1 00:00:00,077 --> 00:00:03,080 ♪ 2 00:00:15,760 --> 00:00:17,428 I think we should change angles. 3 00:00:17,495 --> 00:00:18,696 Why? 4 00:00:18,763 --> 00:00:20,431 He looks like he's not even breathing. 5 00:00:20,498 --> 00:00:21,799 That's hockey players. 6 00:00:21,866 --> 00:00:23,567 Big personalities on the ice, but you can't pay them 7 00:00:23,634 --> 00:00:25,569 to have a shart of charisma away from it. 8 00:00:25,636 --> 00:00:27,004 This is so dumb. 9 00:00:27,071 --> 00:00:29,740 There you go. There is some life. 10 00:00:29,807 --> 00:00:32,043 Do you think that we should showcase the teeth? 11 00:00:32,109 --> 00:00:34,545 - That's uniquely hockey, right? - I don't know. 12 00:00:34,612 --> 00:00:37,214 - I think we should. - You think people would like that? 13 00:00:37,281 --> 00:00:40,284 Worst case, they feel bad for him and they say like, 14 00:00:40,351 --> 00:00:42,686 "OK, slugger, we'll come watch you play." 15 00:00:42,753 --> 00:00:45,089 Shoresy! Smile for a second. 16 00:00:47,024 --> 00:00:48,726 Take the dip out of your lip. 17 00:00:48,793 --> 00:00:51,495 - Me? - Holy fuck. 18 00:00:51,996 --> 00:00:53,664 - Go? Huh? - Shoresy. 19 00:00:53,731 --> 00:00:55,833 Is this the first time you've sat in a stool? 20 00:00:55,900 --> 00:00:57,735 - Ziig. - It isn't a stool, idiot. 21 00:00:57,802 --> 00:00:59,637 - Go. - Stools don't have back rests. 22 00:00:59,703 --> 00:01:01,138 Action! 23 00:01:01,739 --> 00:01:04,075 Are you and your family looking for something fun to do 24 00:01:04,141 --> 00:01:06,644 - on a Sudbury Saturday night? - Ziig! 25 00:01:06,710 --> 00:01:09,080 OK, do it again. 26 00:01:09,146 --> 00:01:12,016 Are you and your family looking for something fun to do 27 00:01:12,083 --> 00:01:14,718 on a Sudbury Saturday night? 28 00:01:14,785 --> 00:01:16,687 - Ziigwan! - Why are you saying 29 00:01:16,754 --> 00:01:18,589 - "and" like that? - Because on the card, 30 00:01:18,656 --> 00:01:20,157 you've got "and" written in bold. 31 00:01:20,224 --> 00:01:21,892 That's italics, you dumb fuck. 32 00:01:21,959 --> 00:01:24,328 Fuck you, Ziig, you fucking twat. 33 00:01:24,962 --> 00:01:27,765 - You alright, Sanguinet? - Leave him alone. 34 00:01:27,832 --> 00:01:29,733 He looks like he's in rigor mortis. 35 00:01:29,800 --> 00:01:31,402 Are you nervous or something? 36 00:01:31,469 --> 00:01:33,170 - A bit. - Sanger, you look like 37 00:01:33,237 --> 00:01:35,473 someone stuck a giant Popsicle stick to your spine 38 00:01:35,539 --> 00:01:37,942 - and is holding you up by it. - Fuck you, Shoresy. 39 00:01:38,008 --> 00:01:39,210 Well, he looks like an idiot. 40 00:01:39,276 --> 00:01:40,578 - Shut up. - It's like someone's 41 00:01:40,644 --> 00:01:41,745 holding him like a puppet. 42 00:01:41,812 --> 00:01:43,614 What's that called, a taxidermist? 43 00:01:43,681 --> 00:01:45,583 "Vantriloquist", you dunce. 44 00:01:45,649 --> 00:01:47,751 It's actually ven-triloquist. 45 00:01:47,818 --> 00:01:49,420 Uh-oh, Ziig, looks like your sister's 46 00:01:49,487 --> 00:01:50,821 better looking and smarter. 47 00:01:50,888 --> 00:01:52,723 Isn't it marionette? 48 00:01:53,324 --> 00:01:54,725 I have to pee. 49 00:01:54,792 --> 00:01:58,429 Are you and your family looking for something fun to do 50 00:01:58,496 --> 00:02:00,064 on a Sudbury Saturday night? 51 00:02:01,999 --> 00:02:03,701 The italics are fucking them up, Nat. 52 00:02:03,767 --> 00:02:05,436 - What're ya at, old man? - Hitch, you're such 53 00:02:05,503 --> 00:02:07,171 a fucking beauty, I sometimes forget 54 00:02:07,238 --> 00:02:09,773 what an odd-looking east coast cunt you are. 55 00:02:11,842 --> 00:02:14,712 Looks like he brushes his teeth with a brick, eh? 56 00:02:16,847 --> 00:02:19,216 - Cut! - Is it Saturday Sudbury night 57 00:02:19,283 --> 00:02:22,219 - or Sudbury Saturday night? - Cut! 58 00:02:22,286 --> 00:02:24,788 So now I don't say what's on the card? 59 00:02:24,855 --> 00:02:26,457 - No, just... - Huh? 60 00:02:26,524 --> 00:02:27,825 Just say what you want! 61 00:02:27,892 --> 00:02:30,594 - Yeah, so... - Don't swear! 62 00:02:31,128 --> 00:02:34,365 Yeah, so, we got a different team now. 63 00:02:34,965 --> 00:02:37,001 Like, even Sanger was on the last one, so. 64 00:02:37,067 --> 00:02:39,270 But now, he's coach and he's 1-0 so. 65 00:02:39,737 --> 00:02:43,474 So the Bulldogs aren't fu... rigging around anymore. 