1 00:00:00,873 --> 00:00:03,672 - Look at that, heh, nice. 2 00:00:03,873 --> 00:00:05,672 - I love cycling. 3 00:00:05,930 --> 00:00:07,372 Andy, I feel like a tourist in my own city. 4 00:00:07,760 --> 00:00:08,842 I literally can't wait to wake up every morning. 5 00:00:08,940 --> 00:00:11,672 - Ok. - She is a beauty. 6 00:00:11,690 --> 00:00:13,672 - Can't beat a horse. A horse is a bike that pedals itself. 7 00:00:14,407 --> 00:00:16,008 - Oh, look at that, smooth roll. -Yeah 8 00:00:16,046 --> 00:00:19,176 - You got it! Lance Armstrong's bike. 9 00:00:19,244 --> 00:00:20,945 - Yes! - His ass was on that seat? 10 00:00:21,012 --> 00:00:22,446 - All right! - Nice. 11 00:00:22,514 --> 00:00:24,173 - No, Mary, that's not his actual bicycle. 12 00:00:24,241 --> 00:00:27,156 But it is the same exact model he uses. 13 00:00:27,224 --> 00:00:29,091 - I'm on Sheryl Crow's side in that whole thing, 14 00:00:29,159 --> 00:00:30,857 So I feel really weird right now. 15 00:00:30,924 --> 00:00:33,020 - Michael! - Oh. 16 00:00:33,085 --> 00:00:35,682 Yes, I can ride a bike. 17 00:00:35,750 --> 00:00:38,380 I take spinning classes three times a month. 18 00:00:38,448 --> 00:00:40,312 I think I know how to ride a bike. 19 00:00:40,380 --> 00:00:42,180 - Are you sure you once knew how to do this? 20 00:00:42,248 --> 00:00:43,249 - I did, yes! 21 00:00:43,317 --> 00:00:45,416 I had those extra wheels on the back 22 00:00:45,484 --> 00:00:46,983 That support you. 23 00:00:47,051 --> 00:00:48,916 Mi-chael! Mi-chael! 24 00:00:48,984 --> 00:00:51,250 Mi-chael! Mi-chael! 25 00:00:51,318 --> 00:00:53,586 Mi-chael! Mi-chael! - Michael! Yeah! 26 00:00:53,654 --> 00:00:55,757 - Yeah! - Just steer more now. 27 00:00:55,825 --> 00:00:58,256 - Oh, my-- - not the car! 28 00:00:58,324 --> 00:01:00,091 - Ow! 29 00:01:03,330 --> 00:01:05,031 You never forget. 30 00:01:05,099 --> 00:01:07,100 Whoo! 31 00:01:10,138 --> 00:01:18,178 ♪ ♪ 32 00:01:20,140 --> 00:01:24,340 Sync & Corrections by Alex1969 www.addic7ed.com 33 00:01:29,818 --> 00:01:30,951 How do I look? 34 00:01:31,019 --> 00:01:33,620 - Amazing. How do I look? 35 00:01:33,688 --> 00:01:35,785 - Normal. Ugly. 36 00:01:35,853 --> 00:01:37,386 - Well, I do the best with what I've got. 37 00:01:37,454 --> 00:01:40,254 Let's go. - All right. 38 00:01:40,322 --> 00:01:42,023 - Wait, wait, wait, wait for me. 39 00:01:42,091 --> 00:01:44,224 It's weird if I come in slightly after. 40 00:01:44,292 --> 00:01:45,992 We have a big meeting with the chief buyer 41 00:01:46,059 --> 00:01:47,759 For frames select, Steve Nash. 42 00:01:47,827 --> 00:01:50,027 - He's not the Steve Nash. 43 00:01:50,095 --> 00:01:51,295 He's big, though. He's kind of like... 44 00:01:51,362 --> 00:01:52,462 Scranton Steve Nash. 45 00:01:52,530 --> 00:01:53,530 - Will you stop trying to put it in terms 46 00:01:53,597 --> 00:01:54,830 You think they'll understand? 47 00:01:54,898 --> 00:01:56,098 It's condescending. - I'm not doing that. 48 00:01:56,165 --> 00:01:57,666 I'm just explaining. 49 00:01:57,733 --> 00:02:00,167 - And who is this "the" Steve Nash? 50 00:02:00,235 --> 00:02:02,102 - Phoenix sun's point guard? 51 00:02:02,169 --> 00:02:03,803 - No. - No? Nothin'? 52 00:02:03,871 --> 00:02:05,604 - No, Mr. Jock Hipster. 53 00:02:05,671 --> 00:02:07,104 - Well, I'm neither of those things, so... 54 00:02:09,874 --> 00:02:10,807 - Whoa. 55 00:02:10,875 --> 00:02:13,143 Libby Dirketts got married. 56 00:02:13,211 --> 00:02:16,479 Big, red mazel tov to the Libster. 57 00:02:16,547 --> 00:02:18,781 Ooh. Says here Dan Becker 58 00:02:18,849 --> 00:02:20,648 Fell off the side of Kilimanjaro 59 00:02:20,716 --> 00:02:22,049 In a climbing accident. 60 00:02:22,117 --> 00:02:24,619 It appears Dan's sherpa survived to tell the tale-- 61 00:02:24,686 --> 00:02:27,253 Oh, my god! - What? Is Dan okay? 62 00:02:27,320 --> 00:02:28,720 - No, he died. 63 00:02:28,788 --> 00:02:30,121 It's Broccoli Rob. 64 00:02:30,188 --> 00:02:31,422 You know this guy. 65 00:02:31,489 --> 00:02:33,223 I showed you his picture on facebook. 66 00:02:33,290 --> 00:02:34,424 - Yes. 67 00:02:34,491 --> 00:02:36,125 - "some Vermont-based alums 68 00:02:36,192 --> 00:02:38,794 "can hear 'Broccoli' Rob Blatt, '96, 69 00:02:38,861 --> 00:02:41,663 "in the state milk lobby's new milk awareness song, 70 00:02:41,731 --> 00:02:44,899 "calci-yum, featuring Phish's Trey anastasio. 71 00:02:44,967 --> 00:02:47,468 "says Broccoli, 'Trey and I had a ton of fun in the studio, 72 00:02:47,536 --> 00:02:49,003 And I think you can hear it in the song'". 73 00:02:49,071 --> 00:02:51,572 - Oh, that's great news for your friend. 74 00:02:51,639 --> 00:02:53,340 - Yeah. Yeah. It's great. 75 00:02:53,408 --> 00:02:54,508 - You know, I forget about milk. 76 00:02:54,575 --> 00:02:56,575 This is a terrific reminder. 