1 00:00:02,514 --> 00:00:03,998 Go, in the door.. 2 00:00:04,391 --> 00:00:05,568 Push ! 3 00:00:05,705 --> 00:00:06,813 Push ! 4 00:00:06,885 --> 00:00:08,714 No no no! Turn it around. Turn it around, you're breaking. 5 00:00:08,783 --> 00:00:09,653 Shove it, breaking ! 6 00:00:09,857 --> 00:00:12,058 You shove it! Shove it back ! 7 00:00:14,795 --> 00:00:16,263 Here we go. 8 00:00:16,727 --> 00:00:19,098 Don't break the branches, Dwight. 9 00:00:21,361 --> 00:00:22,675 Ah, I got a splinter. 10 00:00:22,781 --> 00:00:24,453 Well, suck it up, we all have problems. 11 00:00:24,521 --> 00:00:26,039 Hey everybody. 12 00:00:26,141 --> 00:00:28,035 Look what we have ! 13 00:00:30,308 --> 00:00:31,553 Nice, huh ? 14 00:00:32,175 --> 00:00:33,659 - I've got it leveraged. Push ! - One three. 15 00:00:33,744 --> 00:00:36,525 - Straight up. - Ready, one, two, three. 16 00:00:40,320 --> 00:00:41,685 Merry Christmas ! 17 00:01:07,465 --> 00:01:09,665 Episode 210- Season 2 CHRISTMAS PARTY 18 00:01:09,915 --> 00:01:12,211 Catch 22 team : El uploador, Keyshawn, Occeane, Unfold Script: Nikki (twiztv.com) 19 00:01:12,327 --> 00:01:14,893 http://pmag.f2o.org/theofficeus/ www.forom.com 20 00:01:19,103 --> 00:01:20,724 Did it work ? 21 00:01:20,997 --> 00:01:22,979 Well, sort of. 22 00:01:24,003 --> 00:01:25,675 Why did you get it so big ? 23 00:01:26,177 --> 00:01:27,883 'A', that's what she said. 24 00:01:27,989 --> 00:01:29,320 And 'B', 25 00:01:29,494 --> 00:01:30,654 I wanted it to be impressive. 26 00:01:30,722 --> 00:01:33,025 he biggest day of the year deserves the biggest tree of the year. 27 00:01:33,698 --> 00:01:35,831 But what are we going to do with this hacked off part ? 28 00:01:35,954 --> 00:01:38,496 Well, that is a perfectly good mini tree Kevin. 29 00:01:39,059 --> 00:01:41,669 And we are going to sell that to charity. 30 00:01:42,137 --> 00:01:43,962 That's what Christmas is all about. 31 00:01:52,456 --> 00:01:54,043 So this year, for the first time ever... 32 00:01:54,135 --> 00:01:56,165 I got Pam in Secret Santa. 33 00:01:56,370 --> 00:01:58,042 And I got her this, teapot. 34 00:01:58,267 --> 00:01:59,888 Which I know she really wants. 35 00:01:59,977 --> 00:02:01,189 So she can make tea at her desk. 36 00:02:01,240 --> 00:02:04,089 but I'm also gonna stuff it with some inside jokes. 37 00:02:04,434 --> 00:02:05,765 Like... 38 00:02:06,212 --> 00:02:07,986 This is my high school yearbook photo. 39 00:02:08,058 --> 00:02:11,112 She saw it at the party, and it really makes her laugh. 40 00:02:11,818 --> 00:02:12,835 I'm not sure why. 41 00:02:13,886 --> 00:02:15,098 What else? 42 00:02:15,801 --> 00:02:17,285 This is hot sauce packet. 43 00:02:17,869 --> 00:02:20,581 She put this on a hot dog a couple of years ago. 44 00:02:20,701 --> 00:02:22,475 Because she thought it was ketchup 45 00:02:23,724 --> 00:02:25,209 And, it was really funny. 46 00:02:25,301 --> 00:02:27,263 So I kept the other two. 47 00:02:27,690 --> 00:02:29,908 This would take a little too long to explain. 48 00:02:30,017 --> 00:02:31,109 So I won't. 49 00:02:31,262 --> 00:02:33,037 And this is a card. 50 00:02:34,231 --> 00:02:37,476 Because Christmas is the time to tell people how you feel. 51 00:02:40,907 --> 00:02:42,443 Is there anything we're missing ? 52 00:02:42,647 --> 00:02:43,910 Phyllis, you got the lights ? 53 00:02:44,016 --> 00:02:45,756 Yes, I got those cute little ones. 54 00:02:47,670 --> 00:02:49,394 Do you think I should have gotten the big ones ? 55 00:02:49,465 --> 00:02:50,523 We'll see. 56 00:02:51,175 --> 00:02:54,246 Angela, drafted me into the party planning committee. 