1
00:00:05,124 --> 00:00:06,603
I got a delivery for you.
2
00:00:06,912 --> 00:00:08,229
Leave it at reception.
3
00:00:08,606 --> 00:00:11,021
I'm supposed to deliver this one
in person.
4
00:00:44,299 --> 00:00:45,949
Clean up on aisle five.
5
00:00:50,439 --> 00:00:52,739
After three years of writing,
one year of shooting,
6
00:00:52,864 --> 00:00:55,042
four years of reshooting,
and two years of editing,
7
00:00:55,167 --> 00:00:57,253
I have finally completed my movie,
8
00:00:57,720 --> 00:00:59,190
Threat Level Midnight
9
00:01:00,032 --> 00:01:02,450
- Feygnasse Team -
10
00:01:02,618 --> 00:01:03,952
.:: La Fabrique ::.
11
00:01:18,425 --> 00:01:20,390
{\pos(270,155)}7x17 : Threat Level Midnight
12
00:01:21,790 --> 00:01:24,350
- Erin, what are you doing?
- Guys!
13
00:01:24,953 --> 00:01:28,017
{\pos(110,268)}Did you{\* guys} know our{\* own} Michael Scott
has made a movie
14
00:01:28,185 --> 00:01:30,353
and{\* that} he maybe will let us watch it,
15
00:01:30,811 --> 00:01:32,902
{\pos(120,268)}but only if everybody's
dying to see it?
16
00:01:33,027 --> 00:01:35,108
{\pos(120,268)}That's...
{\*Well, d}Don't put words in my mouth.
17
00:01:35,811 --> 00:01:37,238
Threat Level Midnight
18
00:01:37,778 --> 00:01:39,951
{\pos(120,268)}is the great lost film
of Michael Scott.
19
00:01:40,076 --> 00:01:42,477
{\pos(120,268)}We're all in it,
from, like, years and years ago.
20
00:01:42,602 --> 00:01:44,067
{\pos(120,268)}It's like a home movie.
21
00:01:44,192 --> 00:01:47,096
{\pos(120,268)}If Michael Scott
did your home movie.
22
00:01:47,955 --> 00:01:50,792
{\pos(115,258)}Michael screened a work in progress
for us years ago,
23
00:01:50,917 --> 00:01:52,083
and it didn't go well.
24
00:01:52,981 --> 00:01:54,893
We thought it was a comedy.
25
00:01:55,018 --> 00:01:57,568
{\pos(120,268)}Everything pointed to it
being a comedy.
26
00:01:58,466 --> 00:02:01,413
{\pos(110,268)}- We'd love to see it.
- Sweet, I'll go invite Holly.
27
00:02:03,929 --> 00:02:07,807
{\pos(105,268)}Everyone, I know we're{\* really} excited
to see this movie{\* that} everybody's in,
28
00:02:07,975 --> 00:02:10,059
{\pos(120,268)}but we have to remember
that Michael is sensitive.
29
00:02:10,227 --> 00:02:11,811
{\pos(120,268)}So let's stay positive.
30
00:02:12,304 --> 00:02:15,258
{\pos(120,268)}No laughing, no comments,
just positive energy,
31
00:02:15,612 --> 00:02:17,307
{\pos(120,268)}and we'll have a pure fun day.
32
00:02:18,277 --> 00:02:19,299
Thanks, mom.
33
00:02:20,337 --> 00:02:22,487
You never told me you made a movie.
34
00:02:22,612 --> 00:02:24,824
{\pos(110,268)}It's got action. It's got heart.
It's got symbolism.
35
00:02:24,992 --> 00:02:27,118
- It's got you.
- It's got a lot of me.
36
00:02:27,286 --> 00:02:28,435
I can't wait.
37
00:02:30,915 --> 00:02:33,664
Ladies and gentlemen,
Threat Level Midnight.
38
00:02:41,998 --> 00:02:43,198
Michael Scarn?
39
00:02:43,549 --> 00:02:45,799
Well, that is an interesting story.
40
00:02:50,130 --> 00:02:52,850
He was once the best secret agent
in the business.
41
00:02:58,901 --> 00:03:00,350
That was years ago.
42
00:03:04,302 --> 00:03:05,511
Where is he now?
