1
00:00:09,152 --> 00:00:12,154
Who's ready for Rick's
famous spaghetti?!
2
00:00:12,155 --> 00:00:13,697
I love Spaghetti Thursdays!
3
00:00:13,698 --> 00:00:16,116
Oh, my God, Rick, i-it's like
it's better every time!
4
00:00:16,117 --> 00:00:17,367
Hell yeah, you like that?!
5
00:00:17,368 --> 00:00:19,202
That's-a some good spaghetti!
6
00:00:19,203 --> 00:00:21,580
Grandpa Rick,
I'm skull emoji but words.
7
00:00:21,581 --> 00:00:24,082
Sauce? More sauce?
Oh, we gots the sauce!
8
00:00:24,083 --> 00:00:26,418
Dad, you... you had
a job interview, right?
9
00:00:26,419 --> 00:00:27,836
Bombed it!
10
00:00:27,837 --> 00:00:29,713
But it's nothing a little
Bolognese won't cure!
11
00:00:29,714 --> 00:00:31,757
Dad, this noodle is sooo tender.
12
00:00:31,758 --> 00:00:35,260
A little spicy!
A little sweet!
13
00:00:35,261 --> 00:00:36,595
It's so nice that we're talking,
you know,
14
00:00:36,596 --> 00:00:37,804
all... all... all talking
15
00:00:37,805 --> 00:00:39,056
because we're a family
and everything,
16
00:00:39,057 --> 00:00:40,682
and this a good time
we're having.
17
00:00:40,683 --> 00:00:41,767
Is there any more?!
18
00:00:41,768 --> 00:00:43,143
Seconds?
Thirds?
19
00:00:43,144 --> 00:00:46,188
We spa-gots as much
as you can spag-eat!
20
00:00:46,189 --> 00:00:47,272
Rick, I-I got to know, like,
21
00:00:47,273 --> 00:00:49,691
wh-what's the secret
ingredient...
22
00:00:49,692 --> 00:00:52,110
God, no! Why?
Why? No!
23
00:00:52,111 --> 00:00:53,361
Why is it always
this shit with you?!
24
00:00:53,362 --> 00:00:55,030
O-Of course it's a person!
25
00:00:55,031 --> 00:00:57,282
Rick, why couldn't
it just be spaghetti?
26
00:00:57,283 --> 00:01:05,283
♪
27
00:01:31,150 --> 00:01:32,734
Rick:
I'm just going to say this
28
00:01:32,735 --> 00:01:34,486
as simply as possible
and let you not believe me...
29
00:01:34,487 --> 00:01:37,239
on this planet, people that kill
themselves turn into spaghetti.
30
00:01:37,240 --> 00:01:38,490
What?
31
00:01:38,491 --> 00:01:40,743
I know, you're a visual learner,
so follow me.
32
00:01:42,411 --> 00:01:44,246
Oh, hi, Doctor Hotpenis.
33
00:01:44,247 --> 00:01:45,914
You're not supposed to
bring patients...
34
00:01:45,915 --> 00:01:49,376
Hi, Michael. It's okay.
This alien boy has space cancer
35
00:01:49,377 --> 00:01:51,503
and his dying wish
is to see deader people
36
00:01:51,504 --> 00:01:53,004
so he can feel superior.
37
00:01:53,005 --> 00:01:55,340
All you had to say.
38
00:01:55,341 --> 00:01:57,008
Check it out. Murdered.
39
00:01:57,009 --> 00:01:58,552
Oh, gross!
40
00:01:58,553 --> 00:02:00,137
Car crash.
Oh!
41
00:02:00,138 --> 00:02:02,180
And suicide.
42
00:02:02,181 --> 00:02:03,849
Ugh, Rick, I don't...
43
00:02:03,850 --> 00:02:06,017
Wait, what is that smell?
44
00:02:06,018 --> 00:02:07,853
You know God damn well
what it is, baby.
45
00:02:07,854 --> 00:02:09,521
Get in here.
Oh, don't do that!
46
00:02:09,522 --> 00:02:11,815
You've been doing it for weeks
every spaghetti night!
47
00:02:11,816 --> 00:02:13,650
Come on, Morty.
Choo choo plane!
48
00:02:13,651 --> 00:02:15,569
Gross!
Come on!
49
00:02:15,570 --> 00:02:16,820
God damn!
50
00:02:16,821 --> 00:02:18,864
Telling you!
Why?! How?!
51
00:02:18,865 --> 00:02:21,074
Their cortisol increases
the starch content
52
00:02:21,075 --> 00:02:22,659
in their bloodstream,
changing their intestines
53
00:02:22,660 --> 00:02:24,286
into one long spaghetti noodle,
54
00:02:24,287 --> 00:02:26,830
and the surrounding tissues
into a spicy-sweet hematoma
55
00:02:26,831 --> 00:02:28,665
that we would call a Bolognese.
56
00:02:28,666 --> 00:02:30,709
But it takes
a lot of cortisol...
57
00:02:30,710 --> 00:02:32,127
like a suicidal amount.
58
00:02:32,128 --> 00:02:33,503
I-It's almost better cold!
59
00:02:33,504 --> 00:02:35,338
Wouldn't go that far,
don't be a hipster.
60
00:02:35,339 --> 00:02:36,548
Excuse me.
61
00:02:36,549 --> 00:02:38,633
Are you two eating a corpse?
62
00:02:38,634 --> 00:02:40,051
It's okay!
I-It's spaghetti.
63
00:02:40,052 --> 00:02:41,344
Morty, they don't know
what that is.
64
00:02:41,345 --> 00:02:42,721
I'm calling the police!
65
00:02:42,722 --> 00:02:44,472
Before you do that, just...
No, Rick, stop...
66
00:02:44,473 --> 00:02:46,057
What?!
Where am I?
67
00:02:46,058 --> 00:02:47,976
In a morgue, eating
bodies! We're what?!
