1
00:01:58,950 --> 00:02:02,120
I'm so... alone.

2
00:02:30,773 --> 00:02:32,108
The girl of my dreams?

3
00:02:34,485 --> 00:02:36,112
It's time to wake up, dude.

4
00:02:41,618 --> 00:02:43,620
I had a dream about that girl again.

5
00:02:45,580 --> 00:02:47,790
I didn't care the first time you told me.

6
00:02:47,874 --> 00:02:49,209
I care even less now.

7
00:02:54,047 --> 00:02:58,092
{n8}<i>But she has cool hair and wheels.</i>

8
00:02:58,176 --> 00:02:59,802
Wow! So specific.

9
00:02:59,886 --> 00:03:02,430
- When are you getting your own place?
- Isn't this my place?

10
00:03:03,348 --> 00:03:06,643
No, I let you crash here one time,
and you never left.

11
00:03:06,726 --> 00:03:08,311
That's not how I remember it.

12
00:03:08,937 --> 00:03:10,855
Could you at least get your own stuff?

13
00:03:11,898 --> 00:03:13,483
I have stuff.

14
00:03:15,235 --> 00:03:17,570
You do not have stuff.

15
00:03:20,114 --> 00:03:21,114
Can I have some?

16
00:03:21,157 --> 00:03:23,326
Some of <i>my</i> coffee?

17
00:03:23,826 --> 00:03:26,079
I don't have to take this guff from you.

18
00:03:26,162 --> 00:03:28,915
You're right. You don't. So leave.

19
00:03:32,418 --> 00:03:34,045
I was just about to anyway.

20
00:03:40,468 --> 00:03:43,554
<i>Toronto, Canada. Not too long ago.</i>

21
00:03:53,773 --> 00:03:55,692
We are Sex Bob-omb!

22
00:03:55,775 --> 00:03:57,193
{n8}One! Two! Three! Four!

23
00:03:58,152 --> 00:03:59,946
<i>Hey! Hey!</i>

24
00:04:03,074 --> 00:04:04,826
<i>Hey! Hey!</i>

25
00:04:07,912 --> 00:04:12,041
{n8}<i>Can't find my way around</i>

26
00:04:12,917 --> 00:04:16,921
<i>When the sun comes up, I'm down</i>

27
00:04:17,922 --> 00:04:19,924
<i>Hey! Hey!</i>

28
00:04:21,134 --> 00:04:22,134
<i>I feel fine!</i>

29
00:04:23,469 --> 00:04:25,096
<i>Hey! Hey!</i>

30
00:04:26,139 --> 00:04:28,141
{n8}<i>- I don't feel good
- I feel fine!</i>

31
00:04:38,609 --> 00:04:40,278
<i>Hey! Hey!</i>

32
00:04:41,154 --> 00:04:42,447
<i>I feel fine!</i>

33
00:04:43,489 --> 00:04:45,450
<i>Hey! Hey!</i>

34
00:04:46,284 --> 00:04:47,952
<i>- I don't feel good!
- I feel fine!</i>

35
00:04:52,707 --> 00:04:58,296
Wow! You might be
the best band of all time.

36
00:04:58,379 --> 00:04:59,380
We're not.

37
00:04:59,464 --> 00:05:03,551
Maybe Knives has really good taste
and knows things others don't.

38
00:05:03,634 --> 00:05:04,927
Wouldn't count on it.

39
00:05:06,095 --> 00:05:07,096
Want to do it again?

40
00:05:07,180 --> 00:05:08,556
Let's do it again!

41
00:05:10,099 --> 00:05:11,809
<i>Hey! Hey!</i>

42
00:05:25,073 --> 00:05:27,742
Why aren't you bringing
your new girlfriend to Julie's party?

43
00:05:27,825 --> 00:05:29,744
She's not really my girlfriend.

44
00:05:29,827 --> 00:05:31,412
Then what is she?

45
00:05:31,496 --> 00:05:34,707
She's sort of my girlfriend.