57 00:02:54,335 --> 00:02:58,539 Her memo said that we need to prepare for every possible disaster. 58 00:02:59,908 --> 00:03:03,234 Which to me seems...excessive. 59 00:03:03,767 --> 00:03:06,313 Merry Christmas ! 60 00:03:07,736 --> 00:03:08,435 Pimp ! 61 00:03:09,582 --> 00:03:10,418 I'm kidding. 62 00:03:10,503 --> 00:03:12,653 What do we got ? What do we got ? How many plates are we getting ? 63 00:03:12,725 --> 00:03:13,305 Fifty. 64 00:03:13,356 --> 00:03:14,431 Double it. Double everything. 65 00:03:14,533 --> 00:03:16,598 Double ice cream. Double napkins. Double it. 66 00:03:16,755 --> 00:03:18,086 On me. 67 00:03:18,396 --> 00:03:19,799 It was a tough year 68 00:03:19,850 --> 00:03:21,061 I had to fire somebody this year. 69 00:03:21,181 --> 00:03:23,160 This party has to really rock. 70 00:03:24,119 --> 00:03:25,535 Check it out. 71 00:03:26,204 --> 00:03:27,671 Christmas bonus. Three-thousand G's. 72 00:03:27,726 --> 00:03:29,841 I got this for helping save the company money 73 00:03:31,278 --> 00:03:33,769 So I guess some good came out of firing Devin after all. 74 00:03:34,987 --> 00:03:36,898 Maybe I should call him, tell him that. 75 00:03:37,175 --> 00:03:39,103 I want people to cut loose. 76 00:03:39,123 --> 00:03:41,614 I want people...making out in closets. 77 00:03:43,003 --> 00:03:47,132 I want, I want people hanging from the ceilings, lampshades on the heads 78 00:03:47,190 --> 00:03:49,954 I want it to be a Playboy Mansion party. 79 00:03:50,112 --> 00:03:51,920 And also, I want you to know, 80 00:03:52,125 --> 00:03:54,189 and spread the word, that I will have my digital camera. 81 00:03:54,449 --> 00:03:57,076 And I will be taking pictures all along the way. 82 00:03:57,182 --> 00:03:59,472 And the best and craziest thing that happens, 83 00:03:59,591 --> 00:04:01,468 will be on the cover of the newsletter. 84 00:04:01,506 --> 00:04:02,239 Incentive. 85 00:04:02,260 --> 00:04:04,563 You do realize that we can't serve liquor at the party. 86 00:04:04,618 --> 00:04:06,307 Yeah, I know. Dammit. 87 00:04:06,737 --> 00:04:08,498 Stupid corporate wet blankets. 88 00:04:08,617 --> 00:04:10,306 Like booze ever killed anybody. 89 00:04:11,521 --> 00:04:13,159 One, two, three. 90 00:04:15,179 --> 00:04:16,749 You guys should use a hand truck. 91 00:04:17,722 --> 00:04:19,359 Do we have one ? 92 00:04:19,929 --> 00:04:21,021 No. 93 00:04:23,977 --> 00:04:25,956 Will you help me ? 94 00:04:26,522 --> 00:04:28,263 No. No way. 95 00:04:28,351 --> 00:04:29,318 It- no. 96 00:04:29,426 --> 00:04:31,183 Come on, Mike. Let me borrow the hat. For just a couple of hours. 97 00:04:31,252 --> 00:04:32,668 - You wanna be Santa ? - Yeah. 98 00:04:32,723 --> 00:04:34,292 Have you ever seen Santa ? 99 00:04:34,398 --> 00:04:36,480 Yeah, I've SEEN Santa. Who cares ? 100 00:04:36,603 --> 00:04:38,735 Okay, well, I'm sorry. It just doesn't work. 101 00:04:38,872 --> 00:04:39,954 Michael ! 102 00:04:40,346 --> 00:04:42,035 I would like to be the elf. 103 00:04:42,397 --> 00:04:45,400 That makes sense, because he has elfish features. 104 00:04:47,246 --> 00:04:48,901 Okay, everyone, listen up ! 105 00:04:49,143 --> 00:04:51,293 It is time, to get your presents. 106 00:04:51,638 --> 00:04:54,644 Wrap them, and place them under the tree. 107 00:04:55,671 --> 00:04:57,309 Like so. 108 00:04:57,859 --> 00:05:00,060 If you do not get your present wrapped, 109 00:05:00,131 --> 00:05:02,401 and under the tree within the next five minutes, 110 00:05:03,342 --> 00:05:05,390 you will be disqualified from Secret Santa. 111 00:05:05,905 --> 00:05:07,748 All right ? No exceptions. 112 00:05:07,823 --> 00:05:09,154 Except Michael. 