68
00:02:47,977 --> 00:02:50,854
Stop using that thing!
What thing? Who are we?
69
00:02:50,855 --> 00:02:52,689
We were just leaving.
All you had to say!
70
00:02:52,690 --> 00:02:54,774
Whose car is this?
Whose sun visor is this?
71
00:02:54,775 --> 00:02:56,234
What's a sun?
72
00:02:56,235 --> 00:03:00,197
Jesus, sorry,
that's always embarrassing.
73
00:03:00,198 --> 00:03:02,741
But you see what I mean now?
Best spaghetti in the galaxy
74
00:03:02,742 --> 00:03:04,159
and it's 100% guilt-free.
75
00:03:04,160 --> 00:03:05,869
I wanna know their names.
Who?
76
00:03:05,870 --> 00:03:07,329
Michael? Coroner Number One?
77
00:03:07,330 --> 00:03:09,581
The people we've been
eating every spaghetti night!
78
00:03:09,582 --> 00:03:11,082
Do you even know their names?
79
00:03:11,083 --> 00:03:12,834
I'm not giving you your
spaghettises' names!
80
00:03:12,835 --> 00:03:15,128
You've found my line,
Morty! I-I find that ghoulish!
81
00:03:15,129 --> 00:03:17,339
I-I want their names
o-or I'm telling Mom
82
00:03:17,340 --> 00:03:18,548
and no more spaghetti night!
83
00:03:18,549 --> 00:03:19,925
You suck! Where's the thing?
84
00:03:19,926 --> 00:03:21,593
Where's the "Men in
Black" thing? Names!
85
00:03:21,594 --> 00:03:22,844
And if you know
the fuckin' names
86
00:03:22,845 --> 00:03:24,054
of your spaghettis, that's it?
87
00:03:24,055 --> 00:03:25,472
This is done? It's all I ask!
88
00:03:25,473 --> 00:03:27,224
You won't get overwhelmed
with even more guilt
89
00:03:27,225 --> 00:03:28,767
and then demand to go
to their fuckin' funeral?
90
00:03:28,768 --> 00:03:30,769
Just their names
and then I'm done.
91
00:03:30,770 --> 00:03:32,062
I promise.
92
00:03:32,063 --> 00:03:34,397
I fucking hate you.
93
00:03:34,398 --> 00:03:36,024
I just want to pay my respects!
94
00:03:36,025 --> 00:03:37,609
The only reason
you're still alive
95
00:03:37,610 --> 00:03:41,364
is because you don't turn
delicious when you die.
96
00:03:44,909 --> 00:03:47,160
Thank you for that
moment of silence.
97
00:03:47,161 --> 00:03:49,412
I'd like to open it up
to the congregation,
98
00:03:49,413 --> 00:03:53,626
if anyone would like to say
a few words about Lawrence.
99
00:03:54,460 --> 00:03:56,337
[ Coughs ]
100
00:03:58,839 --> 00:04:01,508
Or... another moment of silence.
101
00:04:01,509 --> 00:04:03,927
Geez, no wonder
he killed himself.
102
00:04:03,928 --> 00:04:05,303
Okay, let's...
103
00:04:05,304 --> 00:04:06,346
Oh, for...
104
00:04:06,347 --> 00:04:08,056
Hi. Um...
105
00:04:08,057 --> 00:04:10,976
I just want to be
honest about something.
106
00:04:10,977 --> 00:04:12,602
After Lawrence died,
107
00:04:12,603 --> 00:04:15,105
we, uh, ate him.
108
00:04:15,106 --> 00:04:17,232
[ Gasping, murmuring
] Wait, we're not...
109
00:04:17,233 --> 00:04:20,110
werewolves or... or anything,
we... we come from a planet,
110
00:04:20,111 --> 00:04:22,696
where, to us, when
you guys kill yourselves,
111
00:04:22,697 --> 00:04:25,824
you turn into what my
planet considers food.
112
00:04:25,825 --> 00:04:28,785
Spaghetti. It
brought us together.
113
00:04:28,786 --> 00:04:31,037
Lawrence brought us together.
114
00:04:31,038 --> 00:04:34,082
It just felt wrong not
having anyone know that.
115
00:04:34,083 --> 00:04:35,667
But he was delicious.
116
00:04:35,668 --> 00:04:40,046
I-I hope that
helps make it right.
117
00:04:40,047 --> 00:04:41,631
That should do it, buddy.
118
00:04:41,632 --> 00:04:43,676
Everybody enjoy your closure.
119
00:04:45,261 --> 00:04:48,305
So we were eating... people.
120
00:04:48,306 --> 00:04:49,681
I-I'm afraid so.
121
00:04:49,682 --> 00:04:52,684
They were so... spaghettiesque.
122
00:04:52,685 --> 00:04:54,019
Yes, they were.
123
00:04:54,020 --> 00:04:56,271
It's going to be... hard to...
124
00:04:56,272 --> 00:04:58,023
Hard to put out
of your mind, yes,
125
00:04:58,024 --> 00:05:00,608
which is why I thought it
best to keep you all in the dark.
126
00:05:00,609 --> 00:05:01,735
So...
127
00:05:01,736 --> 00:05:03,403
Morty ruined spaghetti night.
128
00:05:03,404 --> 00:05:05,196
- Correct.
- Summer! It was people!
129
00:05:05,197 --> 00:05:06,906
It was people, Summer.
130
00:05:06,907 --> 00:05:08,533
Which is disgusting.
131
00:05:08,534 --> 00:05:10,535
And not cool to lie about.
132
00:05:10,536 --> 00:05:11,703
Correct.
133
00:05:11,704 --> 00:05:13,872
But it should also
be noted, to Morty,
134
00:05:13,873 --> 00:05:15,290
that it's not cool to tattle.