43
00:03:06,188 --> 00:03:09,031
Well, that's also
an interesting story.
44
00:03:17,000 --> 00:03:18,294
Master Scarn.
45
00:03:20,564 --> 00:03:23,395
{\pos(120,268)}I play Samuel,
Michael Scarn's robot butler.
46
00:03:24,038 --> 00:03:25,609
{\pos(120,268)}I wanted Samuel's voice...
47
00:03:25,734 --> 00:03:27,522
{\pos(120,268)}to be like this.
48
00:03:28,345 --> 00:03:31,293
{\pos(120,208)}Michael thought that Samuel
should be a very advanced android,
49
00:03:31,418 --> 00:03:34,017
{\pos(120,208)}almost indistinguishable
from a real person.
50
00:03:35,004 --> 00:03:36,583
{\pos(120,268)}Dwight does not play a robot.
51
00:03:39,015 --> 00:03:39,816
I'm up.
52
00:03:39,984 --> 00:03:42,485
It's the president.
He needs you for a mission.
53
00:03:42,653 --> 00:03:44,028
Tell him I'm retired.
54
00:03:44,196 --> 00:03:45,488
It's Goldenface.
55
00:03:45,656 --> 00:03:46,705
Goldenface.
56
00:03:48,361 --> 00:03:49,867
This makes it personal.
57
00:03:56,093 --> 00:03:58,376
Scarn, you're right on time.
58
00:03:59,852 --> 00:04:02,005
{\pos(120,268)}- Hail to the chief!
- I gave up a lot of weekends
59
00:04:02,173 --> 00:04:03,988
{\pos(120,268)}'cause I thought it'd be good
for my daughter
60
00:04:04,113 --> 00:04:05,710
{\pos(120,268)}to see a black man as president,
61
00:04:05,835 --> 00:04:07,685
{\pos(120,268)}even in a silly home movie.
62
00:04:08,789 --> 00:04:10,516
{\pos(120,268)}What a stupid waste of time.
63
00:04:10,931 --> 00:04:13,099
It's your old enemy, Goldenface.
64
00:04:13,267 --> 00:04:15,226
He's after the NHL all-star game.
65
00:04:15,673 --> 00:04:17,842
He's hidden a bomb
somewhere in the stadium.
66
00:04:20,104 --> 00:04:21,441
This one is personal for me.
67
00:04:21,609 --> 00:04:23,364
{\pos(120,268)}I own the stadium.
68
00:04:23,489 --> 00:04:25,111
{\pos(120,268)}I can't see it blown up.
69
00:04:25,279 --> 00:04:26,613
It's my retirement plan.
70
00:04:26,781 --> 00:04:29,365
- We have to search the stadium.
- Not so fast.
71
00:04:29,533 --> 00:04:32,715
Goldenface has taken
{\*all of }the concession-stand workers hostage.
72
00:04:33,162 --> 00:04:36,009
Scarn, will you find these hostages
73
00:04:36,134 --> 00:04:37,206
and save the game?
74
00:04:37,374 --> 00:04:39,753
Heads I do it, tails I don't.
75
00:04:40,841 --> 00:04:42,129
Best out of seven.
76
00:04:44,870 --> 00:04:45,670
Heads.
77
00:04:49,075 --> 00:04:49,875
Tails.
78
00:04:51,580 --> 00:04:52,472
Heads.
79
00:04:53,569 --> 00:04:54,369
Tails.
80
00:05:08,658 --> 00:05:11,407
Looks like there's gonna be a clean up
on aisle five.
81
00:05:17,525 --> 00:05:19,874
{\pub}Well, the hostages were scared.
82
00:05:20,042 --> 00:05:23,095
Don't you guys get it?
Nobody's coming for us.
83
00:05:23,220 --> 00:05:25,213
Someone's coming, all right.
84
00:05:25,381 --> 00:05:29,092
The only man who would care,
Michael Scarn.
85
00:05:30,731 --> 00:05:33,888
See, I'm gonna lure him here.
Then I'm gonna kill everybody.
86
00:05:34,056 --> 00:05:36,975
Then I'm gonna dig up
Scarn's dead wife,
87
00:05:37,143 --> 00:05:39,291
and I'm gonna hump her real good.