77 00:02:59,877 --> 00:03:03,041 - I was the artsy musical one. 78 00:03:03,109 --> 00:03:04,809 And here comes trouble. I had four solos. 79 00:03:04,877 --> 00:03:06,477 Broccoli Rob had three. 80 00:03:06,545 --> 00:03:08,245 Right? 81 00:03:08,313 --> 00:03:10,446 Uhh. 82 00:03:12,349 --> 00:03:13,816 - Go tell her we're here. 83 00:03:13,884 --> 00:03:14,817 You're good with receptionists. 84 00:03:14,884 --> 00:03:15,951 - Oh, ha ha. 85 00:03:17,753 --> 00:03:19,153 Dwight... 86 00:03:24,191 --> 00:03:26,692 - Crap. 87 00:03:26,760 --> 00:03:28,293 Danny Cordray is the worst. 88 00:03:28,361 --> 00:03:29,827 - Well, by worst, you mean the best. 89 00:03:29,895 --> 00:03:31,529 - The best salesman ever. 90 00:03:31,596 --> 00:03:33,296 He works for Osprey paper over in Throop, 91 00:03:33,364 --> 00:03:35,631 Steals more clients from dunder-mifflin than anyone. 92 00:03:35,699 --> 00:03:37,132 - So the situation is the worst. 93 00:03:37,200 --> 00:03:38,433 - Also, he slept with pam. 94 00:03:38,501 --> 00:03:40,535 - No, he didn't. 95 00:03:43,371 --> 00:03:44,338 - Tell 'em. 96 00:03:44,405 --> 00:03:46,139 - Nothing happened. 97 00:03:46,207 --> 00:03:47,840 We went on a couple of dates. 98 00:03:47,908 --> 00:03:49,275 He never called me again. 99 00:03:49,342 --> 00:03:50,842 - What? He never called you? 100 00:03:50,910 --> 00:03:51,877 I thought you said it just fizzled. 101 00:03:51,944 --> 00:03:53,044 - That's fizzling. 102 00:03:53,112 --> 00:03:54,845 I mean, someone has to start the fizzle. 103 00:03:54,913 --> 00:03:55,846 - Yeah, I thought you started it. 104 00:03:55,914 --> 00:03:57,748 - No, I liked him. 105 00:03:57,815 --> 00:03:59,849 For a couple of days. 106 00:03:59,917 --> 00:04:01,517 Four years ago. 107 00:04:03,253 --> 00:04:05,153 You know I have a kid with you, right? 108 00:04:05,221 --> 00:04:06,354 - Ah. 109 00:04:09,290 --> 00:04:10,557 - I'm gonna intimidate him. 110 00:04:10,625 --> 00:04:11,791 Okay? - Okay, great. 111 00:04:11,859 --> 00:04:13,793 I'm just gonna watch. - Watch this. 112 00:04:13,861 --> 00:04:15,961 So anyway, she says, "that is the biggest penis 113 00:04:16,029 --> 00:04:17,996 I have ever seen." and I said, "I know. 114 00:04:18,064 --> 00:04:20,298 "that's why I brought you to the penis museum, 115 00:04:20,365 --> 00:04:22,332 Where tickets are $1,000." 116 00:04:22,400 --> 00:04:23,734 Well, hello, Danny. 117 00:04:23,801 --> 00:04:25,869 - Hey, Dwight. Good to see you. 118 00:04:25,937 --> 00:04:27,203 Jim, hey. - How are you? 119 00:04:27,271 --> 00:04:29,471 Good to see you too. - What are you doing? 120 00:04:29,539 --> 00:04:30,973 - Oh, I'm just here for the coffee. 121 00:04:31,040 --> 00:04:33,208 - Oh, like hell you are. - Dwight! 122 00:04:33,276 --> 00:04:35,309 - He's not just here for the coffee, Jim. 123 00:04:35,377 --> 00:04:36,877 Wake up. 124 00:04:36,945 --> 00:04:38,879 - Brainstorming session is now open. 125 00:04:38,946 --> 00:04:41,047 Anyone has an idea. 126 00:04:41,115 --> 00:04:42,381 hold...On. 127 00:04:42,449 --> 00:04:43,849 Sorry, sorry, sorry. 128 00:04:43,917 --> 00:04:44,917 Hello? 129 00:04:44,984 --> 00:04:46,351 - Hey, it's Jim. 130 00:04:46,419 --> 00:04:48,052 Listen, this is important. Are you busy? 131 00:04:48,120 --> 00:04:49,153 - Oh, hey. No, I'm not busy. 132 00:04:49,221 --> 00:04:50,421 What's up? - You are busy! 133 00:04:50,489 --> 00:04:51,522 We're in a meeting! 134 00:04:51,590 --> 00:04:53,757 - It's Jim, okay? Yes. 135 00:04:53,824 --> 00:04:54,991 - Listen, you gotta get over here, 136 00:04:55,058 --> 00:04:56,292 'cause we're pitching Steve Nash 137 00:04:56,326 --> 00:04:57,493 And Danny Cordray's here. 138 00:04:57,561 --> 00:04:59,494 - You need the big guns, yes? 139 00:04:59,562 --> 00:05:00,662 - Yes. - What'd he say? 140 00:05:00,730 --> 00:05:02,863 What did he say? - The big gun thing. Stop. 141 00:05:02,931 --> 00:05:05,298 - I will see you in ten. Bye! Hold tight. 142 00:05:07,668 --> 00:05:10,102 Well, I know a lot of you thought that my sales days 143 00:05:10,169 --> 00:05:11,369 Were behind me. 144 00:05:11,437 --> 00:05:12,937 And, to be honest, so did I. 145 00:05:13,004 --> 00:05:15,539 And the only reason I got out of the sales game 146 00:05:15,606 --> 00:05:17,307 Was to be reluctantly called back in. 147 00:05:17,374 --> 00:05:18,908 - You don't look reluctant, Michael. 148 00:05:18,976 --> 00:05:20,109 You look really eager. 149 00:05:20,177 --> 00:05:22,777 - no, I don't have time for this. 150 00:05:22,845 --> 00:05:24,279 Are you kidding me? - You don't? 151 00:05:24,347 --> 00:05:26,247 - No! Okay. All right! 152 00:05:28,416 --> 00:05:30,517 - ♪ knockity-knock, don't knock back ♪ 153 00:05:30,584 --> 00:05:32,819 Just kidding, you can knock. It's your office. 154 00:05:32,886 --> 00:05:34,054 Do you have a minute? 