46
00:05:34,791 --> 00:05:37,293
Scott, your life is so interesting.

47
00:05:38,211 --> 00:05:39,295
Thanks, Kim.

48
00:05:39,379 --> 00:05:42,256
Oh, that was sarcasm.

49
00:05:46,344 --> 00:05:48,471
All right, you guys want to... What?

50
00:06:36,811 --> 00:06:37,811
Hey.

51
00:06:38,604 --> 00:06:39,604
Hi.

52
00:06:43,025 --> 00:06:44,735
You know Sonic the Hedgehog?

53
00:06:46,571 --> 00:06:48,489
You probably know this,
but in the early 90s,

54
00:06:48,573 --> 00:06:52,160
there were two different Sonic cartoons
airing at the same time.

55
00:06:52,243 --> 00:06:53,786
One was dark and dramatic.

56
00:06:53,870 --> 00:06:56,456
The other was a hilarious comedy
about chili dogs.

57
00:06:56,539 --> 00:06:59,667
And the same guy played Sonic
in both shows.

58
00:06:59,750 --> 00:07:00,751
Isn't that wild?

59
00:07:00,835 --> 00:07:03,921
The same guy playing
two different versions of the same guy?

60
00:07:05,548 --> 00:07:10,094
Maybe you didn't watch cartoons,
or you're not into chili dogs.

61
00:07:11,554 --> 00:07:12,554
They're okay.

62
00:07:13,473 --> 00:07:15,892
I mostly watched older stuff
when I was a kid.

63
00:07:15,975 --> 00:07:17,643
You know, <i>Columbo</i> reruns.

64
00:07:17,727 --> 00:07:20,104
Reruns. Cool, got it.

65
00:07:21,481 --> 00:07:22,607
Are you real?

66
00:07:23,191 --> 00:07:25,109
Did you just ask me if I was real?

67
00:07:25,193 --> 00:07:28,196
No, I was talking to someone else. Bye!

68
00:07:38,623 --> 00:07:39,832
Why are you here?

69
00:07:39,916 --> 00:07:41,042
I'm a plus-one.

70
00:07:41,125 --> 00:07:42,960
{n8}There were no plus-ones.

71
00:07:43,044 --> 00:07:45,755
{n8}Everyone here is someone
I invited personally.

72
00:07:45,838 --> 00:07:47,590
{n8}My parties are curated.

73
00:07:48,841 --> 00:07:52,386
{n8}So, do you know
this one girl with hair like this?

74
00:07:54,055 --> 00:07:55,806
Ramona Flowers?

75
00:07:56,390 --> 00:07:57,517
Ramona.

76
00:07:58,017 --> 00:08:00,019
- She's from New York City.
- The Big Apple.

77
00:08:00,102 --> 00:08:01,854
She moved here after a bad breakup.

78
00:08:01,938 --> 00:08:02,980
She's single.

79
00:08:03,064 --> 00:08:05,316
Got a job delivering DVDs for Netflix.

80
00:08:05,399 --> 00:08:06,859
DVDs for Netflix.

81
00:08:06,943 --> 00:08:09,946
- I'm like her only friend in town.
- She needs friends.

82
00:08:10,029 --> 00:08:12,448
I forbid you from dating her,
Scott Pilgrim!

83
00:08:13,074 --> 00:08:14,575
Cool. Thanks, Julie. Bye.

84
00:08:20,540 --> 00:08:22,917
Wallace, quick! What movie should I rent?

85
00:08:23,000 --> 00:08:24,669
You're banned from No-Account Video.

86
00:08:24,752 --> 00:08:27,672
You owe, like,
a gajillion dollars in late fees.

87
00:08:27,755 --> 00:08:31,425
Not the rental place.
I'm using the World Wide Web.

88
00:08:31,509 --> 00:08:32,635
What should I rent?

89
00:08:34,136 --> 00:08:36,472
Something starring a hot guy.

90
00:08:40,601 --> 00:08:42,562
I think I need the name of a hot guy.

