1 00:01:05,947 --> 00:01:08,348 Greetings. Thank you. 2 00:01:13,518 --> 00:01:15,418 Thank you so much. 3 00:01:15,419 --> 00:01:18,755 Thank you, everybody. Thank you so much. 4 00:01:18,756 --> 00:01:20,690 Thank you, thank you. 5 00:01:20,691 --> 00:01:25,395 Welcome to The Grand Tour. And in this week's programme: 6 00:01:27,030 --> 00:01:28,963 I drive a saloon car. 7 00:01:31,632 --> 00:01:35,335 James drives a catering lorry. 8 00:01:36,603 --> 00:01:39,504 And Richard has a knife fight. 9 00:01:39,505 --> 00:01:41,473 Let's dance. 10 00:01:42,976 --> 00:01:45,509 That is all to come, but first of all, 11 00:01:45,510 --> 00:01:48,580 let me talk you through where we are. It's South Africa. 12 00:01:48,581 --> 00:01:51,881 Over there, in the distance, you can see Johannesburg. 13 00:01:51,882 --> 00:01:56,585 But this place here is called The Cradle of Humankind. 14 00:01:56,586 --> 00:01:59,620 Now it's called that because archaeologists have determined 15 00:01:59,621 --> 00:02:04,992 it was on this very spot that mankind separated from the ape. 16 00:02:04,993 --> 00:02:07,260 Ahem. 17 00:02:10,431 --> 00:02:11,863 Well, I mean... 18 00:02:14,200 --> 00:02:16,001 See? We haven't even begun. 19 00:02:16,002 --> 00:02:17,368 - What? - Be reasonable. 20 00:02:17,368 --> 00:02:19,803 You've learnt to put socks on, 21 00:02:19,804 --> 00:02:21,338 but other than that, mate... 22 00:02:21,339 --> 00:02:23,373 Listen, I'm trying to be profound here, OK? 23 00:02:23,373 --> 00:02:25,307 - Carry on, carry on. - I'm trying to be profound. 24 00:02:25,309 --> 00:02:27,043 Because this is ground zero. 25 00:02:27,043 --> 00:02:29,543 This is where all of human history began. 26 00:02:29,544 --> 00:02:33,115 Anyone who comes here, it's like coming home. 27 00:02:33,116 --> 00:02:35,017 - Jeremy. - What? 28 00:02:35,018 --> 00:02:38,419 How long has it taken some of us to evolve from being apes? 29 00:02:38,420 --> 00:02:40,720 It's taken 30 00:02:40,721 --> 00:02:44,023 two million and a hundred... 31 00:02:51,396 --> 00:02:55,266 You at home may be wondering why everybody here is applauding, 32 00:02:57,701 --> 00:03:00,768 but it's because while the rest of mankind 33 00:03:00,770 --> 00:03:04,504 has managed to grasp the concept of arithmetic, 34 00:03:04,505 --> 00:03:07,540 the President of South Africa, Jacob Zuma... 35 00:03:07,541 --> 00:03:09,642 Well, how can I put this? He sort of hasn't. 36 00:03:09,643 --> 00:03:12,710 I've got a clip here to show you what I'm on about. 37 00:03:12,711 --> 00:03:17,382 We announce that our membership figures 38 00:03:18,584 --> 00:03:22,920 stood at... 769, 39 00:03:22,921 --> 00:03:24,755 eight-hundred and... 40 00:03:27,424 --> 00:03:28,957 700... 41 00:03:30,460 --> 00:03:32,226 Listen properly. 42 00:03:32,227 --> 00:03:37,565 769 thousand, 43 00:03:37,565 --> 00:03:40,567 820... 44 00:03:46,339 --> 00:03:49,075 I mean, honestly. 45 00:03:50,642 --> 00:03:52,976 The funny thing is... 46 00:03:52,977 --> 00:03:56,445 Jacob Zuma is a bit of a controversial figure here. 47 00:03:56,446 --> 00:03:59,082 He recently installed a swimming pool at his home. 48 00:03:59,083 --> 00:04:02,750 And then, because he'd used taxpayers' money to do that, 49 00:04:02,751 --> 00:04:07,521 he said it was actually a water storage facility in case of a fire. 50 00:04:07,523 --> 00:04:10,425 So, in other words, if he burst into flames, 51 00:04:10,425 --> 00:04:12,558 he can jump into it and put himself out 52 00:04:12,559 --> 00:04:16,895 in ten hundred and... three hundred... seconds. 53 00:04:16,896 --> 00:04:18,130 He has also bought himself 54 00:04:18,131 --> 00:04:19,898 what he claims is a fire engine. 55 00:04:19,898 --> 00:04:21,699 Nice. 56 00:04:23,434 --> 00:04:25,202 He's also got himself an ambulance. 57 00:04:25,203 --> 00:04:28,304 Yep. Can't be too careful. 58 00:04:28,305 --> 00:04:30,607 Motoring in South Africa. 59 00:04:30,608 --> 00:04:32,941 Big problem here, of course, is the wildlife, 60 00:04:32,942 --> 00:04:35,643 because how do you accurately warn motorists 61 00:04:35,644 --> 00:04:38,278 that there may be a deer-y thing ahead 62 00:04:38,280 --> 00:04:40,679 and it could be full of helium? 63 00:04:41,816 --> 00:04:43,482 Well, the authorities have had a go. 64 00:04:43,483 --> 00:04:45,384 They've come up with this as a sign. 65 00:04:45,385 --> 00:04:48,952 It's not bad, except they've got the word wrong. 66 00:04:52,124 --> 00:04:53,857 What? 67 00:04:53,859 --> 00:04:55,259 It's wrong, isn't it? 68 00:04:55,261 --> 00:04:56,960 - It's not baboons. - No, it's not. 69 00:04:56,961 --> 00:04:59,664 We're from England. We know that's not a baboon. 70 00:05:01,265 --> 00:05:03,966 Baboons are actually very dangerous here. 71 00:05:06,468 --> 00:05:07,935 Certainly, they've got a better idea 72 00:05:07,936 --> 00:05:11,003 of how to handle a gun than the local police. 73 00:05:13,141 --> 00:05:16,609 He's actually using that as a shooting stick. 74 00:05:16,610 --> 00:05:18,577 Shall we get on with the show? 75 00:05:18,578 --> 00:05:21,147 - Yes, good idea. Good plan. - Yes, let's. 76 00:05:21,148 --> 00:05:22,613 And we start with Aston Martin. 77 00:05:22,614 --> 00:05:24,982 The company must have had a meeting recently 78 00:05:24,982 --> 00:05:26,483 and the bosses must have said, 79 00:05:26,484 --> 00:05:27,816 "It's gonna be a few years now 80 00:05:27,817 --> 00:05:29,518 "until the next Bond film is out, 81 00:05:29,519 --> 00:05:31,554 "so what are we gonna do at Aston Martin 82 00:05:31,555 --> 00:05:33,788 to generate some headlines in the meantime?" 83 00:05:33,789 --> 00:05:35,691 And what they must have decided is, 84 00:05:35,692 --> 00:05:37,959 to make a car that is as good as a car can be. 85 00:05:37,960 --> 00:05:40,228 They weren't talking about making a racing car 86 00:05:40,229 --> 00:05:41,463 because in racing there are rules 87 00:05:41,464 --> 00:05:43,264 about how big the engine can be 88 00:05:43,266 --> 00:05:44,865 and what sort of tyres you can use. 89 00:05:44,866 --> 00:05:46,732 And they weren't talking about making a road car, 90 00:05:46,733 --> 00:05:49,635 that would have to meet emissions regulations, 91 00:05:49,636 --> 00:05:52,204 have comfy rubber bits in the suspension. 92 00:05:52,205 --> 00:05:53,837 And all that stuff would slow it down. 93 00:05:53,838 --> 00:05:55,506 Exactly. They wanted to make a car 94 00:05:55,507 --> 00:05:58,177 that adhered to no rules and no regulations. 95 00:05:58,178 --> 00:06:00,244 So they have. 96 00:06:09,319 --> 00:06:12,187 This is what they came up with. 97 00:06:18,192 --> 00:06:22,196 It costs L1.8 million. 98 00:06:23,463 --> 00:06:25,830 And it's called the Vulcan. 99 00:06:28,300 --> 00:06:30,535 Spectacular, isn't it? 100 00:06:35,371 --> 00:06:37,473 But not very practical. 101 00:06:57,022 --> 00:06:58,822 Oh, God. Ow! 102 00:06:58,823 --> 00:07:00,791 Agh! 103 00:07:04,728 --> 00:07:07,129 Hold on... Nope. 104 00:07:07,130 --> 00:07:10,032 How are you...? 105 00:07:10,033 --> 00:07:11,234 No. 106 00:07:11,235 --> 00:07:12,868 Agh! 107 00:07:12,868 --> 00:07:15,603 Now I'm totally stuck. 108 00:07:17,305 --> 00:07:19,004 Oh, yeah. 109 00:07:20,474 --> 00:07:23,442 You will be able to edit this out, won't you? 110 00:07:23,443 --> 00:07:25,411 I don't want people thinking I'm fat. 111 00:07:27,746 --> 00:07:29,848 Right. I'm gonna pop it into gear now. 112 00:07:29,849 --> 00:07:32,250 You may hear this a little bit. 113 00:07:37,788 --> 00:07:39,321 Good. First. 114 00:07:39,322 --> 00:07:41,623 Er... foot on clutch. 115 00:07:41,624 --> 00:07:46,428 And now it's time to fire up the seven-litre V12. 116 00:08:04,776 --> 00:08:06,642 It's quite normal. 117 00:08:17,286 --> 00:08:21,890 When I got going, things didn't get much better. 118 00:08:25,825 --> 00:08:30,060 Even at slow speeds, it is quite loud in here, 119 00:08:30,061 --> 00:08:33,364 which is why I'm wearing this silly face microphone 120 00:08:33,364 --> 00:08:36,433 so you can hear what I'm on about. 121 00:08:36,434 --> 00:08:40,837 The noisiest part of this car, however, is not the engine. 122 00:08:47,942 --> 00:08:49,810 That's the brakes. 123 00:08:51,513 --> 00:08:53,814 They are quite... They are quite squeaky. 