1
00:00:07,515 --> 00:00:09,120
I have the best stock
survival shelter

2
00:00:09,256 --> 00:00:10,832
in north eastern Pennsylvania.

3
00:00:11,200 --> 00:00:12,305
But everything is a **life.

4
00:00:12,448 --> 00:00:14,048
So I must eat and then replace

5
00:00:14,138 --> 00:00:15,641
everything that is
about to expire.

6
00:00:16,424 --> 00:00:17,823
It's nice not to have
to plan my meals.

7
00:00:18,775 --> 00:00:20,823
You're eating
eight-year-old tomatoes.

8
00:00:20,907 --> 00:00:22,441
They're still good
for another week.

9
00:00:22,492 --> 00:00:24,076
You know, I think
I might have some type of cheese

10
00:00:24,144 --> 00:00:25,578
in the back of my fridge
you might like.

11
00:00:25,645 --> 00:00:27,480
I've got some cheese
you might like too...

12
00:00:27,547 --> 00:00:29,281
In between my toes.

13
00:00:31,018 --> 00:00:32,868
Hardy-har-har.
All right, picture this.

14
00:00:32,936 --> 00:00:35,388
Snowy Ash drizzles
from the sky.

15
00:00:35,455 --> 00:00:37,423
A rabid pack of dogs
surrounds you

16
00:00:37,474 --> 00:00:39,892
as the flame at the end
of your stick dies out.

17
00:00:39,960 --> 00:00:41,627
There's only one hope left
for you...

18
00:00:41,678 --> 00:00:42,812
the door to my shelter.

19
00:00:42,896 --> 00:00:44,463
You pound.
You beg.

20
00:00:44,531 --> 00:00:45,931
"Dwight, please let me in."

21
00:00:45,982 --> 00:00:47,850
But I ignore your cries
and do not let you in.

22
00:00:47,934 --> 00:00:49,835
You want to know why?
Because of the sign

23
00:00:49,903 --> 00:00:51,136
that says, "no pounding.
No begging."

24
00:00:51,188 --> 00:00:53,239
No.
Because you laughed at me.

25
00:00:53,306 --> 00:00:56,075
Kevin will be eaten.
Pam will be taken slave.

26
00:00:56,143 --> 00:00:58,944
Jim will be made
a warlord's Jester.

27
00:00:59,012 --> 00:01:00,579
Meredith will do okay.

28
00:01:00,647 --> 00:01:03,282
Be assured this day will come.
It's just a matter of time.

29
00:01:03,350 --> 00:01:05,084
Could be one month,
could be two months.

30
00:01:05,152 --> 00:01:06,252
Three months.

31
00:01:06,319 --> 00:01:09,321
- Could be.
- Four months.

32
00:01:09,373 --> 00:01:11,357
I could see
that happening, yes.

33
00:01:11,425 --> 00:01:12,825
Eight months?

34
00:01:12,893 --> 00:01:14,860
That's a realistic timeline.

35
00:01:14,928 --> 00:01:18,230
11 months.

36
00:01:18,298 --> 00:01:20,199
Perhaps.

37
00:01:20,267 --> 00:01:23,502
Okay, wait, now really think
hard about this one.

38
00:01:23,570 --> 00:01:26,238
One year.

39
00:01:26,306 --> 00:01:28,357
I could see that
as a very real possibility.

40
00:01:28,442 --> 00:01:30,076
494 months.

41
00:01:30,143 --> 00:01:32,445
I could see that happening.

42
00:01:32,512 --> 00:01:35,514
495 months.
That's just...

43
00:01:53,589 --> 00:01:56,214
Sync by n17t01
www.addic7ed.com

44
00:01:57,036 --> 00:01:58,804
I really thought I was becoming

45
00:01:58,872 --> 00:02:00,339
too much of a womanizer.

46
00:02:00,406 --> 00:02:03,141
I realized I had shirts in
five different women's houses.

47
00:02:03,209 --> 00:02:04,376
Still not seeing
the problem there.

48
00:02:04,444 --> 00:02:05,711
All right.

49
00:02:05,778 --> 00:02:08,947
Truth is, I got a couple
love bumps on my ding-dong,

50
00:02:08,998 --> 00:02:10,949
so I was like,
"oh, game over."

51
00:02:11,017 --> 00:02:12,968
It was the best of times.

52
00:02:13,052 --> 00:02:14,987
It was the "awesomest"
of times.

53
00:02:15,054 --> 00:02:18,056
And now packer
wants to come home.

54
00:02:18,124 --> 00:02:20,893
And, oh, look who's here
to sign off on it...

55
00:02:20,960 --> 00:02:23,495
my boo, Holly.

56
00:02:23,563 --> 00:02:26,632
Hi.
Hi.

57
00:02:26,699 --> 00:02:27,816
You must be Todd.

58
00:02:27,901 --> 00:02:30,152
Whoa, I'm sorry.
Michael, I thought

59
00:02:30,236 --> 00:02:32,354
we were meeting Holly today,
not Jennifer Aniston.

60
00:02:32,438 --> 00:02:34,990
Very funny.

61
00:02:35,074 --> 00:02:36,742
Okay, let's get started.
After you.

62
00:02:36,809 --> 00:02:39,645
Okay.

63
00:02:41,714 --> 00:02:43,148
Oh, Michael,
this'll be just us.

64
00:02:43,216 --> 00:02:44,583
Ah, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.

65
00:02:44,651 --> 00:02:48,153
Just so you know,
he's at his funniest

66
00:02:48,204 --> 00:02:49,922
when you've given him,
like, five shots.

67
00:02:49,989 --> 00:02:51,540
- Okay.
- And it also helps

68
00:02:51,624 --> 00:02:54,042
if you've had five shots.
I already have.

69
00:02:58,731 --> 00:02:59,765
Why is packer back?

70
00:02:59,832 --> 00:03:00,899
Oh, is packer here?

71
00:03:00,967 --> 00:03:02,367
Why is he talking to Holly?