88
00:05:41,024 --> 00:05:42,647
I did not love the dialogue...
89
00:05:43,215 --> 00:05:44,465
or the character.
90
00:05:44,835 --> 00:05:47,280
I took the role
to impress a receptionist
91
00:05:47,405 --> 00:05:49,012
who will remain nameless.
92
00:05:49,780 --> 00:05:52,301
Well, the all-star game
was three days away,
93
00:05:52,426 --> 00:05:54,630
so naturally, it was all sold out.
94
00:05:54,755 --> 00:05:57,716
The only way Scarn was getting in
was in a uniform.
95
00:05:57,841 --> 00:05:59,459
Just one problem with that...
96
00:05:59,584 --> 00:06:02,474
Scarn didn't know a hockey stick
from a slim Jim.
97
00:06:02,599 --> 00:06:04,697
So he went to meet
with the famed trainer,
98
00:06:05,296 --> 00:06:06,316
Cherokee Jack.
99
00:06:06,596 --> 00:06:07,630
Mop the ice.
100
00:06:07,956 --> 00:06:10,842
I'm not here to learn how to mop,
{\*I'm here to learn}but how to play hockey.
101
00:06:11,208 --> 00:06:12,010
Mop it.
102
00:06:27,724 --> 00:06:28,526
Come on.
103
00:06:46,837 --> 00:06:48,036
Now take this.
104
00:06:49,215 --> 00:06:50,965
What am I supposed to do with this?
105
00:06:51,415 --> 00:06:52,216
Mop.
106
00:06:57,890 --> 00:06:59,515
Michael Scarn was quickly becoming
107
00:06:59,683 --> 00:07:02,185
one of the hottest hockey players
in the country.
108
00:07:02,353 --> 00:07:04,497
{\*Each year t}The National Hockey League accepts
109
00:07:05,022 --> 00:07:07,649
one civilian amateur
to play in the all-star game.
110
00:07:07,817 --> 00:07:09,609
It's down to the three of you.
111
00:07:09,777 --> 00:07:12,251
The final test is speed skating.
112
00:07:13,986 --> 00:07:15,286
On your marks...
113
00:07:15,908 --> 00:07:16,699
Get set...
114
00:07:17,316 --> 00:07:18,117
Die.
115
00:07:39,890 --> 00:07:40,868
Nice try,{\* Goldenface,}
116
00:07:40,993 --> 00:07:43,226
except you forgot one thing:
to kill me.
117
00:07:43,394 --> 00:07:45,236
I wasn't trying to kill you.
118
00:07:45,361 --> 00:07:47,169
I was trying to slow you down.
119
00:07:52,361 --> 00:07:53,932
- By the way...
- Yeah?
120
00:07:54,405 --> 00:07:55,863
How's your wife doing?
121
00:07:59,347 --> 00:08:00,660
Congratulations.
122
00:08:01,348 --> 00:08:03,306
You came in second.
Not bad either, champ.
123
00:08:03,431 --> 00:08:05,123
I'm so sorry I have to do this.
124
00:08:20,639 --> 00:08:21,788
I'm so sorry.
125
00:08:23,579 --> 00:08:25,379
I'm intercepting a name...
126
00:08:25,696 --> 00:08:26,978
Jasmine Windsong.
127
00:08:27,781 --> 00:08:29,438
She works for Goldenface.
128
00:08:29,899 --> 00:08:33,276
But what I can't figure out is,
who is the Funky Cat?
129
00:08:33,444 --> 00:08:34,835
Not who, what.
130
00:08:35,210 --> 00:08:37,405
The Funky Cat
is the hippest jazz club in town.
131
00:08:47,666 --> 00:08:49,709
He cut the part
where my circuit board malfunctioned?
132
00:08:49,834 --> 00:08:52,545
Then what was the point
of spilling the drink on me?
133
00:08:53,614 --> 00:08:57,613
They call me Jasmine Windsong
134
00:09:02,460 --> 00:09:04,710
He finished his movie?
No kidding.
135
00:09:05,792 --> 00:09:07,994
That's great.
Yeah, good for him.
