1
00:00:00,946 --> 00:00:02,404
What about this one?
2
00:00:02,572 --> 00:00:03,697
{\It's k}Kinda bad ass, right?
3
00:00:05,742 --> 00:00:08,399
Just seems kind of crazy
in the way I might need{\ right} now.
4
00:00:08,524 --> 00:00:09,590
I don't know.
5
00:00:10,090 --> 00:00:13,205
That's not yours.
6
00:00:13,375 --> 00:00:16,001
Stanley just drunk OJ out of my mug
7
00:00:16,169 --> 00:00:19,501
and didn't seem to realize
that it wasn't his hot coffee.
8
00:00:19,626 --> 00:00:21,631
So the question has to be asked.
9
00:00:22,019 --> 00:00:24,669
Is there no limit
to what he won't notice?
10
00:00:25,733 --> 00:00:27,886
What's a seven letter word
for purse?
11
00:00:29,367 --> 00:00:30,254
Sachet.
12
00:00:30,684 --> 00:00:31,975
No, starts with an H.
13
00:00:32,589 --> 00:00:33,489
Handbag.
14
00:00:35,083 --> 00:00:36,021
Thank you.
15
00:00:50,489 --> 00:00:52,287
All right, everybody.
Take a seat.
16
00:00:52,455 --> 00:00:55,624
As you may have heard,
our branch on the planet Jupiter
17
00:00:55,792 --> 00:00:58,208
is up 8,000% in sales.
18
00:01:02,912 --> 00:01:04,923
Hold up.
That clock is slow.
19
00:01:05,093 --> 00:01:06,301
It is 5:00.
20
00:01:07,020 --> 00:01:09,133
I will see you all tomorrow.
21
00:01:09,258 --> 00:01:10,812
Bye, Stanley.
Love you.
22
00:01:14,124 --> 00:01:16,874
- So long, Stanley.
- Good night, everybody.
23
00:01:22,152 --> 00:01:24,568
- Feygnasse Team -
24
00:01:24,738 --> 00:01:26,071
.:: La Fabrique ::.
25
00:01:40,709 --> 00:01:42,671
{\pos(270,155)}7x06: Costume Contest
26
00:01:42,839 --> 00:01:46,127
What kind of statement are you making
with that costume, Kevin?
27
00:01:46,252 --> 00:01:48,269
{\pos(120,268)}The statement that I'm making,
Oscar,
28
00:01:48,394 --> 00:01:50,844
{\pos(120,268)}is I kind of look
like Michael Moore.
29
00:01:52,662 --> 00:01:54,099
Dunder-Mifflin, this is Erin.
30
00:01:54,267 --> 00:01:56,768
Happy Halloween.
How can I haunt you today?
31
00:01:56,936 --> 00:01:59,189
A lot of people
{\are really }get{\ting} into Halloween this year.
32
00:01:59,314 --> 00:02:00,817
{\pos(120,268)}Six seconds, MacGruber!
33
00:02:00,942 --> 00:02:03,101
{\pos(120,268)}Pam's got a lot
of fun stuff planned.
34
00:02:03,681 --> 00:02:04,923
{\pos(120,268)}Two seconds, MacGruber!
35
00:02:05,048 --> 00:02:08,361
{\pos(120,268)}Including a costume contest
and bobbing for apples
36
00:02:08,486 --> 00:02:10,394
and a Ouija board.
Oh, boom!
37
00:02:11,143 --> 00:02:12,143
Explosion!
38
00:02:12,268 --> 00:02:13,702
MacGruber!
39
00:02:14,412 --> 00:02:17,080
People are really
into the costume contest this year.
40
00:02:17,519 --> 00:02:18,957
Might {\have something to do with}be thanks to the prize.
41
00:02:19,125 --> 00:02:20,434
Maybe you've heard of it.
42
00:02:20,794 --> 00:02:23,284
{\pos(120,268)}The 2011 Scranton/Wilkes-barre
coupon book,
43
00:02:23,409 --> 00:02:26,630
{\pos(120,268)}worth over $15,000 in savings.
44
00:02:28,652 --> 00:02:30,158
{\pos(120,268)}- Stop.
- Too late.
45
00:02:30,283 --> 00:02:33,382
If I was the real Scranton strangler,
you'd be so strangled by now.
46
00:02:34,086 --> 00:02:36,647
And if you're out there, strangler,
you'll get caught.
47
00:02:36,772 --> 00:02:37,772
By me.
48
00:02:38,436 --> 00:02:40,092
{\pos(120,268)}{\Sounds like s}Someone's{\ really} trying to convince us
49
00:02:40,217 --> 00:02:41,750
{\pos(120,268)}{\that }he's not the Scranton strangler.
50
00:02:41,875 --> 00:02:43,647
{\pos(120,268)}To my chickens,
I'm the Scranton strangler.
51
00:02:45,746 --> 00:02:47,359
{\pos(120,268)}That's very funny.
52
00:02:47,936 --> 00:02:50,280
{\pos(120,268)}{\Looks like s}Someone decided to dress up
as ol' Dwight Schrute's mom.
53
00:02:51,063 --> 00:02:53,496
{\pos(120,268)}You're only 1/3 as beautiful
and about half her height.
54
00:02:53,621 --> 00:02:55,285
{\pos(120,268)}I'm supposed to be Olive Oyl.
