1
00:00:01,965 --> 00:00:03,696
Andy's coming back today.
2
00:00:05,071 --> 00:00:08,774
Andy's coming back today.
Ha!
3
00:00:10,110 --> 00:00:11,944
Andy's coming back today.
4
00:00:12,012 --> 00:00:14,313
David Wallace sent him
on an outward-bound
5
00:00:14,381 --> 00:00:16,181
wilderness adventure
for a whole month
6
00:00:16,249 --> 00:00:17,850
to make him more decisive
and confident.
7
00:00:17,917 --> 00:00:19,952
He sent his own son too.
8
00:00:20,020 --> 00:00:24,189
And the counselor said
they both grew up big time.
9
00:00:26,659 --> 00:00:29,628
How was my summer?
It was pretty mixed.
10
00:00:29,696 --> 00:00:32,431
I invented a new power drink
made of beet run-off.
11
00:00:32,499 --> 00:00:36,935
Mmm. Mmm!
So that's really good.
12
00:00:37,003 --> 00:00:41,473
But I got some disappointing
medical news.
13
00:00:41,541 --> 00:00:43,075
Mr. Schrute,
the results are in.
14
00:00:43,143 --> 00:00:46,011
- You're not the father.
- I told you.
15
00:00:48,381 --> 00:00:51,383
Oh, God!
Oh, my God!
16
00:00:51,451 --> 00:00:54,053
Oh, what a summer.
17
00:00:54,120 --> 00:00:56,321
An emotional roller coaster.
18
00:00:56,389 --> 00:00:59,058
I ran over a turtle
in the parking lot...
19
00:01:00,460 --> 00:01:05,030
But then I saved him by gluing
his shell back together.
20
00:01:05,098 --> 00:01:07,232
But I'm not that good
at puzzles...
21
00:01:07,300 --> 00:01:09,334
Oh, that piece doesn't
go there.
22
00:01:09,402 --> 00:01:10,836
Shh.
23
00:01:10,904 --> 00:01:15,107
So I patched him with stuff
from around the office.
24
00:01:15,175 --> 00:01:18,444
But I couldn't get
the pieces to fit right.
25
00:01:18,511 --> 00:01:23,015
Then, one day, while I was
reaching for the glue,
26
00:01:23,083 --> 00:01:25,784
I crushed his shell again.
27
00:01:25,852 --> 00:01:29,721
But I rebuilt him even better
that time.
28
00:01:29,789 --> 00:01:35,694
But it turned out
the turtle was already dead.
29
00:01:35,762 --> 00:01:40,132
Probably when I ran over him
the first time.
30
00:01:40,200 --> 00:01:44,103
For us, um...
Nothing new, really.
31
00:01:44,170 --> 00:01:45,137
The kids are great.
32
00:01:45,205 --> 00:01:46,505
You are really good at modesty.
33
00:01:46,573 --> 00:01:48,574
She's a genius. She painted
this incredible mural
34
00:01:48,641 --> 00:01:49,875
in the kids' room.
35
00:01:49,943 --> 00:01:51,577
There's a hippo leading
a parade of 500 children...
36
00:01:51,644 --> 00:01:54,079
Okay, well, you had
that interesting thing.
37
00:01:54,147 --> 00:01:55,514
Oh... yeah.
38
00:01:55,582 --> 00:01:57,850
Yes, Jim's friend
is starting a new company
39
00:01:57,917 --> 00:01:59,651
based on this idea that Jim had
40
00:01:59,719 --> 00:02:01,019
when they were back in college.
41
00:02:01,087 --> 00:02:02,955
It's sports marketing,
basically,
42
00:02:03,022 --> 00:02:04,389
but the athletes are partners.
43
00:02:04,457 --> 00:02:05,891
And he wanted Jim
to be a partner too.
44
00:02:05,959 --> 00:02:08,727
In Philly, so...
that doesn't really work
45
00:02:08,795 --> 00:02:10,429
for the family.
46
00:02:10,497 --> 00:02:13,632
But watch this guy make
a billion dollars off my idea.
47
00:02:13,700 --> 00:02:15,834
He said if it takes off,
he's gonna buy us a new car.
48
00:02:15,902 --> 00:02:17,970
An Altima or better.
49
00:02:18,037 --> 00:02:19,905
Kelly Kapoor is gone.
50
00:02:19,973 --> 00:02:23,575
Her fiance, Ravi, was hired
as a Pediatrics Professor
51
00:02:23,643 --> 00:02:25,077
at Miami University.
52
00:02:25,145 --> 00:02:26,812
I don't need 'em anymore.
53
00:02:26,880 --> 00:02:29,448
I am going to Miami,
bee-yotches,
54
00:02:29,516 --> 00:02:32,784
to hang with Lebron James
and Gloria Estefan.
55
00:02:32,852 --> 00:02:36,388
Miami University, in Ohio.
56
00:02:36,456 --> 00:02:39,458
On her last day, Kelly was still
a little confused about it.
