:26:18,193 --> 00:26:19,927
I would have come
to more meetings.
639
00:26:19,995 --> 00:26:23,298
I got to tell you, Leslie,
establishing this national park
640
00:26:23,365 --> 00:26:27,068
right next to Pawnee
is quite an accomplishment.
641
00:26:27,136 --> 00:26:29,370
This is a fine piece of land
you saved.
642
00:26:29,438 --> 00:26:31,272
Thank you, Ron.
643
00:26:31,340 --> 00:26:33,608
You want to run it?
644
00:26:33,676 --> 00:26:36,144
The superintendent
of Bryce Canyon retired,
645
00:26:36,211 --> 00:26:38,146
and I convinced
the superintendent of this park
646
00:26:38,213 --> 00:26:40,281
to transfer,
shuffled a few things around.
647
00:26:40,349 --> 00:26:42,517
The point is someone needs
to take care of this place now.
648
00:26:42,584 --> 00:26:44,452
Thought it should be you.
649
00:26:44,520 --> 00:26:46,121
I...
650
00:26:47,189 --> 00:26:48,756
Well, first of all,
I would be working
651
00:26:48,824 --> 00:26:50,124
for the federal government.
652
00:26:50,192 --> 00:26:52,560
Your job would be
to walk around the land alone,
653
00:26:52,628 --> 00:26:54,529
you'd live in the same town
you've always lived in,
654
00:26:54,596 --> 00:26:55,897
you'd work outside,
you'd talk to bears.
655
00:26:55,964 --> 00:26:57,165
Next argument?
656
00:26:57,233 --> 00:26:59,501
There must be dozens of people
gunning for this job.
657
00:26:59,568 --> 00:27:01,870
I wouldn't want you
to ruffle any feathers.
658
00:27:01,937 --> 00:27:03,104
Am I even qualified?
659
00:27:03,172 --> 00:27:04,773
Well, a few people
might be annoyed,
660
00:27:04,840 --> 00:27:05,874
but they'll get over it.
661
00:27:05,941 --> 00:27:07,675
And as far
as your qualifications,
662
00:27:07,743 --> 00:27:09,145
you're Ron Swanson.
663
00:27:10,212 --> 00:27:12,215
Stop being a dummy and accept.
664
00:27:13,482 --> 00:27:15,550
- When do I start?
- Oh, today.
665
00:27:15,618 --> 00:27:16,818
I already accepted for you.
666
00:27:16,886 --> 00:27:19,254
I still remember
how to forge your signature.
667
00:27:19,321 --> 00:27:20,824
Let's go meet your staff.
668
00:27:23,092 --> 00:27:24,926
Pawnee National Park rangers,
669
00:27:24,994 --> 00:27:28,931
this is Ron Swanson, your new
superintendent and boss.
670
00:27:29,999 --> 00:27:34,803
Rangers, my name
is Ronald Ulysses Swanson.
671
00:27:34,871 --> 00:27:38,740
Your job and mine
is to walk this land
672
00:27:38,808 --> 00:27:40,976
and make sure no one harms it.
673
00:27:41,043 --> 00:27:43,845
If you show up on time,
speak honestly,
674
00:27:43,913 --> 00:27:45,547
and treat everyone
with fairness,
675
00:27:45,615 --> 00:27:48,283
we will get along just fine.
676
00:27:48,351 --> 00:27:49,818
Though hopefully not too fine,
677
00:27:49,886 --> 00:27:52,320
as I'm not looking
for any new friends.
678
00:27:52,388 --> 00:27:53,889
End of speech.
679
00:27:53,956 --> 00:27:55,357
Well said.
680
00:27:58,495 --> 00:28:01,163
Thank you, Leslie.
681
00:28:01,231 --> 00:28:03,432
You're welcome, Ron.
682
00:28:07,637 --> 00:28:09,538
Okay.
683
00:28:09,606 --> 00:28:11,240
Time to go to work.
684
00:28:13,910 --> 00:28:16,144
♪ Laugh with me, buddy
685
00:28:16,212 --> 00:28:19,681
♪ Jest with me, buddy
686
00:28:19,749 --> 00:28:24,586
♪ Don't let her get the best
of me, buddy ♪
687
00:28:24,654 --> 00:28:27,723
♪ Don't ever let me start
688
00:28:27,790 --> 00:28:30,092
♪ Feeling lonely
689
00:28:30,159 --> 00:28:32,261
♪
690
00:28:36,666 --> 00:28:38,901
Well, I have to make
a couple more adjustments.