55
00:02:55,453 --> 00:02:58,735
{\pos(120,268)}And it makes more sense
when I'm standing next to Popeye,
56
00:02:58,860 --> 00:03:01,321
{\pos(120,268)}but Jim doesn't want
to put his costume on.
57
00:03:01,446 --> 00:03:02,546
{\pos(120,268)}I am Popeye.
58
00:03:03,041 --> 00:03:05,195
{\pos(120,268)}I've never really
been a costume guy.
59
00:03:05,713 --> 00:03:09,213
Even when I was a kid,
it just felt like {\something }I was too old for.
60
00:03:09,718 --> 00:03:12,748
And then, this morning,
Pam hands me this little number.
61
00:03:15,932 --> 00:03:18,902
{\pos(120,268)}In case you can't read
my-my-my poker face,
62
00:03:20,605 --> 00:03:22,811
{\pos(120,268)}we'll be reviewing
our sales policies.
63
00:03:23,940 --> 00:03:27,067
{\pos(120,268)}I have ten seconds to explain them
or this whole place blows up.
64
00:03:27,235 --> 00:03:28,720
MacGruber!
65
00:03:29,677 --> 00:03:30,477
Lame.
66
00:03:31,781 --> 00:03:34,487
- Why don't witches wear panties?
- Here we go.
67
00:03:34,612 --> 00:03:36,576
Because they need to grip the broom.
68
00:03:38,855 --> 00:03:40,842
{\pos(110,268)}Who likes to water-ski
on Lake Erie?
69
00:03:40,967 --> 00:03:41,954
{\pos(120,268)}No, what...
70
00:03:42,530 --> 00:03:44,117
{\pos(120,268)}Where does Dracula
like to water-ski?
71
00:03:44,242 --> 00:03:45,065
{\pos(120,268)}Lake Erie.
72
00:03:45,190 --> 00:03:47,138
{\pos(120,268)}When our warehouse workers
make deliveries,
73
00:03:47,263 --> 00:03:49,756
{\pos(120,268)}they're gonna be encouraged
to offer clients extra products.
74
00:03:50,331 --> 00:03:52,092
{\pos(120,268)}{\And then t}They'll split those commissions
with sales.
75
00:03:52,260 --> 00:03:54,602
{\pos(120,268)}{\Wait, so d}Drivers are gonna be able
to sell paper on the road?
76
00:03:54,727 --> 00:03:55,929
{\pos(120,268)}That is correct.
77
00:03:56,097 --> 00:03:58,138
{\pos(120,268)}Has anyone
started calling you Gabe-wad yet?
78
00:03:58,308 --> 00:03:59,264
Not here.
79
00:03:59,434 --> 00:04:00,434
Gabe-wad.
80
00:04:01,600 --> 00:04:03,103
{\pos(120,268)}Okay, guys, fun is fun...
81
00:04:05,765 --> 00:04:06,563
Blacula.
82
00:04:06,885 --> 00:04:07,731
Dracula.
83
00:04:08,023 --> 00:04:09,023
Oh, so...
84
00:04:09,637 --> 00:04:12,195
I almost forgot.
You'll find this hilarious.
85
00:04:12,640 --> 00:04:16,512
Apparently,
corporate is going to have drivers
86
00:04:16,637 --> 00:04:19,077
sell paper on their routes now.
87
00:04:19,245 --> 00:04:21,997
That's like exactly
sort of the idea that you had.
88
00:04:23,731 --> 00:04:25,959
I do remember
saying something like that to you.
89
00:04:28,997 --> 00:04:29,939
I'm sorry.
90
00:04:30,502 --> 00:04:33,048
I blew this.
You should've gotten credit for that.
91
00:04:33,218 --> 00:04:34,466
{\I'm just g}Glad we'll try it out.
92
00:04:34,636 --> 00:04:36,593
- Really? We're good?
- We're cool.
93
00:04:38,473 --> 00:04:40,140
- Okay.
- What's{\ that} in your shirt?
94
00:04:41,856 --> 00:04:43,386
That's a ream of paper.
95
00:04:43,820 --> 00:04:45,410
Thought you might hit me.
96
00:04:46,064 --> 00:04:49,745
Darryl Philbin
is the greatest guy in the world.
97
00:04:50,340 --> 00:04:51,364
You know what{\ I'd like}?
98
00:04:51,489 --> 00:04:54,262
I would like to have all the racists
99
00:04:54,387 --> 00:04:55,594
brought together
100
00:04:55,719 --> 00:04:58,119
and take Darryl Philbin
out to lunch.
101
00:04:58,576 --> 00:05:00,200
{\Just t}To see what they're missing.
102
00:05:00,659 --> 00:05:02,662
- It's a great stick, right?
- {\It's r}Really good.
103
00:05:02,948 --> 00:05:05,415
Classic.
I feel like you might win {\the whole thing }with that.
104
00:05:06,208 --> 00:05:07,667
Everyone realizes
105
00:05:07,835 --> 00:05:10,045
this coupon book
isn't {\actually }worth $15,000, right?
106
00:05:10,872 --> 00:05:13,632
You'd have to spend $200,000
on crap you don't even need
107
00:05:13,910 --> 00:05:15,634
to get $15,000 worth of benefits.
108
00:05:16,187 --> 00:05:18,428
I'm not the only one
who sees this, right?