72
00:03:02,435 --> 00:03:03,602
Don't know, don't care.

73
00:03:03,670 --> 00:03:04,770
Michael loves you,

74
00:03:04,837 --> 00:03:06,889
and your sales speak
for themselves.

75
00:03:06,973 --> 00:03:10,609
So...
Oh!

76
00:03:10,676 --> 00:03:12,611
Yes!
The pack is back.

77
00:03:12,679 --> 00:03:15,447
Ladies and gentlemen,
I would like to introduce you

78
00:03:15,515 --> 00:03:17,282
to a man who needs
no introduction,

79
00:03:17,350 --> 00:03:19,618
probably because most of you
have done it with him.

80
00:03:19,686 --> 00:03:21,954
Just kidding. He wouldn't be
interested in any of you.

81
00:03:22,021 --> 00:03:23,422
In all seriousness,

82
00:03:23,489 --> 00:03:26,124
Todd packer
is a permanent salesman

83
00:03:26,192 --> 00:03:27,559
at this branch.

84
00:03:27,627 --> 00:03:29,995
And I would like to invite you
now to welcome him

85
00:03:30,046 --> 00:03:31,296
with open arms.
Yes!

86
00:03:31,364 --> 00:03:33,465
What?

87
00:03:33,532 --> 00:03:35,217
It's great to be among friends.

88
00:03:35,301 --> 00:03:38,387
And until then,
you suckers will do.

89
00:03:38,471 --> 00:03:39,922
Nice.

90
00:03:40,006 --> 00:03:41,723
We got burned.
You did.

91
00:03:41,808 --> 00:03:44,092
You got burned,
because packer's back.

92
00:03:44,177 --> 00:03:47,579
Packer is turning in his car
for a desk.

93
00:03:47,647 --> 00:03:51,767
He is turning in his condoms
for a condominium,

94
00:03:51,851 --> 00:03:53,652
although he's probably going
to have to use condoms

95
00:03:53,720 --> 00:03:55,487
from here on out.
Holly...

96
00:03:55,554 --> 00:03:57,322
You approved this?
Yes, I did.

97
00:03:57,390 --> 00:03:59,775
I think Todd's gonna make
a great addition to the staff.

98
00:03:59,859 --> 00:04:01,827
- You did approve it?
- Yeah.

99
00:04:01,894 --> 00:04:04,746
What don't you understand
about the word "approved"?

100
00:04:04,831 --> 00:04:06,415
It seems a couple of you

101
00:04:06,499 --> 00:04:09,167
don't know what the word
"approved" means.

102
00:04:09,235 --> 00:04:13,238
I have very little patience
for stupidity.

103
00:04:13,306 --> 00:04:15,607
Sorry we're late.
Gabe fell in the shower.

104
00:04:15,675 --> 00:04:17,109
Such a klutz.

105
00:04:17,176 --> 00:04:19,744
Yeah, and it took the fire
department forever to get there.

106
00:04:19,796 --> 00:04:23,181
Oh, my God.
Where did this come from?

107
00:04:23,249 --> 00:04:24,683
Who did this?

108
00:04:24,750 --> 00:04:26,151
I got Erin a new computer

109
00:04:26,219 --> 00:04:28,320
because the one
at reception sucked.

110
00:04:28,388 --> 00:04:29,621
I should know.

111
00:04:29,689 --> 00:04:31,890
And I don't want to say
the other one was old,

112
00:04:31,958 --> 00:04:35,293
but its I.P. Number was one.

113
00:04:35,361 --> 00:04:37,996
Right?

114
00:04:38,064 --> 00:04:39,114
Thank you, Pam.

115
00:04:39,198 --> 00:04:40,632
Aw, you're welcome.

116
00:04:40,700 --> 00:04:42,985
My pleasure.

117
00:04:50,326 --> 00:04:51,493
Can I do something for you?

118
00:04:51,577 --> 00:04:53,645
I just helped someone out.
It feels good.

119
00:04:53,713 --> 00:04:55,280
Nice.

120
00:04:55,331 --> 00:04:57,349
You know, I cleaned up
our daughter for, like, an hour

121
00:04:57,417 --> 00:04:58,950
at 4:00 A.M.
This morning, so...

122
00:04:59,018 --> 00:05:00,452
So you know the feeling.

123
00:05:02,622 --> 00:05:04,506
Special delivery
for Dwight k. Schrute.

124
00:05:04,590 --> 00:05:05,590
I didn't order anything.

125
00:05:05,641 --> 00:05:06,958
And I don't have anything
for you.

126
00:05:07,010 --> 00:05:08,927
But I do want to talk to you
about something.

127
00:05:08,978 --> 00:05:10,896
We have been thinking
about where packer should sit,

128
00:05:10,963 --> 00:05:13,465
and we can't just sit around
waiting for creed to die.

129
00:05:13,533 --> 00:05:15,701
Well, there's a lot of seats
in the annex.

130
00:05:15,768 --> 00:05:17,936
So you wouldn't mind
permanently relocating

131
00:05:18,004 --> 00:05:20,038
so that packer can take
this desk here.

132
00:05:20,106 --> 00:05:22,407
Thanks, man.
It would mean a lot to me.

133
00:05:22,475 --> 00:05:25,177
I've been sitting here
for ten years, Michael.

134
00:05:25,244 --> 00:05:27,279
Well, I was there for 12 years.

135
00:05:27,346 --> 00:05:29,147
Plus, my name's carved
under the desk.

136
00:05:29,198 --> 00:05:31,033
- No, it is not.
- It is too.

137
00:05:31,117 --> 00:05:33,752
- Where?
- Right there.

138
00:05:33,819 --> 00:05:34,886
Check it out.

139
00:05:34,954 --> 00:05:37,222
Michael, I don't want
to move desks.

140
00:05:37,290 --> 00:05:39,508
Don't be a baby.
We're... okay, there it is.

141
00:05:39,592 --> 00:05:41,510
"Packer was here
and so was your mom."