691
00:28:43,106 --> 00:28:44,673
Babe,
I don't want to seem dramatic,
692
00:28:44,741 --> 00:28:46,608
but I've just reconsidered
every decision
693
00:28:46,676 --> 00:28:47,943
that we've made
over the last year,
694
00:28:48,011 --> 00:28:50,145
and I think we need
to stay in Pawnee forever.
695
00:28:50,213 --> 00:28:51,580
I know.
696
00:28:51,648 --> 00:28:52,814
But we have to pick up
the kids,
697
00:28:52,882 --> 00:28:53,982
and we have a flight to catch.
698
00:28:54,050 --> 00:28:55,517
But when is this group
of people
699
00:28:55,585 --> 00:28:57,686
ever going to be
all together again?
700
00:28:57,754 --> 00:28:59,288
That's all I want,
701
00:28:59,355 --> 00:29:01,990
all of these people in
the same place at the same time.
702
00:29:02,058 --> 00:29:03,959
It'll happen someday.
703
00:29:04,027 --> 00:29:05,627
What's gonna happen
between now and then?
704
00:29:05,695 --> 00:29:09,531
A lot,
and it's all gonna be great.
705
00:29:09,599 --> 00:29:11,466
- You promise?
- I promise.
706
00:29:18,341 --> 00:29:19,942
This is a nice house.
707
00:29:20,010 --> 00:29:22,044
You say that every time
we're here.
708
00:29:22,112 --> 00:29:23,245
I'm just trying
to distract you,
709
00:29:23,313 --> 00:29:25,314
so you don't have
a nervous breakdown.
710
00:29:25,382 --> 00:29:27,149
I think I am past that point.
711
00:29:27,217 --> 00:29:28,417
You don't have to worry
about me anymore.
712
00:29:28,485 --> 00:29:30,286
Hey, folks, welcome back.
713
00:29:30,353 --> 00:29:32,521
Great to have so many
good friends and colleagues.
714
00:29:32,589 --> 00:29:35,257
We're looking forward to a great
conversation and a good dinner.
715
00:29:35,325 --> 00:29:38,994
As usual, there's only
one rule: No shop talk.
716
00:29:39,062 --> 00:29:40,763
So if you want
to discuss politics,
717
00:29:40,830 --> 00:29:42,765
you're gonna have to wait
until after dinner.
718
00:29:42,832 --> 00:29:44,333
I'm looking at you, Leslie.
719
00:29:44,401 --> 00:29:47,536
Okay, well, as long as we get
to play charades later.
720
00:29:47,604 --> 00:29:49,471
Okay.
721
00:29:49,539 --> 00:29:52,708
Last time we played charades,
she spent 3 1/2 hours here.
722
00:29:52,776 --> 00:29:54,096
You're just mad
'cause you lost.
723
00:29:54,110 --> 00:29:55,844
Oh, come on.
724
00:30:01,522 --> 00:30:03,590
Damn!
That food was good.
725
00:30:03,658 --> 00:30:05,258
I've said it before,
and I'll say it again--
726
00:30:05,326 --> 00:30:08,028
Joe Biden knows his way
around a seafood risotto.
727
00:30:08,095 --> 00:30:09,863
You've said that before?
728
00:30:09,931 --> 00:30:13,066
Anyway, the point is, yes,
I do like working at Interior.
729
00:30:13,134 --> 00:30:15,635
I love it, but I'm always
looking for new challenges.
730
00:30:15,703 --> 00:30:16,970
Why do you ask?
731
00:30:17,038 --> 00:30:19,106
There's a rumor
the governor of Indiana
732
00:30:19,173 --> 00:30:22,075
isn't going to run again,
and my friends at the DNC
733
00:30:22,143 --> 00:30:25,312
are very interested in you
as a candidate.
734
00:30:25,380 --> 00:30:27,748
- For governor of Indiana?
- Mm-hmm.
735
00:30:27,815 --> 00:30:29,975
Someone's been reading
my kindergarten dream journal.
736
00:30:29,984 --> 00:30:31,285
So what do you think?
737
00:30:31,352 --> 00:30:32,819
I'll call you next week,
and we can talk about it?
738
00:30:32,887 --> 00:30:35,289
O-okay, great.
739
00:30:35,356 --> 00:30:37,090
Well, this is exciting.
740
00:30:37,158 --> 00:30:38,592
I'm gonna take this energy,
741
00:30:38,660 --> 00:30:40,594
and I'm gonna go crush Joe Biden
in charades.
