1 00:00:19,790 --> 00:00:23,694 Hello and welcome to a Grand Tour special, 2 00:00:23,761 --> 00:00:26,697 which begins with this: the Volkswagen Beetle. 3 00:00:26,764 --> 00:00:28,732 It's a car we hate very much 4 00:00:28,799 --> 00:00:32,269 because it appeals only to Nazis and hippies, 5 00:00:32,336 --> 00:00:35,339 and we are neither of those things. 6 00:00:35,406 --> 00:00:37,808 However, if you remove the bodywork 7 00:00:37,875 --> 00:00:40,277 and replace it with something a bit more fun - 8 00:00:40,344 --> 00:00:41,545 something like this-- 9 00:00:41,612 --> 00:00:43,647 you end up with a beach buggy, 10 00:00:43,714 --> 00:00:45,616 and that's brilliant. 11 00:00:45,683 --> 00:00:47,685 We love beach buggies. 12 00:00:47,751 --> 00:00:50,120 However, Mr. Wilman disagrees. 13 00:00:50,187 --> 00:00:52,390 He says that if they'd been any good, 14 00:00:52,456 --> 00:00:53,824 they would have caught on, 15 00:00:53,891 --> 00:00:56,293 and he points out that they didn't. 16 00:00:56,360 --> 00:01:00,097 So he hatched a plan. And it's this: 17 00:01:00,163 --> 00:01:03,667 he said all three of us must buy a Volkswagen Beetle, 18 00:01:03,734 --> 00:01:05,903 turn it into a beach buggy, 19 00:01:05,969 --> 00:01:07,137 and then report with it 20 00:01:07,204 --> 00:01:11,442 to a wild, rugged and extremely remote place-- 21 00:01:11,509 --> 00:01:14,945 here on the coast of Namibia. 22 00:01:34,598 --> 00:01:36,634 (ENGINE RUMBLES) 23 00:01:36,700 --> 00:01:38,536 (SURF GUITAR MUSIC) 24 00:01:38,602 --> 00:01:40,438 This is what I've built. 25 00:01:41,872 --> 00:01:44,241 It's as close as you can possibly get 26 00:01:44,307 --> 00:01:47,445 to the original 1964 beach buggy 27 00:01:47,478 --> 00:01:49,079 built by Bruce Meyers. 28 00:01:51,649 --> 00:01:55,819 Underneath, it is a 1950s Beetle-- 29 00:01:55,886 --> 00:01:57,721 Beetle floorpan, Beetle suspension, 30 00:01:57,788 --> 00:01:59,523 Beetle engine, Beetle gearbox. 31 00:01:59,590 --> 00:02:00,891 It's got Beetle lights on it. 32 00:02:00,958 --> 00:02:02,560 I've even got a Beetle speedometer 33 00:02:02,626 --> 00:02:04,462 and Beetle hubcaps. 34 00:02:05,629 --> 00:02:07,465 It's brilliant! 35 00:02:10,934 --> 00:02:14,805 This is a beach buggy very like the one that Steve McQueen drove 36 00:02:14,872 --> 00:02:16,607 in the original Thomas Crown Affair. 37 00:02:16,674 --> 00:02:18,676 - And if it's good enough-- - (HORN TOOTS) 38 00:02:18,742 --> 00:02:22,279 - Oh, God. - Ha-ha! 39 00:02:22,345 --> 00:02:24,882 I've been joined by the 1970s. 40 00:02:24,948 --> 00:02:27,084 * T.REX: "20th Century Boy" 41 00:02:29,252 --> 00:02:30,521 Yes. 42 00:02:30,588 --> 00:02:34,925 James May has built what a beach buggy was, 43 00:02:34,992 --> 00:02:38,161 what I've built is what a beach buggy can be... 44 00:02:41,098 --> 00:02:43,701 ...if you have a bit of imagination 45 00:02:43,767 --> 00:02:46,504 and some purple metal-flake paint. 46 00:02:46,504 --> 00:02:48,305 Ha-ha-ha-ha! 47 00:02:48,371 --> 00:02:54,177 * Twentieth century toy, I wanna be your boy... * 48 00:02:54,244 --> 00:02:57,681 There, I believe, is the start point of our adventure. 49 00:02:58,949 --> 00:03:02,019 * I wanna be your boy... * 50 00:03:04,688 --> 00:03:07,090 JEREMY: What an extraordinary place. 51 00:03:07,157 --> 00:03:10,694 It's amazing, isn't it? I mean, more seals. 52 00:03:10,761 --> 00:03:13,330 What David Attenborough never told us about those 53 00:03:13,396 --> 00:03:16,266 is how bad they smell. 54 00:03:16,333 --> 00:03:20,671 JEREMY: Sadly, before our nature documentary could go any further, 55 00:03:20,738 --> 00:03:23,841 Richard Hammond emerged from the mist. 56 00:03:23,907 --> 00:03:27,177 Ooh, hello. That's not a beach buggy. 57 00:03:27,244 --> 00:03:30,213 - Is it? - Well, I wouldn't call that... 58 00:03:30,280 --> 00:03:32,583 - Ah-ha! - Oh, geez. 59 00:03:32,650 --> 00:03:34,217 Ladies and gentlemen, Dick-tari! 60 00:03:35,318 --> 00:03:36,554 RICHARD: Behold! 61 00:03:37,555 --> 00:03:38,756 JAMES: What are you wearing? 62 00:03:38,822 --> 00:03:40,558 What are you wearing? 63 00:03:40,558 --> 00:03:41,759 Well, I'm in Africa! 64 00:03:41,825 --> 00:03:43,293 - (JAMES LAUGHS) - These trousers, 65 00:03:43,360 --> 00:03:44,728 did they say in the shop, 66 00:03:44,795 --> 00:03:46,363 "I'm afraid they are yellow, sir"? 67 00:03:46,429 --> 00:03:47,765 When you left, they went, "Yes! 68 00:03:47,831 --> 00:03:50,467 20 years we've had those on the hanger!" 69 00:03:50,568 --> 00:03:51,835 - (THEY LAUGH) - Shut up. 70 00:03:51,902 --> 00:03:53,336 And then we must move over to this. 71 00:03:53,403 --> 00:03:55,172 - Yeah. - We were told 72 00:03:55,238 --> 00:03:57,174 to build beach buggies. 73 00:03:57,240 --> 00:03:58,842 - Yes. - Beach buggies. 74 00:03:58,909 --> 00:04:00,711 JAMES: It's not a beach buggy. JEREMY: It isn't. 75 00:04:00,778 --> 00:04:02,112 RICHARD: It is a beach buggy. 76 00:04:02,179 --> 00:04:03,881 It isn't a beach buggy. It's got a roof! 77 00:04:03,947 --> 00:04:05,616 There's no Beetle in here at all. 78 00:04:05,683 --> 00:04:07,785 Yes, there is. Beetle engine in there. 79 00:04:07,851 --> 00:04:10,821 OK, this space-frame chassis... 80 00:04:10,888 --> 00:04:12,455 - Yeah. - Is it from a Beetle? 81 00:04:12,590 --> 00:04:15,593 - No. - These enormous suspension components 82 00:04:15,659 --> 00:04:17,494 that don't even fit under the bodywork. 83 00:04:17,595 --> 00:04:21,031 - You've got two lots of suspension at the back. - Twin shocks. 84 00:04:21,098 --> 00:04:25,235 - Twin shocks? - I like an off-road sort of vibe. 85 00:04:25,302 --> 00:04:27,470 To get here, we had to drive on a beach. 86 00:04:27,605 --> 00:04:29,072 -Yeah. -Ours have made it. 87 00:04:29,139 --> 00:04:31,374 I didn't need two lots of rear suspension on mine. 88 00:04:31,441 --> 00:04:32,643 Neither did I. 89 00:04:32,710 --> 00:04:34,477 Look, we were told to come to Africa. 90 00:04:34,612 --> 00:04:39,249 If we'd been told to go to Santa Monica Beach, then this, with its... 91 00:04:39,316 --> 00:04:40,317 (JEREMY CLEARS HIS THROAT) 92 00:04:40,383 --> 00:04:42,085 ...incredibly vivid paint... 93 00:04:42,152 --> 00:04:44,321 That's the most metal flake I've ever seen. 94 00:04:44,387 --> 00:04:45,623 Any beach in the world. 95 00:04:45,656 --> 00:04:47,290 Um... 96 00:04:47,357 --> 00:04:49,960 - Hang on, what's that? - That's the engine. 97 00:04:50,027 --> 00:04:52,495 - What engine is it? - V8! 98 00:04:52,630 --> 00:04:54,231 I've put a V8 in a beach buggy! 99 00:04:54,297 --> 00:04:55,532 Well, no, you haven't. 100 00:04:55,633 --> 00:04:57,500 You've parked your beach buggy quite close. 101 00:04:57,635 --> 00:04:58,836 It's not in it! 102 00:04:58,902 --> 00:05:00,203 - It isn't in it. - (RICHARD LAUGHS) No. 103 00:05:00,270 --> 00:05:01,338 You've reversed into a V8, 104 00:05:01,404 --> 00:05:02,706 but not quite hard enough. 