142
00:05:41,594 --> 00:05:43,328
- Yeah.
- Do I have any say in this?

143
00:05:43,396 --> 00:05:45,514
No!

144
00:05:45,598 --> 00:05:47,733
It's $20 to watch, Halpert.
Oh.

145
00:05:47,800 --> 00:05:49,434
Hey.

146
00:05:49,502 --> 00:05:51,669
Whose dirt box is this?

147
00:05:51,721 --> 00:05:52,904
That's our zen garden.

148
00:05:52,972 --> 00:05:56,274
What do you grow in here,
bull crap?

149
00:05:58,177 --> 00:06:00,178
Hey, Holly.

150
00:06:00,229 --> 00:06:02,064
Hey.

151
00:06:02,148 --> 00:06:03,532
What's up, guys?

152
00:06:03,616 --> 00:06:04,866
Don't "what's up?" Us.

153
00:06:04,951 --> 00:06:07,686
You think you're so cute
with your pretty blond hair.

154
00:06:07,754 --> 00:06:09,687
Whoa, whoa.
Pull it back.

155
00:06:09,739 --> 00:06:11,523
Um, why did you hire
Todd packer?

156
00:06:11,591 --> 00:06:13,091
He's seriously awful.

157
00:06:13,159 --> 00:06:15,243
Michael's recommendation
was glowing.

158
00:06:15,328 --> 00:06:17,796
Honestly, he's been nothing
but nice to me.

159
00:06:17,864 --> 00:06:20,749
That's how he gets you
to take off your panties.

160
00:06:20,833 --> 00:06:23,701
- Why are you nodding?
- United front.

161
00:06:23,753 --> 00:06:25,170
Okay, look,
we can't fire someone

162
00:06:25,238 --> 00:06:26,538
because we don't like him.

163
00:06:26,606 --> 00:06:28,039
Right. This isn't
the U.S. government.

164
00:06:28,091 --> 00:06:30,092
What are you referencing?

165
00:06:30,176 --> 00:06:32,577
Everything.
Everything.

166
00:06:32,645 --> 00:06:34,513
Do any of you
have any concrete complaints

167
00:06:34,580 --> 00:06:35,714
about something he's done?

168
00:06:35,782 --> 00:06:37,382
Well, I mean,
he humped Michael.

169
00:06:37,450 --> 00:06:38,600
Well, if that's the case,

170
00:06:38,684 --> 00:06:40,602
I guess I've got
to be fired too.

171
00:06:42,221 --> 00:06:44,556
Hey. Hey, you guys.

172
00:06:44,624 --> 00:06:46,158
The yarmouth regatta video
is up.

173
00:06:46,225 --> 00:06:48,493
Gather round.
Check it out.

174
00:06:48,561 --> 00:06:50,328
This guy's
on a full beam reach.

175
00:06:50,396 --> 00:06:52,130
They're hiking out like mad.

176
00:06:52,198 --> 00:06:54,633
Luff him up.
Luff him up.

177
00:06:54,700 --> 00:06:55,734
Nice... ah!

178
00:06:57,203 --> 00:06:59,671
This computer's a hunk of junk.

179
00:06:59,738 --> 00:07:02,340
Hey, sailor, come watch
your regatta over here.

180
00:07:02,408 --> 00:07:04,342
Where did you get this?

181
00:07:04,410 --> 00:07:07,078
Pam gave it to me.

182
00:07:07,130 --> 00:07:08,680
This is a sick computer.

183
00:07:08,747 --> 00:07:10,582
Gwen Stefani has this computer.

184
00:07:10,650 --> 00:07:13,251
Uh, Pamela.

185
00:07:13,302 --> 00:07:14,469
Yep?

186
00:07:14,554 --> 00:07:16,972
What does a guy have to do
to whom

187
00:07:17,056 --> 00:07:18,190
to get one of them?

188
00:07:18,257 --> 00:07:20,025
You have a computer, Andy.

189
00:07:20,092 --> 00:07:22,110
Yeah, but if you donated
my computer to Africa,

190
00:07:22,195 --> 00:07:24,429
it would become famous as
the slowest computer in Africa.

191
00:07:24,480 --> 00:07:25,630
Okay, listen,

192
00:07:25,698 --> 00:07:27,599
we just don't have
the budget for it, okay?

193
00:07:27,667 --> 00:07:29,868
Reception needed a computer,
so we got one.

194
00:07:29,936 --> 00:07:32,337
Well, Andy's desk
needs a computer.

195
00:07:32,405 --> 00:07:33,989
And, I mean, it's just
kind of a coincidence

196
00:07:34,073 --> 00:07:35,707
that I work there, but...

197
00:07:35,775 --> 00:07:37,843
Yes, but reception
is a one-person department.

198
00:07:37,910 --> 00:07:39,177
If I get you a new computer,

199
00:07:39,245 --> 00:07:41,046
I have to get one
for everyone in sales...

200
00:07:41,113 --> 00:07:43,165
for Dwight, for Stanley.
It would be crazy.

201
00:07:43,249 --> 00:07:46,951
So something good happening
to Stanley is crazy now.

202
00:07:47,003 --> 00:07:48,386
They're not asking for one.

203
00:07:48,454 --> 00:07:49,721
I am.
I-I need it.

204
00:07:49,788 --> 00:07:52,174
If you're just handing
them out, I want one too.

205
00:07:52,258 --> 00:07:54,392
Phyllis, nobody's
handing anything out.

206
00:07:54,460 --> 00:07:55,960
See, that's
what I'm talking about.

207
00:07:56,012 --> 00:07:57,829
What, are you gonna play
mah-jongg faster?

208
00:07:57,897 --> 00:07:59,648
I'm sorry, Andy.

209
00:08:04,904 --> 00:08:06,471
Hey, what's going on, you guys?

210
00:08:06,539 --> 00:08:08,740
Yeah.
Three muske-queers.

211
00:08:08,807 --> 00:08:11,159
Mean, but good.