113 00:05:09,388 --> 00:05:10,872 I got Angela. 114 00:05:11,282 --> 00:05:14,199 She's into these posters of babies... 115 00:05:14,766 --> 00:05:16,984 dressed as adults. I got her one of those. 116 00:05:18,420 --> 00:05:21,089 I felt kind of weird buying that. 117 00:05:21,469 --> 00:05:22,619 I got Creed. 118 00:05:22,706 --> 00:05:24,680 And to tell you the truth, I don't know anything about Creed. 119 00:05:24,973 --> 00:05:27,794 know his name's Creed. I know he works right over there. 120 00:05:27,908 --> 00:05:29,818 I think he's Irish and I... 121 00:05:30,512 --> 00:05:33,528 I got him this, uh, shamrock keychain. 122 00:05:34,928 --> 00:05:37,120 I got myself for Secret Santa. 123 00:05:37,966 --> 00:05:40,852 I was suppose to tell somebody, but I didn't. 124 00:05:42,859 --> 00:05:45,398 You get something good this year 125 00:05:45,512 --> 00:05:46,885 I think I did a pretty good job. 126 00:05:47,774 --> 00:05:49,055 Who'd you have ? 127 00:05:49,163 --> 00:05:51,116 I can't tell you, 'cause it's a secret. 128 00:05:51,225 --> 00:05:52,792 think I got something pretty nice for my guy. 129 00:05:52,858 --> 00:05:54,876 - Yeah ? - Spent a lot of dough. A lot of dough. 130 00:05:55,006 --> 00:05:55,917 Wow. 131 00:05:56,058 --> 00:05:57,968 Well, there, there's a $20 limit, right ? So. 132 00:05:58,011 --> 00:05:59,964 Yeah, I wanted this party to be really special. 133 00:06:00,008 --> 00:06:01,586 So I sorta went above and beyond. 134 00:06:01,672 --> 00:06:03,311 hat's great, well, don't tell me who it is, 'cause... 135 00:06:03,365 --> 00:06:05,335 It was Ryan ! Yep. 136 00:06:05,427 --> 00:06:07,706 I have Ryan. 137 00:06:07,776 --> 00:06:09,301 Gather 'round. 138 00:06:09,409 --> 00:06:12,143 Secret Santa, let's go. Let's go. Come on. 139 00:06:12,252 --> 00:06:13,901 Stanley, no. I'm gonna handle the cord. 140 00:06:14,161 --> 00:06:15,507 Kay ? Safety reasons. 141 00:06:15,577 --> 00:06:17,205 I know how to plug something in. 142 00:06:17,248 --> 00:06:18,355 I wanna do it. 143 00:06:18,469 --> 00:06:19,814 All right ! 144 00:06:20,096 --> 00:06:23,047 Let's count it down. Like Rockefeller Center. 145 00:06:23,248 --> 00:06:24,941 Ready ? 146 00:06:24,946 --> 00:06:25,901 Three. 147 00:06:26,031 --> 00:06:27,094 Two. 148 00:06:27,160 --> 00:06:28,179 One. 149 00:06:28,266 --> 00:06:30,089 Yeah ! 150 00:06:31,147 --> 00:06:32,666 Not great. 151 00:06:32,774 --> 00:06:34,386 Sorry, everybody. 152 00:06:35,362 --> 00:06:37,228 I think the tree looks nice. 153 00:06:37,885 --> 00:06:39,968 - I could get some flares from my car. - No, no 154 00:06:40,082 --> 00:06:42,903 Shake it off, everybody. Just, let's do Secret Santa. 155 00:06:43,055 --> 00:06:46,483 Presents are the best way to show someone how much you care. 156 00:06:47,552 --> 00:06:50,509 It is like this tangible thing that you can point to and say: 157 00:06:50,574 --> 00:06:53,785 "Hey, man, I love you this many dollars worth." 158 00:06:54,377 --> 00:06:57,002 First present, Oscar. 159 00:07:00,398 --> 00:07:01,613 A shower radio, neat. 160 00:07:01,727 --> 00:07:03,122 Oh, great. That was from me. 161 00:07:03,208 --> 00:07:05,053 hanks, Kelly. You know, I was gonna get one of these. 162 00:07:05,140 --> 00:07:08,091 Okay, that's enough. Let's keep it moving on. Jim. 163 00:07:08,986 --> 00:07:10,613 Ah, cool. 164 00:07:14,140 --> 00:07:15,507 That's from me. 165 00:07:15,778 --> 00:07:17,058 Great. 166 00:07:17,449 --> 00:07:18,838 Where'd you get it ? 167 00:07:18,952 --> 00:07:21,100 I don't know, it was so long ago. 168 00:07:21,235 --> 00:07:23,492 He obviously forgot to get me something. 