105 00:05:02,773 --> 00:05:04,274 It's only gone in a third of the way. 106 00:05:04,341 --> 00:05:06,043 Do you have any idea how difficult it is 107 00:05:06,109 --> 00:05:08,078 to fit a V8 to a beach buggy? 108 00:05:08,145 --> 00:05:09,647 - Well, it doesn't fit! - It's obviously impossible. 109 00:05:09,647 --> 00:05:11,248 Exactly, it's impossible. 110 00:05:11,314 --> 00:05:12,850 This is no ordinary V8. 111 00:05:12,916 --> 00:05:14,284 It started out in life 112 00:05:14,351 --> 00:05:16,419 as a 3.5 litre V8 from a Range Rover, 113 00:05:16,486 --> 00:05:21,558 but I've modified it, so it produces 180 horsepower. 114 00:05:21,659 --> 00:05:23,526 Can I just say, you were doubting 115 00:05:23,661 --> 00:05:25,362 the credibility of mine as a beach buggy. 116 00:05:25,428 --> 00:05:26,764 Yeah. 117 00:05:26,830 --> 00:05:28,498 The defining characteristic of a beach buggy 118 00:05:28,565 --> 00:05:31,101 is an air-cooled, flat-four Beetle engine. 119 00:05:31,168 --> 00:05:32,102 (CLEARS THROAT) 120 00:05:32,169 --> 00:05:33,671 No, that's not an engine, James. 121 00:05:33,671 --> 00:05:34,872 That's just a fan. 122 00:05:34,938 --> 00:05:36,373 How many horsepower does yours have? 123 00:05:36,439 --> 00:05:37,675 94! 124 00:05:37,708 --> 00:05:39,576 So I have twice as many horsepower. 125 00:05:39,677 --> 00:05:41,812 - Shall I tell you something? - They're not in the car, though. 126 00:05:41,879 --> 00:05:43,681 - They are, they're near it. - Yes. 127 00:05:43,681 --> 00:05:46,016 It's interesting, isn't it? I mean, that is an entire-- 128 00:05:46,083 --> 00:05:47,350 Nothing about that is interesting. 129 00:05:47,417 --> 00:05:48,686 This is a blank canvas 130 00:05:48,686 --> 00:05:49,753 onto which you could paint your personality. 131 00:05:49,820 --> 00:05:51,388 - Yes. - Yours has got 132 00:05:51,454 --> 00:05:53,156 a prolapsed V8 hanging out of its backside 133 00:05:53,223 --> 00:05:54,391 and terrible paint. 134 00:05:54,457 --> 00:05:55,793 Mine is a rather magnificent 135 00:05:55,859 --> 00:05:57,160 "Daktari"-themed off-roader. 136 00:05:57,227 --> 00:05:59,562 (LAUGHS) That's got nothing on it! 137 00:05:59,697 --> 00:06:01,298 - You can express... - JEREMY: It is a bit boring. 138 00:06:01,364 --> 00:06:02,966 ...all your personality, and it's standard. 139 00:06:03,033 --> 00:06:04,534 It's not... What do you mean, standard? 140 00:06:04,601 --> 00:06:05,703 It's a beach buggy. 141 00:06:05,769 --> 00:06:07,137 - It's tasteful. - (BLEEPING) 142 00:06:07,204 --> 00:06:08,371 What? 143 00:06:09,707 --> 00:06:12,375 - Oh. - The bat sat-phone. 144 00:06:12,442 --> 00:06:13,911 We've got a message from... 145 00:06:14,778 --> 00:06:15,779 Mr. Wilman. 146 00:06:15,846 --> 00:06:17,114 RICHARD: Right, go on. 147 00:06:17,180 --> 00:06:18,515 "Since you're in beach buggies..." 148 00:06:18,581 --> 00:06:20,183 Well, us two are. 149 00:06:20,250 --> 00:06:22,152 "Since you're in beach buggies, 150 00:06:22,219 --> 00:06:25,322 you will now drive to the beach." 151 00:06:25,388 --> 00:06:26,456 Uh... (LAUGHS) 152 00:06:26,523 --> 00:06:27,624 Uh...do you think 153 00:06:27,725 --> 00:06:29,226 he's taken leave of his senses? 154 00:06:29,292 --> 00:06:31,061 Well, he was never that good at geography, was he? 155 00:06:31,128 --> 00:06:33,163 No, he wasn't. "You'll now drive to the beach." 156 00:06:33,230 --> 00:06:34,564 Hold on. Oh, no, there's more. 157 00:06:34,631 --> 00:06:36,366 "The beach to which you will drive 158 00:06:36,433 --> 00:06:41,438 is located on the crocodile-infested Kunene River 159 00:06:41,504 --> 00:06:46,409 at the northernmost point of Namibia, where it meets Angola. 160 00:06:46,476 --> 00:06:48,445 It's 1,000 miles away." 161 00:06:49,947 --> 00:06:53,450 - 1,000 miles? - 1,000. 162 00:06:53,516 --> 00:06:56,386 JEREMY: What we needed at this point was a map, 163 00:06:56,453 --> 00:06:59,489 so we decided to head north up the coast 164 00:06:59,556 --> 00:07:01,324 and find the nearest town. 165 00:07:01,391 --> 00:07:03,761 JEREMY: Let the journey begin! 166 00:07:03,794 --> 00:07:05,763 (ENGINES REV) 167 00:07:08,165 --> 00:07:11,101 JEREMY: And what a journey it would be in these cars, 168 00:07:11,168 --> 00:07:14,972 cars that were born in interesting times. 169 00:07:16,774 --> 00:07:19,242 So, it's 1964, 170 00:07:19,309 --> 00:07:22,445 the word "teenager" has started to appear 171 00:07:22,512 --> 00:07:23,914 in the world's dictionaries, 172 00:07:23,981 --> 00:07:26,817 people are listening to new types of music, 173 00:07:26,884 --> 00:07:29,953 they're smoking new types of stuff. 174 00:07:30,020 --> 00:07:34,224 And then, in California, the beach buggy arrived! 175 00:07:34,291 --> 00:07:35,492 (ENGINES RUMBLE) 176 00:07:39,462 --> 00:07:40,864 It was perfect! 177 00:07:40,931 --> 00:07:43,600 Girls and boys, beach barbecues... 178 00:07:43,666 --> 00:07:47,170 The first design criteria was that the front fenders were flat, 179 00:07:47,237 --> 00:07:49,472 so you could stand a beer on it. 180 00:07:49,539 --> 00:07:51,308 That's how you design a car! 181 00:07:55,112 --> 00:07:59,817 Jimi Hendrix had a beach buggy and President Nixon didn't. 182 00:07:59,850 --> 00:08:01,819 Tells you all you need to know. 183 00:08:04,221 --> 00:08:07,624 What I really like about the beach buggy is that it's a testament 184 00:08:07,690 --> 00:08:11,261 to the ability of the human spirit to triumph. 185 00:08:11,328 --> 00:08:13,230 Because somebody looked at the Beetle and said, 186 00:08:13,296 --> 00:08:17,634 "Well, that's the legacy of the world's worst dictator. 187 00:08:17,700 --> 00:08:19,536 Let's turn it into a beach car." 188 00:08:23,273 --> 00:08:25,075 JEREMY: After a lonely hour 189 00:08:25,142 --> 00:08:27,277 of driving north through the swirling mist, 190 00:08:27,344 --> 00:08:29,947 we still hadn't found a town, 191 00:08:30,013 --> 00:08:33,150 but we did find something else. 192 00:08:34,451 --> 00:08:35,853 Jesus. 193 00:08:56,539 --> 00:08:57,875 JEREMY: I'll tell you what, 194 00:08:57,941 --> 00:08:59,709 he must have been going at a right old lick 195 00:08:59,776 --> 00:09:00,878 when he hit the beach. 196 00:09:00,878 --> 00:09:02,079 RICHARD: He must have been. 197 00:09:02,145 --> 00:09:04,081 Right, the sea is there. 198 00:09:04,147 --> 00:09:05,715 That's half a mile away. 199 00:09:05,782 --> 00:09:06,783 JAMES: I'd say so. 200 00:09:06,884 --> 00:09:08,118 So he got it up the beach, 201 00:09:08,185 --> 00:09:09,652 and then sort of did a handbrake turn. 202 00:09:09,719 --> 00:09:11,955 -Power-slided it in. -How do you do a handbrake... 203 00:09:12,022 --> 00:09:14,324 RICHARD: How did it get here, seriously? 