742
00:30:41,162 --> 00:30:43,065
Dr. Jill, let's pick teams.
743
00:30:45,333 --> 00:30:46,934
Oh.
Move.
744
00:30:47,202 --> 00:30:49,269
Need the congressman.
This is time-sensitive.
745
00:30:49,337 --> 00:30:51,305
Hey, Jen,
I didn't know you were here.
746
00:30:51,373 --> 00:30:52,406
I'm everywhere.
747
00:30:52,474 --> 00:30:54,341
You want to be
governor of Indiana?
748
00:30:54,909 --> 00:30:55,809
What?
749
00:30:55,877 --> 00:30:57,311
Colquitt's not gonna
run again.
750
00:30:57,379 --> 00:30:59,079
It's a rumor for now,
but my gut says it's for real.
751
00:30:59,147 --> 00:31:00,547
You're the perfect candidate.
752
00:31:00,615 --> 00:31:02,716
Local hero,
state government experience,
753
00:31:02,784 --> 00:31:04,318
blah-blah-blah-
blah-blah-blah-blah.
754
00:31:04,386 --> 00:31:05,753
I mean,
the only potential problem
755
00:31:05,820 --> 00:31:08,355
is that devastatingly nerdy
"Cones of Dunshire" thing.
756
00:31:08,423 --> 00:31:10,257
Uh, that's a problem?
757
00:31:10,325 --> 00:31:11,592
I'm sorry,
758
00:31:11,659 --> 00:31:13,761
but it's the ninth-highest
selling multiplayer
759
00:31:13,828 --> 00:31:18,599
figurine-based strategy
fantasy sequel game in history.
760
00:31:18,666 --> 00:31:21,268
Please don't bail on me
because of what just happened.
761
00:31:23,905 --> 00:31:24,705
So...
762
00:31:24,773 --> 00:31:26,173
I had a pretty interesting
conversation
763
00:31:26,241 --> 00:31:27,521
with Janet from the DNC tonight.
764
00:31:27,576 --> 00:31:28,709
- Oh, yeah?
- Yeah.
765
00:31:28,777 --> 00:31:30,578
She said
that Governor Colquitt
766
00:31:30,645 --> 00:31:32,379
might be stepping down,
767
00:31:32,447 --> 00:31:35,816
and the DNC thinks
that I should run for governor.
768
00:31:35,884 --> 00:31:40,354
Oh, God.
That... kind of sucks.
769
00:31:40,422 --> 00:31:41,689
Really? Why?
770
00:31:41,757 --> 00:31:43,524
No. I mean, that's--
771
00:31:43,592 --> 00:31:44,759
That's amazing.
772
00:31:44,827 --> 00:31:49,063
It's just, Jen Barkley kind of
approached me about running.
773
00:31:49,131 --> 00:31:51,433
Oh!
Oh.
774
00:31:52,501 --> 00:31:55,336
Well, I mean, obviously...
775
00:31:57,239 --> 00:31:58,606
Right.
Yeah, no, no.
776
00:31:58,674 --> 00:31:59,707
I mean, obviously...
777
00:31:59,775 --> 00:32:01,576
Yeah, I mean, obviously...
778
00:32:04,947 --> 00:32:07,182
Okay, pros of you
running for governor:
779
00:32:07,249 --> 00:32:09,083
You would be a great governor,
780
00:32:09,151 --> 00:32:10,718
we could make Pawnee
our home base,
781
00:32:10,786 --> 00:32:12,320
kids could go to school
in Pawnee,
782
00:32:12,388 --> 00:32:14,589
and it would be
a huge career move for you.
783
00:32:14,657 --> 00:32:17,825
The pros of me running
for governor are the same thing.
784
00:32:17,893 --> 00:32:19,327
- It's the same list.
- Right.
785
00:32:19,395 --> 00:32:21,329
The only con of you running
would be
786
00:32:21,397 --> 00:32:23,565
that I don't get to run
and vice versa.
787
00:32:25,634 --> 00:32:27,335
Good.
So we've solved it.
788
00:32:27,403 --> 00:32:29,237
Ugh.
Look.
789
00:32:29,305 --> 00:32:30,745
We're going back
to Pawnee in a week.
790
00:32:30,773 --> 00:32:32,641
Why don't we just
talk about it after that?
791
00:32:32,708 --> 00:32:34,009
Good idea.
792
00:32:34,076 --> 00:32:35,810
Hey, maybe we can drop by
the old stomping ground,
793
00:32:35,878 --> 00:32:37,979
see how the Parks Department
has changed.