91
00:08:43,271 --> 00:08:44,271
Fine.

92
00:08:45,064 --> 00:08:46,148
Lucas Lee.

93
00:08:46,232 --> 00:08:47,942
Best chest in the business.

94
00:08:48,025 --> 00:08:50,611
<i>Action Doctor,
Let's Hope There's A Heaven,</i>

95
00:08:50,695 --> 00:08:51,695
<i>Thrilled To Be Here.</i>

96
00:08:51,737 --> 00:08:55,866
<i>The Game Is Over 2!</i>
It's over a second time! That sounds fun.

97
00:08:58,786 --> 00:09:00,496
Are you waiting for the DVD?

98
00:09:01,247 --> 00:09:02,456
It's gonna take a bit.

99
00:09:02,957 --> 00:09:04,166
How long could it take?

100
00:09:20,766 --> 00:09:21,766
Sonic guy?

101
00:09:22,685 --> 00:09:24,395
Yes, that's me.

102
00:09:24,979 --> 00:09:27,523
Are you "Wallace Wells"?

103
00:09:28,024 --> 00:09:30,985
No, I'm Scott. Scott Pilgrim.

104
00:09:31,068 --> 00:09:32,903
Wallace is my cool, gay roommate.

105
00:09:32,987 --> 00:09:34,614
He lets me use his credit card.

106
00:09:34,697 --> 00:09:35,740
Oh.

107
00:09:35,823 --> 00:09:38,117
So like a sugar daddy situation?

108
00:09:39,785 --> 00:09:40,785
Sugar what?

109
00:09:42,538 --> 00:09:44,957
Cool. Enjoy your DVD, Mr. Wells.

110
00:09:47,084 --> 00:09:48,669
- Wait.
- Hmm?

111
00:09:49,295 --> 00:09:51,380
Are you the person in my dreams?

112
00:09:51,881 --> 00:09:53,674
I thought we went over this already.

113
00:09:53,758 --> 00:09:55,801
So, you are? Isn't that weird?

114
00:09:55,885 --> 00:09:57,219
It's not weird at all.

115
00:09:59,930 --> 00:10:03,351
There's just a convenient subspace highway
running through your head.

116
00:10:03,893 --> 00:10:06,062
<i>It's like three miles in 15 seconds.</i>

117
00:10:07,271 --> 00:10:10,149
I don't know what that is in kilometers.

118
00:10:10,941 --> 00:10:13,444
Space subways. Totally. I get it.

119
00:10:13,527 --> 00:10:15,237
Anyway, want to go out sometime?

120
00:10:16,364 --> 00:10:18,949
You want to go on a date? With me?

121
00:10:19,033 --> 00:10:22,078
Doesn't have to be a date.
It could be a low-key team-up.

122
00:10:22,161 --> 00:10:25,289
Canada and America joining forces?

123
00:10:25,373 --> 00:10:29,043
You're new in town. I'm old in town.
What do you think?

124
00:10:35,549 --> 00:10:37,218
Why are you just standing there?

125
00:10:37,718 --> 00:10:39,553
Dude, I'm waiting on you.

126
00:10:42,598 --> 00:10:45,810
It's getting nice out, eh?
I didn't really need the parka.

127
00:10:46,477 --> 00:10:48,104
What's with the "X" anyway?

128
00:10:48,813 --> 00:10:49,939
Oh, this?

129
00:10:50,731 --> 00:10:53,818
Well, obviously, one of us
went to Professor Xavier's school

130
00:10:53,901 --> 00:10:56,362
for gifted youngsters,
and one of us did not.

131
00:10:57,196 --> 00:10:58,572
Is that a Sonic thing?

132
00:10:59,281 --> 00:11:01,325
Is it Sonic?

133
00:11:01,409 --> 00:11:03,285
No, it isn't.

134
00:11:04,328 --> 00:11:06,122
So, why'd you move to Toronto?

135
00:11:06,622 --> 00:11:09,083
Just so you could go to Julie's parties?