57
00:02:39,526 --> 00:02:44,930
- Enjoy the snow, losers.
- I'm so happy for you, Kelly.
58
00:02:44,998 --> 00:02:46,865
Shortly after Kelly left,
Ryan quit
59
00:02:46,933 --> 00:02:49,401
and also moved to Ohio,
60
00:02:49,469 --> 00:02:51,303
for what he claimed were
unrelated reasons.
61
00:02:51,371 --> 00:02:53,338
I've actually done a lot
of market research,
62
00:02:53,406 --> 00:02:55,941
and it turns out that
Southwestern Ohio is going to be
63
00:02:56,009 --> 00:02:57,709
the next Silicon Valley.
64
00:02:57,777 --> 00:02:59,111
They call it
the Silicon Prairie.
65
00:02:59,179 --> 00:03:04,616
It's a big university town,
and, uh...
66
00:03:04,684 --> 00:03:06,985
It's not garbage,
it's my clothes.
67
00:03:07,053 --> 00:03:11,690
And that was our summer.
68
00:03:11,758 --> 00:03:15,160
- We good?
- Yeah. Thanks.
69
00:03:15,228 --> 00:03:16,461
Don't you guys have everything?
70
00:03:16,529 --> 00:03:19,331
I mean, it's just
a paper company.
71
00:03:19,399 --> 00:03:21,633
Yeah, well, we're more
following you guys
72
00:03:21,701 --> 00:03:23,202
to see how you turn out.
73
00:03:23,269 --> 00:03:24,803
Oh, yeah, I guess we were
74
00:03:24,871 --> 00:03:26,939
kind of dramatic
in the beginning.
75
00:03:27,006 --> 00:03:30,976
Well, I don't think anything's
gonna change in our lives now.
76
00:03:31,044 --> 00:03:33,212
With work and two kids,
there's just...
77
00:03:33,279 --> 00:03:35,180
Nothing interesting's
gonna happen to us
78
00:03:35,248 --> 00:03:38,750
for a long, long time.
79
00:04:01,513 --> 00:04:03,676
Sync and corrections by n17t01
www.addic7ed.com
80
00:04:04,857 --> 00:04:07,346
Andy's coming back today.
81
00:04:07,413 --> 00:04:09,281
Hey, uh, does anybody know
82
00:04:09,349 --> 00:04:10,449
where we throw these out?
83
00:04:10,516 --> 00:04:11,850
Oh, my God.
84
00:04:11,918 --> 00:04:14,720
- It's called a garbage can.
- Helpless.
85
00:04:14,787 --> 00:04:17,556
There's two new guys
back there with me now.
86
00:04:17,624 --> 00:04:20,726
They're in their 20s,
and we really get along.
87
00:04:20,793 --> 00:04:22,761
Looking good.
88
00:04:22,829 --> 00:04:26,632
Just three single guys...
getting into trouble.
89
00:04:26,699 --> 00:04:28,734
They're like the new
Jim and Dwight.
90
00:04:30,970 --> 00:04:34,239
Oh, yes, yes.
I see that. Perfect.
91
00:04:34,307 --> 00:04:36,975
Hey, new Jim,
come sit on my face.
92
00:04:37,043 --> 00:04:40,445
No, thank you.
My name's Pete.
93
00:04:40,513 --> 00:04:43,982
No, Pete is not the new Jim.
94
00:04:44,050 --> 00:04:45,384
The only thing
we have in common is that
95
00:04:45,451 --> 00:04:47,953
neither of us wants to sit
on Meredith's face.
96
00:04:48,021 --> 00:04:49,721
And if that makes him
the new Jim,
97
00:04:49,789 --> 00:04:52,924
then every human being
in the world is the new Jim.
98
00:04:52,992 --> 00:04:55,560
Andy's here! Old Dwight,
new Dwight, Andy's here.
99
00:04:55,628 --> 00:04:58,397
New Jim, Tuna, Andy's here.
Pam, he's here.
100
00:04:58,464 --> 00:05:01,633
Hey! Ahh.
101
00:05:01,701 --> 00:05:05,804
Wow, I thought about this place
a lot when I was on solo.
102
00:05:05,872 --> 00:05:08,473
Three days on a mountain,
it'll change you.
103
00:05:08,541 --> 00:05:10,976
The things we think we need.
104
00:05:11,044 --> 00:05:13,345
Clocks.
Yeah, right.
105
00:05:13,413 --> 00:05:15,647
It sounds amazing.
Tell us all about it.
106
00:05:15,715 --> 00:05:16,748
What are you still doing here?
107
00:05:16,816 --> 00:05:19,484
Wonderful, thanks.
108
00:05:19,552 --> 00:05:22,254
You know, I had this
really funny dream
109
00:05:22,322 --> 00:05:24,456
during outward bound
that you died.
110
00:05:24,524 --> 00:05:27,426
Brilliant.
111
00:05:27,493 --> 00:05:29,995
See me in my office later.
112
00:05:30,063 --> 00:05:32,531
The new guys.