169 00:07:23,550 --> 00:07:26,653 And then he went into his closet and dug out this little number. 170 00:07:26,762 --> 00:07:28,238 And then threw it in a bag. 171 00:07:28,351 --> 00:07:30,413 Yep, that's exactly what happened. 172 00:07:30,505 --> 00:07:31,482 Pam. 173 00:07:39,348 --> 00:07:41,409 Oh, my God ! 174 00:07:42,391 --> 00:07:45,603 Thank you very much, Santa. Whoever you are. 175 00:07:46,086 --> 00:07:48,321 - It's awesome. - There's a little more to it. 176 00:07:48,418 --> 00:07:50,436 All right, next. Ryan. 177 00:07:50,594 --> 00:07:52,785 Don't ! 178 00:07:57,093 --> 00:07:58,590 A video iPod. 179 00:08:01,389 --> 00:08:04,232 omebody really got carried away with the spirit of Christmas. 180 00:08:04,959 --> 00:08:07,303 It was me. I got carried away with the spirit. 181 00:08:07,389 --> 00:08:09,429 Wasn't there a $20 limit on the gift? 182 00:08:10,520 --> 00:08:12,299 This is 400 bucks. 183 00:08:12,673 --> 00:08:15,218 - You don't know that. - Yeah, you left the price tag on. 184 00:08:15,326 --> 00:08:17,778 I did, what ? Oh, shoot. Wow, 185 00:08:17,936 --> 00:08:20,865 Well, who cares? It doesn't matter what I spent. 186 00:08:20,957 --> 00:08:23,756 What matters is that Christmas is fun, right ? 187 00:08:25,449 --> 00:08:27,207 Michael. 188 00:08:27,429 --> 00:08:28,997 For me ? 189 00:08:29,344 --> 00:08:32,773 What is in here ? 190 00:08:34,867 --> 00:08:37,145 - Come on. - I-I knitted it for you. 191 00:08:37,997 --> 00:08:39,993 An oven mitt ? 192 00:08:40,286 --> 00:08:41,740 Okay. 193 00:08:43,302 --> 00:08:44,691 So Phyllis is basically saying : 194 00:08:44,778 --> 00:08:47,035 "Hey Michael, I know you did a lot to help the office this year." 195 00:08:47,192 --> 00:08:50,360 "But I only care about you... a homemade oven mitt's worth." 196 00:08:51,006 --> 00:08:53,197 I gave Ryan an iPod. 197 00:08:56,235 --> 00:08:59,675 Should we just keep opening up the presents ? 198 00:08:59,789 --> 00:09:02,675 We don't do anything until Michael gives us further instructions. 199 00:09:07,568 --> 00:09:08,545 I got it ! 200 00:09:08,593 --> 00:09:13,975 We are going to turn Secret Santa into Yankee Swap ! 201 00:09:14,349 --> 00:09:15,825 What is, Yankee Swap ? 202 00:09:15,874 --> 00:09:18,022 One person chooses a gift. 203 00:09:18,315 --> 00:09:20,810 The next person can either choose a gift. 204 00:09:20,875 --> 00:09:23,306 Or steal that person's gift. 205 00:09:23,610 --> 00:09:27,082 If your gift gets stolen, then you can steal someone else's gift 206 00:09:27,347 --> 00:09:28,541 Or choose a new gift. 207 00:09:28,763 --> 00:09:30,651 I thought that was called nasty Christmas. 208 00:09:30,765 --> 00:09:32,522 Yeah, we call it White Elephant. 209 00:09:32,588 --> 00:09:34,020 Well, I call it fun ! 210 00:09:34,199 --> 00:09:35,284 Why are we doing this ? 211 00:09:35,349 --> 00:09:37,324 Because it's better. Because it's more special. 212 00:09:37,438 --> 00:09:38,848 - I sounds mean. - Shut... 213 00:09:38,957 --> 00:09:41,626 No, it's not. Okay, just give it a shot. 214 00:09:42,027 --> 00:09:44,458 Michael should have asked the party planning committee first. 215 00:09:45,065 --> 00:09:47,789 He's not supposed to just spring things on us out of nowhere. 216 00:09:53,762 --> 00:09:56,279 Okay, Meredith is up first. 217 00:09:56,479 --> 00:09:59,083 Here's the deal. You can either pick a new gift, 218 00:09:59,219 --> 00:10:02,561 OR, you can steal somebody else's gift they've already gotten. 219 00:10:02,718 --> 00:10:04,389 Like the oven mitt. 220 00:10:04,503 --> 00:10:05,718 I'll take the teapot. 