136
00:11:09,792 --> 00:11:10,792
No.

137
00:11:11,168 --> 00:11:13,462
Well, I got the job
delivering DVDs for Netflix,

138
00:11:13,546 --> 00:11:17,174
and Gideon always said Toronto
is one of the great cities. So...

139
00:11:18,217 --> 00:11:19,385
Is Gideon a boyfriend?

140
00:11:19,969 --> 00:11:21,887
He's a friend.

141
00:11:23,431 --> 00:11:24,932
So, what do you do?

142
00:11:25,891 --> 00:11:27,143
I'm between jobs.

143
00:11:28,811 --> 00:11:30,312
Between what and what?

144
00:11:30,396 --> 00:11:34,024
Well, my last job is
a really long story filled with sighs.

145
00:11:35,192 --> 00:11:37,528
Maybe we can get into it
in a later episode.

146
00:11:37,611 --> 00:11:41,741
We don't have to talk about our pasts.
It's my least favorite subject.

147
00:11:44,034 --> 00:11:47,288
I should have checked the weather.
Guess you need that parka now.

148
00:11:48,414 --> 00:11:52,168
It's just a little bit of snow.
Did it snow where you came from?

149
00:11:52,668 --> 00:11:55,087
I thought we were avoiding the past.

150
00:11:55,171 --> 00:11:58,048
Where you're from?
That's not the past. That's a location.

151
00:11:59,759 --> 00:12:00,885
Fine.

152
00:12:00,968 --> 00:12:02,219
Where are you from?

153
00:12:03,095 --> 00:12:04,095
Up north.

154
00:12:06,223 --> 00:12:08,392
Then you're used to
this kind of weather, right?

155
00:12:09,685 --> 00:12:11,562
Yeah. Are you?

156
00:12:12,480 --> 00:12:14,106
I grew up in the mountains, man.

157
00:12:14,607 --> 00:12:16,192
Did you do a lot of skiing?

158
00:12:16,275 --> 00:12:17,860
No, not really.

159
00:12:17,943 --> 00:12:18,943
Yeah.

160
00:12:28,120 --> 00:12:29,747
Bring me Matthew Patel.

161
00:12:30,915 --> 00:12:32,500
The game has begun.

162
00:12:33,834 --> 00:12:34,960
Do you ice skate?

163
00:12:35,628 --> 00:12:38,130
I assumed, considering you rollerblade.

164
00:12:38,756 --> 00:12:40,633
I did figure skating when I was four.

165
00:12:41,926 --> 00:12:42,926
Look at that.

166
00:12:43,719 --> 00:12:45,763
You got me talking about the past again.

167
00:12:45,846 --> 00:12:48,140
{n8}You're quite the trickster, Scott Pilgrim.

168
00:12:48,974 --> 00:12:50,518
And I wasn't even trying.

169
00:12:54,313 --> 00:12:55,940
This really picked up.

170
00:12:57,024 --> 00:12:59,193
Ramona, I can't see you!

171
00:12:59,276 --> 00:13:01,445
Relax. Take my hand.

172
00:13:03,531 --> 00:13:06,116
There should be a door around here.

173
00:13:13,541 --> 00:13:15,584
What?

174
00:13:20,422 --> 00:13:22,132
This is your apartment.

175
00:13:22,216 --> 00:13:24,802
So, that star door
was one of your space subways?

176
00:13:25,427 --> 00:13:26,971
Basically. Yeah.

177
00:13:27,054 --> 00:13:29,265
Good thing this wasn't a real date.

178
00:13:29,348 --> 00:13:32,059
Otherwise, it would qualify
as a major disaster.

179
00:13:34,436 --> 00:13:35,813
I'll make us some tea.

180
00:13:40,484 --> 00:13:42,027
You look like you're dying.

181
00:13:42,528 --> 00:13:43,904
Let me get you a blanket.

182
00:14:01,672 --> 00:14:03,340
Dude, I'm changing.