135
00:05:15,291 --> 00:05:16,916
Dad! They were delicious!
136
00:05:16,917 --> 00:05:19,002
So keep eating
them! We can't now!
137
00:05:19,003 --> 00:05:20,086
Because of you!
138
00:05:20,087 --> 00:05:21,296
Sorry, [Clears throat] Morty.
139
00:05:21,297 --> 00:05:23,089
That was terrible parenting.
140
00:05:23,090 --> 00:05:26,051
You did the "right" thing.
141
00:05:26,052 --> 00:05:29,554
We are technically very
happy to be better informed.
142
00:05:29,555 --> 00:05:30,930
First octopus, now this.
143
00:05:30,931 --> 00:05:32,474
Have... Have we thought
about just giving up
144
00:05:32,475 --> 00:05:34,601
and joining the fascist
half of the country?
145
00:05:34,602 --> 00:05:35,727
- No!
- No!
146
00:05:35,728 --> 00:05:37,312
Just saying, they
get to do more.
147
00:05:37,313 --> 00:05:40,483
Well, I guess I'll go to my room
since everyone hates me now.
148
00:05:41,984 --> 00:05:43,234
Oh. Sorry.
149
00:05:43,235 --> 00:05:44,569
- Good night, Morty.
- Good night, Morty.
150
00:05:44,570 --> 00:05:46,655
Goodnight, Morty.
151
00:05:46,656 --> 00:05:49,199
Hey, big boy. Are you depressed?
152
00:05:49,200 --> 00:05:51,659
Oooooh, mama likes depression.
153
00:05:51,660 --> 00:05:53,453
Oopsie, I spilled my milk.
154
00:05:53,454 --> 00:05:54,829
Now we're both sad.
155
00:05:54,830 --> 00:05:56,206
I'm a bad family
therapist farm girl.
156
00:05:56,207 --> 00:05:59,876
[ Knock on window ]
157
00:05:59,877 --> 00:06:01,753
Space Ship: Hello, Morty Smith.
158
00:06:01,754 --> 00:06:04,798
You are invited to 41-Kepler B.
159
00:06:04,799 --> 00:06:07,133
You know it as Spaghetti Planet.
160
00:06:07,134 --> 00:06:08,218
You're not in trouble.
161
00:06:08,219 --> 00:06:10,261
We just want to talk.
162
00:06:10,262 --> 00:06:12,639
Can that thing
support my weight?
163
00:06:12,640 --> 00:06:14,307
It should.
164
00:06:14,308 --> 00:06:16,101
Uh, o-okay...
165
00:06:16,102 --> 00:06:17,435
um... up here?
166
00:06:17,436 --> 00:06:19,062
Oh, uh, geez.
167
00:06:19,063 --> 00:06:20,480
Ever heard of a ramp?
168
00:06:20,481 --> 00:06:22,691
This is a ramp. Uh-huh.
169
00:06:25,069 --> 00:06:27,862
Hi, Morty, I'm the
president of this planet.
170
00:06:27,863 --> 00:06:29,906
I saw the video of
you at that funeral.
171
00:06:29,907 --> 00:06:31,408
I'm sorry. Don't be.
172
00:06:31,409 --> 00:06:33,952
It was quite the... revelation.
173
00:06:33,953 --> 00:06:35,120
Uh, would you...
174
00:06:35,121 --> 00:06:36,788
mind... showing us?
175
00:06:36,789 --> 00:06:38,957
Uh, this is the..."spaghetti"
176
00:06:38,958 --> 00:06:41,167
of a person that
took their own life.
177
00:06:41,168 --> 00:06:42,961
They did consent to be eaten.
178
00:06:42,962 --> 00:06:44,963
Uh, okay.
179
00:06:44,964 --> 00:06:45,923
[ Gags ]
180
00:06:45,924 --> 00:06:47,340
[ Retches ]
181
00:06:47,341 --> 00:06:48,925
[ Slurping ]
182
00:06:48,926 --> 00:06:51,469
Wow, yeah, a-amazing as always.
183
00:06:51,470 --> 00:06:52,971
N-Not gonna lie.
184
00:06:52,972 --> 00:06:56,266
And would you consider
yourself a typical Earthian?
185
00:06:56,267 --> 00:06:59,602
Well, on Earth, it's
considered inferior to be typical,
186
00:06:59,603 --> 00:07:02,230
so we're all very
special and different,
187
00:07:02,231 --> 00:07:04,482
but we definitely
all do like spaghetti.
188
00:07:04,483 --> 00:07:07,318
All... eight billion
of you? Oooh.
189
00:07:07,319 --> 00:07:10,280
Morty, how would you
feel about being a kind of...
190
00:07:10,281 --> 00:07:13,783
ambassador? A liaison
between our worlds.
191
00:07:13,784 --> 00:07:15,452
Oh. Now hold on.
192
00:07:15,453 --> 00:07:17,412
I-I went to that
funeral because...
193
00:07:17,413 --> 00:07:18,872
Because you felt bad.
194
00:07:18,873 --> 00:07:21,040
Because you didn't
have permission.
195
00:07:21,041 --> 00:07:22,792
Show him.
196
00:07:22,793 --> 00:07:25,128
My name is Tanya Radcliffe.
197
00:07:25,129 --> 00:07:27,755
I've been living
in pain for years,
198
00:07:27,756 --> 00:07:31,759
I've lost all my loved
ones, I've got nothing.
199
00:07:31,760 --> 00:07:35,972
So when doctors told me I
could finally have the "right to die"
200
00:07:35,973 --> 00:07:39,434
if I agree to be dinner
for some alien boy,
201
00:07:39,435 --> 00:07:44,064
I simply said, "I
hope I'm delicious."
202
00:07:45,191 --> 00:07:46,441
God damn.
203
00:07:46,442 --> 00:07:49,444
Mm, and would you say
that makes it taste better?