All right.
113
00:05:32,598 --> 00:05:35,133
- Clark and, um...
- Pete.
114
00:05:35,201 --> 00:05:36,568
Da da da da...
115
00:05:36,636 --> 00:05:38,103
In Outward Bound,
it was all about nicknames.
116
00:05:38,171 --> 00:05:40,038
They called me Iceman.
117
00:05:40,106 --> 00:05:41,206
You will be called "Plop."
118
00:05:41,274 --> 00:05:43,108
What... Why?
119
00:05:43,176 --> 00:05:44,276
'Cause you're always
taking dumps.
120
00:05:44,343 --> 00:05:45,310
No, I'm not.
121
00:05:45,378 --> 00:05:46,411
Come on, everybody defecates.
122
00:05:46,479 --> 00:05:48,814
Relax, Plop.
You will be called "Fart"
123
00:05:48,881 --> 00:05:50,949
- because you fart all the time.
- I love it.
124
00:05:51,017 --> 00:05:52,551
Actually, Andy,
we call this one
125
00:05:52,618 --> 00:05:54,019
"Dwight Jr."
126
00:05:54,087 --> 00:05:55,687
No, I prefer "Fart."
127
00:05:55,755 --> 00:05:58,190
No, Dwight Jr.
Infinitely better.
128
00:05:58,257 --> 00:05:59,358
You guys look exactly alike.
129
00:05:59,425 --> 00:06:02,060
Dwight, go stand next to him.
130
00:06:02,128 --> 00:06:03,395
- This is insane.
- I don't see it.
131
00:06:03,463 --> 00:06:05,530
I don't either.
I don't either.
132
00:06:05,598 --> 00:06:07,466
Whoa.
133
00:06:07,533 --> 00:06:10,268
Mind blown.
It's like father and son.
134
00:06:13,573 --> 00:06:15,907
It's...
135
00:06:15,975 --> 00:06:18,710
Dwight, you cool if we
call him Dwight Jr.?
136
00:06:18,778 --> 00:06:21,880
Yes.
Yes, I am.
137
00:06:26,085 --> 00:06:27,018
That's okay.
138
00:06:27,086 --> 00:06:31,323
- Dwight Jr.
- Ha.
139
00:06:31,391 --> 00:06:32,824
In a way, it's like
I have a son.
140
00:06:32,892 --> 00:06:34,393
And who knows?
Maybe some day
141
00:06:34,460 --> 00:06:37,429
they'll hire someone who looks
like a younger version of him.
142
00:06:37,497 --> 00:06:39,364
And then I'll have a grandson.
143
00:06:39,432 --> 00:06:42,100
Well, I need to give
my cat up for adoption.
144
00:06:42,168 --> 00:06:44,536
- Mmm.
- The one who uses the doorbell,
145
00:06:44,604 --> 00:06:46,071
or the one
with the Mexican hat,
146
00:06:46,139 --> 00:06:48,206
or the one
with the rain galoshes,
147
00:06:48,274 --> 00:06:50,008
or the one that you let
go around naked?
148
00:06:50,076 --> 00:06:51,877
Angela's cats are cute.
149
00:06:51,944 --> 00:06:55,147
So cute that you just want
to eat 'em.
150
00:06:55,214 --> 00:06:58,550
But you can't eat cats.
151
00:06:58,618 --> 00:07:01,953
You can't eat cats, Kevin.
152
00:07:02,021 --> 00:07:06,024
No, the one with the long hair
and the denim pants... Comstock.
153
00:07:06,092 --> 00:07:07,225
- Oh.
- Okay, look.
154
00:07:07,293 --> 00:07:09,594
He's such a special kitty.
155
00:07:09,662 --> 00:07:12,030
I just want to find him
a good home.
156
00:07:15,468 --> 00:07:19,871
He loves those pants.
157
00:07:19,939 --> 00:07:21,640
I'll take him.
158
00:07:21,707 --> 00:07:23,275
Please.
After the turtle?
159
00:07:23,342 --> 00:07:26,745
I am enormously proud
of what I did for that turtle!
160
00:07:26,813 --> 00:07:29,381
Oscar. Oscar.
Will you take him?
161
00:07:29,449 --> 00:07:30,916
No, I'm a dog person.
162
00:07:30,983 --> 00:07:33,251
If you pray enough,
163
00:07:33,319 --> 00:07:36,054
you can change yourself
into a cat person.
164
00:07:36,122 --> 00:07:38,089
Those guys always
turn back, Angela.
165
00:07:38,157 --> 00:07:40,192
David, outward bound
was incredible.
166
00:07:40,259 --> 00:07:42,327
I was the best at slacklining.
167
00:07:42,395 --> 00:07:43,662
I ate a worm.
168
00:07:43,729 --> 00:07:44,863
Glad to hear it.
169
00:07:44,931 --> 00:07:47,065
You sound really confident
and decisive.
170
00:07:47,133 --> 00:07:48,967
Hey, you wanted to see me?
