1 00:00:53,719 --> 00:00:55,121 (GRUNTS) 2 00:00:57,623 --> 00:00:59,358 (CHEERING) 3 00:01:04,530 --> 00:01:06,498 Hello, everybody. 4 00:01:06,565 --> 00:01:08,534 How are you? How are you? 5 00:01:08,600 --> 00:01:11,237 Thank you. Good to see you. Thank you for coming. 6 00:01:12,839 --> 00:01:14,874 (CHEERING AND WHISTLING) 7 00:01:17,343 --> 00:01:19,478 Cold out there! 8 00:01:19,545 --> 00:01:20,913 That is cold. 9 00:01:21,914 --> 00:01:23,983 Hello, everybody! 10 00:01:25,484 --> 00:01:27,086 Hello! 11 00:01:27,153 --> 00:01:31,757 Hello. Welcome to The Grand Tour. Happy Christmas. 12 00:01:31,858 --> 00:01:33,392 This week, we are coming - 13 00:01:33,459 --> 00:01:36,929 if you can see through the drizzle dribbling down the windows - 14 00:01:36,996 --> 00:01:38,364 from Scandinavia. 15 00:01:38,430 --> 00:01:39,565 (CHEERING) 16 00:01:41,233 --> 00:01:42,568 Oh, yeah. 17 00:01:42,634 --> 00:01:43,936 This, of course... 18 00:01:44,003 --> 00:01:47,339 This, of course, is the home of those gloomy dramas 19 00:01:47,406 --> 00:01:50,342 where a weird woman in a jumper solves a murder 20 00:01:50,409 --> 00:01:53,279 by staring at a lake for six hours. 21 00:01:53,345 --> 00:01:54,480 (LAUGHTER) 22 00:01:54,546 --> 00:01:56,548 This will probably be the jolliest programme 23 00:01:56,615 --> 00:01:58,918 to come out of this neck of the woods since... 24 00:01:58,985 --> 00:02:00,319 ... Four Funerals And A Funeral . 25 00:02:00,386 --> 00:02:01,720 JEREMY: Yeah. -(LAUGHTER) 26 00:02:01,888 --> 00:02:04,123 Swedish rom-com that was. Erm... 27 00:02:04,190 --> 00:02:06,025 When Harry Shot Sally . 28 00:02:06,092 --> 00:02:07,393 Oh, a laugh a minute. 29 00:02:07,459 --> 00:02:09,896 The Girl With The Pearl Necklace. No. 30 00:02:09,896 --> 00:02:11,330 (LAUGHTER) 31 00:02:11,397 --> 00:02:14,500 -That's another sort of Scandinavian film. -Really? 32 00:02:14,566 --> 00:02:15,968 Yeah. 33 00:02:18,737 --> 00:02:20,006 Anyway, specifically, 34 00:02:20,072 --> 00:02:23,775 we are deep inside the Arctic Circle in Finland. 35 00:02:23,910 --> 00:02:25,945 (CHEERING) 36 00:02:26,012 --> 00:02:29,181 There you go. And Finland, of course... 37 00:02:29,248 --> 00:02:35,054 Finland, of course, is home to every single racing driver currently... 38 00:02:35,121 --> 00:02:36,655 -What? -What, all of them? 39 00:02:36,722 --> 00:02:37,957 (LAUGHTER) 40 00:02:38,024 --> 00:02:40,792 Well, apart from Nico Rosberg, who is Finnish, 41 00:02:40,927 --> 00:02:43,229 but, for some reason, claims he's German. 42 00:02:43,295 --> 00:02:45,297 (JEERING) 43 00:02:45,364 --> 00:02:47,934 Why does he do that? I have no idea. 44 00:02:48,000 --> 00:02:49,168 Who else is there, then? 45 00:02:49,235 --> 00:02:50,436 Well, there's Mika Salo, 46 00:02:50,502 --> 00:02:52,238 Mika Häkkinen, Kimi Räikkönen. 47 00:02:52,304 --> 00:02:54,974 Hang on, they're just anagrams of the same name, aren't they? 48 00:02:55,041 --> 00:02:56,976 -(LAUGHTER) -Then you've got rallying. 49 00:02:57,043 --> 00:02:59,311 There's Tommi Mäkinen, Timo Mäkinen, 50 00:02:59,378 --> 00:03:01,780 Juha Kankkunen, Ari Vatanen. 51 00:03:01,948 --> 00:03:03,349 More anagrams. 52 00:03:03,415 --> 00:03:04,550 (LAUGHTER) 53 00:03:04,616 --> 00:03:06,318 Kinky Wankinen. 54 00:03:06,385 --> 00:03:07,954 (LAUGHTER) 55 00:03:08,988 --> 00:03:10,656 Manky Pantiden. 56 00:03:10,722 --> 00:03:12,291 (LAUGHS) Really? 57 00:03:12,358 --> 00:03:14,460 I'm getting slightly carried away now. 58 00:03:14,526 --> 00:03:16,728 Seriously, I went on Wikipedia last night 59 00:03:16,795 --> 00:03:19,966 to look for famous Finns who aren't racing drivers. 60 00:03:19,999 --> 00:03:21,300 Put up the list I found. 61 00:03:21,367 --> 00:03:24,036 And I noticed something - they're all men. 62 00:03:24,103 --> 00:03:26,072 -(LAUGHTER) -All of them. 63 00:03:26,138 --> 00:03:28,374 Are there any famous Finnish women? 64 00:03:29,741 --> 00:03:30,876 -(MUTTERING) -Finnish people? 65 00:03:30,977 --> 00:03:32,111 (LAUGHTER) 66 00:03:32,178 --> 00:03:35,014 Nobody thinks so. They're all... (GRUNTS) 67 00:03:35,081 --> 00:03:36,348 I know why, OK? 68 00:03:36,415 --> 00:03:40,052 It's because all Finnish women, at the age of 19, 69 00:03:40,119 --> 00:03:41,720 move to England to be au pairs. 70 00:03:41,787 --> 00:03:43,455 (LAUGHTER) 71 00:03:43,522 --> 00:03:46,358 I actually had three Finnish au pairs over the years for my children. 72 00:03:46,425 --> 00:03:48,127 -Did you? -Yeah. It was always funny. 73 00:03:48,194 --> 00:03:50,796 You'd go to Heathrow airport to pick up your new au pair, 74 00:03:50,862 --> 00:03:54,900 and there'd always be a row of 30-something fathers waiting at the gate 75 00:03:55,001 --> 00:03:58,037 for their Scandinavian au pair to come out. 76 00:03:58,104 --> 00:03:59,405 (LAUGHTER) 77 00:03:59,471 --> 00:04:01,507 And there was one year I've never forgotten. 78 00:04:01,573 --> 00:04:05,211 This huge moose lumbered out of the door, 79 00:04:05,277 --> 00:04:09,748 and the man next to me looked at his piece of paper and went, "Oh, for God's sake!" 80 00:04:09,815 --> 00:04:11,150 (LAUGHTER) 81 00:04:12,851 --> 00:04:14,053 That's not good. 82 00:04:18,424 --> 00:04:20,659 -Shall we get on with the show? -Yes, good idea. 83 00:04:20,726 --> 00:04:25,164 Because tonight in our television programme about cars... 84 00:04:25,231 --> 00:04:27,133 I eat some cheddar. 85 00:04:29,201 --> 00:04:31,637 Richard says he doesn't want any. 86 00:04:31,703 --> 00:04:33,739 I don't want cheese. 87 00:04:33,805 --> 00:04:39,311 And James compares a Ford GT40 to a Ferrari P3. 88 00:04:39,378 --> 00:04:41,880 Avanti! 89 00:04:41,947 --> 00:04:44,750 But first, if you are watching this in America, 90 00:04:44,816 --> 00:04:46,518 you may be amazed to hear 91 00:04:46,585 --> 00:04:51,723 that the Ford Mustang has never been sold, officially, in the UK. 92 00:04:51,790 --> 00:04:54,460 Well, until now, because Ford has now decided 93 00:04:54,526 --> 00:04:57,563 that the latest Mustang will be sold in the UK 94 00:04:57,629 --> 00:05:00,732 with a V8 engine and right-hand drive. 95 00:05:00,799 --> 00:05:05,171 Mm, and this has made our other resident American very happy. 96 00:05:05,237 --> 00:05:07,273 He was so excited, in fact, 97 00:05:07,339 --> 00:05:09,975 that when the first right-hand-drive Mustang 98 00:05:10,076 --> 00:05:11,977 arrived at the docks in the UK, 99 00:05:12,078 --> 00:05:14,380 he was actually there to meet it. 100 00:05:14,446 --> 00:05:16,382 (LAUGHTER) 101 00:05:36,168 --> 00:05:38,104 It'll be here any minute. 102 00:05:49,515 --> 00:05:52,017 That is it. Are we ready? 103 00:05:52,118 --> 00:05:55,521 This is the moment. It's touched down! 104 00:05:55,587 --> 00:05:56,522 Go, go, go! 105 00:05:56,588 --> 00:05:58,657 * New World Symphony (Dvorak) 106 00:06:04,163 --> 00:06:06,865 Look, it's a bit gloomy, isn't it? 107 00:06:06,932 --> 00:06:10,469 It's not very welcoming. Have you got anything more upbeat? 108 00:06:10,536 --> 00:06:14,306 * When The Saints Go Marching In 109 00:06:14,373 --> 00:06:16,142 Forget it! Forget it! Forget it! 110 00:06:16,208 --> 00:06:18,277 -(BAND STOPS PLAYING) -Forget it. 111 00:06:21,147 --> 00:06:22,681 (GASPS) 112 00:06:22,748 --> 00:06:25,284 I'm so excited, my tinkle is fizzing. 113 00:06:29,155 --> 00:06:30,756 (ENGINE REVS) 114 00:06:30,822 --> 00:06:32,524 (LAUGHS) 115 00:06:32,591 --> 00:06:33,459 Oh, yeah! 116 00:06:33,525 --> 00:06:35,627 * National Anthem of USSR 117 00:06:39,498 --> 00:06:41,533 Oh. Sorry about that. 118 00:06:41,600 --> 00:06:43,635 We really are useless over here. 119 00:06:43,702 --> 00:06:46,672 It's one of the reasons we needed your help in the war. 120 00:06:50,008 --> 00:06:51,577 I decided that, first of all, 121 00:06:51,643 --> 00:06:53,879 I'd show the new Mustang around, 122 00:06:53,945 --> 00:06:56,215 so I headed for London... 123 00:06:56,282 --> 00:06:57,816 which is the capital city. 124 00:07:17,669 --> 00:07:20,372 Ah, now, this is Tower Bridge. 125 00:07:20,439 --> 00:07:23,442 Interesting. It's very, very old. 126 00:07:23,509 --> 00:07:25,777 But it folds completely in half 127 00:07:25,844 --> 00:07:28,747 so that, in the old days, the horses could go through. 128 00:07:32,384 --> 00:07:34,953 Now, that's the Houses of Parliament, 129 00:07:35,020 --> 00:07:38,457 which are a series of houses in which we keep all our idiots. 130 00:07:38,524 --> 00:07:42,127 That clock thing, that's Big Ben. 131 00:07:42,228 --> 00:07:46,332 I know it's not what you call big, but... but we couldn't just call it Ben. 132 00:07:48,334 --> 00:07:51,002 And that is the Cenotaph, 133 00:07:51,069 --> 00:07:54,806 where we remember those who died fighting for us. 134 00:07:56,141 --> 00:07:58,244 Slowing down a bit here. 135 00:07:58,310 --> 00:07:59,645 Show some respect. 136 00:08:02,581 --> 00:08:05,451 No idea what that is. It wasn't here this morning. 137 00:08:07,719 --> 00:08:10,055 A cyclist, you want to be careful of those. 138 00:08:10,121 --> 00:08:12,391 Small but very angry creatures. 139 00:08:14,893 --> 00:08:16,962 That's the army. 140 00:08:17,028 --> 00:08:19,298 They're the ones who shot at your White House. 141 00:08:19,365 --> 00:08:20,599 Sorry about that. 142 00:08:21,767 --> 00:08:24,336 Having seen all of the sights, 143 00:08:24,403 --> 00:08:26,438 we headed out of town 144 00:08:26,505 --> 00:08:28,274 so I could do this. 145 00:08:28,340 --> 00:08:30,276 (ENGINE THRUMS) 146 00:08:32,778 --> 00:08:34,280 There it is. 147 00:08:34,280 --> 00:08:38,517 That is the soundtrack that Britain has been missing for 51 years - 148 00:08:38,584 --> 00:08:40,919 real American V8 muscle. 149 00:08:44,990 --> 00:08:48,660 We just don't make cars like this on our side of the pond. 150 00:08:48,727 --> 00:08:52,498 All that lazy-but-determined torque. 151 00:08:52,564 --> 00:08:56,502 Squeeze the throttle in any gear at any speed... 152 00:08:56,568 --> 00:08:59,037 ...and there's an inevitability to the way it moves off. 153 00:08:59,104 --> 00:09:02,308 It's like arm wrestling a solar system - you're gonna lose. 154 00:09:12,951 --> 00:09:14,520 It is weird... 