Got it.
Let's go in. I'm freezing.
People, wait. Come back. One fun one.
- We're gonna do a fun one. - One Charlie's angels.
One. Let's go.
This is just a Christmas card from your paper supplier.
No one's putting this on their fridge.
I got it, how about this...
What if all the boys are on one side, all the girls are on the other.
The boys are, like, "why, I oughta,"
and the girls are, like, "let's go shopping"?
- Let's just jump in t air. - That's it! That's a picture! Yes!
We're gonna jump in the air.
- Here we go. - OK, one...
Two...
Three...
Not everyone jumped.
Everybody jump in the air this time.
Here we go.
- Still some people not jumping. - You kidding me. Who isn't jumping?
I'll tell you who. Darryl, Phyllis,
Stanley, Angela, and Oscar.
- I am jumping. - You are? Let me see you jump.
This is a store-bought camera. Not a special military-grade cameras
- that would be able to capture that. - I'm freezing.
Also, Erin is jumping way too early. She's on the ground by "three."
- I didn't want to miss it. - Well, if we all jump really high,
we'll be in the air longer.
Here's a question nobody's asking. Is this worth it?
Don't answer that. Listen up and listen good.
We need to just get one picture
where we're all in the air at the same time.
I believe in us. We can do this.
On three, everyone in the air.
We didn't get it.
I'm the Office Administrator now,
which means I'm basically being paid to be head
of the party planning committee.
The first thing I did as head...
I shut it down.
At its worst it was a toxic political club
used to make others feel miserable and left out.
At its best it planned parties.
It hardly looks fake. It's so lush.
Why does it smell real?
Good one.
Merry Christmas, little children!
How's everybody doing today?
Good.
- How's the party coming along? - Great.
Are we over budget?
Good.
Did anyone get drunk already?
Not yet.
Good for you. Angela,
lay it on me, what's the problem?
Nothing. Should be fun.
So, Stanley, how big is the bug up your butt today?
Pam got those sugar-free cookies I like. I'm doing fine.
All right, well, I will be in my office
making toys for the good children.
What you got?
It's all good, Santa.
That's a relief.
Santa's gonna take some much-needed free time.
All right. Good!
My kids are growing up. As a boss,
I look at that and I say great.
It is exactly what a boss would hope
would happen because that's what I want.
That's what every boss wants,
Is a wonderful Christmas with no drama.
It's present time, you guys.
Happy holidays
from your friends at Sabre.
We just want to say how grateful we are.
Sabre is looking for ways to involve me
as minority executive trainee.
I suggested choosing
the annual Christmas gift to the employees.
And they said, "Yes. Perfect. Thank you, Kelly.
"Finally, something for you to do."
It's a Hello Kitty laptop sleeve.
- Hello Kitty's for girls. - Nashua got mp3 players.
Yeah, I don't even have a laptop.
I wonder if these presents would be under as much scrutiny if I were white.
I said "I wonder." I didn't say "I think."
Kelly, I thought we agreed on fleece blankets.
Blankets? What am I, five?
Erin and I make great use of ours.
Yes, Erin and I are still dating.
Why do you ask me so often if we're still dating?
I'll take one of those pink pouches.
I feel good today.
My little girl Jada?
It's my turn to have her for Christmas this year.
Two years ago I had her, and we had the best time.
I Tivoed her favorite shows, some things I've never heard of.
Icarly...
You know who's funny on that show?
The friend with the video camera.
He's got a nice way of talking.
It's snowing.
It's the first snowfall of Christmas.
Is that just so magical for you, little girl?
Can you not wait to have a hot chocolate,
and cuddle up with papa and tell him about all your Christmas dreams, hmm?
It's not even a real snow. Look, it's a dusting.
Pitiful.
Damn it, Jim, you cannot throw snowballs in here!
It's not a snowball, 'cause it's only a dusting.
Right?
Look at that. There's a pebble in there. You could have killed me!
- Don't be such a baby. - Yeah, who's a little girl now?
You apologize to me right now.
- You've got something on your nose. - You apologize right now.
Very well, then I challenge you to a snowball fight
on the first real snow of winter.
You got it.
That sounds awesome. Can we all do it?
No, it's a snowball fight. It's not fun. Go get your own thing.
Beat it.
Let go.