204
00:07:49,445 --> 00:07:51,988
It makes it go
down a lot easier.
205
00:07:51,989 --> 00:07:53,573
Oh, I like that.
206
00:07:53,574 --> 00:07:56,576
Maybe it's time we allow
some people the right to die
207
00:07:56,577 --> 00:07:57,911
and be delicious.
208
00:07:57,912 --> 00:07:59,829
Please feel free
to finish Tanya.
209
00:07:59,830 --> 00:08:00,997
It is what she wanted.
210
00:08:00,998 --> 00:08:02,957
No. No, I-I-I think I'm good.
211
00:08:02,958 --> 00:08:04,042
Thanks.
212
00:08:04,043 --> 00:08:07,129
Tanya, you really were tasty.
213
00:08:09,131 --> 00:08:12,342
Actually, can I take her to go?
214
00:08:12,343 --> 00:08:14,802
Who's ready for more
ethical spaghetti?!
215
00:08:14,803 --> 00:08:16,804
Me! I love this ethical shit!
216
00:08:16,805 --> 00:08:18,765
Full admission, I
was fine before too!
217
00:08:18,766 --> 00:08:20,308
God, this is so good!
218
00:08:20,309 --> 00:08:21,726
Pass the parmeesian!
219
00:08:21,727 --> 00:08:22,936
Where's Dad?
220
00:08:22,937 --> 00:08:24,395
Why does he keep
missing spaghetti night?
221
00:08:24,396 --> 00:08:26,439
I guess he got butthurt
because Morty high-roaded him
222
00:08:26,440 --> 00:08:28,191
and got us the
delicious spaghetti
223
00:08:28,192 --> 00:08:29,734
without all the
lies and nihilism.
224
00:08:29,735 --> 00:08:33,071
And another cheer for the
added bonus of no Rick...
225
00:08:33,072 --> 00:08:34,739
Boom. Sorry to interrupt
226
00:08:34,740 --> 00:08:36,366
Morty's perfect spaghetti night,
227
00:08:36,367 --> 00:08:37,784
but thought he'd wanna see this.
228
00:08:37,785 --> 00:08:39,285
Whoa, what the fuck is that?!
229
00:08:39,286 --> 00:08:42,830
"Morty-O's Suicide
Spaghetti is 100% ethical,
230
00:08:42,831 --> 00:08:44,415
single-origin pasta."
231
00:08:44,416 --> 00:08:45,750
Oh, dear God.
232
00:08:45,751 --> 00:08:47,418
Lemme guess, you
went back to the planet,
233
00:08:47,419 --> 00:08:49,504
gave some thoughtful
insight to their leader,
234
00:08:49,505 --> 00:08:52,090
and now they're selling their
dead at every Space Walmart.
235
00:08:52,091 --> 00:08:55,009
I-I did but I didn't
say to do this!
236
00:08:55,010 --> 00:08:56,553
Is this people, or not people?
237
00:08:56,554 --> 00:08:59,639
I-I just need to know how much
I should pretend to be upset.
238
00:08:59,640 --> 00:09:01,849
This seems to be Roger.
239
00:09:01,850 --> 00:09:03,268
Hi. I'm Roger Wayne Marder.
240
00:09:03,269 --> 00:09:04,978
I was a serial
killer and cannibal,
241
00:09:04,979 --> 00:09:06,896
and now I get to kill
myself and be food for you,
242
00:09:06,897 --> 00:09:10,191
which I suppose is a silver
lining to all my misdeeds.
243
00:09:10,192 --> 00:09:13,236
Anyway, please enjoy me.
244
00:09:13,237 --> 00:09:15,280
So "yes" to people?
245
00:09:15,281 --> 00:09:17,657
Wow. I-I mean,
on the bright side,
246
00:09:17,658 --> 00:09:19,409
I-I feel like one
could look at this
247
00:09:19,410 --> 00:09:23,037
as a really nice epilogue t-to
a story about telling the truth.
248
00:09:23,038 --> 00:09:25,832
Uh-huh, care to
see that epilogue?
249
00:09:25,833 --> 00:09:26,874
[ Horns honking ]
250
00:09:26,875 --> 00:09:29,627
What is all this?
251
00:09:29,628 --> 00:09:32,630
Cans of spaghetti selling out
to every neighboring planet.
252
00:09:32,631 --> 00:09:36,634
Wanna go see how
ethical it is down there?
253
00:09:36,635 --> 00:09:39,304
This is Spaghetti
Planet? What happened?
254
00:09:39,305 --> 00:09:40,597
You happened.
255
00:09:40,598 --> 00:09:43,182
You happened all
over those billboards.
256
00:09:43,183 --> 00:09:44,767
Oh, geez, oh, no.
257
00:09:44,768 --> 00:09:48,104
See that? They call that
bridge "The Most Scenic Jump."
258
00:09:48,105 --> 00:09:49,647
There used to be safety rails.
259
00:09:49,648 --> 00:09:52,734
They melted them down
for giant spaghetti strainers.
260
00:09:52,735 --> 00:09:54,152
You wanna turn on the radio?
261
00:09:54,153 --> 00:09:55,820
I get it, it's all Enya.
262
00:09:55,821 --> 00:09:57,655
Nope, all morning zoo teams.
263
00:09:57,656 --> 00:09:59,657
Just patter. No songs.
264
00:09:59,658 --> 00:10:01,159
Oh, and for TV?
265
00:10:01,160 --> 00:10:03,745
Wall-to-wall reality television,
but not the good kind.
266
00:10:03,746 --> 00:10:05,997
It's like their whole planet
was bought by Discovery.
267
00:10:05,998 --> 00:10:07,665
Jesus Christ,
this is depressing.
268
00:10:07,666 --> 00:10:09,500
That's definitely
what they're going for.
269
00:10:09,501 --> 00:10:10,835
Look at this shit.