124 00:08:58,050 --> 00:09:01,322 It actually sounds like I'm stamping on a piglet. 125 00:09:03,423 --> 00:09:07,325 And things get worse when you put your foot down. 126 00:09:13,430 --> 00:09:15,731 I'm not going to say that it's like 127 00:09:15,732 --> 00:09:18,933 being attacked by a bear because it isn't. 128 00:09:18,935 --> 00:09:22,369 But it is like being in a room with a bear 129 00:09:22,370 --> 00:09:25,339 that's thinking of attacking you. 130 00:09:25,340 --> 00:09:30,509 At the moment I've turned the engine down on this knob here 131 00:09:30,510 --> 00:09:32,345 to its minimum setting. 132 00:09:32,346 --> 00:09:35,614 It's only producing 500 horsepower. 133 00:09:37,015 --> 00:09:40,684 So it's not really the speed that's scary. 134 00:09:40,685 --> 00:09:42,417 Oh, God! 135 00:09:42,418 --> 00:09:44,919 It's the noise and the harshness 136 00:09:44,920 --> 00:09:46,956 and the vibrations. 137 00:09:51,626 --> 00:09:54,194 It's not a very well-equipped car either. 138 00:09:54,195 --> 00:09:57,229 The windows don't wind down, for instance. 139 00:09:57,230 --> 00:09:59,399 There are no toys at all. 140 00:09:59,400 --> 00:10:02,701 And you only get half a steering wheel. 141 00:10:06,504 --> 00:10:08,807 However, there is one amazing thing 142 00:10:08,808 --> 00:10:11,709 you get for your L1.8 million. 143 00:10:11,710 --> 00:10:15,879 An all-expenses-paid trip to a racetrack of your choice, 144 00:10:15,880 --> 00:10:17,713 where an Aston Martin test driver 145 00:10:17,714 --> 00:10:20,014 will teach you how to drive your car, 146 00:10:20,015 --> 00:10:23,451 not with the engine wound down to 500 horsepower, 147 00:10:23,452 --> 00:10:26,318 but with it turned up... 148 00:10:26,319 --> 00:10:28,021 ...to the max. 149 00:10:39,331 --> 00:10:42,466 Holy cow! Ha-ha-ha! 150 00:10:46,670 --> 00:10:51,739 The engine is now producing 820 horsepower. 151 00:10:51,740 --> 00:10:56,343 And the speed just beggars belief. 152 00:10:58,414 --> 00:10:59,880 The bear is in attack mode. 153 00:11:02,048 --> 00:11:07,885 The figures say it'll do 0-60 in 2.9 seconds. 154 00:11:07,886 --> 00:11:12,955 And has a top speed of 208 with that wing on the back. 155 00:11:12,956 --> 00:11:16,458 But it feels a hell of a lot faster than that. 156 00:11:16,459 --> 00:11:18,696 Oh, God! 157 00:11:26,668 --> 00:11:28,669 The other thing you get for your money 158 00:11:28,670 --> 00:11:30,471 is a squadron of mechanics. 159 00:11:33,305 --> 00:11:37,143 But sadly... not a handbrake. 160 00:11:38,910 --> 00:11:40,979 Right, what I've done now is I've taken... yes... 161 00:11:40,979 --> 00:11:43,313 I've taken the steering wheel off, 162 00:11:43,313 --> 00:11:46,451 so I can't put it in gear to stop it rolling away. 163 00:11:47,452 --> 00:11:50,052 Oh, God. 164 00:11:50,053 --> 00:11:52,186 Agh. 165 00:11:52,187 --> 00:11:54,122 Argh, argh... 166 00:11:57,592 --> 00:11:59,892 When I'd finally got it to stop, 167 00:11:59,894 --> 00:12:04,730 the jacks were deployed and the mechanics set to work. 168 00:12:04,731 --> 00:12:07,266 That's the thing about the Vulcan. 169 00:12:07,266 --> 00:12:10,033 Wing angle, roll bar, suspension, brakes. 170 00:12:10,034 --> 00:12:15,473 Everything can be adjusted to suit your personal taste. 171 00:12:15,474 --> 00:12:18,741 After ten minutes of pretending I knew what they were doing, 172 00:12:18,742 --> 00:12:21,010 I was back on the track. 173 00:12:24,513 --> 00:12:29,618 And the car felt... just as bonkers as it had done before. 174 00:12:31,352 --> 00:12:34,889 However, I've changed. 175 00:12:36,389 --> 00:12:39,023 I've been driving this thing now, 176 00:12:39,025 --> 00:12:40,924 I don't know, three or four hours, 177 00:12:40,926 --> 00:12:43,960 and I'm starting to... understand it. 178 00:12:43,962 --> 00:12:45,763 I'm starting to get used to it. 179 00:12:47,263 --> 00:12:49,501 I'm starting to trust it. 180 00:12:50,569 --> 00:12:53,703 Now I'm starting to understand... 181 00:12:53,704 --> 00:12:55,571 why the Vulcan can go round 182 00:12:55,572 --> 00:12:58,907 the Nardo handling circuit in southern Italy 183 00:12:58,908 --> 00:13:04,510 nine seconds faster than the McLaren P1. 184 00:13:04,511 --> 00:13:09,081 Nine seconds in car time, that's a year! 185 00:13:14,587 --> 00:13:16,554 You get phenomenal mechanical grip 186 00:13:16,555 --> 00:13:18,523 in the low-speed corners, 187 00:13:18,524 --> 00:13:20,289 and then, on the Isn't Straight, 188 00:13:20,290 --> 00:13:22,858 you've got a ton-and-a-half of downforce, 189 00:13:22,860 --> 00:13:24,994 thanks to its aerodynamics. 190 00:13:28,030 --> 00:13:32,732 Then you have the power from the engine, 191 00:13:32,734 --> 00:13:36,536 which feels, well, old-fashioned. 192 00:13:36,538 --> 00:13:38,070 Proper. 193 00:13:38,071 --> 00:13:41,306 I'm surprised it doesn't have carburettors. 194 00:13:41,307 --> 00:13:45,044 I love this thing very much. 195 00:13:49,580 --> 00:13:51,313 And what I love most of all 196 00:13:51,314 --> 00:13:53,449 is that it's not a test bed. 197 00:13:53,450 --> 00:13:57,554 It's not an example of what cars will be like in the future. 198 00:13:57,555 --> 00:14:01,791 It's a celebration of what they were like in the past. 199 00:14:02,859 --> 00:14:05,559 What it is... 200 00:14:05,560 --> 00:14:07,728 is old time rock'n'roll. 201 00:14:12,565 --> 00:14:14,867 Thank you, thank you. 202 00:14:14,868 --> 00:14:17,069 Thank you very much. 203 00:14:20,205 --> 00:14:22,038 - So... - What? 204 00:14:22,039 --> 00:14:24,306 I get the impression you quite liked the car. 205 00:14:24,307 --> 00:14:26,075 Oh, it's unbelievable. 206 00:14:26,076 --> 00:14:28,143 What I loved most of all is they've made it out of bits 207 00:14:28,144 --> 00:14:30,244 that they already had lying around in the factory. 208 00:14:30,245 --> 00:14:31,745 It's like you going home 209 00:14:31,747 --> 00:14:33,581 after your tripto South Africa, opening the fridge, 210 00:14:33,582 --> 00:14:34,915 and using what's there 211 00:14:34,917 --> 00:14:36,850 to make a delicious shepherd's pie. 212 00:14:36,851 --> 00:14:39,586 What, some stale milk and an old piece of cheese? 213 00:14:40,988 --> 00:14:43,623 - And it costs L1.8 million? - Yes. 214 00:14:43,624 --> 00:14:45,257 How much is that, Jeremy, in rand? 215 00:14:45,258 --> 00:14:47,593 Ten hundred and 30 million and a million. 216 00:14:48,961 --> 00:14:53,463 But for that it does 0-60 in 2.9 seconds? 217 00:14:53,464 --> 00:14:57,600 So it's nearly as fast as an Aventador or a Caterham R600, 218 00:14:57,601 --> 00:14:59,133 or an Ariel Atom V8, 219 00:14:59,134 --> 00:15:01,603 but much more expensive! 220 00:15:01,604 --> 00:15:03,771 And not road legal. 221 00:15:03,772 --> 00:15:06,472 Yes. Thank you very much for relieving yourself all over my enthusiasm. 222 00:15:06,473 --> 00:15:07,908 You're welcome. 223 00:15:07,909 --> 00:15:09,742 It is a brilliant, brilliant car. 224 00:15:09,744 --> 00:15:11,612 And only one question now remains. 225 00:15:11,613 --> 00:15:14,346 How fast will it go round our track 226 00:15:14,347 --> 00:15:16,247 in the hands of a man 227 00:15:16,248 --> 00:15:20,684 who thinks that everything British is basically communist? 228 00:15:20,685 --> 00:15:22,451 Here he is. 229 00:15:22,452 --> 00:15:25,755 Looking a bit confused. 230 00:15:25,755 --> 00:15:29,892 All right, folks, let's see what this bag of bolts will do. 231 00:15:29,893 --> 00:15:34,763 And he's off, and immediately on to the Isn't Straight. 232 00:15:34,764 --> 00:15:37,397 First corner coming up. 233 00:15:37,398 --> 00:15:40,700 And he's flat through there. That is ballsy. 234 00:15:40,701 --> 00:15:43,336 Changing down, though, for the second corner 235 00:15:43,337 --> 00:15:44,737 on the Isn't Straight, 236 00:15:44,738 --> 00:15:46,304 but now he can use full power. 237 00:15:46,305 --> 00:15:48,206 800 brake horsepower? 238 00:15:48,207 --> 00:15:50,643 Are you kiddin' me? 239 00:15:50,644 --> 00:15:55,211 Now, hard on the brakes for Your Name Here. 240 00:15:55,213 --> 00:15:57,513 He has got to be impressed with this. 241 00:15:57,513 --> 00:16:02,817 For about $50,000, I could get one of my old trucks NASCAR style. 242 00:16:02,818 --> 00:16:05,054 It's got 800 brake horsepower. 