66 00:02:43,541 --> 00:02:44,909 The Bulldogs are gonna compete. 67 00:02:44,975 --> 00:02:49,313 So, if you wanna see the new Bulldogs then... 68 00:02:49,947 --> 00:02:52,016 get your bums in a seat. 69 00:02:54,485 --> 00:02:55,753 Cut. 70 00:03:38,262 --> 00:03:41,098 - I'm gonna put you on your ass! - For what? 71 00:03:41,165 --> 00:03:43,067 Do not let him ruin it this time, Laurence. 72 00:03:43,133 --> 00:03:45,603 - Well, sounds like you want your dance to suck then, eh Kayla? 73 00:03:45,669 --> 00:03:47,004 - Plant your feet, girl. - Huh? 74 00:03:47,071 --> 00:03:49,406 - Plant your feet, girl? - Tell your uncle what's up. 75 00:03:49,473 --> 00:03:50,975 - Stay here. - That's what's up. 76 00:03:51,041 --> 00:03:53,210 - Alright, well, I'll stay here. - Sounds like you don't want 77 00:03:53,277 --> 00:03:54,745 anyone watching your dance, that's fine. 78 00:03:54,812 --> 00:03:56,380 We didn't even get to do the whole thing because 79 00:03:56,447 --> 00:03:58,082 - you were trying to stunt. - Oh, I'm just saying, 80 00:03:58,148 --> 00:03:59,783 I heard some people saying they thought it lacked inclusion, 81 00:03:59,850 --> 00:04:01,685 - but whatever, it doesn't matter. - Fuck you, Waffle. 82 00:04:01,752 --> 00:04:04,121 - I'm just saying I heard some people saying they thought it lacked representation. 83 00:04:04,188 --> 00:04:06,423 So I just wanted to do something so she didn't get in trouble. 84 00:04:06,490 --> 00:04:07,691 - Doesn't matter. - Stay! 85 00:04:07,758 --> 00:04:09,226 - Yeah, I'll stay here. - But just so you know, 86 00:04:09,293 --> 00:04:11,228 Carrie got Facebooked by some people saying they heard 87 00:04:11,295 --> 00:04:13,597 Justin Timberlake was down here doing some moves or whatever, 88 00:04:13,664 --> 00:04:14,965 - but doesn't matter. - Fuck Facebook. 89 00:04:15,032 --> 00:04:16,900 - Fucking Twitter'd or whatever. - Twitter's a cult. 90 00:04:16,967 --> 00:04:18,636 Fucking Shawn Mendes or whatever. 91 00:04:18,702 --> 00:04:20,271 - I'm a Belieber! - He can skate. 92 00:04:20,337 --> 00:04:21,905 - Don't ruin it, Waffle. - Alright, well, 93 00:04:21,972 --> 00:04:23,907 just go get me a Puppers and it's a deal. 94 00:04:28,946 --> 00:04:32,016 Sup, Free? Hmm? 95 00:04:32,616 --> 00:04:34,685 Looking a little anxious over there for someone who smells 96 00:04:34,752 --> 00:04:36,987 - like a Bob Marley fan. - Kid, don't be a tic. 97 00:04:37,054 --> 00:04:39,156 Hey, Free, why don't you go smoke another joystick? 98 00:04:39,223 --> 00:04:40,991 Hey, Free, why don't we pick up 99 00:04:41,058 --> 00:04:42,960 - a 40 sack, smoke a session? - Waffle. 100 00:04:43,027 --> 00:04:45,262 Eh, Free? Wanna smoke a homegrown? Let's torch one. 101 00:04:45,329 --> 00:04:46,897 Get you feelin' all smoochy-woochy. 102 00:04:46,964 --> 00:04:49,300 Eh? Got some of that good Panatella Tommy Chong? 103 00:04:49,366 --> 00:04:52,569 Mm-hmm. Got some of that Maracachefa Manteca Mafafa? 104 00:04:53,504 --> 00:04:55,639 - Do your thing, pop. - Watch your mouth, Dad. 105 00:04:55,706 --> 00:04:57,908 - Wish me luck. - Hello, luck. 106 00:04:57,975 --> 00:05:01,245 Hey, Free, save me some of that swaggy. Nothing too stemmy. 107 00:05:02,613 --> 00:05:06,350 Well, thank you for coming to our annual family reunion. 108 00:05:09,887 --> 00:05:12,923 I appreciate all the highfalutin city bullshit 109 00:05:12,990 --> 00:05:14,525 you've managed to put aside. 110 00:05:14,591 --> 00:05:16,093 You know... 111 00:05:16,560 --> 00:05:20,531 These gatherings are important because they remind ya 112 00:05:20,597 --> 00:05:25,436 of where you came from and how proud you should be of where you are. 113 00:05:28,172 --> 00:05:31,608 My first foster child was the one they call Shoresy. 114 00:05:31,675 --> 00:05:35,479 - But the one you call... - Waffle. 115 00:05:36,647 --> 00:05:37,748 As you can see, 116 00:05:37,815 --> 00:05:39,183 he was full bars fat. 117 00:05:39,249 --> 00:05:43,220 Well, I was a little fatso myself at the time, right? 