794
00:32:38,047 --> 00:32:39,047
I love it.
795
00:32:39,115 --> 00:32:40,749
Okay, are you ready?
796
00:32:40,816 --> 00:32:43,018
No, but we don't have
a choice, do we?
797
00:32:44,153 --> 00:32:46,021
Kids, dinner!
798
00:32:46,088 --> 00:32:48,288
Hey, I'm gonna eat in my room
because I have to study.
799
00:32:48,324 --> 00:32:49,324
Can we go to Bobby's house
to watch the game?
800
00:32:49,392 --> 00:32:50,625
Hey, dude, stop.
801
00:32:50,693 --> 00:32:51,860
- Did you finish your homework?
- Yes, all of it.
802
00:32:51,928 --> 00:32:53,161
- Okay, don't forget to...
- That's mine.
803
00:32:53,229 --> 00:32:54,362
- We'll be back by 8:00.
- Bye, Dad. Bye, Mom.
804
00:32:54,430 --> 00:32:55,830
- Bye.
- Okay, get your ice skates!
805
00:32:55,898 --> 00:32:56,998
- You have a lesson tomorrow!
- Bye, Mom.
806
00:32:57,066 --> 00:32:58,300
- Bye, Dad.
- Just-okay.
807
00:32:58,367 --> 00:32:59,970
Bye.
808
00:33:02,238 --> 00:33:04,806
- Want some broccoli?
- Ugh, no.
809
00:33:05,975 --> 00:33:07,409
You know, now that I'm here,
810
00:33:07,477 --> 00:33:10,278
it's giving me an idea
about this governor thing.
811
00:33:10,346 --> 00:33:12,447
Maybe we need fresh eyes,
you know,
812
00:33:12,515 --> 00:33:13,915
other people to weigh in.
813
00:33:13,983 --> 00:33:18,820
We should talk to Ron or Tom
or April or Donna or Andy even.
814
00:33:18,888 --> 00:33:20,956
- Sometimes he can be wise.
- Oh, good idea.
815
00:33:21,024 --> 00:33:22,624
Let's call them.
816
00:33:22,692 --> 00:33:24,259
Or you know what else
we could do?
817
00:33:24,327 --> 00:33:25,894
Just talk to them in person.
818
00:33:25,962 --> 00:33:28,764
Hey!
819
00:33:28,831 --> 00:33:31,466
Surprise!
820
00:33:31,534 --> 00:33:33,035
Oh, wow.
821
00:33:33,102 --> 00:33:34,222
It's what you wanted, right,
822
00:33:34,237 --> 00:33:36,705
everyone in the same room
at same time?
823
00:33:36,773 --> 00:33:39,041
I can't believe you.
824
00:33:39,108 --> 00:33:42,544
We're all here together
in the same room...
825
00:33:42,612 --> 00:33:45,647
in this room.
826
00:33:45,715 --> 00:33:48,283
I don't think
I could be happier right now.
827
00:33:48,351 --> 00:33:49,351
Want to bet?
828
00:33:49,419 --> 00:33:51,620
- Hi.
- Oh, Ann's here!
829
00:33:51,688 --> 00:33:53,488
Ann.
Ann's here!
830
00:33:53,556 --> 00:33:54,890
- Hi!
- Oh!
831
00:33:54,957 --> 00:33:56,091
- Hey.
- Hey, buddy.
832
00:33:56,159 --> 00:33:57,793
- How you doing?
- Oh, good.
833
00:33:57,860 --> 00:33:59,728
- You guys, Ann's here.
- Aww.
834
00:33:59,796 --> 00:34:01,196
- Should we move away from here?
- Yeah, yeah.
835
00:34:01,264 --> 00:34:03,865
- This could go on for some time.
- Ohh!
836
00:34:08,257 --> 00:34:09,593
Your hair looks amazing,
by the way.
837
00:34:09,761 --> 00:34:11,194
You look like
a cartoon princess.
838
00:34:11,262 --> 00:34:13,430
Oh, thank you! That's from the pills
I was telling you about.
839
00:34:13,498 --> 00:34:14,665
I took some of those,
840
00:34:14,732 --> 00:34:15,899
but I don't know,
they didn't do anything,
841
00:34:15,967 --> 00:34:17,301
and they kind of upset
my stomach.
842
00:34:17,368 --> 00:34:18,735
No, no, no.
You're supposed to crack them
843
00:34:18,803 --> 00:34:20,838
and leave them on your hair
overnight, not eat them.