136
00:09:20,373 --> 00:09:24,744
The hostages are under the stadium
137
00:09:31,689 --> 00:09:32,752
Check, please.
138
00:09:32,920 --> 00:09:35,171
You have to let us go, Goldenface.
139
00:09:35,339 --> 00:09:36,585
We have families.
140
00:09:37,383 --> 00:09:39,135
This is gonna show them
141
00:09:39,260 --> 00:09:40,885
that I mean business.
142
00:09:43,711 --> 00:09:44,514
See ya.
143
00:09:52,898 --> 00:09:55,381
Far and away
the most expensive shot of the movie,
144
00:09:56,371 --> 00:09:58,597
but it was "intregral" to the story.
145
00:10:01,381 --> 00:10:02,699
It's Scarn!
146
00:10:03,588 --> 00:10:05,243
Sorry about your friend, Scarn.
147
00:10:05,411 --> 00:10:07,226
The joke's on you, Goldenface.
148
00:10:07,351 --> 00:10:09,497
That man was a wanted animal rapist.
149
00:10:09,931 --> 00:10:12,917
We've searched the whole building.
Where is the bomb?
150
00:10:14,025 --> 00:10:16,921
We've searched the whole building.
Where is the bomb?
151
00:10:17,822 --> 00:10:19,424
We've searched the... Okay.
152
00:10:19,592 --> 00:10:22,051
He said, "Where is the bomb?"
153
00:10:22,362 --> 00:10:23,428
In the puck.
154
00:10:24,619 --> 00:10:26,180
But why are you telling me this?
155
00:10:26,348 --> 00:10:27,807
Because I'm gonna kill you.
156
00:10:27,975 --> 00:10:31,019
Unless you forgive me
for murdering your wife.
157
00:10:42,782 --> 00:10:44,598
Go puck yourself.
158
00:10:49,736 --> 00:10:51,289
That was not scripted.
159
00:10:57,296 --> 00:10:58,446
More Tylenol.
160
00:10:58,821 --> 00:11:00,214
You've already had four.
161
00:11:00,382 --> 00:11:01,439
Oh, God!
162
00:11:02,901 --> 00:11:03,760
So good.
163
00:11:03,928 --> 00:11:05,369
You're lucky to be alive.
164
00:11:05,888 --> 00:11:08,456
It'll take a lot more than a bullet
to the brain, lungs, heart,
165
00:11:08,581 --> 00:11:11,643
back, and balls
to kill Michael Scarn.
166
00:11:11,811 --> 00:11:14,006
Let's just make sure
that everything's...
167
00:11:14,131 --> 00:11:15,626
working properly.
168
00:11:27,493 --> 00:11:30,578
You said the bomb is in the puck?
169
00:11:31,914 --> 00:11:33,915
Is that where
you hid the bomb, Goldenface?
170
00:11:37,318 --> 00:11:39,143
But why {\*would you blow up }the stadium?
171
00:11:39,268 --> 00:11:41,041
You own the stadium.
172
00:11:41,166 --> 00:11:44,217
For the insurance money...
I knew it all along.
173
00:11:44,488 --> 00:11:46,260
You will never get away with this.
174
00:11:59,522 --> 00:12:01,172
Where had I gone wrong?
175
00:12:01,978 --> 00:12:05,882
All I wanted was to start
a family with my beautiful wife.
176
00:12:06,007 --> 00:12:09,507
But somewhere along the way,
things got messed up.
177
00:12:09,995 --> 00:12:13,416
It wasn't easy for Scarn to admit
that he lost his self-confidence.
178
00:12:13,956 --> 00:12:15,290
And he hadn't, of course.
179
00:12:15,826 --> 00:12:18,026
He just wasn't using it right now.
180
00:12:19,795 --> 00:12:20,962
Beer me, Billy.
181
00:12:21,390 --> 00:12:23,256
You {\*don't }look {\*so good}bad.
What's got you down?
182
00:12:23,424 --> 00:12:25,842
I got problems, Billy.
Big problems.
183
00:12:26,010 --> 00:12:28,308
You got problems?
My TV don't work.
184
00:12:28,768 --> 00:12:32,107
I pay 30 bucks a month
for the damn satellite "Whatsahoozit."