118 00:05:43,287 --> 00:05:45,322 Which is why I assumed 119 00:05:45,389 --> 00:05:46,824 they put him with me. 120 00:05:46,890 --> 00:05:51,061 We were a pair of chubsy butter-wubsys, huh? 121 00:05:51,128 --> 00:05:54,098 A couple of real ponchy-jumbos. 122 00:05:54,164 --> 00:05:57,835 Now, being fubsy was of no consequence to me down on the farm, 123 00:05:57,901 --> 00:05:59,837 but Shoresy was being teased at school 124 00:05:59,903 --> 00:06:01,638 for being a roly-poly. 125 00:06:01,705 --> 00:06:02,940 Well, what did they call ya? 126 00:06:03,006 --> 00:06:05,175 Plupy-Dumpers, Dumpy-chubbers, 127 00:06:05,242 --> 00:06:09,380 - Whale-Whopper, Salad Dodger... - Ha, full bars fat. 128 00:06:09,446 --> 00:06:14,518 And I could tell he was starting to not like himself very much. 129 00:06:15,986 --> 00:06:18,856 But then, Morris came. 130 00:06:18,922 --> 00:06:21,792 Big Mo! Big Mo! 131 00:06:21,859 --> 00:06:25,329 Now, when Morris arrived, Shoresy was eating a lot of waffles, 132 00:06:25,396 --> 00:06:28,365 which was the nickname Morris gave him. And it stuck. 133 00:06:28,432 --> 00:06:29,967 Waffle. 134 00:06:30,033 --> 00:06:31,568 He was as big as a house. 135 00:06:31,635 --> 00:06:34,138 I was as big as a fucking international house of pancakes. 136 00:06:34,204 --> 00:06:35,806 Every time you walked 137 00:06:35,873 --> 00:06:38,509 into a room, there he was with a mouthful. 138 00:06:38,575 --> 00:06:41,578 And a bead of sweat just dripping off his one chin. 139 00:06:41,645 --> 00:06:43,547 He was snacking eight, nine waffles for breakfast. 140 00:06:43,614 --> 00:06:45,949 - Well, there's eight to a pack. - I wouldn't crack open 141 00:06:46,016 --> 00:06:48,018 a whole new pack just for a ninth Eggo. 142 00:06:48,085 --> 00:06:49,286 I'd fucking add a bowl of cereal. 143 00:06:49,353 --> 00:06:51,555 He was all sorts of cinnamon-roly. 144 00:06:51,622 --> 00:06:54,324 He was freezing chocolate bars, crunching 'em up 145 00:06:54,391 --> 00:06:56,260 with a hammer, and sprinkling 'em on his waffles. 146 00:06:56,326 --> 00:06:58,228 OK, Waffle, you got a good idea there. 147 00:06:58,295 --> 00:07:00,130 I was nuking 'em for a bit there too. 148 00:07:00,197 --> 00:07:01,498 Well, his whole life was a sundae bar. 149 00:07:01,565 --> 00:07:04,201 Melting down Butterfingers in the microwave at noon. 150 00:07:04,268 --> 00:07:06,770 My whole plate looked like a fucking easter basket. 151 00:07:06,837 --> 00:07:09,673 But then Morris came. 152 00:07:09,740 --> 00:07:11,341 Big Mo! Big Mo! 153 00:07:11,408 --> 00:07:15,746 Now, Morris was an athlete with no one to play with. 154 00:07:15,813 --> 00:07:17,815 So, Shoresy was given the task. 155 00:07:17,881 --> 00:07:19,249 It was me and Waffle everywhere. 156 00:07:19,316 --> 00:07:20,984 Me and Waffle on the soccer field. 157 00:07:21,051 --> 00:07:23,020 Hey Waffle, you run like a girl! 158 00:07:23,086 --> 00:07:24,455 Me and Waffle at the ball park. 159 00:07:24,521 --> 00:07:26,290 Hey Waffle, you throw like a girl! 160 00:07:26,356 --> 00:07:28,091 Me and Waffle at the tennis court. 161 00:07:28,158 --> 00:07:31,228 - Hey Waffle, I'm gonna fuck... - ...Serena Williams! 162 00:07:31,295 --> 00:07:33,464 Day after day 163 00:07:33,530 --> 00:07:37,701 and game after game, Morris just pounded him into the ground. 164 00:07:37,768 --> 00:07:39,369 - Uh-huh. - Did he ever beat you, Dad? 165 00:07:39,436 --> 00:07:41,305 If you can't win, don't play, baby. 166 00:07:41,371 --> 00:07:44,908 Shoresy and Morris would compete from sun up to sun down. 167 00:07:44,975 --> 00:07:48,178 With Shoresy losing and losing and losing again. 168 00:07:48,245 --> 00:07:50,180 Which, of course, made him feel bad. 169 00:07:50,247 --> 00:07:53,250 He started to really hate it. But then, 170 00:07:53,317 --> 00:07:55,752 something clicked up there. 171 00:07:56,420 --> 00:07:58,222 He started to do something different. 172 00:07:58,288 --> 00:08:02,426 Shoresy started to play not just with Morris, but without Morris. 173 00:08:02,493 --> 00:08:06,396 And you know what happened? He started to get better. 174 00:08:06,463 --> 00:08:13,136 And before you knew it, one day, Shoresy beat Morris. 175 00:08:13,203 --> 00:08:14,838 Well, just the one time, 176 00:08:14,905 --> 00:08:17,307 - but he did beat him. - Give your balls a tug. 177 00:08:17,374 --> 00:08:20,110 He's been chasing that feeling ever since. 