155 00:09:14,586 --> 00:09:17,623 driving a Mustang from this side. 156 00:09:17,689 --> 00:09:19,391 It's like suddenly changing your mind 157 00:09:19,458 --> 00:09:22,494 after 50 years of marriage and sleeping on the other side of the bed. 158 00:09:24,463 --> 00:09:26,832 It's also weird driving a car with a big V8, 159 00:09:26,898 --> 00:09:28,967 reversing camera, air-conditioned seats, 160 00:09:29,034 --> 00:09:33,805 rain-sensing wipers that you can buy for £37,000. 161 00:09:33,872 --> 00:09:37,343 That's half of what you'd pay for a BMW M4. Half. 162 00:09:40,612 --> 00:09:42,781 Once we were in the countryside proper, 163 00:09:42,848 --> 00:09:45,351 I continued my sightseeing tour. 164 00:09:46,785 --> 00:09:49,555 Look, I've drawn your badge on a hill. 165 00:09:56,662 --> 00:09:57,863 Jeremy did that one. 166 00:10:01,700 --> 00:10:03,435 Sorry. 167 00:10:05,837 --> 00:10:08,774 Eventually, we arrived at Stonehenge. 168 00:10:11,276 --> 00:10:14,045 That, you'll be amazed to learn, 169 00:10:14,112 --> 00:10:16,081 is an ancient calendar. 170 00:10:17,916 --> 00:10:20,118 Or a clock. Or a church. 171 00:10:20,185 --> 00:10:24,856 My tour of Britain was then interrupted by an unwelcome arrival. 172 00:10:24,923 --> 00:10:27,058 (GROANS) 173 00:10:27,125 --> 00:10:28,360 What are you doing here? 174 00:10:28,427 --> 00:10:31,262 Well, I have come to remind you - 175 00:10:31,329 --> 00:10:33,098 cos you've obviously forgotten, 176 00:10:33,164 --> 00:10:34,566 cos you're too giddy - 177 00:10:34,633 --> 00:10:37,703 that we have no need for the Mustang in Britain. 178 00:10:37,769 --> 00:10:39,871 Because if you want to spend, 179 00:10:39,938 --> 00:10:43,041 what, £30,000-£35,000 on a fast Ford, 180 00:10:43,108 --> 00:10:46,578 you'd buy a Focus RS, cos that was designed for here. 181 00:10:46,645 --> 00:10:49,214 No, you'd settle for that in the UK 182 00:10:49,280 --> 00:10:52,017 because you couldn't buy this, but now you can. 183 00:10:52,083 --> 00:10:53,419 That is the point. 184 00:10:53,485 --> 00:10:55,421 Would you wear chaps? 185 00:10:55,487 --> 00:10:57,623 No, because we have trousers. 186 00:10:57,689 --> 00:10:59,658 What about cowboy... Oh, you are. Cowboy boots. 187 00:10:59,725 --> 00:11:01,393 Well, it's appropriate. I'm welcoming... 188 00:11:01,460 --> 00:11:05,063 Listen, I don't want everything from America, I just want the Mustang. 189 00:11:05,130 --> 00:11:06,297 -Stupid. -No, America-- 190 00:11:06,432 --> 00:11:07,966 It wasn't designed for here. 191 00:11:08,033 --> 00:11:10,436 -Would you wear a Stetson? -Well, no. 192 00:11:10,436 --> 00:11:12,438 "It's cold out, I'll wear a Stetson." 193 00:11:12,438 --> 00:11:14,339 No! You wear a bobble hat. 194 00:11:14,440 --> 00:11:16,074 That's a bobble hat. 195 00:11:16,141 --> 00:11:17,976 Oh! No, hang on. 196 00:11:19,511 --> 00:11:21,112 -I've just realised. -What? 197 00:11:21,179 --> 00:11:23,715 Erm... I-I don't want to talk to you any more. 198 00:11:36,962 --> 00:11:38,830 (CHEERING) 199 00:11:41,900 --> 00:11:43,469 Anyway... 200 00:11:43,535 --> 00:11:47,105 Anyway, we shall pick that up later on. 201 00:11:47,172 --> 00:11:49,675 But right now it's time to drop it a cog 202 00:11:49,741 --> 00:11:53,479 and hook a left into Conversation Street. 203 00:11:53,479 --> 00:11:55,481 (MELLOW JAZZ) 204 00:11:58,383 --> 00:11:59,651 (LAUGHTER) 205 00:12:02,220 --> 00:12:05,491 -Serious. It's serious. -It is serious stuff, this. 206 00:12:06,825 --> 00:12:09,060 Now, look, in Britain we are always being told 207 00:12:09,127 --> 00:12:11,530 that the Scandinavians are brilliant at driving, 208 00:12:11,597 --> 00:12:15,366 and that's because they would be, because they have to deal with all that snow. 209 00:12:15,501 --> 00:12:19,505 Mm, they're brilliant because what they do most of all is crash. 210 00:12:19,571 --> 00:12:21,372 Well, you're absolutely right, as it turns out, 211 00:12:21,507 --> 00:12:24,242 cos I've got some interesting statistics here. Erm... 212 00:12:24,309 --> 00:12:28,814 In Britain, 1.2% of accidents result in fatalities. 213 00:12:28,880 --> 00:12:31,517 Here, I'm afraid, it's 5.1%. 214 00:12:31,583 --> 00:12:33,519 Yeah, and it's not just the Finns, either, 215 00:12:33,519 --> 00:12:35,521 if I may be so bold. 216 00:12:35,521 --> 00:12:37,989 Our Senior International Producer - 217 00:12:38,056 --> 00:12:39,525 that's his job title - 218 00:12:39,558 --> 00:12:41,292 came over to Finland the other day, 219 00:12:41,359 --> 00:12:43,428 rented himself a BMW at the airport - 220 00:12:43,529 --> 00:12:45,764 not a Ford or an Opel, you'll note, a BMW - 221 00:12:45,831 --> 00:12:48,066 and on his way to the location here, 222 00:12:48,133 --> 00:12:49,400 this happened. 223 00:12:49,535 --> 00:12:51,603 -(LAUGHTER) RICHARD: He did! He did! 224 00:12:51,670 --> 00:12:53,972 When I say he's our Senior International Producer, 225 00:12:54,039 --> 00:12:56,542 he's now our Junior International Producer. 226 00:12:56,575 --> 00:12:59,177 -Our Junior Local Producer. -Yeah. 227 00:12:59,244 --> 00:13:01,947 Very local. Specifically, the stationery cupboard. 228 00:13:02,013 --> 00:13:04,583 -He can produce that. -That's all he's in charge of. 229 00:13:04,650 --> 00:13:06,552 How did he do that?! 230 00:13:06,552 --> 00:13:09,955 The thing is, what I don't understand is how the Finns manage to go fast enough 231 00:13:10,021 --> 00:13:12,023 to have a crash of any sort at all, 232 00:13:12,090 --> 00:13:15,293 because the speeding fines here are insane. 233 00:13:15,360 --> 00:13:17,362 They're means tested, 234 00:13:17,428 --> 00:13:19,230 which means a guy here recently 235 00:13:19,297 --> 00:13:21,967 was caught doing 49mph through a 30 zone 236 00:13:22,033 --> 00:13:26,805 and he was fined 112,000 euros. 237 00:13:26,872 --> 00:13:28,740 -That's a speeding fine! -(AUDIENCE GASPS) 238 00:13:28,807 --> 00:13:30,709 Are they really that high in Finland? 239 00:13:30,776 --> 00:13:32,678 -(AUDIENCE CONCUR) -They are? 240 00:13:32,744 --> 00:13:34,045 A hundred and twelve... 241 00:13:34,112 --> 00:13:35,446 112,000. 242 00:13:35,581 --> 00:13:38,183 -Imagine getting that in the post! -Well, it's interesting. 243 00:13:38,249 --> 00:13:41,119 Actually, there was a Finnish minister recently said 244 00:13:41,186 --> 00:13:43,889 that the government needs those speeding fines 245 00:13:43,955 --> 00:13:46,224 to balance the books, they said. 246 00:13:46,291 --> 00:13:49,695 They actually said, "Speeding is good for the country." 247 00:13:49,761 --> 00:13:52,063 -(LAUGHTER) -That is actually what... 248 00:13:52,130 --> 00:13:53,865 JEREMY: Because it is. Every country. 249 00:13:53,932 --> 00:13:57,102 RICHARD: Right. We should adopt that. 250 00:13:57,168 --> 00:13:59,971 -Speeding is good for you. -It's your social duty. 251 00:14:00,038 --> 00:14:02,207 -A bit more conversation for you. -Oh, good! 252 00:14:02,273 --> 00:14:03,775 (LAUGHTER) 253 00:14:03,842 --> 00:14:06,377 I think, with the exception of Rolls-Royce, 254 00:14:06,444 --> 00:14:10,448 Volvo now make the best car interiors of anybody. 255 00:14:10,515 --> 00:14:11,983 (AUDIENCE CALLING OUT) 256 00:14:12,050 --> 00:14:14,085 They do. They're very, very good. 257 00:14:14,152 --> 00:14:16,121 I don't like to, but I agree with you. 258 00:14:16,187 --> 00:14:19,858 because I went in the new S90 the other day, and the interior is superb. 259 00:14:19,925 --> 00:14:22,393 -We've got a picture of it here. -Yes, that one. 260 00:14:22,460 --> 00:14:24,095 JEREMY: They use pale colours. 261 00:14:24,162 --> 00:14:26,197 They've got pale-coloured seats, pale-coloured carpets, pale wood, 262 00:14:26,264 --> 00:14:29,100 and that makes it feel light and airy and spacious. 263 00:14:29,167 --> 00:14:31,837 The only problem is that in one of those 264 00:14:31,903 --> 00:14:35,173 you couldn't enjoy a chocolate Magnum ice cream. 265 00:14:35,240 --> 00:14:36,174 (LAUGHTER) 266 00:14:36,241 --> 00:14:38,276 It's all right, I don't eat ice cream. 267 00:14:38,343 --> 00:14:40,345 It's something to do with being straight. 268 00:14:43,281 --> 00:14:44,650 What? What? 269 00:14:44,683 --> 00:14:46,017 Why are you applauding him? 270 00:14:48,654 --> 00:14:49,788 What do you mean? 271 00:14:49,855 --> 00:14:52,157 Are you saying everyone who likes ice...? 272 00:14:52,223 --> 00:14:54,325 Ice cream is a bit, you know.... 273 00:14:54,392 --> 00:14:56,728 You're saying all children are homosexual? 274 00:14:56,795 --> 00:14:58,063 -No, but... -(LAUGHTER) 275 00:14:58,129 --> 00:14:59,865 There's nothing wrong with it, 276 00:14:59,931 --> 00:15:02,801 but a grown man eating an ice cream, you know, it's a bit... 277 00:15:02,868 --> 00:15:04,535 it's that way rather than that way. 278 00:15:04,670 --> 00:15:05,871 -(LAUGHTER) -It is... 279 00:15:05,937 --> 00:15:08,707 Welcome to the inside of Richard Hammond's head. 280 00:15:08,774 --> 00:15:10,809 I'm right. I can't believe you can't see that. 281 00:15:10,876 --> 00:15:12,210 It's easy. It's in front of you. 282 00:15:12,277 --> 00:15:15,180 You could enjoy a 99 in there. 283 00:15:15,246 --> 00:15:17,115 -You mean a 69? -No... 284 00:15:17,182 --> 00:15:19,851 Ninety-nine. But you couldn't have the chocolate thingy. 285 00:15:19,918 --> 00:15:22,153 -My case rests! -No, the chocolate thing! 286 00:15:22,220 --> 00:15:24,222 -Exactly! -You know what I mean. 287 00:15:24,289 --> 00:15:26,692 No, but if you had that Volvo, 288 00:15:26,758 --> 00:15:28,093 you could have a white magnum... 289 00:15:28,159 --> 00:15:29,861 JEREMY: True. -...or a Milky Bar. 290 00:15:29,928 --> 00:15:32,497 Yeah, but not a Double Decker. 291 00:15:32,563 --> 00:15:33,899 Well, a Flake is worse. 292 00:15:33,965 --> 00:15:36,034 -No, Double Decker's worse. -(LAUGHTER) 293 00:15:36,101 --> 00:15:37,235 Double Decker... 294 00:15:37,302 --> 00:15:39,404 Do you all know what I mean by the Double Decker? 295 00:15:39,470 --> 00:15:42,573 It is unique among chocolate confectionery items. 296 00:15:42,708 --> 00:15:44,475 Take a bite as you're driving along, 297 00:15:44,542 --> 00:15:46,712 and a bit about this big, OK, 298 00:15:46,778 --> 00:15:48,346 silently breaks away... 299 00:15:49,614 --> 00:15:51,616 ...goes down between your legs 300 00:15:51,717 --> 00:15:53,451 and melts. 301 00:15:53,518 --> 00:15:54,986 So when you get out, 302 00:15:55,053 --> 00:15:57,823 everybody thinks you've had some kind of trouser accident. 