171
00:07:49,035 --> 00:07:51,403
Yeah.
I gotta go, David.
172
00:07:51,471 --> 00:07:52,671
Why is Nellie still here?
173
00:07:52,738 --> 00:07:54,172
You can only fire Nellie
for cause.
174
00:07:54,240 --> 00:07:57,008
Hmm. Then I will
make up a cause.
175
00:07:57,076 --> 00:07:59,110
Except you just told me
you were gonna make it up.
176
00:07:59,178 --> 00:08:01,513
Now, if she sues,
I have to testify against you.
177
00:08:01,581 --> 00:08:03,915
Then forget
I just told you that.
178
00:08:03,983 --> 00:08:06,785
I can't. I took a course
at the Weintraub Memory Academy.
179
00:08:06,853 --> 00:08:09,287
Sat next to this woman
named Beverly Brook.
180
00:08:09,355 --> 00:08:11,389
She had a Greek salad
for lunch.
181
00:08:11,457 --> 00:08:12,491
See what I mean?
182
00:08:12,558 --> 00:08:15,594
Now I know why Michael
hated you so much.
183
00:08:15,661 --> 00:08:17,496
No, he didn't.
184
00:08:22,735 --> 00:08:25,871
Good boy.
Getting big and strong.
185
00:08:25,938 --> 00:08:27,539
Snack foods!
186
00:08:27,607 --> 00:08:30,108
Yep.
187
00:08:30,176 --> 00:08:31,510
Body by cheez-it.
188
00:08:31,577 --> 00:08:35,146
Ah, humor.
I have it too.
189
00:08:35,214 --> 00:08:37,782
Oh, boy,
I got a couple of tickets
190
00:08:37,850 --> 00:08:39,918
to The Slayer concert
ten months from now.
191
00:08:39,986 --> 00:08:40,986
You interested?
192
00:08:41,053 --> 00:08:44,189
I think I'm busy that night.
193
00:08:44,257 --> 00:08:45,390
Oh, or I would.
194
00:08:45,458 --> 00:08:47,292
Mmm, okay, well,
195
00:08:47,360 --> 00:08:49,661
we're both just kind of learning
as we go, aren't we?
196
00:08:49,729 --> 00:08:51,363
Learning what?
197
00:08:51,430 --> 00:08:56,134
Just... how this is gonna be.
You know.
198
00:08:56,202 --> 00:08:58,737
You have a beautiful
round head.
199
00:08:58,804 --> 00:09:00,906
Okay.
200
00:09:00,973 --> 00:09:03,174
So what kind of farming
you into, huh?
201
00:09:03,242 --> 00:09:06,811
More of a fruit man
or a root man?
202
00:09:06,879 --> 00:09:11,349
Hey, is this... is this code
for, like, gay stuff?
203
00:09:11,417 --> 00:09:12,684
'Cause if so,
that's totally fine.
204
00:09:12,752 --> 00:09:14,152
Like, I'm fine with it.
205
00:09:14,220 --> 00:09:16,755
But you know, you should know
that I'm into the ladies.
206
00:09:16,822 --> 00:09:20,358
Spoken like a true root man.
207
00:09:20,426 --> 00:09:21,960
Hey, you know,
if you're ever swamped,
208
00:09:22,028 --> 00:09:24,696
I can make
some sales calls for you.
209
00:09:24,764 --> 00:09:27,132
- My calls?
- So could you give me
210
00:09:27,199 --> 00:09:28,734
a list of all your clients,
or just the leads
211
00:09:28,801 --> 00:09:30,035
that you haven't had time
to pursue yet?
212
00:09:30,102 --> 00:09:31,069
You want a list of my clients?
213
00:09:31,437 --> 00:09:32,571
You want my leads?
214
00:09:32,638 --> 00:09:34,105
Yeah, I'll just
give it a glance.
215
00:09:34,173 --> 00:09:35,574
- Okay.
- I'll give it a read.
216
00:09:35,641 --> 00:09:36,908
Yeah, with my leads,
and stuff like that.
217
00:09:36,976 --> 00:09:38,109
Yeah.
218
00:09:38,177 --> 00:09:39,611
'Cause you're interested
in going into sales.
219
00:09:39,679 --> 00:09:40,679
- I am.
- Wow, that's great.
220
00:09:40,746 --> 00:09:42,681
- Yeah.
- That's great.
221
00:09:42,748 --> 00:09:44,883
Okay, good.
Let's talk about that, okay?
222
00:09:44,951 --> 00:09:47,953
- Okay.
- You're not getting my clients.
223
00:09:48,020 --> 00:09:51,089
Nice try.
224
00:09:51,157 --> 00:09:53,658
Paranoid?
I'm not familiar with the word.
225
00:09:53,726 --> 00:09:55,327
And I really don't have time
to learn new words
226
00:09:55,394 --> 00:09:56,561
right now, okay?
227
00:09:56,629 --> 00:09:58,763
A pudgy 22-year-old
is trying to take my job.