221 00:10:05,789 --> 00:10:07,742 Oh, shouldn't we... 222 00:10:08,593 --> 00:10:10,096 I bought that specifically for Pam. 223 00:10:10,183 --> 00:10:12,266 Yaaankee Swap. That's what makes it fun. 224 00:10:12,657 --> 00:10:15,396 - Pam, you can steal the oven mitt now. - I'll take the iPod. 225 00:10:15,809 --> 00:10:17,913 And I have to give it to her ? I don't have a choice ? 226 00:10:17,989 --> 00:10:20,181 Yes, now you can steal the oven mitt, 227 00:10:20,230 --> 00:10:23,355 the old shirt, the shower radio or pick a new gift. 228 00:10:35,241 --> 00:10:37,584 - That was meant for Kelly. - Yeah, I figured. 229 00:10:43,161 --> 00:10:46,156 I think this is going great. 230 00:10:55,248 --> 00:10:58,807 - Yikes. - Well, it's for Angela, so... 231 00:11:01,964 --> 00:11:04,243 That's like the creepiest thing that I've ever seen. 232 00:11:04,291 --> 00:11:06,396 Angela, you're up. 233 00:11:09,228 --> 00:11:10,769 I'll take the poster. 234 00:11:13,552 --> 00:11:15,505 Some people like these. 235 00:11:15,684 --> 00:11:18,049 I will steal the iPod. 236 00:11:18,619 --> 00:11:21,548 Everyone wants the iPod. It's a huge hit. 237 00:11:21,809 --> 00:11:24,261 It is almost a Christmas miracle. 238 00:11:24,309 --> 00:11:27,781 Ah, well, Oscar, you little gourmand. 239 00:11:28,069 --> 00:11:29,284 You have the next turn. 240 00:11:29,420 --> 00:11:32,832 I'll take the teapot. 241 00:11:33,049 --> 00:11:33,960 Dammit. 242 00:11:34,122 --> 00:11:36,586 Okay, moving along, Meredith, let's go. 243 00:11:36,830 --> 00:11:39,499 I really want the iPod. 244 00:11:39,635 --> 00:11:41,870 It's already been stolen this round. Pick something else. 245 00:11:41,962 --> 00:11:45,434 I hope nobody takes this baby, 'cause this is great. 246 00:11:45,592 --> 00:11:48,261 Wow, look at that fine craftsmanship. 247 00:11:49,205 --> 00:11:52,004 Somebody really put a lot of work into that. It's beautiful. 248 00:11:52,720 --> 00:11:55,064 I'll take the oven mitt. 249 00:11:58,807 --> 00:12:01,107 See, I wanted somebody to take it. Boom. 250 00:12:01,394 --> 00:12:02,414 Reverse psychology. 251 00:12:02,550 --> 00:12:05,458 Reverse psychology is an awesome tool. 252 00:12:05,550 --> 00:12:06,657 I don't know if you guys know about it. 253 00:12:06,700 --> 00:12:12,255 But, basically you make someone think the opposite of what you believe. 254 00:12:12,440 --> 00:12:15,912 And that tricks them into doing something stupid. 255 00:12:16,177 --> 00:12:19,020 Works like a charm. 256 00:12:24,418 --> 00:12:27,109 In addition to these paint ball pellets your gift includes, 257 00:12:27,223 --> 00:12:29,593 two paintball lessons with Dwight Schrute. 258 00:12:29,637 --> 00:12:31,959 You and me, Michael. Yes ! 259 00:12:35,941 --> 00:12:38,133 Who wants to take paintball lessons ? 260 00:12:38,219 --> 00:12:40,194 How is that better than an iPod ? 261 00:12:40,411 --> 00:12:42,793 I never said it was better than an iPod. 262 00:12:45,657 --> 00:12:48,543 Michael keeps bragging about his iPod. But, you know what ? 263 00:12:48,934 --> 00:12:51,001 Two paintball lessons with someone as experienced 264 00:12:51,109 --> 00:12:53,778 as I am is worth easily like two grand. 265 00:12:53,897 --> 00:12:56,154 Take that Saddam. 266 00:12:56,252 --> 00:12:57,988 Last gift, Kevin. 267 00:12:58,096 --> 00:13:00,288 I want the footbath. 268 00:13:02,832 --> 00:13:04,764 That's the thing I bought myself. 269 00:13:04,937 --> 00:13:07,975 I'm really psyched to use it. 270 00:13:09,608 --> 00:13:12,538 Maybe I should have taken the iPod. 271 00:13:14,751 --> 00:13:16,378 Shoot. 272 00:13:16,471 --> 00:13:18,988 Pam, steal something or pick the final gift. 273 00:13:19,292 --> 00:13:21,158 I want the iPod. 274 00:13:21,250 --> 00:13:23,941 - Dammit. - Sure you don't want the teapot ? 