303 00:15:57,889 --> 00:16:01,259 This big brown stain right... 304 00:16:01,326 --> 00:16:04,195 -I know what you mean. -It does happen. 305 00:16:04,262 --> 00:16:05,831 A Flake is worse. 306 00:16:05,897 --> 00:16:07,498 No, it just isn't! 307 00:16:07,565 --> 00:16:10,335 A Flake is advertised as "the crumbliest, flakiest chocolate". 308 00:16:10,401 --> 00:16:13,204 -It is worse. -This is a hot topic on Conversation Street. 309 00:16:13,271 --> 00:16:14,239 It is! 310 00:16:14,305 --> 00:16:16,307 I think we should settle it here and now. 311 00:16:16,374 --> 00:16:18,576 I'm going to go into our travelling box. 312 00:16:18,643 --> 00:16:19,845 (CHEERING) 313 00:16:22,447 --> 00:16:25,583 Our travelling box of chocolate confectionery, and I'm going to... 314 00:16:25,650 --> 00:16:27,552 Let's settle it with a competition, yes? 315 00:16:27,618 --> 00:16:29,020 I'm gonna give you James's Flake 316 00:16:29,087 --> 00:16:30,922 and you the Double Decker. 317 00:16:30,989 --> 00:16:35,193 I'll turn that over, so then you'll see how much spills off as I eat the Flake. 318 00:16:35,260 --> 00:16:37,262 -Not much. Right, ready? -This is scientific. 319 00:16:37,328 --> 00:16:38,363 (LAUGHTER) 320 00:16:38,429 --> 00:16:40,565 Here we go. Oh. Some of it's already crum... 321 00:16:40,631 --> 00:16:43,068 This is cheating, this one. 322 00:16:43,134 --> 00:16:44,803 RICHARD: OK, no, clear away the debris. 323 00:16:44,870 --> 00:16:46,772 JEREMY: No, I need to... Jesus! 324 00:16:46,772 --> 00:16:50,175 -That's part of eating it! -It isn't part of eating it! I haven't even begun. 325 00:16:50,241 --> 00:16:52,177 -But you've got to unwrap it. -Ssh! 326 00:16:52,243 --> 00:16:53,144 Cheat. 327 00:16:53,211 --> 00:16:55,680 * Only the crumbliest * 328 00:16:55,781 --> 00:16:57,382 * Flakiest chocolate * 329 00:16:57,448 --> 00:16:59,317 -Oh, God. * Tastes like choc... * 330 00:16:59,384 --> 00:17:01,552 -What? -Jeremy, you know that advert? 331 00:17:01,619 --> 00:17:03,789 -Girl in... -(LAUGHTER) 332 00:17:03,822 --> 00:17:07,826 Girl in the the field of poppies - we're not seeing that right now. 333 00:17:07,893 --> 00:17:09,394 -I am. -I'm not. 334 00:17:09,460 --> 00:17:10,695 Right, ready? Watch this. 335 00:17:10,796 --> 00:17:12,798 RICHARD: He's going in. First bite. 336 00:17:12,798 --> 00:17:14,565 Oh, it's a big fall of chocolate! 337 00:17:14,632 --> 00:17:16,835 JEREMY: Mm. -It's a heavy sprinkling, that. 338 00:17:16,902 --> 00:17:18,904 That is just a light dusting of chocolate. 339 00:17:18,970 --> 00:17:20,806 -A light dusting, yeah, OK. -Right, James May. 340 00:17:20,839 --> 00:17:25,510 Moving over to James May and his Double Decker. This is exciting, isn't it? 341 00:17:25,576 --> 00:17:29,014 -This is a great car programme. -Groundbreaking stuff, yeah. 342 00:17:29,080 --> 00:17:31,282 -Quiet, please. -I can't believe... 343 00:17:31,349 --> 00:17:34,719 -I can't believe this hasn't been done before. -(LAUGHTER) 344 00:17:34,820 --> 00:17:36,822 He's going in. He's taking a bite. 345 00:17:38,456 --> 00:17:40,691 His poor old gnash... His teeth! 346 00:17:40,826 --> 00:17:42,093 -Oh! -(AUDIENCE GASPS) 347 00:17:42,160 --> 00:17:45,997 It's a catastrophic fall! The clear winner... 348 00:17:46,064 --> 00:17:50,468 The Double Decker is worse than the Flake. 349 00:17:50,535 --> 00:17:53,504 There's the Flake. There's the Double Decker. 350 00:17:53,571 --> 00:17:56,241 So, there we are. Using science, we have now established... 351 00:17:56,307 --> 00:17:59,677 ...if you've got a Volvo, don't have a Double Decker. 352 00:17:59,744 --> 00:18:01,012 -Ever. -(LAUGHTER) 353 00:18:01,079 --> 00:18:03,548 Or an ice cream, because he... Oh, no, forget it. 354 00:18:03,614 --> 00:18:07,652 Let's move a little further along Conversation Street, shall we? 355 00:18:07,718 --> 00:18:09,520 Erm... A few weeks ago, Amazon, 356 00:18:09,587 --> 00:18:12,858 they ran an advert for our show, and we're rather pleased with it. 357 00:18:12,891 --> 00:18:14,125 See, it's got everything in. 358 00:18:14,192 --> 00:18:16,327 -Yeah, the sense of travel. -Logo. 359 00:18:16,394 --> 00:18:18,763 -And there's even the goat. -Yeah, no, that's perfect. 360 00:18:18,864 --> 00:18:22,700 -Everything you need there. -All you need for the advert. It's on the screen. 361 00:18:22,767 --> 00:18:24,335 -It's good, isn't it? -(LAUGHTER) 362 00:18:24,402 --> 00:18:28,773 Yeah. All the essentials are there. Everything you need. 363 00:18:28,874 --> 00:18:30,241 Everything you need to see. 364 00:18:32,377 --> 00:18:34,479 -(RICHARD LAUGHS) JEREMY: Actually... 365 00:18:34,545 --> 00:18:35,680 All the important stuff. 366 00:18:35,746 --> 00:18:37,348 Hammond, I'm sorry to do this, 367 00:18:37,415 --> 00:18:40,351 but before the show launched, Amazon did another advert, OK, 368 00:18:40,418 --> 00:18:43,354 which somebody sent to me on a tweet, which I screen grabbed, 369 00:18:43,421 --> 00:18:46,291 so the quality's not good, but I have brought it along. 370 00:18:46,357 --> 00:18:47,525 Here it is. 371 00:18:47,592 --> 00:18:48,626 Oh, for God's sake! 372 00:18:48,693 --> 00:18:50,095 (LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE) 373 00:18:53,231 --> 00:18:54,265 (GROANS) 374 00:18:54,332 --> 00:18:58,136 I like their marketing department a lot. 375 00:18:58,203 --> 00:18:59,971 I think that's enough Conversation Street, 376 00:19:00,038 --> 00:19:01,572 so let's get back to our film. 377 00:19:01,639 --> 00:19:04,976 Yes. Earlier on, I was in the right-hand-drive Ford Mustang, 378 00:19:05,043 --> 00:19:07,045 showing it the sights around our country. 379 00:19:07,112 --> 00:19:08,914 Unfortunately, he turned up 380 00:19:08,914 --> 00:19:13,118 and tried to argue that the similarly priced Ford Focus was a better bet. 381 00:19:13,184 --> 00:19:18,924 -Yeah, I did do that. -I responded by driving off and refusing to talk to you. 382 00:19:18,957 --> 00:19:20,291 A bit rudely, I thought. 383 00:19:26,431 --> 00:19:29,534 I'm sorry, this is my film, my tour of England, 384 00:19:29,600 --> 00:19:32,137 and I didn't want him spoiling it. 385 00:19:36,641 --> 00:19:37,943 This thing's bloody awesome. 386 00:19:40,511 --> 00:19:41,512 Listen to that bellow. 387 00:19:41,579 --> 00:19:43,714 This thing squats on its haunches. 388 00:19:43,781 --> 00:19:46,351 This is what it's built to do. 389 00:19:46,417 --> 00:19:52,390 Every crackle, pop and bang is just connected to every synapse and sinew in me. 390 00:19:55,393 --> 00:19:56,962 Oh, no. 391 00:20:02,267 --> 00:20:05,403 This is like a first date for me, and on a first date, 392 00:20:05,470 --> 00:20:09,307 you don't want a fat, balding uncle tagging along. 393 00:20:10,976 --> 00:20:13,911 So what I'm gonna do now... is lose him. 394 00:20:18,216 --> 00:20:20,918 It's Hammer Time! Shock and awe! 395 00:20:28,293 --> 00:20:30,361 It's Bond versus Bourne. 396 00:20:34,099 --> 00:20:35,433 (HORNS BLARING) 397 00:20:38,136 --> 00:20:42,007 He's got five litres. I've only got 2.3. 398 00:20:42,073 --> 00:20:45,110 Is he going twice as fast? No, he is not. 399 00:20:50,515 --> 00:20:53,351 Corner coming up. There's no need to panic any more in a Mustang, 400 00:20:53,418 --> 00:20:55,286 because, for the first time, 401 00:20:55,353 --> 00:20:57,688 the Mustang has independent rear suspension. 402 00:21:03,861 --> 00:21:05,196 Ooh! (LAUGHS) 403 00:21:07,198 --> 00:21:11,402 The cornering speeds this thing can achieve... beggar belief. 404 00:21:20,778 --> 00:21:22,047 (CHUCKLES) 405 00:21:22,113 --> 00:21:24,415 How does it grip that well?! 406 00:21:28,619 --> 00:21:31,956 (LAUGHS) I'm in a car chase in a Mustang. 407 00:21:32,057 --> 00:21:33,424 I am Steve McQueen. 408 00:21:39,464 --> 00:21:41,166 Try that on. 409 00:21:44,835 --> 00:21:46,171 I've got it in Sport Mode, 410 00:21:46,237 --> 00:21:48,573 which makes the exhaust pop and bang. 411 00:21:48,639 --> 00:21:49,640 (POPPING) 412 00:21:51,076 --> 00:21:52,710 Woohoo! Mine! (LAUGHS) 413 00:21:58,083 --> 00:21:59,384 RICHARD: Oh, my God! 414 00:22:00,751 --> 00:22:02,620 Flat out, yeah. 415 00:22:04,789 --> 00:22:06,891 And it still grips! 416 00:22:06,957 --> 00:22:10,395 What is the point of traction control on this thing? 417 00:22:10,461 --> 00:22:13,564 It's like putting a nymphomania control on a nun. 418 00:22:24,409 --> 00:22:26,411 Oh, God! 419 00:22:32,683 --> 00:22:33,818 (HORN BLARES) 420 00:22:40,225 --> 00:22:42,427 Where's he gone? 421 00:22:44,028 --> 00:22:47,132 How did he do that? How did he get away from me 422 00:22:47,198 --> 00:22:49,967 in something from the 18th century? 423 00:22:50,034 --> 00:22:51,602 Especially when I'm driving 424 00:22:51,669 --> 00:22:56,006 what is basically a turbocharged barnacle. 425 00:22:56,141 --> 00:23:01,179 This has the most sophisticated four-wheel-drive system 426 00:23:01,246 --> 00:23:02,713 fitted to any car. 427 00:23:05,283 --> 00:23:08,319 Not even a Nissan GTR could live with this. 428 00:23:13,057 --> 00:23:15,660 The Mustang, well, that's for cruising down 429 00:23:15,726 --> 00:23:19,730 the Pacific Coast Highway, listening to Don Henley. 430 00:23:19,797 --> 00:23:22,733 This is for storming up the Stelvio Pass, 431 00:23:22,800 --> 00:23:24,435 listening to the Clash. 432 00:23:27,805 --> 00:23:31,609 But while it's a grippy, technological masterpiece, 433 00:23:31,676 --> 00:23:37,081 it still has the blue-collar character of its ancestors. 434 00:23:37,182 --> 00:23:42,420 In many ways, this reminds me of the old Escort Cosworth, and that was a great car. 435 00:23:42,487 --> 00:23:45,223 I actually had one in the '90s. I called it Gary. 436 00:23:45,290 --> 00:23:49,694 It started every morning and it always went, "Do you want some?!" 437 00:23:49,760 --> 00:23:52,263 It was just John Terry, really, with windscreen wipers. 438 00:23:55,900 --> 00:23:58,403 RICHARD: Meanwhile, having got rid of the ape, 439 00:23:58,469 --> 00:24:01,439 I was back on my sightseeing tour. 440 00:24:01,506 --> 00:24:04,242 This is our Cheddar Gorge. 441 00:24:05,643 --> 00:24:08,313 Obviously it's not as big as your gorge. 442 00:24:08,379 --> 00:24:10,215 The Grand Canyon is bigger. 443 00:24:10,281 --> 00:24:13,551 Well, it's longer and deeper... and wider. 