270
00:10:10,836 --> 00:10:13,296
They dyed their
sun institutional gray.
271
00:10:13,297 --> 00:10:15,590
That's not easy,
kind of impressed.
272
00:10:15,591 --> 00:10:17,925
And all of it is thanks to...
273
00:10:17,926 --> 00:10:19,218
Oh, God.
274
00:10:19,219 --> 00:10:21,179
I'm a murderer.
275
00:10:21,180 --> 00:10:22,388
Oh, no, Morty.
276
00:10:22,389 --> 00:10:24,767
What you did was
much more indirect.
277
00:10:26,894 --> 00:10:28,478
I understand your
concerns, but look around.
278
00:10:28,479 --> 00:10:30,480
With what's coming in from
intergalactic spaghetti trade,
279
00:10:30,481 --> 00:10:34,652
we've decreased our debt,
are making a lot of money.
280
00:10:36,153 --> 00:10:38,529
We've got clean energy.
That space where you paused
281
00:10:38,530 --> 00:10:40,156
is where you should have
said "mental healthcare."
282
00:10:40,157 --> 00:10:43,368
Alright, we had to put our
fingers on the scale, a little.
283
00:10:43,369 --> 00:10:46,162
But if we stop this, the
supply chain crumbles
284
00:10:46,163 --> 00:10:48,122
and kills the global economy.
285
00:10:48,123 --> 00:10:49,791
How many people
will suffer then?
286
00:10:49,792 --> 00:10:54,003
Okay, tough problem,
definitely a spicy meat-a-ball.
287
00:10:54,004 --> 00:10:55,546
Bu-Bu-But we can
fix it. Right, Rick?
288
00:10:55,547 --> 00:10:57,632
You mean me.
You want me to fix it.
289
00:10:57,633 --> 00:10:58,966
Uh, a moment?
290
00:10:58,967 --> 00:11:00,134
Yes, I want you to fix it.
291
00:11:00,135 --> 00:11:01,469
None of this would have happened
292
00:11:01,470 --> 00:11:03,054
if you'd been honest
about the spaghetti.
293
00:11:03,055 --> 00:11:05,598
Morty, I lied to protect you.
You told the truth to hurt me.
294
00:11:05,599 --> 00:11:07,558
I can't travel the galaxy
with you if every time
295
00:11:07,559 --> 00:11:09,143
we come near a fucked up system,
296
00:11:09,144 --> 00:11:11,396
you leap into its wires
and electrocute yourself.
297
00:11:11,397 --> 00:11:13,439
I promise to stop. You what?
298
00:11:13,440 --> 00:11:14,982
If you help me, I-I promise
299
00:11:14,983 --> 00:11:16,651
I'll never look under
the curtain at a Rick thing
300
00:11:16,652 --> 00:11:18,569
to figure out what's
bad about it ever again.
301
00:11:18,570 --> 00:11:20,488
And you can never say no to me.
302
00:11:20,489 --> 00:11:21,614
What are you, Keith Raniere?
303
00:11:21,615 --> 00:11:22,907
For two weeks. Fine.
304
00:11:22,908 --> 00:11:24,617
My grandson kissed
my ass so I'm in.
305
00:11:24,618 --> 00:11:27,704
Okay, so, w-we just need
to figure out something else
306
00:11:27,705 --> 00:11:30,665
besides people to
put in the cans, right?
307
00:11:30,666 --> 00:11:34,127
But people are the spaghetti,
that's the whole thing.
308
00:11:34,128 --> 00:11:36,421
But what if they weren't?
309
00:11:36,422 --> 00:11:38,297
I'm listening. Me, too.
310
00:11:38,298 --> 00:11:42,301
I mean, what if we make
something like a person?
311
00:11:42,302 --> 00:11:43,594
Like...
312
00:11:43,595 --> 00:11:44,804
Rick, y-you're always
doing clones, right?
313
00:11:44,805 --> 00:11:46,305
What are you suggesting here?
314
00:11:46,306 --> 00:11:48,474
A sped-up life span and
indoctrination program?
315
00:11:48,475 --> 00:11:50,601
Limiting their exposure to
the world and convincing them
316
00:11:50,602 --> 00:11:53,479
that becoming
spaghetti is their destiny?
317
00:11:53,480 --> 00:11:55,940
[ Alarm blaring, dogs barking ]
318
00:11:55,941 --> 00:11:58,109
♪
319
00:11:58,110 --> 00:12:00,153
I won't be delicious for them!
320
00:12:00,154 --> 00:12:03,698
I love you, Clone-5617B!
321
00:12:03,699 --> 00:12:04,658
[ Gunshots ]
322
00:12:04,659 --> 00:12:07,869
[ Bodies thud ]
323
00:12:07,870 --> 00:12:10,413
That was some speed run
of "Never Let Me Go," huh?
324
00:12:10,414 --> 00:12:11,789
Spoilers, Rick!
325
00:12:11,790 --> 00:12:14,041
Eh, I guess all clone stories
turn out the same way.
326
00:12:14,042 --> 00:12:17,962
So, we're back to the regular
people, regular suicides?
327
00:12:17,963 --> 00:12:19,172
No, no, hold on, hold on.
328
00:12:19,173 --> 00:12:20,465
We can do this.
329
00:12:20,466 --> 00:12:23,050
Maybe we make
them less... people.
330
00:12:23,051 --> 00:12:26,262
H-How much of a people do they
have to be to become spaghetti?
331
00:12:26,263 --> 00:12:27,805
Oooooh, gray areas!
332
00:12:27,806 --> 00:12:29,182
My specialty!
333
00:12:29,183 --> 00:12:30,725
Subject one.
334
00:12:30,726 --> 00:12:32,685
No frontal lobe, no
empathy centers.
335
00:12:32,686 --> 00:12:35,354
Otherwise the same
physiology as a person.