275 00:13:24,055 --> 00:13:26,398 I mean, it's an iPod. 276 00:13:26,550 --> 00:13:27,483 - Right. - Sorry. 277 00:13:27,548 --> 00:13:29,312 No, no, definitely. 278 00:13:29,442 --> 00:13:33,955 Okay, well, I guess I will take, that book of short stories. 279 00:13:34,400 --> 00:13:37,633 Yes! There you go. I want the teapot. 280 00:13:37,720 --> 00:13:39,673 Gracias. 281 00:13:39,787 --> 00:13:41,198 You gotta be kidding me. 282 00:13:41,306 --> 00:13:45,624 Yankee Swap is like Machiavelli meets.. 283 00:13:48,022 --> 00:13:49,498 Christmas. 284 00:13:49,552 --> 00:13:52,492 What is she so upset about ? 285 00:13:52,557 --> 00:13:54,359 Maybe because you hated her present so much. 286 00:13:54,445 --> 00:13:56,594 I think Yankee Swap was a big hit. 287 00:13:56,746 --> 00:13:58,308 I think it was a success. 288 00:13:58,357 --> 00:14:00,722 And I'm the one who ended up with Dwight's stupid paint ball pellets. 289 00:14:00,809 --> 00:14:04,259 Yeah, but Michael, the point is that we all bought gifts for specific people. 290 00:14:04,438 --> 00:14:07,178 And you should have just bought a $20 gift like everyone else. 291 00:14:07,243 --> 00:14:10,758 Well, I didn't! I got a big bonus because I fired Devin, 292 00:14:10,850 --> 00:14:13,671 And I used the money to buy something awesome. Sue me ! 293 00:14:15,765 --> 00:14:17,567 You got a bonus check ? 294 00:14:17,718 --> 00:14:19,064 How much ? 295 00:14:19,357 --> 00:14:23,784 It wasn't...It wasn't that much. It was 3,000. 296 00:14:23,897 --> 00:14:26,350 All right, I'm done now. 297 00:14:29,523 --> 00:14:33,326 Unbelievable. I do the nicest thing that anyone's ever done for these people. 298 00:14:33,369 --> 00:14:34,259 And they freak out. 299 00:14:34,330 --> 00:14:37,954 Well, happy birthday, Jesus. Sorry your party's so lame. 300 00:14:41,350 --> 00:14:43,216 That comes to 166.41. 301 00:14:43,395 --> 00:14:44,784 All right, now you're the expert. 302 00:14:44,870 --> 00:14:47,670 Is this enough to get 20 people plastered ? 303 00:14:48,760 --> 00:14:51,022 Fifteen bottles of vodka? 304 00:14:51,397 --> 00:14:55,064 -Yeah, that should do it. - Cool, cool. Box it up. 305 00:14:56,912 --> 00:15:01,578 We wish you a Merry Christmas We wish you a Merry Christmas 306 00:15:01,822 --> 00:15:05,055 We wish you a Merry Christmas And a Happy New Year 307 00:15:05,364 --> 00:15:08,120 I bought this teapot for Pam, and I know she really wants it. 308 00:15:08,196 --> 00:15:10,041 - So can I trade you for it ? - No trades. 309 00:15:10,155 --> 00:15:12,932 Come on. It's a shamrock keychain. Good luck. 310 00:15:13,345 --> 00:15:15,232 A real man makes his own luck. 311 00:15:15,384 --> 00:15:16,968 Billy Zane, "Titanic". 312 00:15:16,974 --> 00:15:18,732 Look, it has sentimental value, Dwight. 313 00:15:19,062 --> 00:15:22,339 Can I buy it from you ? - No, I want it. I'm going to use it. 314 00:15:22,403 --> 00:15:24,043 - You don't even drink tea. - True. 315 00:15:24,151 --> 00:15:25,627 But I get sinus infections. 316 00:15:25,757 --> 00:15:29,446 And sinus infections can be cured by making a tea, from green tea leaf stems. 317 00:15:29,516 --> 00:15:33,574 And pouring it directly into your nose like so. 318 00:15:35,576 --> 00:15:39,211 To think that my gift to Pam will be used for that... 319 00:15:40,014 --> 00:15:42,249 It's a little too much to handle. 320 00:15:42,493 --> 00:15:44,034 - This is awesome. - I know, 321 00:15:44,196 --> 00:15:46,279 It's totally going to change the way I workout. 322 00:15:46,410 --> 00:15:48,753 Yeah, and I was going to get you one of these for Christmas. 