185
00:12:32,232 --> 00:12:33,750
I can't even get the damn game.
186
00:12:33,875 --> 00:12:36,477
Now, you tell me,
what's worse than that?
187
00:12:37,230 --> 00:12:38,479
Don't {\*ever }change{\*, Billy}.
188
00:12:40,176 --> 00:12:43,359
Goldenface is going to blow up
the NHL all-star game tomorrow.
189
00:12:44,779 --> 00:12:46,446
I see what you mean about problems.
190
00:12:46,614 --> 00:12:48,512
I know what'll cheer you up.
191
00:12:48,943 --> 00:12:51,659
That table of bachelorettes {\*over }there
bought you this drink.
192
00:12:56,851 --> 00:13:00,173
Ever banged
an entire bachelorette party, baby?
193
00:13:01,367 --> 00:13:04,609
Why are you singling my line out,
like, a million years later?
194
00:13:05,090 --> 00:13:07,800
I'm too depressed
to save the big game, Billy.
195
00:13:07,968 --> 00:13:10,967
I'm gonna cheer you up
the only ways I know hows.
196
00:13:14,558 --> 00:13:15,725
{\*Hit }G-9 on the jukebox.
197
00:13:15,893 --> 00:13:19,562
No, Billy, I haven't done
that dance since my wife died.
198
00:13:19,730 --> 00:13:21,913
There's a whole crowd
of people out there
199
00:13:22,038 --> 00:13:24,734
who need to learn
how to do the Scarn.
200
00:13:33,503 --> 00:13:35,477
My name's Michael Scarn
And I'm here to say
201
00:13:35,602 --> 00:13:37,497
I'm about to do the Scarn
in a major way
202
00:13:42,184 --> 00:13:44,111
You jump to the right,
and you shake a hand
203
00:13:44,236 --> 00:13:46,387
Then you jump to the left,
and you shake that hand
204
00:13:46,512 --> 00:13:48,622
You meet new friends,
you tie some yarn
205
00:13:48,747 --> 00:13:50,675
And that's how you do the Scarn
206
00:13:50,800 --> 00:13:52,777
You jump to the right,
and you shake a hand
207
00:13:52,972 --> 00:13:55,098
Then you jump to the left,
and you shake that hand
208
00:13:55,266 --> 00:13:57,307
Meet new friends, tie that yarn
209
00:13:57,432 --> 00:13:59,350
That's how you do the Scarn
210
00:13:59,475 --> 00:14:01,688
You jump to the right
and you shake that hand
211
00:14:02,152 --> 00:14:03,152
Stop.
212
00:14:03,903 --> 00:14:05,971
Meet new friends, tie that yarn
213
00:14:06,096 --> 00:14:08,194
That's how you do the Scarn!
Boom!
214
00:14:08,362 --> 00:14:10,922
If doing the Scarn is gay,
215
00:14:11,512 --> 00:14:14,200
then I'm the biggest queer on Earth!
216
00:14:17,154 --> 00:14:18,504
I'm really sorry.
217
00:14:23,085 --> 00:14:25,609
I'm sorry.
I'm really, really sorry.
218
00:14:26,130 --> 00:14:28,589
{\*I think }I was just relieved
to see {\*that Michael }Scarn got his confidence back.
219
00:14:28,757 --> 00:14:30,466
Yeah, {\*Michael, }the movie's amazing.
220
00:14:30,634 --> 00:14:33,094
It's {\*, like, }one of the best movies
I've ever seen in my life.
221
00:14:33,262 --> 00:14:34,804
You should enter it in festivals.
222
00:14:34,972 --> 00:14:35,847
Or carnivals.
223
00:14:36,857 --> 00:14:39,976
Well, that's a pretty good reaction.
That's pretty cool.
224
00:14:41,687 --> 00:14:43,895
Did you like it?
Did you like that?
225
00:14:44,020 --> 00:14:45,070
Which part?
226
00:14:49,176 --> 00:14:50,820
- All right.
- Come on.
227
00:14:52,615 --> 00:14:55,783
- No, come on!
- We have to see the end.
228
00:14:55,951 --> 00:14:57,952
No, it's not good enough.
229
00:14:58,120 --> 00:15:00,580
Some people
are really popping on-screen.