212
00:08:11,244 --> 00:08:14,412
So, Todd, this must be nice
for you, getting off the road.

213
00:08:14,480 --> 00:08:16,081
You get to spend some time
with your daughter.

214
00:08:16,148 --> 00:08:17,582
I don't know.

215
00:08:17,650 --> 00:08:20,051
I love her and all,
but she's turned into a bitch.

216
00:08:20,119 --> 00:08:22,921
Most days she's great, but
some days she acts like her mom.

217
00:08:22,988 --> 00:08:24,990
Well, some girls
go through a phase.

218
00:08:25,057 --> 00:08:27,492
Yeah.
Your life is so insane.

219
00:08:27,560 --> 00:08:29,494
You should write a book.

220
00:08:29,562 --> 00:08:30,896
Since when did you learn
how to read?

221
00:08:30,963 --> 00:08:33,265
I do know how to read, though.

222
00:08:33,332 --> 00:08:36,167
Yeah. You know
how to read a menu.

223
00:08:37,603 --> 00:08:39,704
This guy.

224
00:08:43,009 --> 00:08:44,676
I...
He's right.

225
00:08:44,727 --> 00:08:46,945
I mean,
I could lose some weight.

226
00:08:47,013 --> 00:08:48,980
Kevin, in sumo culture,

227
00:08:49,048 --> 00:08:51,616
you'd be considered
a promising up-and-comer.

228
00:08:57,490 --> 00:09:00,742
What the heck?
Why do you have Erin's computer?

229
00:09:00,826 --> 00:09:02,193
It's crazy, right?

230
00:09:02,245 --> 00:09:04,763
Erin just wanted me to have it,
so we switched.

231
00:09:04,830 --> 00:09:06,915
What?
Erin, is that true?

232
00:09:06,999 --> 00:09:09,401
I just thought he seemed
to really need a new computer,

233
00:09:09,468 --> 00:09:10,752
and he knows so much
about that one.

234
00:09:10,836 --> 00:09:12,220
Erin, it's not up to you.

235
00:09:12,305 --> 00:09:14,872
This computer
was for reception, okay?

236
00:09:14,924 --> 00:09:16,374
It's not yours to give away.

237
00:09:18,110 --> 00:09:19,978
Pam.

238
00:09:20,045 --> 00:09:23,231
When I'm freaking out,
I just sort of step back,

239
00:09:23,316 --> 00:09:24,983
take three deep breaths.
I'm not freaking out.

240
00:09:25,050 --> 00:09:26,785
Okay?
And then I ask myself,

241
00:09:26,852 --> 00:09:30,238
"is this worth
freaking out about?"

242
00:09:30,323 --> 00:09:33,058
Andy, why should she have
your crappy computer?

243
00:09:33,125 --> 00:09:34,242
Oh, that's interesting.

244
00:09:34,327 --> 00:09:36,661
So you also think
my computer's crappy.

245
00:09:36,729 --> 00:09:38,396
Switch
the computers back, Andy.

246
00:09:40,666 --> 00:09:42,467
- Seriously?
- Seriously.

247
00:09:42,535 --> 00:09:43,901
Pam, come on.

248
00:09:43,953 --> 00:09:45,170
Now, please.

249
00:09:45,237 --> 00:09:47,289
Fine!

250
00:09:47,373 --> 00:09:51,409
Please make sure
nobody is humping me.

251
00:09:51,460 --> 00:09:53,078
Oh, if you're going
back to the annex,

252
00:09:53,145 --> 00:09:54,846
could you take these to Dwight?

253
00:09:54,914 --> 00:09:56,281
I think the ants are waking up.

254
00:09:56,349 --> 00:09:58,099
They need
to start farming soon.

255
00:09:58,184 --> 00:09:59,517
Thanks.

256
00:09:59,585 --> 00:10:01,753
Best day ever.
Best day ever.

257
00:10:01,821 --> 00:10:04,622
So much is happening.

258
00:10:04,690 --> 00:10:07,225
Oh. Question...
should I get stripes shaved

259
00:10:07,293 --> 00:10:08,926
into the side of my head?
No.

260
00:10:08,978 --> 00:10:10,428
No.
Please.

261
00:10:10,479 --> 00:10:11,963
Did Todd tell you to do that?

262
00:10:12,031 --> 00:10:13,448
- Yes.
- Yeah.

263
00:10:13,532 --> 00:10:15,116
You love him, right?

264
00:10:15,201 --> 00:10:16,785
You love him.
I can tell.

265
00:10:16,869 --> 00:10:18,670
- I love you.
- No, no, not me.

266
00:10:18,738 --> 00:10:19,871
Him.
What...?

267
00:10:19,938 --> 00:10:21,139
He's certainly opinionated.

268
00:10:21,207 --> 00:10:22,540
If you're not gonna take
the ants over,

269
00:10:22,608 --> 00:10:23,975
I should probably
just do it myself.

270
00:10:24,043 --> 00:10:26,127
- Oh, I'm going.
- Whoa, no.

271
00:10:26,212 --> 00:10:28,279
Are you jealous of him...

272
00:10:28,331 --> 00:10:29,848
Because you think
he's funnier than you?

273
00:10:29,915 --> 00:10:31,016
Honey.

274
00:10:31,083 --> 00:10:32,450
I don't think
he's funnier than me.

275
00:10:32,518 --> 00:10:33,802
Oh, he's funnier than me.

276
00:10:33,886 --> 00:10:36,354
He's not funny at all.

277
00:10:36,422 --> 00:10:38,923
So I'm less funny
than not funny at all?

278
00:10:38,974 --> 00:10:40,809
Uh-oh, I think the ants
are starting to eat each other.

279
00:10:40,893 --> 00:10:43,812
No, what I'm saying
is he's not funny,

280
00:10:43,896 --> 00:10:47,315
but you're funnier than he is.
Um...