155 00:05:34,122 --> 00:05:37,824 - I'm very busy with time-sensitive work. 156 00:05:37,892 --> 00:05:39,525 - Not to go all Sherlock Holmes on you, 157 00:05:39,593 --> 00:05:41,026 But I can tell by the reflection in your glasses 158 00:05:41,094 --> 00:05:43,695 That you're entering points into weightwatchers.com. 159 00:05:43,763 --> 00:05:45,630 - If you don't enter them immediately, 160 00:05:45,698 --> 00:05:47,065 You forget. 161 00:05:47,132 --> 00:05:48,466 What? 162 00:05:48,534 --> 00:05:51,935 - I'm starting a band, and I need you on keyboards. 163 00:05:52,003 --> 00:05:53,203 - Nah. 164 00:05:53,271 --> 00:05:54,537 I play for pleasure. 165 00:05:54,605 --> 00:05:55,972 - This is for pleasure. 166 00:05:56,040 --> 00:05:57,740 - Wouldn't enjoy that. 167 00:05:57,808 --> 00:05:58,975 - I'm willing pay you. 168 00:05:59,042 --> 00:06:00,576 - Oh, yeah? - Yeah. 169 00:06:00,644 --> 00:06:02,544 - How much? - 60 bucks a session. 170 00:06:02,612 --> 00:06:04,079 - That's crazy money. 171 00:06:04,146 --> 00:06:05,080 I'll take 40. 172 00:06:05,147 --> 00:06:06,347 - Yes! 173 00:06:07,449 --> 00:06:08,549 - There he is. 174 00:06:10,351 --> 00:06:11,785 - Oh, no, that's a male model. 175 00:06:11,853 --> 00:06:13,085 - No, that's him. 176 00:06:13,153 --> 00:06:15,087 - That... 177 00:06:15,155 --> 00:06:17,589 Hello. 178 00:06:17,657 --> 00:06:19,458 Michael Scott, Dunder-Mifflin paper company. 179 00:06:19,526 --> 00:06:21,793 - Danny Cordray, Osprey paper. - Nice to meet you. 180 00:06:21,861 --> 00:06:23,628 - Three of you guys for one sale? 181 00:06:23,695 --> 00:06:24,962 - Yeah, well... 182 00:06:25,030 --> 00:06:26,230 We call it overkill. 183 00:06:26,298 --> 00:06:28,099 Why am I telling you my strategy? 184 00:06:28,166 --> 00:06:30,334 - Well, whatever works for you. 185 00:06:30,402 --> 00:06:31,602 Anyway, all right. 186 00:06:31,669 --> 00:06:32,669 - All right. - Good to see you guys. 187 00:06:32,737 --> 00:06:34,204 Nice to meet you. - Goodbye. 188 00:06:34,271 --> 00:06:36,706 I could swear that guy was a male model. 189 00:06:36,774 --> 00:06:37,707 - He's ready for you. 190 00:06:37,774 --> 00:06:39,341 - Oh, thank you. All right. 191 00:06:39,409 --> 00:06:40,843 On the count of three, it's showtime. 192 00:06:40,911 --> 00:06:42,711 Ready, one, two-- - no, I'm not doing that. 193 00:06:42,779 --> 00:06:44,245 - I've been in showtime mode since breakfast. 194 00:06:44,313 --> 00:06:45,880 - All right, just forget it then. 195 00:06:45,947 --> 00:06:46,880 - Showtime! - It's showtime! 196 00:06:46,948 --> 00:06:49,749 Oh...Never mind. Let's go. 197 00:06:49,817 --> 00:06:51,917 When I knock on your door, you know who it is. 198 00:06:51,985 --> 00:06:53,351 It's Michael Scott. 199 00:06:53,419 --> 00:06:55,086 We've been together forever, and-- 200 00:06:55,154 --> 00:06:57,790 - Michael, I appreciate everything that Dunder-Mifflin 201 00:06:57,858 --> 00:06:59,559 Has done for this company. - You know what? 202 00:06:59,627 --> 00:07:03,030 You are hang some problems with your loading dock. 203 00:07:03,098 --> 00:07:04,598 Are you not? All right. 204 00:07:04,666 --> 00:07:06,400 We're going to deliver to you on weekends. 205 00:07:06,468 --> 00:07:08,402 - That's very generous but-- 206 00:07:08,470 --> 00:07:10,003 - And you know what else we're gonna do? 207 00:07:10,071 --> 00:07:11,671 I can't believe I'm gonna say this. 208 00:07:11,739 --> 00:07:13,739 We are going to offer you our paper at cost. 209 00:07:13,807 --> 00:07:15,240 I know. 210 00:07:15,308 --> 00:07:16,942 I could get in a lotta trouble for this, 211 00:07:17,010 --> 00:07:18,510 So you'd better shake my hand right now. 212 00:07:18,578 --> 00:07:19,945 - He's not kidding. - Shake it, shake it! 213 00:07:20,013 --> 00:07:21,313 - Michael, I'm going with Danny. 214 00:07:21,380 --> 00:07:22,947 - Oh. 215 00:07:23,015 --> 00:07:24,115 - Thanks for coming in. 216 00:07:24,182 --> 00:07:27,184 - Okay. Thank you. 217 00:07:28,419 --> 00:07:30,654 - Jim talked too much. - No, I didn't. 218 00:07:30,721 --> 00:07:31,988 - Yes, you did. - Stop it. 219 00:07:32,055 --> 00:07:33,756 Just stop it. We did what we should have done. 220 00:07:33,824 --> 00:07:35,825 We just got bested. 221 00:07:37,361 --> 00:07:38,694 Why is there a door close button 222 00:07:38,762 --> 00:07:41,930 If it doesn't even close the door? 223 00:07:41,998 --> 00:07:44,266 How do I feel about losing the sale? 224 00:07:44,334 --> 00:07:48,003 It's like if Michael Phelps came out of retirement, 225 00:07:48,070 --> 00:07:51,906 Jumped in the pool, belly-flopped, and drowned. 226 00:07:51,974 --> 00:07:53,741 You know who we always lose out to? 227 00:07:53,808 --> 00:07:56,977 Staples, the big guys. 228 00:07:57,044 --> 00:07:59,145 Osprey? They're a small company. 