844
00:34:20,905 --> 00:34:22,373
Oh, no.
845
00:34:22,440 --> 00:34:25,009
Well, it's confusing
'cause they're delicious.
846
00:34:25,076 --> 00:34:27,278
Because my first book
was such a smash,
847
00:34:27,345 --> 00:34:29,385
I had to come up with
a new angle for the follow-up.
848
00:34:29,447 --> 00:34:32,416
Then it hit me...
Failure 2.0: Failing to Fail.
849
00:34:32,484 --> 00:34:34,151
- Love it.
- How's everything?
850
00:34:34,219 --> 00:34:36,259
You properly treating yourself
out there in Seattle?
851
00:34:36,321 --> 00:34:37,388
In a manner of speaking.
852
00:34:37,456 --> 00:34:39,223
Joe and I spend most of our time
on the foundation.
853
00:34:40,411 --> 00:34:41,983
I can't believe
you went nonprofit.
854
00:34:42,027 --> 00:34:42,994
I mean, I love you.
855
00:34:43,062 --> 00:34:44,395
You're one of my best friends,
856
00:34:44,463 --> 00:34:46,564
but you have betrayed me
and everything we stand for.
857
00:34:46,632 --> 00:34:48,366
- You've changed.
- Maybe you're right.
858
00:34:48,434 --> 00:34:50,468
By the way, what time is it?
859
00:34:50,536 --> 00:34:53,004
Oh, it looks like
it's half past spla-Dow!
860
00:34:53,072 --> 00:34:54,305
What?
861
00:34:54,373 --> 00:34:55,606
I take it all back.
862
00:34:55,674 --> 00:34:56,874
That's a lot of diamonds.
863
00:34:56,942 --> 00:34:58,662
Give me, give me, give me,
give me, give me!
864
00:34:58,711 --> 00:35:01,412
Hey, Oliver.
Hey, Leslie.
865
00:35:01,480 --> 00:35:03,181
- Hello, Ann.
- Hi, April.
866
00:35:03,248 --> 00:35:05,383
Your kids are,
like, surprisingly awesome.
867
00:35:05,451 --> 00:35:06,451
Thank you.
868
00:35:06,452 --> 00:35:07,685
Did you use an egg donor
869
00:35:07,753 --> 00:35:10,121
or give Chris a hall pass
for a night?
870
00:35:10,189 --> 00:35:12,690
Once again,
they are my biological children.
871
00:35:12,758 --> 00:35:14,826
Once again,
I don't believe you.
872
00:35:14,894 --> 00:35:18,463
Ann, you rainbow-infused
space unicorn.
873
00:35:18,531 --> 00:35:22,033
Ann, you beautiful,
sassy mannequin come to life.
874
00:35:22,101 --> 00:35:24,436
Ann, you opalescent tree shark.
875
00:35:24,504 --> 00:35:26,905
Leslie, you are the master
of the metaphor.
876
00:35:26,973 --> 00:35:28,306
Oh.
877
00:35:28,374 --> 00:35:30,742
I recently compared her
to a nutrient-rich chia seed.
878
00:35:30,810 --> 00:35:31,977
What's that thing
on your wrist?
879
00:35:32,044 --> 00:35:33,545
Oh!
880
00:35:36,015 --> 00:35:38,183
You are extremely healthy.
881
00:35:38,251 --> 00:35:40,952
I do that literally
50 times a day.
882
00:35:41,020 --> 00:35:44,189
Aren't you afraid that thing
might give you cancer?
883
00:35:44,257 --> 00:35:45,824
Well, I am now.
884
00:35:45,892 --> 00:35:47,826
Well, there he is.
885
00:35:47,894 --> 00:35:50,662
Chip Traeger,
you old son of a gun.
886
00:35:50,730 --> 00:35:52,197
Andy, it's Chris.
887
00:35:52,265 --> 00:35:54,366
Is it?
888
00:35:54,433 --> 00:35:55,801
Ha! Huh.
889
00:35:55,869 --> 00:35:59,004
Hello, Jack.
Ron Swanson.
890
00:35:59,072 --> 00:36:00,339
Strong handshake.
891
00:36:00,406 --> 00:36:02,207
- Well done, you two.
- Thank you.
892
00:36:02,275 --> 00:36:03,942
So are you
gonna have another one?
893
00:36:04,010 --> 00:36:06,044
Um...
894
00:36:07,680 --> 00:36:09,949
- Shh.
- Shh.