243 00:16:06,755 --> 00:16:08,222 Go deer hunting, 244 00:16:08,223 --> 00:16:10,422 you got room for a couple deer in the back. 245 00:16:10,423 --> 00:16:13,060 I don't think you can put no deer in this thing. 246 00:16:13,061 --> 00:16:14,728 Plenty of deer to run over, though, 247 00:16:14,728 --> 00:16:17,196 back on the Isn't Straight. 248 00:16:17,197 --> 00:16:19,831 James Bond drives one of these. 249 00:16:19,832 --> 00:16:23,066 Shit. Vin Diesel would whip his ass. 250 00:16:23,068 --> 00:16:26,103 Yes, I'm sure he would, but down into first. 251 00:16:26,103 --> 00:16:29,272 I don't know about this thing. 252 00:16:29,274 --> 00:16:31,676 It's like a red-headed stepchild I'm talkin'. 253 00:16:33,208 --> 00:16:35,542 Be damn ugly. 254 00:16:35,543 --> 00:16:38,579 Not sure he's fully concentrating past Old Lady's House. 255 00:16:38,580 --> 00:16:41,882 But he is flat out towards Substation. It is bumpy here. 256 00:16:41,883 --> 00:16:45,518 And there's new Tarmac on the apex. Will it kick the tail out? 257 00:16:45,519 --> 00:16:47,887 Yes, it does indeed. He's OK. 258 00:16:47,888 --> 00:16:50,088 Into Field of Sheep. No sheep today. 259 00:16:50,089 --> 00:16:51,589 And he's across the line. 260 00:16:54,726 --> 00:16:56,793 Hell of a track, though. 261 00:16:56,794 --> 00:16:59,162 - It is a hell of a track. - Big car. 262 00:16:59,164 --> 00:17:02,331 Anyway, we must now bring up the lap board 263 00:17:02,333 --> 00:17:06,301 and find out how fast the American got round in the Vulcan. 264 00:17:06,302 --> 00:17:08,803 Let's have a look. Ooh, it's quick. 265 00:17:08,804 --> 00:17:11,605 Oh, hello. Hello. 266 00:17:16,075 --> 00:17:20,045 There you go, see? Old time rock'n'roll. 267 00:17:20,046 --> 00:17:24,182 Old time rock'n'roll has beaten rap and techno. 268 00:17:24,183 --> 00:17:26,283 And R and B. 269 00:17:26,284 --> 00:17:28,084 - And is now at the top. - Very good. 270 00:17:28,085 --> 00:17:30,721 Well done, and thank you. Now we must move on. 271 00:17:30,722 --> 00:17:35,924 It's time for us to take a gentle stroll down Conversation Street. 272 00:17:41,162 --> 00:17:43,197 Right, sticking with Aston Martin, 273 00:17:43,198 --> 00:17:46,767 they've teamed up with Red Bull Racing to create this. 274 00:17:46,768 --> 00:17:49,536 It's called the 001. 275 00:17:49,537 --> 00:17:54,740 It has a V12, no turbos, none of that sort of hybrid witchcraft. 276 00:17:54,741 --> 00:17:57,775 Yet it produces 900 horsepower 277 00:17:57,776 --> 00:18:01,811 in a car that only weighs 900 kilos. 278 00:18:01,812 --> 00:18:04,412 Staggering. 279 00:18:04,413 --> 00:18:06,581 Well, more than staggering, that is a magic figure, 280 00:18:06,582 --> 00:18:09,350 cos that means it has one horsepower per kilogram. 281 00:18:09,351 --> 00:18:11,552 And no other car gets close to that. 282 00:18:11,553 --> 00:18:15,489 Not remotely. The Vulcan's barely half that. It's staggering. 283 00:18:15,490 --> 00:18:18,958 The only problem I have with this... and you just have to look at it. 284 00:18:18,959 --> 00:18:21,260 Another angle we've got here. Look at that. 285 00:18:21,261 --> 00:18:24,662 You know that car is gonna be all about aerodynamics 286 00:18:24,663 --> 00:18:26,931 and particularly downforce. 287 00:18:26,933 --> 00:18:28,231 And I hate downforce. 288 00:18:28,232 --> 00:18:30,401 What do you mean, you hate downforce? 289 00:18:30,401 --> 00:18:34,772 Because they tell you you can go round a 90-degree bend at 100mph 290 00:18:34,773 --> 00:18:37,373 because of the weight of the air pressing down on the body. 291 00:18:37,374 --> 00:18:39,641 It's like having an invisible elephant. 292 00:18:39,642 --> 00:18:42,577 What if the elephant falls off? 293 00:18:44,178 --> 00:18:45,913 It's not a real elephant! It can't fall off! 294 00:18:45,914 --> 00:18:48,048 But how can you trust something you don't see? 295 00:18:48,049 --> 00:18:52,050 Wait. No, I'm with him because what if you drove through a sudden vacuum? 296 00:18:52,051 --> 00:18:54,788 Well, that's not gonna happen either, is it? 297 00:18:54,789 --> 00:18:56,789 Hammond, listen. There has to be a speed 298 00:18:56,790 --> 00:18:58,590 in a car with active downforce, like that one, 299 00:18:58,591 --> 00:19:02,158 where you go round a corner too fast for the tyres, 300 00:19:02,159 --> 00:19:03,827 too fast for the mechanical grip, 301 00:19:03,828 --> 00:19:06,930 but not fast enough for the downforce to be working. 302 00:19:06,931 --> 00:19:08,496 So you'd have to say to the police, 303 00:19:08,497 --> 00:19:11,565 "I crashed because I wasn't going fast enough." 304 00:19:11,566 --> 00:19:12,967 - It's true. - Potentially. 305 00:19:12,968 --> 00:19:14,534 There's another point, actually, 306 00:19:14,536 --> 00:19:16,370 the handling is gonna depend on the weather. 307 00:19:16,371 --> 00:19:19,272 If it's a really hot day, the air will be thinner. 308 00:19:19,273 --> 00:19:22,308 - No, thicker. - No, it's thinner on a hot day. 309 00:19:22,309 --> 00:19:24,310 See, I'd be messed up already cos I'd have the wrong... 310 00:19:24,312 --> 00:19:26,145 That's the point. You got a really hot day, 311 00:19:26,146 --> 00:19:27,946 and you don't really want to be driving a car 312 00:19:27,947 --> 00:19:29,481 where whether or not you get round a corner 313 00:19:29,481 --> 00:19:31,581 depends on whether or not the sun's out. 314 00:19:31,582 --> 00:19:35,251 So you now want weather forecasts to include cornering speeds? 315 00:19:35,252 --> 00:19:37,320 It's not just weather. Altitude. 316 00:19:37,320 --> 00:19:40,022 You could drive that car round a corner at 100mph 317 00:19:40,023 --> 00:19:42,057 in Holland, sea level, 318 00:19:42,058 --> 00:19:43,859 but, what are we here, 6,000 feet up? 319 00:19:43,860 --> 00:19:45,360 6,000 feet up here. 320 00:19:45,361 --> 00:19:47,661 You'd barely be able to get round at three mph. 321 00:19:47,662 --> 00:19:50,163 You'd crash it into a tree, or a visible elephant. 322 00:19:50,164 --> 00:19:52,833 They are real. 323 00:19:52,833 --> 00:19:55,699 Exactly. I just... Honestly, downforce... 324 00:19:55,700 --> 00:19:58,336 I don't like having to trust something you can't see. 325 00:19:58,337 --> 00:20:01,539 It's like North Korea. 326 00:20:01,541 --> 00:20:04,509 Or the contraceptive pill. 327 00:20:06,945 --> 00:20:08,745 That was an overshare. 328 00:20:08,746 --> 00:20:12,313 There's actually another hyper car I want to draw your attention to. 329 00:20:12,314 --> 00:20:14,749 - Replacement for the Veyron. - Oooh! 330 00:20:14,750 --> 00:20:16,584 That is the Bugatti Chiron. 331 00:20:16,585 --> 00:20:20,453 It's got a quad turbo 8-litre W16 engine, 332 00:20:20,454 --> 00:20:24,357 which every minute inhales 13,000 gallons of air. 333 00:20:24,358 --> 00:20:26,625 - Just imagine. - It's unbelievable. 334 00:20:26,626 --> 00:20:28,560 1,500 horsepower. 335 00:20:28,561 --> 00:20:32,998 And the top speed is limited to 261 mph. 336 00:20:32,999 --> 00:20:36,900 They say it would do 288 but that would be irresponsible on the road. 337 00:20:38,836 --> 00:20:41,871 It's got diamonds in the speakers for better sound quality. 338 00:20:41,872 --> 00:20:43,905 Of course it has, yeah. 339 00:20:43,906 --> 00:20:49,511 Oh, you'll like this. At top speed, the force on each tyre is 3,800G. 340 00:20:49,512 --> 00:20:51,012 A man dies at 9G. 341 00:20:51,013 --> 00:20:53,213 If you drive the Chiron flat out 342 00:20:53,213 --> 00:20:55,647 it'll drain its tank in nine minutes. 343 00:20:57,184 --> 00:20:59,286 Nine minutes? 344 00:20:59,286 --> 00:21:01,752 Hang on a minute. 261mph at nine minutes. 345 00:21:01,753 --> 00:21:05,156 That means you'd have to fill up with fuel every 39 miles. 346 00:21:05,156 --> 00:21:08,893 Well, less... you can't drive until you run out, you'd have to look for a petrol station. 347 00:21:08,894 --> 00:21:11,694 Yes, James, it really isn't a practical car, is it? 348 00:21:12,996 --> 00:21:15,231 Gonna give you the most amazing stat, though. 349 00:21:15,232 --> 00:21:17,332 It's about the people who are buying this car. 350 00:21:17,333 --> 00:21:19,300 They've got 200 orders so far. 351 00:21:19,301 --> 00:21:21,468 And the average person who's ordered one 352 00:21:21,469 --> 00:21:28,241 already has 64 cars, three helicopters, three jets and one yacht. 