229 00:07:59,213 --> 00:08:00,446 They're smaller than we are. 230 00:08:00,514 --> 00:08:03,415 What's our excuse? How do we combat this guy? 231 00:08:03,483 --> 00:08:04,983 Stanley, how do we combat him? 232 00:08:05,051 --> 00:08:06,084 - We sell better? 233 00:08:06,152 --> 00:08:07,686 - Okay. You know what? 234 00:08:07,754 --> 00:08:10,855 You clearly don't care, so why don't you just leave? 235 00:08:10,923 --> 00:08:13,124 - I would like to stay. This pertains to me. 236 00:08:13,192 --> 00:08:15,859 - Why don't you go outside and...take a shot of insulin 237 00:08:15,927 --> 00:08:17,426 And have a nap, okay? 238 00:08:17,494 --> 00:08:19,428 - Why do you always assume I have diabetes? 239 00:08:19,496 --> 00:08:21,029 - I don't know. Your frame, your build. 240 00:08:21,097 --> 00:08:22,831 Why don't you have a glass of apple juice 241 00:08:22,899 --> 00:08:24,099 And tell me you're not a diabetic. 242 00:08:25,601 --> 00:08:27,702 - See? I could tell by the sound you made when you stood up 243 00:08:27,770 --> 00:08:29,604 That you have--okay. Yes, Phyllis? 244 00:08:29,671 --> 00:08:31,105 - I could try to seduce him. 245 00:08:31,172 --> 00:08:32,539 - Oh, my god! 246 00:08:32,607 --> 00:08:35,175 - I know how we can learn his tricks. 247 00:08:35,243 --> 00:08:39,046 What I'm about to show you is of the utmost secrecy. 248 00:08:39,114 --> 00:08:41,515 - Is that your office? - Yes, Jim. 249 00:08:41,583 --> 00:08:43,851 And with a little tweaky, it becomes a different office. 250 00:08:43,918 --> 00:08:46,553 We lure Danny to it and watch him sell. 251 00:08:46,621 --> 00:08:48,454 - Ehh... - I'm outta here. 252 00:08:48,522 --> 00:08:50,456 - This is weird. - You know what this is? 253 00:08:50,524 --> 00:08:52,158 This is a stinger. - A what? 254 00:08:52,225 --> 00:08:55,427 - Like the movie. - Oh, you mean The Sting. 255 00:08:55,495 --> 00:08:57,896 - Paul Newman, Robert Redford. They're bank robbers? 256 00:08:57,964 --> 00:09:01,032 - Nope. Different movie. - The Sting. The Sting. 257 00:09:05,767 --> 00:09:07,567 - Your 2:00. 258 00:09:07,635 --> 00:09:08,735 - Thanks, hon. 259 00:09:08,802 --> 00:09:10,403 - Meredith was the perfect choice 260 00:09:10,471 --> 00:09:12,738 To play the head of the company. 261 00:09:12,806 --> 00:09:15,140 Her lunch break lined up with our appointment with Danny 262 00:09:15,208 --> 00:09:17,709 And...That's it. 263 00:09:17,776 --> 00:09:19,777 That's really all we were looking for. 264 00:09:19,845 --> 00:09:21,345 - Danny Cordray. It's great to meet you. 265 00:09:21,413 --> 00:09:22,947 - Meredith Van Helsing. Pleased to meet you. 266 00:09:23,015 --> 00:09:24,582 - Meredith Van Helsing? 267 00:09:24,649 --> 00:09:26,150 - Van Helsing was a respected professor 268 00:09:26,217 --> 00:09:28,085 Before he was a vampire killer. 269 00:09:28,153 --> 00:09:29,787 - Okay. But what is he more famous for? 270 00:09:29,854 --> 00:09:30,954 - Shh! 271 00:09:31,022 --> 00:09:33,023 Hey! That's my mug. 272 00:09:33,091 --> 00:09:34,858 - You know this isn't real TV, right? 273 00:09:34,926 --> 00:09:36,726 - Yes. 274 00:09:36,794 --> 00:09:39,930 ♪ please, Mr. President ♪ 275 00:09:40,031 --> 00:09:43,134 ♪ if you wanna give hope a whirl ♪ 276 00:09:43,201 --> 00:09:45,703 ♪ bring our troops home safe and sound ♪ 277 00:09:45,770 --> 00:09:48,939 ♪ says this little girl ♪ 278 00:09:49,006 --> 00:09:51,674 - ♪ please, Mr. President ♪ 279 00:09:51,742 --> 00:09:53,075 - One second, one second, one second. 280 00:09:53,143 --> 00:09:56,612 So...The song is from the point of view of a little girl. 281 00:09:56,680 --> 00:09:58,247 - Yeah. - But you're singing it. 282 00:09:58,314 --> 00:09:59,815 - Yeah. But I'm using my falsetto. 283 00:09:59,882 --> 00:10:02,584 - No, that's not a good idea. It's not a very good song. 284 00:10:02,652 --> 00:10:04,185 - Yeah, well, it'd sound a lot better 285 00:10:04,253 --> 00:10:06,253 If you actually sang with some soul. 286 00:10:06,321 --> 00:10:08,322 - Oh, I never sing with soul. - That's a lie. 287 00:10:08,390 --> 00:10:10,757 - I could sing it. - I just was hoping maybe 288 00:10:10,825 --> 00:10:12,192 You'd save your voice 289 00:10:12,259 --> 00:10:13,926 In case we did a novelty song about frogs. 290 00:10:13,994 --> 00:10:17,262 - But my voice is unique. Like Bob Dylan. 291 00:10:17,329 --> 00:10:18,496 - Okay, three-way argument 292 00:10:18,564 --> 00:10:20,364 Between a drummer, a keyboardist, 293 00:10:20,432 --> 00:10:22,199 And the front man lead singer. 294 00:10:22,267 --> 00:10:24,869 Wonder who's gonna win this one. 295 00:10:24,936 --> 00:10:27,271 Two, three, four-- 296 00:10:27,339 --> 00:10:29,273 - I'm gonna take off my coat, if you don't mind. 297 00:10:29,341 --> 00:10:32,042 It's a bit warm in here. 298 00:10:33,510 --> 00:10:34,944 - Hel...lo! 299 00:10:35,011 --> 00:10:36,678 - Oh, no, no, no. Don't... 300 00:10:36,746 --> 00:10:39,180 - People can't keep their true natures hidden for long, 301 00:10:39,248 --> 00:10:41,315 And this guy is smoldering like a tire fire. 302 00:10:41,383 --> 00:10:43,049 - Testify. - He's not that good-looking. 