204 00:09:14,391 --> 00:09:17,127 Can I just say... my nipples are erect. 205 00:09:17,194 --> 00:09:19,496 - What, 'cause of this jacket? - No. 206 00:09:19,562 --> 00:09:20,898 - Oh. - It's cold. 207 00:09:20,931 --> 00:09:23,333 - It is, isn't it? - It's cold. 208 00:09:23,400 --> 00:09:25,702 That's an unwise wardrobe strategy. 209 00:09:25,768 --> 00:09:26,937 Yeah, well, you know, 210 00:09:27,004 --> 00:09:29,206 Africa, on a beach, I thought... 211 00:09:29,272 --> 00:09:31,041 - So did I. - I'm surprised. 212 00:09:32,509 --> 00:09:35,578 The beach has got the sea haar on it - 213 00:09:35,645 --> 00:09:37,414 mist, fog, cold. 214 00:09:37,480 --> 00:09:40,583 - If you look over there... - Hm. 215 00:09:40,650 --> 00:09:42,285 ...sunshine, blue sky. 216 00:09:42,352 --> 00:09:44,922 - Why don't we just go inland... - The coast road. 217 00:09:44,922 --> 00:09:47,624 Find the coast road which will take us to a town. 218 00:09:47,690 --> 00:09:49,993 And that'll be in the sun. That's a better idea. 219 00:09:51,194 --> 00:09:52,595 JEREMY: With a plan worked out, 220 00:09:52,662 --> 00:09:54,932 it was time to get moving again. 221 00:09:54,965 --> 00:09:57,100 (ENGINE IGNITION FAILS) 222 00:09:59,036 --> 00:10:00,337 Oh, dear. 223 00:10:00,403 --> 00:10:02,439 JAMES: Did you modify the battery as well? 224 00:10:02,505 --> 00:10:04,574 - (IGNITION FAILS) - RICHARD: Oh... 225 00:10:04,641 --> 00:10:08,045 - It's obviously not charging up. - No. 226 00:10:08,111 --> 00:10:09,846 Because I didn't modify it. 227 00:10:09,913 --> 00:10:11,014 Yeah. 228 00:10:11,081 --> 00:10:12,782 I'll just see if mine works. 229 00:10:12,849 --> 00:10:14,317 (ENGINE STARTS) 230 00:10:14,384 --> 00:10:16,719 - Oh, yeah. - Let me just try mine. 231 00:10:16,786 --> 00:10:19,022 - (ENGINE STARTS) - Yeah. 232 00:10:19,089 --> 00:10:21,158 - Push? - Hm? 233 00:10:21,224 --> 00:10:24,394 - Can I have a push? - (ENGINES REV) 234 00:10:31,501 --> 00:10:34,237 JEREMY: After the film crew had got me going, 235 00:10:34,304 --> 00:10:38,241 I used my massive horsepower to catch the others. 236 00:10:44,547 --> 00:10:47,517 But by the time we were back together again... 237 00:10:48,718 --> 00:10:50,653 it was going dark. 238 00:10:50,720 --> 00:10:54,457 The sun, as you can see over my shoulder, has set, 239 00:10:54,524 --> 00:10:56,994 and we still haven't found a road. 240 00:10:57,060 --> 00:11:00,363 It's also going to be very, very, very cold. 241 00:11:02,032 --> 00:11:03,366 Lights on. 242 00:11:10,640 --> 00:11:12,709 RICHARD: We have got to find this road. 243 00:11:14,177 --> 00:11:16,146 This is not going to be too clever... 244 00:11:17,414 --> 00:11:18,681 in the dark. 245 00:11:25,188 --> 00:11:27,390 I've rather crudely rigged up my torch, 246 00:11:27,457 --> 00:11:30,193 wedged in the windscreen rail, 247 00:11:30,260 --> 00:11:34,264 in the hope that you can see my last pieces to camera. 248 00:11:38,101 --> 00:11:39,736 Oh, bollocks! 249 00:11:42,572 --> 00:11:44,041 (INHALES SHARPLY) 250 00:11:44,107 --> 00:11:45,675 Oh, cold! 251 00:11:49,312 --> 00:11:50,647 JEREMY: Finally, though, 252 00:11:50,713 --> 00:11:53,950 it looked like our luck had changed. 253 00:11:54,051 --> 00:11:55,918 Ooh, hello! Hello! 254 00:11:56,053 --> 00:11:57,387 What's that? 255 00:12:03,893 --> 00:12:05,595 - It's not a hotel. - No. 256 00:12:08,065 --> 00:12:09,732 It smells of excrement! 257 00:12:09,799 --> 00:12:10,900 JAMES: Oh, wow, look at this! 258 00:12:10,967 --> 00:12:13,070 There's still, like, plates 259 00:12:13,070 --> 00:12:14,471 and cups and saucers and things in here. 260 00:12:14,537 --> 00:12:16,139 I'll tell you exactly what this is. 261 00:12:16,206 --> 00:12:17,574 It's an abandoned mine. 262 00:12:17,640 --> 00:12:18,675 (JEREMY SNIFFS) 263 00:12:18,741 --> 00:12:20,943 They do mine round in Namibia, don't they? 264 00:12:21,078 --> 00:12:22,212 What do they mine for? 265 00:12:22,279 --> 00:12:23,813 - Diamonds. - Diamonds? 266 00:12:23,880 --> 00:12:26,516 Yeah, but they wouldn't have left if there were any. 267 00:12:26,583 --> 00:12:28,785 They obviously left, and not yesterday. 268 00:12:31,488 --> 00:12:34,724 Look, there's no road here, is there? 269 00:12:34,791 --> 00:12:35,758 - No. - No. 270 00:12:35,825 --> 00:12:37,194 Apart from anything else, 271 00:12:37,260 --> 00:12:38,895 we can't find our way around in the dark 272 00:12:38,961 --> 00:12:39,996 'cause we can't navigate. 273 00:12:40,097 --> 00:12:41,598 - Well, I can. - How? 274 00:12:41,664 --> 00:12:43,233 - How? - Stars. 275 00:12:43,300 --> 00:12:44,667 - No, you can't. - I can. 276 00:12:44,734 --> 00:12:48,105 I can't do very many things, I admit... 277 00:12:48,105 --> 00:12:50,107 ...anything, but I can do that. 278 00:12:50,173 --> 00:12:51,841 How do you navigate by the stars? 279 00:12:51,908 --> 00:12:53,243 Uh... find the Southern Cross. 280 00:12:53,310 --> 00:12:54,844 Yeah, but that's really complicated. 281 00:12:54,911 --> 00:12:57,547 Right, do you want to sleep in the excrement mine? 282 00:12:57,614 --> 00:12:58,915 No, this is out. 283 00:12:58,981 --> 00:13:00,650 So, we have to keep going, 284 00:13:00,717 --> 00:13:02,885 whether we like it or not, till we find... 285 00:13:02,952 --> 00:13:04,521 We have to, so listen. 286 00:13:04,587 --> 00:13:07,023 I shall find the Southern Cross. 287 00:13:07,124 --> 00:13:09,359 You can't find the Southern Cross with a hammer. 288 00:13:09,426 --> 00:13:12,229 I've found it! Ha! I've found it. It's there. 289 00:13:12,295 --> 00:13:13,830 It's like a kite. 290 00:13:13,896 --> 00:13:15,265 - That one there? - Yeah. 291 00:13:15,332 --> 00:13:17,134 It's a kite shape. It's sort of... 292 00:13:17,200 --> 00:13:21,003 Now, you take the long axis, yes? 293 00:13:21,138 --> 00:13:22,139 - Yes. - Mm-hm. 294 00:13:22,172 --> 00:13:24,274 And draw an imaginary line 295 00:13:24,341 --> 00:13:27,744 through it, down to the horizon. 296 00:13:27,810 --> 00:13:29,346 Yes? Now, you intersect it 297 00:13:29,412 --> 00:13:32,482 from a line drawn between two other stars, 298 00:13:32,549 --> 00:13:35,318 and where those two imaginary lines meet, 299 00:13:35,385 --> 00:13:38,888 directly underneath it is due south. 300 00:13:38,955 --> 00:13:40,923 So if it's those two-- 301 00:13:40,990 --> 00:13:42,725 which it is, I'm sure of it-- 302 00:13:42,792 --> 00:13:44,761 you draw a line... 303 00:13:44,827 --> 00:13:46,763 (ENGINE RUMBLES) 304 00:13:50,066 --> 00:13:52,669 Oh, this is a bad idea! 305 00:13:52,735 --> 00:13:55,405 We are now trusting our lives to an orangutan 306 00:13:55,472 --> 00:13:57,274 who thinks he's Patrick Moore. 307 00:13:59,609 --> 00:14:02,879 There it is. There's the two stars. 308 00:14:04,181 --> 00:14:06,983 Draw a line... 309 00:14:07,049 --> 00:14:10,453 I'm not getting many directions from you, Jeremy. Is this right? 