228
00:10:01,766 --> 00:10:03,500
Jim, get ready for the
battle of your life.
229
00:10:03,567 --> 00:10:05,001
Done. Explain.
230
00:10:05,069 --> 00:10:07,971
The new guys... Dwight Jr.
Is after my job.
231
00:10:08,038 --> 00:10:10,507
Yeah, there is a shark
hiding inside
232
00:10:10,574 --> 00:10:11,674
that adorable little cherub.
233
00:10:11,742 --> 00:10:13,309
Oh, now I get
what Pete was talking about
234
00:10:13,377 --> 00:10:14,577
at the sales meeting yesterday.
235
00:10:14,645 --> 00:10:17,747
Wait, sales...
What sales meeting?
236
00:10:17,815 --> 00:10:18,882
The new guys called one.
237
00:10:18,949 --> 00:10:20,316
The new guys called
a sales meeting?
238
00:10:20,384 --> 00:10:22,752
Clark ended the whole thing
with a karate demonstration.
239
00:10:22,820 --> 00:10:24,487
Did you know there was
a belt above black?
240
00:10:24,555 --> 00:10:26,556
There's no belt above black.
241
00:10:26,624 --> 00:10:29,125
- Is there a belt above black?
- You should ask him.
242
00:10:29,193 --> 00:10:30,593
It's a color
you would never expect.
243
00:10:34,165 --> 00:10:36,699
Too easy.
244
00:10:36,767 --> 00:10:40,003
Attention, everyone.
Comstock is still available.
245
00:10:40,070 --> 00:10:42,639
Oscar has been flirting
with adopting him,
246
00:10:42,706 --> 00:10:44,941
but still hasn't given me
a definite yes or no.
247
00:10:45,009 --> 00:10:47,377
- Definitely no.
- Fine.
248
00:10:47,444 --> 00:10:49,045
For any interested candidates,
249
00:10:49,113 --> 00:10:51,147
I will be conducting
20-minute interviews.
250
00:10:51,215 --> 00:10:53,917
My ideal situation would be
251
00:10:53,984 --> 00:10:56,619
an independently wealthy
cute couple
252
00:10:56,687 --> 00:10:58,388
with a strong commitment
to education.
253
00:10:58,455 --> 00:11:00,523
Black or white...
I'm fine with either.
254
00:11:00,591 --> 00:11:02,959
But not both.
Listen, you're in this,
255
00:11:03,027 --> 00:11:06,729
but you need to wow me, okay?
256
00:11:06,797 --> 00:11:08,064
I wanted to talk to you about
257
00:11:08,132 --> 00:11:10,066
our working relationship
this year.
258
00:11:10,134 --> 00:11:12,468
It's going to be terrible.
259
00:11:12,536 --> 00:11:14,571
Not necessarily.
260
00:11:14,638 --> 00:11:17,574
No, I'm going to make sure
that it is.
261
00:11:17,641 --> 00:11:19,976
And if it isn't, I will take
immediate action
262
00:11:20,044 --> 00:11:21,544
to rectify that.
263
00:11:21,612 --> 00:11:26,015
Now, I don't like
to throw around the "B" word,
264
00:11:26,083 --> 00:11:29,619
but I'm gonna be
a huge bitch to you.
265
00:11:31,288 --> 00:11:34,524
Now, this is called
slacklining.
266
00:11:34,592 --> 00:11:36,559
I set up the old slackline
to teach the office
267
00:11:36,627 --> 00:11:39,229
the skills of focus
and discipline.
268
00:11:39,296 --> 00:11:40,830
Or in the case
of certain individuals,
269
00:11:40,898 --> 00:11:44,834
the skills of humiliation
and looking really dumb.
270
00:11:44,902 --> 00:11:46,169
If you make it
all the way across,
271
00:11:46,237 --> 00:11:47,437
your confidence will soar.
272
00:11:47,504 --> 00:11:50,406
But if you Toby out...
Aah! Aah!
273
00:11:50,474 --> 00:11:52,842
Then you'll feel like
a real Nellie.
274
00:11:52,910 --> 00:11:55,044
How 'bout a hand?
Screw those guys.
275
00:11:55,112 --> 00:11:58,448
Now, these are my actual
outward bound counselors,
276
00:11:58,515 --> 00:11:59,582
Rafe and Feather.
277
00:11:59,650 --> 00:12:01,851
- Iceman.
- That's me.
278
00:12:01,919 --> 00:12:03,853
The powder is for
your protection.
279
00:12:03,921 --> 00:12:05,088
Feather has permanent
athlete's foot.
280
00:12:05,155 --> 00:12:07,557
Feather, show them
how you dance
281
00:12:07,625 --> 00:12:10,393
upon the line of slack.
282
00:12:12,363 --> 00:12:14,430
You, uh...
You a sports guy?
283
00:12:14,498 --> 00:12:18,301
- Sure. Uh, boxing, tennis.
- Oh.
284
00:12:18,369 --> 00:12:20,370
Any team sports?