183
00:14:03,424 --> 00:14:06,635
Sorry. I'm just cold and innocent.

184
00:14:06,719 --> 00:14:09,597
There you go.
Now I can't see anything. That's better.

185
00:14:10,764 --> 00:14:12,016
Does this help?

186
00:14:12,600 --> 00:14:13,809
I'm cold too.

187
00:14:27,072 --> 00:14:29,116
- Sparks.
- Uh-huh.

188
00:14:30,784 --> 00:14:34,496
Were you just gonna bring
the blanket from your bed?

189
00:14:34,997 --> 00:14:35,997
I guess.

190
00:14:36,332 --> 00:14:41,003
Maybe we could both get under it
while it's on the bed

191
00:14:41,879 --> 00:14:44,924
since we're both... cold.

192
00:14:55,726 --> 00:14:57,770
I'm not sure if I'm ready.

193
00:15:00,439 --> 00:15:01,565
I changed my mind.

194
00:15:02,566 --> 00:15:04,944
From what to what?

195
00:15:05,027 --> 00:15:07,821
I don't wanna have sex with you, Pilgrim.
Not right now.

196
00:15:08,614 --> 00:15:10,491
That's okay. That's cool.

197
00:15:10,991 --> 00:15:14,078
I'm not gonna send you home
in a snowstorm, or anything.

198
00:15:14,161 --> 00:15:15,454
You can sleep in my bed.

199
00:15:16,038 --> 00:15:19,959
And I reserve the right to change
my mind about the sex later.

200
00:15:21,835 --> 00:15:22,835
Awesome.

201
00:15:30,511 --> 00:15:31,929
You sent for me?

202
00:15:32,513 --> 00:15:33,597
I did.

203
00:15:35,265 --> 00:15:37,726
I just wanted to say thanks
for creating this league.

204
00:15:37,810 --> 00:15:39,269
It's pretty high-concept.

205
00:15:39,353 --> 00:15:41,438
I didn't bring you here for flattery.

206
00:15:41,522 --> 00:15:43,357
Things have taken a turn.

207
00:15:44,066 --> 00:15:46,902
It seems our dear Ramona has a new suitor.

208
00:15:47,403 --> 00:15:49,154
It's really happening? Who is he?

209
00:15:49,238 --> 00:15:52,741
My interns compiled
extensive research on the subject.

210
00:15:53,534 --> 00:15:58,247
Scott Pilgrim, 23-years-old.
Lives in Toronto, Canada.

211
00:15:58,330 --> 00:15:59,707
Jobless, hopeless.

212
00:15:59,790 --> 00:16:02,501
He's in an indie band
of subjective quality.

213
00:16:02,584 --> 00:16:04,169
How long have they been dating?

214
00:16:04,712 --> 00:16:08,716
They've been on one date,
but he's currently sleeping in her bed.

215
00:16:08,799 --> 00:16:10,134
That bastard!

216
00:16:10,217 --> 00:16:13,804
Indeed.
But this is where it gets interesting.

217
00:16:14,680 --> 00:16:16,473
Scott Pilgrim is dating a high schooler.

218
00:16:16,557 --> 00:16:17,557
What?

219
00:16:18,267 --> 00:16:21,812
Wait, I'm sorry.
Did you say he's dating a high schooler?

220
00:16:21,895 --> 00:16:23,355
Dating may be a strong word.

221
00:16:23,439 --> 00:16:28,360
Our intel says they've never kissed,
but they did hold hands once.

222
00:16:29,903 --> 00:16:31,196
Does Ramona know?

223
00:16:32,072 --> 00:16:33,824
He hasn't told her yet.

224
00:16:33,907 --> 00:16:36,660
Wow! And I thought we were evil.

225
00:16:37,619 --> 00:16:38,996
What's his fight experience?

226
00:16:39,079 --> 00:16:43,625
He's been described as, quote,
"The best fighter in the province."

227
00:16:43,709 --> 00:16:44,709
Unquote.