310 00:14:10,520 --> 00:14:13,190 You're heading a little bit too much to the right. 311 00:14:13,256 --> 00:14:15,292 You need to go left a bit. 312 00:14:15,358 --> 00:14:18,261 Good, good. Oh, I'm so confident. 313 00:14:18,328 --> 00:14:23,566 You two are going to be eating humble pie when the sun comes up. 314 00:14:27,437 --> 00:14:29,105 RICHARD: Despite the confidence 315 00:14:29,206 --> 00:14:30,873 of Jeremy Columbus, 316 00:14:30,940 --> 00:14:33,310 no road appeared. 317 00:14:34,944 --> 00:14:36,346 Oh, this is grim. 318 00:14:40,317 --> 00:14:42,585 Excuse me. 319 00:14:42,652 --> 00:14:45,688 I've been on the go a very, very long time now. 320 00:14:47,924 --> 00:14:52,395 RICHARD: Guys, I'm sorry. I'm not driving another inch. 321 00:14:52,462 --> 00:14:54,264 I can't do this. 322 00:14:54,331 --> 00:14:55,765 It's three o'clock in the morning. 323 00:14:55,832 --> 00:14:57,234 I'm exhausted. 324 00:14:57,234 --> 00:14:59,736 JEREMY: He does have a point. 325 00:15:06,108 --> 00:15:07,610 RICHARD: The next morning, 326 00:15:07,677 --> 00:15:10,313 we woke, having slept on the sand, 327 00:15:10,380 --> 00:15:12,915 huddled round our engines for warmth. 328 00:15:17,254 --> 00:15:19,322 (ENGINE STARTS) 329 00:15:29,399 --> 00:15:31,734 (INDISTINCT SHOUTING) 330 00:15:34,371 --> 00:15:35,938 (HORN TOOTS) 331 00:15:41,411 --> 00:15:43,580 JAMES: You muppet. What's that? 332 00:15:43,646 --> 00:15:44,647 Um... 333 00:15:45,982 --> 00:15:48,285 "Um" what? 334 00:15:48,318 --> 00:15:51,354 I never knew Namibia had two seas. 335 00:15:51,421 --> 00:15:52,789 It doesn't have two seas. 336 00:15:52,855 --> 00:15:54,457 No, it has one massive "cee" in it. 337 00:15:54,524 --> 00:15:55,925 One massive, stupid "cee" 338 00:15:55,992 --> 00:15:57,927 that's navigated us back to where we started. 339 00:15:57,994 --> 00:15:59,996 - Can I just say... - It wasn't my... I... 340 00:16:00,062 --> 00:16:02,299 Why did we even believe you could navigate by the stars? 341 00:16:02,365 --> 00:16:03,700 You can't even read a compass. 342 00:16:03,766 --> 00:16:06,369 There are two "cees". There's two "cees" here 343 00:16:06,436 --> 00:16:08,538 for believing that that "cee" could navigate us. 344 00:16:08,605 --> 00:16:10,640 - No, you're right. - I couldn't possibly... 345 00:16:10,707 --> 00:16:13,142 Really, I don't understand that. 346 00:16:13,209 --> 00:16:16,045 JAMES: Freezing cold, sandpapered on the face... 347 00:16:16,112 --> 00:16:18,548 - You've got a coat on. - It's thin. Have you felt it? 348 00:16:18,615 --> 00:16:20,450 I haven't even got a thin coat. 349 00:16:20,517 --> 00:16:21,851 I've only got a T-shirt. Anyway, 350 00:16:21,918 --> 00:16:23,420 I'm not going to be competitive with you 351 00:16:23,486 --> 00:16:24,821 about who's the coldest. 352 00:16:24,887 --> 00:16:26,723 - I'm the coldest! - We're all the lostest. 353 00:16:26,789 --> 00:16:29,091 Never mind. Look, let's not get bogged down 354 00:16:29,158 --> 00:16:30,493 with whose fault it was. 355 00:16:30,560 --> 00:16:32,429 There's no being bogged down with it, is there? 356 00:16:32,495 --> 00:16:34,397 It was yours. 357 00:16:34,464 --> 00:16:36,232 We can either go back into the desert 358 00:16:36,333 --> 00:16:37,834 to look for a road, 359 00:16:37,900 --> 00:16:40,236 or we can just do what we were doing yesterday, 360 00:16:40,337 --> 00:16:41,804 and stay on the beach. 361 00:16:41,871 --> 00:16:44,240 At least we know, if we keep the sea on our left, 362 00:16:44,341 --> 00:16:45,508 we're going north. 363 00:16:45,575 --> 00:16:46,943 - Yes. - That's a fair point. 364 00:16:47,009 --> 00:16:49,512 - Let's navigate by the sea. - JEREMY: Yes. 365 00:16:50,813 --> 00:16:53,383 JEREMY: With our new-- well, newish-- 366 00:16:53,450 --> 00:16:54,584 plan in place, 367 00:16:54,651 --> 00:16:56,453 we set off once more. 368 00:16:58,054 --> 00:17:02,024 So here we are. These are our wheel marks from yesterday. 369 00:17:03,225 --> 00:17:06,663 24 hours of cold, misery... 370 00:17:06,729 --> 00:17:08,698 to achieve exactly nothing. 371 00:17:08,765 --> 00:17:11,401 I mean, it is exactly nothing. 372 00:17:11,468 --> 00:17:14,771 But, apart from that and the weather... 373 00:17:14,837 --> 00:17:19,676 and Jeremy Clarkson, it's all going really well. 374 00:17:19,742 --> 00:17:21,544 JEREMY: As we continued north, 375 00:17:21,611 --> 00:17:24,046 the misery of the previous day was banished 376 00:17:24,113 --> 00:17:27,850 by the sheer bigness of our surroundings. 377 00:17:27,917 --> 00:17:30,853 Oh, this is an astonishing place. 378 00:17:33,823 --> 00:17:37,727 I've got a dune the size of Mount Everest to my right, 379 00:17:37,794 --> 00:17:40,997 the Atlantic Ocean to my left... 380 00:17:41,063 --> 00:17:42,131 (LAUGHS) 381 00:17:42,198 --> 00:17:44,967 This is absolutely epic. 382 00:17:53,576 --> 00:17:55,412 This is proper beach buggy driving. 383 00:17:55,478 --> 00:17:58,881 Sun's out, sea's there with the surf. 384 00:17:58,948 --> 00:18:00,850 It's like being in the Beach Boys. 385 00:18:03,420 --> 00:18:05,622 (LAUGHS) 386 00:18:05,688 --> 00:18:07,824 JEREMY: Amidst all this loveliness, though, 387 00:18:07,890 --> 00:18:13,095 there was one small elephant edging its way into the room. 388 00:18:13,162 --> 00:18:14,997 Chaps, I don't want to have to say this, 389 00:18:15,064 --> 00:18:18,501 but is the tide coming in or going out? 390 00:18:20,437 --> 00:18:22,972 RICHARD: Uh...I'm guessing in. 391 00:18:25,074 --> 00:18:27,577 There's no way up the sides of that. 392 00:18:28,811 --> 00:18:32,281 And if the tide comes in that far, which it does, 393 00:18:32,348 --> 00:18:34,451 we've had it. 394 00:18:34,517 --> 00:18:36,085 Got to keep moving here. 395 00:18:36,152 --> 00:18:37,787 We cannot afford to get stuck. 396 00:18:42,024 --> 00:18:44,461 JEREMY: With some generous use of the throttle, 397 00:18:44,461 --> 00:18:45,895 we managed to get clear 398 00:18:45,962 --> 00:18:48,865 of the sea-and-sand-dune pincer movement. 399 00:18:48,931 --> 00:18:51,901 But then we had another problem. 400 00:18:54,871 --> 00:18:56,973 I'd say that was the end of the beach. 401 00:18:58,207 --> 00:19:00,042 RICHARD: How does that just end like that? 402 00:19:00,109 --> 00:19:01,978 JEREMY: It does just end. JAMES: That is the end. 403 00:19:02,044 --> 00:19:04,313 JEREMY: And the Namibian government doesn't allow us 404 00:19:04,380 --> 00:19:06,949 to drive on the salt pans, and that's what that is. 405 00:19:07,016 --> 00:19:08,585 This meant, according to James, 406 00:19:08,651 --> 00:19:11,954 we had only one option. 407 00:19:12,021 --> 00:19:13,823 We've got to go back the way we came. 408 00:19:13,890 --> 00:19:15,257 But if the tide's coming in, 409 00:19:15,324 --> 00:19:18,595 that narrow bit will have become impassable. 