895
00:36:11,117 --> 00:36:13,685
'Cause--
'cause he's sleeping?
896
00:36:13,753 --> 00:36:15,220
How can you tell?
897
00:36:15,288 --> 00:36:16,722
Oh,
it's a common misconception
898
00:36:16,789 --> 00:36:18,557
that the Oculus
holds all of the power.
899
00:36:18,625 --> 00:36:19,892
It's actually the Lamplighter.
900
00:36:19,959 --> 00:36:21,693
Ann! Oh, my God!
It's happening.
901
00:36:21,761 --> 00:36:24,390
It's totally happening.
Our kids are falling in love.
902
00:36:24,397 --> 00:36:25,798
This is good.
Okay, remember.
903
00:36:25,865 --> 00:36:28,100
If this is ever gonna work, we
have to pretend to disapprove.
904
00:36:28,168 --> 00:36:30,069
Yeah, right, good call.
905
00:36:30,136 --> 00:36:31,537
Hey!
906
00:36:31,605 --> 00:36:32,905
- Leslie, no.
- Oh.
907
00:36:32,973 --> 00:36:35,608
Who cares?
908
00:36:35,675 --> 00:36:38,444
Ann Arbor, Michigan,
is literally the greatest city
909
00:36:38,511 --> 00:36:40,346
that I have ever lived in,
910
00:36:40,413 --> 00:36:42,781
but Pawnee is better,
so we're moving back.
911
00:36:42,849 --> 00:36:44,016
- That's great.
- Yeah.
912
00:36:44,084 --> 00:36:46,085
I'm gonna run admissions
at Indiana.
913
00:36:46,152 --> 00:36:47,820
I'm trading Wolverines
for Hoosiers.
914
00:36:47,887 --> 00:36:50,323
Well, you're getting
the better end of that deal.
915
00:36:50,991 --> 00:36:52,391
Tom!
916
00:36:52,459 --> 00:36:55,461
I took the quiz in your book
about what kind of person I am.
917
00:36:55,529 --> 00:36:56,662
I'm a "Ron."
918
00:36:56,730 --> 00:36:58,431
Ha!
I'm usually a "Tom,"
919
00:36:58,498 --> 00:37:00,266
but sometimes I'm a "Donna."
920
00:37:00,334 --> 00:37:02,335
Last time I took it,
I was a "Tom."
921
00:37:02,402 --> 00:37:05,171
What?
No.
922
00:37:05,238 --> 00:37:06,372
No, no, no!
923
00:37:06,440 --> 00:37:07,907
Take it again!
924
00:37:07,974 --> 00:37:10,176
I got to go recalibrate
the quiz.
925
00:37:14,763 --> 00:37:18,100
♪ Things I really want to do
926
00:37:19,068 --> 00:37:20,735
So did anyone
have any insights
927
00:37:20,803 --> 00:37:22,404
on our "running for governor"
situation?
928
00:37:22,672 --> 00:37:24,392
I've been so busy
catching up with everyone,
929
00:37:24,440 --> 00:37:25,800
I haven't had a chance
to ask them.
930
00:37:25,808 --> 00:37:27,309
- Yeah, me neither.
- Okay, here's what I think.
931
00:37:27,376 --> 00:37:29,010
I hate
when we're on opposite sides.
932
00:37:29,078 --> 00:37:30,745
It stinks.
933
00:37:30,813 --> 00:37:33,081
Plus, if one of us runs,
it doesn't mean we're gonna win.
934
00:37:33,149 --> 00:37:35,684
Right, and it's not like
this is the only career option
935
00:37:35,751 --> 00:37:36,885
for either of us.
936
00:37:36,952 --> 00:37:39,120
So all that matters
is that we are good.
937
00:37:39,188 --> 00:37:42,057
Right,
which is why I have an idea.
938
00:37:42,124 --> 00:37:44,592
I think we should flip a coin.
I mean it.
939
00:37:44,660 --> 00:37:47,896
Let's literally flip a coin,
because whoever runs
940
00:37:47,963 --> 00:37:50,665
is gonna do a great job,
and whoever doesn't run
941
00:37:50,733 --> 00:37:53,268
is gonna be right alongside
the other one,
942
00:37:53,336 --> 00:37:56,004
offering advice and support
and whatever they need.
943
00:37:56,072 --> 00:37:57,238
So it doesn't matter.
944
00:37:57,306 --> 00:37:58,707
So let's flip a coin.