353 00:21:28,242 --> 00:21:29,741 Zuma. 354 00:21:34,948 --> 00:21:38,582 I reckon he's got one already. 355 00:21:38,582 --> 00:21:41,052 Didn't say that. He didn't say that. 356 00:21:41,052 --> 00:21:43,685 Shall we move it on? 357 00:21:43,686 --> 00:21:48,390 In South Africa, there are 35 carjackings every day. 358 00:21:48,391 --> 00:21:50,457 - Every day? - Every day. 359 00:21:50,458 --> 00:21:53,359 I've got to say, well done, that's an amazing figure. 360 00:21:53,360 --> 00:21:56,931 I can't believe it. How have you got time to come here? 361 00:21:56,932 --> 00:21:58,632 Cos you've got stuff to do. 362 00:21:58,633 --> 00:22:01,067 They've all come here in someone else's car. 363 00:22:01,068 --> 00:22:02,936 So you've already done it? 364 00:22:02,937 --> 00:22:05,937 But what they don't realise is they're all walking home. 365 00:22:05,938 --> 00:22:07,539 I've done a bit of research. 366 00:22:07,540 --> 00:22:11,307 The most commonly jacked cars, carjacked cars, 367 00:22:11,308 --> 00:22:15,677 are the VW Polo, the Toyota Hiace and the Toyota Hilux. 368 00:22:15,677 --> 00:22:17,479 But they're the best-selling cars in South Africa. 369 00:22:17,480 --> 00:22:20,649 Exactly. The VW Polo is the best-selling car in South Africa. 370 00:22:20,650 --> 00:22:22,250 So why would you buy a car 371 00:22:22,251 --> 00:22:25,486 which increases your chance of being shot in the head and your car being stolen? 372 00:22:25,487 --> 00:22:29,422 Why not buy a car that nobody would want to steal? 373 00:22:29,423 --> 00:22:33,960 No, cos if I lived here, I'd get something like a beige Volvo Estate. 374 00:22:33,961 --> 00:22:36,693 That's just a car you want! 375 00:22:36,694 --> 00:22:39,329 You're using it as an excuse to get your dream car. 376 00:22:40,765 --> 00:22:43,032 Look, Hammond, I've explained it to you before. 377 00:22:43,033 --> 00:22:46,369 Having a Volvo Estate is a bit like needing to go to the dentist. 378 00:22:46,370 --> 00:22:49,271 It's gonna happen. Get it over with. Just do it. 379 00:22:49,272 --> 00:22:51,306 I don't want to get it over with. 380 00:22:51,307 --> 00:22:52,975 That's like going to the dentist and saying, 381 00:22:52,976 --> 00:22:55,276 "Take all my teeth out cos they're gonna fall out." 382 00:22:55,277 --> 00:22:58,011 At the barber's: "Just pull it all out, it'll fall out anyway." 383 00:22:58,012 --> 00:23:02,714 The doctor: "Stop me being able to retain my urine. It's gonna happen, too." 384 00:23:02,715 --> 00:23:05,986 I'm gonna bury myself and get it all over with once and for all. 385 00:23:05,986 --> 00:23:07,820 He has got a point, seriously. 386 00:23:07,821 --> 00:23:10,288 Let's enjoy it before we have to have the Volvo. 387 00:23:10,289 --> 00:23:14,258 But why do you all buy cars that you're going to get carjacked in? 388 00:23:14,258 --> 00:23:16,392 Has anyone got a Volkswagen Polo here? 389 00:23:16,393 --> 00:23:20,329 You have? Did you buy that for yourself? 390 00:23:20,330 --> 00:23:22,396 - My dad bought it for me. - Your dad bought it? 391 00:23:22,397 --> 00:23:25,431 Wow! Oh, nice gift! 392 00:23:25,432 --> 00:23:27,735 What sort of madness is this? 393 00:23:27,736 --> 00:23:31,005 Has anyone got a Toyota Hilux? 394 00:23:31,006 --> 00:23:33,006 Yeah. This is insanity. 395 00:23:33,007 --> 00:23:35,374 Is it yours? 396 00:23:35,375 --> 00:23:38,076 What did you start out with this morning? 397 00:23:38,077 --> 00:23:39,711 It's unbelievable. 398 00:23:39,712 --> 00:23:41,612 Anyway, listen, we gotta move it on. 399 00:23:41,613 --> 00:23:43,813 Because, here in South Africa, 400 00:23:43,814 --> 00:23:46,317 people have an interesting approach to preventing car theft. 401 00:23:46,318 --> 00:23:48,283 Got a picture here of one man's solution. 402 00:23:48,284 --> 00:23:50,120 That's a python. 403 00:23:50,121 --> 00:23:52,287 Now there's no question it's gonna work. 404 00:23:52,288 --> 00:23:55,524 I would not steal a car that had that on the dashboard. 405 00:23:55,524 --> 00:23:57,858 However, a python's not like a burglar alarm. 406 00:23:57,858 --> 00:23:59,827 You can't turn it off. 407 00:23:59,828 --> 00:24:02,229 When you come back to your car, how do you say to the snake, 408 00:24:02,230 --> 00:24:03,929 "It's my car, don't strangle me." 409 00:24:03,931 --> 00:24:05,563 You can't. 410 00:24:05,565 --> 00:24:07,598 I'm pretty sure you can't train a python, can you? 411 00:24:07,600 --> 00:24:09,868 You can't. That's why you never see sheep snakes 412 00:24:09,868 --> 00:24:12,038 or guide snakes for the blind. 413 00:24:12,039 --> 00:24:13,570 It'll never happen. 414 00:24:13,571 --> 00:24:15,672 I have to say, 415 00:24:15,673 --> 00:24:18,042 in England, we've got an even more stupid solution. 416 00:24:18,043 --> 00:24:20,809 This chap's come up with an idea called "Bike Mine". 417 00:24:20,810 --> 00:24:24,479 I've got a video of him here explaining how it works. 418 00:24:24,480 --> 00:24:28,149 It can be attached quickly to protect almost any personal possession 419 00:24:28,150 --> 00:24:30,217 you store outside or in a garage or shed. 420 00:24:30,217 --> 00:24:33,886 Its robust steel construction is covered in a rubber skin 421 00:24:33,887 --> 00:24:35,755 to protect your property. 422 00:24:35,756 --> 00:24:38,390 Bike Mine is safe because the detonators are self-contained... 423 00:24:38,392 --> 00:24:41,226 as well as legal to own and use. 424 00:24:41,227 --> 00:24:44,395 Bike Mine is reliable because there are no batteries to run down 425 00:24:44,396 --> 00:24:47,064 and only one moving part. 426 00:24:53,070 --> 00:24:56,072 It's not gonna work. 427 00:24:56,073 --> 00:24:57,839 What I can't understand is, 428 00:24:57,840 --> 00:25:00,375 he said it can also protect any other personal property you may have. 429 00:25:00,376 --> 00:25:02,543 What, like a Ming vase? 430 00:25:02,544 --> 00:25:06,113 "Are you worried about your child being kidnapped? 431 00:25:06,113 --> 00:25:08,114 Simply hang this bomb round their neck." 432 00:25:09,616 --> 00:25:12,384 So, moving on, to Jordan, weirdly, 433 00:25:12,385 --> 00:25:15,286 where the government has just built a mock town, 434 00:25:15,287 --> 00:25:17,588 so that special forces from all over the world 435 00:25:17,589 --> 00:25:19,989 can turn up and have a competition 436 00:25:19,990 --> 00:25:22,159 to see which one is best. 437 00:25:22,159 --> 00:25:24,460 Yes, and this year, Mr Wilman, 438 00:25:24,461 --> 00:25:27,730 who is the Fat Man who controls our lives, 439 00:25:27,731 --> 00:25:29,631 decided that us three should go and take part. 440 00:25:29,632 --> 00:25:31,632 Obviously there'd be a lot of shooting, 441 00:25:31,633 --> 00:25:33,567 running about and doing somersaults. 442 00:25:33,568 --> 00:25:35,635 None of which we'd be any good at. 443 00:25:35,636 --> 00:25:39,271 No, but, the SAS, the world's first special forces unit, 444 00:25:39,272 --> 00:25:41,640 was created to be fast, 445 00:25:41,641 --> 00:25:43,542 to get into the battle quickly and then get out again. 446 00:25:43,543 --> 00:25:47,146 So there would also be a lot of high-speed driving. 447 00:25:47,147 --> 00:25:48,779 - Erm... - Yes, I know. 448 00:25:48,780 --> 00:25:51,182 That is a bit of a problem. We'll gloss over that. 449 00:25:51,183 --> 00:25:54,784 Anyway, we were sent out there and this is what happened. 450 00:26:11,364 --> 00:26:13,132 This is it. 451 00:26:13,133 --> 00:26:16,235 The special forces training base deep inside Amman. 452 00:26:16,236 --> 00:26:19,370 The city, obviously, not... not... 453 00:26:19,371 --> 00:26:23,606 Anyway, arriving now to demonstrate what we'd have to do later, 454 00:26:23,607 --> 00:26:26,942 a squad of special forces soldiers. 455 00:26:26,943 --> 00:26:30,279 They exfoliated from a Black Hawk helicopter on ropes 456 00:26:30,280 --> 00:26:34,915 and then fought their way through a terrorist-infested building. 457 00:26:40,487 --> 00:26:42,887 Their next task was to steal a car, 458 00:26:42,888 --> 00:26:46,759 which they used to reach a hijacked airliner. 