410 00:19:18,661 --> 00:19:22,298 That's why I think if we see a good opportunity to turn left, 411 00:19:22,364 --> 00:19:24,634 like we did last night, we do it. 412 00:19:24,701 --> 00:19:26,669 Are you honestly suggesting we go back in the... 413 00:19:26,736 --> 00:19:28,505 Well, where else can we go? 414 00:19:28,505 --> 00:19:30,607 We'll either drown or starve otherwise. 415 00:19:36,513 --> 00:19:37,947 Right, we've just got to find a bit 416 00:19:38,014 --> 00:19:42,018 where we can get inland before the tide comes in. 417 00:19:47,557 --> 00:19:50,092 That is getting closer to that, 418 00:19:50,159 --> 00:19:51,894 and when that happens, we've had it. 419 00:19:56,533 --> 00:19:58,234 RICHARD: But as we thundered along, 420 00:19:58,300 --> 00:20:01,738 the dunes refused to open up and let us in. 421 00:20:03,405 --> 00:20:04,774 That's the sea! 422 00:20:05,675 --> 00:20:07,544 It's the sea, there! 423 00:20:09,245 --> 00:20:10,780 Oh, it's coming at me! 424 00:20:12,481 --> 00:20:15,852 JEREMY: I still say we can't get out here, look. 425 00:20:15,918 --> 00:20:17,820 No left turn at the moment. 426 00:20:21,724 --> 00:20:23,993 This is where you need a V8! 427 00:20:24,060 --> 00:20:25,261 (ENGINE REVS) 428 00:20:27,463 --> 00:20:28,665 Oh, shit. 429 00:20:30,099 --> 00:20:32,602 Oh, Jeremy's in trouble! 430 00:20:32,669 --> 00:20:34,370 That is not looking good! 431 00:20:34,436 --> 00:20:35,638 (ENGINE REVS) 432 00:20:35,705 --> 00:20:37,373 Come on, come on. Whoa. 433 00:20:37,439 --> 00:20:39,141 (ENGINE REVS) 434 00:20:39,208 --> 00:20:40,977 Oh, no. 435 00:20:41,043 --> 00:20:43,112 (ENGINE REVS) 436 00:20:43,179 --> 00:20:45,915 Oh, no. No, no, no. Not a good place. 437 00:20:45,982 --> 00:20:48,384 - (ENGINE REVS) - Oh, God. 438 00:20:48,450 --> 00:20:50,086 Uh...I'm in the sea. 439 00:20:51,654 --> 00:20:53,723 Because it was a bit of an emergency, 440 00:20:53,790 --> 00:20:56,525 my colleagues decided to help for once. 441 00:20:56,593 --> 00:20:59,328 - Go. - (ENGINE WHIRRS) 442 00:20:59,395 --> 00:21:00,462 JAMES: No. 443 00:21:00,529 --> 00:21:02,164 Is that just spinning? 444 00:21:02,231 --> 00:21:03,800 It's beached under there. 445 00:21:03,866 --> 00:21:05,768 I don't see why I can't push him with that. 446 00:21:05,835 --> 00:21:08,070 -All right, then. Try. -All right. 447 00:21:08,137 --> 00:21:09,839 James, count us in. 448 00:21:09,906 --> 00:21:12,308 Three, two, one, away! 449 00:21:17,914 --> 00:21:20,617 JEREMY: Yes! RICHARD: Right, let's go! 450 00:21:22,619 --> 00:21:27,356 Me getting beached cost us time we never had in the first place, 451 00:21:27,423 --> 00:21:29,692 and we were still trapped. 452 00:21:33,095 --> 00:21:34,330 Jesus Christ. 453 00:21:36,398 --> 00:21:38,100 Ah, it's coming in. 454 00:21:41,771 --> 00:21:43,940 Come on, come on, come on. 455 00:21:45,474 --> 00:21:46,776 Come on. 456 00:21:48,310 --> 00:21:49,345 Whoa! 457 00:21:54,651 --> 00:21:55,885 Oh! 458 00:21:57,519 --> 00:21:58,788 Oh, that's bad. 459 00:22:02,458 --> 00:22:03,492 Shit. 460 00:22:03,559 --> 00:22:04,994 (ENGINE REVS) 461 00:22:06,195 --> 00:22:07,263 Whoa! 462 00:22:09,899 --> 00:22:11,367 Come on, baby, come on. 463 00:22:13,670 --> 00:22:17,774 RICHARD: Mercifully, the dunes finally started to fall away 464 00:22:17,840 --> 00:22:19,842 and we were saved. 465 00:22:22,779 --> 00:22:25,782 -And we're through! -We are, we are. 466 00:22:25,848 --> 00:22:27,149 That's a relief. 467 00:22:29,786 --> 00:22:31,353 So nearly got stuck then. 468 00:22:34,957 --> 00:22:37,927 RICHARD: We'd now been on the go for 36 hours, 469 00:22:37,994 --> 00:22:42,932 and we were pretty much back where we started from... again. 470 00:22:42,999 --> 00:22:45,935 We were also soaked, frozen, worn out, 471 00:22:46,002 --> 00:22:47,937 and because we had no food with us, 472 00:22:48,004 --> 00:22:50,072 we were also hungry. 473 00:22:50,139 --> 00:22:53,976 But then Bear Clarkson came to the rescue. 474 00:22:54,043 --> 00:22:57,513 Cold you go and get some driftwood for a fire? 475 00:22:57,579 --> 00:23:01,450 And could you fashion a rudimentary barbecue grill of some sort? 476 00:23:01,517 --> 00:23:03,986 OK. Where did you get the fishing rod from? 477 00:23:04,053 --> 00:23:06,155 It's my whip aerial. It's a beach buggy. 478 00:23:06,222 --> 00:23:08,424 - I thought of that. - They're fishing rods. 479 00:23:16,065 --> 00:23:18,868 This is going to make a perfect little fish grill thing, look. 480 00:23:23,873 --> 00:23:25,407 Have you got a fire lit yet? 481 00:23:25,474 --> 00:23:26,743 I thought you were fishing. 482 00:23:26,743 --> 00:23:29,011 I am fishing. My car's fishing. 483 00:23:29,078 --> 00:23:31,113 - Look. - Well, is it? 484 00:23:31,180 --> 00:23:33,349 - Yeah, look, I've got the rods attached. - It's parked. 485 00:23:33,415 --> 00:23:35,284 JEREMY: What's that? JAMES: That's the grill. 486 00:23:35,351 --> 00:23:37,920 So we hold that with the pliers from my multi-tool, 487 00:23:37,987 --> 00:23:39,922 cut the fish up, fillet it... 488 00:23:39,989 --> 00:23:43,826 Can you do that? There's no point asking him. He can open a tin... 489 00:23:43,893 --> 00:23:45,294 Can you fillet a fish? 490 00:23:45,361 --> 00:23:47,429 - What, is it only fish? - Well, it's the sea! 491 00:23:47,496 --> 00:23:50,099 What did you think I was going to catch, a chicken? 492 00:23:50,166 --> 00:23:51,333 Oh, my God! 493 00:23:56,538 --> 00:23:59,776 RICHARD: Oh, my God! JAMES: No, wait. Yes! 494 00:23:59,776 --> 00:24:01,978 Ha-ha-ha-ha! 495 00:24:02,044 --> 00:24:04,313 While Hammond went off to get more driftwood, 496 00:24:04,380 --> 00:24:07,884 James and I set about gutting the catch. 497 00:24:07,950 --> 00:24:11,553 JEREMY: Use his car as the table. There we go. 498 00:24:11,620 --> 00:24:14,690 - That's his gut. Look. You've got it. - Yeah, right. 499 00:24:14,791 --> 00:24:16,292 Oh, God. Shit. Look, 500 00:24:16,358 --> 00:24:18,127 it's all gone literally onto his exhaust. 501 00:24:18,194 --> 00:24:20,629 Oh, no. Never mind. Look, I need your help. 502 00:24:20,696 --> 00:24:22,064 Right, saw its head off. 503 00:24:24,000 --> 00:24:27,136 - Ah, there we go. - Excellent. 504 00:24:27,203 --> 00:24:29,405 - I think, but I'm not sure-- - It's gone under his seat. 505 00:24:29,471 --> 00:24:30,706 Oh, no. Has it? 506 00:24:30,807 --> 00:24:32,341 It's all right, I'll get it out later. 507 00:24:36,445 --> 00:24:38,447 JAMES: Oh, it's done a treat, this. 508 00:24:38,514 --> 00:24:40,149 Look at this, Hammond. 