323 00:15:48,802 --> 00:15:51,037 Now I don't have to. I'm gonna save a ton of money. 324 00:15:51,129 --> 00:15:52,323 So what are you going to get me instead ? 325 00:15:52,431 --> 00:15:55,838 I don't know. Probably like a sweater or something. 326 00:15:59,413 --> 00:16:02,647 Looks like Santa was a little naughty. 327 00:16:04,345 --> 00:16:05,581 What is that ? 328 00:16:05,690 --> 00:16:09,618 This is Christmas spirit. As in spirits. Booze. 329 00:16:10,106 --> 00:16:11,473 We can drink ? 330 00:16:11,516 --> 00:16:13,513 We're really not supposed to serve alcohol. 331 00:16:13,648 --> 00:16:16,795 Zip it! Toby. Just, I mean, it's a party, come on. 332 00:16:17,126 --> 00:16:20,593 If I can't throw a good party for my employees, then I am a terrible boss. 333 00:16:22,594 --> 00:16:24,092 - Who wants a drink ? - Me, please. 334 00:16:24,222 --> 00:16:26,376 Here we go ! 335 00:16:26,983 --> 00:16:29,028 The deal is that this is my last hurrah. 336 00:16:29,180 --> 00:16:32,978 Cause I made a New Year's resolution that I'm not going to drink anymore. 337 00:16:33,770 --> 00:16:35,007 During the week. 338 00:16:35,489 --> 00:16:36,813 - Hi, guys. - Hey. 339 00:16:36,992 --> 00:16:39,618 Does everyone know my boyfriend, Bob Vance ? 340 00:16:39,705 --> 00:16:42,851 - Kevin Malone. - Bob Vance, Vance refrigeration. 341 00:16:42,878 --> 00:16:45,656 - Stanley Hudson. - Bob Vance, Vance refrigeration. 342 00:16:45,770 --> 00:16:48,612 - Ryan Howard. - Bob Vance, Vance refrigeration. 343 00:16:50,310 --> 00:16:52,052 What line of work you in, Bob ? 344 00:16:52,768 --> 00:16:55,611 I got, I lost Culpepper at TO, it was over, man. 345 00:16:56,093 --> 00:17:00,499 Oh yeah, I need McNabb and Deon Branch to have big games or else I'm done. 346 00:17:00,574 --> 00:17:03,764 It's possible. I can't believe you traded Sean Alexander, man. 347 00:17:03,835 --> 00:17:06,417 - I had to I need a defense. - Come on! Sean Alexander ? 348 00:17:06,531 --> 00:17:08,701 - He's the best back in the league ! - Defense. 349 00:17:08,880 --> 00:17:11,527 - Oh, no, it's-that's not worth it. - It is worth it. 350 00:17:11,658 --> 00:17:13,546 - Never. - Are you kidding ? You wait. 351 00:17:13,855 --> 00:17:18,086 Anybody making out in here ? Not yet, give it time 352 00:17:18,336 --> 00:17:20,354 Oh hey, Ebenezer. Boink. 353 00:17:20,576 --> 00:17:22,638 Okay, how's it going in here ? 354 00:17:22,703 --> 00:17:24,808 We're running low on cups. Do you want me to just run out and 355 00:17:24,835 --> 00:17:25,920 - Yeah, there should be some - No, no, no. 356 00:17:26,007 --> 00:17:27,678 We'll find some, don't leave the party. 357 00:17:27,748 --> 00:17:29,961 One, two, three ! 358 00:17:34,529 --> 00:17:37,437 Kudos to Ryan, king of the party committee ! 359 00:17:37,551 --> 00:17:40,307 Oh, no, I REALLY did not do anything. 360 00:17:40,399 --> 00:17:42,634 No false modesty, my friend. 361 00:17:46,833 --> 00:17:49,003 You know, you don't have to answer calls during a party. 362 00:17:49,725 --> 00:17:51,374 - Just thought you should know. - No. 363 00:17:51,439 --> 00:17:53,869 I was just, checking out my present. 364 00:17:57,591 --> 00:17:59,197 I traded with Dwight. 365 00:17:59,614 --> 00:18:04,112 I figured, you know, you went to a lot of trouble and that means a lot. 366 00:18:06,027 --> 00:18:09,244 And also Roy got me an iPod or, 367 00:18:10,003 --> 00:18:12,824 was going to get me an iPod, so... 368 00:18:13,616 --> 00:18:18,748 Well, either way. This is an amazing gift because it comes with bonus gifts. 369 00:18:19,882 --> 00:18:21,753 Look inside. 