178 00:08:20,177 --> 00:08:22,613 And along the way, with all the work, 179 00:08:23,213 --> 00:08:25,816 the weight came off him. 180 00:08:26,450 --> 00:08:29,219 - I hate this story. - Don't be fat, and feel better. 181 00:08:29,286 --> 00:08:31,822 Yeah, let's figure out what makes you feel good. 182 00:08:31,889 --> 00:08:35,058 - Sometimes you need a little bit of tough love to get yourself sorted. 183 00:08:35,125 --> 00:08:36,994 Never going back again, baby. 184 00:08:37,060 --> 00:08:38,562 Crank it up, buddy, you're up next. 185 00:08:38,629 --> 00:08:40,531 Now, for all Waffle was fat, 186 00:08:40,597 --> 00:08:43,467 - Morris was dumb. - Big Mo! Big Mo! 187 00:08:43,534 --> 00:08:46,470 Fucking Mo was way dumber than I was fat. 188 00:08:46,537 --> 00:08:49,072 - You could barely run. - You could barely read. 189 00:08:49,139 --> 00:08:51,108 So there I am, straight out of the gate 190 00:08:51,174 --> 00:08:52,676 with a fat one and a dumb one. 191 00:08:52,743 --> 00:08:54,244 Mo, you honestly wanna say 192 00:08:54,311 --> 00:08:56,079 that I was as fat as you were dumb? 193 00:08:56,146 --> 00:08:57,514 What are you gonna do, Waffle? 194 00:08:57,581 --> 00:08:59,983 Mo, your social worker said two things to Dad. 195 00:09:00,050 --> 00:09:02,286 He said, "You OK with Blacks?" Dad says, "Yeah." 196 00:09:02,352 --> 00:09:04,054 He says, "Well, how about a dumb one?" 197 00:09:04,121 --> 00:09:05,188 Shut up, Waffle! 198 00:09:05,255 --> 00:09:07,457 No, that may have been said, Kayla. 199 00:09:07,524 --> 00:09:09,593 - Hand to heart, Kayla. - And as I'm wondering 200 00:09:09,660 --> 00:09:12,296 if this was all a big mistake, in walks Carrie. 201 00:09:12,362 --> 00:09:16,967 Care bear count down, four, three, two, one! 202 00:09:18,368 --> 00:09:20,938 Now, where Morris helped Waffle with being fat, 203 00:09:21,004 --> 00:09:23,140 Carrie helped Morris with being dumb. 204 00:09:23,206 --> 00:09:26,043 - Morris wasn't that dumb. - He just needed a good tutor. 205 00:09:26,109 --> 00:09:27,945 Hey Mo, what comes after a thousand? 206 00:09:28,478 --> 00:09:31,114 - Two thousand. - A thousand and one! 207 00:09:31,181 --> 00:09:32,482 Yeah, as a social worker, 208 00:09:32,549 --> 00:09:34,551 I can confidently say that Mo's social worker 209 00:09:34,618 --> 00:09:36,620 - wouldn't have called him dumb. - Well, actually, Care, 210 00:09:36,687 --> 00:09:39,256 it was dumb, and then later, real fucking dumb. 211 00:09:39,323 --> 00:09:41,058 You know, I think that was said. 212 00:09:41,124 --> 00:09:42,960 Well, real fucking dumb has a Tim Hortons 213 00:09:43,026 --> 00:09:45,862 franchise, bitch. Owner Operator. 214 00:09:45,929 --> 00:09:47,397 No way the social worker said dumb. 215 00:09:47,464 --> 00:09:48,832 You wanna know what your social worker 216 00:09:48,899 --> 00:09:51,301 said to Dad, Carrie? He said, "You OK with Asians?" 217 00:09:51,368 --> 00:09:53,837 Dad says, "Yeah." And she says, "Well, how about a gay one?" 218 00:09:53,904 --> 00:09:55,072 Fuck you, Waffle. 219 00:09:55,138 --> 00:09:58,208 - No, Free. - That was definitely said. 220 00:09:58,709 --> 00:10:01,411 - Something you wanna say, Free? - You don't want it, girl. 221 00:10:01,478 --> 00:10:03,547 - He don't want it. - Free! 222 00:10:03,614 --> 00:10:06,350 - Let's get into it, Waffle. - 'Cause you're gonna hear this. 223 00:10:06,416 --> 00:10:08,785 You're all gonna hear this. 224 00:10:10,387 --> 00:10:13,156 I know you all see our engagement rings. 225 00:10:13,223 --> 00:10:15,092 I know you're all talking. 226 00:10:15,158 --> 00:10:18,261 Those two girls can't be together, it ain't right. 227 00:10:19,496 --> 00:10:23,166 Well, guess what?! Carrie is not my sister. 228 00:10:23,233 --> 00:10:25,268 She's my foster sister, 229 00:10:25,335 --> 00:10:27,170 so it's completely fine that we're getting married. 230 00:10:27,237 --> 00:10:28,438 Sounds perfectly fine. 231 00:10:28,505 --> 00:10:29,873 And she was only my foster sister 232 00:10:29,940 --> 00:10:32,342 - for a year and a half. - Just keep saying you're sisters, 233 00:10:32,409 --> 00:10:34,611 Free, it's likely one of those "the more you hear it" things. 