281
00:10:47,400 --> 00:10:50,151
Okay, bill cosby, Steve Martin,

282
00:10:50,236 --> 00:10:51,469
<i>Charlie bit my finger,</i>

283
00:10:51,520 --> 00:10:52,704
Michael Scott,

284
00:10:52,772 --> 00:10:55,139
then all the way down here,

285
00:10:55,191 --> 00:10:56,474
Todd packer.

286
00:10:56,525 --> 00:10:58,243
That's insane.

287
00:10:58,310 --> 00:11:01,079
Honey, he's a jerk.

288
00:11:01,147 --> 00:11:04,165
Oh, for Pete's sake,
it just needs to be done.

289
00:11:09,213 --> 00:11:10,566
So you two are
married now, right?

290
00:11:11,209 --> 00:11:12,943
- Yeah.
- That's sweet.

291
00:11:13,010 --> 00:11:14,044
How's the sex?

292
00:11:14,111 --> 00:11:16,079
- Yeah.
- Hey, packer...

293
00:11:16,147 --> 00:11:19,382
I made you some hot chocolate.
Why?

294
00:11:19,450 --> 00:11:21,701
'Cause I want to let
bygones be bygones,

295
00:11:21,786 --> 00:11:23,119
show you I'm cool.

296
00:11:23,187 --> 00:11:25,238
You're the new guy.
It's cold out. I made too much.

297
00:11:25,323 --> 00:11:27,557
I got this awesome hot-chocolate
recipe from my wife.

298
00:11:27,625 --> 00:11:28,959
That's a lot of reasons.

299
00:11:29,026 --> 00:11:29,960
Drink it.

300
00:11:30,027 --> 00:11:31,378
I think I'll pass.

301
00:11:31,462 --> 00:11:34,331
The only hot chocolate I'm into
is Vivica A. Fox.

302
00:11:34,398 --> 00:11:35,832
Can I talk to you for a second?

303
00:11:35,883 --> 00:11:37,217
- Here.
- Okay. Okay.

304
00:11:37,301 --> 00:11:39,102
So this hot-chocolate thing
with packer...

305
00:11:39,170 --> 00:11:40,337
None of your business.

306
00:11:40,404 --> 00:11:42,639
Well, you know
you can't actually poison him.

307
00:11:42,707 --> 00:11:44,007
Right?
It isn't poison.

308
00:11:44,058 --> 00:11:46,343
It's a laxative. People take
laxatives all the time.

309
00:11:46,410 --> 00:11:48,678
This is just a lot more
of a laxative.

310
00:11:48,729 --> 00:11:50,430
Let me handle it.

311
00:11:50,514 --> 00:11:52,482
I really think we should join
forces on this one.

312
00:11:52,550 --> 00:11:53,984
- Really?
- What do we think?

313
00:11:54,051 --> 00:11:55,485
What would drive him crazy?

314
00:11:55,553 --> 00:11:57,771
- I know.
- Here we go.

315
00:11:57,855 --> 00:12:00,757
Pepto-bismol
in his hot chocolate.

316
00:12:00,825 --> 00:12:03,159
You have got to stop
with the hot-chocolate stuff.

317
00:12:03,227 --> 00:12:04,494
Okay.

318
00:12:04,562 --> 00:12:06,563
I was thinking
maybe we could jam his drawers

319
00:12:06,631 --> 00:12:08,131
so that they only come out
two inches.

320
00:12:08,199 --> 00:12:09,966
Then, that way, you can see
everything in them,

321
00:12:10,034 --> 00:12:11,334
but you can't get at it.

322
00:12:11,402 --> 00:12:12,969
Does Edgar Allen poe know
about that one?

323
00:12:13,037 --> 00:12:15,305
So sinister.

324
00:12:15,373 --> 00:12:17,040
That wouldn't annoy a person
at all.

325
00:12:17,091 --> 00:12:18,842
Where do you come up
with this stuff?

326
00:12:18,909 --> 00:12:21,411
All right, well, this isn't
my best, but call froggy 101,

327
00:12:21,479 --> 00:12:23,647
say that we're the tour manager
for Justin Bieber,

328
00:12:23,714 --> 00:12:25,131
and we're giving away
free tickets.

329
00:12:25,216 --> 00:12:27,050
We give 'em a number to call
for the tickets,

330
00:12:27,101 --> 00:12:28,952
and it's his number.
Who is justice beaver?

331
00:12:30,755 --> 00:12:33,356
He... it's a crime-fighting beaver.

332
00:12:33,424 --> 00:12:35,592
Why don't you write up
your best 40 ideas

333
00:12:35,660 --> 00:12:37,110
and email 'em to me...
can you do that?

334
00:12:37,194 --> 00:12:39,145
Absolutely.
I'll email you 100.

335
00:12:39,230 --> 00:12:41,598
Yeah. Write up
your list of 100,

336
00:12:41,666 --> 00:12:43,233
edit it down to your top 40,

337
00:12:43,284 --> 00:12:44,534
and I'll read it over.

338
00:12:44,602 --> 00:12:46,069
Pam, can I talk
to you in private?

339
00:12:46,120 --> 00:12:48,788
I don't know if there's really
a private place in this office.

340
00:12:48,873 --> 00:12:50,457
Well, I put a sign-up sheet
in the conference room,

341
00:12:50,541 --> 00:12:52,158
and I signed us up
for three mods.

342
00:12:52,243 --> 00:12:55,712
A mod is five minutes, and it
started two minutes ago, so...

343
00:12:55,780 --> 00:12:56,779
You did that?

344
00:12:56,831 --> 00:12:58,081
Can we talk about this
in the meeting?

345
00:12:58,149 --> 00:12:59,449
'Cause we're already late.
Okay.

346
00:12:59,500 --> 00:13:00,783
Wow, when did people
sign up for that?

347
00:13:00,835 --> 00:13:02,502
- Mind if I close the door?
- No.

348
00:13:02,586 --> 00:13:05,955
What you did out there earlier
was totally uncool.