459 00:26:49,061 --> 00:26:52,629 Here they stormed the cabin, killed the bad guys... 460 00:26:55,167 --> 00:26:56,833 and rescued a VIP. 461 00:26:59,336 --> 00:27:03,637 There was then a high-speed car chase and a running gun battle, 462 00:27:03,639 --> 00:27:05,806 as they escorted the rescued hostage 463 00:27:05,807 --> 00:27:08,342 to the safety of a nearby embassy. 464 00:27:14,282 --> 00:27:16,315 That was quite impressive. 465 00:27:16,317 --> 00:27:17,848 Well, it's not like they were 466 00:27:17,849 --> 00:27:19,318 - using real bullets. - Yes, they were. 467 00:27:19,318 --> 00:27:21,186 - They were not. - They were! 468 00:27:21,187 --> 00:27:23,086 Are you saying that on this, 469 00:27:23,087 --> 00:27:25,955 let's be honest, training ground, 470 00:27:25,956 --> 00:27:29,292 people are allowed to run around with real bullets in these guns? 471 00:27:29,293 --> 00:27:30,726 - Yes. - Rubbish. 472 00:27:33,729 --> 00:27:37,465 And there you are. Real bullets. 473 00:27:37,467 --> 00:27:39,566 And I managed to shoot myself. 474 00:27:39,567 --> 00:27:41,868 - Oh, yeah. - How did you do that? 475 00:27:41,869 --> 00:27:43,436 Well, because, on an assault rifle, 476 00:27:43,437 --> 00:27:45,405 the bullets come out this side 477 00:27:45,406 --> 00:27:48,540 and I'm a left-handed shot, so they just go up my arm, the casings. 478 00:27:48,541 --> 00:27:50,708 You're gonna be rubbish at this. 479 00:27:50,709 --> 00:27:53,477 Well, I'm not going to be able to use an assault rifle. 480 00:27:53,478 --> 00:27:55,779 I'm not gonna be able to storm that airliner. 481 00:27:55,780 --> 00:27:58,415 I'm not gonna be able to get out of the helicopter. 482 00:28:00,050 --> 00:28:02,619 Fearing that things may not go well, 483 00:28:02,620 --> 00:28:04,985 we were told to go and get ready. 484 00:28:04,986 --> 00:28:08,590 And even that was fraught with difficulty. 485 00:28:11,527 --> 00:28:13,760 Why are you wearing white? 486 00:28:13,761 --> 00:28:15,661 Snow camouflage. 487 00:28:15,662 --> 00:28:19,232 It has never, ever snowed in Jordan. 488 00:28:19,233 --> 00:28:20,764 I didn't know where Jordan was. 489 00:28:20,766 --> 00:28:22,800 You're gonna be quite visible. 490 00:28:24,270 --> 00:28:26,036 At this point, we received details 491 00:28:26,037 --> 00:28:29,240 of our mission from our boss, Mr Wilman. 492 00:28:29,241 --> 00:28:31,774 "Each time one of you is killed, 493 00:28:31,775 --> 00:28:34,244 you all have to begin again." 494 00:28:35,578 --> 00:28:38,045 So it's like that Tom Cruise movie. 495 00:28:38,046 --> 00:28:39,480 What, Cocktail? 496 00:28:39,481 --> 00:28:42,649 No, not Cocktail. Or Rain Man. 497 00:28:42,650 --> 00:28:44,851 This is gonna take forever. 498 00:28:52,691 --> 00:28:56,261 Nevertheless, we were soon in the helicopter 499 00:28:56,262 --> 00:28:59,729 on our way to the start of this important rescue mission. 500 00:29:01,266 --> 00:29:03,265 Let's just get this straight. 501 00:29:03,266 --> 00:29:05,334 When we get over the building, 502 00:29:05,335 --> 00:29:07,269 we leap out of the door 503 00:29:07,270 --> 00:29:09,472 and grab the rope and slide down it? 504 00:29:09,473 --> 00:29:12,173 Pretty much, yeah, that's it. That's how it goes. 505 00:29:12,174 --> 00:29:13,874 You could be leader. 506 00:29:13,875 --> 00:29:17,177 Get out there, show us how it's done, we will follow. 507 00:29:17,178 --> 00:29:18,811 I don't want to. 508 00:29:18,811 --> 00:29:21,646 I've never climbed a rope or gone down one in my life. 509 00:29:21,647 --> 00:29:23,282 Well, what a time. Get on with it. 510 00:29:23,283 --> 00:29:25,549 Why don't you go first? 511 00:29:25,550 --> 00:29:27,318 I can't do that. I'm scared of heights. 512 00:29:27,319 --> 00:29:29,387 Lead by example. 513 00:29:29,388 --> 00:29:32,490 - Be an inspiration to your men. - Yeah, exactly. 514 00:29:33,357 --> 00:29:35,291 How high will it be? 515 00:29:35,292 --> 00:29:38,193 - 30 feet? - Yeah. You'll be fine. 516 00:29:38,194 --> 00:29:41,195 What happens if you fell 30 feet? 517 00:29:41,197 --> 00:29:42,697 Would you be going home with a head wand? 518 00:29:42,698 --> 00:29:44,464 You'd be going home in this helicopter 519 00:29:44,465 --> 00:29:45,765 but not in that seat. 520 00:29:45,766 --> 00:29:47,602 You'd be in a bucket in the corner. 521 00:29:56,309 --> 00:29:59,511 OK, here it comes. Let's do this! 522 00:30:05,316 --> 00:30:08,883 Whoa! Jesus Christ! Stop! 523 00:30:08,884 --> 00:30:10,320 Oh, shit. 524 00:30:10,320 --> 00:30:11,786 I'm very scared. 525 00:30:11,787 --> 00:30:13,355 Mate, that's not the attitude. 526 00:30:13,356 --> 00:30:15,122 - Go on, then! - Don't like it! 527 00:30:15,123 --> 00:30:16,924 - Go down the rope! - Don't want to do it. 528 00:30:16,925 --> 00:30:18,825 - Loosen your hands a bit. - I don't want to. 529 00:30:18,826 --> 00:30:20,859 Do you want me to tickle you on your belly? 530 00:30:20,860 --> 00:30:22,796 - No. - Well, go on, then! 531 00:30:28,734 --> 00:30:30,534 - Hammond! - Yeah? 532 00:30:30,535 --> 00:30:32,036 My trousers have fallen down. 533 00:30:33,871 --> 00:30:37,473 Ladies and gentlemen, Chuck Norris. 534 00:30:38,974 --> 00:30:41,577 Oh, no, no. 535 00:30:41,578 --> 00:30:44,880 Oh, yes. Have you ever 536 00:30:44,880 --> 00:30:47,847 in your whole life seen anything... 537 00:30:47,848 --> 00:30:49,050 Aaagh! 538 00:30:54,787 --> 00:30:57,421 I know I made that rope thing look a bit difficult, 539 00:30:57,423 --> 00:31:00,491 but actually it's surprisingly easy. 540 00:31:00,491 --> 00:31:02,827 So, why don't you go first? 541 00:31:02,827 --> 00:31:05,595 - I've got a better idea. - What? 542 00:31:05,596 --> 00:31:07,631 Why don't we just land the helicopter? 543 00:31:07,631 --> 00:31:10,500 That is a good idea. Helicopters can land. 544 00:31:25,379 --> 00:31:27,547 Stop, stop, stop. Hammond. 545 00:31:27,548 --> 00:31:30,747 Right, listen, you open the door, 546 00:31:30,748 --> 00:31:33,149 and I'll throw this stun grenade in. 547 00:31:33,150 --> 00:31:34,386 Good idea. In three... 548 00:31:34,387 --> 00:31:35,652 No, wait, wait! 549 00:31:35,653 --> 00:31:37,452 I don't know how it works. 550 00:31:37,453 --> 00:31:39,054 Oh, for God's sake. 551 00:31:42,425 --> 00:31:44,726 Right. You ready, Hammond? 552 00:31:44,726 --> 00:31:46,794 Go! 553 00:31:48,263 --> 00:31:49,863 Come on! 554 00:31:53,100 --> 00:31:55,134 I thought you said it was a stun grenade? 555 00:31:55,135 --> 00:31:57,769 I meant smoke. 556 00:31:57,770 --> 00:31:59,471 I can't see a thing! 557 00:31:59,472 --> 00:32:01,639 Literally nothing. 558 00:32:01,641 --> 00:32:04,107 When the smoke finally cleared, 559 00:32:04,108 --> 00:32:05,610 we started our sweep. 560 00:32:07,311 --> 00:32:09,111 Ssh. Quiet. 561 00:32:18,520 --> 00:32:20,587 Dog. Dog. 562 00:32:20,588 --> 00:32:24,425 No! It means door. There's a door! 563 00:32:24,426 --> 00:32:26,759 There's a door. 564 00:32:26,760 --> 00:32:28,560 It's not a bloody football, is it? 565 00:32:28,561 --> 00:32:31,095 - Kick it. - You put your foot flat. 566 00:32:32,532 --> 00:32:34,434 That's how you do it. 567 00:32:35,467 --> 00:32:37,437 - Nobody there. - It's empty. 568 00:32:43,473 --> 00:32:46,174 Nobody there. 569 00:32:46,175 --> 00:32:49,010 Soon, though, they were there. 570 00:32:58,118 --> 00:33:00,520 We are trapped in this room. 571 00:33:00,521 --> 00:33:02,820 Well, why don't we just go out of the window? 572 00:33:02,821 --> 00:33:04,588 We could go out of the window. 573 00:33:04,589 --> 00:33:07,057 Yeah, we could do that. Cover us. 574 00:33:07,058 --> 00:33:10,060 Yeah, I'll cover you. 575 00:33:10,061 --> 00:33:12,962 As Jeremy laid down covering fire... 576 00:33:14,197 --> 00:33:16,531 ...May and I climbed out of the window. 577 00:33:16,532 --> 00:33:19,067 But then, there was a problem. 578 00:33:23,305 --> 00:33:24,706 I'm stuck. 579 00:33:24,707 --> 00:33:26,875 - Well, push! - Ooh! 580 00:33:29,175 --> 00:33:30,542 What? 581 00:33:30,544 --> 00:33:32,811 The terrorists are in the room. 582 00:33:32,812 --> 00:33:34,479 How do you know? 583 00:33:34,480 --> 00:33:36,213 They're doing things to me. 584 00:33:36,214 --> 00:33:38,116 Ooh. 585 00:33:39,216 --> 00:33:41,117 Oooh. 586 00:33:42,320 --> 00:33:43,721 This is very uncomfortable. 587 00:33:43,722 --> 00:33:45,490 It's probably cos you're so tense. 588 00:33:45,490 --> 00:33:47,289 Ohh. James! 