234 00:10:34,678 --> 00:10:37,280 - Dad! - You both call him Dad, Care! 235 00:10:37,347 --> 00:10:39,082 - I mean, it's like... - You were called sisters 236 00:10:39,149 --> 00:10:40,384 and brothers on the farm. 237 00:10:40,450 --> 00:10:42,486 Hey, Free, you know any brothers with sisters 238 00:10:42,552 --> 00:10:44,621 who fire digits up each other? 239 00:10:44,688 --> 00:10:46,023 But you're not blood. 240 00:10:46,089 --> 00:10:47,057 Right? 241 00:10:47,124 --> 00:10:49,926 So, I think it's perfectly fine 242 00:10:49,993 --> 00:10:51,728 for you to get married, Free. 243 00:10:51,795 --> 00:10:52,863 Thank you! 244 00:10:52,929 --> 00:10:54,331 But, you didn't seriously think 245 00:10:54,398 --> 00:10:56,667 we weren't gonna take the piss out of ya, did ya? 246 00:10:57,934 --> 00:10:59,036 You're worth it. 247 00:10:59,603 --> 00:11:02,472 Get a room you fucking sister wife! 248 00:11:07,511 --> 00:11:09,279 So there was no foster mom? 249 00:11:09,346 --> 00:11:11,248 - No, just the dad. - Huh. 250 00:11:11,314 --> 00:11:13,650 Hence the fascination for older women. 251 00:11:16,586 --> 00:11:18,255 You coming to the game tonight? 252 00:11:18,321 --> 00:11:20,390 - Laurence Leboeuf! - Laurence Leboeuf! 253 00:11:20,457 --> 00:11:22,759 - Laurence Leboeuf! - Bonjour! 254 00:11:22,826 --> 00:11:23,660 Salut! 255 00:11:23,727 --> 00:11:24,494 Remy Nadeau. 256 00:11:24,561 --> 00:11:25,996 Avec mon partenaire Benoit... 257 00:11:26,063 --> 00:11:28,331 - Benny! - Benoit Benny Brodeur. 258 00:11:28,398 --> 00:11:31,134 - Et moi, Remy Nadeau. - Laurence Leboeuf! 259 00:11:31,201 --> 00:11:32,836 Laurence Leboeuf! 260 00:11:36,106 --> 00:11:37,274 Yup. 261 00:11:38,742 --> 00:11:40,143 Ah. 262 00:11:40,210 --> 00:11:42,746 Remy Nadeau avec mon partenaire Benoit... 263 00:11:42,813 --> 00:11:43,847 Benny Coach! 264 00:11:43,914 --> 00:11:47,417 - Benoit Benny Brodeur. - We go everywhere JJ go. 265 00:11:47,484 --> 00:11:50,620 - I do the plays-by-play. - And I do the colours! 266 00:11:50,687 --> 00:11:52,756 Benoit Benny Brodeur do the colours. 267 00:11:52,823 --> 00:11:55,425 I, Remy Nadeau, do the plays-by-play. 268 00:11:55,492 --> 00:11:58,695 - Laurence Leboeuf. - Laurence Leboeuf. 269 00:12:03,266 --> 00:12:05,268 Lysandre Nadeau? 270 00:12:14,611 --> 00:12:16,913 - Lysandre Nadeau. - Remy Nadeau. 271 00:12:16,980 --> 00:12:19,349 All the Quebecois starlets, they love the JJ. 272 00:12:19,416 --> 00:12:21,351 All of Quebec love him, coach. 273 00:13:16,473 --> 00:13:20,744 - Oui, allo, Lysandre Nadeau. - Coucou. 274 00:13:58,048 --> 00:14:00,817 Oh my God, no way, Laura Mohr is the hottest girl 275 00:14:00,884 --> 00:14:04,254 in Sudbury, you fucking idiot. Oh my God. 276 00:14:04,321 --> 00:14:08,124 Oh, hey, Laura. Did you just hear that piece of shit? So dumb. 277 00:14:08,191 --> 00:14:10,827 Judging by the parking lot, a handful of people care now. 278 00:14:10,894 --> 00:14:12,229 Sudbury Saturday night. 279 00:14:12,295 --> 00:14:13,730 Cheapest drinks in the city too. 280 00:14:13,797 --> 00:14:16,466 When are you gonna let me take you out for some good Caribbean? 281 00:14:16,533 --> 00:14:18,768 - I don't date sluts. - My God are you good-looking. 282 00:14:18,835 --> 00:14:22,272 I know I may come off as a real devil-may-care kind of guy, 283 00:14:22,339 --> 00:14:23,673 but we both know you'd run my show. 284 00:14:23,740 --> 00:14:25,842 - Yeah? How so? - I'd take a header off 285 00:14:25,909 --> 00:14:28,144 the Bridge of Nations just to brush arms with ya. 286 00:14:28,211 --> 00:14:30,213 - Oh? - I'd full gainer down the crack 287 00:14:30,280 --> 00:14:32,015 in Kilarney just to hold your purse. 288 00:14:32,082 --> 00:14:33,750 - Mm. - I'd sit my bare ass 289 00:14:33,817 --> 00:14:36,920 on the big nickel just to have you flick some debris off my shirt, 290 00:14:36,987 --> 00:14:39,022 I swear to God, I'd be so good to ya. 291 00:14:39,089 --> 00:14:41,725 - Does North Bay's captain still have the biggest C in the league? 292 00:14:41,791 --> 00:14:43,894 It's the biggest fucking C in the world. 293 00:14:43,960 --> 00:14:45,629 See ya. 294 00:14:47,030 --> 00:14:48,465 Hey, when was the last time 295 00:14:48,531 --> 00:14:50,400 you had some good assorted tempura. 