444 00:24:13,618 --> 00:24:16,254 Mm. But it doesn't have any cheese in it. 445 00:24:16,321 --> 00:24:17,988 Why can't you just leave me alone? 446 00:24:18,055 --> 00:24:20,958 I'm just saying, everything in America comes with cheese, 447 00:24:21,025 --> 00:24:22,627 apart from the Grand Canyon. 448 00:24:22,693 --> 00:24:26,397 Whereas this canyon does come with cheese, and it's delicious. 449 00:24:26,464 --> 00:24:28,098 -Here, have some. -I don't want cheese. 450 00:24:28,233 --> 00:24:30,701 -It's better than Monterey Jack in a tube. -You're ruining this! 451 00:24:30,768 --> 00:24:33,538 No, you are, because you are telling everyone 452 00:24:33,604 --> 00:24:38,075 that the Mustang is better than the Focus. 453 00:24:38,142 --> 00:24:39,977 -Well, it is. -It isn't. 454 00:24:40,044 --> 00:24:42,713 -It is. -No, it isn't. 455 00:24:42,780 --> 00:24:45,783 Look, I'm not saying this is perfect, cos it isn't. 456 00:24:45,850 --> 00:24:49,019 There's a vertical choppiness to the ride, which is annoying. 457 00:24:49,086 --> 00:24:51,989 If you put your phone in the phone holder in front of the gear lever 458 00:24:52,056 --> 00:24:54,392 and then accelerate, it shoots under the seat. 459 00:24:54,459 --> 00:24:55,593 You never see it again. 460 00:24:55,660 --> 00:24:57,562 Petrol tank, way too small. 461 00:24:57,628 --> 00:25:01,266 -And the styling is a bit... yobbish. -A bit?! 462 00:25:01,266 --> 00:25:02,767 But, Hammond, look at this. 463 00:25:05,803 --> 00:25:07,638 Oh, yeah, you're right. 464 00:25:07,705 --> 00:25:11,576 Half a century of Mustang history, heritage and pride, 465 00:25:11,642 --> 00:25:16,381 but it hasn't got a small plastic strip on the door in case you're a bit clumsy. 466 00:25:16,447 --> 00:25:20,017 No, it's brilliant, that. And... this is faster. 467 00:25:20,084 --> 00:25:22,152 Well, no, it isn't. 468 00:25:22,287 --> 00:25:25,089 -It is. -No, it isn't. 469 00:25:25,155 --> 00:25:27,625 -It is. -It isn't. 470 00:25:27,692 --> 00:25:31,296 RICHARD: At this point, I decided to abandon my tour 471 00:25:31,329 --> 00:25:34,299 and head for the nearest airfield... 472 00:25:34,365 --> 00:25:36,367 ...to teach Clarkson a lesson. 473 00:25:41,606 --> 00:25:44,342 Right, I've got 410 horsepower - 474 00:25:44,409 --> 00:25:46,010 that's 100 more than him. 475 00:25:46,076 --> 00:25:48,479 But there's something else on here that's missing on his Focus, 476 00:25:48,546 --> 00:25:50,848 and it's this - "line lock". 477 00:25:50,915 --> 00:25:54,184 So, engage it. Press OK to initialise. 478 00:25:54,319 --> 00:25:56,487 "Initialising. Initialising complete. 479 00:25:56,554 --> 00:25:58,589 Firmly apply and hold brake to engage. 480 00:25:58,656 --> 00:26:01,058 Engaged. Press OK to begin." 481 00:26:01,125 --> 00:26:03,461 (REVVING) 482 00:26:03,528 --> 00:26:06,897 What that's doing is locking the front brakes, 483 00:26:06,964 --> 00:26:09,734 so I can warm up my tyres. 484 00:26:09,800 --> 00:26:15,005 Hm. That is an ideal feature for people who wake up in the morning and think, 485 00:26:15,072 --> 00:26:17,875 "Do you know, I've got too much tread on my tyres." 486 00:26:24,515 --> 00:26:26,884 Yeah! I'm doing that automatically! 487 00:26:34,224 --> 00:26:36,661 What a moron. 488 00:26:36,727 --> 00:26:38,429 With my tyres warmed up, 489 00:26:38,496 --> 00:26:40,831 I took my place on the start line. 490 00:26:44,502 --> 00:26:48,005 Right, race mode, launch control, 491 00:26:48,072 --> 00:26:51,175 over-boost facility on the turbocharger, 492 00:26:51,241 --> 00:26:56,246 four-wheel-drive, and a man with lightning reactions at the wheel. 493 00:26:56,381 --> 00:27:00,918 This car is going to boing off the line like a spring lamb. 494 00:27:03,020 --> 00:27:06,256 Launch control, first gear, and we're ready to go. 495 00:27:06,391 --> 00:27:08,092 (REVVING) 496 00:27:24,308 --> 00:27:27,011 Oh, he's away first. 497 00:27:27,077 --> 00:27:29,980 The most incredible launch control in the world! 498 00:27:32,182 --> 00:27:34,218 Come on! 499 00:27:34,284 --> 00:27:36,887 Come on, Jeremy. Come on. You're winning. 500 00:27:38,423 --> 00:27:40,224 RICHARD: Oh, reeling him in! 501 00:27:40,290 --> 00:27:41,959 (LAUGHS) 502 00:27:44,429 --> 00:27:45,830 (LAUGHS) 503 00:27:47,898 --> 00:27:51,235 No, no, no! That's simply impossible! 504 00:27:51,301 --> 00:27:53,438 Well, bless him for trying. 505 00:27:57,675 --> 00:28:01,045 Things I don't want to see right now - number one, him. 506 00:28:01,111 --> 00:28:02,913 So er... I won, then. 507 00:28:02,980 --> 00:28:08,553 -Yes, but your car doesn't have a drift button. -A what? 508 00:28:08,619 --> 00:28:09,920 -A drift button. -What does that do? 509 00:28:09,987 --> 00:28:11,589 Well, you push it, and then, 510 00:28:11,656 --> 00:28:15,059 when you go round a corner, the car drifts. 511 00:28:15,125 --> 00:28:16,326 -Does it? -Yeah. 512 00:28:16,461 --> 00:28:18,328 You know, I'd love to see that in action. 513 00:28:18,463 --> 00:28:20,130 -I'd love to see you doing that. -Yes. 514 00:28:20,197 --> 00:28:22,633 -I'll watch. Yeah, show me. -You stay there. 515 00:28:22,700 --> 00:28:25,570 You will not... Even James May could drift this. 516 00:28:25,636 --> 00:28:27,638 -Here we go! -I can't wait to watch. 517 00:28:36,681 --> 00:28:38,849 JEREMY: Check it out, ladies and gentlemen! 518 00:28:38,916 --> 00:28:40,485 Check it out! 519 00:28:40,485 --> 00:28:42,953 I'm drifting. 520 00:28:43,020 --> 00:28:45,890 (LAUGHS) What do you think of that, Hammond? Look at that! 521 00:28:51,896 --> 00:28:53,498 Hammond? 522 00:28:55,866 --> 00:28:57,502 Hammond? 523 00:28:58,836 --> 00:29:00,204 Hammond! 524 00:29:02,907 --> 00:29:04,775 (CHEERING) 525 00:29:07,745 --> 00:29:09,780 What? You're not gonna blame me. 526 00:29:09,847 --> 00:29:13,684 -Where did you go? -Well, I left you because you were being moronic. 527 00:29:13,751 --> 00:29:15,352 -I wasn't! -You were! 528 00:29:15,419 --> 00:29:16,687 Seriously, who is going to buy 529 00:29:16,754 --> 00:29:18,523 a Ford Focus when, for the same money, 530 00:29:18,556 --> 00:29:20,390 you could have a V8-engine Mustang? 531 00:29:20,525 --> 00:29:21,859 -No-one. -What? 532 00:29:21,926 --> 00:29:25,530 Nobody would. Mustang's got so much more character. 533 00:29:25,563 --> 00:29:26,997 Hang on. So, you agree with me? 534 00:29:27,064 --> 00:29:28,432 Oh, God, yes! If I had the choice of those two cars, 535 00:29:28,533 --> 00:29:31,168 I'd have the Mustang every day of the week. 536 00:29:32,770 --> 00:29:35,540 So you ruined my day out for no reason at all? 537 00:29:35,606 --> 00:29:39,877 I ruined your day out because it was fun... to ruin your day out. 538 00:29:39,944 --> 00:29:42,212 -Good work. -It was good work. Sorry about that. 539 00:29:42,279 --> 00:29:46,617 But anyway, we must now find out how fast those Fords go round our track, 540 00:29:46,684 --> 00:29:51,856 and that, of course, means handing them over to our other resident American - 541 00:29:51,922 --> 00:29:56,561 a man who thinks that shower gel is basically communist. 542 00:29:56,561 --> 00:29:57,628 It's the American. 543 00:29:57,695 --> 00:29:58,996 (REVVING) 544 00:29:59,063 --> 00:30:01,298 JEREMY: There he is, looking bewildered. 545 00:30:01,365 --> 00:30:03,100 And he's away! 546 00:30:04,869 --> 00:30:08,005 It sounds like a bunch of goddamn mice in there. 547 00:30:11,075 --> 00:30:13,944 Why the hell don't they just start with eight cylinders? 548 00:30:14,011 --> 00:30:19,149 Strangest mice I ever heard, as he powers down the Isn't. 549 00:30:19,216 --> 00:30:21,051 That is a good noise. 550 00:30:21,118 --> 00:30:24,254 Arms working the wheel like he's wrestling a drifter, 551 00:30:24,321 --> 00:30:25,756 which, of course, he is. 552 00:30:25,823 --> 00:30:27,925 And already he's at Your Name Here. 553 00:30:27,992 --> 00:30:30,728 Tyres squealing, but it's clinging on well, 554 00:30:30,795 --> 00:30:32,930 and now the climb back onto the Isn't. 555 00:30:32,997 --> 00:30:34,799 It ain't got no room in it. 556 00:30:35,933 --> 00:30:38,235 No place to put your beer. 557 00:30:38,302 --> 00:30:42,439 I think he and I look for slightly different things in a car. 558 00:30:42,506 --> 00:30:44,709 Anyway, now hard on the brakes 559 00:30:44,775 --> 00:30:48,345 as he turns into Old Lady's House. 560 00:30:48,412 --> 00:30:51,181 Yeah, he is dispatching that with no dramas, 561 00:30:51,248 --> 00:30:53,250 and now he can get the hammer down 562 00:30:53,317 --> 00:30:55,586 for the bumpy sprint to Substation. 563 00:30:55,653 --> 00:30:57,121 Looking good. 564 00:30:57,187 --> 00:30:59,223 Four-wheel-drive cars can, of course, understeer, 565 00:30:59,289 --> 00:31:02,559 but... nope, not a whiff of it here. 566 00:31:02,627 --> 00:31:06,530 And Field Of Sheep, tidy through there as well, 567 00:31:06,631 --> 00:31:08,098 and across the line. 568 00:31:09,366 --> 00:31:12,737 Now, I think he might enjoy this one. 569 00:31:12,803 --> 00:31:15,305 And he is wheel-spinning away! 570 00:31:16,641 --> 00:31:18,943 All right! American muscle, baby! 571 00:31:20,110 --> 00:31:22,947 5.0 Mustang - this thing is badass. 572 00:31:26,350 --> 00:31:29,086 It's got a trunk, a place for my golf clubs. 573 00:31:29,153 --> 00:31:32,723 Pack up the old lady, go for the weekend somewhere in this thing, 574 00:31:32,790 --> 00:31:35,125 and you can haul ass while you're goin'. 575 00:31:35,192 --> 00:31:38,863 Something there about an old lady and hauling a bottom. 576 00:31:38,929 --> 00:31:40,130 Anyway, he's on the Isn't, 577 00:31:40,197 --> 00:31:42,733 and he's flying into Your Name Here. 578 00:31:42,800 --> 00:31:46,070 The mighty Mustang has filled the American with vigour, 579 00:31:46,136 --> 00:31:48,072 and he's being surprisingly tidy. 580 00:31:51,676 --> 00:31:55,145 That's what us Americans want, we want to smoke the tyres. 581 00:31:55,212 --> 00:31:58,783 We want this thing to just get shit and get. 582 00:31:58,849 --> 00:32:02,452 Literally no idea what he's on about. It's just a noise. 583 00:32:02,519 --> 00:32:05,690 When this thing stops, man, it stops on a dime. 584 00:32:05,690 --> 00:32:09,459 "It'll stop on a dime and give you nine cents change" is what we say. 585 00:32:09,526 --> 00:32:11,696 You really can't shut him up about this one. 586 00:32:11,696 --> 00:32:15,365 Anyway, he is keeping it neat round Old Lady's House, 587 00:32:15,432 --> 00:32:18,836 and then unleashing that V8 fury 588 00:32:18,903 --> 00:32:21,371 over the rough stuff to Substation. 