303 00:10:43,117 --> 00:10:44,584 I don't understand why everybody's-- 304 00:10:44,652 --> 00:10:46,053 - Yeah, he is that good-looking. 305 00:10:46,121 --> 00:10:47,455 - He's very, very handsome. - Okay. 306 00:10:47,523 --> 00:10:49,390 - That's a great set of shoulders you got there. 307 00:10:49,458 --> 00:10:52,193 What is that, genetics? 308 00:10:52,261 --> 00:10:53,228 Creatine? 309 00:10:54,363 --> 00:10:55,563 Sorry. 310 00:10:55,631 --> 00:10:57,799 Yeah. - Pull it together, all right? 311 00:10:57,867 --> 00:10:59,934 Stop lookin' at him. 312 00:11:00,002 --> 00:11:01,768 - I'm sorry. 313 00:11:04,070 --> 00:11:05,470 You're here to sell me some paper. 314 00:11:05,538 --> 00:11:08,240 - Well, actually, uh... No, miss Van Helsing. 315 00:11:08,308 --> 00:11:09,575 that's not why I'm here. 316 00:11:09,642 --> 00:11:11,076 I'm here to meet you, 317 00:11:11,143 --> 00:11:13,544 See if we'd be a, you know, good fit. 318 00:11:13,612 --> 00:11:15,546 - What do you mean? - Oh, my God! 319 00:11:15,613 --> 00:11:18,481 He's making her sell to him. 320 00:11:18,549 --> 00:11:20,116 ♪ bring our troops home ♪ 321 00:11:20,184 --> 00:11:21,684 ♪ safe and sound ♪ 322 00:11:21,752 --> 00:11:23,685 ♪ says this little girl ♪ 323 00:11:23,753 --> 00:11:25,486 - Okay. Honest feedback time. 324 00:11:25,554 --> 00:11:26,721 Oscar. 325 00:11:26,788 --> 00:11:28,023 - That's pandering. 326 00:11:28,091 --> 00:11:30,125 And it makes me think you think I'm stupid. 327 00:11:30,192 --> 00:11:32,060 - But do you think it could be famous? 328 00:11:32,127 --> 00:11:33,695 Like in a car commercial or something? 329 00:11:33,762 --> 00:11:34,862 - Not really. 330 00:11:34,930 --> 00:11:36,697 It's kinda weird that a grown man 331 00:11:36,765 --> 00:11:39,533 Is singing from the point of view of a little girl. 332 00:11:39,601 --> 00:11:42,135 - I feel like I can see someone ice skating to it. 333 00:11:42,203 --> 00:11:44,203 You know, like in the olympics. 334 00:11:44,271 --> 00:11:45,871 - I-I don't think they usually... 335 00:11:45,939 --> 00:11:48,807 Skate to such... bad songs. 336 00:11:48,874 --> 00:11:51,275 - Rude. And not helpful. 337 00:11:51,343 --> 00:11:53,711 - Well, I really, really, really liked it. 338 00:11:53,779 --> 00:11:56,481 - Well, that, really bums me out. 339 00:11:56,548 --> 00:11:58,917 - You're welcome. 340 00:11:58,984 --> 00:12:00,551 - We should think of this as a first date. 341 00:12:00,619 --> 00:12:02,118 - and I think it's going 342 00:12:02,186 --> 00:12:04,052 Very well. How 'bout you? 343 00:12:04,120 --> 00:12:06,520 - Real well. Uh... 344 00:12:06,588 --> 00:12:08,588 Feels more like a third date to me. 345 00:12:08,656 --> 00:12:09,923 - Ha ha. There you go! 346 00:12:11,959 --> 00:12:14,259 - Stay-- - shut up and let me do this! 347 00:12:14,327 --> 00:12:16,261 You know, 348 00:12:16,328 --> 00:12:19,430 What is with this desk keeping us so far apart? 349 00:12:19,497 --> 00:12:20,997 - I've never been a desk man. 350 00:12:21,065 --> 00:12:24,934 Always traveling on the road. Come on, why not, huh? 351 00:12:24,969 --> 00:12:27,136 - Oh... - Well, we'll get this... 352 00:12:29,539 --> 00:12:31,072 - Oh... - Oh, man. 353 00:12:31,140 --> 00:12:32,240 - So...What's your drink? 354 00:12:32,307 --> 00:12:35,142 You a vodka man? Me too. 355 00:12:35,210 --> 00:12:37,177 - We gotta get someone else in there right now. 356 00:12:37,245 --> 00:12:39,145 You're an exec at Pennsylvania SolarTech. 357 00:12:39,180 --> 00:12:40,580 - That sounds fake. - What do you mean? 358 00:12:40,648 --> 00:12:41,781 - I told you. 359 00:12:41,849 --> 00:12:43,182 You're an exec at Stark industries, 360 00:12:43,250 --> 00:12:45,017 A corporation you inherited from your father. 361 00:12:45,085 --> 00:12:46,218 - Stop it. Here's the story. 362 00:12:46,286 --> 00:12:48,153 They need Meredith somewhere else ASAP, okay? 363 00:12:48,221 --> 00:12:49,488 So you're taking over. 364 00:12:49,555 --> 00:12:51,522 You just gotta get her out of there as soon as you can. 365 00:12:51,590 --> 00:12:52,690 - I can do that. Then what? 366 00:12:52,757 --> 00:12:54,025 - Then make him pitch to you. 367 00:12:54,093 --> 00:12:55,493 You gotta see what he's got. - Exactly. 368 00:12:55,561 --> 00:12:57,462 - Okay, and remember. You're not gay. 369 00:12:57,530 --> 00:12:59,031 - Stop it. It's gonna be great. 370 00:12:59,098 --> 00:13:02,101 And listen, if anything else happens, just... roll with it. 371 00:13:04,337 --> 00:13:06,170 - Meredith, I-- - oh, Manuel. 372 00:13:06,238 --> 00:13:08,572 This is Manuel, my cleaning man. 373 00:13:08,640 --> 00:13:10,007 He doesn't speak any English. 