228
00:16:45,544 --> 00:16:47,337
This scumbag sounds like a challenge.

229
00:16:47,421 --> 00:16:48,881
Are you worried?

230
00:16:48,964 --> 00:16:52,885
No, I'm glad it won't be easy.
I'll relish this victory.

231
00:16:52,968 --> 00:16:55,429
Ramona's new guy
is gonna wish he was never born

232
00:16:55,512 --> 00:16:57,931
because his brutal death is inevitable!

233
00:16:58,015 --> 00:16:59,016
Because of me.

234
00:16:59,725 --> 00:17:01,518
Because I'm gonna kill him.

235
00:17:01,602 --> 00:17:03,020
And then he'll be dead.

236
00:17:03,687 --> 00:17:09,818
I hope Scott Pilgrim enjoys the final few
days of his precious little life.

237
00:17:19,953 --> 00:17:21,330
What time is it?

238
00:17:21,914 --> 00:17:23,373
Not quite 8:00 a.m.

239
00:17:23,457 --> 00:17:26,710
I have to work, so you have to leave.

240
00:17:30,214 --> 00:17:33,217
Hey, can this not be a one-night stand?

241
00:17:33,300 --> 00:17:35,594
For one thing,
I'm not even sure if it would count.

242
00:17:37,638 --> 00:17:38,680
I'll consider it.

243
00:17:43,352 --> 00:17:44,603
What did you have in mind?

244
00:17:46,021 --> 00:17:49,983
Oh! My band has a show tonight.
At the Rockit, 9:00 p.m.

245
00:17:50,067 --> 00:17:51,652
You have a band?

246
00:17:52,152 --> 00:17:55,155
Yeah. We're terrible. Please come.

247
00:17:57,157 --> 00:18:00,869
Yeah, okay. 9:00 p.m.
The Rockit. I'll be there.

248
00:18:11,004 --> 00:18:13,298
I bet you're wondering
why I never came home last night.

249
00:18:13,382 --> 00:18:15,050
I did wonder how I got so lucky.

250
00:18:15,634 --> 00:18:17,636
Well, actually,
I am the one who got lucky,

251
00:18:17,719 --> 00:18:22,391
because I spent the night
with the girl of, or from, my dreams.

252
00:18:23,183 --> 00:18:24,560
Ramona Flowers.

253
00:18:24,643 --> 00:18:25,643
Congrats.

254
00:18:26,395 --> 00:18:29,398
You need to break up
with your fake high school girlfriend.

255
00:18:30,524 --> 00:18:31,900
Do I have to?

256
00:18:31,984 --> 00:18:34,486
I mean, are we really even dating?

257
00:18:34,570 --> 00:18:37,698
Knives thinks you are,
and Knives is an angel.

258
00:18:37,781 --> 00:18:39,700
You need to end it immediately.

259
00:18:40,284 --> 00:18:43,453
Fine, you're right. I'll do it.

260
00:18:44,830 --> 00:18:45,747
Good.

261
00:18:45,831 --> 00:18:47,833
By the way, there's a letter for you.

262
00:18:52,796 --> 00:18:55,674
"Dear Mr. Pilgrim,
my name is Matthew Patel."

263
00:18:56,300 --> 00:19:01,054
"I challenge you to a..." blah, blah, blah,
something about fighting...

264
00:19:02,639 --> 00:19:04,641
"League of Evil Exes..."

265
00:19:06,059 --> 00:19:08,478
More like a League of boring.

266
00:19:09,438 --> 00:19:12,608
- You coming to our show tonight?
- Unfortunately, yes.

267
00:19:23,869 --> 00:19:25,495
Hey, Knives.

268
00:19:25,579 --> 00:19:27,122
Have you met Stacey?

269
00:19:28,040 --> 00:19:31,084
{n8}Wow! I've heard so much about you.

270
00:19:31,835 --> 00:19:33,086
{n8}So, how goes it?

271
00:19:33,170 --> 00:19:36,840
I am 16 kinds of pumped
to see Sex Bob-omb tonight.