589 00:32:21,438 --> 00:32:24,975 Hard on the brakes, ready for the 90 left. 590 00:32:25,042 --> 00:32:27,144 Blip it up to Field Of Sheep. 591 00:32:27,211 --> 00:32:28,545 Here we go. 592 00:32:28,612 --> 00:32:32,717 Flurry of exuberance, and across the line. 593 00:32:32,717 --> 00:32:34,384 -(CHEERING) -There we are. 594 00:32:37,487 --> 00:32:39,223 OK, here's the Lap Board. 595 00:32:39,289 --> 00:32:43,527 Let's have a look, first of all, where the Focus went. 596 00:32:43,593 --> 00:32:45,295 So... 597 00:32:45,362 --> 00:32:46,764 Oh, there it is. 598 00:32:46,831 --> 00:32:49,233 Faster than an ST200 - perhaps not surprising. 599 00:32:49,299 --> 00:32:50,200 Just as well. 600 00:32:50,267 --> 00:32:53,570 Now let's bring up the Mustang. 601 00:32:53,637 --> 00:32:55,039 -Oh! -(AUDIENCE GASPS) 602 00:32:57,274 --> 00:33:00,144 -That's not embarrassing, is it? -(LAUGHTER) 603 00:33:00,210 --> 00:33:04,214 The car that you, me, and the American all prefer 604 00:33:04,281 --> 00:33:07,517 is quite a lot slower than the European Focus. 605 00:33:07,584 --> 00:33:08,819 RICHARD: Yes. 606 00:33:08,886 --> 00:33:10,654 Anyway, listen, let's move on, shall we, 607 00:33:10,755 --> 00:33:13,190 to Celebrity Brain Crash. 608 00:33:18,796 --> 00:33:20,765 (CHEERING) 609 00:33:20,798 --> 00:33:22,566 Now... 610 00:33:22,632 --> 00:33:26,871 our guest this week isn't just my favourite Formula One driver, 611 00:33:26,937 --> 00:33:29,139 he's also a local boy. 612 00:33:29,206 --> 00:33:33,277 Oh, yeah, this is the chatty man of motorsport, 613 00:33:33,343 --> 00:33:34,511 Mr Effervescent, 614 00:33:34,578 --> 00:33:37,247 ladies and gentlemen, Kimi Räikkönen! 615 00:33:37,314 --> 00:33:38,648 (CHEERING) 616 00:33:38,783 --> 00:33:40,184 Here he comes. 617 00:33:42,920 --> 00:33:44,654 RICHARD: What are we gonna ask him? 618 00:33:44,789 --> 00:33:46,390 It doesn't matter what you ask him. 619 00:33:46,456 --> 00:33:50,194 It doesn't, because you won't get a coherent answer. 620 00:33:50,260 --> 00:33:52,129 Is he all right? 621 00:33:53,798 --> 00:33:55,065 JEREMY: No, hang on. Whoa! 622 00:33:56,200 --> 00:33:58,102 RICHARD: Oh, no. JEREMY: Not again. 623 00:33:58,168 --> 00:33:59,804 (LAUGHTER) 624 00:33:59,870 --> 00:34:02,206 No, he has, I'm afraid, ladies and gentlemen, 625 00:34:02,272 --> 00:34:04,608 literally drunk himself to death. 626 00:34:04,674 --> 00:34:05,609 (LAUGHTER) 627 00:34:05,675 --> 00:34:07,111 JEREMY: Damn. 628 00:34:07,177 --> 00:34:09,814 -Does that mean he's not coming on, then? -(LAUGHTER) 629 00:34:09,814 --> 00:34:11,015 Well, his liver has failed 630 00:34:11,081 --> 00:34:12,516 and he's now slowly solidifying 631 00:34:12,582 --> 00:34:16,520 in the freezing dusk of an Arctic night, so that's a no. 632 00:34:16,586 --> 00:34:17,621 (LAUGHTER) 633 00:34:17,687 --> 00:34:18,956 Yeah, but it doesn't matter. 634 00:34:19,023 --> 00:34:20,958 Well, it does, cos I actually rather liked Kimi. 635 00:34:21,025 --> 00:34:24,261 But I can think of something else we can do to fill the time. 636 00:34:24,328 --> 00:34:26,831 Here's the thing. Er... If you're watching this 637 00:34:26,897 --> 00:34:29,466 on the day the programme is actually released, 638 00:34:29,533 --> 00:34:32,102 it is December 23rd. 639 00:34:32,169 --> 00:34:34,371 There are two days to go until Christmas, 640 00:34:34,438 --> 00:34:38,876 and if you're a man, you won't have done any shopping yet. 641 00:34:38,943 --> 00:34:40,377 (LAUGHTER) 642 00:34:40,444 --> 00:34:42,512 -But don't worry, cos we've got your back. -Oh, yeah. 643 00:34:42,579 --> 00:34:44,915 We have trawled the Internet and the shops 644 00:34:44,982 --> 00:34:47,617 to find the best gift ideas. 645 00:34:47,684 --> 00:34:53,123 Yes, and here, in our special Grand Tour Santa Land Grotto. 646 00:34:53,190 --> 00:34:55,192 -Yeah. -(CHEERING AND APPLAUSE) 647 00:34:55,259 --> 00:34:57,594 Nice view. Nice everything. 648 00:34:57,661 --> 00:34:58,863 Yeah. Er... 649 00:34:58,929 --> 00:35:01,866 We begin with this rather brilliant tray, 650 00:35:01,866 --> 00:35:05,903 which, apparently, is the ideal place to put your laptop or your breakfast. 651 00:35:05,970 --> 00:35:07,938 We have a picture of it in action here. 652 00:35:08,005 --> 00:35:10,107 (LAUGHTER) 653 00:35:10,174 --> 00:35:13,277 RICHARD: Hang on a minute! -I see a couple of problems with that. 654 00:35:13,343 --> 00:35:15,212 RICHARD: I can too. -What else have we got? 655 00:35:15,279 --> 00:35:18,015 Well, now, the reason I don't play chess any more 656 00:35:18,082 --> 00:35:20,750 is it's just so exhausting to move the pieces around. 657 00:35:20,885 --> 00:35:24,121 -I know what you mean. -Far too heavy, picking the Queen up and moving her. 658 00:35:24,188 --> 00:35:28,358 But it's OK, because Ferrari has answered that problem with this. 659 00:35:28,425 --> 00:35:32,062 -It's a lightweight, carbon-fibre chess set... -(LAUGHTER) 660 00:35:32,129 --> 00:35:35,065 ...and it's yours for £1,400. 661 00:35:35,132 --> 00:35:38,768 -How much?! -£1,400. 662 00:35:38,903 --> 00:35:41,471 And that is the funny thing - you take something ordinary, 663 00:35:41,538 --> 00:35:44,909 write a car name on it, and suddenly it becomes expensive. 664 00:35:44,909 --> 00:35:47,511 This bear, for example. I know about bears. 665 00:35:47,577 --> 00:35:50,314 It's an acrylic fibre, 666 00:35:50,380 --> 00:35:52,349 stuffed with industrial waste. 667 00:35:52,416 --> 00:35:53,517 £2.75. 668 00:35:53,583 --> 00:35:57,654 But, because it's got a Honda T-shirt on, £10. 669 00:35:57,721 --> 00:35:58,788 -(LAUGHTER) -£10. 670 00:35:58,923 --> 00:36:00,724 Yes, but it's Honda Bear! 671 00:36:00,790 --> 00:36:02,026 -Or... -(LAUGHTER) 672 00:36:02,092 --> 00:36:04,061 I love that! On Christmas morning, Honda Bear! 673 00:36:04,128 --> 00:36:06,230 I love following his adventures! 674 00:36:06,296 --> 00:36:08,432 How about this lovingly crafted 675 00:36:08,498 --> 00:36:11,701 "I love my Hyundai" pillowcase? 676 00:36:11,768 --> 00:36:12,937 (LAUGHTER) 677 00:36:13,003 --> 00:36:15,205 What woman is ever going to leap into bed 678 00:36:15,272 --> 00:36:17,441 with a man whose pillows bear that legend? 679 00:36:17,507 --> 00:36:20,177 OK, Hammond, I'll tell you exactly what woman. 680 00:36:20,244 --> 00:36:23,113 The woman who would wear this thong, 681 00:36:23,180 --> 00:36:25,849 which has written lovingly on the front, 682 00:36:25,950 --> 00:36:27,717 the legend Elantra. 683 00:36:27,784 --> 00:36:28,986 (LAUGHTER) 684 00:36:29,053 --> 00:36:31,055 Erotic! Erotic! 685 00:36:31,121 --> 00:36:37,261 Can I just say, the perfect Christmas gift for the Hyundai owner is a BMW. 686 00:36:37,327 --> 00:36:39,396 Well, yes, look, we realised that branding stuff, 687 00:36:39,463 --> 00:36:43,968 obviously there's some money in it, so we thought, since we're in Scandinavia, 688 00:36:44,001 --> 00:36:48,772 we would launch our own range of car-branded Christmas jumpers. 689 00:36:48,838 --> 00:36:50,807 JEREMY: Mm-hm. RICHARD: Oh, yeah. Yeah. 690 00:36:50,874 --> 00:36:53,677 -Talk among yourselves, everybody. RICHARD: Hold on a moment. 691 00:36:53,743 --> 00:36:56,280 JEREMY: This is modelling time. 692 00:36:56,346 --> 00:36:59,616 (CLEARS THROAT) Mine is a simple turtleneck. 693 00:36:59,683 --> 00:37:03,353 Very, very warm, bearing the name of a legend on the front. 694 00:37:03,420 --> 00:37:06,423 I know, it's very special. Very Christmassy, yeah? 695 00:37:06,490 --> 00:37:10,060 -I have gone for a very cuddly... -(LAUGHTER) 696 00:37:10,127 --> 00:37:12,362 ...and Christmassy cardigan bearing the name, 697 00:37:12,429 --> 00:37:15,365 as you can see, of a car I absolutely adore. 698 00:37:15,432 --> 00:37:17,667 Yeah, and here's the thing, OK. 699 00:37:17,734 --> 00:37:19,036 Mine is a crewneck, actually. 700 00:37:19,103 --> 00:37:20,437 (LAUGHTER) 701 00:37:22,806 --> 00:37:24,008 (APPLAUSE) 702 00:37:24,041 --> 00:37:25,375 Why is everybody...? 703 00:37:27,577 --> 00:37:30,614 -Why are you applauding? RICHARD: I don't know. 704 00:37:30,680 --> 00:37:33,017 I think... 705 00:37:33,017 --> 00:37:34,618 -Why are you...? -Is it...? 706 00:37:34,684 --> 00:37:36,686 Is it because they haven't seen us in knitwear before? 707 00:37:36,753 --> 00:37:38,355 (LAUGHTER) 708 00:37:38,422 --> 00:37:41,191 Anyway, we've had a go at making some Grand Tour-branded stuff. 709 00:37:41,258 --> 00:37:42,526 -Oh, yeah. -But here's the thing. 710 00:37:42,592 --> 00:37:43,860 We haven't gone for the obvious stuff, 711 00:37:43,927 --> 00:37:45,895 like jumpers and mugs and umbrellas. 712 00:37:46,030 --> 00:37:49,466 We've gone for things that other people haven't thought of. 713 00:37:49,533 --> 00:37:50,834 Things like this - 714 00:37:50,900 --> 00:37:52,069 haemorrhoid cream. 715 00:37:52,136 --> 00:37:53,337 (LAUGHTER) 716 00:37:53,403 --> 00:37:55,272 -We all need it. -I don't. 717 00:37:55,339 --> 00:37:56,840 No, I don't, either. 718 00:37:56,906 --> 00:37:59,343 -Well, this is mine. -(LAUGHTER) 719 00:37:59,409 --> 00:38:02,712 Bought it for £2.75, but now it's got Grand Tour on it, 720 00:38:02,779 --> 00:38:05,615 we could sell that for £20. 721 00:38:05,682 --> 00:38:08,618 I tell you what really good idea we've had erm... 722 00:38:08,685 --> 00:38:11,521 is condoms, OK, which have been... 723 00:38:11,588 --> 00:38:14,191 well, they've been branded with well-known expressions 724 00:38:14,258 --> 00:38:16,160 and phrases that we often say. 725 00:38:16,226 --> 00:38:18,595 -I'm gonna demonstrate using this-- -Whoa! 726 00:38:18,662 --> 00:38:19,696 (LAUGHTER) 727 00:38:19,763 --> 00:38:21,198 You flatter yourself, sir! 728 00:38:21,265 --> 00:38:23,600 -Au contraire. -(LAUGHS) Oh, really? 729 00:38:23,667 --> 00:38:28,705 So we simply roll the condom over the rolling pin. 730 00:38:28,772 --> 00:38:32,109 Here it is. There's the GT logo coming up. 731 00:38:32,176 --> 00:38:34,478 And on the other side, "How hard can it be?" 732 00:38:34,544 --> 00:38:37,081 -(LAUGHTER) RICHARD: We're very pleased. 