509 00:24:42,518 --> 00:24:44,720 Mm. 510 00:24:44,821 --> 00:24:46,155 Oh, that's all right, isn't it? 511 00:24:48,290 --> 00:24:49,425 Ooh. 512 00:24:54,997 --> 00:24:56,833 It tastes like fish, doesn't it? 513 00:24:58,000 --> 00:25:00,102 OK, does anybody want a beer? 514 00:25:01,303 --> 00:25:02,671 - JAMES: Have you got some? - No. 515 00:25:02,738 --> 00:25:05,241 - Oh, you... - (JEREMY LAUGHS) 516 00:25:05,307 --> 00:25:07,910 - That deserves a stabbing. - (THEY LAUGH) 517 00:25:07,977 --> 00:25:09,045 That is a proper stabbing. 518 00:25:09,111 --> 00:25:10,379 That's properly out of order. 519 00:25:14,116 --> 00:25:15,451 RICHARD: After lunch, 520 00:25:15,517 --> 00:25:18,120 we set off once more into the dunes. 521 00:25:20,422 --> 00:25:23,092 Right, so let's keep heading east. 522 00:25:23,159 --> 00:25:26,095 And we must come to a road at some... 523 00:25:26,162 --> 00:25:28,898 There has to be a road. 524 00:25:28,965 --> 00:25:31,868 JEREMY: But, for mile after mile, 525 00:25:31,868 --> 00:25:33,169 there wasn't. 526 00:25:44,780 --> 00:25:46,315 It's the Namib Desert. 527 00:25:46,382 --> 00:25:51,253 "Namib" in the local dialect means "big nothing". 528 00:25:56,425 --> 00:26:00,529 It must be the prettiest desert in the world. 529 00:26:00,596 --> 00:26:02,364 It's just a sea of dunes. 530 00:26:07,569 --> 00:26:10,639 JEREMY: Dunes which were getting bigger. 531 00:26:10,706 --> 00:26:14,243 JAMES: Bloody Nora, look at the size of that! 532 00:26:16,212 --> 00:26:20,549 Engaging 180 horsepower. 533 00:26:20,616 --> 00:26:23,652 JEREMY: Climbing them in our two-wheel-drive beach buggies 534 00:26:23,719 --> 00:26:25,354 was becoming tricky. 535 00:26:27,256 --> 00:26:32,461 Come on, you can do this. You can do this! 536 00:26:32,528 --> 00:26:37,566 But by deploying the V8, I was sort of all right. 537 00:26:37,633 --> 00:26:38,734 Yes! 538 00:26:38,800 --> 00:26:41,637 Oh-ho-ho-ho! 539 00:26:41,703 --> 00:26:45,841 Hammond had grippy tyres, so he was all right, too. 540 00:26:45,942 --> 00:26:48,510 Please, make it. Please. 541 00:26:48,577 --> 00:26:49,845 (ENGINE REVS) 542 00:26:49,946 --> 00:26:51,180 Please! 543 00:26:53,315 --> 00:26:54,650 Ho-ho! 544 00:26:54,716 --> 00:26:56,218 There you go! 545 00:26:56,285 --> 00:26:59,255 However, back in the 1960s... 546 00:27:02,024 --> 00:27:04,260 Come on, little car. 547 00:27:04,326 --> 00:27:06,695 - (ENGINE SPLUTTERS) - Oh, no, no, no. 548 00:27:06,762 --> 00:27:07,829 No, no. 549 00:27:07,964 --> 00:27:09,598 (ENGINE REVS) 550 00:27:12,434 --> 00:27:13,970 (ENGINE REVS) 551 00:27:19,441 --> 00:27:20,676 - Stuck? - Yes. 552 00:27:20,742 --> 00:27:22,378 Two problems. Number one, 553 00:27:22,444 --> 00:27:24,981 he's put a 90 horsepower engine in it, 554 00:27:24,981 --> 00:27:26,715 which actually is probably only 40. 555 00:27:26,782 --> 00:27:28,117 - Yeah. - And number two, 556 00:27:28,184 --> 00:27:30,987 he will not use full power ever. 557 00:27:31,020 --> 00:27:34,590 Well, he's got a 90 horsepower engine, but a 5 horsepower foot. 558 00:27:34,656 --> 00:27:36,358 (JEREMY LAUGHS) 559 00:27:36,425 --> 00:27:39,395 And I bet you any money he's saying "I had a misfire." 560 00:27:39,461 --> 00:27:40,496 (LAUGHS) 561 00:27:47,269 --> 00:27:49,105 You've got to push the accelerator all the way to-- 562 00:27:49,171 --> 00:27:50,406 I know, but... I know that. 563 00:27:50,472 --> 00:27:52,608 It occasionally has a little misfire moment, 564 00:27:52,674 --> 00:27:53,842 and then I lose it. 565 00:27:53,909 --> 00:27:55,677 - (THEY LAUGH) - He said it! 566 00:27:58,114 --> 00:28:00,616 JEREMY: And so the afternoon continued. 567 00:28:00,682 --> 00:28:04,820 The Grunt Machine and the Grit Machine would forge ahead... 568 00:28:04,886 --> 00:28:08,724 There is no way in hell I'm doing this! 569 00:28:08,790 --> 00:28:10,426 Yes! 570 00:28:13,929 --> 00:28:15,831 You star! 571 00:28:15,897 --> 00:28:17,199 ...and then there'd be 572 00:28:17,266 --> 00:28:20,069 the inevitable radio exchange. 573 00:28:20,136 --> 00:28:22,104 We appear to be a man down, Jeremy. 574 00:28:22,171 --> 00:28:24,673 JEREMY: James May, where are you? 575 00:28:24,740 --> 00:28:26,142 (ENGINE REVS) 576 00:28:29,678 --> 00:28:31,680 JEREMY: Because we spent so much time 577 00:28:31,747 --> 00:28:34,316 waiting for Captain Misfire, 578 00:28:34,383 --> 00:28:37,486 we were still in the desert as dusk fell. 579 00:28:37,553 --> 00:28:41,590 And failing light meant it was hard to spot obstacles. 580 00:28:43,192 --> 00:28:44,893 Right, sit rep. 581 00:28:44,960 --> 00:28:48,297 Jesus (BLEEP) Christ! 582 00:28:48,364 --> 00:28:51,067 - (RICHARD LAUGHS) - Holy... 583 00:28:51,133 --> 00:28:53,469 (CONTINUES LAUGHING) 584 00:28:53,535 --> 00:28:55,971 - (BLEEP) - Oh, my God! 585 00:28:56,072 --> 00:28:58,707 - (RICHARD LAUGHS) - Oh, shit! 586 00:28:58,774 --> 00:29:00,709 RICHARD: Look at it! 587 00:29:00,776 --> 00:29:02,711 Mate, I've got to have a look. 588 00:29:05,681 --> 00:29:08,484 Oh, shitty death... 589 00:29:10,386 --> 00:29:13,289 - I locked up. That was just... - Look, he's buried! 590 00:29:13,355 --> 00:29:16,958 - You've buried the front. - I was completely locked up. 591 00:29:17,093 --> 00:29:18,527 'Cause I would have gone down that. 592 00:29:18,594 --> 00:29:20,096 - (RICHARD LAUGHS) - Look at it! 593 00:29:20,162 --> 00:29:22,631 (RICHARD EXCLAIMS) 594 00:29:22,698 --> 00:29:25,634 My close shave was a reminder that, after dark, 595 00:29:25,701 --> 00:29:29,438 these dunes would become very, very dangerous. 596 00:29:34,810 --> 00:29:37,913 RICHARD: It's getting harder and harder to read the terrain now. 597 00:29:37,979 --> 00:29:39,548 Is that a drop? Is that a hill? 598 00:29:39,615 --> 00:29:42,118 Is that going up? Is that a cliff? What is it? 599 00:29:44,253 --> 00:29:46,288 Peril... peril. 600 00:29:47,723 --> 00:29:49,258 Oh, shit! 601 00:29:49,325 --> 00:29:51,227 Oh, I think there's a drop off there. 602 00:29:52,261 --> 00:29:54,029 It's just a black abyss. 603 00:29:54,130 --> 00:29:57,366 That could be a huge cliff again. 604 00:30:00,269 --> 00:30:02,538 RICHARD: Eventually, we could take no more, 605 00:30:02,604 --> 00:30:07,543 and we had to settle down for a second night around our engines. 606 00:30:07,609 --> 00:30:08,777 (SIGHS) 607 00:30:30,832 --> 00:30:33,969 We will find a road. There must... 608 00:30:34,035 --> 00:30:36,772 - It can't... It can't go on forever, can it? - No. 609 00:30:36,838 --> 00:30:40,742 It has to... There will be a town, a road... something. 610 00:30:43,212 --> 00:30:46,382 RICHARD: Unfortunately, to find salvation, 611 00:30:46,448 --> 00:30:50,519 we still had to climb more dunes. 612 00:30:50,586 --> 00:30:54,223 Climb them and then get down the other side. 613 00:30:54,290 --> 00:30:55,691 Oh, my God! 614 00:30:57,926 --> 00:30:59,461 Well, that's just a cliff! 615 00:31:01,330 --> 00:31:03,599 Whoa! Aargh! 616 00:31:07,636 --> 00:31:09,238 (GRUNTS) 617 00:31:10,272 --> 00:31:13,375 Whoa, this is a monster. 