370 00:18:26,310 --> 00:18:28,654 Oh my God ! 371 00:18:28,985 --> 00:18:30,873 The yearbook picture ! 372 00:18:31,003 --> 00:18:33,564 Yeah, I think I made the right choice. 373 00:18:34,198 --> 00:18:36,070 Oh, my God. 374 00:18:36,097 --> 00:18:38,055 This is incredible. 375 00:18:38,121 --> 00:18:39,249 Is this the Boggle timer ? 376 00:18:39,314 --> 00:18:42,167 I didn't think you were going to get that one. I really didn't know. 377 00:18:43,198 --> 00:18:45,542 This is so awesome. 378 00:18:45,688 --> 00:18:48,683 Not bad- and if it couldn't go to Ryan, you are the guy I'd want it to go to. 379 00:18:49,209 --> 00:18:50,424 - Thank you. - You're welcome. 380 00:18:50,511 --> 00:18:51,905 Merry Christmas asswipe. 381 00:18:51,949 --> 00:18:55,008 No way! Oh, you're kidding me. Packer ! 382 00:18:56,701 --> 00:18:59,848 Yes! Todd Packer, ladies and gentlemen ! 383 00:19:00,222 --> 00:19:02,023 What's up, my nerds ? 384 00:19:02,137 --> 00:19:03,981 - Check it out. - Oh no, no. 385 00:19:04,003 --> 00:19:05,348 Oh, look at that ! 386 00:19:05,457 --> 00:19:07,258 Icing on the cake ! 387 00:19:07,334 --> 00:19:09,591 Pac man need a drinky. 388 00:19:09,726 --> 00:19:11,961 Let's fix you up. Who wants to fix up- Toby? 389 00:19:12,026 --> 00:19:13,602 Toby's gonna fix you up. 390 00:19:13,659 --> 00:19:15,374 - Whoo! - Yeah. 391 00:19:19,811 --> 00:19:21,092 Darryl ! 392 00:19:21,222 --> 00:19:23,196 Here you go. You earned it. 393 00:19:23,267 --> 00:19:24,840 - That's okay Mike. - No no no no no 394 00:19:24,916 --> 00:19:26,983 I really want you to have it. 395 00:19:27,265 --> 00:19:29,137 All right, thanks, man. 396 00:19:29,245 --> 00:19:31,507 Hey, Merry Christmas. 397 00:19:33,178 --> 00:19:35,001 Whose butt is that ? 398 00:19:35,354 --> 00:19:36,243 Mine. 399 00:19:36,813 --> 00:19:38,614 How did I not guess that ? 400 00:19:38,766 --> 00:19:40,502 Lampshade on the head ! 401 00:19:40,784 --> 00:19:43,128 It's happening ! 402 00:19:43,442 --> 00:19:44,918 Ho, no ! 403 00:19:53,088 --> 00:19:54,542 Hey. 404 00:19:54,721 --> 00:19:56,739 Hello there. 405 00:19:58,003 --> 00:20:00,867 - What are you doing ? - I don't know. 406 00:20:01,502 --> 00:20:04,583 You shouldn't do things like that. The man is supposed to do that. 407 00:20:18,162 --> 00:20:19,790 Thanks for the party Michael. 408 00:20:19,920 --> 00:20:22,025 Listen up, we're going to Poor Richard's. 409 00:20:22,394 --> 00:20:23,565 - Who's in? - I'm in. 410 00:20:23,674 --> 00:20:25,193 - Yes ! - Michael ? 411 00:20:26,348 --> 00:20:28,019 Poor Richard's ? 412 00:20:28,350 --> 00:20:29,717 Yeah, that sounds good. 413 00:20:29,853 --> 00:20:32,001 Christmas is awesome. 414 00:20:32,110 --> 00:20:33,591 First of all... 415 00:20:33,743 --> 00:20:35,891 You get to spend time with people you love. 416 00:20:36,026 --> 00:20:37,177 Secondly... 417 00:20:37,263 --> 00:20:39,482 You can get drunk and no one can say anything. 418 00:20:39,699 --> 00:20:43,258 Third, you give presents. What's better than giving presents? 419 00:20:43,762 --> 00:20:45,347 And fourth, getting presents. 420 00:20:45,374 --> 00:20:47,587 So four things. Not bad for one day. 421 00:20:47,744 --> 00:20:50,630 It's really the greatest day of all time. 422 00:20:53,370 --> 00:20:55,996 Hey Meredith, heading over to Poor Richard's ? 423 00:20:56,115 --> 00:20:56,961 Yep. 424 00:20:57,010 --> 00:20:58,464 Cool, cool, cool. 425 00:20:58,594 --> 00:21:00,743 You need a ride ? 426 00:21:10,041 --> 00:21:12,086 All right, let's head out. 427 00:21:12,656 --> 00:21:15,130 Sounds good, do you have a coat ? 428 00:21:15,361 --> 00:21:17,705 - Yeah. - Oooh-kay.