733 00:38:38,948 --> 00:38:42,519 JEREMY: Pretty damn hard, for a man of my age. 734 00:38:42,586 --> 00:38:44,921 We're... We're very pleased with these. 735 00:38:44,988 --> 00:38:48,458 Various of our slogans have been used. I'm going to put mine on this er... 736 00:38:48,525 --> 00:38:50,460 disappointingly small carrot. 737 00:38:50,527 --> 00:38:51,495 (LAUGHTER) 738 00:38:51,561 --> 00:38:54,164 Erm... And it bears one of my expressions. 739 00:38:54,231 --> 00:38:56,100 -See, I can't-- -Don't bite it! 740 00:38:56,133 --> 00:38:58,135 Well, I can't open the thing, can I? 741 00:38:58,202 --> 00:38:59,969 No, there's one of those little tear things. 742 00:39:00,104 --> 00:39:02,872 -Hold on, love. I'll be with you in a minute. -(LAUGHTER) 743 00:39:02,939 --> 00:39:06,476 -No, it's-- -You're not gonna be here to help me when I'm using it! 744 00:39:06,543 --> 00:39:08,112 -You don't know! -I bloody do! 745 00:39:08,178 --> 00:39:10,247 -I might be. -I'm pretty sure you won't be. 746 00:39:10,314 --> 00:39:12,416 That's quite the wrong thing to... Are you in? 747 00:39:12,482 --> 00:39:15,285 -Yeah, I'm... What?! -Can I have my glasses back? 748 00:39:15,352 --> 00:39:16,820 -No. -No, I want my glasses back 749 00:39:16,886 --> 00:39:19,423 before you start messing around with sex things. 750 00:39:19,489 --> 00:39:21,725 Oh, right, let me... Oh, dear. It's a bit baggy. 751 00:39:21,791 --> 00:39:23,960 I've actually torn it with my teeth, 752 00:39:24,027 --> 00:39:27,030 which makes the slogan on it quite appropriate, really - 753 00:39:27,131 --> 00:39:28,665 "That's not gone well." 754 00:39:28,732 --> 00:39:30,267 (LAUGHTER) 755 00:39:30,334 --> 00:39:32,902 Can I just say, that is by far and away 756 00:39:32,969 --> 00:39:35,639 the least erotic thing I have ever... 757 00:39:35,705 --> 00:39:38,208 Don't tell me that's not an unfamiliar sight. 758 00:39:46,983 --> 00:39:48,485 Oh, have you done one as well? 759 00:39:48,552 --> 00:39:51,155 Of course I have. Very sensibly, I put mine on earlier. 760 00:39:51,188 --> 00:39:53,022 -Whoa! -(LAUGHTER) 761 00:39:53,157 --> 00:39:56,793 Branded with the GT logo and my own personal catchphrase, 762 00:39:56,860 --> 00:39:58,362 "I was the first to arrive." 763 00:39:58,428 --> 00:39:59,763 (LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE) 764 00:40:02,632 --> 00:40:07,504 Now, are you bored with having two fully functioning ankles? 765 00:40:07,571 --> 00:40:09,339 Yes? Well, don't worry if you are, 766 00:40:09,406 --> 00:40:12,242 because this Christmas, the market is awash with products 767 00:40:12,309 --> 00:40:14,378 designed specifically to break them. 768 00:40:14,444 --> 00:40:17,147 such as this iBot-9. 769 00:40:17,214 --> 00:40:18,748 I thought that was a vacuum cleaner. 770 00:40:18,815 --> 00:40:19,849 No, it's incredibly heavy 771 00:40:19,916 --> 00:40:21,885 because it's packed full of pain. 772 00:40:21,951 --> 00:40:25,088 Basically, you put these things out on the side, you stand and whizz about. 773 00:40:25,155 --> 00:40:28,258 But within seconds of getting on, you will be falling over and breaking your ankles. 774 00:40:28,325 --> 00:40:29,626 Probably so. 775 00:40:29,693 --> 00:40:32,396 Yes, and on the other hand, there are also these. 776 00:40:32,462 --> 00:40:34,898 These are called the Rocket Skates. 777 00:40:34,964 --> 00:40:37,434 They will cost you just £900, 778 00:40:37,501 --> 00:40:41,004 and they are guaranteed to power you straight to casualty. 779 00:40:41,070 --> 00:40:42,406 RICHARD: Yeah. 780 00:40:42,472 --> 00:40:44,408 -No, they're fine. JAMES: No, they're really not. 781 00:40:44,474 --> 00:40:48,245 -I'll be all right. I could have a go on those. -Who'd like to see that? 782 00:40:48,312 --> 00:40:50,614 -(CHEERING) -You said it. 783 00:40:50,680 --> 00:40:52,616 Seriously. I mean, honestly... 784 00:40:55,385 --> 00:40:57,086 -"How hard can it be?" -(LAUGHTER) 785 00:40:57,153 --> 00:40:59,589 See, I knew it would come in handy. I can bludgeon... 786 00:40:59,656 --> 00:41:01,691 -Seriously, I'll have a go. -Off you go, mate. 787 00:41:01,758 --> 00:41:04,361 -Yeah. Can I wear my shoes in them? -(IMITATES AMBULANCE SIREN) 788 00:41:04,428 --> 00:41:06,563 -(LAUGHTER) -Are they like ski boots? 789 00:41:06,630 --> 00:41:09,899 RICHARD: Yes, Jeremy, apart from they've got wheels and you're indoors. 790 00:41:09,966 --> 00:41:13,237 -I am not going near them. -Just put my foot in them. 791 00:41:13,270 --> 00:41:15,405 I don't want to! 792 00:41:15,472 --> 00:41:18,442 -I can't see what I'm... -It's degrading and unpleasant. 793 00:41:18,508 --> 00:41:23,313 -Do I take my shoes off? -Put your great cloven hoof in there. 794 00:41:23,380 --> 00:41:25,782 It fits! You can go to the ball. 795 00:41:25,849 --> 00:41:27,551 -(LAUGHTER) -There, you're in. 796 00:41:27,617 --> 00:41:29,719 -Thank you. -Now what are you gonna do? 797 00:41:29,786 --> 00:41:31,120 You're not gonna do it! 798 00:41:31,255 --> 00:41:32,589 (LAUGHTER) 799 00:41:34,791 --> 00:41:37,661 -Is that it? Have you started? -Not yet. 800 00:41:37,727 --> 00:41:39,729 I better face the other way, hadn't I? 801 00:41:41,331 --> 00:41:42,866 RICHARD: Looking good. 802 00:41:42,932 --> 00:41:44,167 These are worth every... 803 00:41:44,268 --> 00:41:46,336 What will they cost, 900 quid? 804 00:41:46,403 --> 00:41:48,272 -Nine hundred quid. -Literally every penny. 805 00:41:48,272 --> 00:41:51,174 Wait, hold it there. Hold it there. 806 00:41:51,275 --> 00:41:53,777 Look out, girls, Mr Darcy's arrived. 807 00:41:53,843 --> 00:41:54,978 (LAUGHTER) 808 00:41:55,044 --> 00:41:56,446 RICHARD: Looking good. 809 00:42:01,485 --> 00:42:03,820 RICHARD: Oh, this is brilliant. JAMES: Wow! 810 00:42:03,887 --> 00:42:07,824 I can see why they're called Rocket Skates. 811 00:42:07,891 --> 00:42:10,727 -Come on, man. -(GROANS) Oh, God! I'm trying to move! 812 00:42:10,794 --> 00:42:13,497 WOMAN: Lean back! -What do you mean, "Lean back"? 813 00:42:15,865 --> 00:42:18,067 (LAUGHTER) 814 00:42:18,134 --> 00:42:19,536 Like that? 815 00:42:21,838 --> 00:42:22,906 -Jeremy? -What? 816 00:42:22,972 --> 00:42:25,008 Stephen Hawking would make a better job of these 817 00:42:25,074 --> 00:42:26,510 Rocket Skates than you have. 818 00:42:28,512 --> 00:42:29,913 -Right... -Where are you going?! 819 00:42:29,979 --> 00:42:32,749 -You've got to get one... RICHARD: Do you remember... 820 00:42:32,816 --> 00:42:35,952 -(SHOUTING) RICHARD: Whoa! It's a disaster! 821 00:42:36,019 --> 00:42:38,221 (APPLAUSE) 822 00:42:38,322 --> 00:42:40,624 JEREMY: Shit. Sorry. 823 00:42:40,690 --> 00:42:43,192 Don't worry, Jeremy. I will come and rescue on my... 824 00:42:43,327 --> 00:42:44,394 Bloody hell! 825 00:42:44,461 --> 00:42:46,330 -Oh, my God. It's going mad. -(BEEPING) 826 00:42:46,396 --> 00:42:47,997 Erm... Right. Right. 827 00:42:48,064 --> 00:42:51,335 -I put my foot on there. -This is a really good ambulance service. 828 00:42:51,368 --> 00:42:53,603 (LAUGHTER) 829 00:42:53,670 --> 00:42:57,441 Yeah. Yeah. Don't worry, I'll be there in a minute. 830 00:42:57,507 --> 00:42:59,809 I don't know that this works. 831 00:42:59,876 --> 00:43:01,378 -I've gone again! -(LAUGHTER) 832 00:43:02,512 --> 00:43:04,848 Shit! Now I've got cramp! 833 00:43:04,914 --> 00:43:06,816 (YELLS) 834 00:43:06,883 --> 00:43:09,786 That was... That was a brilliant idea, but never mind, 835 00:43:09,853 --> 00:43:12,422 because erm... I have a perfect Christmas present here. 836 00:43:12,489 --> 00:43:15,925 You control this with your mobile phone and your face comes on it. 837 00:43:15,992 --> 00:43:18,227 And the brilliant thing about it is that it means 838 00:43:18,362 --> 00:43:23,367 you can have your favourite celebrity round to your house for Christmas lunch. 839 00:43:23,433 --> 00:43:27,270 With that in mind, ladies and gentlemen, would you please welcome into the studio - 840 00:43:27,371 --> 00:43:32,842 he's actually in his office in London, and yet he's also here on top of a stick - 841 00:43:32,909 --> 00:43:34,378 it's Bob Geldof! 842 00:43:34,378 --> 00:43:35,712 (CHEERING) 843 00:43:37,747 --> 00:43:39,215 JEREMY: We're gonna say hello to Bob. 844 00:43:39,282 --> 00:43:41,751 RICHARD: I can't say hello to Bob! -He's coming, Hammond. 845 00:43:41,818 --> 00:43:43,653 -I just go in circles! -It is! 846 00:43:43,720 --> 00:43:45,755 It's Bob Geldof, everybody! 847 00:43:47,023 --> 00:43:49,058 Hello, Bob. Where have you gone? 848 00:43:49,125 --> 00:43:50,727 Bob! We're over here, Bob! 849 00:43:50,794 --> 00:43:52,462 -Bob! -Bob, we're over here! 850 00:43:52,529 --> 00:43:54,297 -Where are you? -He's there! 851 00:43:54,398 --> 00:43:56,566 Bob Geldof, how are you? 852 00:43:56,633 --> 00:43:58,602 Yes, happy Christmas! 853 00:43:58,668 --> 00:44:01,170 Oh, (BLEEP)! Sorry! 854 00:44:01,237 --> 00:44:03,840 -Are you having a good Christmas, Bob? -Oh, no! Bob's... 855 00:44:03,907 --> 00:44:07,276 Ladies and gentlemen, Bob Geldof is lost! 856 00:44:07,411 --> 00:44:09,646 He's gone in the wrong... 857 00:44:09,713 --> 00:44:11,681 JEREMY: Oh, James May's coming to join in. 858 00:44:11,748 --> 00:44:15,018 JAMES: I'm coming to talk to Bob Geldof. 859 00:44:15,084 --> 00:44:18,021 RICHARD: Whoa! JEREMY: May has kissed Bob Geldof! 860 00:44:18,087 --> 00:44:20,590 -Hello, Bob. How are you? -Get out of the way! 861 00:44:20,657 --> 00:44:22,692 -I'm travelling! -No, straight ahead, Bob. 862 00:44:22,759 --> 00:44:26,029 Bob, no. Left-hand down, Bob. No, Bob. Bob, you... 863 00:44:26,095 --> 00:44:28,732 Have I just attacked somebody's knob? 864 00:44:28,798 --> 00:44:30,700 RICHARD: Bob, stop attacking the crowd! 865 00:44:31,668 --> 00:44:32,902 Now where's he going?! 866 00:44:34,070 --> 00:44:36,005 Bob! 867 00:44:36,072 --> 00:44:38,307 JAMES: Right, I'll rescue Bob. Hold on. 868 00:44:38,442 --> 00:44:39,976 Straight ahead, Bob. That's perfect. 869 00:44:40,043 --> 00:44:42,979 -Straight ahead. Straight. A bit of right-hand down. -(LAUGHTER) 870 00:44:43,046 --> 00:44:47,016 No, don't drive into it! Stop head-butting the tree! 871 00:44:47,083 --> 00:44:48,652 This is ridiculous! 872 00:44:48,718 --> 00:44:51,287 Where's the reindeers and Santa Claus at? 873 00:44:51,354 --> 00:44:55,058 -(AUDIENCE GASPS) RICHARD: Oh, no! Hang on a minute! 