349
00:13:06,023 --> 00:13:07,457
Well, what I was supposed
to do, huh...

350
00:13:07,508 --> 00:13:08,692
let you walk all over me?

351
00:13:08,759 --> 00:13:10,660
You humiliated me
in front of everybody.

352
00:13:10,728 --> 00:13:14,297
Okay, well, I didn't think
about it like that.

353
00:13:14,365 --> 00:13:16,399
It's just...
I can't do anything about it.

354
00:13:16,467 --> 00:13:18,668
I can't replace your computer
unless that one breaks.

355
00:13:18,736 --> 00:13:21,137
Well, I mean,
it's pretty broken already.

356
00:13:21,205 --> 00:13:23,873
Well, if it breaks all the way,

357
00:13:23,941 --> 00:13:27,544
I can get you a new one.

358
00:13:27,611 --> 00:13:29,979
Pretty sneaky, sis.

359
00:13:33,117 --> 00:13:37,020
Hey, cats, we got a jam
session in mods 6, 9, and 12.

360
00:13:40,791 --> 00:13:42,425
There are 400 of these.

361
00:13:42,493 --> 00:13:44,094
Yeah, I couldn't cut it down.

362
00:13:44,161 --> 00:13:45,428
They're all good.

363
00:13:45,496 --> 00:13:48,598
So good.
"Number three... eat a frog."

364
00:13:48,666 --> 00:13:49,666
That sounds promising.

365
00:13:49,734 --> 00:13:51,434
"Number four... eat a dog."

366
00:13:51,502 --> 00:13:54,604
I don't know, um,
from a practical standpoint...

367
00:13:54,672 --> 00:13:56,672
135.
Did you like 135?

368
00:13:56,724 --> 00:14:01,044
"Eat a brog." Maybe it's
'cause I didn't understand it.

369
00:14:01,112 --> 00:14:02,696
I just had a couple of notes.

370
00:14:02,780 --> 00:14:05,448
Let me grab a pen and...

371
00:14:05,516 --> 00:14:06,566
Damn it.

372
00:14:08,486 --> 00:14:10,286
Ah, just when we were...

373
00:14:10,354 --> 00:14:13,890
just when
we were getting going.

374
00:14:24,635 --> 00:14:27,871
Allow all cookies?
Why, "soitenly."

375
00:14:27,938 --> 00:14:30,440
Pop-ups?
Yes, please.

376
00:14:30,508 --> 00:14:33,226
Bit torrent streaming
from a Somalian music website?

377
00:14:33,310 --> 00:14:34,877
Yeah, why not?

378
00:14:36,614 --> 00:14:39,399
Oh, I hope you don't get sick,
Mr. computer.

379
00:14:39,483 --> 00:14:41,818
Why are you
doing this to me, Andy?

380
00:14:41,886 --> 00:14:45,054
Because I hate your broke ass.

381
00:14:45,122 --> 00:14:47,774
And a 76ers fan to boot.
I like that.

382
00:14:47,858 --> 00:14:49,626
And you made Hank smile.

383
00:14:49,693 --> 00:14:51,928
That doesn't happen often.
You're very charming.

384
00:14:51,996 --> 00:14:54,897
You know what? That is something
that you should take upstairs

385
00:14:54,949 --> 00:14:58,501
and use on the people
that really matter.

386
00:14:58,569 --> 00:15:00,270
- Why?
- I don't know.

387
00:15:00,337 --> 00:15:03,139
Holly mentioned
that there were some complaints

388
00:15:03,207 --> 00:15:05,809
and that you had said
some things about Kevin.

389
00:15:05,876 --> 00:15:07,460
- Holly said that?
- Yeah.

390
00:15:07,545 --> 00:15:09,813
She was laughing hysterically
the whole time.

391
00:15:09,880 --> 00:15:11,848
I guess you said something
weird about your daughter.

392
00:15:11,916 --> 00:15:13,099
She asked me, Michael.

393
00:15:13,184 --> 00:15:14,851
It would have been rude
not to answer.

394
00:15:14,919 --> 00:15:16,519
You've been on the road
a long time.

395
00:15:16,587 --> 00:15:18,772
And you've been an outdoor cat.

396
00:15:18,856 --> 00:15:20,774
And now you have to be
an indoor cat,

397
00:15:20,858 --> 00:15:23,126
so you can't be peeing
all over the walls.

398
00:15:23,194 --> 00:15:25,928
Michael, can I open
the kimono with you?

399
00:15:27,148 --> 00:15:28,932
I've been on the road too long.

400
00:15:28,999 --> 00:15:31,968
But I want to connect
with my daughter.

401
00:15:32,036 --> 00:15:34,604
And it's not right to call her
a bitch in front of strangers.

402
00:15:34,672 --> 00:15:36,172
No, it isn't.

403
00:15:36,240 --> 00:15:38,291
You're right. I got to...
I got to watch my behavior.

404
00:15:38,375 --> 00:15:41,311
Yeah, a little bit.

405
00:15:41,378 --> 00:15:44,981
Don't give up on me.

406
00:15:45,049 --> 00:15:46,249
I won't.

407
00:15:48,031 --> 00:15:50,286
Okay. Everybody?
I need you to see this,

408
00:15:50,709 --> 00:15:52,660
because maybe
there is somebody here

409
00:15:52,728 --> 00:15:55,179
that you underestimated
who will surprise you.

410
00:15:55,263 --> 00:15:57,598
Todd packer
is going to apologize.

411
00:15:57,665 --> 00:15:59,583
Kevin, front and center...
come here.

412
00:15:59,651 --> 00:16:03,270
I got a lot of numbers here
to put together.

413
00:16:03,338 --> 00:16:05,539
Kevin, we know that you
are just trying to save face.

414
00:16:05,607 --> 00:16:07,841
We know that you are hurt
and embarrassed.

415
00:16:07,893 --> 00:16:09,393
That's silly.