336
00:12:35,355 --> 00:12:38,274
Unfortunately, to this guy,
337
00:12:38,275 --> 00:12:40,151
there's no difference
between life and death.
338
00:12:40,152 --> 00:12:42,069
So no spaghetti.
339
00:12:42,070 --> 00:12:43,780
Then there's this one.
340
00:12:43,781 --> 00:12:45,990
It's in horrible, unimaginable
pain from the moment it's born.
341
00:12:45,991 --> 00:12:47,325
Oh, geez, oh, no, Rick!
342
00:12:47,326 --> 00:12:49,494
And so I didn't even
bother to make it
343
00:12:49,495 --> 00:12:51,162
because I knew you'd take issue.
344
00:12:51,163 --> 00:12:53,247
Even though you'd be doing
it a favor by ending its life.
345
00:12:53,248 --> 00:12:55,333
Fuck you. You might want to
examine that Trolley Problem
346
00:12:55,334 --> 00:12:56,751
at some point, Morty.
347
00:12:56,752 --> 00:12:58,544
Anyway, here's the last one.
348
00:12:58,545 --> 00:13:00,338
Kept the brain stem,
internal motor functions.
349
00:13:00,339 --> 00:13:03,716
But essentially just a
headless, boneless torso.
350
00:13:03,717 --> 00:13:06,010
There's... spaghetti
inside that?
351
00:13:06,011 --> 00:13:07,178
Theoretically, yes.
352
00:13:07,179 --> 00:13:10,348
The problem is
the... y-you know.
353
00:13:10,349 --> 00:13:14,477
Cou-Could you, um, like...
354
00:13:14,478 --> 00:13:17,188
What is that? Wh-What
are you... Is this charades?
355
00:13:17,189 --> 00:13:18,606
Okay, okay, are
you making a fist?
356
00:13:18,607 --> 00:13:20,691
W-Wait, is that
supposed to be a phone?
357
00:13:20,692 --> 00:13:22,735
Ah, fuck it, just
spell it out for me.
358
00:13:22,736 --> 00:13:26,364
Um, maybe give
them a claw-like hand
359
00:13:26,365 --> 00:13:29,951
so they can, ya know,
stab themselves to death?
360
00:13:29,952 --> 00:13:31,369
All you had to say.
361
00:13:31,370 --> 00:13:35,456
Well, this is some solution
you guys have cooked up.
362
00:13:35,457 --> 00:13:43,457
♪
363
00:13:59,356 --> 00:14:01,315
Spaghetti! Technically.
364
00:14:01,316 --> 00:14:02,608
Good enough for me.
365
00:14:02,609 --> 00:14:04,777
We need to fill 100,000
cans by the weekend.
366
00:14:04,778 --> 00:14:08,740
So let's fire up
these chunky boys!
367
00:14:09,950 --> 00:14:13,119
Torso's rights! Torso's rights!
368
00:14:13,120 --> 00:14:17,582
The new spaghetti sucks!
We want authentic spaghetti!
369
00:14:17,583 --> 00:14:18,833
Oh, were you...
370
00:14:18,834 --> 00:14:20,751
Wait, you're gonna
blow yourself up?
371
00:14:20,752 --> 00:14:22,587
Yeah, but if you wanna do it...
372
00:14:22,588 --> 00:14:25,006
Well, you clearly have a
morally superior position,
373
00:14:25,007 --> 00:14:27,174
so please, go ahead.
374
00:14:27,175 --> 00:14:28,467
You just want me to kill myself
375
00:14:28,468 --> 00:14:30,052
so you can eat
the spaghetti, right?
376
00:14:30,053 --> 00:14:31,721
Fuckin' alien piece of shit.
377
00:14:31,722 --> 00:14:33,390
Oh, fuck you! Fuck you!
378
00:14:35,684 --> 00:14:38,978
[ All coughing ]
379
00:14:38,979 --> 00:14:42,231
How long does a
society take to collapse?
380
00:14:42,232 --> 00:14:43,566
Let's find out.
381
00:14:43,567 --> 00:14:44,609
[ Horns honking ]
382
00:14:44,610 --> 00:14:45,943
Ay! What's the fuckin' hold-up?
383
00:14:45,944 --> 00:14:48,404
I've got an entire planet
waiting on delivery!
384
00:14:48,405 --> 00:14:49,780
They say they're
out of spaghetti!
385
00:14:49,781 --> 00:14:52,617
Then let's go down
there and make some!
386
00:14:52,618 --> 00:14:55,578
[ Screaming ]
387
00:14:55,579 --> 00:15:03,294
- Kill yourself.
- Kill yourself...
388
00:15:03,295 --> 00:15:04,670
Madame President: I understand.
389
00:15:04,671 --> 00:15:06,756
Divert half of the armed
patrols to civil unrest,
390
00:15:06,757 --> 00:15:08,674
the other half to
planetary defense.
391
00:15:08,675 --> 00:15:11,427
Take every action
necessary to restore order.
392
00:15:11,428 --> 00:15:13,638
Still didn't hear much diverting
towards mental healthcare...
393
00:15:13,639 --> 00:15:14,972
The brainstorming is over,
394
00:15:14,973 --> 00:15:17,058
you ghoulish little
corpse-eating alien!
395
00:15:17,059 --> 00:15:18,267
You've helped enough!
396
00:15:18,268 --> 00:15:19,602
Fuck!
397
00:15:19,603 --> 00:15:21,771
We owe so much
spaghetti to so many planets
398
00:15:21,772 --> 00:15:23,564
that we're all going to
have to kill ourselves.
399
00:15:23,565 --> 00:15:25,024
Slow down, slow down.
400
00:15:25,025 --> 00:15:27,401
Rick can synthesize
anything he gets a sample of.
401
00:15:27,402 --> 00:15:29,111
Can't we still try that?