285
00:12:20,437 --> 00:12:24,173
Nascar.
The Amazing Race.
286
00:12:24,241 --> 00:12:25,742
Phillies fan, though, right?
287
00:12:25,809 --> 00:12:27,110
You mean horses?
288
00:12:27,177 --> 00:12:30,079
No, like ba... baseball.
The baseball team.
289
00:12:30,147 --> 00:12:32,482
I like the Red Sox.
I'm from Vermont, so...
290
00:12:32,549 --> 00:12:36,419
Okay. Good talk.
291
00:12:36,487 --> 00:12:38,922
I have nothing in common
with Plop.
292
00:12:38,989 --> 00:12:40,990
All right, who's next?
Nellie.
293
00:12:41,058 --> 00:12:44,761
Oh, I would rather watch you
and your talented friends.
294
00:12:44,828 --> 00:12:46,729
Nonsense.
Get up here.
295
00:12:46,797 --> 00:12:48,965
- Go ahead.
- Come on.
296
00:12:51,702 --> 00:12:54,737
Uh, you gonna wear your heels?
297
00:12:54,805 --> 00:12:57,006
I'm very self-conscious
about my feet.
298
00:12:57,074 --> 00:12:58,107
Okay. Sure.
299
00:12:58,175 --> 00:13:01,411
There you go.
Atta girl.
300
00:13:01,478 --> 00:13:03,146
Hey, all right.
301
00:13:03,213 --> 00:13:06,115
Whoa! You suck.
302
00:13:06,183 --> 00:13:08,618
All right, who's next?
Darryl.
303
00:13:08,686 --> 00:13:09,919
This seems like
the kind of thing
304
00:13:09,987 --> 00:13:11,354
white people
with dreadlocks do.
305
00:13:11,422 --> 00:13:13,423
Dwight Jr., this looks
like your speed.
306
00:13:13,490 --> 00:13:15,591
Uh, I guess I can
give it a shot.
307
00:13:15,659 --> 00:13:17,093
Yeah, come on.
Get up here.
308
00:13:17,161 --> 00:13:20,196
- Just hop on up.
- Okay.
309
00:13:20,264 --> 00:13:24,033
Focus on the horizon.
310
00:13:24,101 --> 00:13:26,836
Whoa!
Look at this guy.
311
00:13:30,607 --> 00:13:31,641
I've always been good
at anything
312
00:13:31,708 --> 00:13:33,109
that required balance.
313
00:13:33,177 --> 00:13:35,144
My doctor says I have
gigantic inner ears.
314
00:13:35,212 --> 00:13:38,381
Go, Dwight Jr.
315
00:13:38,449 --> 00:13:40,483
- Yes!
- Boo! Unimpressed.
316
00:13:40,551 --> 00:13:43,553
It's a tightrope for babies.
Boo.
317
00:13:43,620 --> 00:13:45,021
All right, let's see you do it.
318
00:13:45,089 --> 00:13:46,489
All right, let me show you
how a real man
319
00:13:46,557 --> 00:13:48,091
walks across a flaccid cord.
320
00:13:59,269 --> 00:14:00,403
Oh, ho ho ho!
321
00:14:00,471 --> 00:14:03,039
Who ordered the hot apple fail?
322
00:14:03,107 --> 00:14:05,808
Okay, I am just
getting started, okay?
323
00:14:05,876 --> 00:14:10,880
You got this.
This is all you.
324
00:14:10,948 --> 00:14:13,082
Oh!
325
00:14:13,150 --> 00:14:16,285
- Oh...
- Got ourselves a yard sale.
326
00:14:19,590 --> 00:14:21,224
- Oh.
- Whoa.
327
00:14:21,291 --> 00:14:22,392
Balls and face.
328
00:14:22,459 --> 00:14:24,794
- It's not a race, Dwight.
- Aah!
329
00:14:27,631 --> 00:14:30,266
- Oh!
- Well, it's official...
330
00:14:30,334 --> 00:14:33,770
Old Dwight is lame,
and new Dwight is cool.
331
00:14:33,837 --> 00:14:35,204
That's not true.
332
00:14:35,272 --> 00:14:37,874
Just give me another chance.
333
00:14:37,941 --> 00:14:39,542
- But your mouth is...
- This is a bloodbath.
334
00:14:39,610 --> 00:14:41,077
All right, I'm calling this.
335
00:14:41,145 --> 00:14:42,845
- What?
- It's enough of this.
336
00:14:42,913 --> 00:14:44,414
Everyone, let's go back
to work.
337
00:14:44,481 --> 00:14:46,182
This is a stupid activity.
338
00:14:46,250 --> 00:14:48,251
I would be embarrassed
to be good at it.
339
00:14:51,455 --> 00:14:54,590
Get...
340
00:14:54,658 --> 00:14:56,359
Idiots!
341
00:15:04,437 --> 00:15:07,072
Slacklining.
Big deal.