Are you bringing your new boyfriend to the party?
I wouldn't subject Robert to that. He's a very busy senator.
State senator.
I would not expect you to know
what it's like to date someone in public.
Who are you dating in public?
The senator.
Right.
The state senator.
We went to a picnic thrown my the comptroller's wife.
That would be impressive...
If anyone knew what a comptroller was.
Well...
Do you have any idea how many photographers there are
at a ribbon-cutting ceremony?
I do.
Two.
"Angela... over here, Angela... "
"here. Look here!"
Before we kick off the party, I just want to remind everyone
that an office party is just that...
A party.
It's not an excuse to get really drunk
or confront someone
a cathartic experience of any kind.
There are questions to that.
You know what, no questions.
Last item on the agenda,
Toby would like to make an announcement.
I just wanted to let you know
I'll be taking a leave of absence starting next week.
'Cause you've been on the lam?
{\*Because the "boring police" have been after you, and they finally caught up with you?}'Cause "boring police" finally caught with you?
No, the opposite. I was actually selected to be a juror
on a very high-profile case.
Yes, the case
of the horrible red-headed sad sack.
And the verdict:
It was Toby. And the sentence, death.
Death to Toby!
That's hurtful talk. We've talked about it.
I don't interrupt your announcements.
You leave these huge pauses in your sentences.
- What do you expect me to do? - What's the case, Toby?
I can't talk about it, but it's a very high-profile case.
Is it criminal?
- Have we heard of it? - I don't know.
Is it the teacher who tried to turn her exchange student into a sex slave?
Was it the post office guy who rubbed his penis all over the mail?
Guys, it's a really big deal.
- He's rubbing his neck. - He's rubbing his neck!
Scranton strangler!
I can neither confirm nor deny this.
Let's just say I'll be up to my neck in jury duty.
That was the worst joke ever.
Corporate will be sending someone else to take my place.
Holly flax-she comes from the Nashua branch.
- What? - Yeah, she'll be starting next week.
If you have any questions about the transition, just let me know.
- Holly's coming back here? - Yeah.
- Guys, who's Holly? - That is a great question, Erin.
How do you describe somebody who is at the same time
an old friend,
and was a lover...
And was a complicated part of my past,
and maybe, just maybe a part of my future?
She's one sassy black lady.
Holly's coming back, everybody, and we have to have a party.
I'm not sure the temporary replacement of an HR rep really warrants a party.
You know what, we'll postpone this party until then.
This is too important. Cancel this one.
Dwight, get rid of the tree.
Cancel. We're canceling it.
- Don't throw them out! - We have to cancel...
- We can save that. - We're gonna get fresh for holly.
- I bought these. - These cookies are fine!
They're not. Fresh and new.
We don't have the budget for another party.
Then, everybody will chip in. It'll be fine.
I honestly think you're idealizing people here again.
- I don't think that's gonna happen. - I'll pay for the party.
This is way too important.
People, Holly's coming back,
and this is the most important Christmas party of my life.
So back to work.
Man, I worked hard. I worked so hard for this!
I was after corporate constantly. I emailed Joe.
I wrote letters.
And you know who I end up owing this to is the Scranton strangler.
Thank you. Thank you, Scranton strangler.
I love you!
You just took one more person's breath away.
We have always had good Christmas parties here,
as you know, but they've never been cool.
The name is Bond... Santa Bond.
I'll have an eggnog, shaken, not stirred.
Classic Brosnan.
Santa. Wonderful tradition. Everybody loves Santa.
Everybody can't get enough of the jolly old man.
But that is a myth, because you know what,
he's not necessarily a big fat guy with a beard.
He's not necessarily an old guy.
No one knows what the real Santa...
God!
Stop moving your calves so much while you're talking.
This year's gonna be different. It's not gonna be tacky.
You know what, the food
is going to be austere.
It is not going to be tacky, deli platter food.
It's not gonna have a big, fat, gross Santa Claus.
It's gonna be a cool, sleek Santa.
I'll bring my boyfriend.
- I'll invite him. - Sure.
Unless there's a chance there could be press at this party.
You never know.
I only ask because he's a senator.
- He'd help us with parking tickets? - I don't think that's appropriate.
- Then he's not a senator. - Yes, he is.