296 00:14:50,467 --> 00:14:52,369 Fuck you, Shoresy! 297 00:14:52,435 --> 00:14:54,004 For what?! 298 00:14:54,070 --> 00:14:55,505 - You guys win one... - Huh? 299 00:14:55,572 --> 00:14:57,474 You guys win one game and you think you can just 300 00:14:57,540 --> 00:14:59,442 cruise in five minutes before warm-up? 301 00:14:59,509 --> 00:15:00,877 - Yeah... - Huh? 302 00:15:00,944 --> 00:15:02,545 It's senior whale shit hockey, Ziig, 303 00:15:02,612 --> 00:15:04,547 it's not the fucking Knight's Watch. 304 00:15:04,614 --> 00:15:06,549 - Senior AAA. - Whale shit all the same. 305 00:15:06,616 --> 00:15:09,452 You're in half an hour before warm-up now, minimum. 306 00:15:09,519 --> 00:15:11,354 - For what?! - Ride the bike... 307 00:15:11,421 --> 00:15:12,656 Huh? 308 00:15:12,722 --> 00:15:14,624 - Ride the bike! - Nat, if I want a good laugh, 309 00:15:14,691 --> 00:15:17,060 - I'll watch Mr. Bean. - I'm serious. 310 00:15:17,127 --> 00:15:18,762 What bike?! 311 00:15:18,828 --> 00:15:20,530 Take your pick. 312 00:15:22,899 --> 00:15:24,734 Sponsors at the Blueberry Festival 313 00:15:24,801 --> 00:15:26,236 were so fired up about your win 314 00:15:26,303 --> 00:15:28,538 they decided to invest in another. 315 00:15:32,409 --> 00:15:34,911 - No one's gonna use this. - I know. 316 00:15:34,978 --> 00:15:36,980 Not one player will use this. 317 00:15:37,047 --> 00:15:39,049 - Good work, Blueberry Fest. - Like, the bikes, maybe. 318 00:15:39,115 --> 00:15:40,150 People love biking. 319 00:15:40,216 --> 00:15:41,351 Three bikes is excessive though. 320 00:15:41,418 --> 00:15:42,552 They think we've got three fucking 321 00:15:42,619 --> 00:15:44,487 Rod Brind'amours or what? 322 00:15:44,554 --> 00:15:45,822 - They were so fired... - Huh? 323 00:15:45,889 --> 00:15:47,424 They were so fired up when they wheeled 324 00:15:47,490 --> 00:15:49,225 - all this shit in. - Are you trying not to laugh? 325 00:15:49,292 --> 00:15:52,095 - I had to pretend to be fired up too because they were so fired up. 326 00:15:52,162 --> 00:15:54,064 Does it come with some fucking Gary Roberts tapes or what? 327 00:15:54,130 --> 00:15:56,533 I don't think they understand Senior "Whale Shit" Hockey. 328 00:15:56,599 --> 00:15:57,834 Senior AAA. 329 00:15:57,901 --> 00:15:59,336 Whale shit all the same. 330 00:15:59,402 --> 00:16:01,204 - Like, watch this. - Hey, Jims. 331 00:16:01,271 --> 00:16:02,906 - They work out, Jim? - Yeah. 332 00:16:02,973 --> 00:16:05,108 When was the last time you worked out, Jim? 333 00:16:05,175 --> 00:16:06,409 - 2012. - Jim? 334 00:16:06,476 --> 00:16:07,744 - Grade ten. - Jim? 335 00:16:07,811 --> 00:16:09,546 I'd have to think about that, Shoresy. 336 00:16:09,612 --> 00:16:10,981 I can't quite recall right now. 337 00:16:11,047 --> 00:16:13,316 The truth is, I never really enjoyed doing cardio. 338 00:16:13,383 --> 00:16:14,784 Thanks, Jims. 339 00:16:14,851 --> 00:16:16,586 I wanted to tell them most of these guys 340 00:16:16,653 --> 00:16:18,321 have families and jobs, they don't play Senior hockey 341 00:16:18,388 --> 00:16:19,789 to come to the rink and work out. 342 00:16:19,856 --> 00:16:22,459 - I bet the Soo work out. - The Soo are so fucking good. 343 00:16:22,525 --> 00:16:24,160 Seriously though, don't cut it so close. 344 00:16:24,227 --> 00:16:26,496 Get a good warm up in or you're gonna get hurt. 345 00:16:26,563 --> 00:16:27,897 - Tell the sluts. - You tell 'em. 346 00:16:27,964 --> 00:16:29,799 - They're not here. - Are they not here yet? 347 00:16:29,866 --> 00:16:31,668 - Shoresy, do you see... - Huh? 348 00:16:32,068 --> 00:16:33,570 Come with me. 349 00:16:34,838 --> 00:16:37,273 North Bay Norseman, baby. Gonna win? 350 00:16:37,340 --> 00:16:38,875 Well, if you can't win, don't play. 351 00:16:38,942 --> 00:16:41,378 - 'Cause if we lose. - We'll never lose again, Ziig. 352 00:16:41,444 --> 00:16:42,846 I hate playing these guys. 353 00:16:42,912 --> 00:16:44,681 Well, I fucking love playing these guys. 354 00:16:44,748 --> 00:16:46,516 Because they don't beat us as bad as the Soo? 355 00:16:46,583 --> 00:16:48,284 No, 'cause of the C on their captain's sweater. 