874 00:44:55,124 --> 00:44:56,460 He's ruined Christmas! 875 00:44:56,526 --> 00:44:58,595 Does he know it's Christmas time at all? 876 00:44:58,662 --> 00:45:00,864 Well, tonight, thank God it's him instead of us 877 00:45:00,930 --> 00:45:02,466 knocking the Christmas tree over. 878 00:45:02,532 --> 00:45:04,968 Absolutely right. He's ruined it! 879 00:45:05,034 --> 00:45:06,169 Anyway, erm... 880 00:45:06,235 --> 00:45:07,504 (LAUGHTER) 881 00:45:07,571 --> 00:45:10,073 This year marks the 50th anniversary 882 00:45:10,139 --> 00:45:12,776 of the greatest battle in motorsport history. 883 00:45:12,842 --> 00:45:14,944 The story begins in the 1960s, 884 00:45:15,011 --> 00:45:18,815 when Ford realised that they could sell a lot more cars 885 00:45:18,882 --> 00:45:21,918 if they were a lot more successful on the racetrack. 886 00:45:21,985 --> 00:45:27,123 So they formulated a brilliant plan, but unfortunately... 887 00:45:27,190 --> 00:45:28,525 (LAUGHTER) 888 00:45:30,159 --> 00:45:32,696 ...it went disastrously wrong, didn't it, Bob? 889 00:45:37,934 --> 00:45:41,070 Ford knew that if you wanted to rule in motorsport, 890 00:45:41,137 --> 00:45:43,840 there was only one race that mattered. 891 00:45:43,907 --> 00:45:46,810 The toughest and most dangerous of them all - 892 00:45:46,876 --> 00:45:49,078 the 24 Hours of Le Mans. 893 00:45:49,145 --> 00:45:52,215 REPORTER: Levegh's Mercedes collides and blows up. 894 00:45:52,281 --> 00:45:54,283 JAMES: The problem was, for all its might, 895 00:45:54,350 --> 00:45:57,954 Ford didn't have a clue how to win at Le Mans. 896 00:45:58,021 --> 00:46:01,658 However, over in Italy, someone did. 897 00:46:09,833 --> 00:46:11,134 In the early 1960s, 898 00:46:11,200 --> 00:46:15,038 Enzo Ferrari's cars ruled sports-car racing, 899 00:46:15,104 --> 00:46:16,640 Le Mans especially. 900 00:46:16,706 --> 00:46:18,007 At the start of the decade, 901 00:46:18,074 --> 00:46:20,677 he had won the famous and gruelling 24-hour race 902 00:46:20,744 --> 00:46:23,112 three times on the trot. 903 00:46:23,179 --> 00:46:27,283 However, the company was in deep financial difficulty, 904 00:46:27,350 --> 00:46:30,554 so when Ford offered to buy the entire business, 905 00:46:30,554 --> 00:46:32,589 Enzo agreed. 906 00:46:35,391 --> 00:46:37,426 At first, all went well. 907 00:46:37,561 --> 00:46:41,965 Enzo Ferrari and the head of Ford, Henry Ford II, 908 00:46:42,031 --> 00:46:46,269 quickly settled on a price of $16 million. 909 00:46:46,335 --> 00:46:49,405 And on May 21st 1963, 910 00:46:49,472 --> 00:46:54,477 Ford executives arrived in Maranello to sign the deal. 911 00:46:54,578 --> 00:46:56,946 Ford turned up with an army of suits. 912 00:46:57,013 --> 00:46:58,882 Enzo Ferrari sat opposite them 913 00:46:58,948 --> 00:47:01,250 with just the local town lawyer. 914 00:47:01,317 --> 00:47:03,219 They read the contract and all seemed well, 915 00:47:03,286 --> 00:47:05,354 but then, suddenly, Ferrari stopped 916 00:47:05,421 --> 00:47:08,391 and he took out his famous fountain pen full of purple ink, 917 00:47:08,457 --> 00:47:11,628 and as you can see from this accurate copy I have here, 918 00:47:11,695 --> 00:47:14,230 he drew a big exclamation mark and he wrote, 919 00:47:14,297 --> 00:47:16,633 "No, that's no good!" 920 00:47:16,700 --> 00:47:19,703 Now, what had angered him? Well, it was this clause here. 921 00:47:19,769 --> 00:47:22,606 You see, Enzo Ferrari wanted to retain control 922 00:47:22,672 --> 00:47:24,808 of the motorsport side of his business, 923 00:47:24,874 --> 00:47:29,613 but this bit effectively handed control to Ford. 924 00:47:29,679 --> 00:47:33,016 There followed a tirade of abuse in Italian, 925 00:47:33,082 --> 00:47:35,819 after which, Enzo said to his lawyer, "Let's go and eat." 926 00:47:35,885 --> 00:47:40,423 Then they got up and they simply walked out on the stunned Ford executives. 927 00:47:40,489 --> 00:47:41,625 That was that. 928 00:47:41,691 --> 00:47:44,027 All of this for nothing. 929 00:47:45,328 --> 00:47:48,297 Back in Detroit, Henry Ford II, 930 00:47:48,364 --> 00:47:50,099 apoplectic with rage, 931 00:47:50,166 --> 00:47:53,036 gathered his lieutenants and issued the order: 932 00:47:53,102 --> 00:47:57,140 "Build me a car that will crush Ferrari at Le Mans." 933 00:48:00,309 --> 00:48:02,545 To beat Ferrari on European soil, 934 00:48:02,646 --> 00:48:04,948 Ford needed European expertise, 935 00:48:05,014 --> 00:48:07,350 so he hired a small British motorsport company 936 00:48:07,416 --> 00:48:10,887 that set up shop here, in this very building, 937 00:48:10,954 --> 00:48:14,924 on an industrial estate in Slough, just outside London. 938 00:48:14,991 --> 00:48:18,561 And the challenges they faced were enormous. 939 00:48:18,662 --> 00:48:22,799 They had to build a car that would race at over 200mph, 940 00:48:22,866 --> 00:48:24,668 which was something that had never been done before, 941 00:48:24,668 --> 00:48:29,038 and it had to be reliable for the 24 hours of the Le Mans race - 942 00:48:29,105 --> 00:48:32,541 a race in which you changed gear 9,000 times 943 00:48:32,676 --> 00:48:36,279 and drove flat out for 3,000 miles. 944 00:48:36,345 --> 00:48:40,817 And, as if that wasn't bad enough, they only had ten months to do it. 945 00:48:45,388 --> 00:48:49,225 Out of that insane timetable emerged this. 946 00:48:50,894 --> 00:48:52,796 The Ford GT. 947 00:48:52,862 --> 00:48:57,233 Thanks to its sleek shape and the body that stood just 40-inches tall, 948 00:48:57,300 --> 00:49:01,170 it promised to cut through the air like a missile. 949 00:49:01,237 --> 00:49:03,306 Add a 4.2L V8, 950 00:49:03,372 --> 00:49:08,544 and the magic target of 200mph seemed in the bag. 951 00:49:08,611 --> 00:49:13,416 The trouble is, a racing car is just a collection of hopes and dreams 952 00:49:13,482 --> 00:49:16,152 until it gets on the track. 953 00:49:16,219 --> 00:49:18,988 And that's something that Ford learned in a very brutal way 954 00:49:19,055 --> 00:49:23,760 when they took the GT40 to test at Le Mans for the first time. 955 00:49:25,394 --> 00:49:28,331 REPORTER: And so to the first Le Mans practice session. 956 00:49:28,397 --> 00:49:32,969 JAMES: On its first outing, the renamed GT40 was fast, 957 00:49:33,036 --> 00:49:35,772 but it was also terrifyingly unstable, 958 00:49:35,839 --> 00:49:38,842 spinning its wheels on the straights. 959 00:49:38,908 --> 00:49:40,910 I'm not talking about when you set off, 960 00:49:40,977 --> 00:49:44,347 I mean it was happening at 170mph! 961 00:49:47,150 --> 00:49:50,453 Now, the problem was either aerodynamics or suspension, 962 00:49:50,519 --> 00:49:51,855 but they never found out, 963 00:49:51,921 --> 00:49:57,260 because, later that day, the car crashed at 160mph. 964 00:49:57,326 --> 00:50:00,096 Well, that was OK. They had a spare one, of course. 965 00:50:00,163 --> 00:50:02,665 The next day, that crashed as well. 966 00:50:02,766 --> 00:50:05,434 Le Mans was just two months away. 967 00:50:08,371 --> 00:50:15,211 Against all odds, Ford got their act together in time for the 1964 race. 968 00:50:15,278 --> 00:50:17,346 REPORTER: The Le Mans 24 Hour Race at last, 969 00:50:17,413 --> 00:50:21,017 and three gleaming Ford GTs are present. 970 00:50:21,084 --> 00:50:23,119 JAMES: But during the race itself, 971 00:50:23,186 --> 00:50:26,655 all the cars broke down or caught fire, 972 00:50:26,722 --> 00:50:28,724 leaving bitter rivals Ferrari 973 00:50:28,792 --> 00:50:32,762 to take another one-two-three victory. 974 00:50:35,932 --> 00:50:39,769 In Detroit, Henry Ford decreed that they would be back next year 975 00:50:39,836 --> 00:50:41,971 to take on Ferrari again. 976 00:50:42,038 --> 00:50:43,873 And to head up the campaign, 977 00:50:43,940 --> 00:50:47,276 he turned to an American motorsport hero. 978 00:50:47,343 --> 00:50:50,579 My name's Carroll Shelby and performance is my business. 979 00:50:50,646 --> 00:50:53,749 Shelby was a former chicken farmer from Texas 980 00:50:53,817 --> 00:50:57,253 who took nitroglycerin pills to keep his heart going. 981 00:50:57,320 --> 00:50:59,688 But he'd also racked up countless victories 982 00:50:59,755 --> 00:51:02,225 as a driver and team owner. 983 00:51:02,291 --> 00:51:05,194 Given the task of turning the GT40 into a winner, 984 00:51:05,261 --> 00:51:07,563 he put his top man on the job. 985 00:51:07,630 --> 00:51:09,132 Coming up is Ken Miles, 986 00:51:09,198 --> 00:51:12,836 one of the best sport-car drivers in America. 987 00:51:12,836 --> 00:51:17,306 Miles was a former Second World War tank commander from Birmingham - 988 00:51:17,373 --> 00:51:20,209 the one in England, not Alabama. 989 00:51:20,276 --> 00:51:22,178 He was renowned for speaking his mind 990 00:51:22,245 --> 00:51:25,348 and developing racing cars. 991 00:51:25,414 --> 00:51:27,116 Miles took the car for a shakedown. 992 00:51:27,183 --> 00:51:30,419 Then he got out and he told Shelby and the Ford executives, 993 00:51:30,486 --> 00:51:32,088 "It's bloody awful!" 994 00:51:32,155 --> 00:51:33,857 Then he got to work, 995 00:51:33,890 --> 00:51:36,359 improving the brakes, the engine, 996 00:51:36,425 --> 00:51:38,394 the aerodynamics, the handling, 997 00:51:38,461 --> 00:51:43,466 and taming the car's terrifying high-speed instability. 998 00:51:43,532 --> 00:51:46,569 However, and even though he and his team took amphetamine 999 00:51:46,635 --> 00:51:48,437 so that they could stay awake all night, 1000 00:51:48,504 --> 00:51:53,476 there simply wasn't time to develop the car properly for Le Mans. 1001 00:51:53,542 --> 00:51:55,879 The GT40 may have been faster, 1002 00:51:55,945 --> 00:51:58,014 but it was still fragile. 1003 00:51:58,081 --> 00:51:59,883 At the 1965 race, 1004 00:51:59,949 --> 00:52:02,451 six cars started, none finished, 1005 00:52:02,518 --> 00:52:06,422 and the Italians humiliated Ford once again. 