374 00:13:10,075 --> 00:13:12,276 - Hola. ¿que tal? 375 00:13:12,343 --> 00:13:14,211 - ¿como estas? 376 00:13:14,278 --> 00:13:17,647 - Uh, Manuel, cleano el window. 377 00:13:17,715 --> 00:13:19,816 - Who else we got? 378 00:13:21,284 --> 00:13:25,019 - Okay. You're a young hotshot from Stark industries. 379 00:13:25,087 --> 00:13:27,188 You've just bought this company. Meredith is fired. 380 00:13:27,256 --> 00:13:29,690 It's a whole new regime. He's gotta pitch to you now. 381 00:13:29,758 --> 00:13:31,658 - Okay. Stark industries isn't real. 382 00:13:31,726 --> 00:13:33,760 I run google. Larry and Sergey brought me-- 383 00:13:33,828 --> 00:13:35,795 - That sounds awesome. Just have him pitch to you. 384 00:13:35,863 --> 00:13:38,264 - Don't let us down. - Will do. Won't do. 385 00:13:38,331 --> 00:13:41,099 - Yeah, sure. - You smell like a Scorpio. 386 00:13:41,166 --> 00:13:44,368 - This is Esteban, another cleaning man. 387 00:13:44,436 --> 00:13:46,404 He doesn't speak English either. 388 00:13:46,471 --> 00:13:48,906 Esteban, el flooro. 389 00:13:54,945 --> 00:13:56,712 - You know what? 390 00:13:56,780 --> 00:13:58,380 I may have parked my car in a compact space, 391 00:13:58,448 --> 00:14:00,048 And I hate when I see others do that, so-- 392 00:14:00,115 --> 00:14:02,049 - Danny, I feel a real connection to you, 393 00:14:02,117 --> 00:14:03,617 And I gotta get real. 394 00:14:03,685 --> 00:14:05,018 - No. No, no, no. - No, no, no, no, no! 395 00:14:05,086 --> 00:14:06,553 I'm goin' in! - Michael! 396 00:14:06,620 --> 00:14:08,154 No, Michael, stop it! No! 397 00:14:08,221 --> 00:14:09,889 - Stop, stop! Oh, my God! 398 00:14:09,956 --> 00:14:12,324 Okay. Stop it, stop it, stop it. 399 00:14:12,392 --> 00:14:13,825 Gross! Stop it, please. 400 00:14:13,893 --> 00:14:16,428 Everybody stop. - Michael Scott. 401 00:14:16,496 --> 00:14:17,896 - I said stop. 402 00:14:19,672 --> 00:14:20,738 - Okay, Danny... 403 00:14:20,806 --> 00:14:22,073 This is not Pennsylvania SolarTech. 404 00:14:22,141 --> 00:14:24,475 This is Dunder-Mifflin paper company. 405 00:14:24,543 --> 00:14:26,310 This is Meredith Palmer. - Pleased to meet you. 406 00:14:26,377 --> 00:14:28,210 - Don't--stay away from him, please just leave. 407 00:14:28,278 --> 00:14:29,945 Get out of here. Go. Forever. 408 00:14:30,013 --> 00:14:32,980 - Hmm. - I owe you... 409 00:14:33,047 --> 00:14:34,481 A most sincere and humble apology. 410 00:14:34,549 --> 00:14:36,882 We were trying to watch you to see your sales technique 411 00:14:36,950 --> 00:14:39,584 So we could stop losing so many clients to you. 412 00:14:39,651 --> 00:14:40,751 - But from where? 413 00:14:40,819 --> 00:14:42,752 - A surveillance room next to this one. 414 00:14:42,820 --> 00:14:45,653 - Okay, so you... Set up this fake company, 415 00:14:45,721 --> 00:14:47,555 Then you hired this homeless woman 416 00:14:47,623 --> 00:14:50,790 To impersonate an executive to spy on me 417 00:14:50,858 --> 00:14:52,829 So that you could copy my sales technique. 418 00:14:52,896 --> 00:14:54,898 - Yes. And it's the sincerest form of flattery. 419 00:14:54,966 --> 00:14:56,566 - Or...Crazy. 420 00:14:56,634 --> 00:14:57,900 - Well-- - I'm gonna go. 421 00:14:57,968 --> 00:15:00,135 - Okay. You know what, it wasn't just me. 422 00:15:00,236 --> 00:15:02,471 Jim and Dwight are behind that wall 423 00:15:02,538 --> 00:15:05,173 In the surveillance room, and was their plan as well. 424 00:15:05,240 --> 00:15:06,641 - no!! - No, no, no, no. 425 00:15:06,708 --> 00:15:07,941 - Oh, well, then, yeah. All right, hey! 426 00:15:08,009 --> 00:15:10,243 Good luck, guys! 427 00:15:10,310 --> 00:15:12,411 Seems like you got a great operation here. 428 00:15:12,478 --> 00:15:13,979 - No, we don't. Here's...Here's my point. 429 00:15:14,046 --> 00:15:16,916 Danny, listen, you have to understand 430 00:15:16,984 --> 00:15:19,185 That we are not normally like this. 431 00:15:19,252 --> 00:15:21,086 We just--we wanted to know your tricks. 432 00:15:21,154 --> 00:15:23,154 - What do you mean, tricks? There's no tricks, man. 433 00:15:23,222 --> 00:15:24,923 I'm just a good salesman. 434 00:15:24,990 --> 00:15:26,524 You wanna copy that? You can't copy that! 435 00:15:26,591 --> 00:15:27,758 - You are, you are. You are! 436 00:15:27,826 --> 00:15:28,959 Stop it, stop it. 437 00:15:29,027 --> 00:15:31,161 Stop. You are a good salesman. 438 00:15:31,229 --> 00:15:34,031 And because of that... 439 00:15:34,099 --> 00:15:36,033 I want you to work for me. 440 00:15:36,100 --> 00:15:37,967 - Sure. You seem like a fun, professional guy. 441 00:15:38,035 --> 00:15:39,268 - So you will. - No! 442 00:15:39,336 --> 00:15:40,936 - Hold it, hold it, hold it, hold on. 443 00:15:41,004 --> 00:15:44,172 Hold on. Wait, wait, wait, wait. Wait. 444 00:15:44,240 --> 00:15:45,606 Danny, I want you to look at me. 445 00:15:46,875 --> 00:15:48,909 Do you want your life to be better 446 00:15:48,977 --> 00:15:51,044 Or to be worse or to stay the same? 447 00:15:51,111 --> 00:15:52,779 - Get out of my way. - Answer the question. 