342
00:15:07,140 --> 00:15:08,907
Untie that rope,
give it to a couple
343
00:15:08,975 --> 00:15:10,142
of pigtailed school girls,
344
00:15:10,210 --> 00:15:11,577
let them start jumping with it
345
00:15:11,644 --> 00:15:14,313
while chanting a rhyme
and giggling about boys.
346
00:15:14,381 --> 00:15:16,148
Doesn't seem so macho now,
does it?
347
00:15:16,216 --> 00:15:19,018
It's a jump rope!
348
00:15:30,363 --> 00:15:33,999
Dwight!
349
00:15:34,067 --> 00:15:36,001
Pam?
Hey, I'm up here.
350
00:15:36,069 --> 00:15:38,871
Up the ladder.
Come on.
351
00:15:47,981 --> 00:15:50,916
What are you doing?
352
00:15:50,984 --> 00:15:54,086
Come here.
I'll show you.
353
00:15:55,688 --> 00:15:58,023
Why do you want this cat?
354
00:15:58,091 --> 00:15:59,124
Um, I don't want it, really.
355
00:15:59,192 --> 00:16:00,993
How would you support the cat?
356
00:16:01,061 --> 00:16:03,095
What are your ambitions?
357
00:16:03,163 --> 00:16:04,196
I want to start
my own business.
358
00:16:04,264 --> 00:16:05,764
I want to be a millionaire.
359
00:16:05,832 --> 00:16:08,934
Lots of things... Travel.
Make the world a better place.
360
00:16:09,002 --> 00:16:11,070
Earn an MBA at night.
361
00:16:11,137 --> 00:16:13,572
Have you taken any
concrete steps?
362
00:16:13,640 --> 00:16:16,809
Well, I'm still just...
fitting in here.
363
00:16:16,876 --> 00:16:18,110
You know, getting used
to the new job.
364
00:16:18,178 --> 00:16:22,147
- Mm-hmm.
- But definitely on the agenda.
365
00:16:22,215 --> 00:16:25,417
But that is a good idea, Angela.
I should make a list.
366
00:16:25,485 --> 00:16:28,320
Oh, come on, Pete.
367
00:16:28,388 --> 00:16:30,389
God, that's just sad.
368
00:16:30,457 --> 00:16:33,659
If he doesn't watch himself,
he's gonna be here for years
369
00:16:33,726 --> 00:16:35,694
doing nothing.
370
00:16:40,967 --> 00:16:44,036
Wow, maybe Pete is the new Jim.
371
00:16:47,574 --> 00:16:51,243
Do you see how the trapeze
completely surrounds the wire?
372
00:16:51,311 --> 00:16:53,412
That means it is
literally impossible
373
00:16:53,480 --> 00:16:55,080
for anyone to fall off.
374
00:16:55,148 --> 00:16:56,448
So you will merely sit below
375
00:16:56,516 --> 00:16:57,749
and be my counterweight
376
00:16:57,817 --> 00:16:59,618
as I pedal across
the parking lot
377
00:16:59,686 --> 00:17:00,786
to that telephone pole,
378
00:17:00,854 --> 00:17:02,287
- I will?
- You will.
379
00:17:02,355 --> 00:17:03,922
Yeah, we weigh about
the same, wouldn't you say?
380
00:17:03,990 --> 00:17:07,793
- Sure, if you weigh 105 pounds.
- So you'll do it?
381
00:17:07,861 --> 00:17:09,828
- No.
- Come on!
382
00:17:09,896 --> 00:17:12,097
This will be the only thrill
of your boring life.
383
00:17:12,165 --> 00:17:14,333
Dwight, you may find this
hard to believe,
384
00:17:14,400 --> 00:17:16,001
but I love my boring life...
385
00:17:16,069 --> 00:17:17,503
- Come on.
- Exactly the way it is.
386
00:17:17,570 --> 00:17:18,570
- No, Pam.
- Yes.
387
00:17:18,638 --> 00:17:19,972
And there's nothing you can say
388
00:17:20,039 --> 00:17:22,875
that would get me to run
the slightest risk of losing it.
389
00:17:22,942 --> 00:17:25,244
- Please? Please, Pam?
- Find someone else.
390
00:17:25,311 --> 00:17:26,712
I don't know, ask Phyllis.
391
00:17:26,779 --> 00:17:28,447
I can't use Phyllis.
Are you kidding me?
392
00:17:28,515 --> 00:17:29,982
The moment she steps
off this bar
393
00:17:30,049 --> 00:17:31,383
I'll be launched into space.
394
00:17:31,451 --> 00:17:34,453
God, you're so insensitive!
395
00:17:39,058 --> 00:17:40,058
Why are you getting rid of it?
396
00:17:40,126 --> 00:17:41,293
Allergies.
397
00:17:41,361 --> 00:17:43,462
- Your husband?
- No, the baby.
398
00:17:43,530 --> 00:17:45,631
Please, it's my husband's
favorite cat.
399
00:17:45,698 --> 00:17:47,232
He's broken up about it.