356 00:16:48,351 --> 00:16:49,686 - Keller? - It's the biggest C you've 357 00:16:49,753 --> 00:16:51,688 ever seen in your life. Ziig, I can see you're real 358 00:16:51,755 --> 00:16:52,922 slammed here and everything, 359 00:16:52,989 --> 00:16:54,758 but is someone gonna call the boys or no? 360 00:16:54,824 --> 00:16:56,593 - I got us a new tendy. - From who? 361 00:16:56,659 --> 00:16:57,727 - No... - Huh? 362 00:16:57,794 --> 00:16:59,262 No one, he doesn't play anymore. 363 00:16:59,329 --> 00:17:01,464 Well, sounds way fucking dumber when you say it. 364 00:17:01,531 --> 00:17:03,066 - A little heads up... - Oh my God, 365 00:17:03,133 --> 00:17:04,167 is it this guy right here? 366 00:17:04,234 --> 00:17:05,935 Did you get him from fucking Cirque du Soleil? 367 00:17:06,002 --> 00:17:08,304 Cirque de Soleil, and no answer from Dolo. 368 00:17:08,371 --> 00:17:09,906 It's actually Cirque du Soleil, 369 00:17:09,973 --> 00:17:11,641 and no answer from Sanguinet either. 370 00:17:11,708 --> 00:17:13,777 - You know him. - No, I don't know either 371 00:17:13,843 --> 00:17:15,645 - of the Ringling Brothers. - And you're gonna be... 372 00:17:15,712 --> 00:17:18,214 Hey, bud, are you a fucking panhandler or something? 373 00:17:18,281 --> 00:17:19,949 Actually, you got a dip? 374 00:17:21,151 --> 00:17:22,385 Mark Michaels? 375 00:17:22,452 --> 00:17:23,787 Already, Nat? 376 00:17:23,853 --> 00:17:25,822 Our new tendy is fucking Mark Michaels? 377 00:17:25,889 --> 00:17:27,257 - You're go... - Huh?! 378 00:17:27,323 --> 00:17:29,793 - You're gonna be nice to him. - It starts already, Nat. 379 00:17:29,859 --> 00:17:32,796 We lose 20 on the campaign, you gas him, then we win one, 380 00:17:32,862 --> 00:17:34,431 and so, you bring him back? Huh? 381 00:17:34,497 --> 00:17:35,698 - See, I knew that... - Shut up! 382 00:17:35,765 --> 00:17:37,100 I knew this was a bad idea, Nat. 383 00:17:37,167 --> 00:17:39,235 - You shut up too. - Well, I knew it, Nat. 384 00:17:39,302 --> 00:17:40,570 She said shut up, slut. 385 00:17:40,637 --> 00:17:42,505 Why are you saying her name so much? 386 00:17:42,572 --> 00:17:43,673 - Do you see, Nat? - Michaels! 387 00:17:43,740 --> 00:17:45,208 He said your name like, 20 times. 388 00:17:45,275 --> 00:17:46,443 - Shut up. - So annoying. 389 00:17:46,509 --> 00:17:47,510 - Nat! - Oh my God! 390 00:17:47,577 --> 00:17:48,845 - Just shut up. - And you, shut up. 391 00:17:48,912 --> 00:17:50,814 - No answer from Hitch. - No answer from Goody. 392 00:17:50,880 --> 00:17:53,183 - Both of you, listen. - You're gonna apologize to him. 393 00:17:53,249 --> 00:17:54,551 - For what?! - For what? 394 00:17:54,617 --> 00:17:56,019 And you're gonna apologize to him. 395 00:17:56,086 --> 00:17:57,754 And then, you're not gonna talk to him anymore. 396 00:17:57,821 --> 00:17:59,289 I don't wanna talk to him fucking ever. 397 00:17:59,355 --> 00:18:01,024 Good, 'cause I don't wanna talk to him either. 398 00:18:01,091 --> 00:18:02,725 - Oh, give your balls a tug. - Shoresy! 399 00:18:02,792 --> 00:18:04,094 He should be apologizing to me. 400 00:18:04,160 --> 00:18:06,529 - What the... Excuse me! - Excuse me! 401 00:18:06,596 --> 00:18:07,697 For what? 402 00:18:07,764 --> 00:18:09,099 For being such a fucking loser. 403 00:18:09,165 --> 00:18:09,799 Know what? That's it. 404 00:18:09,866 --> 00:18:11,468 Fucking tit fucker. 405 00:18:11,534 --> 00:18:12,869 - I'm out. - Yeah, take your balls 406 00:18:12,936 --> 00:18:14,504 - with you, pheasant. - Shoresy, apologize or we fold! 407 00:18:14,571 --> 00:18:16,206 You can't just hold that over my head 408 00:18:16,272 --> 00:18:17,440 every time you need something. 409 00:18:17,507 --> 00:18:18,908 - Yes, I can. - Yes, she can. 410 00:18:18,975 --> 00:18:20,276 Yes, she can, but she shouldn't. 411 00:18:20,343 --> 00:18:22,378 We need him. Tendy quit. 412 00:18:22,445 --> 00:18:23,680 Tendy finally wins a game 413 00:18:23,746 --> 00:18:25,849 - and he fucking quits? - Oh, I wonder why! 414 00:18:25,915 --> 00:18:27,784 Well, at least there's a bigger loser than Michaels. 415 00:18:27,851 --> 00:18:29,285 He's not supposed to be talking to me, Nat! 416 00:18:29,352 --> 00:18:31,354 I wasn't talking to him, I was talking to you. 417 00:18:31,421 --> 00:18:33,656 Shoresy, he wants to win. 418 00:18:33,723 --> 00:18:36,226 - But he doesn't hate to lose. - Apologize! 