618 00:31:13,442 --> 00:31:16,945 Oh! (BLEEP) I don't think I can do...! 619 00:31:17,012 --> 00:31:19,648 Whoa-ho-ho-ho! 620 00:31:24,720 --> 00:31:28,357 Whoa-a-a-a-a-a! 621 00:31:31,327 --> 00:31:32,594 Here we go. 622 00:31:32,661 --> 00:31:35,397 All three of us simultaneously... 623 00:31:39,235 --> 00:31:40,669 Holy shit. 624 00:31:40,736 --> 00:31:43,339 Oh-h-h-h, shit! 625 00:31:43,405 --> 00:31:46,708 Argh-hhh! Ha-ha! 626 00:31:46,775 --> 00:31:49,678 Whoa-a-a-a-a! 627 00:31:51,280 --> 00:31:52,614 I wasn't scared. 628 00:31:57,052 --> 00:31:58,487 Oh, my God. 629 00:31:58,554 --> 00:32:01,957 Guys, this is the biggest yet by a country mile. 630 00:32:03,959 --> 00:32:07,263 Whoa-a-a-a-a-a! 631 00:32:07,263 --> 00:32:08,730 Is that the size of the drop 632 00:32:08,797 --> 00:32:10,666 or what's happened to his penis? 633 00:32:10,732 --> 00:32:13,535 (LAUGHTER) 634 00:32:13,602 --> 00:32:15,871 Right, then. Let's see what all the fuss is about. 635 00:32:15,937 --> 00:32:17,906 Holy shit! 636 00:32:21,343 --> 00:32:26,282 Oh-h-h-h-h! 637 00:32:29,150 --> 00:32:30,519 Phwoar. 638 00:32:30,586 --> 00:32:32,288 And now straighten those wheels, Richard, 639 00:32:32,321 --> 00:32:33,655 straighten them, 640 00:32:33,722 --> 00:32:35,291 because you've got to go down straight. 641 00:32:35,357 --> 00:32:39,428 Holy shit. Oh-h-h-h-h, shit! 642 00:32:39,495 --> 00:32:41,297 That is frightening. 643 00:32:47,068 --> 00:32:49,104 Love this desert. 644 00:32:49,170 --> 00:32:51,172 I'm never, ever, ever happier 645 00:32:51,307 --> 00:32:53,675 than I am when I'm in a desert. 646 00:32:53,742 --> 00:32:57,879 And this... this is the best desert I've ever been to. 647 00:33:00,516 --> 00:33:02,618 You can never really lose sight of the fact, though, 648 00:33:02,684 --> 00:33:04,320 that what it actually is 649 00:33:04,386 --> 00:33:08,757 is a big, orange killing engine. 650 00:33:08,824 --> 00:33:12,361 Now, a big crest's coming up. No idea. 651 00:33:12,428 --> 00:33:16,031 Gentle rolling hill or massive cliff? 652 00:33:16,097 --> 00:33:17,933 I don't know, Hammond! 653 00:33:17,999 --> 00:33:20,201 Hammond, seriously. 654 00:33:20,336 --> 00:33:22,103 Shit, he's gone. 655 00:33:22,170 --> 00:33:24,640 Hammond's gone, everyone. Hammond's gone. Big one. 656 00:33:26,342 --> 00:33:27,676 (SIGHS) 657 00:33:28,910 --> 00:33:30,346 Oh, (BLEEP) me. 658 00:33:37,085 --> 00:33:40,556 How the (BLEEP) did you get down that? 659 00:33:41,990 --> 00:33:44,360 With my eyes shut! 660 00:33:44,393 --> 00:33:46,762 (LAUGHS) That was terrifying! 661 00:33:46,828 --> 00:33:48,997 (LAUGHS) 662 00:33:49,064 --> 00:33:51,367 Jesus! 663 00:33:59,475 --> 00:34:01,410 JEREMY: As we continued to head east, 664 00:34:01,477 --> 00:34:03,779 the terrain eventually levelled out... 665 00:34:07,949 --> 00:34:12,020 which meant we swapped terror for extreme discomfort. 666 00:34:15,023 --> 00:34:18,059 Ah. Oh, God Almighty. 667 00:34:18,126 --> 00:34:21,062 I don't think these cars were actually designed 668 00:34:21,129 --> 00:34:23,765 to take this much punishment. 669 00:34:23,832 --> 00:34:26,402 - And I know we weren't. - (GROANS) 670 00:34:26,435 --> 00:34:28,103 The only thing is, 671 00:34:28,169 --> 00:34:31,873 James's car rides lower than this and will be worse. 672 00:34:31,940 --> 00:34:34,876 Argh! Ow! 673 00:34:34,943 --> 00:34:36,678 Ow! Ow! Ow! 674 00:34:38,414 --> 00:34:40,582 Agh! 675 00:34:40,649 --> 00:34:42,684 JEREMY: Soon, the relentless battering 676 00:34:42,751 --> 00:34:45,421 started to cause breakdowns. 677 00:34:45,454 --> 00:34:47,022 (ENGINE SPLUTTERS) 678 00:34:47,088 --> 00:34:50,191 Sand... Sand in gear shift. 679 00:34:50,258 --> 00:34:53,128 JEREMY: My throttle is jammed wide open, people. 680 00:34:55,431 --> 00:34:58,500 (ENGINE REVS AND WHINES) 681 00:35:03,705 --> 00:35:06,708 The problem is that every time the air filter, here, 682 00:35:06,775 --> 00:35:09,310 turns as I'm driving along-- which it does-- 683 00:35:09,445 --> 00:35:11,447 it's jamming the throttle. 684 00:35:12,448 --> 00:35:13,649 (SIGHS) 685 00:35:14,750 --> 00:35:16,452 What's going on here? 686 00:35:18,053 --> 00:35:19,354 What's up? 687 00:35:19,455 --> 00:35:21,356 The throttle is now jamming 688 00:35:21,457 --> 00:35:22,958 fully open all the time. 689 00:35:23,024 --> 00:35:24,926 Oh, problem. 690 00:35:40,642 --> 00:35:42,878 (TAPPING AND CLANGING) 691 00:35:42,944 --> 00:35:44,045 Oh, God. 692 00:35:45,481 --> 00:35:49,718 It is still moving. (GROANS) 693 00:35:49,785 --> 00:35:51,820 RICHARD: Many miles ahead, 694 00:35:51,887 --> 00:35:54,923 we'd pulled over for a break from the endless bumps, 695 00:35:54,990 --> 00:35:57,959 and James was being very interesting! 696 00:36:01,329 --> 00:36:04,332 The good thing about this hat is you can angle it, like a heliostat, 697 00:36:04,399 --> 00:36:05,701 to where the sun's coming from. 698 00:36:05,767 --> 00:36:07,302 Yes, that's true. 699 00:36:07,368 --> 00:36:10,005 But you still look a tit. 700 00:36:10,071 --> 00:36:13,174 Luckily for Hammond, who could do with the company, 701 00:36:13,241 --> 00:36:15,911 I was back on the move. 702 00:36:15,977 --> 00:36:20,248 Right, a new style of driving is now required. 703 00:36:20,315 --> 00:36:24,352 This arm for steering, this arm for changing gear, 704 00:36:24,419 --> 00:36:29,290 and then another arm for deaccelerating, like so. 705 00:36:29,357 --> 00:36:31,292 Yes! 706 00:36:31,359 --> 00:36:32,994 Accelerate. 707 00:36:33,061 --> 00:36:34,896 (ENGINE REVS) 708 00:36:34,963 --> 00:36:36,798 Deaccelerate. 709 00:36:36,865 --> 00:36:39,267 Sometimes, if you listen very carefully, 710 00:36:39,334 --> 00:36:41,102 you can hear my genius. 711 00:36:43,404 --> 00:36:45,340 JEREMY: Back as a threesome, we continued 712 00:36:45,406 --> 00:36:49,811 with our seemingly endless journey to the east. 713 00:36:49,878 --> 00:36:53,014 Just need to find a road now. This is not funny any more. 714 00:36:53,081 --> 00:36:55,617 Enough desert. 715 00:36:55,684 --> 00:36:57,719 I don't want another night in the desert. 716 00:36:59,087 --> 00:37:01,890 I smell pretty bad. 717 00:37:01,957 --> 00:37:03,659 And I suspect that if we manage 718 00:37:03,725 --> 00:37:06,595 to find somewhere tonight near civilisation, 719 00:37:06,662 --> 00:37:08,564 we should probably have a ceremonial 720 00:37:08,630 --> 00:37:11,466 bonfire of the underpants. 721 00:37:11,567 --> 00:37:12,934 JAMES: In truth, though, 722 00:37:13,001 --> 00:37:16,037 I thought we'd be in the desert forever. 723 00:37:16,104 --> 00:37:20,241 But then, late in the afternoon... 724 00:37:20,308 --> 00:37:25,847 I'm looking ahead, and I'm not seeing an endless sea of sand. 725 00:37:26,748 --> 00:37:28,684 I'm seeing green. 726 00:37:30,218 --> 00:37:32,988 Trees! Those are trees and shrubs! 727 00:37:37,893 --> 00:37:38,960 Pylons! 