109
00:05:19,752 --> 00:05:21,181
I get that.
I get that.
110
00:05:21,849 --> 00:05:22,849
Excuse me{\, everyone}.
111
00:05:23,017 --> 00:05:24,276
I wanna invite you all
112
00:05:24,401 --> 00:05:26,353
to the Halloween party
I'm having at my bar.
113
00:05:26,521 --> 00:05:27,811
You own a bar?
114
00:05:27,981 --> 00:05:29,938
Public school at exit 11?
115
00:05:30,539 --> 00:05:31,608
That's a great...
116
00:05:31,895 --> 00:05:32,695
name.
117
00:05:33,637 --> 00:05:34,637
{\You're h}Hilarious.
118
00:05:35,146 --> 00:05:35,946
A-plus.
119
00:05:37,156 --> 00:05:38,518
You're all on the list.
120
00:05:38,779 --> 00:05:40,708
Man, can I get a plus-five?
121
00:05:40,833 --> 00:05:41,785
It's all guys.
122
00:05:41,953 --> 00:05:44,579
What's the crowd like, Danny?
Our age?
123
00:05:46,570 --> 00:05:48,708
I don't think that she'd leave Jim
124
00:05:48,876 --> 00:05:49,747
for Danny.
125
00:05:49,872 --> 00:05:51,950
I don't know.
They're both handsome.
126
00:05:52,075 --> 00:05:53,202
Pam is gonna choose
127
00:05:53,327 --> 00:05:56,005
whoever has a scent
most like that of her father.
128
00:05:56,130 --> 00:05:57,676
{\Does anyone remember w}What her dad smelled like?
129
00:05:58,035 --> 00:06:00,178
Hey, gang, quiet.
Here she comes.
130
00:06:01,178 --> 00:06:04,385
Did you hear about that Danny guy?
Heard he used to date Pam.
131
00:06:05,143 --> 00:06:07,721
So, four years ago,
when I was in Stanford, Connecticut
132
00:06:07,846 --> 00:06:09,309
and dating someone else,
133
00:06:09,434 --> 00:06:11,451
Pam went on two dates with Danny.
134
00:06:11,576 --> 00:06:13,857
Which was{\ obviously} the greatest love story
ever told,
135
00:06:13,984 --> 00:06:16,130
given how much people
walk on eggshells around us.
136
00:06:16,255 --> 00:06:18,255
- We were{\ *basically} Romeo and Juliet.
- That's right.
137
00:06:18,380 --> 00:06:20,490
Except where Juliet
doesn't have that great a time,
138
00:06:20,615 --> 00:06:23,229
and Romeo doesn't call back
after two dates.
139
00:06:23,636 --> 00:06:25,484
But I've learned to love again.
140
00:06:26,540 --> 00:06:28,140
He's a cartoon sailor.
141
00:06:28,265 --> 00:06:30,483
And he looks so handsome
in his uniform.
142
00:06:30,608 --> 00:06:31,626
- Please.
- No.
143
00:06:32,251 --> 00:06:33,051
Tuna.
144
00:06:33,870 --> 00:06:34,670
Tuna.
145
00:06:35,924 --> 00:06:38,465
- If you want us to skip this party...
- I don't care.
146
00:06:38,635 --> 00:06:41,428
I am never gonna forget
what Danny did to Pam.
147
00:06:41,596 --> 00:06:42,946
I forget nothing.
148
00:06:43,808 --> 00:06:45,222
I'm like an elephant{\ in that way}.
149
00:06:45,347 --> 00:06:47,089
You know what eleph... this...
150
00:06:47,214 --> 00:06:49,014
This sucks for Jim, right?
151
00:06:49,139 --> 00:06:50,677
But it also sucks for us,
152
00:06:50,802 --> 00:06:53,530
because we don't get invited
to a ton of Halloween parties.
153
00:06:54,108 --> 00:06:56,233
And{\, like,} everyone's gonna be there.
154
00:06:56,358 --> 00:06:57,453
Stanley,
155
00:06:58,037 --> 00:06:58,935
Phyllis,
156
00:06:59,060 --> 00:07:00,023
Angela,
157
00:07:00,481 --> 00:07:01,331
Darryl.
158
00:07:01,730 --> 00:07:03,825
- Creed's a maybe.
- Creed's going?
159
00:07:06,556 --> 00:07:09,539
Madge from the warehouse
Just made her first sale.
160
00:07:10,366 --> 00:07:11,166
Madge.
161
00:07:11,334 --> 00:07:13,550
We should've been doing this
a long time ago.
162
00:07:17,463 --> 00:07:20,096
Would you please do me a solid
163
00:07:21,269 --> 00:07:23,969
and get Darryl Philbin
on the speakerphone.
164
00:07:29,686 --> 00:07:31,561
Hi, Darryl.
Come out here, please.
165
00:07:32,853 --> 00:07:33,688
I'm good.
166
00:07:33,856 --> 00:07:35,284
{\You need to s}Stop being so shy.
167
00:07:35,409 --> 00:07:38,276
Come out here and embrace
who you really are, superstar.
168
00:07:38,444 --> 00:07:40,790
- This is embarrassing.
- I bet it is.
169
00:07:41,239 --> 00:07:42,944
If you're gonna do your job well{\ here},
170
00:07:43,069 --> 00:07:44,741
{\you gotta }get used to being embarrassed.