230
00:15:07,256 --> 00:15:09,848
{\pub}- Good movie.
- Good?
231
00:15:09,973 --> 00:15:11,549
Everybody {\*out there }says it's great.
232
00:15:12,204 --> 00:15:15,354
- I loved it.
- Did you? What did you love about it?
233
00:15:16,581 --> 00:15:20,016
I loved that you got to work together
with all your friends.
234
00:15:20,184 --> 00:15:22,769
Isn't that so great
when you can all work {\*together }like that?
235
00:15:24,021 --> 00:15:27,057
Holly, this isn't Ocean's Eleven,
where you get together with {\*all your }friends,
236
00:15:27,182 --> 00:15:29,442
and you just have fun,
{\*and you don't }caring not about how it {\*turns out}ends.
237
00:15:30,237 --> 00:15:32,437
What'd you really think, honestly?
238
00:15:35,050 --> 00:15:37,300
Is it because you're afraid
of where this is gonna take me?
239
00:15:37,425 --> 00:15:40,412
Because, {\*see, }I need you
to keep me grounded.
240
00:15:42,091 --> 00:15:43,539
I'm not worried about that.
241
00:15:45,361 --> 00:15:46,711
This is 11 years.
242
00:15:47,998 --> 00:15:50,448
This has been my dream
for 11 years...
243
00:15:50,899 --> 00:15:54,634
And if you don't think it's great,
then {\*you're basically saying}you don't believe in my dream.
244
00:15:55,424 --> 00:15:57,887
It's your dream?
You never even mentioned it before.
245
00:15:58,055 --> 00:16:00,306
We talk
about a lot of things, Holly.
246
00:16:00,431 --> 00:16:04,435
You know, I was eventually
going to get around to my dream{\*, obviously}.
247
00:16:05,496 --> 00:16:08,273
11 years that I could've been working
on the Scarn Nebulus.
248
00:16:08,749 --> 00:16:11,067
Why do you have
to make a movie at all?
249
00:16:11,235 --> 00:16:13,361
{\*Because }If I don't have this,
what do I have? {\*I have }Nothing.
250
00:16:14,541 --> 00:16:17,573
You can't think of anything else
that you might have?
251
00:16:17,741 --> 00:16:19,993
I have my book on business,
Somehow I Manage.
252
00:16:20,345 --> 00:16:24,080
I have my HBO Comedy Special,
here I go again, dot, dot, dot.
253
00:16:24,248 --> 00:16:25,790
But you know what?
254
00:16:25,958 --> 00:16:29,006
When I really think about it,
none of those things
255
00:16:29,615 --> 00:16:31,713
are as real to me as my movie.
256
00:16:33,079 --> 00:16:33,881
I'm real.
257
00:16:34,680 --> 00:16:36,175
You're a real pain in the ass.
258
00:16:36,947 --> 00:16:39,848
And now I'm gonna go watch the movie
with people who think it's great.
259
00:16:39,973 --> 00:16:42,486
And I'm sorry I called you
a pain in the ass.
260
00:16:42,790 --> 00:16:44,642
I'm angry, and I love you.
261
00:16:47,558 --> 00:16:48,808
I love you too.
262
00:16:49,523 --> 00:16:51,471
I'm a huge Woody Allen fan.
263
00:16:52,315 --> 00:16:53,984
Although I've only seen Antz.
264
00:16:54,109 --> 00:16:57,198
But I'll tell you something:
what I respect about that man,
265
00:16:57,323 --> 00:17:00,687
is that when he was going through
all {\*of that stuff }that came out in the press,
266
00:17:00,812 --> 00:17:03,838
about how Antz was just
a rip-off of A Bug's Life,
267
00:17:03,963 --> 00:17:06,970
he stayed true to his films...
268
00:17:07,533 --> 00:17:10,533
Or at least the film that I saw,
which, {\*again, }was Antz.
269
00:17:10,802 --> 00:17:11,852
Thing is...
270
00:17:12,564 --> 00:17:14,260
I thought Bug's Life was better,
271
00:17:14,385 --> 00:17:16,146
much better than Antz.
272
00:17:17,028 --> 00:17:19,528
Point is,
don't listen to your critics.