419 00:18:37,327 --> 00:18:38,962 - Well, I'm sorry. - For what? 420 00:18:39,028 --> 00:18:41,664 - I don't know. - For the party island squeezer in Wasaga. 421 00:18:41,731 --> 00:18:43,032 I didn't get the squeezer from her! 422 00:18:43,099 --> 00:18:44,467 Sanguinet got the squeezer from her. 423 00:18:44,534 --> 00:18:45,835 Her brothers are super weird. 424 00:18:45,902 --> 00:18:48,238 But you were taking a fucking dump in the water! 425 00:18:48,304 --> 00:18:50,073 Everybody was taking a dump in the water! 426 00:18:50,140 --> 00:18:54,277 - It's fucking Wasaga! - Apologize or we fold. 427 00:18:56,813 --> 00:18:59,015 - Sorry, bud. - To him! 428 00:19:02,185 --> 00:19:04,854 - Sorry, bud. - Thank you. Apology accep... 429 00:19:04,921 --> 00:19:07,023 Is there seriously nothing back from the boys? 430 00:19:07,090 --> 00:19:08,892 - No! - Get your shit on. 431 00:19:08,958 --> 00:19:11,427 - You ready? - Of course. 432 00:19:11,494 --> 00:19:12,729 Why do you think they call me 433 00:19:12,795 --> 00:19:13,963 "Never misses the Mark Michaels"? 434 00:19:14,030 --> 00:19:16,099 That's so fucking embarrassing, Nat. 435 00:19:16,166 --> 00:19:18,501 That's fucking humiliating. How do you not chirp that? 436 00:19:18,568 --> 00:19:20,436 Look, we just made the rules right now, 437 00:19:20,503 --> 00:19:21,704 and look, he's talking to me, Nat! 438 00:19:21,771 --> 00:19:23,139 I'm talking to her! 439 00:19:24,207 --> 00:19:25,909 Fucking tit fucker. 440 00:19:40,089 --> 00:19:42,792 Hey, everything's bigger in North Bay, eh Keller? 441 00:19:42,859 --> 00:19:45,094 You fucking loser. Hey, Keller, when they put 442 00:19:45,161 --> 00:19:47,030 that big fuck off C on your sweater, 443 00:19:47,096 --> 00:19:48,998 did they think you'd grow into it or what? 444 00:19:50,200 --> 00:19:52,835 Like, were they pissed when you didn't, or what? 445 00:19:52,902 --> 00:19:54,804 Hey, Keller, you got any leadership tips? 446 00:19:54,871 --> 00:19:57,140 Just looking for some tips on being a leader. 447 00:19:57,207 --> 00:19:59,242 Jesus Christ, Keller, if they tried to put 448 00:19:59,309 --> 00:20:02,312 that big fuck off C on my sweater, I'd say, "No thanks." 449 00:20:02,378 --> 00:20:04,147 - Hey, Jim. - Yeah. 450 00:20:04,214 --> 00:20:05,648 - Jim? - Yes. 451 00:20:05,715 --> 00:20:07,183 - Jim? - Yeah, it's nice 452 00:20:07,250 --> 00:20:09,285 you're thinking of me, but I don't think it's a good idea. 453 00:20:09,352 --> 00:20:12,288 Making it bigger doesn't make it better, Keller. 454 00:20:13,623 --> 00:20:15,258 It's not tits. 455 00:20:15,325 --> 00:20:16,859 - Miig? - Nothing. 456 00:20:16,926 --> 00:20:18,428 - Ziig? - Still nothing. 457 00:20:18,494 --> 00:20:19,729 - You worried? - Wee bit. 458 00:20:19,796 --> 00:20:21,097 - Me too. - Bigger fish to fry, 459 00:20:21,164 --> 00:20:23,533 for a second. You said a quarter full? 460 00:20:23,600 --> 00:20:25,034 That is a thing I said. 461 00:20:25,101 --> 00:20:26,169 - You worried? - Wee bit. 462 00:20:26,236 --> 00:20:29,105 - Me too. - Only one way to find out. 463 00:20:29,872 --> 00:20:32,242 Bums in seats, baby, let's go. 464 00:20:37,180 --> 00:20:38,481 Bums in seats. 465 00:20:38,548 --> 00:20:40,717 Call it more like one-eighth full. 466 00:20:40,783 --> 00:20:42,952 Nat, what the fuck? 467 00:20:43,019 --> 00:20:46,456 Fuck you, what the fuck, Shoresy, where are the sluts? 468 00:20:46,522 --> 00:20:48,191 - Are they not here? - No... 469 00:20:48,258 --> 00:20:50,393 - Huh? Not even Sanger? Huh? - No! 470 00:20:53,630 --> 00:20:55,431 Do we have a chance without them? 471 00:20:57,333 --> 00:20:59,269 You fucking plug. 472 00:20:59,335 --> 00:21:01,137 So, what do we do? 473 00:21:04,774 --> 00:21:07,010 If you can't win, don't play. 474 00:21:09,245 --> 00:21:10,280 What?! 475 00:21:28,665 --> 00:21:30,900 - Laurence Leboeuf. - Laurence Leboeuf! 476 00:21:57,260 --> 00:21:59,762 So, what they do, try to wait 477 00:21:59,829 --> 00:22:01,564 till the other guy leave the ice, 478 00:22:01,631 --> 00:22:04,200 but Shoresy, Keller, not giving it up. 479 00:22:04,267 --> 00:22:06,035 It's a Stevie Wonder superstition. 480 00:22:18,581 --> 00:22:19,949 No, don't do that. 481 00:22:59,589 --> 00:23:02,024 Subtitling: difuze