402
00:15:29,112 --> 00:15:31,614
I mean, is there
anyone else left
403
00:15:31,615 --> 00:15:33,324
who might wanna kill themselves?
404
00:15:33,325 --> 00:15:37,161
There's one, but good luck.
405
00:15:37,162 --> 00:15:38,746
Two months to live.
406
00:15:38,747 --> 00:15:40,665
Bedridden, terrible pain.
407
00:15:40,666 --> 00:15:43,000
Whoa. Why hasn't he done it yet?
408
00:15:43,001 --> 00:15:45,211
Hey! Fuck you, spaghetti child!
409
00:15:45,212 --> 00:15:46,420
What gives?!
410
00:15:46,421 --> 00:15:49,173
I'm in pain and I
wish I could die,
411
00:15:49,174 --> 00:15:52,385
but I won't feed your
sick system of profit.
412
00:15:52,386 --> 00:15:54,679
Integrity means
living with pain.
413
00:15:54,680 --> 00:15:59,475
What if I told you this would
end the spaghetti trade forever?
414
00:15:59,476 --> 00:16:02,020
What do you mean?
I'll explain on the way.
415
00:16:04,064 --> 00:16:05,941
[ Bottles clatter ]
416
00:16:09,236 --> 00:16:10,820
Did you have a, like a...
417
00:16:10,821 --> 00:16:13,030
euthanasia chamber ready to go?
418
00:16:13,031 --> 00:16:15,199
It's just a place.
419
00:16:15,200 --> 00:16:17,159
[ Screaming ]
420
00:16:17,160 --> 00:16:20,913
Hey! Hey! Everyone stop! Stop!
421
00:16:20,914 --> 00:16:22,957
I have a solution to
get you all spaghetti.
422
00:16:22,958 --> 00:16:25,418
We're gonna do
this one last time.
423
00:16:25,419 --> 00:16:27,378
This guy here, he's
gonna do the deed,
424
00:16:27,379 --> 00:16:28,879
and I-I'll synthesize it.
425
00:16:28,880 --> 00:16:31,090
This is the Kitty Hawk of
our Wright Brothers flight,
426
00:16:31,091 --> 00:16:34,719
or the fill-in-the-blank
from your fill-in-the-planet.
427
00:16:34,720 --> 00:16:36,721
Now, Fred, just
think about your life.
428
00:16:36,722 --> 00:16:39,807
This machine will put it on
screen for everyone to see.
429
00:16:39,808 --> 00:16:42,769
When you're ready,
press the button.
430
00:16:44,563 --> 00:16:46,731
[ Door opens, closes ]
431
00:16:46,732 --> 00:16:48,649
D-Do you think
this is gonna work?
432
00:16:48,650 --> 00:16:49,734
Trust me.
433
00:16:49,735 --> 00:16:52,653
[ Groans ]
434
00:16:52,654 --> 00:16:56,407
[ Beeping ]
435
00:16:56,408 --> 00:17:04,408
♪
436
00:17:11,757 --> 00:17:14,175
♪ Maybe ♪
437
00:17:14,176 --> 00:17:16,844
♪ I don't really wanna know ♪
438
00:17:16,845 --> 00:17:19,722
♪ How your garden grows ♪
439
00:17:19,723 --> 00:17:23,059
♪ 'Cause I just wanna fly ♪
440
00:17:23,060 --> 00:17:25,102
♪ Lately ♪
441
00:17:25,103 --> 00:17:28,147
♪ Did you ever feel the pain ♪
442
00:17:28,148 --> 00:17:30,941
♪ In the morning rain ♪
443
00:17:30,942 --> 00:17:35,029
♪ As it soaks you to the bone? ♪
444
00:17:35,030 --> 00:17:37,865
♪ Maybe I just wanna fly ♪
445
00:17:37,866 --> 00:17:40,493
♪ Wanna live, I
don't wanna die ♪
446
00:17:40,494 --> 00:17:43,329
♪ Maybe I just wanna breathe ♪
447
00:17:43,330 --> 00:17:46,373
♪ Maybe I just don't believe ♪
448
00:17:46,374 --> 00:17:49,043
♪ Maybe you're the same as me ♪
449
00:17:49,044 --> 00:17:51,879
♪ We see things
they'll never see ♪
450
00:17:51,880 --> 00:17:59,178
♪ You and I are
gonna live forever ♪
451
00:17:59,179 --> 00:18:01,931
♪ I said maybe ♪
452
00:18:01,932 --> 00:18:04,892
♪ I don't really wanna know ♪
453
00:18:04,893 --> 00:18:07,770
♪ How your garden grows ♪
454
00:18:07,771 --> 00:18:10,981
♪ 'Cause I just wanna fly ♪
455
00:18:10,982 --> 00:18:13,150
♪ Lately ♪
456
00:18:13,151 --> 00:18:16,153
♪ Did you ever feel the pain ♪
457
00:18:16,154 --> 00:18:18,781
♪ In the morning rain ♪
458
00:18:18,782 --> 00:18:23,119
♪ As it soaks you to the bone? ♪
459
00:18:23,120 --> 00:18:25,871
♪ Maybe I will never be ♪
460
00:18:25,872 --> 00:18:28,541
♪ All the things
that I wanna be ♪
461
00:18:28,542 --> 00:18:31,544
♪ Now is not the time to cry ♪
462
00:18:31,545 --> 00:18:34,255
♪ Now's the time
to find out why ♪
463
00:18:34,256 --> 00:18:36,966
♪ I think you're
the same as me ♪
464
00:18:36,967 --> 00:18:39,927
♪ We see things
they'll never see ♪
465
00:18:39,928 --> 00:18:45,182
♪ You and I are
gonna live forever ♪
466
00:18:45,183 --> 00:18:47,685
♪
467
00:18:47,686 --> 00:18:49,812
♪ Maybe ♪
468
00:18:49,813 --> 00:18:52,982
♪ I don't really wanna know ♪
469
00:18:52,983 --> 00:18:55,693
♪ How your garden grows ♪
470
00:18:55,694 --> 00:18:59,029
♪ 'Cause I just wanna fly ♪
471
00:18:59,030 --> 00:19:00,698
♪ Lately ♪
472
00:19:00,699 --> 00:19:04,285
♪ Did you ever feel the pain ♪
473
00:19:04,286 --> 00:19:06,871
♪ In the morning rain ♪
474
00:19:06,872 --> 00:19:11,041
♪ As it soaks you to the bone? ♪
475
00:19:11,042 --> 00:19:13,836
♪ Maybe I just wanna fly ♪
476
00:19:13,837 --> 00:19:16,505
♪ Wanna live, I
don't wanna die ♪
477
00:19:16,506 --> 00:19:19,341
♪ Maybe I just wanna breathe ♪
478
00:19:19,342 --> 00:19:22,219
♪ Maybe I just don't believe ♪
479
00:19:22,220 --> 00:19:25,055
♪ Maybe you're the same as me ♪
480
00:19:25,056 --> 00:19:27,808
♪ We see things
they'll never see ♪
481
00:19:27,809 --> 00:19:34,732
♪ You and I are
gonna live forever ♪
482
00:19:34,733 --> 00:19:38,861
♪ Gonna live forever ♪
483
00:19:38,862 --> 00:19:40,905
[ Beeping ]
484
00:19:40,906 --> 00:19:45,576
[ Groans softly ]
485
00:19:45,577 --> 00:19:48,622
[ Flatline ]
486
00:19:53,335 --> 00:19:54,419
[ Flatline stops ]
487
00:20:01,468 --> 00:20:02,593
Bon appétit.