171
00:07:44,909 --> 00:07:46,618
Let me put my shoes on.
172
00:07:49,581 --> 00:07:51,122
Hit the speakerphone button.
173
00:07:51,874 --> 00:07:53,431
The speakerphone button?
174
00:07:53,960 --> 00:07:55,460
Same button as you hit before.
175
00:07:57,338 --> 00:07:58,338
Or sit on it.
176
00:07:58,809 --> 00:08:00,507
This whole delivery/sales idea,
177
00:08:01,077 --> 00:08:02,632
you know whose that was?
178
00:08:02,757 --> 00:08:03,927
{\That was }Darryl Philbin's.
179
00:08:04,095 --> 00:08:07,889
He thought of that
way before the corporate fat suits.
180
00:08:08,057 --> 00:08:09,015
{\So w}What happened?
181
00:08:09,183 --> 00:08:11,161
I got in the way.
I said no.
182
00:08:12,245 --> 00:08:13,745
And it just stopped.
183
00:08:14,512 --> 00:08:15,418
But then,
184
00:08:15,543 --> 00:08:18,167
corporate comes up with this idea.
But you know what?
185
00:08:18,292 --> 00:08:19,526
They need to know
186
00:08:19,694 --> 00:08:20,986
that it was yours.
187
00:08:21,111 --> 00:08:22,847
{\And }I don't care if I take a bullet,
188
00:08:22,972 --> 00:08:26,408
we're going to call them,
{\We're going to }put them on speakerphone right now,
189
00:08:26,576 --> 00:08:29,126
and we are going
to straighten this out.
190
00:08:29,787 --> 00:08:32,494
Screw corporate.
They probably stole the idea anyway.
191
00:08:33,696 --> 00:08:36,459
Corporate stole nothing.
Darryl brought this idea to me,
192
00:08:36,627 --> 00:08:39,004
{\And }then I told them,
giving Darryl full credit.
193
00:08:39,298 --> 00:08:41,089
So no need to "screw corporate."
194
00:08:41,257 --> 00:08:44,086
{\Everyone, l}Let's give Darryl a round of applause
as planned.
195
00:08:49,585 --> 00:08:51,410
I'm a little peeved at Darryl{\ right now}.
196
00:08:51,684 --> 00:08:53,642
- He went to Gabe behind your back.
- He didn't go
197
00:08:53,812 --> 00:08:55,477
behind my back, {\he went }but over my head.
198
00:08:55,647 --> 00:08:58,063
He went over your head
to go behind your back.
199
00:08:58,670 --> 00:09:00,649
What's taking someone from behind?
200
00:09:00,819 --> 00:09:02,325
No, listen.
This cannot stand.
201
00:09:02,450 --> 00:09:04,167
{\We can't have w}Workers can't go
straight to corporate.
202
00:09:04,292 --> 00:09:07,015
- It makes your job superfluous.
- It was a good idea, though.
203
00:09:07,296 --> 00:09:08,558
Here's another{\ good idea} one.
204
00:09:08,683 --> 00:09:10,533
Corporate chain of command.
205
00:09:11,848 --> 00:09:14,370
We need to strangle Darryl's idea.
206
00:09:18,074 --> 00:09:20,712
I'm really sorry,
but we can't come to your party{\ tonight}.
207
00:09:20,880 --> 00:09:22,963
I was looking forward
to throwing some darts with you{\ guys}.
208
00:09:23,133 --> 00:09:25,307
Well, then,{\ I mean,} maybe we could do it...
209
00:09:26,238 --> 00:09:27,761
like next Halloween.
210
00:09:27,929 --> 00:09:30,512
- For sure.
- We're{\ just, like,} totally caught in the middle{\ here}.
211
00:09:30,975 --> 00:09:31,805
What{\ are you talking about}?
212
00:09:32,155 --> 00:09:34,851
Well, Jim and Pam
basically begged us not to go.
213
00:09:35,019 --> 00:09:36,853
{\Jim and Pam }They really don't want you to go?
214
00:09:37,179 --> 00:09:40,315
They're really upset
about the whole Danny situation.
215
00:09:40,649 --> 00:09:41,815
I'll talk to them.
216
00:09:41,985 --> 00:09:45,153
But just don't tell them
that we said anything to you.
217
00:09:46,656 --> 00:09:47,906
Or you're dead.
218
00:09:53,529 --> 00:09:54,411
Kelly.
219
00:09:54,581 --> 00:09:55,580
Great costume.
220
00:09:57,506 --> 00:10:00,235
You cannot change costumes
in the middle of the day!
221
00:10:00,360 --> 00:10:01,420
Pam, she's out.
222
00:10:01,982 --> 00:10:02,836
If I'm out,
223
00:10:03,006 --> 00:10:05,382
I'm gonna sue this entire company
for discrimination!
224
00:10:05,550 --> 00:10:08,011
Guys, you're arguing
over a 1 in 16 chance.
225
00:10:08,136 --> 00:10:10,637
Over a prize worth 40 bucks.
226
00:10:10,805 --> 00:10:12,154
15,000 bucks, Oscar.
227
00:10:12,279 --> 00:10:13,588
Yeah, shut it, Oscar.
228
00:10:13,975 --> 00:10:15,428
This is an amazing prize.