416
00:16:09,478 --> 00:16:12,046
I should be apologizing
to packer,

417
00:16:12,114 --> 00:16:14,181
'cause everybody knows
that I can dish it

418
00:16:14,249 --> 00:16:15,733
as good as I can take it.

419
00:16:15,817 --> 00:16:17,051
Okay, sweetie,

420
00:16:17,119 --> 00:16:19,520
no, you shouldn't be apologizing
to packer.

421
00:16:19,571 --> 00:16:20,855
That doesn't make any sense.

422
00:16:20,922 --> 00:16:22,189
You ready for this?

423
00:16:22,257 --> 00:16:23,491
Are you ready for this?
- Mm-hmm.

424
00:16:23,558 --> 00:16:25,126
Gentlemen, start your engines.

425
00:16:25,193 --> 00:16:28,996
I'm sorry if you were offended
by my comments earlier.

426
00:16:29,047 --> 00:16:31,248
Well, like I said,
I wasn't offended,

427
00:16:31,333 --> 00:16:33,467
but I'll stand here
for the big show.

428
00:16:33,535 --> 00:16:35,736
Kevin, do you accept
the apology?

429
00:16:35,804 --> 00:16:36,837
Don't do it, Kevin.

430
00:16:36,888 --> 00:16:38,439
That's that fake kind
of apology.

431
00:16:38,507 --> 00:16:40,674
- Okay, go back to the annex.
- This is textbook.

432
00:16:40,725 --> 00:16:41,926
It's so uncool.

433
00:16:42,010 --> 00:16:44,095
Ryan does this
to me all the time,

434
00:16:44,179 --> 00:16:46,213
like it's some offense
to have feelings.

435
00:16:46,281 --> 00:16:48,315
Don't do it, Kevin.
Sometimes you overreact.

436
00:16:48,383 --> 00:16:50,050
Michael, how is this
supposed to work?

437
00:16:50,102 --> 00:16:51,769
Packer's gonna keep saying
terrible things,

438
00:16:51,853 --> 00:16:53,687
and then he's just gonna make
half-ass apologies,

439
00:16:53,755 --> 00:16:55,222
and we're back to square one.

440
00:16:55,273 --> 00:16:57,625
Okay. You want an apology?
Here goes.

441
00:16:57,692 --> 00:17:00,394
Kevin, I am so sorry.

442
00:17:00,445 --> 00:17:03,414
You are skinny,
and you're a genius.

443
00:17:03,498 --> 00:17:05,733
That...
that was maybe too much.

444
00:17:05,801 --> 00:17:09,736
Packer is a survivor
of divorce, Stanley.

445
00:17:09,788 --> 00:17:12,739
Packer doesn't speak
with his child, Meredith.

446
00:17:12,791 --> 00:17:16,293
Packer never lived up to his
parents' expectations, Andy.

447
00:17:18,413 --> 00:17:21,298
Angela loves pussycats.
Packers loves...

448
00:17:21,383 --> 00:17:23,517
- No, don't.
- I was going to say "dogs"!

449
00:17:23,585 --> 00:17:25,252
Okay, you know what?
This is over.

450
00:17:25,320 --> 00:17:27,921
Apology has been issued,
and we're through with it.

451
00:17:27,973 --> 00:17:29,924
Packer's going to be here
until the day he dies,

452
00:17:29,991 --> 00:17:32,476
just like the rest of us.

453
00:17:34,146 --> 00:17:36,814
So, listen, we have
to really scuff this up.

454
00:17:36,898 --> 00:17:38,765
No, no, no, we can say

455
00:17:38,817 --> 00:17:40,784
that the previous owner
was a neat freak

456
00:17:40,869 --> 00:17:42,536
or an elegant old lady,
and she just kept it around

457
00:17:42,604 --> 00:17:44,438
in case her grandkids
came to visit.

458
00:17:44,506 --> 00:17:46,607
But they died,
and they never came.

459
00:17:46,675 --> 00:17:48,108
I'm gonna make myself cry.

460
00:17:48,176 --> 00:17:50,277
Andy, this is the deal we made.

461
00:17:50,328 --> 00:17:51,946
That's probably good.
That's enough.

462
00:17:52,013 --> 00:17:53,514
We should break
this hinge maybe.

463
00:17:53,582 --> 00:17:55,049
Let's not go crazy.

464
00:17:55,116 --> 00:17:56,550
Well, thanks.
Will do.

465
00:17:56,618 --> 00:17:58,552
Absolutely.
Now, when you get down there,

466
00:17:58,620 --> 00:18:00,787
Jo's a little bit,
uh, forgetful,

467
00:18:00,839 --> 00:18:02,789
so she may have locked
the gate,

468
00:18:02,841 --> 00:18:04,958
but what you're gonna do is,
go ahead, hop it,

469
00:18:05,010 --> 00:18:07,794
and just head back to the pool.
That sounds weird.

470
00:18:07,846 --> 00:18:10,481
It is weird.
Look at you... perceptive.

471
00:18:10,565 --> 00:18:12,700
Now I know why jo
has kept her eye on you.

472
00:18:12,767 --> 00:18:14,401
And you make sure

473
00:18:14,469 --> 00:18:16,487
to get down there and check out
the Harry Potter world.

474
00:18:16,571 --> 00:18:19,240
Whatever you want to do
in your spare time is up to you.

475
00:18:19,307 --> 00:18:22,743
Harry Potter world
is supposed to be fantastic.

476
00:18:22,811 --> 00:18:24,311
Apparently, as soon
as corporate found out

477
00:18:24,379 --> 00:18:25,812
I wanted to come in
off the road,

478
00:18:25,864 --> 00:18:28,649
jo offered me a cushy new job
in Tallahassee.

479
00:18:28,700 --> 00:18:29,983
And here's the best part.

480
00:18:30,035 --> 00:18:32,653
I'm a huge alligator nerd.

481
00:18:32,721 --> 00:18:36,523
I can name you every genus,
every subspecies.

482
00:18:36,591 --> 00:18:38,525
Also, I'm a huge boob nerd.