488
00:20:02,594 --> 00:20:05,013
[ Gags ]
489
00:20:06,181 --> 00:20:08,016
[ All vomiting ]
490
00:20:12,729 --> 00:20:15,814
Well, fuck.
491
00:20:15,815 --> 00:20:18,734
I think I can speak on
behalf of my people...
492
00:20:18,735 --> 00:20:20,653
We've had enough spaghetti.
493
00:20:20,654 --> 00:20:22,238
You did it, didn't you?
494
00:20:22,239 --> 00:20:24,156
You couldn't change
everyone's taste buds
495
00:20:24,157 --> 00:20:26,116
but you could make it...
496
00:20:26,117 --> 00:20:27,618
distasteful.
497
00:20:27,619 --> 00:20:28,869
It wasn't the death, was it?
498
00:20:28,870 --> 00:20:30,496
It was the complexity of life.
499
00:20:30,497 --> 00:20:31,789
God, what was the point?
500
00:20:31,790 --> 00:20:33,165
If you're asking
whether this was a story
501
00:20:33,166 --> 00:20:35,918
about right and
wrong, the answer is
502
00:20:35,919 --> 00:20:37,127
I don't care.
503
00:20:37,128 --> 00:20:39,421
So what do we do?
Cells consume, Morty.
504
00:20:39,422 --> 00:20:42,049
Life itself is wrong, and
that means death is right.
505
00:20:42,050 --> 00:20:43,384
But you can't side with that.
506
00:20:43,385 --> 00:20:46,595
So you live, even
when it means eating.
507
00:20:46,596 --> 00:20:49,473
And Fred here
really did it well.
508
00:20:49,474 --> 00:20:50,933
Mmm, mmm.
509
00:20:50,934 --> 00:20:52,644
[ Sighs ]
510
00:20:54,980 --> 00:20:57,398
The hell is this?
Where is the spaghetti?
511
00:20:57,399 --> 00:20:58,816
Why don't you go
fuck yourself, Summer?
512
00:20:58,817 --> 00:21:00,693
What? What's wrong
with Salisbury steaks?
513
00:21:00,694 --> 00:21:03,821
At least try them.
Holy shit, this is...
514
00:21:03,822 --> 00:21:06,699
the best Salisbury
steak I've ever had.
515
00:21:06,700 --> 00:21:09,493
Mmm! Is it actually
Salisbury steak?
516
00:21:09,494 --> 00:21:10,911
Do you want to know or not?
517
00:21:10,912 --> 00:21:12,413
Together: No, thanks!
518
00:21:12,414 --> 00:21:14,873
Just so you know,
it's really bad.
519
00:21:14,874 --> 00:21:16,125
Whatever you say!
520
00:21:16,126 --> 00:21:17,876
Seriously, haha,
I'm not kidding.
521
00:21:17,877 --> 00:21:20,212
I won't tell you but I need
you to know the truth is horrible
522
00:21:20,213 --> 00:21:23,173
so that if you ever find out on
accident, you can't blame me!
523
00:21:23,174 --> 00:21:25,050
Now that's a deal! Yeah!
524
00:21:25,051 --> 00:21:26,844
Honestly, if you knew,
you might kill yourselves.
525
00:21:26,845 --> 00:21:28,012
That's the last
thing I'll say forever.
526
00:21:28,013 --> 00:21:31,181
Good! [ Laughter ]
527
00:21:31,182 --> 00:21:39,182
♪
528
00:22:08,136 --> 00:22:11,263
♪ Gonna live forever ♪
529
00:22:11,264 --> 00:22:16,435
[ Flatline ]
530
00:22:16,436 --> 00:22:20,022
That's where vacuum cleaner bags
come from?!
531
00:22:20,023 --> 00:22:21,565
Oh, my God.
532
00:22:21,566 --> 00:22:23,484
Vrrrrrr!
533
00:22:23,485 --> 00:22:24,902
Vrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!
534
00:22:24,903 --> 00:22:27,280
Hgggggg-vvrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!
535
00:22:28,740 --> 00:22:30,241
Did you get any of that?
536
00:22:30,265 --> 00:22:32,265
>>>>oakislandtk<<<<<
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