229
00:10:15,553 --> 00:10:17,567
{\I mean, }I don't want to give Pam
a compliment
230
00:10:17,692 --> 00:10:19,120
'cause she's so blech.
231
00:10:19,245 --> 00:10:20,895
But she did a good job.
232
00:10:21,207 --> 00:10:22,482
I{\ really} want that coupon book.
233
00:10:22,837 --> 00:10:23,900
Garbage magnet.
234
00:10:24,068 --> 00:10:25,618
Garbage magnet.
God.
235
00:10:26,190 --> 00:10:29,668
Magnets are interesting enough.
No need to tart 'em up with{\ some} design.
236
00:10:30,700 --> 00:10:32,806
I can't believe
this doesn't make you mad.
237
00:10:33,708 --> 00:10:35,245
What {\the hell }are they talking about?
238
00:10:36,006 --> 00:10:36,997
Kevin and Gabe.
239
00:10:37,279 --> 00:10:39,541
Probably about the extremes of
the human physique.
240
00:10:39,709 --> 00:10:41,209
{\Do you think }Kevin is going over my head?
241
00:10:41,377 --> 00:10:42,794
I don't... My God.
242
00:10:42,962 --> 00:10:45,462
Okay, all right!
You know what?
243
00:10:46,074 --> 00:10:47,726
That's inappropriate, Kevin.
244
00:10:47,851 --> 00:10:50,321
I am your boss,
and if you have something to say,
245
00:10:50,446 --> 00:10:52,971
it goes through me,
and then I take it to Gabe.
246
00:10:53,139 --> 00:10:54,505
Chain of command,{\ do you} understand?
247
00:10:54,630 --> 00:10:56,391
- I'm so sorry.
- You're sorry?
248
00:10:56,559 --> 00:10:58,310
- I just thought...
- What{\ did you just thought}?
249
00:10:58,692 --> 00:11:01,830
Well, Gabe asked me
if there were any really cool
250
00:11:01,955 --> 00:11:04,983
Lady Gaga moves that
he could do for the catwalk,
251
00:11:05,553 --> 00:11:06,968
and so then I told...
252
00:11:07,362 --> 00:11:08,193
Alright.
253
00:11:08,363 --> 00:11:10,721
I told him that there
was this one cool move
254
00:11:10,846 --> 00:11:13,199
where she powers down like a robot.
255
00:11:14,255 --> 00:11:17,299
But I'm so sorry
that I didn't tell you first.
256
00:11:17,424 --> 00:11:19,582
Well, don't let it happen again.
257
00:11:19,707 --> 00:11:22,143
You think that
I would let this happen again?
258
00:11:22,268 --> 00:11:24,169
No way, Jose!
259
00:11:27,895 --> 00:11:29,145
F*** you, Gabe.
260
00:11:30,593 --> 00:11:32,010
Can you imagine?
261
00:11:32,363 --> 00:11:34,137
- It's just crazy.
- That is crazy.
262
00:11:34,305 --> 00:11:36,765
We would never care
if Andy or Kevin went to your party.
263
00:11:36,933 --> 00:11:38,807
{\Look, }I'm just glad we can laugh about it,
264
00:11:38,977 --> 00:11:42,771
because I was a little nervous
about coming to work {\here }with{\, you know,} our history.
265
00:11:42,939 --> 00:11:45,243
{\My gosh, }Everyone keeps blowing that
out of proportion.
266
00:11:45,368 --> 00:11:47,484
- It's not even a history.
- Exactly.
267
00:11:47,652 --> 00:11:50,278
It's not like you guys
had some long relationship, right?
268
00:11:50,949 --> 00:11:52,975
{\Big, }Painful breakup I don't know about?
269
00:11:53,449 --> 00:11:54,823
- Two or three dates.
- {\It was }Two.
270
00:11:55,092 --> 00:11:57,773
- Was it two? I thought it was three.
- No, we...
271
00:11:58,080 --> 00:11:59,507
We had plans for a third,
272
00:11:59,632 --> 00:12:01,490
but{\ then, I don't know,} you never called me back{\, so}...
273
00:12:02,123 --> 00:12:03,625
You can't handle the truth.
274
00:12:04,624 --> 00:12:06,169
{\Well, }That does not sound like me.
275
00:12:06,337 --> 00:12:08,840
Yeah. It was, though.
That's what happened.
276
00:12:12,414 --> 00:12:14,843
Great, I just wanted
to make sure things weren't weird.
277
00:12:18,766 --> 00:12:20,954
Okay, this whole
"going over my head gate"
278
00:12:21,474 --> 00:12:24,269
is making people act weird.
Chain of command is crumbling.
279
00:12:24,439 --> 00:12:26,439
Do you know what {\just }happened?
I {\just }made Kevin cry.
280
00:12:26,764 --> 00:12:28,437
And Gabe looks like Lady Gaga.
281
00:12:28,562 --> 00:12:29,985
That's not Halloween.
282
00:12:30,243 --> 00:12:31,921
Halloween should be a day
283
00:12:32,046 --> 00:12:34,656
in which we honor monsters
and not be mad at each other.
284
00:12:34,824 --> 00:12:36,741
I'm not mad.
Are you mad?
285
00:12:36,909 --> 00:12:38,990
You went over my head,
and then you lied to my face,
286
00:12:39,115 --> 00:12:41,705
so my head and my face
have taken a beating.