1006 00:52:08,491 --> 00:52:11,427 So, untold millions of dollars had been spent 1007 00:52:11,494 --> 00:52:15,031 since the first GT40 emerged from this building here, 1008 00:52:15,098 --> 00:52:19,202 and yet not one car had even finished the race. 1009 00:52:19,268 --> 00:52:20,970 So Ford now faced a difficult choice - 1010 00:52:21,037 --> 00:52:25,074 he could throw in the towel against Ferrari, or he could fight on. 1011 00:52:25,141 --> 00:52:28,311 What he actually did was he had some business cards printed, 1012 00:52:28,377 --> 00:52:30,914 and he distributed them to his Le Mans team. 1013 00:52:30,947 --> 00:52:34,050 And on the cards it said, "You'd better win." 1014 00:52:34,117 --> 00:52:35,684 And so, a year later, 1015 00:52:35,751 --> 00:52:38,387 the American giant returned to Le Mans 1016 00:52:38,454 --> 00:52:42,491 with its hopes resting on this. 1017 00:52:42,558 --> 00:52:43,927 (ENGINE REVVING) 1018 00:52:50,033 --> 00:52:51,500 OK, viewers, 1019 00:52:51,567 --> 00:52:56,572 this is historic-race-car bucket-list moment number two, 1020 00:52:56,639 --> 00:52:59,375 because this is an actual GT40 1021 00:52:59,442 --> 00:53:03,179 that competed at Le Mans in 1966. 1022 00:53:05,581 --> 00:53:08,952 All right, don't go mad, May, it's worth 15-million quid. 1023 00:53:10,353 --> 00:53:12,956 Sod it! Let's make some noise! 1024 00:53:19,428 --> 00:53:20,363 Oh, yes! 1025 00:53:23,066 --> 00:53:24,667 In this new GT40, 1026 00:53:24,733 --> 00:53:28,637 Ken Miles had racked up thousands of test hours. 1027 00:53:28,704 --> 00:53:32,175 Now the car was no longer horribly unstable, 1028 00:53:32,241 --> 00:53:36,579 but would sit rocksteady at 210mph. 1029 00:53:36,645 --> 00:53:41,584 And the Brummie tank commander had the backing of Ford's huge R&D department, 1030 00:53:41,650 --> 00:53:44,353 who tackled the car's appalling reliability. 1031 00:53:46,589 --> 00:53:49,258 The brakes no longer went into thermal shock 1032 00:53:49,325 --> 00:53:51,660 at the end of the long straight. 1033 00:53:51,727 --> 00:53:55,598 The engine and transmission were run on a computerised test rig 1034 00:53:55,664 --> 00:53:59,735 that simulated the whole of the 24-Hour Le Mans race. 1035 00:53:59,802 --> 00:54:02,371 Now, that's standard practice in Formula One today, 1036 00:54:02,438 --> 00:54:06,109 but in 1966 that was witchcraft. 1037 00:54:08,111 --> 00:54:11,047 They weren't mucking about, these blokes. 1038 00:54:11,114 --> 00:54:13,749 But neither were the opposition. 1039 00:54:13,816 --> 00:54:17,020 Over in Italy, in response to the new threat, 1040 00:54:17,086 --> 00:54:19,455 Ferrari produced this. 1041 00:54:25,928 --> 00:54:30,599 Called the P3, it looked as sleek as a GT40. 1042 00:54:30,666 --> 00:54:35,471 And at just 37.4 inches tall, it was even lower. 1043 00:54:40,143 --> 00:54:42,078 Avanti! 1044 00:54:45,048 --> 00:54:47,350 Whoo! Holy mother! 1045 00:54:47,416 --> 00:54:50,753 I best be a little bit careful on this narrow road. 1046 00:54:50,819 --> 00:54:53,556 It's worth £20 million. 1047 00:54:55,524 --> 00:55:01,064 Where the GT40 boasted a top speed of over 210mph, 1048 00:55:01,097 --> 00:55:04,300 the P3 maxed out at just 190. 1049 00:55:04,367 --> 00:55:10,473 But Enzo Ferrari was willing to trade outright speed for gains elsewhere. 1050 00:55:11,740 --> 00:55:14,210 The Ferrari was lighter, it was more agile. 1051 00:55:14,277 --> 00:55:17,646 Ferrari reckoned he could make up the difference in the bends, 1052 00:55:17,713 --> 00:55:21,084 and he wouldn't have to stop so often for fuel. 1053 00:55:22,685 --> 00:55:26,189 A David and Goliath battle was looming. 1054 00:55:26,255 --> 00:55:31,794 At the 1966 Le Mans race, Ford arrived with an armada - 1055 00:55:31,860 --> 00:55:35,098 eight cars, 20 tonnes of spares, 1056 00:55:35,164 --> 00:55:37,500 and a squad of world-class drivers, 1057 00:55:37,566 --> 00:55:40,136 including Ken Miles himself. 1058 00:55:40,203 --> 00:55:44,607 In comparison, Ferrari turned up with just a trio of P3s, 1059 00:55:44,673 --> 00:55:46,575 but Enzo had an ace up his sleeve - 1060 00:55:46,642 --> 00:55:50,313 the undisputed fastest driver on the planet, 1061 00:55:50,379 --> 00:55:54,883 Formula One World Champion John Surtees. 1062 00:55:54,950 --> 00:56:01,290 He came to me and said, "John... we've got to beat the Fords. Go out and do it." 1063 00:56:01,357 --> 00:56:02,925 I thought there was only one tactic - 1064 00:56:02,991 --> 00:56:06,629 to have at least one car be the hare. 1065 00:56:06,695 --> 00:56:11,134 I said, "Look, I don't mind being the hare." 1066 00:56:11,134 --> 00:56:12,935 "The moment that flag goes down, 1067 00:56:13,001 --> 00:56:14,937 we need to be - bang - off," 1068 00:56:15,003 --> 00:56:19,808 tempting the Ford drivers to perhaps overdrive a little bit. 1069 00:56:19,875 --> 00:56:22,811 If one could push them hard enough for long enough, 1070 00:56:22,878 --> 00:56:28,016 then there is more likelihood, obviously, of being able to break them. 1071 00:56:28,151 --> 00:56:29,852 The plan was set. 1072 00:56:29,918 --> 00:56:34,157 But, as zero hour approached, everything unravelled. 1073 00:56:34,223 --> 00:56:37,393 REPORTER: Shortly before the race, we learned that he wasn't going to drive, 1074 00:56:37,460 --> 00:56:39,195 and we asked him about it. 1075 00:56:39,262 --> 00:56:42,965 Yes, unfortunately you've heard correct. I won't be driving. 1076 00:56:43,031 --> 00:56:45,033 REPORTER: What is the reason? 1077 00:56:45,168 --> 00:56:48,171 Well, I suppose it's best summed up at this stage 1078 00:56:48,204 --> 00:56:50,706 by saying "political reasons." 1079 00:56:50,773 --> 00:56:53,041 JAMES: The problem was that the Ferrari team manager 1080 00:56:53,176 --> 00:56:55,444 was playing his own political game. 1081 00:56:55,511 --> 00:56:57,913 He had no particular liking for Surtees, 1082 00:56:57,980 --> 00:56:59,548 and he nominated another driver 1083 00:56:59,615 --> 00:57:02,651 to go out and start the race, to be the hare, 1084 00:57:02,718 --> 00:57:08,291 even though Surtees was clearly the fastest man available. 1085 00:57:08,357 --> 00:57:12,895 SURTEES: And I just stormed away, drove back, and had it out with the old man. 1086 00:57:12,961 --> 00:57:15,198 As the Italian papers put it, 1087 00:57:15,231 --> 00:57:19,302 they showed a picture of me walking out the gates and saying, 1088 00:57:19,368 --> 00:57:24,207 "The divorce of John Surtees and Enzo." 1089 00:57:26,375 --> 00:57:28,477 With Surtees out of the way, 1090 00:57:28,544 --> 00:57:31,714 the Fords took the top four slots in qualifying. 1091 00:57:31,780 --> 00:57:36,219 And as the clock ticked down, Henry Ford II prepared to drop the flag, 1092 00:57:36,285 --> 00:57:42,124 praying that, this time, he would get his revenge. 1093 00:57:42,225 --> 00:57:45,894 REPORTER: Live from Le Mans, France, it's the 24 Hours of Le Mans. 1094 00:57:47,630 --> 00:57:48,764 (CROWD CHEERING) 1095 00:57:58,707 --> 00:58:01,244 At first, the Fords stormed into the lead. 1096 00:58:01,277 --> 00:58:03,111 But a few hours in, 1097 00:58:03,246 --> 00:58:09,252 it was beginning to look like a depressing repeat of '64 and '65. 1098 00:58:09,252 --> 00:58:12,087 As night fell, the Ferraris, using their greater agility 1099 00:58:12,154 --> 00:58:14,056 and their greater fuel efficiency, 1100 00:58:14,122 --> 00:58:16,158 were leading the race one-two. 1101 00:58:16,259 --> 00:58:22,265 Four of the eight GT40s were out of the race altogether. 1102 00:58:22,298 --> 00:58:27,303 Worse still, the Ford drivers had strict orders not to go balls-out 1103 00:58:27,370 --> 00:58:30,773 for fear of breaking the cars. 1104 00:58:30,839 --> 00:58:33,909 But one man wasn't listening to those orders. 1105 00:58:33,976 --> 00:58:35,844 Ken Miles put the hammer down, 1106 00:58:35,911 --> 00:58:39,515 set blistering lap times, and retook the lead for Ford. 1107 00:58:41,049 --> 00:58:44,287 The Ferraris had no response to this crushing pace, 1108 00:58:44,287 --> 00:58:48,491 and by morning, they had either broken down or crashed. 1109 00:58:50,326 --> 00:58:53,396 That afternoon, Henry Ford watched his cars cruise home 1110 00:58:53,462 --> 00:58:56,799 to a spectacular one-two-three finish. 1111 00:58:59,902 --> 00:59:03,972 REPORTER: First place for the Ford GT Mk II, 1112 00:59:04,039 --> 00:59:08,143 and a first-time win for America at Le Mans. 1113 00:59:08,210 --> 00:59:12,315 JAMES: Ford would go on to win their next four Le Mans races. 1114 00:59:12,315 --> 00:59:15,484 But the man who had contributed so much to the team 1115 00:59:15,551 --> 00:59:17,620 didn't get to see these triumphs. 1116 00:59:17,686 --> 00:59:21,324 Ken Miles was killed two months after their first win, 1117 00:59:21,357 --> 00:59:24,026 testing the latest GT40. 1118 00:59:26,329 --> 00:59:29,932 It's impossible to calculate how much Henry Ford spent 1119 00:59:29,998 --> 00:59:32,601 on his three-year campaign to break Ferrari, 1120 00:59:32,668 --> 00:59:34,903 but experts reckon that, at the very least, 1121 00:59:34,970 --> 00:59:40,409 in today's money, it was £360 million. 1122 00:59:40,476 --> 00:59:44,347 Now, that's a big bill for settling a spat with an angry Italian. 1123 00:59:46,349 --> 00:59:48,884 But look what we got out of it - 1124 00:59:48,951 --> 00:59:51,587 one of the world's greatest cars. 1125 00:59:57,360 --> 00:59:58,561 (CHEERING) 1126 00:59:58,627 --> 01:00:00,095 RICHARD: Very good. 1127 01:00:00,162 --> 01:00:02,064 That was good. Very good. 1128 01:00:08,737 --> 01:00:10,839 -I hate you. -I know. 1129 01:00:10,906 --> 01:00:15,844 No, but I really hate you now, cos you've driven a Ford GT40, and I never have. 1130 01:00:15,911 --> 01:00:18,547 I mean, next week are you gonna lick Helena Christensen? 1131 01:00:18,614 --> 01:00:20,082 -(LAUGHTER) -Look... 1132 01:00:20,148 --> 01:00:23,519 I'm sure you could drive a GT40 if you really wanted to. 1133 01:00:23,586 --> 01:00:25,087 I can't, I'm too tall. 1134 01:00:25,153 --> 01:00:26,989 Yeah, you mean fat. 1135 01:00:27,055 --> 01:00:28,457 (LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE) 1136 01:00:36,499 --> 01:00:38,901 -Tall. -(LAUGHTER) 1137 01:00:38,967 --> 01:00:40,736 Horizontally tall. 1138 01:00:40,803 --> 01:00:41,870 (LAUGHTER) 1139 01:00:41,937 --> 01:00:44,139 Well, listen, whatever dimension is the problem, 1140 01:00:44,206 --> 01:00:45,741 I can't drive one. 1141 01:00:45,808 --> 01:00:48,744 And on that terrible disappointment, it is time to end. 1142 01:00:48,811 --> 01:00:51,313 Thank you so much for watching. Good night. 1143 01:00:51,380 --> 01:00:53,115 (CHEERING)