945
00:37:58,774 --> 00:38:00,675
Okay, you, Leslie Knope,
946
00:38:00,743 --> 00:38:05,080
the queen of planning and
binders and pro-and-con lists,
947
00:38:05,147 --> 00:38:08,416
you want to leave this
to chance?
948
00:38:08,484 --> 00:38:14,122
Yes, because whatever's next,
you and I are in it together.
949
00:38:14,190 --> 00:38:16,591
So let's go tell everybody,
and they can participate,
950
00:38:16,659 --> 00:38:18,426
and they can sign the coin,
and then, you know, the coin
951
00:38:18,494 --> 00:38:21,198
will eventually make its way
into the Smithsonian.
952
00:38:23,116 --> 00:38:25,050
Okay, everybody, gather around.
953
00:38:25,118 --> 00:38:27,819
First of all, I just have to say
that all of you in the same room
954
00:38:27,887 --> 00:38:29,488
at the same time
with your children here,
955
00:38:29,555 --> 00:38:30,889
it's like
it's the greatest thing
956
00:38:30,957 --> 00:38:32,797
that's ever happened
in the history of America.
957
00:38:32,859 --> 00:38:35,294
And secondly,
Ben and I have an announcement.
958
00:38:35,361 --> 00:38:37,663
Leslie's running
for governor of Indiana.
959
00:38:37,730 --> 00:38:40,532
What?
960
00:38:40,600 --> 00:38:41,934
Bully for you, Knope.
961
00:38:42,002 --> 00:38:43,102
That's amazing.
962
00:38:43,169 --> 00:38:44,803
Yeah, she got approached
by the DNC,
963
00:38:44,871 --> 00:38:46,972
and they think she has
a great shot to win.
964
00:38:47,040 --> 00:38:49,808
Indiana native,
supremely qualified,
965
00:38:49,876 --> 00:38:52,478
and she wrote
that she wanted to be governor
966
00:38:52,545 --> 00:38:55,314
in her kindergarten
dream journal.
967
00:38:55,382 --> 00:38:58,083
Just makes sense.
968
00:39:01,188 --> 00:39:02,488
So I'm running for governor.
969
00:39:02,556 --> 00:39:04,190
Yeah!
970
00:39:04,257 --> 00:39:05,958
Ben is gonna be
running my campaign
971
00:39:06,026 --> 00:39:07,393
because he's a super genius,
972
00:39:07,461 --> 00:39:10,429
and he's got a tight,
compact, little body
973
00:39:10,497 --> 00:39:13,432
like an Italian sports car.
974
00:39:13,500 --> 00:39:15,701
But right now I'd like
to make a toast.
975
00:39:15,769 --> 00:39:19,105
When we worked here together,
976
00:39:19,172 --> 00:39:22,808
we fought, scratched,
and clawed
977
00:39:22,876 --> 00:39:25,678
to make people's lives
a tiny bit better.
978
00:39:25,746 --> 00:39:28,347
That's what public service
is all about--
979
00:39:28,415 --> 00:39:31,083
Small, incremental change
every day.
980
00:39:31,151 --> 00:39:33,419
Teddy Roosevelt once said,
981
00:39:33,487 --> 00:39:36,555
"Far and away, the best prize
that life has to offer
982
00:39:36,623 --> 00:39:40,359
is a chance to work hard
at work worth doing."
983
00:39:40,427 --> 00:39:44,764
And I would add
that what makes work worth doing
984
00:39:44,831 --> 00:39:47,467
is getting to do it
with people that you love.
985
00:39:47,534 --> 00:39:50,002
I started my career
more than 30 years ago
986
00:39:50,070 --> 00:39:51,471
in the Parks and Recreation
Department
987
00:39:51,538 --> 00:39:53,973
right here in Pawnee, Indiana.
988
00:39:54,041 --> 00:39:56,209
I've had a lot
of different jobs
989
00:39:56,276 --> 00:39:58,578
including two terms
as your governor,
990
00:39:58,645 --> 00:40:02,815
and soon a new,
unknown challenge awaits me,
991
00:40:02,883 --> 00:40:07,086
which to me, even now,
is thrilling
992
00:40:07,154 --> 00:40:08,387
because I love the work.
993
00:40:08,455 --> 00:40:11,023
Not to say that public service
isn't sexy,
994
00:40:11,091 --> 00:40:13,226
because it definitely is,
995
00:40:13,294 --> 00:40:16,229
but that's not why we do it.
996
00:40:16,297 --> 00:40:17,964
We do it
because we get the chance
997
00:40:18,032 --> 00:40:21,701
to work hard
at work worth doing...