287
00:12:41,873 --> 00:12:44,541
Well, I'm sorry
if it seems that way to you.
288
00:12:44,709 --> 00:12:47,765
That might help, if you said{\"I'm sorry"} that
in front of everybody...
289
00:12:47,890 --> 00:12:48,877
In front of me.
290
00:12:49,210 --> 00:12:50,505
You made a bad call.
291
00:12:50,982 --> 00:12:52,232
And I fixed it.
292
00:12:52,592 --> 00:12:54,075
So I'm not apologizing.
293
00:12:54,200 --> 00:12:55,736
So that's it?
294
00:12:56,262 --> 00:12:57,886
- That's it.
- Is it?
295
00:13:02,896 --> 00:13:03,746
Sookie.
296
00:13:06,539 --> 00:13:08,264
Bill Compton from True Blood.
297
00:13:08,389 --> 00:13:11,693
How many freakin' vampires
am I supposed to care about these days?
298
00:13:11,861 --> 00:13:13,820
I guess you could say
I'm still in costume.
299
00:13:13,988 --> 00:13:16,392
I'm a rational consumer.
300
00:13:20,687 --> 00:13:22,287
Stupid coupon booklet.
301
00:13:23,481 --> 00:13:25,790
You see my costume?
I'm a rational consumer.
302
00:13:25,958 --> 00:13:28,126
I heard you say it to Phyllis.
That's a good line.
303
00:13:28,294 --> 00:13:30,612
Everybody.
After you walk the runway,
304
00:13:30,737 --> 00:13:33,160
everyone has to vote
for who gets the coupon book,
305
00:13:33,285 --> 00:13:35,008
and you can't vote for yourself.
306
00:13:35,176 --> 00:13:37,344
Pam, can you vote for other people?
307
00:13:37,512 --> 00:13:39,928
Got to get in on this.
Hey, it's cool, man.
308
00:13:40,098 --> 00:13:43,137
I work in the warehouse.
I'm cool!
309
00:13:43,545 --> 00:13:45,518
I'm hip and I'm jive,
310
00:13:45,686 --> 00:13:47,936
but I don't care about nobody!
311
00:13:48,106 --> 00:13:49,689
Do you know who I am?
312
00:13:49,857 --> 00:13:51,962
Happy Halloween, jerk!
313
00:13:54,602 --> 00:13:57,245
Still don't know who I am?
I'll give you a hint.
314
00:13:57,925 --> 00:13:59,574
I go over other people's heads.
315
00:13:59,742 --> 00:14:02,410
- Michael, this is a bad idea.
- What's a bad idea?
316
00:14:02,578 --> 00:14:05,538
Dressing up as somebody...
{\I mean, }When has that ever worked for you?
317
00:14:05,706 --> 00:14:06,664
Never!
318
00:14:08,459 --> 00:14:10,531
You know what? Fine.
I'm not Darryl.
319
00:14:10,813 --> 00:14:12,128
And thank God I'm not{\ Darryl}.
320
00:14:12,296 --> 00:14:14,166
Could you for once
{\just }let us enjoy a party
321
00:14:14,291 --> 00:14:16,215
instead of making it
about all your issues?
322
00:14:18,137 --> 00:14:20,605
Get a jolt from my electrode
323
00:14:20,730 --> 00:14:21,929
They did the mash
324
00:14:22,099 --> 00:14:23,765
They did the monster mash
325
00:14:24,109 --> 00:14:25,409
The monster mash
326
00:14:26,502 --> 00:14:27,643
He's a warrior.
327
00:14:27,813 --> 00:14:28,942
They did the mash
328
00:14:32,454 --> 00:14:34,075
They did the monster mash
329
00:14:34,200 --> 00:14:37,391
I present to you
the "rational consumer."
330
00:14:38,338 --> 00:14:39,739
As it were.
331
00:14:43,530 --> 00:14:46,419
Igor on chains
backed by his baying hounds
332
00:14:47,166 --> 00:14:49,055
Slow.
Nice and slow, honey.
333
00:14:49,180 --> 00:14:51,250
- Angela as a nurse.
- Slow it down.
334
00:14:51,420 --> 00:14:53,211
- There it is.
- I don't like your tone.
335
00:14:53,819 --> 00:14:56,919
They were sold out
of all the other costumes, okay?
336
00:14:58,206 --> 00:15:00,211
Think we all live
in the real world here.
337
00:15:00,336 --> 00:15:03,888
Let's not pretend to be unaware
of what sells in this office.
338
00:15:04,056 --> 00:15:06,348
- What should we ask?
- Can I play?
339
00:15:06,748 --> 00:15:09,256
Why don't you ask if Darryl
340
00:15:09,381 --> 00:15:11,771
is a bad friend
who backstabs people in the back?
341
00:15:12,326 --> 00:15:15,191
{\We have }Only one question {\to ask }for the spirit world,
and you want us to ask that?
342
00:15:15,749 --> 00:15:16,859
He says no.
343
00:15:17,029 --> 00:15:18,736
Darryl moved it.
You moved it.
344
00:15:18,906 --> 00:15:19,904
No.
345
00:15:20,324 --> 00:15:22,384
Dwight,
you saw Darryl move it, right?
346
00:15:22,885 --> 00:15:26,444
Let's just say I saw exactly
what the two of you wanted me to see.