589 00:33:47,290 --> 00:33:49,190 - What? - Kill me. 590 00:33:49,191 --> 00:33:51,125 Shoot me. 591 00:33:51,126 --> 00:33:52,293 Gladly. 592 00:33:52,294 --> 00:33:53,927 Please hurry up. 593 00:33:53,928 --> 00:33:55,962 - Fully automatic? - Er... 594 00:33:55,963 --> 00:33:57,498 Get on with it! 595 00:33:57,499 --> 00:33:59,164 - Just give him the lot. - In ten... 596 00:33:59,165 --> 00:34:00,600 Not ten! 597 00:34:00,601 --> 00:34:02,366 All right, in... 598 00:34:02,367 --> 00:34:05,937 three, two, one. 599 00:34:08,307 --> 00:34:09,807 How did you miss? 600 00:34:09,809 --> 00:34:11,842 It's true what they say about machine guns. 601 00:34:11,844 --> 00:34:13,275 You can't hit a thing with them. 602 00:34:13,276 --> 00:34:15,512 - What? - Just kill me. 603 00:34:15,514 --> 00:34:17,513 We're trying! It's not that easy. 604 00:34:17,514 --> 00:34:19,114 Hang on. I'm out. 605 00:34:19,115 --> 00:34:20,948 - Use the shovel. Hit me with that. - Right. 606 00:34:20,950 --> 00:34:22,518 Do you want to say anything? 607 00:34:22,518 --> 00:34:24,985 Yes. Final words. I hate you. 608 00:34:24,986 --> 00:34:26,853 You know, I've dreamt about exactly this. 609 00:34:26,854 --> 00:34:28,523 - Hurry up! - Incoming! 610 00:34:35,294 --> 00:34:36,661 We are trapped in this room. 611 00:34:36,662 --> 00:34:38,562 Why don't we go out of the window? 612 00:34:38,563 --> 00:34:40,965 Do you mind if I go through the door? 613 00:34:43,635 --> 00:34:45,235 This is better. 614 00:34:48,539 --> 00:34:52,743 Heroically we fought off all the attackers outside the building. 615 00:34:54,443 --> 00:34:58,613 But then we were pinned down by a sniper. 616 00:35:01,748 --> 00:35:05,083 - James. James. - What? 617 00:35:05,084 --> 00:35:07,285 Go down there and steal that Renault. 618 00:35:07,286 --> 00:35:09,154 Why? 619 00:35:09,155 --> 00:35:11,455 Because this is a car show. We need a motoring element. 620 00:35:11,456 --> 00:35:14,191 - Good point. - Go! 621 00:35:14,192 --> 00:35:17,794 Can you think of anybody on God's green Earth 622 00:35:17,795 --> 00:35:21,296 less able to do this kind of thing than him? 623 00:35:22,164 --> 00:35:24,066 I mean, he can play the harpsichord 624 00:35:24,066 --> 00:35:26,634 but that's not a skill we're gonna need today. 625 00:35:28,370 --> 00:35:30,103 And he's been shot. 626 00:35:32,205 --> 00:35:33,772 - James. - What? 627 00:35:33,774 --> 00:35:36,575 - Go and steal that Renault over there. - Why? 628 00:35:36,576 --> 00:35:39,210 Because this is a car show. We need a motoring element. 629 00:35:39,212 --> 00:35:41,680 Good point. 630 00:35:41,681 --> 00:35:45,348 Can you think of anybody on God's green Earth 631 00:35:45,349 --> 00:35:47,984 who's less able to do this sort of thing than him? 632 00:35:49,687 --> 00:35:52,654 Can you think of anybody on God's green Earth... 633 00:35:54,123 --> 00:35:57,491 Can you think of anybody... 634 00:35:57,491 --> 00:35:59,426 Can you think... 635 00:35:59,427 --> 00:36:01,161 James, you can't just keep doing 636 00:36:01,162 --> 00:36:03,296 the same thing over and over again. 637 00:36:03,297 --> 00:36:04,598 Nah, he'll miss eventually. 638 00:36:04,599 --> 00:36:07,667 Oh, God. 639 00:36:07,667 --> 00:36:10,603 - Oh, for God's sake. - There it is. 640 00:36:10,604 --> 00:36:14,204 Because Corporal Stubborn wouldn't budge from his tactic, 641 00:36:14,205 --> 00:36:17,040 Richard and I decided that on our next attempt 642 00:36:17,041 --> 00:36:20,244 we'd go into battle with some new equipment. 643 00:36:22,012 --> 00:36:23,980 Go and steal that Renault. 644 00:36:45,064 --> 00:36:47,198 Go and steal that Renault over there. 645 00:36:59,842 --> 00:37:01,943 Ohhh! 646 00:37:05,079 --> 00:37:07,948 James, go and steal that Renault over there. 647 00:37:07,949 --> 00:37:10,215 - No. - What do you mean, no? 648 00:37:10,216 --> 00:37:13,285 Well, there's a garage over there. It'll have some vehicles in it. 649 00:37:13,286 --> 00:37:14,654 Oh, yeah. 650 00:37:17,723 --> 00:37:19,657 Now we're in a car show. 651 00:37:19,659 --> 00:37:24,026 Right, Jeremy, you go sort that sniper, we'll get these started. 652 00:37:24,027 --> 00:37:25,694 Good plan. 653 00:37:25,695 --> 00:37:28,765 Right, there's no keys. I'll hotwire it. 654 00:37:29,767 --> 00:37:31,233 Oh, there he is. 655 00:37:33,703 --> 00:37:35,770 Say hello to my little friend. 656 00:37:40,507 --> 00:37:43,541 Yes! What a shot! 657 00:37:43,542 --> 00:37:45,009 Ohhh! 658 00:37:45,010 --> 00:37:46,577 I'll never be able to do that again. 659 00:37:46,578 --> 00:37:48,178 - Jeremy! - What? 660 00:37:48,179 --> 00:37:50,681 James has electrocuted himself. 661 00:37:50,683 --> 00:37:52,082 Oh, what a... 662 00:37:55,852 --> 00:37:57,452 Say hello to my little friend. 663 00:37:57,453 --> 00:38:00,723 Right, there are no keys. I'll hotwire it. 664 00:38:00,724 --> 00:38:03,224 Have you not seen every single movie ever made? 665 00:38:15,234 --> 00:38:18,938 There's nowhere to put a gun. That is a bad mark for Audi. 666 00:38:21,708 --> 00:38:25,876 Sport, drive, traction control off. 667 00:38:25,877 --> 00:38:27,176 Here we go! 668 00:38:45,591 --> 00:38:47,727 Unbelievable. 669 00:38:49,728 --> 00:38:51,829 - Jeremy. - What? 670 00:38:51,830 --> 00:38:54,431 Why did your trousers fall down? 671 00:38:54,431 --> 00:38:57,099 Because there were so many grenades attached to them. 672 00:38:57,100 --> 00:38:59,001 And in the down-draught of the helicopter... 673 00:38:59,002 --> 00:39:02,237 I was very brave doing that. I was. 674 00:39:02,239 --> 00:39:05,107 - I'm sure I saw him crying. - They were tears of bravery. 675 00:39:05,107 --> 00:39:07,474 Oh, that well-known expression. Tears of bravery. 676 00:39:07,475 --> 00:39:10,343 Anyway, look, there's a bit of a trend in South Africa 677 00:39:10,344 --> 00:39:14,113 for making your own car, making a car from scratch. 678 00:39:14,114 --> 00:39:16,048 We've got an example here. 679 00:39:16,049 --> 00:39:18,650 This man's built this one based around the engine 680 00:39:18,651 --> 00:39:20,651 and a few bits from a BMW 318i. 681 00:39:20,651 --> 00:39:23,386 And I've got to say, I think that's pretty cool. 682 00:39:23,387 --> 00:39:25,356 - It's brilliant. - There are lots of these. 683 00:39:25,357 --> 00:39:28,925 I prefer this one, also with a BMW engine, a V8, 684 00:39:28,926 --> 00:39:30,760 but the bodywork is made of denim. 685 00:39:30,761 --> 00:39:33,328 A man of exquisite taste. 686 00:39:34,830 --> 00:39:36,265 I think the best of them all is so good, 687 00:39:36,265 --> 00:39:38,265 we've actually brought it into the studio. 688 00:39:38,266 --> 00:39:40,768 Look, it's down here. Unbelievable, this. 689 00:39:40,769 --> 00:39:43,769 It's a replica of a Mercedes C9. 690 00:39:43,771 --> 00:39:46,672 Now that, Hammond, was the car that won 691 00:39:46,673 --> 00:39:49,775 the 24-hour Le Mans race in 1989. 692 00:39:49,776 --> 00:39:52,810 And it's so amazing, I've brought out the man who built it. 693 00:39:52,811 --> 00:39:55,946 Ladies and gentlemen, give him a warm hand. Johan Ackermann! 694 00:39:55,947 --> 00:39:57,782 Thank you very much for coming. 695 00:40:01,384 --> 00:40:03,585 Can I just as... 696 00:40:03,586 --> 00:40:05,087 Can I just ask, Johan, 697 00:40:05,088 --> 00:40:08,189 how did you get the styling to work? 698 00:40:08,190 --> 00:40:11,025 Well, Jeremy, there was no drawings on the internet, 699 00:40:11,026 --> 00:40:13,593 so, erm... I got a book on the dimensions, 700 00:40:13,594 --> 00:40:16,996 but the closest I could get was a 1:32-scale model. 701 00:40:16,997 --> 00:40:19,364 Hang on, so you measured your toy car, 702 00:40:19,365 --> 00:40:22,934 multiplied it by 32 and built a full-sized one. 703 00:40:22,935 --> 00:40:24,268 - Yep. - That's how you did it? 704 00:40:24,269 --> 00:40:27,003 - Is it road legal? - Fully road legal. 705 00:40:27,004 --> 00:40:29,039 - It's a real car, not a model? - Yeah. 706 00:40:29,040 --> 00:40:31,107 How long did you spend building this? 707 00:40:31,108 --> 00:40:33,843 From start to roadworthy was 16 months. 