998
00:40:21,769 --> 00:40:25,038
alongside a team of people
we love.
999
00:40:25,105 --> 00:40:30,176
So I thank those people
who've walked with me,
1000
00:40:30,244 --> 00:40:33,179
and I thank you for this honor.
1001
00:40:33,247 --> 00:40:35,648
Now, go find your team,
and get to work.
1002
00:40:42,156 --> 00:40:44,224
In addition to Governor
Knope's honorary doctorate
1003
00:40:44,292 --> 00:40:46,059
from the School
of Public Policy,
1004
00:40:46,127 --> 00:40:49,729
in recognition of all she's done
for the people of Indiana,
1005
00:40:49,797 --> 00:40:53,967
the campus library
will henceforth bear her name.
1006
00:40:56,537 --> 00:40:59,739
[under breath]
A [bleep] library?
1007
00:41:02,710 --> 00:41:05,545
Yeah, that should do it.
The swing is fixed.
1008
00:41:05,613 --> 00:41:08,048
- Yeah!
- All right.
1009
00:41:08,115 --> 00:41:10,216
Well, there you have it, sir.
1010
00:41:10,284 --> 00:41:12,586
Another problem solved
by the hard work
1011
00:41:12,653 --> 00:41:15,188
of dedicated public servants.
1012
00:41:15,256 --> 00:41:17,290
Okay, great.
1013
00:41:17,358 --> 00:41:18,892
Bye.
1014
00:41:18,960 --> 00:41:21,027
Yeah, that's about right.
1015
00:41:21,095 --> 00:41:23,096
Okay, well...
1016
00:41:25,232 --> 00:41:26,232
Hang on.
1017
00:41:26,233 --> 00:41:27,500
Gayle made me promise
1018
00:41:27,568 --> 00:41:29,569
to get a quick picture
just for old times' sake.
1019
00:41:29,637 --> 00:41:31,773
Good idea.
Garry had a good idea.
1020
00:41:32,840 --> 00:41:34,207
Oh, the lighting's all wrong.
1021
00:41:34,275 --> 00:41:35,595
I'm gonna
send you a glamour shot.
1022
00:41:35,610 --> 00:41:36,843
Just Photoshop me in later.
1023
00:41:36,911 --> 00:41:38,412
I'm not gonna show up
in that picture anyway
1024
00:41:38,479 --> 00:41:39,813
because I'm a vampire.
1025
00:41:39,881 --> 00:41:42,081
Hey, babe, for this picture,
should I be Burt Macklin,
1026
00:41:42,116 --> 00:41:44,518
Johnny Karate,
or my new character,
1027
00:41:44,585 --> 00:41:47,187
Sergeant Thunderfist, MD?
1028
00:41:47,255 --> 00:41:48,522
Where did you get that?
1029
00:41:48,589 --> 00:41:49,709
I found it in the sandbox.
1030
00:41:49,757 --> 00:41:50,891
Ew!
1031
00:41:50,958 --> 00:41:52,192
Go Macklin.
1032
00:41:52,260 --> 00:41:54,161
- Macklin's the hottest.
- Get on with it.
1033
00:41:54,228 --> 00:41:56,363
I can't hold this smile forever.
I look ridiculous.
1034
00:41:56,475 --> 00:41:58,376
Okay, hang on.
Okay.
1035
00:42:01,577 --> 00:42:03,083
You ready, babe?
1036
00:42:04,617 --> 00:42:05,820
Yes.
1037
00:42:07,754 --> 00:42:08,916
I'm ready.
1038
00:42:10,954 --> 00:42:14,022
♪ Well it's all right ♪
1039
00:42:14,056 --> 00:42:15,821
♪ Riding around in the breeze ♪
1040
00:42:15,855 --> 00:42:19,524
♪ Well it's all right ♪
1041
00:42:19,558 --> 00:42:21,491
♪ If you live the life
you please ♪
1042
00:42:21,525 --> 00:42:25,226
♪ Well it's all right ♪
1043
00:42:25,260 --> 00:42:27,296
♪ Doing the best you can ♪
1044
00:42:27,330 --> 00:42:30,863
♪ Well it's all right ♪
1045
00:42:30,897 --> 00:42:33,134
♪ As long as you lend a hand ♪
1046
00:42:43,000 --> 00:42:45,827
That is a series wrap
on Parks and Recreation.
1047
00:42:46,350 --> 00:42:51,350
Sync by Alice | Thank you honeybunny
www.addic7ed.com