347
00:15:26,569 --> 00:15:28,335
I know how to sit on a fence.
348
00:15:28,774 --> 00:15:31,011
Hell, I can even sleep on a fence.
349
00:15:31,381 --> 00:15:34,752
The trick is to do it face down
with the post in your mouth.
350
00:15:34,922 --> 00:15:37,026
If you had one word
{\you would use }to describe Darryl,
351
00:15:37,151 --> 00:15:38,881
what would that word be?
352
00:15:40,526 --> 00:15:41,592
"A"...
353
00:15:42,958 --> 00:15:43,958
"S"...
354
00:15:44,685 --> 00:15:45,555
"S"...
355
00:15:49,061 --> 00:15:50,149
"H"... No.
356
00:15:52,021 --> 00:15:53,021
"E"...
357
00:15:53,930 --> 00:15:54,730
"T".
358
00:15:54,900 --> 00:15:55,731
An asset.
359
00:15:59,862 --> 00:16:00,973
That's enough.
360
00:16:01,098 --> 00:16:02,403
{\EARS HEARTS}
361
00:16:05,244 --> 00:16:07,003
{\I don't think }It's not gonna work out
the way you think.
362
00:16:07,128 --> 00:16:08,870
I don't think you get it.
363
00:16:12,960 --> 00:16:13,958
{\This is some }What a party.
364
00:16:14,128 --> 00:16:16,415
When you work hard,
you play hard around here.
365
00:16:16,540 --> 00:16:18,440
Even if you don't work hard.
366
00:16:21,022 --> 00:16:22,341
Here's something.
367
00:16:22,970 --> 00:16:25,720
Why didn't you ever call Pam back?
368
00:16:26,262 --> 00:16:28,506
- Are you serious?
- Yeah.
369
00:16:29,033 --> 00:16:31,103
{\I mean, }I'm not saying everybody
has to fall in love{\ or anything}.
370
00:16:31,228 --> 00:16:34,103
I'm just saying{\, but}
to{\, you know,} not even call her back is...
371
00:16:34,273 --> 00:16:36,363
Know what it was?
{\I think }She gave me her number,
372
00:16:36,488 --> 00:16:38,608
but {\then, like,}her fours looked like eights...
373
00:16:38,776 --> 00:16:39,636
Could be.
374
00:16:39,761 --> 00:16:43,070
But you also called her the second time,
so you had the number right.
375
00:16:43,240 --> 00:16:46,782
Halpert, you looking
for someone to bang your wife?
376
00:16:46,952 --> 00:16:47,950
Nope.
377
00:16:49,696 --> 00:16:50,745
You want to know?
378
00:16:52,346 --> 00:16:55,625
I didn't call her back because she spent
the whole date talking about you.
379
00:16:56,236 --> 00:16:58,264
She was obviously in love with you.
380
00:17:01,258 --> 00:17:04,342
- 57, 58.
- Wait, she hasn't moved in a while.
381
00:17:04,879 --> 00:17:05,690
Erin!
382
00:17:05,815 --> 00:17:08,930
Two. I got two.
I ate two whole apples.
383
00:17:13,102 --> 00:17:15,886
I'd remember talking about Jim.
That wasn't it.
384
00:17:16,011 --> 00:17:17,638
Just tell her the real reason.
385
00:17:18,984 --> 00:17:22,401
You {\honestly }wanna know why I didn't call her
back on a date over four years ago?
386
00:17:23,026 --> 00:17:25,571
- She had a nice time. It seems rude.
- I did.
387
00:17:25,741 --> 00:17:28,282
And it's one of those things
that's {\just}gonna keep gnawing at me.
388
00:17:28,643 --> 00:17:31,536
Like gnaw, gnaw.
"Why didn't he? I have no idea why."
389
00:17:31,704 --> 00:17:35,708
Honestly, I didn't call you back
cause I thought you seemed a little...
390
00:17:36,978 --> 00:17:38,167
dorky.
391
00:17:41,426 --> 00:17:44,271
Thank you.
I got it.
392
00:17:45,229 --> 00:17:48,344
Now I know.
You thought I was a little dorky.
393
00:17:49,473 --> 00:17:50,680
You know?
394
00:17:54,167 --> 00:17:57,479
Well, excuse me.
395
00:17:59,546 --> 00:18:02,984
In the future, you need
{\to get }Michael's approval {\on anything }before coming to me.
396
00:18:03,152 --> 00:18:04,023
Thank you.
397
00:18:04,148 --> 00:18:05,945
You're gonna miss out
on some good ideas.
398
00:18:06,569 --> 00:18:08,708
Obviously,
if it's a really good idea,
399
00:18:08,833 --> 00:18:10,116
then my door is open.
400
00:18:10,284 --> 00:18:12,618
If they're good ideas,
I'm not gonna say no.
401
00:18:12,743 --> 00:18:14,551
- You said no to this one.
- That's...
402
00:18:14,676 --> 00:18:17,905
I make one mistake in 15 years
and you drag me over the coals.
403
00:18:18,084 --> 00:18:20,209
- After everything I did for you?
- What{\ have you done for me}?
404
00:18:20,874 --> 00:18:23,674
What have you done?
Ed truck hired me.
405
00:18:24,393 --> 00:18:25,464
Jo promoted me.
406
00:18:25,969 --> 00:18:27,341
Gabe listened to me.