273
00:17:20,247 --> 00:17:21,747
Listen to your fans.
274
00:17:25,009 --> 00:17:27,109
Who likes Threat Level Midnight?
275
00:17:28,270 --> 00:17:30,146
Then who wants to watch the rest?
276
00:17:33,711 --> 00:17:36,498
Michael, you have to get
to that puck before halftime,
277
00:17:36,623 --> 00:17:38,571
or the whole stadium will explode.
278
00:17:38,739 --> 00:17:41,908
I know. {\*It's a }Good thing my trainer
and mentor is here to cheer me on.
279
00:17:42,076 --> 00:17:43,159
Cherokee Jack?
280
00:17:43,327 --> 00:17:44,909
Michael, he died.
281
00:17:53,770 --> 00:17:55,922
This one's for you, Cherokee Jack.
282
00:18:07,685 --> 00:18:10,645
We filmed this during an actual
Scranton High School hockey game,
283
00:18:10,813 --> 00:18:12,563
{\*They were }trying to qualify for States.
284
00:18:13,360 --> 00:18:14,574
It's fine. It's great.
285
00:18:14,699 --> 00:18:16,658
No, actually,
it was really screwed up,
286
00:18:16,783 --> 00:18:20,336
because they were trying to qualify.
287
00:18:20,461 --> 00:18:22,490
They were disqualified.
{\*They had to }By forfeit{\* the game}.
288
00:18:23,668 --> 00:18:24,575
Undefeated{\* season}.
289
00:18:24,743 --> 00:18:26,577
That's why there were
so many people there.
290
00:18:29,330 --> 00:18:32,703
- Why is your face gold?
- Why do you care?
291
00:18:33,479 --> 00:18:35,104
I'm just making conversation.
292
00:18:36,129 --> 00:18:37,979
I worked in a gold factory.
293
00:18:38,733 --> 00:18:41,217
We had a boss
who only cared about money.
294
00:18:41,385 --> 00:18:42,661
I'm sorry.
295
00:18:42,786 --> 00:18:44,786
- It is good.
- No, it's not.
296
00:18:45,695 --> 00:18:46,695
It's not.
297
00:18:47,632 --> 00:18:49,732
But they really seem
to be enjoying it.
298
00:18:50,400 --> 00:18:51,290
Come on.
299
00:18:51,415 --> 00:18:52,979
Please, Goldenface, let us go!
300
00:19:01,572 --> 00:19:02,739
Cherokee Jack.
301
00:19:02,907 --> 00:19:05,322
I want you
to take all your frustrations
302
00:19:05,447 --> 00:19:07,910
with women, the system,
with everything.
303
00:19:08,647 --> 00:19:10,121
Take it out on the puck,
304
00:19:10,576 --> 00:19:12,165
all on the puck.
305
00:19:38,833 --> 00:19:40,485
We got sports games again.
306
00:19:57,774 --> 00:20:00,624
Some breakfast for me,
some breakfast for you.
307
00:20:06,596 --> 00:20:08,746
I guess I did let him be a robot.
308
00:20:09,925 --> 00:20:11,025
I'll get it.
309
00:20:11,392 --> 00:20:12,767
Man, I love being retired.
310
00:20:13,761 --> 00:20:14,644
Scarn here.
311
00:20:14,812 --> 00:20:16,751
- Michael, it's the president.
- Hello, sir.
312
00:20:16,876 --> 00:20:18,356
I need you for another mission.
313
00:20:21,456 --> 00:20:22,277
I'm in.
314
00:20:26,157 --> 00:20:27,490
Isn't the president evil?
315
00:20:29,955 --> 00:20:31,005
Yes, he is.
316
00:20:31,526 --> 00:20:33,247
No, he{\*'s doing it} wants to catch the president.
317
00:20:33,372 --> 00:20:35,873
No, Dwight, he's just being stupid.
318
00:20:38,594 --> 00:20:40,894
Michael Scarn was back in the game.
319
00:20:41,490 --> 00:20:42,812
And I bet you're wondering
320
00:20:42,937 --> 00:20:45,587
why do I know so much
about Michael Scarn?
321
00:20:47,256 --> 00:20:49,588
Well, because I am Michael Scarn.