708 00:40:33,844 --> 00:40:36,112 Right. Was there, or is there, 709 00:40:36,113 --> 00:40:37,913 a marriage to have survived this? 710 00:40:38,880 --> 00:40:40,882 Well, I hope so. 711 00:40:40,883 --> 00:40:42,449 My wife is here, so it must be a good sign. 712 00:40:42,450 --> 00:40:45,519 Hello, patient lady. 713 00:40:45,519 --> 00:40:47,853 Well, it's a remarkable achievement, and well done. 714 00:40:47,855 --> 00:40:49,387 Ladies and gentlemen, Johan Ackermann. 715 00:40:49,388 --> 00:40:51,890 That's brilliant. 716 00:40:51,891 --> 00:40:53,859 Brilliant. 717 00:40:56,761 --> 00:40:59,363 We're moving on to a great idea 718 00:40:59,364 --> 00:41:02,697 that Richard Hammond and I have had all by our own. 719 00:41:02,698 --> 00:41:04,935 - And it is brilliant. - It is. 720 00:41:04,936 --> 00:41:08,837 It's called, Making James May Do Something He Doesn't Want To Do. 721 00:41:10,139 --> 00:41:11,906 And we kick off with spinning. 722 00:41:11,907 --> 00:41:14,007 It's a South African thing. Fairly simple. 723 00:41:14,008 --> 00:41:16,043 You get an elderly rear-wheel-drive car, 724 00:41:16,043 --> 00:41:19,045 take it to a car park where you do doughnuts in it 725 00:41:19,046 --> 00:41:21,213 to a backdrop of strong rap music. 726 00:41:23,150 --> 00:41:25,750 It's lively, it's interesting, and it's youthful. 727 00:41:25,751 --> 00:41:27,852 It's everything he isn't. 728 00:41:46,101 --> 00:41:48,133 Well, here we are, then, 729 00:41:48,135 --> 00:41:50,770 at one of Jo'burg's top spinning destinations, 730 00:41:50,771 --> 00:41:54,005 the aptly-named Wheelz 'n' Smoke Arena. 731 00:41:54,006 --> 00:41:56,108 And the object of the exercise, 732 00:41:56,108 --> 00:41:57,641 as far as I can make out, 733 00:41:57,642 --> 00:41:59,878 is to create smoke. 734 00:42:02,881 --> 00:42:04,582 And drive round and round the arena 735 00:42:04,583 --> 00:42:06,616 until the tyres go bang. 736 00:42:08,518 --> 00:42:10,286 And then what's left of the tyres 737 00:42:10,287 --> 00:42:12,154 are put on a bonfire over there, 738 00:42:12,154 --> 00:42:14,721 to make sure there's absolutely nothing left. 739 00:42:24,162 --> 00:42:29,101 This is Stacy, and she's only about 17, I think. 740 00:42:29,102 --> 00:42:31,402 And the word round here and the noise in the crowd 741 00:42:31,403 --> 00:42:33,404 says that Stacy is actually very good at this. 742 00:42:33,405 --> 00:42:36,908 But how the bloody hell would I know? It's just a massive cloud of smoke... 743 00:42:38,574 --> 00:42:40,742 ...with some headlights occasionally appearing in it. 744 00:42:42,344 --> 00:42:44,678 To help me get into the spirit of things, 745 00:42:44,679 --> 00:42:48,581 the organisers suggested I should become more involved. 746 00:42:52,620 --> 00:42:55,354 Aaaargh! 747 00:42:58,624 --> 00:43:01,791 Look at the rev case, in the red constantly, mate. 748 00:43:04,429 --> 00:43:07,531 I don't like the smell of tyre smoke in the evening. 749 00:43:08,998 --> 00:43:11,166 Oi! Get back in! 750 00:43:12,668 --> 00:43:15,105 Get back in the car, you idiot! 751 00:43:16,571 --> 00:43:18,274 Help! 752 00:43:25,811 --> 00:43:27,947 Thank you. 753 00:43:39,257 --> 00:43:41,357 - Has it broken? - Yes. 754 00:43:41,359 --> 00:43:42,559 Finally. 755 00:43:59,974 --> 00:44:01,573 I got 20,000 miles 756 00:44:01,574 --> 00:44:04,977 out of the last set of rear tyres on my car. 757 00:44:33,299 --> 00:44:35,465 Just go out there and do it. 758 00:44:35,466 --> 00:44:37,401 Fancy trying to do that in England. 759 00:44:37,402 --> 00:44:39,535 Or anywhere. Or Australia. 760 00:44:39,536 --> 00:44:41,004 Anyway, mm-mm-mm. 761 00:44:41,005 --> 00:44:44,306 James May, was there any part of that that you enjoyed? 762 00:44:44,308 --> 00:44:46,574 - Nope. - Good. 763 00:44:46,576 --> 00:44:49,677 But now it is time for Celebrity Brain Crash. 764 00:44:57,318 --> 00:44:59,251 Now after what happened last week, 765 00:44:59,253 --> 00:45:01,620 our guest this week declined our offer 766 00:45:01,621 --> 00:45:04,322 to arrive at the studio on a hovercraft, 767 00:45:04,323 --> 00:45:06,124 saying she would prefer to walk. 768 00:45:06,125 --> 00:45:07,858 - It's understandable. - Yes, it is. 769 00:45:07,860 --> 00:45:09,560 I'm sure that despite this, 770 00:45:09,561 --> 00:45:12,362 you will still give her an enormous welcome. 771 00:45:12,363 --> 00:45:15,531 Although she's now a major Hollywood star, 772 00:45:15,532 --> 00:45:17,932 she was actually born here in South Africa. 773 00:45:17,933 --> 00:45:21,035 Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome Charlize Theron! 774 00:45:23,904 --> 00:45:27,240 We must ask her about A Million Ways To Die In The West. 775 00:45:27,242 --> 00:45:28,774 I love that film. 776 00:45:28,775 --> 00:45:31,510 But what I really love is the way she looks in it. 777 00:45:31,511 --> 00:45:35,713 The hat and the floaty skirt. She's on a bicycle as well. 778 00:45:38,716 --> 00:45:41,653 - Oh, no. - Oh, God. 779 00:45:42,853 --> 00:45:45,688 - Oh, not... - Ladies and gentlemen, 780 00:45:45,689 --> 00:45:47,755 Charlize Theron has been attacked by a lion. 781 00:45:47,756 --> 00:45:50,559 - Oh, no. - Literally nothing we can do. 782 00:45:52,262 --> 00:45:54,195 Does that mean she's not coming on, then? 783 00:45:54,196 --> 00:45:57,364 She's been eaten by a lion. 784 00:45:57,365 --> 00:45:59,832 Well, look, are there any other well-known 785 00:45:59,832 --> 00:46:01,433 South Africans in the audience? 786 00:46:01,434 --> 00:46:03,402 It's not very likely, James. 787 00:46:03,403 --> 00:46:05,236 There's only two globally famous South Africans. 788 00:46:05,237 --> 00:46:08,073 One's now in a lion and the other's in prison. 789 00:46:09,641 --> 00:46:11,807 Let's get back to what we were doing. 790 00:46:11,809 --> 00:46:15,145 Earlier on, we were at a Jordanian special forces training base 791 00:46:15,146 --> 00:46:17,645 learning to be super army soldiers. 792 00:46:17,646 --> 00:46:21,583 And we pick up the action as we rush towards the hijacked airliner 793 00:46:21,584 --> 00:46:25,487 to rescue a VIP and take them to safety. 794 00:46:37,097 --> 00:46:39,098 Let me talk you through the plan. 795 00:46:39,099 --> 00:46:44,602 James and Richard will use the catering lorry as an assault vehicle. 796 00:46:44,603 --> 00:46:47,170 And then, after we've rescued the VIP, 797 00:46:47,170 --> 00:46:51,207 we'll use the Audi as a getaway car. 798 00:46:55,676 --> 00:46:58,577 Now what we're doing here, very cleverly, 799 00:46:58,578 --> 00:47:00,547 is we're going round the back of the plane 800 00:47:00,548 --> 00:47:03,382 because planes don't have rear windows 801 00:47:03,383 --> 00:47:06,752 or door mirrors, so they won't see us sneaking up. 802 00:47:06,753 --> 00:47:08,454 Stealthy, you see. 803 00:47:09,689 --> 00:47:12,022 Hammond, we're manoeuvring in. 804 00:47:12,023 --> 00:47:14,258 - OK. - Dab the brakes. 805 00:47:17,560 --> 00:47:19,429 Right, we are in position. 806 00:47:19,430 --> 00:47:23,997 James is gonna lift me on this platform to the door, 807 00:47:23,998 --> 00:47:25,534 then we go in. 808 00:47:25,536 --> 00:47:27,835 Right, are you ready? 809 00:47:27,836 --> 00:47:29,703 I'm ready to lower the jacks. 810 00:47:29,705 --> 00:47:31,205 Absolute stealth. 811 00:47:42,947 --> 00:47:44,814 I think the terrorists 812 00:47:44,815 --> 00:47:46,884 are going to notice this assault. 813 00:48:04,930 --> 00:48:09,769 I think the terrorists are going to notice this assault. 814 00:48:09,770 --> 00:48:12,871 Which is why I shall now cause a diversion. 815 00:48:15,573 --> 00:48:18,508 I'm gonna make a smoking doughnut in front of the plane 816 00:48:18,509 --> 00:48:20,743 to distract the terrorists. 817 00:48:23,646 --> 00:48:25,980 Oh, no, this is a disaster. 818 00:48:25,981 --> 00:48:29,283 Even when you turn the traction control off, 819 00:48:29,284 --> 00:48:30,849 it isn't fully off, 820 00:48:30,851 --> 00:48:35,489 so you just get miles and miles of dreary understeer. 821 00:48:35,490 --> 00:48:37,691 Bad mark for Audi here. 822 00:48:41,495 --> 00:48:43,528 Come on! 823 00:48:43,529 --> 00:48:46,062 The only good thing is the terrorists will be looking 824 00:48:46,063 --> 00:48:47,264 out of the cockpit windows 825 00:48:47,265 --> 00:48:49,466 thinking, "Why is that Audi 826 00:48:49,467 --> 00:48:52,202 understeering around like that?" 827 00:48:52,202 --> 00:48:54,638 Right! Go low! 828 00:49:01,211 --> 00:49:02,643 Here I come! 829 00:49:02,644 --> 00:49:06,279 Cry havoc and let slip the dog of understeer! 