We doing the gifts today?
It is the Christmas party.
Well, the classy Christmas party.
But don't get too excited, I didn't have much time.
Me neither.
I've been working forever on Jim's present.
He always gives me the best Christmas gifts.
He'll take a memory or a private joke,
and he'll create something totally unique.
I love them.
So this year I made him something.
A comic book.
It stars Jimmy Halpert, a mild-mannered paper salesman
who, while riding bike in the forest, is bitten by a radioactive bear.
Becomes a "bear man". Wreaks havoc on the office.
It's really good.
No! Fake tree.
- No, it has the little... - Pam, no.
Holly's coming from New Hampshire.
Somebody from there looks at that and thinks it's a burning cross.
I want you to go and get a real tree.
Take some money. Thank you.
I'm looking for Michael Scott.
That's me. Come on in.
There's nothing classier than boring jazz music,
I'm here to tell ya.
I made a bit of a judgment call.
I hired one musician, because I thought, what's better,
to hire an entire quartet for half an hour,
or one bassist for the entire day?
Hey, any volunteers to come with me
to go buy a Christmas tree?
I would, but I don't want to get dirty.
There might be girls at the party.
Why do you think that girls are gonna be here?
No one invited girls. It's just us.
I will help.
Although my brid... My hybrid...
My Prius hybrid, won't fit a tree.
Which is ironic, considering how many trees it saves
on a daily basis.
I do, however, have a hookup
with a dude who has a pickup.
Do you mean Darryl? Great idea.
- You know him? - Yeah.
He works here. We all know him.
I should come along, 'cause he's my... He's my hookup.
Cool.
Come on, now, Justine, look...
Look, I've been planning this, okay?
- You cannot do this. - I'm not doing it!
She told me she wants to have Christmas here.
- She did? - Yes.
She wants to be around family for Christmas.
I don't know.
I thought I was enough family for my daughter.
Don't come in, I'm busy.
It's cool, I'm here too.
Sorry, I didn't want to come in.
We have to go buy a new tree, and we'd like to borrow your truck.
Come on, it'll be fun.
We could do doughnuts in the snow.
No. Thank you for your interest in my truck.
Sorry. We'll leave you alone.
I could use a breath of fresh air.
Let's do it.
When Holly gets here,
I want you to be helpful to her.
There's nothing about her online.
No impression on the Internet.
She doesn't need an Internet presence. You just know.
What are you doing here? You must be in the courthouse.
We're on recess. I came for the party.
- Hey, everyone. - Hi, Toby.
What does the strangler look like? Is he gorgeous?
He looks gorgeous in the drawings.
That scowl.
I can't talk about it or I'll get removed from the jury.
Then he'll come back here and replace Holly,
so stop asking him questions.
I know people are only this excited to talk to me because of the trial.
But they talk to me for a while,
and maybe people realize I have something to say.
And then one day,
we're just talking.
You've reached the voice mail of Dwight Kurt Schrute.
Stop!
I have no feeling in my fingers or penis.
But I think it was worth it.
I was laying on the ground, defenseless,
and he just kept throwing 'em
until he exhausted himself.
And... then...
"How about icing it? lol. Dwight."
- Hi. - Hello.
Is there any way I can get a hand with these, please?
I'm sorry, I can't help you. I'm waiting for my boss' pretty friend.
There she is.
Hey.
Erin, would you help her, for God's sake?
Oh, you're Holly! Of course.
Sorry.
Hello.
Well, well, well...
If it isn't Michael Scott. You old bastard.
I never thought I'd see your face
around these parts, you old bastard!
I did show my face around these parts, you old bastard.
Why, you're some sorta wise guy, huh?
I most certainly am.
Homey!
Holly's back.
Huggy monster!
Not the huggy monster! I don't wanna die!
Well, everybody, you remember Holly.
Did you bring us anything from Nashua?
Yeah. I brought some maple candy.
But I have to admit, I got a little hungry,
and I ate some.
- Adorable. - Would you put those out?
To throw out or put out, like, six pieces for everyone?
It's so nice to be back.
It looks beautiful in here. Super-classy.
Like a party for limousine drivers.
You came on the day of our Christmas party.
It's fabulous. I love what you did!
Isn't it wonderful?
We love it here. Don't you love it?