448 00:15:52,846 --> 00:15:54,313 Do you want a better life, Danny? 449 00:15:54,381 --> 00:15:57,283 - I swear to God, I'm gonna hit you. 450 00:15:57,351 --> 00:15:58,852 I didn't mean that. I'm sorry. 451 00:15:58,919 --> 00:16:01,020 I'm not--it's just I'm very upset right now. 452 00:16:01,088 --> 00:16:02,622 I'm very upset! - I know, I know. 453 00:16:02,690 --> 00:16:04,524 Do you want more freedom, less freedom, 454 00:16:04,591 --> 00:16:06,092 or to stay the same? 455 00:16:06,159 --> 00:16:07,760 More freedom. 456 00:16:07,828 --> 00:16:09,761 - I can give you more money. 457 00:16:09,829 --> 00:16:11,363 There's your better life. 458 00:16:11,431 --> 00:16:13,499 I can let you come and go as you please. 459 00:16:13,567 --> 00:16:15,300 There's your freedom. 460 00:16:15,368 --> 00:16:16,835 And you already know Dunder-Mifflin 461 00:16:16,903 --> 00:16:19,104 has the best service and the best prices. 462 00:16:19,172 --> 00:16:20,872 But you beat us anyway. 463 00:16:20,940 --> 00:16:22,841 - Can you imagine 464 00:16:22,908 --> 00:16:26,076 how well you would do selling our stuff? 465 00:16:29,181 --> 00:16:31,549 Everyone, may I have your attention? 466 00:16:31,617 --> 00:16:34,786 I would like to introduce you to Mr. Danny Cordray. 467 00:16:34,853 --> 00:16:38,957 He's going to be joining us as our new traveling salesman. 468 00:16:39,025 --> 00:16:40,392 Say hello to Danny! 469 00:16:40,459 --> 00:16:42,328 - me. 470 00:16:42,395 --> 00:16:44,230 - Okay. You know what? 471 00:16:44,298 --> 00:16:45,899 No. No. 472 00:16:45,966 --> 00:16:48,668 This is not some sort of construction site 473 00:16:48,736 --> 00:16:50,036 Or all of Italy 474 00:16:50,104 --> 00:16:52,138 Where you can just go around treating people like meat. 475 00:16:52,206 --> 00:16:53,840 We are to respect him. 476 00:16:53,908 --> 00:16:57,542 I respect him because he reminds me of somebody. 477 00:16:57,610 --> 00:16:59,476 Can anybody guess who that is? 478 00:16:59,544 --> 00:17:01,912 - Josh Duhamel. - Yeah, I can see that! 479 00:17:01,979 --> 00:17:04,680 - No. No. No. Somebody in this office. 480 00:17:04,748 --> 00:17:06,815 - He's like a better-looking Andy. 481 00:17:06,883 --> 00:17:08,082 - Thanks, Kevin. 482 00:17:08,150 --> 00:17:10,751 - No. Me. Right? 483 00:17:10,819 --> 00:17:13,420 Sorta like...A little younger version of me. 484 00:17:13,488 --> 00:17:15,489 - It's hard to judge ourselves accurately, isn't it? 485 00:17:15,557 --> 00:17:16,557 - Michael. - Yes. 486 00:17:16,624 --> 00:17:17,791 - Can I talk to you about something? 487 00:17:17,859 --> 00:17:19,192 - No, you may not. 488 00:17:19,259 --> 00:17:20,660 - It's about this very announcement you just made. 489 00:17:20,728 --> 00:17:22,095 - I just said no. - Michael-- 490 00:17:22,163 --> 00:17:24,064 - Michael, I think you really want to talk to him. 491 00:17:24,131 --> 00:17:25,565 - Okay, let's-- all right, all right. 492 00:17:25,632 --> 00:17:27,232 Let's talk. Please don't let him leave. 493 00:17:27,299 --> 00:17:28,599 Don't leave. - Gotcha. 494 00:17:28,667 --> 00:17:31,300 - You hired him? - Guys, let me ask you something. 495 00:17:31,368 --> 00:17:33,035 Do you want your life to be better or worse 496 00:17:33,102 --> 00:17:35,003 - Or stay the same? - Stay the same. 497 00:17:35,070 --> 00:17:38,204 - Okay. Well...Get ready, 'cause it's gonna get better. 498 00:17:38,272 --> 00:17:39,606 - It's not gonna get better. 499 00:17:39,674 --> 00:17:41,108 He's gonna steal all of our clients. 500 00:17:41,175 --> 00:17:42,576 - No. No. Wrong. 501 00:17:42,643 --> 00:17:44,210 He would have stolen your clients, 502 00:17:44,278 --> 00:17:46,012 But you know what? He can't now. 503 00:17:46,080 --> 00:17:48,681 This guy used to steal sales from us. 504 00:17:48,749 --> 00:17:50,583 Now he's going to steal sales for us. 505 00:17:50,650 --> 00:17:52,385 - Where's he gonna sit? There's no more seats. 506 00:17:52,452 --> 00:17:54,620 - He doesn't need to sit. He's a traveling salesman. 507 00:17:54,688 --> 00:17:57,089 Look, I am not going to exclude good people from our staff 508 00:17:57,157 --> 00:17:59,624 simply because they are threatening to you. 509 00:17:59,692 --> 00:18:01,426 And unless you have a better argument than that, 510 00:18:01,494 --> 00:18:02,861 I suggest you leave. 511 00:18:02,928 --> 00:18:04,628 - Mm! 512 00:18:04,696 --> 00:18:05,896 - Where's he gonna park? 513 00:18:05,964 --> 00:18:07,932 There's no more reserved parking spots. 514 00:18:07,999 --> 00:18:09,166 - Good-bye! 515 00:18:12,769 --> 00:18:15,069 - Songs about truth. - Yeah. 516 00:18:15,137 --> 00:18:16,770 - What's something you really care about? 