407
00:18:27,511 --> 00:18:29,719
All you've ever done
was say no to me.
408
00:18:31,997 --> 00:18:33,297
I have ambition.
409
00:18:34,191 --> 00:18:36,413
And you kept me
at the same level for years.
410
00:18:37,521 --> 00:18:39,119
Dropping bombs, right?
411
00:18:40,482 --> 00:18:43,982
- Must really make you think, Michael.
- Stop it. We're thinking.
412
00:18:45,383 --> 00:18:46,774
We're thinking about it.
413
00:18:46,899 --> 00:18:49,148
{\You don't have to}Don't point to the fact
that we're thinking about it.
414
00:18:49,273 --> 00:18:50,865
Stop it.
Just let us think.
415
00:18:53,722 --> 00:18:55,954
Next time you have
a really great idea,
416
00:18:56,079 --> 00:18:57,623
we will put it in a hat,
417
00:18:58,819 --> 00:19:00,791
and then{\ we will have }
Erin will pick it out of the hat
418
00:19:00,961 --> 00:19:03,169
- and let her decide.
- I don't understand {\the point of}about the hat.
419
00:19:03,988 --> 00:19:07,381
- You're right. We don't need a hat.
- I am not budging on the hat issue.
420
00:19:07,843 --> 00:19:09,425
We're gonna table the hat question.
421
00:19:09,595 --> 00:19:11,385
The best ideas are gonna come to me.
422
00:19:11,555 --> 00:19:13,763
I make the final decision.
Period.
423
00:19:15,273 --> 00:19:18,017
We both reserve the right to go to Jo
if we disagree with Gabe.
424
00:19:19,022 --> 00:19:20,046
Fair enough.
425
00:19:20,171 --> 00:19:21,574
Why don't we simplify this?
426
00:19:21,699 --> 00:19:24,721
Darryl brings it to Michael.
Michael brings it to me.
427
00:19:24,846 --> 00:19:26,108
No one calls Jo.
428
00:19:27,578 --> 00:19:29,370
Unless {\you and I }we decide
we want to talk to Jo,
429
00:19:29,495 --> 00:19:31,008
then we'll give her a call.
430
00:19:31,297 --> 00:19:32,097
Cool.
431
00:19:32,868 --> 00:19:36,583
- I'm sorry I lied to you.
- I'm sorry. I was a jerk.
432
00:19:38,217 --> 00:19:39,417
Friends fight.
433
00:19:40,616 --> 00:19:41,833
Friends fight.
434
00:19:42,001 --> 00:19:42,833
What's up{\, man}?
435
00:19:43,574 --> 00:19:46,504
Sometimes, it seems like
it was better down in the warehouse{\, you know?}.
436
00:19:46,672 --> 00:19:49,784
When I was a freshman in college,
I worked at the student newspaper,
437
00:19:49,909 --> 00:19:52,051
The Cornell daily sun.
This was at Cornell.
438
00:19:52,350 --> 00:19:55,680
I had to write an op-ed column
everyday: Bernard's regards.
439
00:19:56,119 --> 00:19:57,556
This was your freshman year?
440
00:19:57,726 --> 00:19:59,433
I started to ask myself,
441
00:19:59,603 --> 00:20:01,102
"do I have big plans here?"
442
00:20:01,270 --> 00:20:03,757
I didn't want to become editor
of that paper, so...
443
00:20:04,146 --> 00:20:06,649
I got up and walked right out
of Walter Bernard hall.
444
00:20:06,819 --> 00:20:09,110
And that's actually when I heard
445
00:20:09,278 --> 00:20:11,936
eight male voices singing,
446
00:20:13,078 --> 00:20:14,978
unencumbered by instruments.
447
00:20:15,903 --> 00:20:17,576
I was hooked. So,
448
00:20:17,746 --> 00:20:21,192
is becoming CEO of this company
449
00:20:23,520 --> 00:20:25,000
your a cappella group?
450
00:20:26,255 --> 00:20:28,441
Come on. We're going to Danny's bar.
Public school.
451
00:20:28,566 --> 00:20:30,297
No, I got some work to do.
452
00:20:30,769 --> 00:20:33,069
I do have big plans at this company.
453
00:20:38,362 --> 00:20:40,891
To be honest, I still can't believe
he didn't call her back.
454
00:20:42,184 --> 00:20:44,430
Who doesn't call
a dork like that back?
455
00:20:49,153 --> 00:20:51,902
Spinach in a can.
Powerful spinach.
456
00:20:53,397 --> 00:20:54,488
My hero.
457
00:20:59,602 --> 00:21:01,323
Everyone, I've tallied the votes.
458
00:21:01,648 --> 00:21:02,706
And the winner
459
00:21:02,874 --> 00:21:05,230
of the costume celebration
spectacular
460
00:21:05,835 --> 00:21:08,585
and the Scranton/Wilkes-barre
coupon book, Oscar Martinez.
461
00:21:14,190 --> 00:21:15,632
If I have to vote for someone
462
00:21:15,757 --> 00:21:18,013
I don't want it
to be someone who can beat me.
463
00:21:18,986 --> 00:21:21,370
Shake things up.
I'm an inner guy.
464
00:21:22,713 --> 00:21:26,629
Best Edward James Olmos costume
I've ever seen.
465
00:21:27,894 --> 00:21:29,024
Like freaky good.