728 00:37:39,027 --> 00:37:41,597 Pylons! That means electricity. 729 00:37:45,901 --> 00:37:47,068 Oh, yes! 730 00:37:48,236 --> 00:37:49,771 Civilisation! 731 00:37:51,673 --> 00:37:54,275 JAMES: And then, best of all... 732 00:37:56,044 --> 00:37:57,212 Oh, my God. 733 00:38:05,386 --> 00:38:08,189 I honestly thought we had another night of sleeping... 734 00:38:08,256 --> 00:38:09,825 - (JAMES SIGHS) - ...in the sand. 735 00:38:09,891 --> 00:38:12,227 But, no! Look at it! 736 00:38:14,029 --> 00:38:16,031 Nicest thing I've ever seen. 737 00:38:19,635 --> 00:38:22,070 JEREMY: I could go east, I could go west... 738 00:38:22,137 --> 00:38:24,472 Whichever way you go, it goes somewhere. That's the point. 739 00:38:24,539 --> 00:38:26,307 It's a road, it goes somewhere. 740 00:38:26,374 --> 00:38:29,510 You know what we've just done, don't you? 741 00:38:29,645 --> 00:38:33,014 We've just crossed the Namib Desert in three beach buggies. 742 00:38:33,081 --> 00:38:34,415 - We have. - We did. 743 00:38:34,482 --> 00:38:36,284 We did. 744 00:38:36,351 --> 00:38:39,220 There is literally nothing can stop us now. 745 00:38:43,424 --> 00:38:45,026 JEREMY: Admittedly, 746 00:38:45,093 --> 00:38:48,329 our crossing had not exactly been as the crow flies, 747 00:38:48,396 --> 00:38:50,098 but we had found our road, 748 00:38:50,165 --> 00:38:52,333 and that's all that mattered. 749 00:38:53,434 --> 00:38:54,803 Oh, yes! 750 00:38:54,870 --> 00:38:56,938 That's the best thing I've ever seen! 751 00:38:57,005 --> 00:39:00,676 Yes, it is the road to freedom! 752 00:39:00,742 --> 00:39:03,111 - (HISSING) - What the hell was that? 753 00:39:05,580 --> 00:39:09,584 Something has just exploded at the back of my car. 754 00:39:09,685 --> 00:39:11,887 Oh, dear. 755 00:39:11,953 --> 00:39:14,322 By the time my colleagues had got back to me, 756 00:39:14,389 --> 00:39:17,192 I'd worked out what the problem was. 757 00:39:17,258 --> 00:39:19,427 It's really straightforward, OK? 758 00:39:19,494 --> 00:39:22,931 - The top bolt has come out of the shock absorber. - Right. 759 00:39:22,998 --> 00:39:26,534 It shot up, boinged into the coolant pipe, 760 00:39:26,601 --> 00:39:29,938 and three gallons of water have simply burst out, 761 00:39:30,005 --> 00:39:32,741 going everywhere except into the engine. 762 00:39:32,808 --> 00:39:36,544 - Right. - So all I've got to do is reattach the top bolt... 763 00:39:36,611 --> 00:39:41,116 mend the pipe and find three gallons of water... 764 00:39:41,182 --> 00:39:45,520 which I shall get from a passing motorist, and I'll be on my way. 765 00:39:45,586 --> 00:39:46,621 Right. 766 00:39:46,722 --> 00:39:47,856 All I could do with a hand with 767 00:39:47,923 --> 00:39:49,424 is just lifting the car up 768 00:39:49,490 --> 00:39:51,559 so I can reattach the, um... 769 00:39:51,626 --> 00:39:53,494 Yeah. Well, is there anybody here? 770 00:39:53,561 --> 00:39:56,164 - There's... - I suppose a motorist will pass eventually. 771 00:39:56,231 --> 00:39:58,900 The one that gives you water will also lift it up for you. 772 00:39:58,967 --> 00:40:00,736 You could just lift it up a little bit. 773 00:40:00,736 --> 00:40:02,670 Or we could go and have a beer. 774 00:40:02,670 --> 00:40:02,738 Or we could go and have a beer. - I hear traffic. - Yes. - We'd better not be here. 775 00:40:02,738 --> 00:40:04,605 - I hear traffic. - Yes. - We'd better not be here. 776 00:40:04,672 --> 00:40:06,708 We don't want to interfere when you're trying to talk 777 00:40:06,775 --> 00:40:08,276 'cause we might put them off. 778 00:40:08,343 --> 00:40:13,481 (ENGINES REV) 779 00:40:13,548 --> 00:40:14,883 Right. 780 00:40:25,794 --> 00:40:30,065 Somewhere along here there will be a place, 781 00:40:30,131 --> 00:40:33,234 and that place will have a bar in it 782 00:40:33,301 --> 00:40:34,836 that will contain beer. 783 00:40:39,507 --> 00:40:40,776 Do you have any water? 784 00:40:40,842 --> 00:40:42,210 - Huh? - Water. 785 00:40:42,277 --> 00:40:44,512 Because the radiator has blown, 786 00:40:44,579 --> 00:40:46,181 so I need just three gallons. 787 00:40:46,247 --> 00:40:49,484 Look, you've got some water there. Just a bucket. 788 00:40:53,021 --> 00:40:55,891 It's an actual water lorry... 789 00:40:55,957 --> 00:40:58,760 leaking water, and he won't give me any. 790 00:41:03,231 --> 00:41:05,500 Eventually, I flagged down a local 791 00:41:05,566 --> 00:41:07,803 who had water to spare. 792 00:41:07,803 --> 00:41:09,838 Thank you. 793 00:41:09,905 --> 00:41:12,273 And then I got on with the repairs. 794 00:41:12,340 --> 00:41:16,912 That is one reassembled shock absorber. 795 00:41:16,978 --> 00:41:18,413 That's reattached, 796 00:41:18,479 --> 00:41:21,149 so that's the cooling system back in one piece. 797 00:41:25,386 --> 00:41:29,024 JAMES: After an exhausting five-hour drive, 798 00:41:29,090 --> 00:41:31,592 Richard and I finally reached a town, 799 00:41:31,659 --> 00:41:36,031 which turned out to be Namibia's capital city: Windhoek, 800 00:41:36,097 --> 00:41:39,100 and we too were taking on liquids. 801 00:41:55,750 --> 00:41:56,985 Mm. 802 00:42:03,291 --> 00:42:04,259 (HISSING) 803 00:42:04,325 --> 00:42:06,694 Back out on the highway, though, 804 00:42:06,761 --> 00:42:09,464 things weren't so good. 805 00:42:09,530 --> 00:42:14,069 What I'm driving here - or attempting to drive - is Apollo 13. 806 00:42:14,135 --> 00:42:15,636 There's some air trapped in the system 807 00:42:15,703 --> 00:42:18,874 and I've had to make a small hole in the front 808 00:42:18,940 --> 00:42:20,475 to get at the radiator. 809 00:42:20,541 --> 00:42:21,877 Bled that, 810 00:42:21,877 --> 00:42:23,611 bled all the stuff going into the engine. 811 00:42:23,678 --> 00:42:24,779 This is the header pipe. 812 00:42:24,880 --> 00:42:26,581 Everything is bled, and yet, 813 00:42:26,647 --> 00:42:29,084 you do a mile, it overheats. 814 00:42:29,150 --> 00:42:30,886 Another mile, overheats. 815 00:42:42,330 --> 00:42:46,601 Well, we've covered... 20 miles in four hours. 816 00:42:52,908 --> 00:42:54,142 (SIGHS) 817 00:43:01,516 --> 00:43:06,654 This is the sixth time in 30 miles that's happened. 818 00:43:06,721 --> 00:43:09,657 Whilst my colleagues embraced beer and bed, 819 00:43:09,724 --> 00:43:13,394 I steeled myself for the longest, coldest, 820 00:43:13,461 --> 00:43:17,332 most frustrating night of my life. 821 00:43:17,398 --> 00:43:19,334 (HISSING) 822 00:43:22,938 --> 00:43:24,439 JEREMY: The roads are getting worse. 823 00:43:24,505 --> 00:43:26,942 Honestly, my bones are going to shatter. 824 00:43:26,975 --> 00:43:30,011 - (ENGINE REVS) - Oh, my God! 825 00:43:30,078 --> 00:43:31,379 (SCREAMS) 826 00:43:35,250 --> 00:43:39,054 - I've had a great idea. - Oh, no. 827 00:43:40,055 --> 00:43:42,090 Oh, shit, it's really high!