517 00:18:16,838 --> 00:18:19,039 - Reverse snobbery. 518 00:18:19,108 --> 00:18:20,207 - More universal. 519 00:18:20,275 --> 00:18:23,109 - Sometimes I feel like life has passed me by. 520 00:18:24,811 --> 00:18:28,214 - ♪ couldn't get outta bed today ♪ 521 00:18:28,281 --> 00:18:30,716 ♪ wish the alarm clock would go away ♪ 522 00:18:30,784 --> 00:18:31,951 - Oh, nice! 523 00:18:32,019 --> 00:18:33,252 - Holy crap. Are you kidding me? 524 00:18:33,320 --> 00:18:35,155 You just made that-- that's amazing. 525 00:18:35,222 --> 00:18:36,289 - Go ahead. 526 00:18:36,357 --> 00:18:38,625 - ♪ which me am I gonna be today ♪ 527 00:18:38,693 --> 00:18:40,994 - ♪ which me am I gonna be today ♪ 528 00:18:41,061 --> 00:18:43,797 - ♪ I got a closet full of mes ♪ 529 00:18:43,865 --> 00:18:47,567 ♪ am I gonna be the happy me ♪ 530 00:18:47,635 --> 00:18:50,036 - ♪ or the me that stinks ♪ 531 00:18:50,103 --> 00:18:52,805 - Oh, my gosh. We're almost out of time. 532 00:18:52,873 --> 00:18:54,340 How much for another half hour? 533 00:18:54,407 --> 00:18:56,775 - Oh, don't worry about it. 534 00:18:56,843 --> 00:18:58,277 - Wait. Seriously? 535 00:18:58,345 --> 00:18:59,612 - Yeah. 536 00:18:59,679 --> 00:19:02,147 - So we're just like jamming as friends? 537 00:19:02,215 --> 00:19:04,917 - One, two, three, hit it. 538 00:19:04,984 --> 00:19:06,852 - ♪ closet full of me ♪ 539 00:19:06,919 --> 00:19:08,720 - Oh, you know... Funny. 540 00:19:08,788 --> 00:19:11,390 Your wife and I went on a few dates. 541 00:19:11,458 --> 00:19:12,958 - Did ya? 542 00:19:13,026 --> 00:19:14,260 - Yeah, way, way, way back. 543 00:19:14,327 --> 00:19:15,828 - I'm just kidding. She told me about it. 544 00:19:15,896 --> 00:19:17,997 - Oh. Yeah. She was not into me. 545 00:19:18,065 --> 00:19:19,465 - Oh. - Obviously. 546 00:19:19,533 --> 00:19:20,833 - I don't even think she called me back. 547 00:19:20,901 --> 00:19:23,169 - You snubbed her. - Dwight, please. 548 00:19:23,236 --> 00:19:24,503 - Let me handle this, Jim. 549 00:19:24,571 --> 00:19:26,304 Drop the act, Cordray. Okay? 550 00:19:26,372 --> 00:19:28,140 We all know that you probably thought 551 00:19:28,208 --> 00:19:32,177 that Pam was too "meh" or thin without being toned. 552 00:19:32,244 --> 00:19:33,711 But I wanna tell you something. 553 00:19:33,779 --> 00:19:35,647 She is one of the plain, hearty women of Scranton 554 00:19:35,714 --> 00:19:37,882 that make this city great. 555 00:19:37,950 --> 00:19:39,417 And so what if she doesn't wear makeup? 556 00:19:39,484 --> 00:19:41,485 - we like her better that way! 557 00:19:41,553 --> 00:19:43,253 And you steal clients, don't you? 558 00:19:43,321 --> 00:19:45,222 Don't you! 559 00:19:45,290 --> 00:19:46,523 - Okay...That's different. 560 00:19:46,591 --> 00:19:48,091 - Oh, that's different, is it? 561 00:19:48,159 --> 00:19:49,559 Okay, thief. 562 00:19:49,627 --> 00:19:51,427 You better check your things, people. 563 00:19:51,495 --> 00:19:53,396 In fact, where are my keys? 564 00:19:53,463 --> 00:19:55,598 Oh. They're in my pocket. 565 00:19:55,665 --> 00:19:57,266 False alarm. 566 00:19:57,334 --> 00:19:59,768 Okay. 567 00:20:01,438 --> 00:20:04,106 So you're... Gonna be workin' here. 568 00:20:04,173 --> 00:20:06,475 - Uh...I mean... 569 00:20:06,543 --> 00:20:07,776 Yeah. 570 00:20:07,844 --> 00:20:10,278 - Welcome aboard. 571 00:20:11,747 --> 00:20:13,514 - Thank you. 572 00:20:13,582 --> 00:20:15,516 - Hey, crazy, um... 573 00:20:15,584 --> 00:20:18,919 So...That's it? You're just--you're fine? 574 00:20:18,987 --> 00:20:22,221 - It's after 5:00, Jim. I'm not gonna take this home. 575 00:20:22,289 --> 00:20:24,023 - Oh. - Pleasure. 576 00:20:24,090 --> 00:20:25,524 - Thanks. 577 00:20:25,592 --> 00:20:28,359 - This morning, Danny Cordray stole a sale from me. 578 00:20:28,427 --> 00:20:29,627 So what do I do? 579 00:20:29,695 --> 00:20:31,796 I go out and I steal Danny Cordray. 580 00:20:31,864 --> 00:20:33,564 The sale that mattered, I made. 581 00:20:33,632 --> 00:20:34,798 Boom. 582 00:20:34,866 --> 00:20:36,566 Funny thing about it, we don't even need him. 583 00:20:36,634 --> 00:20:39,202 We already have Packer on the road. 584 00:20:39,269 --> 00:20:40,202 Ccchhh! Crap. 585 00:20:40,270 --> 00:20:41,971 I forgot about Packer. 586 00:20:43,038 --> 00:20:46,872 Sync & Corrections by Alex1969 www.addic7ed.com 587 00:20:47,072 --> 00:20:48,972 - Can't tear yourself away from "The Office"? 588 00:20:49,072 --> 00:20:51,672 You don't have to. There's more, coming up next. 589 00:20:52,543 --> 00:20:53,510 - ♪ sun's in her eyes ♪ 590 00:20:53,578 --> 00:20:54,878 ♪ tongue full of flies ♪ 591 00:20:54,946 --> 00:20:56,781 ♪ would you like to share my pad ♪ 592 00:20:57,848 --> 00:20:59,881 ♪ croak, croak, croak ♪ 593 00:21:00,848 --> 00:21:10,848 ♪ ♪