830 00:49:21,326 --> 00:49:24,493 Chaps, I have located the VIP 831 00:49:24,494 --> 00:49:26,629 and it is the Queen of England. 832 00:49:26,630 --> 00:49:28,663 I don't like the Royal Family. 833 00:49:28,664 --> 00:49:32,234 James, now is not the time for your republican views. 834 00:49:32,235 --> 00:49:35,468 Ma'am, we are an elite fighting force. 835 00:49:35,469 --> 00:49:37,237 We have an Audi outside. We will... 836 00:49:42,108 --> 00:49:43,809 Why did you shoot Hammond? 837 00:49:43,810 --> 00:49:45,511 He was being annoying. 838 00:49:50,115 --> 00:49:53,082 That's how you do it! 839 00:49:55,252 --> 00:49:58,253 Ma'am, we are an elite fighting force. 840 00:49:58,255 --> 00:50:00,356 We have an Audi outside. We will... 841 00:50:05,627 --> 00:50:08,329 - Did you shoot May? - Well, he shot me! 842 00:50:12,332 --> 00:50:14,967 That's how you do it! 843 00:50:14,968 --> 00:50:18,937 Somehow in our next attempt, Hammond ended up on the wing. 844 00:50:21,005 --> 00:50:26,376 Oh, I see. You wanna do this the old-fashioned way. 845 00:50:26,378 --> 00:50:28,645 OK, let's dance. 846 00:50:30,414 --> 00:50:31,747 Aagh! 847 00:50:38,419 --> 00:50:41,153 Ma'am, we are an elite fighting force. 848 00:50:41,154 --> 00:50:44,957 We have an Audi waiting outside to get you to safety. 849 00:50:44,957 --> 00:50:47,425 - And what do you do? - I just said. 850 00:50:47,425 --> 00:50:49,861 We are an elite fighting force. 851 00:50:49,862 --> 00:50:52,397 We have an Audi waiting outside to get you to safety. 852 00:50:52,398 --> 00:50:54,264 - You'll like it, it's German. - Like you are. 853 00:50:54,265 --> 00:50:57,501 Thank you, James. Are all the terrorists dead back there? 854 00:50:57,502 --> 00:50:59,902 - Everybody's dead back there. - Good man. 855 00:50:59,903 --> 00:51:02,371 Your Majesty, if you'd like to follow us. 856 00:51:10,312 --> 00:51:12,913 What was that? 857 00:51:12,914 --> 00:51:15,315 He's just shot the Queen in the back of the head. 858 00:51:15,316 --> 00:51:17,850 Well, now what we gonna do? 859 00:51:19,420 --> 00:51:21,454 Oh... 860 00:51:24,856 --> 00:51:28,526 Go. I'll have that, thank you very much. 861 00:51:30,060 --> 00:51:33,194 Having finally got the Queen into the car, 862 00:51:33,195 --> 00:51:35,831 we were now faced with a perilous drive to the embassy. 863 00:51:38,634 --> 00:51:42,402 However, this did at least mean I could get back to my day job. 864 00:51:44,004 --> 00:51:47,873 I'll talk you through the car. This is the S8 Plus. 865 00:51:49,875 --> 00:51:53,109 Plus means it has 80 more horsepower than the standard car. 866 00:51:53,111 --> 00:51:57,080 That means 0-60 in 3.8 seconds, 867 00:51:57,081 --> 00:51:59,616 top speed: 190. 868 00:51:59,617 --> 00:52:01,785 How very interesting. 869 00:52:05,356 --> 00:52:09,056 The immense power is harnessed not only by all-wheel drive, 870 00:52:09,057 --> 00:52:11,359 but also by ceramic brakes. 871 00:52:12,726 --> 00:52:15,262 And an electronic differential. 872 00:52:15,262 --> 00:52:18,964 There's a time and a place for talking about that stuff, mate! 873 00:52:18,966 --> 00:52:20,932 Sitting behind a six-foot-five-inch driver 874 00:52:20,933 --> 00:52:23,435 means that rear leg room is rather at a premium. 875 00:52:23,436 --> 00:52:26,771 Having said that, however, for a high-performance saloon, 876 00:52:26,772 --> 00:52:28,837 the ride quality is really rather good. 877 00:52:28,838 --> 00:52:31,239 Will you two stop reviewing the car? 878 00:52:33,910 --> 00:52:36,178 Do you have an opinion, the Queen? 879 00:52:36,178 --> 00:52:37,813 Not now! 880 00:52:41,516 --> 00:52:43,452 Hold it steady, I'm gonna shoot them. 881 00:52:46,621 --> 00:52:49,522 Shoot him in the face! 882 00:52:49,523 --> 00:52:52,457 Have you come far? 883 00:52:57,595 --> 00:53:00,397 The Living Daylights. Transporter 2 and 3. 884 00:53:00,398 --> 00:53:01,464 Taken. Ronin. 885 00:53:01,465 --> 00:53:03,465 Why are you listing films? 886 00:53:03,466 --> 00:53:07,670 Because all those films had a big Audi saloon in them going quickly. 887 00:53:07,671 --> 00:53:11,540 It is the car of choice for the Hollywood hero. 888 00:53:12,708 --> 00:53:13,975 Shut up. 889 00:53:17,778 --> 00:53:20,278 What's the top speed of that thing, James? 890 00:53:20,278 --> 00:53:21,814 About 90 miles an hour. 891 00:53:21,815 --> 00:53:25,483 Well, here is a top tip for Hollywood heroes. 892 00:53:26,751 --> 00:53:28,520 If you're being chased by a car 893 00:53:28,521 --> 00:53:30,421 which is slower than the car you're in, 894 00:53:30,422 --> 00:53:35,425 simply drive faster than it. 895 00:53:35,426 --> 00:53:39,260 See, that's what Nick Cage ought to have thought about, really, in The Rock. 896 00:53:39,261 --> 00:53:42,763 And that man in Ronin, with the S8 chasing the Citroen. 897 00:53:42,764 --> 00:53:44,865 Stop talking about films! 898 00:53:44,865 --> 00:53:46,866 There's a bogey waxing our tail. 899 00:53:46,867 --> 00:53:49,034 - Oh, God! - Gonna shoot its petrol tank. 900 00:53:49,035 --> 00:53:53,873 James, there's no point shooting it. Petrol only blows up in films. 901 00:54:02,847 --> 00:54:05,080 Well, that's not strictly accurate. 902 00:54:05,082 --> 00:54:07,916 - Where the bloody hell is the embassy? - Go down here. 903 00:54:09,452 --> 00:54:11,453 - No, this is rubbish. - There it is. 904 00:54:11,454 --> 00:54:13,087 There it is! 905 00:54:13,088 --> 00:54:16,524 Right, you get the Queen to safety. I'll cover you. 906 00:54:16,524 --> 00:54:18,959 - OK, I'm on it. - Right, good. Go, go, go! 907 00:54:18,960 --> 00:54:20,226 Go, go, go! 908 00:54:20,227 --> 00:54:21,528 Your Majesty. 909 00:54:21,529 --> 00:54:24,196 Really quickly, Your Majesty. 910 00:54:26,131 --> 00:54:27,166 We can't see. 911 00:54:42,144 --> 00:54:43,679 Come on, Jeremy, come on! 912 00:54:43,680 --> 00:54:46,114 I'm doing my best! 913 00:54:47,548 --> 00:54:50,049 In the plums! 914 00:54:50,050 --> 00:54:51,285 Oh, no! 915 00:54:51,286 --> 00:54:52,753 Just keep moving! 916 00:54:55,589 --> 00:54:57,490 They've done it again! 917 00:54:57,491 --> 00:54:59,525 James, you're missing this! 918 00:54:59,526 --> 00:55:01,559 You cannot modernise the royalty, 919 00:55:01,560 --> 00:55:06,563 because royalty is, at the very best, a medieval concept. 920 00:55:08,132 --> 00:55:09,800 Oh! Shooting! 921 00:55:09,800 --> 00:55:12,668 That's gonna sting! He's still coming! 922 00:55:12,669 --> 00:55:14,302 Keep going! 923 00:55:14,303 --> 00:55:15,871 Mind the mines! 924 00:55:21,711 --> 00:55:23,309 He's still going! 925 00:55:45,729 --> 00:55:47,863 James, he's dead. 926 00:55:49,632 --> 00:55:53,365 No, wait a minute. He's going again! He's moving again! 927 00:55:53,367 --> 00:55:55,068 Jeremy, come on, you can do it! 928 00:55:55,069 --> 00:55:57,301 Come on, keep going! Come on. 929 00:55:57,302 --> 00:55:58,838 - This is it. - Hammond... 930 00:55:58,838 --> 00:56:00,439 There's the finish line! 931 00:56:00,440 --> 00:56:01,873 Am I going the right way? 932 00:56:01,874 --> 00:56:05,576 More or less. Roll over it. You can do it. 933 00:56:05,577 --> 00:56:08,278 Yes! We have done it. 934 00:56:12,816 --> 00:56:14,684 Have you come far? 935 00:56:22,357 --> 00:56:26,960 A fighting force. An unbelievable fighting force. 936 00:56:28,194 --> 00:56:30,896 We actually managed to complete that course 937 00:56:30,897 --> 00:56:33,365 in nine hours and 48 minutes. 938 00:56:33,366 --> 00:56:38,702 And that's only nine-and-a-half hours slower than the actual soldiers. 939 00:56:38,703 --> 00:56:40,770 Can I just ask, how many times were you shot? 940 00:56:40,771 --> 00:56:42,972 - What, on the run in? - On the way to the embassy. 941 00:56:42,973 --> 00:56:47,242 Er... 17 to the torso, two to the... plum set. 942 00:56:47,242 --> 00:56:49,143 And you lived? 943 00:56:49,144 --> 00:56:51,579 Well, obviously, James, yes, look, I lived. 944 00:56:51,580 --> 00:56:55,784 He did. And on that terrible disappointment, it is time to end. 945 00:56:55,785 --> 00:56:57,784 Yes, it is. Thank you so much for watching. 946 00:56:57,785 --> 00:57:00,252 See you somewhere next week. Goodbye! 947 00:57:03,250 --> 00:57:07,250 Preuzeto sa www.titlovi.com