400
00:17:47,300 --> 00:17:49,034
It's the only time
I've seen him cry
401
00:17:49,102 --> 00:17:50,202
other than our wedding night.
402
00:17:50,270 --> 00:17:53,505
You know what?
I will take Comstock.
403
00:17:53,573 --> 00:17:57,743
Really?
Oh, Oscar, thank you!
404
00:17:57,810 --> 00:17:59,511
I'll come by after work
and pick him up.
405
00:17:59,579 --> 00:18:02,781
Yay!
Oh, poor Robert.
406
00:18:02,849 --> 00:18:04,383
He won't get to say good-bye.
407
00:18:04,450 --> 00:18:06,185
He has this business dinner
tonight.
408
00:18:06,252 --> 00:18:08,187
Oh, c'est la vie.
409
00:18:08,254 --> 00:18:12,858
Please don't teach
the cat French.
410
00:18:12,926 --> 00:18:15,027
Yeah, good news.
411
00:18:15,094 --> 00:18:16,361
Tonight, when you come over
for dinner,
412
00:18:16,429 --> 00:18:19,398
you can play
with your old buddy Comstock.
413
00:18:28,308 --> 00:18:29,908
You ready?
414
00:18:29,976 --> 00:18:31,477
Yeah.
415
00:18:31,544 --> 00:18:32,778
You know what?
I'll meet you down there.
416
00:18:32,845 --> 00:18:33,879
I've just gotta make
a quick call.
417
00:18:33,947 --> 00:18:36,582
Okay.
418
00:18:43,423 --> 00:18:45,691
Okay.
419
00:18:45,758 --> 00:18:49,761
All right...
420
00:18:49,829 --> 00:18:52,798
Oh, God.
421
00:19:25,531 --> 00:19:29,935
Attention, employees
of Dunder Mifflin.
422
00:19:30,003 --> 00:19:33,238
Everyone thinks the new guys
are so cool
423
00:19:33,306 --> 00:19:35,274
'cause they can slackline.
424
00:19:35,341 --> 00:19:36,808
Ooh!
425
00:19:36,876 --> 00:19:39,911
Hey, Clark, this is what
a real salesman looks like.
426
00:19:41,914 --> 00:19:43,849
They say that you only
live once,
427
00:19:43,916 --> 00:19:45,317
and I'm about to prove it.
428
00:19:45,385 --> 00:19:47,919
- Dwight Schrute!
- Dwight!
429
00:19:47,987 --> 00:19:49,921
Hey, man, it's Halpert.
430
00:19:49,989 --> 00:19:52,024
Did you go
to the other guy yet?
431
00:19:52,091 --> 00:19:56,028
Great. Don't.
I'm in.
432
00:19:56,095 --> 00:20:00,365
Yeah, yep, I'm all in.
433
00:20:00,433 --> 00:20:03,702
Okay, talk to you soon.
Bye.
434
00:20:08,174 --> 00:20:10,776
Yeah!
435
00:20:13,546 --> 00:20:15,647
Whoo-hoo!
436
00:20:16,749 --> 00:20:19,384
Whoo-hoo!
437
00:20:24,023 --> 00:20:26,958
- Call somebody.
- Hang on!
438
00:20:27,026 --> 00:20:30,796
Hang on!
Hold on, Dwight!
439
00:20:32,565 --> 00:20:34,800
In the parking lot today,
there was a circus.
440
00:20:34,867 --> 00:20:38,537
The copier did tricks
on the high wire.
441
00:20:38,604 --> 00:20:40,739
A lady tried to give away
a baby that looked like a cat.
442
00:20:40,807 --> 00:20:44,309
There was a Dwight impersonator
and a Jim impersonator.
443
00:20:44,377 --> 00:20:46,244
A strongman crushed a turtle.
444
00:20:46,312 --> 00:20:50,315
I laughed and I cried.
445
00:20:50,383 --> 00:20:53,518
Not bad for a day in the life
of a dog food company.
446
00:20:58,594 --> 00:21:00,762
Crap, sorry, Nellie.
447
00:21:00,830 --> 00:21:03,364
Once again, I understand
that old habits die hard,
448
00:21:03,432 --> 00:21:07,368
but if everyone would kindly
walk their refuse
449
00:21:07,436 --> 00:21:10,271
to the trash bins,
instead of tossing them,
450
00:21:10,339 --> 00:21:11,773
then we would...
451
00:21:11,841 --> 00:21:13,775
Oh...
Swish.
452
00:21:13,843 --> 00:21:15,376
Oh, it's nothing to do with me.
453
00:21:15,444 --> 00:21:19,981
I just happen to be sitting
near to where the bins are.
454
00:21:20,049 --> 00:21:22,250
There are two things
that I am passionate about...
455
00:21:22,318 --> 00:21:27,722
Recycling and revenge.
456
00:21:28,295 --> 00:21:29,300
Flook.
457
00:21:29,330 --> 00:21:30,830
Sync and corrections by n17t01
www.addic7ed.com