483
00:18:38,593 --> 00:18:41,061
Check it out and have
a free butterbeer on us.

484
00:18:41,129 --> 00:18:43,047
Keep the receipt,
and we'll get you back.

485
00:18:43,131 --> 00:18:44,164
What are you doing?

486
00:18:44,216 --> 00:18:45,599
Shh, this is
a very important client.

487
00:18:45,667 --> 00:18:47,201
All right,
so just pack your bags.

488
00:18:47,269 --> 00:18:48,702
And, uh, be sure to bring
those swimming trunks.

489
00:18:48,770 --> 00:18:50,170
Bye, now.
Bye.

490
00:18:50,222 --> 00:18:51,372
I cannot believe this.

491
00:18:51,439 --> 00:18:53,140
You're sending packer
to Florida?

492
00:18:53,208 --> 00:18:55,042
Why?
Because he's a jerk.

493
00:18:55,110 --> 00:18:56,376
- You gave him my desk.
- Okay.

494
00:18:56,428 --> 00:18:58,579
So you're tricking him
into flying to Florida.

495
00:18:58,647 --> 00:19:01,265
This wasn't my first choice.
Jim had so many better ideas.

496
00:19:01,349 --> 00:19:02,917
You have to tell him. You have
to tell him what you did.

497
00:19:02,984 --> 00:19:05,786
No, no, no, no, no, no.
That... that is not in the plan.

498
00:19:05,854 --> 00:19:07,855
That is actually anti
what we're doing.

499
00:19:07,923 --> 00:19:09,523
He is my oldest friend.
I am going to tell him.

500
00:19:09,591 --> 00:19:11,025
Wait.
Why don't we come up with a plan

501
00:19:11,076 --> 00:19:13,227
that we're all happy about?
Yeah, that...

502
00:19:13,295 --> 00:19:15,763
Pam, how is this thing
even any better

503
00:19:15,830 --> 00:19:16,780
than my old computer?

504
00:19:16,865 --> 00:19:18,666
Come on, Andy.
I mean, you said

505
00:19:18,733 --> 00:19:20,968
you wanted a computer...
this is the best I could do.

506
00:19:21,036 --> 00:19:22,670
Where'd you even find
this thing...

507
00:19:22,737 --> 00:19:24,371
like, in the corner
of the warehouse?

508
00:19:24,422 --> 00:19:26,307
Yes, I found it on a shelf
in the corner of the warehouse.

509
00:19:26,374 --> 00:19:28,609
All right, well, thank you

510
00:19:28,677 --> 00:19:30,377
for my garbage computer.

511
00:19:38,520 --> 00:19:40,421
You're looking
at the new face of corporate.

512
00:19:40,488 --> 00:19:42,806
Gonna put the "ass"
in Tallahassee.

513
00:19:42,891 --> 00:19:44,191
Yes, about that...

514
00:19:44,259 --> 00:19:46,293
Oh, man, we got to go out
and celebrate tonight.

515
00:19:46,361 --> 00:19:48,462
Well, I don't know
if that's a good idea.

516
00:19:48,530 --> 00:19:50,731
- The old ball and chain?
- No. No.

517
00:19:50,782 --> 00:19:52,333
Nothing like that at all.

518
00:19:52,400 --> 00:19:53,817
Listen,
I'm gonna tell you something

519
00:19:53,902 --> 00:19:55,786
that none of these people
have the stones to tell you.

520
00:19:55,870 --> 00:19:57,404
It's your girlfriend.

521
00:19:57,472 --> 00:19:59,340
She's uptight.

522
00:19:59,407 --> 00:20:01,575
Sorry?

523
00:20:01,643 --> 00:20:02,826
I know this stuff can hurt,

524
00:20:02,911 --> 00:20:04,678
but I wish someone had said
something to me

525
00:20:04,746 --> 00:20:06,013
about my ex-wife.

526
00:20:06,081 --> 00:20:07,464
All I'm saying is,
in about a month or so,

527
00:20:07,549 --> 00:20:08,582
have you down to Florida,

528
00:20:08,650 --> 00:20:11,819
introduce you
to all the local talent.

529
00:20:14,556 --> 00:20:16,623
Sounds great.

530
00:20:16,691 --> 00:20:17,825
Yeah.
It's gonna be so good.

531
00:20:17,892 --> 00:20:19,259
That is.
It's gonna be awesome.

532
00:20:19,327 --> 00:20:22,930
I think you're really going
to enjoy it down there.

533
00:20:26,167 --> 00:20:27,668
I'm sorry about your friend.

534
00:20:27,736 --> 00:20:29,636
No.
He's an ass.

535
00:20:29,704 --> 00:20:31,772
You are.

536
00:20:33,775 --> 00:20:36,026
You are.

537
00:20:36,111 --> 00:20:38,145
What are you, wicked smaht?

538
00:20:38,213 --> 00:20:40,814
No, you are.

539
00:20:51,329 --> 00:20:52,996
Saw Andy's new computer
you found in the warehouse.

540
00:20:53,080 --> 00:20:54,247
Yep.
Lucked out.

541
00:20:54,315 --> 00:20:56,716
Yeah, you really did,
'cause I know every inch

542
00:20:56,784 --> 00:20:58,117
of that warehouse.

543
00:20:58,169 --> 00:21:00,187
Yep.
Super lucky.

544
00:21:00,254 --> 00:21:01,555
Maybe you could go
back down there

545
00:21:01,622 --> 00:21:04,090
and see if you can find me
some extra sick days.

546
00:21:11,047 --> 00:21:12,136
Yeah.

547
00:21:13,358 --> 00:21:16,814
You know what?
I think I saw one sick day...

548
00:21:18,902 --> 00:21:20,519
I think maybe I saw five.

549
00:21:20,942 --> 00:21:21,862
Three.

550
00:21:25,560 --> 00:21:26,880
I'm full on corrupt.

551
00:21:26,915 --> 00:21:28,900
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