272
00:19:36,924 --> 00:19:38,300
That's how it goes!

273
00:19:38,884 --> 00:19:41,887
I feel so excited
I might actually pass out!

274
00:19:44,097 --> 00:19:47,976
Boy, it sure seems like nobody delivered
crushing news to you today.

275
00:19:48,060 --> 00:19:51,772
Crushing? Like, a bad kind of crushing?

276
00:19:51,855 --> 00:19:53,774
Oh, you poor thing!

277
00:19:53,857 --> 00:19:55,984
You're better than him.
Just know that. Okay?

278
00:19:56,068 --> 00:19:57,069
Better than who?

279
00:19:59,696 --> 00:20:00,696
Scott!

280
00:20:07,663 --> 00:20:10,082
I have to go.

281
00:20:11,375 --> 00:20:12,584
Huh?

282
00:20:17,297 --> 00:20:18,966
Why are you stressing, Scott?

283
00:20:19,549 --> 00:20:21,969
Who's stressing? Stephen's stressing.

284
00:20:22,052 --> 00:20:24,721
Of course I'm stressing.
The opening band pulled out.

285
00:20:24,805 --> 00:20:25,847
They flaked!

286
00:20:25,931 --> 00:20:28,183
Crash and the Boys flaked?

287
00:20:28,934 --> 00:20:32,521
I heard they were changing it
to just "Crash" and losing the "Boys."

288
00:20:33,146 --> 00:20:34,648
You can't call a band "Crash."

289
00:20:34,731 --> 00:20:38,235
<i>Crash</i> is a cult classic car crash sex film
shot right here in Toronto.

290
00:20:38,318 --> 00:20:40,112
I didn't know you were a cinephile.

291
00:20:40,195 --> 00:20:41,488
What's a cinephile?

292
00:20:42,322 --> 00:20:43,448
Crash, Boys.

293
00:20:43,532 --> 00:20:46,827
Either way, they probably
canceled because they think we suck.

294
00:20:46,910 --> 00:20:48,120
We probably do.

295
00:20:48,912 --> 00:20:50,163
That's not funny, Kim.

296
00:20:50,247 --> 00:20:52,749
If we suck,
then the audience won't like us.

297
00:20:52,833 --> 00:20:53,959
They'll think we suck.

298
00:20:54,835 --> 00:20:57,170
- Maybe we should cancel the show.
- Hey.

299
00:20:57,254 --> 00:21:01,174
There's only one way to find out
if we suck, and that's by playing...

300
00:21:01,258 --> 00:21:02,258
now.

301
00:21:15,731 --> 00:21:18,233
So, are you a fan of Sex Bob-omb?

302
00:21:18,734 --> 00:21:21,528
No, I'm kind of
seeing someone in the band.

303
00:21:22,112 --> 00:21:24,865
That's crazy! I am too!

304
00:21:24,948 --> 00:21:26,283
Who are you dating in the band?

305
00:21:26,366 --> 00:21:28,410
We are Sex Bob-omb!

306
00:21:28,493 --> 00:21:30,162
One! Two! Three! Four!

307
00:21:30,245 --> 00:21:32,414
<i>In your orange shirt</i>

308
00:21:34,041 --> 00:21:35,876
<i>We'll go for yogurt</i>

309
00:21:37,461 --> 00:21:40,213
<i>Wish I could paint you
Whoa-oh-oh</i>

310
00:21:41,048 --> 00:21:43,550
<i>I'd never do you justice</i>

311
00:21:45,510 --> 00:21:46,845
<i>Oh yeah</i>

312
00:21:48,388 --> 00:21:50,140
<i>Oh yeah</i>

313
00:21:52,934 --> 00:21:55,937
<i>I only wanted to be near you</i>

314
00:21:56,021 --> 00:21:59,399
<i>I only wanted to be close to someone</i>

315
00:21:59,483 --> 00:22:02,778
<i>I only wanted to be next to you</i>

316
00:22:06,239 --> 00:22:07,657
Mr. Pilgrim.