Let me show you to your desk.
I show you to your dayyy-esk!
Watch out for my guns. They're both loaded.
What kind of guns do you have?
Six-shooter?
This is weird.
I can't believe you're here. It's like you never left.
- Doesn't it? - Yeah, kind of.
And you have a Woody.
- Oh, I love to... - AJ gave me that.
Well, that's understandable. Still raw.
Woody your favorite character?
You know my favorite character in Toy Story? Andy's mom.
Why?
Without her, there's no plot. And without any plot, there's no movie.
That is a really good point.
AJ said he hadn't seen any of the Toy Story movies.
- You're kidding. - I know.
I'm going, "what? Are you serious?"
- What a douche! - Get a life!
Get a... yeah. Good riddance.
We watched them all in one day.
Now he's the biggest Toy Story fanatic ever.
- Good for him. - Next day I found him in my bed.
Really?
That's creepy. How did AJ get in your house?
We live together.
You do?
A little note pinned to him said, "you've got a friend in me."
- Yeah, Randy Newman's the best. - Yeah.
- I love him. - Me too.
Christmas tree, Christmas tree
Won't you be my Christmas tree?
Hey, how about this one?
Seems a little full of itself, right? Kind of a pretty boy.
What if we got a really beat up one, like on Charlie Brown,
and we loved it for what it is?
Maybe.
No, she be talking to your mom or something.
This is my daughter too, Justine!
You seem to think...
Pick a damn tree already.
Listen, it's none of my business,
but if Cece's not with me for Christmas, i'd be really upset too.
I don't have kids or anything,
but if my grandmother ever dies, I'm going to kill myself.
Jada don't want to spend Christmas with me.
She told her mom it wasn't as much fun.
How could she say that?
I took her to the toy store to buy her own presents.
Darryl, no kid wants to buy their own Christmas presents.
Her mom wants me to take her to mass. I guess I'll do that.
No, you should have her mom do the boring Christmas stuff on her time.
You should do the fun parts of Christmas.
How?
Bring her to the party.
Yeah, we'll have Santa,
and we'll play games with her. It'll be fun.
You'll be Mr Christmas by tonight.
The tree's here.
Nobody hug me. I'm covered in tree sap, so...
Why would someone hug you?
Hey there, Jada. Nice to see you again.
I'm Santa Claus. Welcome.
You serious?
It's a sophisticated take.
He doesn't look like Santa Claus.
No, he doesn't.
I told her Santa would be here.
I was told that Holly would be here, single and ready to date.
- And we all got misled. - Who told you that?
Nora Ephron,
in every romantic comedy ever made.
So, is it an open relationship?
God, no.
You're almost 40. Do you not want kids?
I want kids. I really want kids.
But AJ and I are practically engaged.
We talk about spending our lives together.
So where's the ring?
- How are you adjusting to the move? - Nobody cares.
You have to make him commit, or kick his butt to the curb.
You guys, I don't think any of us are really qualified
to be giving holly personal advice about her love life.
Maybe Holly's not in any position to be shooing guys away.
I don't get it.
I'm sorry. I just don't get it.
Listen,
I'm gonna tell him, if he doesn't propose
by the end of this year, we're over.
An ultimatum.
- It doesn't really seem like you. - Great idea. Ultimatums are key.
Nobody does anything for me anymore, unless I threaten to kill myself.
Don't. Stop, Dwight!
Dwight, stop!
Yes, taste my wrath!
- You like that? - Seriously!
Yes, I have a wig for every single person in the office.
You never know when you're gonna need to look like someone.
I just want it to stop.
So cool, right?
There's no connection between the origin story and the quest.
We need to know who Jimmy Halpert was before he was bitten by the bear.
Otherwise it's the bear's quest.
I just sort of meant cute, right?
Did you come here for help, or for me to tell you how great it is?
Help, if it's something simple,
- like add page numbers or laminate it. - You know what you want.
It's also a little derivative of a serial called Bear Man.
- Did you look that up? - No.
There's this female stenographer
at the courthouse who looks like you.
- That's incredible. - No, it's uncanny.
I can't reconnect with you right now.
Hold on one second.
Excuse me.
I guess there are just some people
who you stay together with when you transfer,
and some people you don't. And that's just the way it is.
And I can be mature about that.