317
00:22:17,042 --> 00:22:18,168
{n8}<i>Reversal!</i>

318
00:22:23,256 --> 00:22:24,800
Wait, hold on.

319
00:22:25,342 --> 00:22:27,677
Who are you exactly,
and why are we fighting?

320
00:22:28,845 --> 00:22:30,097
Aren't you Scott Pilgrim?

321
00:22:30,180 --> 00:22:31,556
Depends who's asking.

322
00:22:32,474 --> 00:22:33,600
It is I...

323
00:22:38,230 --> 00:22:42,150
Matthew Patel,
Ramona's first evil ex-boyfriend.

324
00:22:45,904 --> 00:22:48,532
Cool. And you're here because...?

325
00:22:48,615 --> 00:22:49,825
Didn't you read my letter?

326
00:22:50,659 --> 00:22:51,659
Kind of.

327
00:22:52,119 --> 00:22:54,704
I hand-delivered it during a blizzard.

328
00:22:55,580 --> 00:22:57,207
Remind me what it said, exactly.

329
00:22:59,376 --> 00:23:03,380
It said,
"Ramona Flowers has seven evil exes,

330
00:23:03,463 --> 00:23:05,715
each more powerful than the last."

331
00:23:05,799 --> 00:23:08,427
"All of whom you must defeat
in order to date her."

332
00:23:08,510 --> 00:23:09,845
<i>We're evil exes.</i>

333
00:23:09,928 --> 00:23:11,263
<i>We dated Ramona.</i>

334
00:23:11,346 --> 00:23:14,558
<i>- Evil.
- Evil.</i>

335
00:23:14,641 --> 00:23:16,518
It was a very detailed letter!

336
00:23:17,018 --> 00:23:18,018
You knew about this?

337
00:23:18,061 --> 00:23:21,314
Right, yeah, I heard about it.

338
00:23:21,398 --> 00:23:22,983
I sort of thought it was a joke?

339
00:23:23,066 --> 00:23:24,901
And you really dated this guy?

340
00:23:25,402 --> 00:23:27,571
Yeah. In middle school.

341
00:23:29,656 --> 00:23:31,825
<i>It was football season,
and for some reason,</i>

342
00:23:31,908 --> 00:23:33,368
<i>all the little jocks wanted me.</i>

343
00:23:33,952 --> 00:23:37,330
<i>Matthew Patel was the only
non-white, non-jock boy in school,</i>

344
00:23:37,831 --> 00:23:40,041
<i>maybe the only one for miles around.</i>

345
00:23:40,125 --> 00:23:43,670
<i>So, we joined forces and took 'em all out.</i>

346
00:23:44,171 --> 00:23:46,173
<i>Nothing could beat
Matthew's mystical powers</i>

347
00:23:46,256 --> 00:23:48,341
<i>combined with my brute strength.</i>

348
00:23:48,842 --> 00:23:53,138
We only kissed once, and we were quits
after something like a week and a half.

349
00:23:53,221 --> 00:23:55,223
He didn't even get truly evil
until high school,

350
00:23:55,307 --> 00:23:57,601
and by that time, he lived far, far away.

351
00:23:58,185 --> 00:23:59,769
Mystical powers?

352
00:23:59,853 --> 00:24:01,021
Unfair.

353
00:24:01,730 --> 00:24:03,982
All's fair in love and...

354
00:24:05,317 --> 00:24:07,986
War? I think it's war.

355
00:24:08,069 --> 00:24:09,404
Time to fight!

356
00:24:10,655 --> 00:24:13,241
{n8}<i>Matthew Patel versus Scott Pilgrim.</i>

357
00:24:13,325 --> 00:24:15,202
<i>Round one. Fight.</i>

358
00:24:44,898 --> 00:24:46,024
<i>KO?</i>

359
00:24:51,029 --> 00:24:53,031
I won?

360
00:24:54,533 --> 00:24:55,700
I won!